45:50 it's the Theatre of Blood raid, old school runescape, could take about an hour, and relies on coordination with the raid team. Four~+ other players coordinated their time to do the game activity together.
I cannot stress enough that in the second post, it really is NOT on the poster, it's on Darin. Like dude, you have an opportunity to be the best husband ever, to have a hand in saving your wife's life, and you won't because you just NEED to be homophobic. If my wife's best shot at getting a kidney transplant was to apologize to someone from high school, I'd be on my knees giving an "apology" as soon as I could.
Bro could get in his knees and give more than an apology and I'd still say no. The issue is that the FAMILY sided with him and basically kicked Op out of there family to support a bigot. Fuck all of them.
Yeah the husband is definitely a piece of shit for being a homophobic asshole past high school. And the family are definitely pieces of shit for enabling that behavior. If they actually cared about OP, they would've called out the homophobic POS boyfriend, but they didn't. The whole family are pieces of shit. The sister for marrying someone who's not only was your sibling's bully, but staying with him after calling your brother a slur and not demanding him to apologize. The parents for laughing and agreeing with the bully after calling him a slur.
It sounds like there was never a quid pro quo, but that just shows that Darren is so insensitive that he doesn't consider that could help, or he's so awful that he never considered that he could have done something wrong.
Darren apologizing in the moment of need wouldn´t be a true apology. It would just be a "payment" for him saving the life of his sister. I imagine making Darren apologize here would only deepen the resentment the family feels for OP. It´s not on Darren in this case. It is on the sister and the rest of the family for putting the relationship with a douchebag over their familial bonds.
@@YamiNoArujiI’m with you it is on the family. Darrin is a d***. But laughing at someone coming into your home, making fun of your son and then being shocked your son doesn’t feel a part of your family anymore? Get outta here. You lost family rights in the moment you chose to not be there for your son.
Tbh the runescape thing kinda remind of like setting up dnd. You and your group rarely do it, because of like conflicting schedule or whatever, but you managed to set something up. However, one of the players suddenly said "hey my so wanted to have sex, see ya" and the game I asked work off for ended suddenly
At least with a D&D session, a lot of the time it's a weekly thing and if you just started you could say "hey guys can we just skip this week" but that doesn't tend to happen with raids in MMOs.
The thing that tips the 3rd one for me is the fact that she spent so long doing all this without checking if he would be available. Like would it have killed her to have just said: "hey, don't start anything that takes a long time" when she started getting ready. It really would have been that simple
Some people don't have that foresight. I think the reason she got so mad was she just doesn't know enough about the game to know how long it takes to set up a raid. I think she's under the impression he just queued into a Fortnite lobby and can't be bothered to get off it for her.
She says she wanted to surprise her partner which is why she didnt communicate her intentions beforehand, not all sexual encounters need to be planned out in a calendar
@MrGshinobi this gets solved by asking something at dinner like "Any plans tonight? Oh, a raid? How long is that gonna take?" Then she can start getting ready at a more appropriate time and the guy doesn't have to make that choice. Or she ask if he can cancel, or something.
@@__N8ofc that would have been the perfect world, but I still can't really blame the wife. Like look at it from the boyfriend's pov "okay I'm having some important troubles with my sex life with my partner, and she made a huge effort and is down to do it first of all I'd do it because it badly helps our relationship, secondly I'd do it because that's just too hot for a partner to do. As someone who has gamed for 20 years (albeit not as much in games with guilds, raids and such) I'd not put a game over an opportunity to better my difficult love life. If the problem of sex wasn't there he'd 1000000% be an asshole for dropping the raid, but not in this case
@Ironpecker Don't get me wrong, I don't blame her. In fact,I'm fully on team Peeps for this. I was just pointing out a way that could've smoothed out some of the wrinkles. A little bit of communication would've helped the issue a lot and still could've kept the mystique/surprise factor. But I'm looking at thinvs in retrospect and from an outside pov, so it's easier to for me to simply say what she could've done.
I think that the main issue with the Runescape thing is that the wife doesn't understand how difficult it is to set up a raid and how long in advance he would have needed to plan it for an 8-person raid. I think she is under the impression that he essentially just queued into a Fortnite lobby and could quit anytime with little consequence but chose not to, in which case, she would be completely justified in having that reaction. If however, he said "sorry babe, I'm on the phone with AT&T and it took an hour and a half to get off hold. It's been 30 minutes so give me like 10 more minutes and I'll be right over", I don't think she would have had the same reaction.
The 2nd story really had me fuming. I may insult my family all I want because they know I love them, and would do anything for them. BUT, if I would bring someone to my house, and have them insult any of my family memebers, it's on. How the fuck are you a guest in someone's home and not know how to behave? And tbe rest of the family didn't evem bother to defend him or even correct him. OP is the bigger man in that situation because I would have called my family out for thier offenses towards me before hanging up. Got damn
So the trick on the last one is you just substitute in like, a pick-up basketball/baseball game or something. It's not about the activity itself not existing anymore, it's the fact you're unilaterally deciding those other people's time doesn't matter and they now also have to either start over and find someone else last second, or also don't get to do it.
The "turning dials" bit is INSANE. Watching debatebro generational talent like MBT exclusively do card game and reddit reading club content is like if lebron james decided to dedicate the rest of his life to playing League of Legends. Get this man on a political stream NOW
Regarding the third one, Joseph is 1000% correct when he said you have to be understanding when plans made spontaneously don’t work out. It’s completely unfair to be mad at your partner for not wanting to drop everything and have sex especially when they’ve been so understanding of you not wanting to have sex as frequently. I feel like Jordan really missed the mark here, it was kind of annoying actually
The guy in the last story literally chose wife over video games. He most likely called the game night early. The wife surprised him with sex, the guy had plans already but regardless agreed to drop them. All he asked for was 15 min. Is the problem that he didn't immediately alt f4?
Second story at 37: 25, it is important to clarify that Ellie's life has not been endangered by her brother. Ellie had the gift of a full-blood sibling, but she valued the chance of a relationship with her brother's tormentor over her relationship with her brother. This is a severe consequence of that decision, but the stakes were made clear years ago.
Definitely disagree with Danny on his criticism of asking what the woman's favorite character was, I have plenty of exchanges with service people in the 25 - 40 seconds we see each other in the drive through in the morning or at lunch based on just small things that happen, and I think those kinds of interactions can make both peoples' days better! Obviously if someone expresses they aren't interested in continuing the conversation, take the hint, but this idea that it's wrong to comment on the small connections we have with strangers in our lives because they could possibly not want to talk about it is just wrong.
Exactly. If she had just said a character then ask what he'd like, it would have been fine. To just shut someone down when they try to connect to you on a basic level is just shitty.
@@entius6843 it is not just shitty, she does not owe you anything dude. They are working. You have no idea how their day has been and this is your first time ever meeting them. PLEASE just take the hint
@@kindredclawthorne the story isn't about me, bro. I would never ask someone that because I'd be way too scared they'd be rude to me and I'd end up rethinking my entire life. They are working and their job is to give the customer a hospitable experience, which involves entertaining the customer's boring small talk. I'm not saying have a full conversation, but in these jobs you gotta learn to redirect the conversation to business, not outright ignore the things customers say.
@@entius6843 Nowhere in their job description does it say they have to tell this customer their favorite anime character. Their job is to take the customer's order, and that's what they tried to do. They owe this customer nothing else.
Peeps either doesn't value, or doesn't understand the social context involved in the third story. Like if he was playing NBA 2K by himself yeah you hit the fucking pause button but this is asking him to inconvenience and waste the time of friends for her which I think is unfair for the dude.
My boy Danny did an amazing job of breaking it down with the last story. I also personally would give up the game for my partner, but if you look at the situation more objectively, she should be willing to give him the time to finish his business especially since she knows how important this part of the relationship is to him.
according to jordan apparently the 7 other people who aligned their schedules to do something will always be there but the wife he literally lives with for the last 7 years will not be there always
i genuinely think peeps made a snap judgment on the third one based on the fact that the thing in question was a runescape raid. it's not about the raid in question its about having prior plans with friends that you don't want to put out! it's completely reasonable!!
however joseph really needs to work on his analogy game what the fuck were those dude why are you INCAPABLE of coming up with an equivalent analogy i'd love to live in your brain for a day
are you wiping????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
#2 Is rough...to put it mildly. I get the decision, but feel like all three made up their minds surprisingly quickly. There are two points/ issues for me: 1. On one hand I'm in no position to relate even closely to OPs position. On the other hand I'm also not that much of a family person. But still, I think I'd value blood over any kind of grievances. Even if I would have been alienated from my family for years, if it came to some potentially life threatening medical issue, I'd at least try to help my own sister of all people however I could. Who knows, maybe this would even be a good opportunity to work on those old wounds. Which kinda leads into my second issue: 2. Maybe I missed some points, since I listened to this while doing other things. But as far as I understood, after this old bully got back into his life, OP just silently left his family until they needed him years later. It was never mentioned, that the family made an effort to apologize or talk to him. But then again, we also only hear one side of the story. Maybe there were efforts, that OP simply didn't mention. Also the other way around, (again, as far as I got it) it wasn't mentioned wether or not the OP ever tried to talk to the family and explain how their behaviors hurt him. Maybe from their perspective, the OP simply went to live his own life and both sides just didn't talk much because that's how life sometimes is (even among family). Then to this current situation, I read comments like "it's on the sister and the now husband for not asking him together with an apology". But again, we don't even know, if the sister even is aware of how her actions/ relationship hurt the OP. Plus we don't know any details about their current situation. Maybe the sister is in the hospital and not able to do anything much. And to me it sounds rather understandable that the mom would be the first one to try to reach out to her son instead of the husband who barely had any contact to the OP.
It's also very probable that the sister got the news that her brother was one of the few people who could donate and, considering her relationship with him, decided to not even bother him because she knows it'd be too much to ask probably. And that could be why the mom asked the brother
First story, although I think you shouldn't hit on people in their workplace, commenting on the tattoo is honestly a pretty harmless way of going about it. Leaves room for plausible deniability and deescalating the awkwardness so long as you TAKE THE DAMN HINT
she could've just answered the question then asked what he'd like to order. 80% of the human body is covered most of the time, she got the tattoo in a visible spot so people ask about it. all because she didn't want HIM to ask about it doesn't justify just ignoring what he said.
I do think it's harmless, but I also just think it's best not to do things like that when someone is at work, especially if it's the first time seeing them. Maybe it's just me, but if I go to a coffee shop or retail establishment, I just want to get my stuff and go. I know they just want to do their job, so I don't want to make uncomfortable small talk with someone who just wants to do their job
She was being rude, him inquiring about her tattoo and her saying nothing is rude. He responded childishly. No one is an asshole, they were both rude and weird
About #3: I'm sorry, if you're trying to suprise your SO with sex and they don't wanna at the moment for whatever reason that's not on them. Like, it's not even like he wasn't in the mood, but he had prior plans that she's trying to disrupt cause she's in her once-a-month unpredictable horny mood and decided she wanted to be cute about it instead of telling him at any point during the day. Like come on, he's ToBing with the boys, do you know how hard it can be to get a group of friends together for any kinda group activity in anything?
If a woman doesn’t want to have sex because she’s not into it, it’s ok (and it is), but if a man doesn’t want to have sex because he’s not into it at the moment, he’s in the wrong? That’s crazy
Last one I have actually been in the raid partner slot (not in rune scape more general hang out) And it’s frustrating To have constantly made to put off plans that I planned my night around cause friends wants to get laid for the 50th time
Fantastic episode guys! Agree with your majority vote all three this time, Jordan is just incredibly wrong on round 3. Dropping a planned commitment with your friends that was clearly scheduled and planned beforehand to go have spontaneous sex just means youre a pretty huge asshole to your friends. I feel for the wife about the overall difficulties of a lowered sex drive as i have one myself, but in this specific scenario she was being the AH.
For the third story, many people have spoken based on the situation, but I believe there is a more general lesson in that if you are planning a surprise, you need to acknowledge that it can go south. That the reception can be not what you expect. I will say that it's understandable to feel sad that a well intentioned surprise does not pan out as you expect, and you should acknowledge that sadness. But you also should accept that this was a possibility from the start when doing something without prior confirmation.
Her: Takes over an hour to get ready and in the mood on her own in her own head all day. Him: This is great! Let me get ready. Her: You. Lost. Your. Shot.
This episode just shows Peeps values sex over not being an asshole. Weird to keep doubling down after being told "choosing sex ruins the nights of 7 other people and this can't just be picked up tomorrow." Even if it is for the bit
YES. If he would’ve owned up to it and said “I would’ve ditched the guys, I know it’s a dick move but I would’ve” then ok, at least you’re upfront about it. But he just kept beating around the bush a lot
I think you're just choosing between "ruining the night of 7 other people" and "losing a big chance to better your complicated love life", and I just think the girlfriend is very valid for feeling not that important in his eyes, like it's not just sex
He values his wife over a game. Seriously this is why mmos like that suck surely 7 people can continue the 20 minutes of game without him and could completely understand. No shot the game comes first in this scenario
@ducky36F it's social time with friends that he values. When I'm on Baldur's Gate with my buds, it's something we coordinate and look forward to. We talk about our lives. We support each other. It's important quality time with friends I don't always get to see. Dude wasn't prioritizing the game, he was prioritizing his friends. It's also super unfair and egotistical for the wife to expect him to just drop everything instantly. Idk about yall but if I'm really focused on my hobby, I need a few minutes to change gears to a "sexy" mindset. Not 15, but maybe 5. I need time to stop focusing on the song I'm learning or the boss I'm grading and focus on sex with my partner. Not all of us dudes are ready to go the microsecond a chance at sex arises. It's fucked up to expect us to be.
@@AL-ry5lyI have never had a friend not tell me go spend time with your partner if I told them she made an effort to do something. I have a strong suspicion his friends would say the same.
The thing with number 3 is that she's not really working on the relationship, because she didn't at any point check on him, like imagine if she had put some make up on and asked if he wanted to have a little fun in half an hour, he probably could have even adjusted some timings around or something, but she's like "this is it for the month come over rn", that's not working on a relationship!
The difference is that YOU wanted to have sex Peeps, the guy didn't as much as whatever else they were doing. There is NO OBLIGATION to have sex, there is no obligation if you are a man nor a woman, the idea that sex is this amazing thing that is better than everything else is stupid and forced by society (and advertisement). The examples that Joseph did were trying to force the same thing, to ask to give up something YOU WANT MORE than sex, and in that case you have zero obligations to say yes, that's the point. You say yes because you want to, it's not a valid argument
Damn, this is what I wanted to say but couldn’t piece it together in words. You’re allowed to not regard sex as something so important that you’d fuck over 7 other people for it. Even if I wasn’t getting it as frequently, if I’m not in the mood for it and it’s not the right time, it’s simply not the right time. It’s not the only way to be intimate with your partner.
The second one is tough. And i think people need to hear this even if they don't like it : our body, our life is precious and we don't have the duty to sacrifice it in any kind of way to someone, even a relative. This sounds selfish, and it is, but we have the right to be selfish to some extent. This guys doesn't have to give up anything to save his sister especially if his sister didn't give a F about him. And no one should make him feel bad about it. Because not everyone is a selfless savior who would do anything to save someone, even someone we know, and that's fine. And that's why those who give up on organs, blood or risks their lives for other are true heroes. Because those selfess act aren't and shouldn't be taken for granted.
I think in that situation I would have said the same thing then definitely reconsidered it because I am way too willing to write blank cheques for people. I think that's what I'd do but I think if I agreed to it that would be the wrong decision.
im super late but this one is so insanely good bc, to me, it really tests how broadly you can see a relationship web. there's like 7 other people and, regardless of how dignified you see the hobby, their time is also worth respecting! it's a pre-planned activity and these are adults who have to schedule things. being put in a position where you gotta tell em to fuck off is, in fact, unfair! being the guy and realizing "piss them off or piss me off" is an ultimatum that is now a factor is nerve-wracking! i wouldn't want that in a relationship! she's not a Female Manipulator or whatever, it's the one-two punch of bottling up her feelings (positive and negative) coupled with not really understanding the position she put him in that makes me feel bad! she doesn't deserve to hurt herself like that, she put herself in a super vulnerable position in a way that she did not have to! it sucks, but you can only realize that if you get past the idea that any given hobby has a respectability threshold required in order to be deemed worthy of respect!
The second story messes with me so much. I cannot imagine either having someone i despise that much or cutting my family off. I cannot imagine leaving my sister like that, but I cannot picture her doing something that would hurt me so. This one is very hard to judge.
For the runescape story I dont think either are the asshole. I think it's hard for people to conceptualize what it means to be doing a coordinated thing in a video game with people online if they have not actually done it, for example peeps. If you think about it as like playing a game of basketball with friends at the gym or a board game at someones house where you are in a physical space together I think it's a bit easier to understand. So since it's so common for people to fail to understand that dynamic I think it's fine for a misunderstanding about it to happen once but the couple should sit down and talk about why it happened and why him not leaving in the middle of what they are doing is important etiquette.
As a woman with a rock bottom sex drive, it is really hard to put yourself in the mood. I think its understandable to be upset if you get rejected, even just for a little bit, because its a lot of work for me to get in that headspace, and it takes active effort to maintain. That being said, the boyfriend is absolutely not an asshole either. I used to raid lead in World of Warcraft, and having to find a random to fill the slot one of your usuals takes sucks, but it is possible. There are plenty of people running whatever content you want to do in these types of games, and you can find one to take someones place. I think that, if this is a known issue that they've talked about, he should know that its a big deal that she is in the mood, and he should capitalize on it asap since she is making this effort *for him*. Ive been on both sides of this type of problem before, and it sucks for both of em. She isnt obligated to stay worked up, and he isnt obligated to drop his game. There really isnt anyone 'in the wrong' here.
Man the second one is rough. The fact that he bullied him in high school sucks, and if that was it it'd be an easy get over it you gotta get tested. But he's unrepentant, and his sister and dad both went haha yeah homophobia is funny, and no efforts were made to ever apologize or make ammends, which really pushes it to be much closer to wether he owes her or not. The fact is, I don't think he owes them anything and maybe if he did get tested and 8t was a match, maybe he has an in but also maybe he doesn't! Maybe he sacrifices so much and they turn it around on him to get over being insulted and belittled to try and get him back in the family and it sucks. These people showed you that they Do Not Care About You, and you can't give everything to people that wouldn't help you.
#3 is so contextual. If it were just a gamer gooner grinding league solo queue or whatever, obviously she's NTA. But she's putting forward a situation where he's forced to choose between a group of people that he presumably also cares about at least a bit and her. And even then, he still chooses her, but does the bare minimum for his friends to not completely ruin their night. If you can't even do for your SO the courtesy of coming in and saying "Hey, I'm gonna go get dolled up, don't get too involved," which is STILL being spontaneous for him, then I don't understand you. Jordan, who's normally so on the mark with the "communicate with your freakin partner" angle, completely whiffed on this one.
For the third post, I have to disagree with Joseph and Danny saying the poster is the asshole. To preface, I think the bf was well within his right to choose the game over sex. I raid with a group in FFXIV, and regularly make scheduled plans with other friends to play games; I know how important it is to not flake on your friends. That being said, I feel for the girlfriend. Sex and the frequency at which she and her bf have it is starting to become an issue for their relationship, mainly because of her own lack of sex drive. They've even come to an agreement that if she wasn't 100% against having sex, she would put in effort to try and get in the mood. That is a not an insignificant amount of commitment on her part. So one day, against all odds, she finds it in herself to plan a night of sex for the two of them. Unfortunately, he was already committed to doing something, which derailed her plan, and it took her out of the mood for sex. Now, I do think what she said was pretty mean in the context of their relationship (as far as we know), saying that he lost his chance at sex for picking the game over her. But I can understand why she feels hurt, and I can't fault her for feeling that way. She made an effort to try and take a step in resolving a problem in their relationship, and she feels like her effort was in vain. Idk, she clearly felt bad for how the night ended up, and I don't have it in me to call her "the asshole" for trying to put in effort in their relationship, and being disappointed in the result her effort had brought.
Yeah exactly, it's not just a "sex over plans with your friends", their relationship has problems and they decided to kinda try and work on them together.
I think people are putting too much weight on the label of "asshole". Someone can act like an asshole in a situation and not be an irredeemable bastard. And besides all that, the podcast's entire gimmick is definitely deciding if someone is "the asshole", so the title has even less value when they're committed to not labeling a middle ground.
Maybe I'm a bit naive, dumb, young and moralistic but for the second post (if I was in the same situation) I'd still donate my kidney, I don't want to spend my time trying to balance on a scale how much someone made me suffer/are insensitive and the risk for the life of someone I know (he said they are strangers now, but I feel like with family there's always a small connection, it just doesn't disappear). It feels as if I'm sentencing the sister to death and I just think there is no action on earth that warrants killing another person in retaliation (except some self defense cases). I'd not even do it because I want to make my family in my debt, or to try and because I want to make them change their mind about me I'd just want to do it because it feels right. I don't like the mentality that "you don't owe anyone anything" because it just gets you nowhere, it's important to protect your peace but there's no point in protecting it if you can't also help others and do good deeds. That said I don't blame op one bit for feeling conflicted and even refusing this, I just wanted to express how I'd act in that situation (hypotetically ofc, who knows if I could follow through if this really happened).
First story, He tried to make a conversation, She deflected in a non rude way because she is working, And at that point, he should have said, "Sorry! I'll have an XYZ" and fucking leave it. She turned him down, both on having a conversation and anything further, and trying to bull through that is Rude!
EXACTLY. As someone who works retail, I know for myself, a lot of times I just want the retail npc dialogue with customers and move on. I don't want to have a conversation with someone. Sometimes I'll have a conversation with regulars I see a lot, but random customers, I just want to get through the interaction as quick as possible. She's at work, her mind is set on work and doesn't want to have non-work conversations with customers, completely valid!
I can understand if you have poor grasp on social cues not catching the first hint and needing the second hint, but after that the guys "well I don't want anything anymore!" is just indefensible
Girl did not want a better tip it seems. Like five words followed by the request for an order would have both ensured business and very likely a larger tip. It sort feels like there was more going on for her than a dude trying to show interest in an apparently shared hobby. I dunno. I feel like he wasn't in the wrong. A bit of childish when he didn't get the message to storm off. But you're in a service industry, social skills go a long way.
@@raze667 here's the thing tho, she's probably had to deal with guys like so many times already, she knows why he's asking about the tattoo. It's not because he's genuinely interested in the tattoo, it's to hit on her. He's not gonna tip her in the first place. he made it clear that he thought she was cute and wanted to hit on her. She's at work, so she didn't want to get hit on at work and shut that shit down immediately
Story 3 feels so insane to me. Why respond like that when your expectations weren't met? OP even claimed that her libido was becoming a problem. Go get help then.
I see a few people saying that the barista in the first story is rude for not responding to the question and i disagree. I think not responding to the question and just being in customer service npc mode is completely valid. Maybe its just me, but in the years I've worked retail, I've just learned that i don't really want to engage with customers most of the time and want to get through a customer interaction as fast as possible most of the time. We dont know if the barista is having a bad day, or has had a bunch of people hit on her with that exact line, so she just doesn't engage with that conversation. I think in a work place setting, if you dont want small talk, its completely valid to ignore questions not related to your job.
Yeah like him asking in the first place isn't a problem and her brushing it off going NPC mode also isn't a problem. Man should have taken the hint she wasn't in a mood to talk with customers more than she had to.
The third story highlights an issue that always comes up with Reddit react content, which is that this story is so obviously fake I can’t get into the discussion
I Quite literally have refused sex with my GF because i was raiding and, while my friends give me shit about it to this day, we used to raid far less frequently than my gf and I had sex. I stand with gamers
If I ever see someone working and they have a cool tattoo I just go "Hey, love the ink" and move on with my life or order my whatever. It's not that hard. I think the only time I inquired more into something about someone while working was when their phone rang and Sodo Chi No Sadame was playing and I love the intro to the song and inquired what the song was from because it sounded cool.
runescape story in a nutshell: husband: "let's have sex" wife: "sorry babe, i'm not in the mood, and rarely will be" husband: "that's unfortunate, but i understand" wife: "let's have sex" husband: "sounds great, just give me 15 minutes" wife: "never mind, you lost your chance" wife just comes off as self-centered and narcissistic frankly.
relax, she's not narcissistic. going through that much effort and getting rejected feels like shit. she obviously shouldnt have gotten upset at him and given him the cold shoulder. that doesn't make her a narcissist. just a human whose feelings got hurt and reacted poorly.
@@entius6843 sure, she's probably not an actual narcissist and i don't think she's a bad person, but her response in that moment was extremely childish and self-centered. also, she didn't even get rejected. he asked her to wait 15 minutes.
On the last one neither one is the asshole. The guy isn´t the asshole because he shows loyalty to his friends, while the wife isn´t the asshole for acting in the way they agreed on. Remember they agreed on not having s** when she isn´t in the mood. If him gaming in that moment turned her off then it is what it is. My impression of this discussion was that Dany and Joseph immediatly jumped on the train that she doesn´t want to have s** with him anymore because she wants to punish him, while I didn´t get that impression at all when hearing the text of the OP. I get that getting put on hold can feel jarring enough to derail your mood. It´s not her fault for not being able to be horny for extended periods of time, when her s**drive is relatively low anyway. Tldr I dont think either of them is the asshole here, it was just unfortunate that the cicumstances turned out the way that they did.
The first one is so fucking relatable for me. I hate when customers try to start conversations with me in general, and the very few times people were flirting with me while also doing that ended up pissing me off tenfold. Take the hint. Stop fucking talking to me.
I'm all for simping for Danny, but the final round of a YCS is not equivalent to a big raid in an MMORPG. They're share some surface level similarities if you glance over it, but it isnt a comparison that can be made without changing the wieght of the situation
Yeah ducking out of the final round of a YCS doesn't inconvenience anyone, they hand the win to the other guy and move on. If anything it's more convenient for the tournament cause there's no chance you'll go to time and keep people waiting.
Regarding the kidney post: joseph said something along the lines of "shortening your lifespan for your sister". That is not true. Kidney donations don't affect life expectancy. Donating a kidney is actually a low risk surgical procedure. That is to say, it's a surgery with complications as every surgery. But as far as surgeries go it's pretty safe and the complications of it are rare. Don't spread medical misinformation lmao.
I honestly can't believe how wrong all three of them were on that last one. The couple talked about what they could do about this ongoing issue, and agreed that she would put in more work to get herself there when she can. That's EXACTLY what she did. I don't even blame him at all, he was trying to be considerate of all the people he made plans with and thought the delay would be fine, but when it turns out not to be, that's not her fault. She didn't actively decide to "be that kind of partner", this is something they both know she's struggled with and she put her best foot forward. She didn't say "now or never", but the delay left her feeling unwanted and physically uncomfortable and that killed the mood. The remark she made was petty, but I overwhelmingly feel like neither person really did anything wrong here.
I'm still in the middle of hearing it, did they really argue either of them was fully in the wrong? WTF? Like, that situation happening is profoundly unfortunate, but it is just that: unfortunate. Both were willing to take the moment, but neither of them were prepared for it and the moment was lost. That's literally it. Trying to misconstrue that either of them didn't want to put forth the effort for the other is wrong. Edit: ok, hearing a bit of it again, there was one thing she did that is actually being the asshole, namely saying he lost his shot for what he did. Which was trying to clear the time he had coordinated for a time-consuming activity that requires group participation to even be done. That was the one asshole-ish thing she did, but it was understandable.
and the guy chose to be an understanding partner despite the situation. when he's in the mood and she's not, he understands and tried to find a solution. when she was in the mood, he simply asked for 15 minutes and she shut down completely. regardless of her not deciding to "be that kind of partner," that response is completely self-centered.
I do feel for her specifically because of the loss of a sex drive. That can be devastating, especially if the couple does want to have a sexual relationship, but at the same time, sometimes it can be tough to plan video game hangout/raids with friends if you have differing work schedules and the only time you can do said raid is a day you have off of work, so I also understand it being tough to drop everything to have sex. It could've been something he and his friends were looking forward to a lot. I think somethings she said do kinda make her an asshole, but ultimately, I don't think either are fully assholes.
yeah no as much as i do agree the guy is fine for not leaving the raid i can't help but feel for the gf in this situation tbh. i dont think she's an asshole for not being in the mood anymore after that and maybe shes a bit petty but its understandable after going through all that. i get why they dont do nah or esh calls but this really just feel like two people having a small misunderstanding. tldr: i am a misandrist i hate gamers
@@tweekin7outI don’t think it is at all, she was upset, as you would be given this is a problem in their relationship, and she lashed out. If you’re in her position, lying there waiting and probably thinking “he’s choosing a game over me” even if you know that’s not really true it can be hard not to feel hurt
I feel like everyone's blowing the third story out of proportion, it's one singular time regarding something she's had a conversation about feeling bad she has no control over. I have not played any game with any friends (mmo, multiplayer or tabletop) who wouldn't have understood that "Hey guys, nothing is seriously wrong but I need to go spend time with my GF" is something that happens from time to time. They may be a bit miffed in the short term, but it's one night. We'll all move on. If it were a consistent issue then sure, she's just arguably getting into manipulative territory and it needs to be addressed. But it's one single session that you're dropping for the health of your relationship. And you can even follow it up with a conversation about timing, and just... a little bit of warning, as it does seem like her major failing was not implying they should do something after dinner
Nah wtf are danny and joseph on for the third post? Having low sex drive isn't about being manipulative, it's not something that a person wants to dangle over someone's head, it fucking sucks that you just don't/can't do it as much as your partner and it eats away at you, you feel like shit because you feel like you're wrong just for being who you are for feeling something normal (which is not wanting to have sex). And the partner imo should absolutely try to take his chances whenever the girlfriend feels into it. An analogy for me is my knee pain, I've tried to work on it but 3 out of every 4 workouts I just can't do legs because my knee kills me, so whenever I have a good kneee day I just try to have the best training session I can (even if I'm tired or would be a little late for something afterwards). I love training legs and it fucking suck that I don't get to do it as often as I would want to, but because of that I just need to make the most out of the good chances, you can't let those slip by if it's something you care about
I agree with Jordan. If a wife or girlfriend is going to put in that kind of effort to make you happy I would jump out too. The thing I don't agree with is her negative reaction, but in the same way she was devastated by his choice because he chose a game over his significant other.
45:40 story 3…. Naw I would drop that raid so fast 😂…. No shot his friends wouldn’t understand She made a really strong effort she didn’t just walk up and say “let’s have sex” Edit: nah y’all are moving the goal posts: it is a game not something else, it will be there, he can be interchanged, and his raid partners will understand if they are his friends and if they aren’t well who cares?
What Joseph was doing was changing the scenario to something Jordan values than sex, like how the guy in scenario 3 valued the raid. It’s not about it being a game but more about the unreasonable response to a surprise not working out. I’ve been in the situation of the friends and have literally been kicked out from a friends house during a time we’re hanging out because his wife wanted to be with him, and it sucks.
For the first time ever i actually agree with Jordan's take on this podcast, i agree with him on the third story, just put the game down and have sex with your partner. If you think runescape is more of a priority than spending time being intimate with someone you love then you're just wrong.
I'm sorry to say, but you all missed the mark here on the third one. That woman needs to end that relationship. They clearly are not sexually compatible, AND the guy doesn't seem to understand that her needs, while infrequent, need to be met. This lack of getting it is why he doesn't get any I'm not in the mood for sex here's a little head and handy But also, if you are in a position where you don't want to have sex with your partner more than once a month, you probably aren't sexually attracted to them.
love it when people just infer shit into a situation. I actually think he's sexually abusing her by asking and she should call the police. I love my partner with all my heart and think she's physically immaculate. I have a low libido, so we maybe have sex once every two months. I still take care of her and make sure she's satisfied, but people are just wired differently. Sex just isn't that appealing to me. Don't assume things about others you know nothing about.
>the guy doesn't seem to understand that her needs, while infrequent, need to be met what about his needs? she's not meeting his needs, but he's not trying to end the relationship, he's trying to work through it. obviously he's not happy about the lack of sex, but at least he's understanding about the situation. however, the moment she's in the mood, he has to drop everything? what if he wasn't in the mood?
The guy is in no way at fault here. I know its a hack bit to say "what if the genders were swapped?", but if the girl was chatting with her friends on the phone and the guy walked in with bow on his cock and said "babe i'd like my monthly draining NOW" and then he got pissy that she didnt immediately hang up on her friends you would RIGHTFULLY call him an asshole. How is this any different. Also, what if he's not in the mood, does sex ONLY matter when it on her terms exactly and not BOTH of their terms? A Also, the reason that he doesn't get any "head and handy" Is because HE refuses, he doesn't want to engage unless she ALSO 100% wants it. You are just making up reasons to blame him.
Edit 2: Alright fine. I was off a doinky when i wrote the first part. I'm just being hyperbolic and I'm sorry if my "charged language" rubbed anyone the wrong way. I'll leave it up for posterity sake. The guy asked a super innocuous question and deserves basic human respect of not being ignored. If it was two guys, two girls, a dude and a nonbinary person; if they acted the way she did, they'd still be rude. I don't think they deserves death by firing squad, but to act like she did nothing wrong is dumb. There's days we're all rude; that doesn't make it okay. The dude's obviously a freak for how he responded. The lady was being a bitch in the first story. She got a niche interest tattooed on a visible part of her body, this is her penance. Completely ignoring his question is just rude. Of course, he's an asshole for how he reacted, but would it have killed her to say "I really like Kilua. How can I help you today?" then if he pushed it to be curt with him. In the third story, this is the gambit you run when you surprise someone. They won't always be receptive to that surprise. Her teasing him throughout the day would have been way hotter, or even mentioning something to him before she got dressed up so he could wrap up anything and get ready. A Runescape raid is 20-40 people, organizing something like that is such a monumental feat and one person leaving during the raid fucks everything up. No matter if it's stupid because "videogames", this is something important to him. She could've even made it a thing, tease him during the raid or something, have some fun.
No "penance" is deserved from making a choice with one's own body/appearance, least of all one extracted from your employment and unwanted attention from customers.
@spectralphantom380 If you don't want people to comment on the thing YOU choose to show the world, cover it up. "God, I hate it when people comment on my burger t-shirt" as I put on my burger t-shirt. If you don't want attention from customers, don't have a customer-facing job. He was just making conversation with another human. She responded rudely. He also responded rudely.
@@entius6843have you ever worked a service industry job? If you haven't, you have to deal with this kind of shit often. She's probably gotten comments like that a lot and just doesn't want to have a conversation about it at work. She didn't get the tattoo for people to comment on the tattoo, she got the tattoo because it's something she enjoys and wants as a tattoo. Some people want to be strictly professional at work and not have conversations about stuff outside of work. I've worked retail my entire adult life and there are some days where I genuinely don't want to interact with customers outside the basic retail npc dialogue. Sometimes I enjoy the tattoo compliments, other times, I just want the interaction to end as fast as possible so I don't really acknowledge it. To call her a bitch for not entertaining a conversation while he's at work is telling of what kind of person you are
@@entius6843 Assuming she wasn't in the mood to talk about it, I think her response is curt, but reasonable. "Bitch" is definitely extreme. Like the alternative, "thanks, but I'm not in the mood to chat right now" is maybe sliiiightly more polite but not by much. You're suggesting that all people in customer service roles should HAVE to make small talk with their customers or they're assholes, which I don't really think is true.
“Oh I’m gonna say the slur” is a crazy sound bite
*insert Smiger clip here*
Jordan is not beating the “Wife guy” allegations!
45:50 it's the Theatre of Blood raid, old school runescape, could take about an hour, and relies on coordination with the raid team. Four~+ other players coordinated their time to do the game activity together.
The guy and his friends are pretty good at the game if they can do ToB in less than half the average time
@@YamiNoAruji he was probably already in the middle of it
@@YamiNoAruji he's probably gotten pretty good at it, considering all the time not having sex with his girlfriend.
The wife herself said he only took 20 minutes
What's the penalty for failing? Like, can you only enter once weekly or do you just lose your time + spent materials?
this podcast has made friday my favorite day of the week
Tbh same
Peeps's Gamer Card is in danger after that third story
I cannot stress enough that in the second post, it really is NOT on the poster, it's on Darin. Like dude, you have an opportunity to be the best husband ever, to have a hand in saving your wife's life, and you won't because you just NEED to be homophobic.
If my wife's best shot at getting a kidney transplant was to apologize to someone from high school, I'd be on my knees giving an "apology" as soon as I could.
Bro could get in his knees and give more than an apology and I'd still say no. The issue is that the FAMILY sided with him and basically kicked Op out of there family to support a bigot. Fuck all of them.
Yeah the husband is definitely a piece of shit for being a homophobic asshole past high school. And the family are definitely pieces of shit for enabling that behavior. If they actually cared about OP, they would've called out the homophobic POS boyfriend, but they didn't. The whole family are pieces of shit. The sister for marrying someone who's not only was your sibling's bully, but staying with him after calling your brother a slur and not demanding him to apologize. The parents for laughing and agreeing with the bully after calling him a slur.
It sounds like there was never a quid pro quo, but that just shows that Darren is so insensitive that he doesn't consider that could help, or he's so awful that he never considered that he could have done something wrong.
Darren apologizing in the moment of need wouldn´t be a true apology. It would just be a "payment" for him saving the life of his sister. I imagine making Darren apologize here would only deepen the resentment the family feels for OP.
It´s not on Darren in this case. It is on the sister and the rest of the family for putting the relationship with a douchebag over their familial bonds.
@@YamiNoArujiI’m with you it is on the family. Darrin is a d***. But laughing at someone coming into your home, making fun of your son and then being shocked your son doesn’t feel a part of your family anymore? Get outta here. You lost family rights in the moment you chose to not be there for your son.
Tbh the runescape thing kinda remind of like setting up dnd. You and your group rarely do it, because of like conflicting schedule or whatever, but you managed to set something up. However, one of the players suddenly said "hey my so wanted to have sex, see ya" and the game I asked work off for ended suddenly
At least with a D&D session, a lot of the time it's a weekly thing and if you just started you could say "hey guys can we just skip this week" but that doesn't tend to happen with raids in MMOs.
@bagodrago
God I wished it was a weekly thing until someone cancel last minute for 3 weeks in a row
yeah, this was my opinion as I was listening to it, setting up something like a raid/dnd session is a tough thing logistics wise
Today I learned:
Never fcking plan to do anything together with Jordan, he might just cancel on you and leave you alone
Yeah Jordan is a massive prick for that one
The thing that tips the 3rd one for me is the fact that she spent so long doing all this without checking if he would be available. Like would it have killed her to have just said: "hey, don't start anything that takes a long time" when she started getting ready. It really would have been that simple
Some people don't have that foresight. I think the reason she got so mad was she just doesn't know enough about the game to know how long it takes to set up a raid. I think she's under the impression he just queued into a Fortnite lobby and can't be bothered to get off it for her.
She says she wanted to surprise her partner which is why she didnt communicate her intentions beforehand, not all sexual encounters need to be planned out in a calendar
@MrGshinobi this gets solved by asking something at dinner like "Any plans tonight? Oh, a raid? How long is that gonna take?"
Then she can start getting ready at a more appropriate time and the guy doesn't have to make that choice. Or she ask if he can cancel, or something.
@@__N8ofc that would have been the perfect world, but I still can't really blame the wife. Like look at it from the boyfriend's pov "okay I'm having some important troubles with my sex life with my partner, and she made a huge effort and is down to do it first of all I'd do it because it badly helps our relationship, secondly I'd do it because that's just too hot for a partner to do.
As someone who has gamed for 20 years (albeit not as much in games with guilds, raids and such) I'd not put a game over an opportunity to better my difficult love life.
If the problem of sex wasn't there he'd 1000000% be an asshole for dropping the raid, but not in this case
@Ironpecker Don't get me wrong, I don't blame her. In fact,I'm fully on team Peeps for this. I was just pointing out a way that could've smoothed out some of the wrinkles. A little bit of communication would've helped the issue a lot and still could've kept the mystique/surprise factor. But I'm looking at thinvs in retrospect and from an outside pov, so it's easier to for me to simply say what she could've done.
This week on WotC: Slurs and Gamer Rights
I think that the main issue with the Runescape thing is that the wife doesn't understand how difficult it is to set up a raid and how long in advance he would have needed to plan it for an 8-person raid.
I think she is under the impression that he essentially just queued into a Fortnite lobby and could quit anytime with little consequence but chose not to, in which case, she would be completely justified in having that reaction.
If however, he said "sorry babe, I'm on the phone with AT&T and it took an hour and a half to get off hold. It's been 30 minutes so give me like 10 more minutes and I'll be right over", I don't think she would have had the same reaction.
The 2nd story really had me fuming. I may insult my family all I want because they know I love them, and would do anything for them. BUT, if I would bring someone to my house, and have them insult any of my family memebers, it's on. How the fuck are you a guest in someone's home and not know how to behave? And tbe rest of the family didn't evem bother to defend him or even correct him. OP is the bigger man in that situation because I would have called my family out for thier offenses towards me before hanging up. Got damn
100%, he does not owe them SHIT. If she can't get a kidney, her fucking fault.
So the trick on the last one is you just substitute in like, a pick-up basketball/baseball game or something.
It's not about the activity itself not existing anymore, it's the fact you're unilaterally deciding those other people's time doesn't matter and they now also have to either start over and find someone else last second, or also don't get to do it.
The "turning dials" bit is INSANE. Watching debatebro generational talent like MBT exclusively do card game and reddit reading club content is like if lebron james decided to dedicate the rest of his life to playing League of Legends. Get this man on a political stream NOW
tbf his wife IS a political scientist.
@@mrruniccross1226 And I believe he's in law school at the moment as a fall back for if/when Yugioh crashes and burns?
Regarding the third one, Joseph is 1000% correct when he said you have to be understanding when plans made spontaneously don’t work out. It’s completely unfair to be mad at your partner for not wanting to drop everything and have sex especially when they’ve been so understanding of you not wanting to have sex as frequently. I feel like Jordan really missed the mark here, it was kind of annoying actually
The guy in the last story literally chose wife over video games. He most likely called the game night early. The wife surprised him with sex, the guy had plans already but regardless agreed to drop them. All he asked for was 15 min. Is the problem that he didn't immediately alt f4?
Jordan is actually the ultimate wife guy
The lobster bit at the beginning reminded me how much I hate this podcast just as much as I love it
Second story at 37: 25, it is important to clarify that Ellie's life has not been endangered by her brother. Ellie had the gift of a full-blood sibling, but she valued the chance of a relationship with her brother's tormentor over her relationship with her brother. This is a severe consequence of that decision, but the stakes were made clear years ago.
Definitely disagree with Danny on his criticism of asking what the woman's favorite character was, I have plenty of exchanges with service people in the 25 - 40 seconds we see each other in the drive through in the morning or at lunch based on just small things that happen, and I think those kinds of interactions can make both peoples' days better! Obviously if someone expresses they aren't interested in continuing the conversation, take the hint, but this idea that it's wrong to comment on the small connections we have with strangers in our lives because they could possibly not want to talk about it is just wrong.
Exactly. If she had just said a character then ask what he'd like, it would have been fine. To just shut someone down when they try to connect to you on a basic level is just shitty.
@@entius6843 it is not just shitty, she does not owe you anything dude. They are working. You have no idea how their day has been and this is your first time ever meeting them. PLEASE just take the hint
@@kindredclawthorne the story isn't about me, bro. I would never ask someone that because I'd be way too scared they'd be rude to me and I'd end up rethinking my entire life.
They are working and their job is to give the customer a hospitable experience, which involves entertaining the customer's boring small talk. I'm not saying have a full conversation, but in these jobs you gotta learn to redirect the conversation to business, not outright ignore the things customers say.
@@entius6843 Nowhere in their job description does it say they have to tell this customer their favorite anime character. Their job is to take the customer's order, and that's what they tried to do. They owe this customer nothing else.
Peeps either doesn't value, or doesn't understand the social context involved in the third story. Like if he was playing NBA 2K by himself yeah you hit the fucking pause button but this is asking him to inconvenience and waste the time of friends for her which I think is unfair for the dude.
My biggest takeaway from this episode is that MBT is, apparently, *actually* bi, and it wasn't just a bit.
Can't spell Bit without Bi
My boy Danny did an amazing job of breaking it down with the last story. I also personally would give up the game for my partner, but if you look at the situation more objectively, she should be willing to give him the time to finish his business especially since she knows how important this part of the relationship is to him.
according to jordan apparently the 7 other people who aligned their schedules to do something will always be there but the wife he literally lives with for the last 7 years will not be there always
And according to Jordan a man MUST drop everything he’s doing to have sex with his wife even if he’s not into it at the moment
For #3, ToB is for the boys, and it's a pain in the ass so it's super understandable
i genuinely think peeps made a snap judgment on the third one based on the fact that the thing in question was a runescape raid. it's not about the raid in question its about having prior plans with friends that you don't want to put out! it's completely reasonable!!
however joseph really needs to work on his analogy game what the fuck were those dude why are you INCAPABLE of coming up with an equivalent analogy i'd love to live in your brain for a day
are you wiping????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
#2 Is rough...to put it mildly. I get the decision, but feel like all three made up their minds surprisingly quickly. There are two points/ issues for me:
1. On one hand I'm in no position to relate even closely to OPs position. On the other hand I'm also not that much of a family person. But still, I think I'd value blood over any kind of grievances.
Even if I would have been alienated from my family for years, if it came to some potentially life threatening medical issue, I'd at least try to help my own sister of all people however I could. Who knows, maybe this would even be a good opportunity to work on those old wounds.
Which kinda leads into my second issue:
2. Maybe I missed some points, since I listened to this while doing other things. But as far as I understood, after this old bully got back into his life, OP just silently left his family until they needed him years later.
It was never mentioned, that the family made an effort to apologize or talk to him. But then again, we also only hear one side of the story. Maybe there were efforts, that OP simply didn't mention. Also the other way around, (again, as far as I got it) it wasn't mentioned wether or not the OP ever tried to talk to the family and explain how their behaviors hurt him. Maybe from their perspective, the OP simply went to live his own life and both sides just didn't talk much because that's how life sometimes is (even among family).
Then to this current situation, I read comments like "it's on the sister and the now husband for not asking him together with an apology". But again, we don't even know, if the sister even is aware of how her actions/ relationship hurt the OP. Plus we don't know any details about their current situation. Maybe the sister is in the hospital and not able to do anything much. And to me it sounds rather understandable that the mom would be the first one to try to reach out to her son instead of the husband who barely had any contact to the OP.
It's also very probable that the sister got the news that her brother was one of the few people who could donate and, considering her relationship with him, decided to not even bother him because she knows it'd be too much to ask probably. And that could be why the mom asked the brother
The second story is just so sad
First story, although I think you shouldn't hit on people in their workplace, commenting on the tattoo is honestly a pretty harmless way of going about it. Leaves room for plausible deniability and deescalating the awkwardness so long as you TAKE THE DAMN HINT
she could've just answered the question then asked what he'd like to order. 80% of the human body is covered most of the time, she got the tattoo in a visible spot so people ask about it. all because she didn't want HIM to ask about it doesn't justify just ignoring what he said.
I do think it's harmless, but I also just think it's best not to do things like that when someone is at work, especially if it's the first time seeing them. Maybe it's just me, but if I go to a coffee shop or retail establishment, I just want to get my stuff and go. I know they just want to do their job, so I don't want to make uncomfortable small talk with someone who just wants to do their job
She was being rude, him inquiring about her tattoo and her saying nothing is rude. He responded childishly. No one is an asshole, they were both rude and weird
@@ErosIRL disagree
@@ErosIRL absolutely.
The RuneScape raid is theatre of blood, the spider lady is the final phase of the final boss
About #3: I'm sorry, if you're trying to suprise your SO with sex and they don't wanna at the moment for whatever reason that's not on them. Like, it's not even like he wasn't in the mood, but he had prior plans that she's trying to disrupt cause she's in her once-a-month unpredictable horny mood and decided she wanted to be cute about it instead of telling him at any point during the day. Like come on, he's ToBing with the boys, do you know how hard it can be to get a group of friends together for any kinda group activity in anything?
Also I guess the takeaway here is don't make plans with Jordan? i dunno
If a woman doesn’t want to have sex because she’s not into it, it’s ok (and it is), but if a man doesn’t want to have sex because he’s not into it at the moment, he’s in the wrong? That’s crazy
Last one I have actually been in the raid partner slot (not in rune scape more general hang out)
And it’s frustrating
To have constantly made to put off plans that I planned my night around cause friends wants to get laid for the 50th time
Jordan really proving he is not a homie with this one.
Fantastic episode guys!
Agree with your majority vote all three this time, Jordan is just incredibly wrong on round 3. Dropping a planned commitment with your friends that was clearly scheduled and planned beforehand to go have spontaneous sex just means youre a pretty huge asshole to your friends. I feel for the wife about the overall difficulties of a lowered sex drive as i have one myself, but in this specific scenario she was being the AH.
For the third story, many people have spoken based on the situation, but I believe there is a more general lesson in that if you are planning a surprise, you need to acknowledge that it can go south. That the reception can be not what you expect.
I will say that it's understandable to feel sad that a well intentioned surprise does not pan out as you expect, and you should acknowledge that sadness. But you also should accept that this was a possibility from the start when doing something without prior confirmation.
Her: Takes over an hour to get ready and in the mood on her own in her own head all day.
Him: This is great! Let me get ready.
Her: You. Lost. Your. Shot.
If she had been fifteen minutes slower to get ready there wouldn't have been an issue. That's what's so unfortunate, but also Pavlovian about it all.
This episode just shows Peeps values sex over not being an asshole. Weird to keep doubling down after being told "choosing sex ruins the nights of 7 other people and this can't just be picked up tomorrow." Even if it is for the bit
YES. If he would’ve owned up to it and said “I would’ve ditched the guys, I know it’s a dick move but I would’ve” then ok, at least you’re upfront about it. But he just kept beating around the bush a lot
I think you're just choosing between "ruining the night of 7 other people" and "losing a big chance to better your complicated love life", and I just think the girlfriend is very valid for feeling not that important in his eyes, like it's not just sex
He values his wife over a game. Seriously this is why mmos like that suck surely 7 people can continue the 20 minutes of game without him and could completely understand.
No shot the game comes first in this scenario
@ducky36F it's social time with friends that he values. When I'm on Baldur's Gate with my buds, it's something we coordinate and look forward to. We talk about our lives. We support each other. It's important quality time with friends I don't always get to see. Dude wasn't prioritizing the game, he was prioritizing his friends.
It's also super unfair and egotistical for the wife to expect him to just drop everything instantly. Idk about yall but if I'm really focused on my hobby, I need a few minutes to change gears to a "sexy" mindset. Not 15, but maybe 5. I need time to stop focusing on the song I'm learning or the boss I'm grading and focus on sex with my partner.
Not all of us dudes are ready to go the microsecond a chance at sex arises. It's fucked up to expect us to be.
@@AL-ry5lyI have never had a friend not tell me go spend time with your partner if I told them she made an effort to do something. I have a strong suspicion his friends would say the same.
The thing with number 3 is that she's not really working on the relationship, because she didn't at any point check on him, like imagine if she had put some make up on and asked if he wanted to have a little fun in half an hour, he probably could have even adjusted some timings around or something, but she's like "this is it for the month come over rn", that's not working on a relationship!
there's something about families that feel they were robbed of their ultra masculine son and pull shit like this.
I love when these drop during work hours
GIVE THE MAN 10 MINUTES TO SAY GOODBYE TO THE BOYS
This episode was a WHIRLWIND.
On today's episode, we learn Jordan is a terrible friend!
Thanks papa big J, love you lots!
Oh week 14 without a George santos guest appearance
1. Correct
2. Correct
3. Correct
Bottle Night mentioned: 4 episodes (one on patreon)
see ya next time :)
Hearing joseph say the F slur feel so surreal after he censors himself so much on stream
It reminds me of hearing my teachers swear for the first time
I learned a lot about straight people this episode, I think too much lol
The difference is that YOU wanted to have sex Peeps, the guy didn't as much as whatever else they were doing.
There is NO OBLIGATION to have sex, there is no obligation if you are a man nor a woman, the idea that sex is this amazing thing that is better than everything else is stupid and forced by society (and advertisement).
The examples that Joseph did were trying to force the same thing, to ask to give up something YOU WANT MORE than sex, and in that case you have zero obligations to say yes, that's the point. You say yes because you want to, it's not a valid argument
Damn, this is what I wanted to say but couldn’t piece it together in words. You’re allowed to not regard sex as something so important that you’d fuck over 7 other people for it. Even if I wasn’t getting it as frequently, if I’m not in the mood for it and it’s not the right time, it’s simply not the right time. It’s not the only way to be intimate with your partner.
The second one is tough. And i think people need to hear this even if they don't like it : our body, our life is precious and we don't have the duty to sacrifice it in any kind of way to someone, even a relative.
This sounds selfish, and it is, but we have the right to be selfish to some extent. This guys doesn't have to give up anything to save his sister especially if his sister didn't give a F about him. And no one should make him feel bad about it.
Because not everyone is a selfless savior who would do anything to save someone, even someone we know, and that's fine.
And that's why those who give up on organs, blood or risks their lives for other are true heroes. Because those selfess act aren't and shouldn't be taken for granted.
I think in that situation I would have said the same thing then definitely reconsidered it because I am way too willing to write blank cheques for people. I think that's what I'd do but I think if I agreed to it that would be the wrong decision.
On #3, when you're drive is cold, don't do surprises! If things heat up for you, communicate!
im super late but this one is so insanely good bc, to me, it really tests how broadly you can see a relationship web.
there's like 7 other people and, regardless of how dignified you see the hobby, their time is also worth respecting! it's a pre-planned activity and these are adults who have to schedule things. being put in a position where you gotta tell em to fuck off is, in fact, unfair! being the guy and realizing "piss them off or piss me off" is an ultimatum that is now a factor is nerve-wracking! i wouldn't want that in a relationship!
she's not a Female Manipulator or whatever, it's the one-two punch of bottling up her feelings (positive and negative) coupled with not really understanding the position she put him in that makes me feel bad! she doesn't deserve to hurt herself like that, she put herself in a super vulnerable position in a way that she did not have to! it sucks, but you can only realize that if you get past the idea that any given hobby has a respectability threshold required in order to be deemed worthy of respect!
This coming out on Fridays means that my Friday night midnight reports hare made SO much nicer.
The second story messes with me so much. I cannot imagine either having someone i despise that much or cutting my family off. I cannot imagine leaving my sister like that, but I cannot picture her doing something that would hurt me so. This one is very hard to judge.
For the runescape story I dont think either are the asshole. I think it's hard for people to conceptualize what it means to be doing a coordinated thing in a video game with people online if they have not actually done it, for example peeps. If you think about it as like playing a game of basketball with friends at the gym or a board game at someones house where you are in a physical space together I think it's a bit easier to understand. So since it's so common for people to fail to understand that dynamic I think it's fine for a misunderstanding about it to happen once but the couple should sit down and talk about why it happened and why him not leaving in the middle of what they are doing is important etiquette.
As a woman with a rock bottom sex drive, it is really hard to put yourself in the mood. I think its understandable to be upset if you get rejected, even just for a little bit, because its a lot of work for me to get in that headspace, and it takes active effort to maintain. That being said, the boyfriend is absolutely not an asshole either. I used to raid lead in World of Warcraft, and having to find a random to fill the slot one of your usuals takes sucks, but it is possible. There are plenty of people running whatever content you want to do in these types of games, and you can find one to take someones place.
I think that, if this is a known issue that they've talked about, he should know that its a big deal that she is in the mood, and he should capitalize on it asap since she is making this effort *for him*. Ive been on both sides of this type of problem before, and it sucks for both of em. She isnt obligated to stay worked up, and he isnt obligated to drop his game. There really isnt anyone 'in the wrong' here.
Man the second one is rough. The fact that he bullied him in high school sucks, and if that was it it'd be an easy get over it you gotta get tested. But he's unrepentant, and his sister and dad both went haha yeah homophobia is funny, and no efforts were made to ever apologize or make ammends, which really pushes it to be much closer to wether he owes her or not. The fact is, I don't think he owes them anything and maybe if he did get tested and 8t was a match, maybe he has an in but also maybe he doesn't! Maybe he sacrifices so much and they turn it around on him to get over being insulted and belittled to try and get him back in the family and it sucks. These people showed you that they Do Not Care About You, and you can't give everything to people that wouldn't help you.
#3 is so contextual. If it were just a gamer gooner grinding league solo queue or whatever, obviously she's NTA.
But she's putting forward a situation where he's forced to choose between a group of people that he presumably also cares about at least a bit and her. And even then, he still chooses her, but does the bare minimum for his friends to not completely ruin their night.
If you can't even do for your SO the courtesy of coming in and saying "Hey, I'm gonna go get dolled up, don't get too involved," which is STILL being spontaneous for him, then I don't understand you.
Jordan, who's normally so on the mark with the "communicate with your freakin partner" angle, completely whiffed on this one.
I initially read the title as "it's me or the piss" for some reason.
That's the next episode
God forbid men store a few piss bottles under the bed
They pretty much got there with the discussion
For the third post, I have to disagree with Joseph and Danny saying the poster is the asshole. To preface, I think the bf was well within his right to choose the game over sex. I raid with a group in FFXIV, and regularly make scheduled plans with other friends to play games; I know how important it is to not flake on your friends.
That being said, I feel for the girlfriend. Sex and the frequency at which she and her bf have it is starting to become an issue for their relationship, mainly because of her own lack of sex drive. They've even come to an agreement that if she wasn't 100% against having sex, she would put in effort to try and get in the mood. That is a not an insignificant amount of commitment on her part.
So one day, against all odds, she finds it in herself to plan a night of sex for the two of them. Unfortunately, he was already committed to doing something, which derailed her plan, and it took her out of the mood for sex.
Now, I do think what she said was pretty mean in the context of their relationship (as far as we know), saying that he lost his chance at sex for picking the game over her. But I can understand why she feels hurt, and I can't fault her for feeling that way. She made an effort to try and take a step in resolving a problem in their relationship, and she feels like her effort was in vain.
Idk, she clearly felt bad for how the night ended up, and I don't have it in me to call her "the asshole" for trying to put in effort in their relationship, and being disappointed in the result her effort had brought.
Yeah exactly, it's not just a "sex over plans with your friends", their relationship has problems and they decided to kinda try and work on them together.
I think people are putting too much weight on the label of "asshole". Someone can act like an asshole in a situation and not be an irredeemable bastard. And besides all that, the podcast's entire gimmick is definitely deciding if someone is "the asshole", so the title has even less value when they're committed to not labeling a middle ground.
58:00 holy shit danny was cooking this entire episode my god!
When communication doesn't exist and you don't how to function in a social settings
Maybe I'm a bit naive, dumb, young and moralistic but for the second post (if I was in the same situation) I'd still donate my kidney, I don't want to spend my time trying to balance on a scale how much someone made me suffer/are insensitive and the risk for the life of someone I know (he said they are strangers now, but I feel like with family there's always a small connection, it just doesn't disappear).
It feels as if I'm sentencing the sister to death and I just think there is no action on earth that warrants killing another person in retaliation (except some self defense cases). I'd not even do it because I want to make my family in my debt, or to try and because I want to make them change their mind about me I'd just want to do it because it feels right.
I don't like the mentality that "you don't owe anyone anything" because it just gets you nowhere, it's important to protect your peace but there's no point in protecting it if you can't also help others and do good deeds.
That said I don't blame op one bit for feeling conflicted and even refusing this, I just wanted to express how I'd act in that situation (hypotetically ofc, who knows if I could follow through if this really happened).
First story, He tried to make a conversation, She deflected in a non rude way because she is working, And at that point, he should have said, "Sorry! I'll have an XYZ" and fucking leave it. She turned him down, both on having a conversation and anything further, and trying to bull through that is Rude!
EXACTLY. As someone who works retail, I know for myself, a lot of times I just want the retail npc dialogue with customers and move on. I don't want to have a conversation with someone. Sometimes I'll have a conversation with regulars I see a lot, but random customers, I just want to get through the interaction as quick as possible. She's at work, her mind is set on work and doesn't want to have non-work conversations with customers, completely valid!
I can understand if you have poor grasp on social cues not catching the first hint and needing the second hint, but after that the guys "well I don't want anything anymore!" is just indefensible
Girl did not want a better tip it seems. Like five words followed by the request for an order would have both ensured business and very likely a larger tip. It sort feels like there was more going on for her than a dude trying to show interest in an apparently shared hobby.
I dunno. I feel like he wasn't in the wrong. A bit of childish when he didn't get the message to storm off. But you're in a service industry, social skills go a long way.
@@raze667 Well nobody gives tips to cashiers. Those tip jars are always empty
@@raze667 here's the thing tho, she's probably had to deal with guys like so many times already, she knows why he's asking about the tattoo. It's not because he's genuinely interested in the tattoo, it's to hit on her. He's not gonna tip her in the first place. he made it clear that he thought she was cute and wanted to hit on her. She's at work, so she didn't want to get hit on at work and shut that shit down immediately
11:38 “Champing at the bit” ftfy. You’re welcome
I told him months ago, he knows and does not care lol
Story 3 feels so insane to me. Why respond like that when your expectations weren't met? OP even claimed that her libido was becoming a problem. Go get help then.
I see a few people saying that the barista in the first story is rude for not responding to the question and i disagree. I think not responding to the question and just being in customer service npc mode is completely valid. Maybe its just me, but in the years I've worked retail, I've just learned that i don't really want to engage with customers most of the time and want to get through a customer interaction as fast as possible most of the time. We dont know if the barista is having a bad day, or has had a bunch of people hit on her with that exact line, so she just doesn't engage with that conversation. I think in a work place setting, if you dont want small talk, its completely valid to ignore questions not related to your job.
Yeah like him asking in the first place isn't a problem and her brushing it off going NPC mode also isn't a problem. Man should have taken the hint she wasn't in a mood to talk with customers more than she had to.
Episode title should've been ' KIDNEYS FOR NOTHING AMD YOU KICKS FOR FREE"
this episode has a lot of quips. saving 52:30
Peeps is never beating the himbo allegations 😂
Runescape players would never understand someone getting up for sex because they don't know what it is. ba dmm tss
The third story highlights an issue that always comes up with Reddit react content, which is that this story is so obviously fake I can’t get into the discussion
I Quite literally have refused sex with my GF because i was raiding and, while my friends give me shit about it to this day, we used to raid far less frequently than my gf and I had sex. I stand with gamers
If I ever see someone working and they have a cool tattoo I just go "Hey, love the ink" and move on with my life or order my whatever. It's not that hard. I think the only time I inquired more into something about someone while working was when their phone rang and Sodo Chi No Sadame was playing and I love the intro to the song and inquired what the song was from because it sounded cool.
runescape story in a nutshell:
husband: "let's have sex"
wife: "sorry babe, i'm not in the mood, and rarely will be"
husband: "that's unfortunate, but i understand"
wife: "let's have sex"
husband: "sounds great, just give me 15 minutes"
wife: "never mind, you lost your chance"
wife just comes off as self-centered and narcissistic frankly.
relax, she's not narcissistic. going through that much effort and getting rejected feels like shit. she obviously shouldnt have gotten upset at him and given him the cold shoulder. that doesn't make her a narcissist. just a human whose feelings got hurt and reacted poorly.
@@entius6843
sure, she's probably not an actual narcissist and i don't think she's a bad person, but her response in that moment was extremely childish and self-centered.
also, she didn't even get rejected. he asked her to wait 15 minutes.
On the last one neither one is the asshole. The guy isn´t the asshole because he shows loyalty to his friends, while the wife isn´t the asshole for acting in the way they agreed on. Remember they agreed on not having s** when she isn´t in the mood. If him gaming in that moment turned her off then it is what it is.
My impression of this discussion was that Dany and Joseph immediatly jumped on the train that she doesn´t want to have s** with him anymore because she wants to punish him, while I didn´t get that impression at all when hearing the text of the OP.
I get that getting put on hold can feel jarring enough to derail your mood.
It´s not her fault for not being able to be horny for extended periods of time, when her s**drive is relatively low anyway.
Tldr I dont think either of them is the asshole here, it was just unfortunate that the cicumstances turned out the way that they did.
Double standard on 3 story too, guy is expected to drop everything and have sex when she wants it? Smh
The first one is so fucking relatable for me. I hate when customers try to start conversations with me in general, and the very few times people were flirting with me while also doing that ended up pissing me off tenfold. Take the hint. Stop fucking talking to me.
I'm all for simping for Danny, but the final round of a YCS is not equivalent to a big raid in an MMORPG. They're share some surface level similarities if you glance over it, but it isnt a comparison that can be made without changing the wieght of the situation
Yeah ducking out of the final round of a YCS doesn't inconvenience anyone, they hand the win to the other guy and move on. If anything it's more convenient for the tournament cause there's no chance you'll go to time and keep people waiting.
Regarding the kidney post: joseph said something along the lines of "shortening your lifespan for your sister". That is not true. Kidney donations don't affect life expectancy. Donating a kidney is actually a low risk surgical procedure. That is to say, it's a surgery with complications as every surgery. But as far as surgeries go it's pretty safe and the complications of it are rare.
Don't spread medical misinformation lmao.
I honestly can't believe how wrong all three of them were on that last one. The couple talked about what they could do about this ongoing issue, and agreed that she would put in more work to get herself there when she can. That's EXACTLY what she did. I don't even blame him at all, he was trying to be considerate of all the people he made plans with and thought the delay would be fine, but when it turns out not to be, that's not her fault.
She didn't actively decide to "be that kind of partner", this is something they both know she's struggled with and she put her best foot forward. She didn't say "now or never", but the delay left her feeling unwanted and physically uncomfortable and that killed the mood. The remark she made was petty, but I overwhelmingly feel like neither person really did anything wrong here.
I'm still in the middle of hearing it, did they really argue either of them was fully in the wrong? WTF?
Like, that situation happening is profoundly unfortunate, but it is just that: unfortunate.
Both were willing to take the moment, but neither of them were prepared for it and the moment was lost. That's literally it. Trying to misconstrue that either of them didn't want to put forth the effort for the other is wrong.
Edit: ok, hearing a bit of it again, there was one thing she did that is actually being the asshole, namely saying he lost his shot for what he did. Which was trying to clear the time he had coordinated for a time-consuming activity that requires group participation to even be done. That was the one asshole-ish thing she did, but it was understandable.
and the guy chose to be an understanding partner despite the situation. when he's in the mood and she's not, he understands and tried to find a solution. when she was in the mood, he simply asked for 15 minutes and she shut down completely. regardless of her not deciding to "be that kind of partner," that response is completely self-centered.
I do feel for her specifically because of the loss of a sex drive. That can be devastating, especially if the couple does want to have a sexual relationship, but at the same time, sometimes it can be tough to plan video game hangout/raids with friends if you have differing work schedules and the only time you can do said raid is a day you have off of work, so I also understand it being tough to drop everything to have sex. It could've been something he and his friends were looking forward to a lot. I think somethings she said do kinda make her an asshole, but ultimately, I don't think either are fully assholes.
yeah no as much as i do agree the guy is fine for not leaving the raid i can't help but feel for the gf in this situation tbh. i dont think she's an asshole for not being in the mood anymore after that and maybe shes a bit petty but its understandable after going through all that. i get why they dont do nah or esh calls but this really just feel like two people having a small misunderstanding.
tldr: i am a misandrist i hate gamers
@@tweekin7outI don’t think it is at all, she was upset, as you would be given this is a problem in their relationship, and she lashed out. If you’re in her position, lying there waiting and probably thinking “he’s choosing a game over me” even if you know that’s not really true it can be hard not to feel hurt
I feel like everyone's blowing the third story out of proportion, it's one singular time regarding something she's had a conversation about feeling bad she has no control over. I have not played any game with any friends (mmo, multiplayer or tabletop) who wouldn't have understood that "Hey guys, nothing is seriously wrong but I need to go spend time with my GF" is something that happens from time to time. They may be a bit miffed in the short term, but it's one night. We'll all move on.
If it were a consistent issue then sure, she's just arguably getting into manipulative territory and it needs to be addressed. But it's one single session that you're dropping for the health of your relationship. And you can even follow it up with a conversation about timing, and just... a little bit of warning, as it does seem like her major failing was not implying they should do something after dinner
Nah wtf are danny and joseph on for the third post? Having low sex drive isn't about being manipulative, it's not something that a person wants to dangle over someone's head, it fucking sucks that you just don't/can't do it as much as your partner and it eats away at you, you feel like shit because you feel like you're wrong just for being who you are for feeling something normal (which is not wanting to have sex). And the partner imo should absolutely try to take his chances whenever the girlfriend feels into it.
An analogy for me is my knee pain, I've tried to work on it but 3 out of every 4 workouts I just can't do legs because my knee kills me, so whenever I have a good kneee day I just try to have the best training session I can (even if I'm tired or would be a little late for something afterwards). I love training legs and it fucking suck that I don't get to do it as often as I would want to, but because of that I just need to make the most out of the good chances, you can't let those slip by if it's something you care about
I agree with Jordan. If a wife or girlfriend is going to put in that kind of effort to make you happy I would jump out too.
The thing I don't agree with is her negative reaction, but in the same way she was devastated by his choice because he chose a game over his significant other.
I think that was what he was trying to say tbh
45:40 story 3…. Naw I would drop that raid so fast 😂…. No shot his friends wouldn’t understand
She made a really strong effort she didn’t just walk up and say “let’s have sex”
Edit: nah y’all are moving the goal posts: it is a game not something else, it will be there, he can be interchanged, and his raid partners will understand if they are his friends and if they aren’t well who cares?
What Joseph was doing was changing the scenario to something Jordan values than sex, like how the guy in scenario 3 valued the raid. It’s not about it being a game but more about the unreasonable response to a surprise not working out. I’ve been in the situation of the friends and have literally been kicked out from a friends house during a time we’re hanging out because his wife wanted to be with him, and it sucks.
Nah I'm with Peeps. You can always reschedule the raid to a different day, and your partner should be a higher priority than a video game.
Most anti-social people ever.
number 2 was 100% correct though
Jesus christ can people not just...have a conversation in public
For the first time ever i actually agree with Jordan's take on this podcast, i agree with him on the third story, just put the game down and have sex with your partner.
If you think runescape is more of a priority than spending time being intimate with someone you love then you're just wrong.
As if you don't have any sort of obligation to all the people you've made plans with?
I'm sorry to say, but you all missed the mark here on the third one.
That woman needs to end that relationship. They clearly are not sexually compatible, AND the guy doesn't seem to understand that her needs, while infrequent, need to be met.
This lack of getting it is why he doesn't get any I'm not in the mood for sex here's a little head and handy
But also, if you are in a position where you don't want to have sex with your partner more than once a month, you probably aren't sexually attracted to them.
love it when people just infer shit into a situation. I actually think he's sexually abusing her by asking and she should call the police.
I love my partner with all my heart and think she's physically immaculate. I have a low libido, so we maybe have sex once every two months. I still take care of her and make sure she's satisfied, but people are just wired differently. Sex just isn't that appealing to me. Don't assume things about others you know nothing about.
>the guy doesn't seem to understand that her needs, while infrequent, need to be met
what about his needs? she's not meeting his needs, but he's not trying to end the relationship, he's trying to work through it. obviously he's not happy about the lack of sex, but at least he's understanding about the situation.
however, the moment she's in the mood, he has to drop everything? what if he wasn't in the mood?
The guy is in no way at fault here. I know its a hack bit to say "what if the genders were swapped?", but if the girl was chatting with her friends on the phone and the guy walked in with bow on his cock and said "babe i'd like my monthly draining NOW" and then he got pissy that she didnt immediately hang up on her friends you would RIGHTFULLY call him an asshole. How is this any different. Also, what if he's not in the mood, does sex ONLY matter when it on her terms exactly and not BOTH of their terms? A
Also, the reason that he doesn't get any "head and handy" Is because HE refuses, he doesn't want to engage unless she ALSO 100% wants it. You are just making up reasons to blame him.
Edit 2: Alright fine. I was off a doinky when i wrote the first part. I'm just being hyperbolic and I'm sorry if my "charged language" rubbed anyone the wrong way. I'll leave it up for posterity sake. The guy asked a super innocuous question and deserves basic human respect of not being ignored. If it was two guys, two girls, a dude and a nonbinary person; if they acted the way she did, they'd still be rude. I don't think they deserves death by firing squad, but to act like she did nothing wrong is dumb. There's days we're all rude; that doesn't make it okay. The dude's obviously a freak for how he responded.
The lady was being a bitch in the first story. She got a niche interest tattooed on a visible part of her body, this is her penance. Completely ignoring his question is just rude. Of course, he's an asshole for how he reacted, but would it have killed her to say "I really like Kilua. How can I help you today?" then if he pushed it to be curt with him.
In the third story, this is the gambit you run when you surprise someone. They won't always be receptive to that surprise. Her teasing him throughout the day would have been way hotter, or even mentioning something to him before she got dressed up so he could wrap up anything and get ready. A Runescape raid is 20-40 people, organizing something like that is such a monumental feat and one person leaving during the raid fucks everything up. No matter if it's stupid because "videogames", this is something important to him. She could've even made it a thing, tease him during the raid or something, have some fun.
No "penance" is deserved from making a choice with one's own body/appearance, least of all one extracted from your employment and unwanted attention from customers.
@spectralphantom380 If you don't want people to comment on the thing YOU choose to show the world, cover it up. "God, I hate it when people comment on my burger t-shirt" as I put on my burger t-shirt.
If you don't want attention from customers, don't have a customer-facing job. He was just making conversation with another human. She responded rudely. He also responded rudely.
@@entius6843have you ever worked a service industry job? If you haven't, you have to deal with this kind of shit often. She's probably gotten comments like that a lot and just doesn't want to have a conversation about it at work. She didn't get the tattoo for people to comment on the tattoo, she got the tattoo because it's something she enjoys and wants as a tattoo. Some people want to be strictly professional at work and not have conversations about stuff outside of work. I've worked retail my entire adult life and there are some days where I genuinely don't want to interact with customers outside the basic retail npc dialogue. Sometimes I enjoy the tattoo compliments, other times, I just want the interaction to end as fast as possible so I don't really acknowledge it. To call her a bitch for not entertaining a conversation while he's at work is telling of what kind of person you are
@@entius6843 Assuming she wasn't in the mood to talk about it, I think her response is curt, but reasonable. "Bitch" is definitely extreme. Like the alternative, "thanks, but I'm not in the mood to chat right now" is maybe sliiiightly more polite but not by much. You're suggesting that all people in customer service roles should HAVE to make small talk with their customers or they're assholes, which I don't really think is true.
Ah yes, as we all know people with customer-facing jobs overwhelmingly get them for the love of the game rather than some kind of economic necessity.