Be Needed, But Don’t Be Needy

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  • Опубліковано 15 вер 2023
  • Just exploring the concept of men learning to be less needy while being available for those in need
    Visit our store at ;
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    We have a podcast! You can access it anywhere that you normally listen to your podcasts. You’ll find it under Dry Creek Wrangler Podcast.
    Momma has her channel, and I encourage you to go over and check it out. Here is the link.
    / @drycreekmomma
    You can visit our website here:
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,3 тис.

  • @DryCreekWranglerSchool
    @DryCreekWranglerSchool  8 місяців тому +85

    The zippo’s are now up on the Shopify store, and here is the link - dry-creek-wrangler-school.myshopify.com/

    • @oldblood_eyes
      @oldblood_eyes 8 місяців тому +1

      just bought one. hell yeah!

    • @TheBootyWrangler
      @TheBootyWrangler 8 місяців тому +1

      Well fuck me man I legit just got into my vintage lighter addiction/obsession all started by an old zippo I bought off eBay. You got me brother. Well you got my wallet that is.
      Also just wanted to let you know adding a cigar to my hemp time on Friday nights before I head home has really done wonders for taking the stress of the week off my shoulders so that when I get home I’m very relaxed and capable of handling the craziness of being a young married father. It’s incredible how much of a relaxing effect the simple act has on the soul.

    • @davidfoster5813
      @davidfoster5813 8 місяців тому

      Yeah I've been watching the videos when I can I've been real busy this summer I just wanted to say I love you guys and I'll try to get caught up LOL❤

    • @ryanbelaus4000
      @ryanbelaus4000 8 місяців тому

      I don't need a lighter

    • @SaarLeestMee
      @SaarLeestMee 8 місяців тому

      Man huge collector i have some nice ones. Thanks for the tips ❤

  • @hensen5309
    @hensen5309 8 місяців тому +2070

    My gymnastics coach told me when I was young “even if you have the money, live like a pauper. Every time you want the milkshake, get the water. The milkshake will come later, for now the water is fine. I never really understood him until he was already passed away and I got a little older. Thank you for reminding me of the lessons that have kind of become sun faded from time. God bless everyone here.

    • @davidm1149
      @davidm1149 8 місяців тому +31

      I learned later to drink the water, but lesson learned thank God.

    • @LClaypool
      @LClaypool 8 місяців тому +17

      How's life man? The job? Got a new lady yet? Was reading my old comments and saw yours. Then saw you again in this thread. Hope your well man.

    • @Phantom-ez4zv
      @Phantom-ez4zv 8 місяців тому +12

      whats wrong with a milkshake, sometimes a milkshake you need more than water, if you are hungry for a fullday a milkshake is better option.

    • @wat5513
      @wat5513 8 місяців тому

      Handle/nick pic doesn't checkout =) =/.

    • @chrisd5774
      @chrisd5774 8 місяців тому +25

      Half good advice. Have the milkshake, just don't have five a day

  • @horsehelping
    @horsehelping 8 місяців тому +505

    I'm a 17 year old girl i know that most of your videos are for young men but i have taken some of your advice and applied it to my life and it has helped me and a lot of different ways and i just wanted to thank you sir and god bless

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @rRekko
      @rRekko 8 місяців тому +11

      That's okay, that's what happens when people get married too, we learn from each other a little bit and help each other.
      Also, a dad will usually give his own advice as a man to their kids, be it daughter or son, and a mom will give their advice as a woman to her kids too.

    • @Thewindwhispers.
      @Thewindwhispers. 7 місяців тому +15

      Advice is advice. If it works it works. Meditation is good.

    • @xoxoakouto
      @xoxoakouto 6 місяців тому +7

      Age doesn’t matter, sister! If this helps you. It helps you. :)

    • @ayara8157
      @ayara8157 6 місяців тому +9

      Good for you sweetheart! I wish I came across a guy like this when I was your age. Live well and never stop learning!

  • @inmyownstateofmind144
    @inmyownstateofmind144 8 місяців тому +130

    "The man's ability to shrug and walk away is a man's greatest ability. "

  • @user-yb3yt6ee5s
    @user-yb3yt6ee5s 8 місяців тому +360

    Can't beat the old school life lessons. Please keep making these videos!

  • @WtmGamingVids
    @WtmGamingVids 8 місяців тому +992

    I honestly think Dwayne has the best life advice. These videos always seem to pop up right as I'm going through stuff and the way he explains stuff is so helpful.

    • @slowjamcdub
      @slowjamcdub 8 місяців тому +7

      That’s right!!!! Don’t NOT comply!!!!!!!! 💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸

    • @ChrisSMurphy1
      @ChrisSMurphy1 8 місяців тому +2

      @@slowjamcdubDon’t not comply? A reminder 1,000,000 plus Americans died of covid…a good reminder then fix your grammar

    • @the_expidition427
      @the_expidition427 8 місяців тому +7

      @@ChrisSMurphy1 That was going to happen either way I would let you know to fix punctuation except it would be petty to go over semantics

    • @ruck27
      @ruck27 8 місяців тому +11

      @@ChrisSMurphy1it’s been proven now, doing nothing and carrying on as normal would have done less damage then all the mandates. Like the Swiss. Cheers

    • @AMZNFBA
      @AMZNFBA 8 місяців тому

      You go through stuff quite often I would say! maybe a therapist?

  • @jakeplissken9991
    @jakeplissken9991 8 місяців тому +513

    The most wholesome man on the internet. Salute, Dwayne!

    • @imSincerePromise
      @imSincerePromise 8 місяців тому +3

      Stop

    • @jakeplissken9991
      @jakeplissken9991 8 місяців тому

      @@imSincerePromise K

    • @imSincerePromise
      @imSincerePromise 8 місяців тому +1

      @@jakeplissken9991 thank you

    • @staytrue5307
      @staytrue5307 8 місяців тому

      ​@@imSincerePromise🤡

    • @arlenecoury9976
      @arlenecoury9976 8 місяців тому +4

      He reminds me of how the pioneers must have thought, BEFORE we became a modern civilization, and have basically "brain washed" into believing so much garbage.

  • @gregholland11
    @gregholland11 8 місяців тому +230

    Quick correction: on a plane your instructed to put your OWN mask on first, then help others. You need to make sure you’re safe before you try to help others. If you pass out from oxygen deprivation while putting a mask on your 2 kids, they probably won’t be able to save you. If you get your own mask on first, then you can put a mask on someone else even if they passed out

    • @thecapone45
      @thecapone45 8 місяців тому +23

      I noticed the same thing. Yeah, I’ve never been on a plane but indeed you put your mask on first. Only then can you be certain that you’ll be able to help your children and not risk passing out and hope someone else can rescue your children.

    • @ec1628
      @ec1628 8 місяців тому +4

      Correct

    • @JAMESLAFaette
      @JAMESLAFaette 8 місяців тому +11

      In a sense reality fits better to his statement as you need to put yourself in a situation where you don’t need before you can help others.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @OlSmokey304
      @OlSmokey304 8 місяців тому

      @@learn2farm509 I'm gonna say you don't understand how hypoxia affects the body. nor how subtle and difficult it can be to recognize the symptoms before it's too late.
      ua-cam.com/video/UN3W4d-5RPo/v-deo.html&ab_channel=ChristopherCummings
      one of the more common symptoms is euphoria.

  • @nikolaischneider8229
    @nikolaischneider8229 8 місяців тому +342

    I'm 17 years old. I started to take control over my life two months ago. I always didn't get why I was depressed. As soon as I started taking responsibility and reading the bible I found your UA-cam channel. I only have watched a few videos but they have helped me to understand many things in a better way. And I want to thank you for that.
    Edit: I'm doing way better than a few months ago.
    (In case there are some grammar issues or spelling mistakes: I'm sorry English isn't my first language)

    • @edboy3644
      @edboy3644 8 місяців тому +19

      I'm glad, you're still young and many folk don't realize this till later in life. Happy for you keep strong ok

    • @movingamountain
      @movingamountain 8 місяців тому +9

      That’s awesome. I’m encouraged by young men like you. You will be a great leader if you stay on the path you’re on.

    • @inmyownstateofmind144
      @inmyownstateofmind144 8 місяців тому +7

      You sir! Yous finnin to do some big thangs out there in this here, world boi!

    • @inmyownstateofmind144
      @inmyownstateofmind144 8 місяців тому +4

      English is my first language. I'm just being a dip shit. But no seriously my grammar is trash but keep it big dawg you might change the world one day pimpin!

    • @fairoadiary
      @fairoadiary 8 місяців тому +4

      glad you’ve been finding the light! you’re way too young to be feeling depressed no one deserves that

  • @elysianfields1671
    @elysianfields1671 8 місяців тому +306

    You should be dependable, but never dependent. You should be needed by other people, but need them as little as possible.

    • @berwynsigns4115
      @berwynsigns4115 8 місяців тому +84

      Key word as little as possible. Not 0, that's impossible. We will always need others, because we aren't God.

    • @slowjamcdub
      @slowjamcdub 8 місяців тому +5

      That’s right!!!! Don’t NOT comply!!!!!!!! 💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸

    • @allahalkareem8055
      @allahalkareem8055 8 місяців тому +6

      You are made in the IMAGE of God though, consider that..
      @berwynsigns4115

    • @jqy4sho
      @jqy4sho 8 місяців тому +1

      @@allahalkareem8055Ohh we forgot tht

    • @smokingcrab2290
      @smokingcrab2290 8 місяців тому +3

      Heres the thing though. When he said he doesn't need his wife. God designed male and female to meet one another's needs. God saw Adam was lonely so he took Adam's flesh and made a woman to fulfill his needs. We have a need for connecting. For sex. For love. Etc. So when you say you don't "need" anyone, you're lying to yourself and you will be miserable. You can't control others. But that doesn't stop you from having needs. And if the person you're with won't recognize your needs then maybe they don't really love you. You see, all relationships are about how you make watch other feel and what you do for each other. There are no one sided relationships that survive. That's called toxicity. Even economics proves this. Capitalism itself is literally the most popular system in the world because of the concept of "you scratch my back, I scratch yours". It's so sinple and easy. But the problem is typically you meet too many people who neglect you, so you think you're forced to adopt this mentality of "i dont need anyone". Okay tough guy. Be alone. Desire nothing. Don't care about anything or anyone. Don't ask for anything. Be miserable. I don't care. You do you.

  • @sawyer4981
    @sawyer4981 8 місяців тому +248

    I learned a lot about needs vs wants when I got laid off during the pandemic. People's behavior since then has lead me to cut even more things out of my life. We're a lot more resilient than we think we are. You just have to not think about it.

    • @thecapone45
      @thecapone45 8 місяців тому +11

      I am currently jobless (by choice) and it’s made me (as a single man with no wife and kids) rethink what even some of the well known financial advisors have said. You actually don’t need that much at all. I personally have my freezer and pantry stocked and because it’s just me, it’s lasted me all month and I’ve still got so much more. I don’t need $30,000 a year. I used to easily spend $1K-$4K a month depending on what I was doing (and that was me living cheap!) and since I stopped working I’ve spent less than $500.. There’s so much you learn you don’t need.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @Spliter546
      @Spliter546 3 місяці тому

      Wow! This is great advice

  • @conundrum2u
    @conundrum2u 8 місяців тому +162

    The semantics of want and need don't hit home until you've lost someone that you've dedicated your entire life with/to. Men, a lot of the time, don't know we needed someone in our lives until they're gone. It's sad that people these days say "I don't need a man" or a woman. Of course you can exist as a person without someone. That's being an adult. There's also a difference between healthy and unhealthy attachment. You can want someone to be in your life and that's great, but true companionship means you've crossed that line from optional co-habitation to being intertwined on a spiritual or psychological level. That's when you make each other better than who you are as individuals. Need isn't an ugly word, it should be an expression of commitment.

    • @johnprice867
      @johnprice867 8 місяців тому +5

      Agreed!

    • @DryCreekWranglerSchool
      @DryCreekWranglerSchool  8 місяців тому +18

      @PeterGoesINya Dewayne understands perfectly what is coming out of his mouth. Dewayne also recognizes a pseudo pop-psychologist who is happy to get online and give a frivolous pop diagnosis of someone that they do not even know. Something a knowledgeable pro would never do.

    • @BoldJonathan
      @BoldJonathan 8 місяців тому +5

      @@DryCreekWranglerSchool amen and amen I say! Tell Dewayne us guys in Brooklyn and New York got his back! Thank you and your family for taking the time to invest in us. God bless you all!

    • @RileyPatterson-bf8ge
      @RileyPatterson-bf8ge 8 місяців тому +8

      I wouldn't say that man & woman being intertwined is "frivolous" lol. It's in the bible. You should treat your fans better. People are allowed to debate you and have their own opinions unless you wanna block everyone or turn off your comments.

    • @conundrum2u
      @conundrum2u 8 місяців тому +12

      @@RileyPatterson-bf8ge to be fair, they were responding to someone who deleted a comment that did come across as being a bit of a snap judgment/critical of Dewayne. I find Dwayne's commentaries to be thought provoking even if I don't agree 100%

  • @OPproductions22
    @OPproductions22 8 місяців тому +97

    In this age of smoke and mirrors, we “need” more positive role models like yourself to share great life advice that is very easy to understand. You’re doing god’s work Dewayne. Ten times more integral than dozens of these online personalities that I won’t even name. Thank you Dewayne.

  • @turbocobra
    @turbocobra 8 місяців тому +42

    Good stuff duane, always love your content. I got the point but I think you got the example twisted up. Flight Attendants always state to put YOUR own mask on first, then help others. The point is similar to the one your making but slightly different. The concept is, take care of your own self, and when you do that, you will be in the best position to help others.

    • @DryCreekWranglerSchool
      @DryCreekWranglerSchool  8 місяців тому +45

      Now that you pointed out, you are 100% correct. I kind of got that twisted up there.

    • @bennyc409
      @bennyc409 8 місяців тому +1

      ​@@DryCreekWranglerSchooldoesn't spoil the message mate.

    • @YawnGod
      @YawnGod 8 місяців тому +3

      Ahh, the cycle of helping continues.

  • @ahauntinglybeautifulmelody
    @ahauntinglybeautifulmelody 8 місяців тому +142

    Always a pleasure to listen to your wisdom Sir

    • @slowjamcdub
      @slowjamcdub 8 місяців тому +1

      That’s right!!!! Don’t NOT comply!!!!!!!! 💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @RebeccaSaysWords
    @RebeccaSaysWords 8 місяців тому +57

    Speaking on behalf of a clan of Idaho mountain natives here - We love your videos! You put to words concepts that we hold tight and it’s nice to hear our values out loud. Thank you 😊

  • @natestreeter6540
    @natestreeter6540 8 місяців тому +79

    I like this conversation. Wrestled with it most of my adult life as I watch my grandpa and uncles model exactly what you are saying. I do wonder if the shrinks are right though. A healthy human should go through 3 primary need stages : dependent, independent, and then interdependent.
    I think what I've realized is that my needs are the fuel for making others around me be their best. It's that atmosphere of interdependence that breeds the most wonderful thing: love.
    It can actually be selfish to not allow others to serve you, to not depend on them.

    • @StrayCatOrwell
      @StrayCatOrwell 8 місяців тому +3

      @natestreeter4560, unless bitter experience has taught you otherwise.

    • @milhouse8166
      @milhouse8166 8 місяців тому +5

      Makes sense. Everyone likes to feel needed from time to time. It adds to our purpose.

    • @kristycook6041
      @kristycook6041 8 місяців тому +2

      @@StrayCatOrwell
      So true my friend
      And yet so false at the same time
      I suppose the choice of love and hate can take up the same residence
      However, there's something about choice; about making decisions, that, somehow, proves to be a different outcome.
      Bitterness will wash away all the good within you... Little by little...'till you can scarce find yourself
      It's like a cancer that eats away all that you hold dear.
      I suppose you will probably be just Fine Stray Cat
      Nobody else has to comprehend your pain;
      Nobody else has to give you permission or approval to rise above your pain
      There are bitter experiences in life
      Many in fact
      But you got this baby
      You got this
      Don't you ever give up
      And don't you ever give up on yourself.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @raularmas1719
      @raularmas1719 3 місяці тому

      And how can a person tell whether or not they are thinking or acting independently?
      My answer: Don't always do as expected. If you have been doing as expected are you truly living your own life or are you being "lived" and actually living out other people's choices?

  • @Howdilydoodely
    @Howdilydoodely 8 місяців тому +154

    Boy did this video find me at the right time. Thank you Duane 🙏🏽

    • @hilly7645
      @hilly7645 8 місяців тому +4

      Same here !

    • @_l__86
      @_l__86 8 місяців тому +1

      bull's eye

    • @ruck27
      @ruck27 8 місяців тому +6

      They usually do somehow.

    • @slowjamcdub
      @slowjamcdub 8 місяців тому +5

      That’s right!!!! Don’t NOT comply!!!!!!!! 💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @yasinevans
    @yasinevans 8 місяців тому +86

    I rememeber typing in things like 'Advice from a Father' and 'Fatherless sons advice' and coming across your channel.
    So many of us out there that need a deep chat with a good proper man at least once a week for 20-60 minutes.
    If every young man adopted this in their life things would be a little clearer and smoother on the road ahead.
    Thank you Dewayne

  • @xnetshadowx
    @xnetshadowx 7 місяців тому +15

    I'm a 46 year old man, on the road to recovery. I watch your videos just to hear your wisdom while I'm doing house chores or indulging in my hobby, and when you shoot something that resonates, I write it down in a journal to meditate on at a later point. This is such a breath of fresh air from today's podcasts and self proclaimed male gurus, I truly feel like a father figure is speaking to me, with the same tone as a elder brother and best friend. Thank you for the time you take to share your acquired wisdom with us, know that it is helping and motivating others, ty sir.

  • @Churlz
    @Churlz 8 місяців тому +16

    I'm talking to an amazing girl right now, and I really needed this video.
    You're absolutely right. I'm doing my best to come off as not needy, but it's hard not to, since I've lived a long life without much affection.
    However, I'm really beginning to realize my self worth, and that came from within. I don't need a woman, but I want one.

  • @truth3598
    @truth3598 8 місяців тому +22

    My Dad would always say that these people are buying more house than they need. He was right and you are too. Bought a shirt, keep up your segments. Like my Dad, you're a dying breed.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @samelbamel3500
    @samelbamel3500 8 місяців тому +7

    "We quietly, self-assuredly take care of ourselves.
    And we humbly, graciously, gently take care of those around us who need to be taken care of."
    That is honestly the most noble and masculine thing I think I've heard in my life. This is worth meditating on. In fact it's worth adopting as a mantra of masculinity. Thank you Dwayne. All the best to you and yours.

    • @plaguepandemic5651
      @plaguepandemic5651 8 місяців тому +1

      20 minute long video and I happen to scroll past your comment at the instant he said this quote, what are the odds of that?

  • @JayN4GO
    @JayN4GO 8 місяців тому +13

    I’m 42 and just now getting it. Sorry it took so long but many others it takes much longer. I enjoy being needed with no return favors in mind. It makes me feel like an honest man.

    • @smokingcrab2290
      @smokingcrab2290 8 місяців тому

      It makes you feel like a provider. But here's the thing. If you want to be "needed" then all you end up doing is molding yourself to everyone else's desires while you condemn yourself as "needy" foe having your own.

    • @mingus445_gaming
      @mingus445_gaming 8 місяців тому

      @@smokingcrab2290 No

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @wildcycles1
    @wildcycles1 8 місяців тому +23

    I am right in the middle of "shrugging and walking away" from a person who often called me friend, but chose behavior that showed me otherwise. As you said, it's not easy, it's not comfortable, but I had to make a decision. This is a great video once again. Thanks for the quality content and thought provoking subjects.

  • @dalefullenkamp8001
    @dalefullenkamp8001 8 місяців тому +45

    I’ve been learning a lot the past couple months about being needed vs being needy. I’ve lost some “friends” along the way that once I realized they were just needing me and I changed my ways I haven’t heard from them. It takes so much patience but I really believe I’m becoming the man I’m supposed to be. It can be lonely being by yourself too but when I look at what I’ve accomplished on my own I think it’s just preparing me for the relationship God has in store for me.

    • @gClover61
      @gClover61 8 місяців тому +1

      W

    • @fordykid5296
      @fordykid5296 8 місяців тому +2

      In the same boat. It does get lonely but I've never had more self esteem and self-love then ever before

    • @smokingcrab2290
      @smokingcrab2290 8 місяців тому

      Yeah well if you don't need anyone then why seek a relationship at all?

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @72dodge340
    @72dodge340 8 місяців тому +34

    How is it that you always talk about what has been on my mind lately? I needed this right now. Thank you.

    • @slowjamcdub
      @slowjamcdub 8 місяців тому +2

      That’s right!!!! Don’t NOT comply!!!!!!!! 💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸💪🏻🇺🇸

    • @Stereostupid
      @Stereostupid 8 місяців тому

      Me too,it must be from above!

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @en3356
    @en3356 8 місяців тому +23

    Thank you, very few people really understand difference between “need” and “want” in relationships.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @Give_me_your_jugular
    @Give_me_your_jugular 6 місяців тому +4

    I’m 17 years old and I’ve been trying to be a better person through out of 2023, and while watching this video I realised that this is exactly how my father acts and that is how he is trying to bring me up and teach me. I’m learning how to cook, learning how to drive, learning to control my emotions, learning to think more logically rather than emotionally, learning to be independent and most important learning to be a better more nicer human just like my mother.

  • @zonefreakman
    @zonefreakman 8 місяців тому +27

    I needed this video today Dwayne. I've been trying to put myself together as a man one step at a time. Tonight I thought that I was going on a date with a woman. This would have been my first date. I felt quite a bit of anxious in anticipation for it. But tonight when we agreed the date would be she didn't show up. I messaged her and nothing. As a young man trying to put himself together, being really unsure of himself, afraid to be hopeful that things will turn out for the better, it does feel like I'm a fool. But thinking that I don't need her, that I only wanted her gives me a little perspective.

    • @junesonnier6495
      @junesonnier6495 8 місяців тому +3

      Try not to take it too hard. Easy for me to say. But when one door closes ,another one will open. Something that is meant to come your way will come , God bless you child

    • @americafirst9144
      @americafirst9144 8 місяців тому +2

      Perhaps it was just a mixup. Try not to internalize it. You sound like a fine man.

    • @magnang
      @magnang 8 місяців тому +11

      Dating as a young man is the pits. Work on yourself and be patient and don't be focused just on dating. The table is tilted towards older men who are well established.. nothing personal and there is nothing you can do to change it.
      Get your stuff, careeer and fitness together.. when you get to your late 20s early 30s you'll be swimming in it.

    • @walkingrace1233
      @walkingrace1233 8 місяців тому +11

      Her ghosting you showed you who she is. It's a character flaw and you dodged a bullet. When someone tells you who they are (actions speak louder than words), believe them..

    • @mattiej2311
      @mattiej2311 8 місяців тому +2

      Don’t worry about it. I also recently just got ghosted by someone who expressed wanting to go on a second date with me. Be thankful that you didn’t invest more of your time into her.

  • @GrekeFenris
    @GrekeFenris 8 місяців тому

    Thank you Dwayne, wise words for those willing to open their ears and really listen.

  • @lilyk4461
    @lilyk4461 2 місяці тому +2

    “The ability to shrug and walk away, is a man’s greatest ability.”

  • @Shadow298460
    @Shadow298460 8 місяців тому +14

    I'm 22 years old about to be 23, with no education and still living in South Texas, your wise insight has helped me through this year time and time again. I really appreciate you and hope your travels go well and are safe.

    • @hassanleruk8451
      @hassanleruk8451 8 місяців тому

      hey shadow i would like to talk to you

    • @lizzi437
      @lizzi437 8 місяців тому +1

      You probably have better learning than many who receive a "higher"education.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @leighfowler8973
    @leighfowler8973 8 місяців тому +5

    Dwayne, I find myself at a crossroads in life. The lady I love is either going to drive 16 hours to come and be with me and hopefully start a life together, or she's going to the other side of the country to forge her own path. The not knowing has created a tense sense of need for me and I was almost at the point of acting out in some foolish way; but this video stopped me in my tracks and put me back on my true path. Thank you so much for staying true to yours. With great respect, Leigh.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @leighfowler8973
      @leighfowler8973 8 місяців тому +5

      Update: She's not going over East and it's planning a trip up to see me. So glad I stayed true!

  • @jamesturns-jk2wm
    @jamesturns-jk2wm Місяць тому

    Thank you for spending time with us on here. You are so appreciated and loved . You are true.

  • @dhimasrasyad7475
    @dhimasrasyad7475 8 місяців тому

    Thank you, I didn’t really had similar conversation like this before. Even from my dad. You’re helping me a lot to open my view for life

  • @jared616
    @jared616 8 місяців тому +6

    Dwayne you are the man. Not to be too tender but I can see the life you've lived in your eyes alone. The wisdom you speak can only come from experience and I can't tell you how much I appreciate your message. I know you don't always like to "tread muddy water" as you call it but men everywhere (and women) need to hear it. I always look forward to a new video even though I'm not a horseman and probably never will be. Your message always rings true and comes at the perfect time. You are in touch and in tune with the world we live in today and I can't thank you enough for all that you do not only for me, but for all the young men out there that need a message like the one you deliver. Thank you sir and God bless.

  • @vwhitephotography
    @vwhitephotography 8 місяців тому +9

    Dwayne, as a young Christian woman in this difficult and confusing modern culture and time, I just want you to know how much your videos mean to me and how much listening to you gives me encouragement and the strength to keep moving forward. Thank you for doing what you're doing and for remaining strong in the midst of chaos. God bless!

    • @lorio8187
      @lorio8187 8 місяців тому

      Totally in agreement with this. These talks not only help men but women also. By the way I also love watching your wife. You two are so down to earth and real. I appreciate it!

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @50mile.entertainment
    @50mile.entertainment 8 місяців тому +2

    Bro this is hands down some of the realist advice I’ve heard in awhile ✊🏾

  • @eriklidwall1807
    @eriklidwall1807 8 місяців тому

    Thanks, I really needed to hear this and this perspective off all of it. I am going through a tough breakup. And now I look at it differently. Thank you.

  • @xerax-6344
    @xerax-6344 8 місяців тому +3

    so awesome seeing your channel doing so well, i remember when i first got recommended When You Just Aint Got It All Together it was what i imagine a good conversation with grandpa is like, thank you for kinda filling that void for me and for helping everyone else too

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @_LaRayne_
    @_LaRayne_ 8 місяців тому +1

    🙏Thank you I needed this lesson/ message. I've deff been on the struggle bus. Thank you again. You've been missed.

  • @hattmoffman90
    @hattmoffman90 2 місяці тому

    This message was very helpful this morning in regards to career.

  • @joshvaughn8364
    @joshvaughn8364 8 місяців тому +16

    This video was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you Dwayne for everything you do

  • @DaveLeary1
    @DaveLeary1 8 місяців тому +8

    I really needed to hear this message, Dewayne, been pulling myself out of a rough patch these last few months and I welcomed these words of encouragement... Keep up the good work

  • @georgeomara
    @georgeomara 2 місяці тому

    Wise words. Thank you for taking your time to share your wisdom with us. Trully appreciate it.

  • @craigtittsworth9440
    @craigtittsworth9440 8 місяців тому

    Once again brother you have a full understanding of this life and THANK YOU for always sharing your heart.

  • @cadetcadet1814
    @cadetcadet1814 8 місяців тому +5

    As a Messianic Believer I truly appreciate your sincerity and honesty when it comes to the American Christian church! The devil has twisted theology so much that the men of today look nothing like the men of scripture. As a former corrections officer, police officer, and military officer your words are spot on for young men. Keep up the good work!

  • @dylanpicard6528
    @dylanpicard6528 8 місяців тому +4

    The best advice I’ve ever gotten has always ever been from older men in my life and there’s a reason for that. They’ve had the time to go through it all and take the time to genuinely understand and appreciate everything that had came there way. This was another great one Dwayne ❤

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @IronFurball
    @IronFurball 8 місяців тому

    I'm verry grateful for your advice and perspective on things. Thanks for all the help Mr. Noel

  • @mushroomleg
    @mushroomleg 8 місяців тому +1

    One of DW’s best videos IMO. Bullet proof advice. I thank you very much.

  • @darkknightt126
    @darkknightt126 8 місяців тому +14

    Congratulations with your daughter getting married Sir. And thank you for sharing the life advance and 'wisdom'. It's kind of a therapy to listen to you.

    • @allahalkareem8055
      @allahalkareem8055 8 місяців тому

      The law of equivalent exchange is that you have to sacrifice someth8ng of equal value to obtain what you desire @darkknightt126

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @oliviamarcum3569
    @oliviamarcum3569 8 місяців тому +4

    This was deep and felt this in my soul. Great message and we need more of this for our youth. 🔥

  • @Brandon49758
    @Brandon49758 3 місяці тому

    I really appreciate your videos. They help with my anxiety.

  • @nicojira2004
    @nicojira2004 8 місяців тому

    I love this guy, he says nothing but the truth.
    I am so thankful for him telling us these advises!
    God bless you man!

  • @mattf3238
    @mattf3238 8 місяців тому +7

    Dwayne. Thank you again for sharing your wisdom. I get 100% what you are saying about helping the needy. I struggle with the ones that think they are needy but, in reality, won't pick up a paddle to steer their own ship. That is one of the true epidemics of today's society. The endless victim.

  • @Danthecameraman_
    @Danthecameraman_ 8 місяців тому +14

    Dewayne, you're a wise man preaching the gospel to build a better life for all men and women out there. God bless and thanks for the great videos

    • @stevenfoulger6066
      @stevenfoulger6066 8 місяців тому

      Not saying that I necessarily disagree with Dewayne. He has many words of earthly wisdom, but that's not the "Gospel".

    • @Danthecameraman_
      @Danthecameraman_ 8 місяців тому +1

      @@stevenfoulger6066My poor wording, didn't mean a literal gospel. His videos have helped a bunch so I was treating from a personal background. All the best.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

  • @TrashDaddy69
    @TrashDaddy69 8 місяців тому

    I needed this video Duane thank you, more men today need to hear this

  • @mrard1
    @mrard1 8 місяців тому

    I can’t wait to see you and thank you in person for all your wisdom.

  • @lovejessica
    @lovejessica 8 місяців тому +10

    I love this channel. My father taught me similar values as what you share. I carry them through life today as a woman in my own way. It’s wonderful to find a gathering of humans from all walks of life who share these values. Thank you for walking the talk and sharing it with all of us, Dwayne.

  • @Madskillsuniversity
    @Madskillsuniversity 8 місяців тому +3

    Wow, what a GREAT speech. That was really awesome, and I just hope people listen to you because you are 100% correct. At 62, I have been married for over 30 years and that's just how I have lived my life, and so has my wife. We are not needy people and I retired because I don't need to work. Real men serve and protect for sure, They also help others (all the time), walk and talk softly, but carry a big stick. LOL. Thanks for this. It made my day.

  • @antoniompieri
    @antoniompieri 7 місяців тому +1

    Dwayne, I want to express my sincere gratitude for your uplifting words. They've truly brightened my day. Sending warm greetings all the way from Brazil!

  • @one2547
    @one2547 8 місяців тому

    I love your channel and your perspective/ advice, you’ve really really helped.

  • @Johnnyo1300
    @Johnnyo1300 8 місяців тому +2

    🐶😎🐶🙏 great advice, young man, and so spot on people need to know how to stand on their own 2 feet especially men in this day and age things have changed so much since you and I were little ones my heart goes out you’re doing great work

  • @alexandrakulik9827
    @alexandrakulik9827 8 місяців тому +3

    I absolutely am grateful for you and I think you’re a beautiful human. Hoping one day I can make it out to your school to meet you ❤️

  • @christielawrence4640
    @christielawrence4640 8 місяців тому

    Thank you all there, Sir .!
    I "needed" this in order to get my self sharper.

  • @FindingDurham
    @FindingDurham 8 місяців тому

    Sage advice, as always. Thank you, Duane and Momma!

  • @harshalthapa69
    @harshalthapa69 8 місяців тому +4

    I really wish to meet people like you in real life as I can’t imagine the amount of knowledge and wisdom I’d be grasping hanging out with people like you. I’m just 17 years old a young fella from India but I really find your advices fascinating and I love to see your videos as I want to make myself better and you my sir is really playing a major part in that.

  • @coreyperkins2493
    @coreyperkins2493 8 місяців тому +5

    This goes so deep and is such a valuable lesson to learn. As I have aged I have started to see the power of need vs want. I got my first taste of this when my spouse left for another guy. I went home to my family and after a few days I walked back to my house in the pouring rain. When I got to my home and walked in the door soaking wet there was something different about me. I felt what I needed, which was a place to rest, and I had let go of needing or wanting her. I cried at times but I let go at that point. My next relationship did not work out but it was so much easier to let it go because I didn't need it anymore, it was a luxury at best. I still feel like I have a long way to go on this road but the foundation for applying rhe learning is there now. And I am thankful for it.

    • @BoldJonathan
      @BoldJonathan 8 місяців тому +2

      Keep strong and have fun. Brother I know full well the feeling as well. But there are some really good Woman out there. I would not like when Dewayne would say "have fun." But his wisdom is similar to my own Father whom is close to 70. It is important to be balanced and have fun. I now do fun things. Long as it does not hurt nobody. I am actually taking up dance lessons soon. I rode a motorcycle in a South American country with my shirt open. I did pullups at a foreign beach. I want to get into airgliding to conquer my fear of heights. Brother, as Men, I am learning to live a full life so when God bless me to find a good wife, she will become a part of my wants. Idk if that helped but Mr Dewayne and his folks got me fired up to be more Godly and stuff.

    • @coreyperkins2493
      @coreyperkins2493 8 місяців тому

      @@BoldJonathan thanks brother, I appreciate you for sharing that! 💪

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @JoyfulJenn
    @JoyfulJenn 4 місяці тому

    Hey yall hey ❤I’m here from Alexandria, Louisiana. Thanks for the channel and all the love ❤

  • @Selah1141
    @Selah1141 5 місяців тому +1

    I'm so tired of being "needed." I need, and want to be wanted. Your message is spot on!

  • @oliverpickering5066
    @oliverpickering5066 8 місяців тому +4

    A lot of this video really hit home for me, especially being able to voice that difference between needing and wanting someone. It can be challenging to explain that difference to other people in my life because when someone hears "I don't need, but I do want you" they automatically go into a defensive mode. Nowadays, I try to leave those words (need and want) out entirely and instead say "you are an important part of my life that I'd rather not live without". I think my wife and friends can appreciate that a lot more and I can too.
    Unfortunately, the airplane story didn't make as much sense to me because the actual rules of the oxygen masks are: “Should an emergency situation occur, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first, before attempting to help those around you.” However, I did understand the general message: Don't be so independent and self-serving that you become a narcissist who only cares for yourself.
    Thanks again for the awesome video!

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @chelseav8311
    @chelseav8311 8 місяців тому +3

    I needed to hear this as a woman. I'm a Christian but a weak one, battling neediness and other spiritual battles. God is merciful and I need to be kept by him and I want Him to change me. He's working. 🙏🏻

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому +1

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @gigievans395
    @gigievans395 8 місяців тому

    Thank you so much ❤! Appreciate you and family so much!

  • @talonjones2375
    @talonjones2375 8 місяців тому

    Thank you for your wisdom. I just found you today and I needed to hear this

  • @BrendanBraica
    @BrendanBraica 8 місяців тому +6

    You are the realest mf I've ever listened too. It's crazy how you always put how I feel perfectly into words. Thank you for the mental Freedom man, I'm so grateful for this channel

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @teeszu
    @teeszu 8 місяців тому +2

    Needed this video thank you. Recently I’ve lost my job and had to support my family off of 1000/mo doing landscaping with my father.
    It’s been many times I’ve had to reach out to other family members for financial help. I feel needy, yet needed.

  • @jesusmartinez1141
    @jesusmartinez1141 8 місяців тому +1

    Wow perfect timing always❗️ definitely feel like GOD is speaking through you stay blessed my brotha✨

  • @shannongreene3226
    @shannongreene3226 4 місяці тому +1

    I never had a dad growing up . I was in lots of group homes . You feel that spot. I learn so much from you I'm almost 50 and I have mental health issues that I have a hard time controlling. Thank you for feeling in that space . 🙏

  • @michaelsiemering513
    @michaelsiemering513 8 місяців тому +3

    Great advice Dewayne, hopefully someone will hear this, I'm older than you, a much needed message from what I see. Also you are correct about people in the Church, we need to understand what Jesus said about helping people. Thank you again

  • @hardluk3
    @hardluk3 8 місяців тому +4

    I don’t fly much, but every time I fly they tell you to put your own mask on first then help put the mask on others. The idea being that if you run out of oxygen then you can’t help anyone. I’m not saying I wouldn’t help my neighbor first, but that’s what they recommend.

    • @scatman8963
      @scatman8963 8 місяців тому

      yessir, but his point is sound

    • @KingYeg
      @KingYeg 7 місяців тому

      Dwayne got a bit backwards on that point. His point actually resonates with what is said. Basically have your shit in order so you can help others out.

  • @derekabrams2068
    @derekabrams2068 8 місяців тому +1

    I would like to say thank you for taking time to reach out and try to help people. I love how you are plain spoken and deal with things that go on in this world we live in. The honesty that you have about subjects is the best. If everyone would really listen to your words how all could help.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @samkirkemes0104
    @samkirkemes0104 8 місяців тому +1

    I stumbled on your channel recently and I must say as a man in the UK. I have endless respect for you good sir.
    Sending love from the UK!
    Be safe and sound as always.

  • @lauraalbertson7821
    @lauraalbertson7821 8 місяців тому +3

    I feel the same way . However, Now at 70, I realized there are not many who agree . Just as you said, We are told we have to need someone to be complete . Thank you for clearing up where that need is coming from . It’s selfish and puts a heavy burden on that other person. And as far as JESUS feels about it , I’m pretty sure He agrees with you too 👍🏼 Protect and Serve . 🕊🇺🇸🙏 You and Mamma have my support and friendship without conditions. Laura 💜🐴Bear 💜

    • @smokingcrab2290
      @smokingcrab2290 8 місяців тому +1

      If we don't need anyone then why have any relationships at all? Cut the shit dude

  • @ge9367
    @ge9367 8 місяців тому +4

    Congratulations on your daughter wedding when it comes. You should give this speech at the wedding too.

  • @NathanMulder
    @NathanMulder 8 місяців тому +2

    Thank you for this video and the message. This aligns incredibly well with my current journey.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @DeegoL9
    @DeegoL9 8 місяців тому

    Always appreciate you sharing wisdom!

  • @kevquick8598
    @kevquick8598 8 місяців тому +22

    "if the stupid people don't do stupid stuff" Good truths. 🙏✊. No to mask, no to lockdown, no to tyranny. Yes to good wholesome open folk like yall. 🤠

    • @tracyjohnson5023
      @tracyjohnson5023 8 місяців тому +1

      Yep. I will say though that imo a private business that doesn't accept government money has the right to have whatever rules they choose. Mask to enter? Fine. I won't be going through the door, but that's my choice. Kinda like no shirt, shoes, no service.
      My issue is when government makes mandates about my health, ability to travel, especially not based on facts/science.
      Personal responsibility seems to be falling by the wayside. When I decide not to mask up, that's on me and if there was truly a deadly disease killing 90% exposed that I ignore, it's probably better for everyone if I'm out of the gene pool.

    • @rancorusia
      @rancorusia 8 місяців тому +2

      poor guy scared of a mask, common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD

    • @Hanakowasright
      @Hanakowasright 4 дні тому

      There are some things that are a common good maybe not alot but some things. If there is a pandemic its in the common interest not to spread the illness.

    • @kevquick8598
      @kevquick8598 3 дні тому +1

      @@tracyjohnson5023 here here Tracy 🤝

  • @lygcdr675
    @lygcdr675 8 місяців тому +17

    Good afternoon Dwayne

  • @endermanslayer24rulz
    @endermanslayer24rulz Місяць тому +1

    This was posted a while ago, but it always seems like these videos are recommended at the exact right time for me, every single one.
    Thank you, and thank God for this deep wisdom.

  • @christopheralcantara1479
    @christopheralcantara1479 8 місяців тому +1

    I just started watching some of your videos and I want to thank you. I have been struggling really hard the last few years. They have been the worst of my life and I honestly I’m thankful for your wisdom it is helping me more than anything has the last few years.

    • @johanneshartman4618
      @johanneshartman4618 8 місяців тому

      choose JESUS CHRIST and REJECT the WORLD so come to HIM

  • @paperbackwriter...
    @paperbackwriter... 8 місяців тому +9

    Dwayne have you done a video on the feeling of loneliness but not actually being alone. What i mean is having lots of people around you but you still feel alone. Since it's something i'd like to learn about for personal experiences. Thank you and this is an amazing video have a nice day and god bless. :)

    • @ReadTheGospel
      @ReadTheGospel 8 місяців тому

      He’s got a video titled “how to deal with loneliness”. Luckily he does admit he has his wife so he can’t necessarily relate to how it is to be alone as a man in 2023 and how terrible the women these days are.

    • @SamStone1964
      @SamStone1964 8 місяців тому

      ​@@ReadTheGospelNarcissists are terrible. Not women. Not men.

  • @freshingtron21
    @freshingtron21 8 місяців тому +19

    Dwayne, if you can't look after YOURSELF, how can you be expected to look after others? On aeroplanes its fit your own mask first, before assisting others. I appreciate you man, love your videos.

  • @chouyi007
    @chouyi007 8 місяців тому

    I rarely comment on UA-cam videos, but, Partner, I had to thank you for making this one. I listen to your talks while I work, and what you say always resonates with me. This video, however, is one I will have to link to my wife, as something that she has the hardest time understanding is that what I really need from our marriage (we met when we were teenagers and I was an exchange student at her university in China) is to be needed by her. She gets hours of my talking, comforting, and emotional support every day, but she always says I’m her rock who never seems to need her back. What I am always explaining to her and reminding her, is that what I need most in the world is to have her and our children depend on and need me.
    While she would say (jokingly) that I need my ever-expanding gun collection and our yearly Wyoming alpine fishing trips, what fulfills me the most and makes me glad to get out of bed every day is knowing that I can satisfy the needs of her and our children. Nothing else even comes close for me.

  • @monkeyboundleathers2798
    @monkeyboundleathers2798 2 місяці тому

    Hi Dwayne. Thankyou for being a calm, encouraging, voice of reason in this crazy day and age. Keep speaking your strong words of common sense.
    I thanks you Sir

  • @atombb98
    @atombb98 8 місяців тому +4

    My life was changed when I stopped approaching life thinking, "I just want a woman. Any woman." When I stopped myself and instead said, "God send me the woman you have set out for me. In your time, according to your will. In Jesus Christ's name I pray. Amen." One is desperation and the other is acceptance...

  • @charlescollins8385
    @charlescollins8385 8 місяців тому +14

    A lot of folks these days can’t handle “plain talk” but it’s much needed. Thanks for the wisdom and advice. ❤

    • @smokingcrab2290
      @smokingcrab2290 8 місяців тому

      It's a bullshit cope. People need each other. Otherwise relationships would not exist period. This is just pseudo stoic cowboy horseshit. For this guy to say "he does not need his wife" well why tf did he get married? Lol marriage is a damn headache. So for someone who doesn't "need" his wife, he sure signed his life away to misery.

  • @toacristoba
    @toacristoba 8 місяців тому

    Thank you Mr Dwayne!!!
    You've helped me a lot with your talks and videos! Hugs from Chile to you and your wife 🇨🇱

  • @LimeXC
    @LimeXC 8 місяців тому

    I always get up and do something when I watch your videos. Thanks mate.

  • @perculiar_daughter
    @perculiar_daughter 8 місяців тому +7

    I often say this to my grown kids, never be with someone because you "need" them, do it because you want them. I never needed their father and still don't, but I want him with every fibre of my being. People think that if they get the things they need, then they will be happy, when most of the time they don't realise they are only imprisoning themselves.

    • @BoldJonathan
      @BoldJonathan 8 місяців тому

      Well put. I like this

    • @yuryhalim3733
      @yuryhalim3733 8 місяців тому +2

      "I want him with every fibre of my being", sounds more like a "need" to me, though 😊