the first tip is honestly so important, because i used to read about other guys knowing they're trans from a very young age whereas i only figured it out when i was around 12-13 and it made me feel insecure, as i'd always be interested in stereotypically feminine things as a child, and it made me paranoid that i'm not really trans and that i'm saying it for attention? idk my subconcious is always worrying. but then i saw an ask on tumblr to a trans support blog, and the person had the same problem i did. i was reassured that people figure out their gender identities at varying ages, some people are still unsure as they grow older. so he's right, don't compare yourself to others, it can lead to unnecessary worry.
I have a similar experience, starting to doubt gender around 13,14 and now I’m 15 and I guess I’m trans, good to know I’m not the only one who was pretty feminine in the past😊
Omg I feel the exact way I always enjoyed „feminine“ stuff like Barbies or something like that and now I don’t have a clue if I do it for attention (unconscious) or if i am actually trans. I am 13 now and idk if I should cut my hair
Omg yes that's what I wanted to hear, I never thought of being a guy before because I thought they were so weird and different from girls and I never had boys as I friend, I'm 14 and I hope I'm not trans but idk the idea of being a guy is awesome and I don't think it's because cultural stuff, I would feel myself but I'm not sure
After over a year, still questioning, sadly. Part of it is that I have trouble trusting myself and my feelings because I've made so many mistakes in the past. I just don't know what I feel exactly. I don't know if I want to be non binary because I hate the stereotypes of my gender and I'm just very tomboyish, or if I really am non binary. ;-; gender is confusing update: it's 2021 and I'm still getting replies of people saying they relate. I hope you all figure yourselves out! I've come to the conclusion that I am nonbinary because considering myself nonbinary is what makes me the most happy. I struggled a lot with this because I knew I loved when other people called me they/them and other gender neutral things and treated me like a genderless person or even like a guy. though I know I'm definitely not a trans guy because I prefer being seen as genderless or in between genders instead of a man, and if I were to physically transition, I'd be more dysphoric than I am now. I'm still not sure if my hatred for my breasts is dysphoria or if I just want them to be smaller, but I do honestly wish they were small enough that I could look completely flat-chested with a hoodie on tbh. I don't feel right calling myself trans because although gender is a social construct and you don't need dysphoria to be trans, I'd feel bad calling myself trans when I look completely like a cis girl irl. I'd only wanna dress masculine or androgynous some days. but I'm not a girl, I'm a nonbinary person who looks feminine, and that's ok :) actually, as a kid I rejected girly things a lot and wanted to be "one of the boys" and even wished my voice was more androgynous than it is. funny how I've changed my mind since then, I love "girly" things and wouldn't want a deeper voice, but I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not a girl. I'm a genderless person who likes feminine things and wants to look feminine. a nonbinary femboy, if you will :p this may not make sense to you and you may think I'm just a cis girl in denial, and honestly idc! I'm not claiming to be trans, but I am certainly nonbinary. I'll never be happy calling myself a girl, so I'm no longer going to call myself a girl just to appease others who don't even care about my feelings. I've accepted most of the world will never see me as anything but a girl, but to the few who care and will use my preferred pronouns, you're awesome :)
Karashoo Silverclaw don't worry too much about it. For a long time I was confused, but I now know I am a trans guy and I'm happier than I've ever been. Just try experimenting with different things and don't worry about the stereotypes, you are who you are. Trust me when I say you will know one day :)
Isaac Clarke Thanks c: I try not to worry about stereotypes but I still get very confused. I do sort of feel gender dysphoria but idk if it's all in my head because tbh I kind of want to be nonbinary :c
Atlas Nix it's ok I feel similar. I've never been a stereotypical girl and I've started questioning my gender because I can't stand female pronouns and all that. You'll get through it though and just know that I won't judge you no matter what you end up being. That probably doesn't mean a lot but I just wanted to let you know that there are people out there who will support you.
Kieron Its crazy because I feel the exact same way as you. I really want to be a trans guy but in the past i thought i was a lesbian (even though that has nothing to do with gender) and I was wrong. I'm still a bit young, so I don't know if its just because of my hormones that I'm feeling this way.
this video really helped. I'm currently a biological female, and at the moment I identify as female. I have frequent thoughts about being male and I've been debating whether or not to go through with the transition. I'm glad to hear these things, and now I'm becoming more and more certain I want to be a boy.
For me finding out, it was pretty hard because I still like dresses and I can appreciate my biological downstairs. All it really takes is to stop listening to what other people wanted me to be and listened to myself on who I wanted to be. So I decided to express myself as a fabulous gay man
Ive been questioning for a bit and the thing that im worried about is if i transitioned, id be a feminine guy. Im a feminine person, I just wish id been born a male, its hard to explain? Im just worried if in the future if i ever transitioned people would be like, "You still act like a girl why do you want to look like a man!"
being a feminine guy is completely fine. you're not invalid just because you act feminine!!! we're all different and have different stories and different journeys
I'm the same way. I'm pretty ok with my biologically female body, and I take interest in a lot of traditionally feminine things. But I just feel so much better when I express myself as male. I don't really get dysphoria when it comes to my body, except for my lack of male parts (if that makes any sense) so I feel you :,)
femboys exist. you're fine to be a man if you want. tho this was 3 years ago and i haven't gone through the replies yet so you probably figured it out. or not idk
I honestly feel the same, I like Barbies and all that shit, but I'm scared people don't see me as a boy then. It makes me question myself over and over again if I am really trans or just pretending even though 2 years ago it wasn't that worse and I thought I was trans but now it all came back more intense than usual. The feeling is there most of the time outside my house but now you can double that feeling 10×. It sucks. Just be you. And who says boys can't wear cute shit?
My wife constantly thought she was a faker until she starting having other people call her "she" or use her name (Alice). Then she realized it made her feel so happy that there was no way she could be male. So don't feel like you're not trans if you don't have a lot of dysphoria regarding your body or you're not super concerned about your presentation (or both). If identifying as a different gender identity makes you happy, that's what makes you trans. (As a side note -- this concept is known as gender euphoria, the happy flip side of gender dysphoria.) You don't lose any points if you're woman but you don't want to wear a dress or you're a guy but you like makeup. I mean, look at My Chemical Romance. Clearly the makeup thing isn't an impediment for them either. lol
Right. I'm a cis woman and I'm a tomboy ... I don't like dresses skirts makeup and I HATE heels. But I'm not trans, I'm just a tomboy. And my nephew revealed he likes women's tight pants and makeup but he's not trans he's just the opposite of a tomboy. A femboy as they seem to be known as these days. Your interests have nothing to do with gender.
Fuck, im sobbing like a baby. Thank you so much, I really needed to hear that. Been struggling lately. I hope for the best for you and your wife, she sounds like a beautiful woman.
Thank you so much I've been talking to my mum about this lately and I feel like I'm trans and I want to be a girl on the outside I've had a phone call with mermaids an LGBTQ+ charity in the UK and it felt so good to talk about and they emailed me some recourses to check out which sent me to this video
Bruh same. I don’t want to be trans and I don’t think I am. But I still always get worried because the career I am pursuing I think requires you not to be trans. (Actor) correct me if I am wrong
Im not trans, I find your videos so interesting, I have a good friend who is currently starting to transition so its nice to get some more understanding from another perspective. I think its awesome that youve done these videos theyre really informative
I think I'm scared of not being nonbinary. I think I'm somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, but a bit closer to "being a man". So all the dysphoria I have is when I want to "be more manly". I never want to "be more girly". I want to be neutral. I want people not being able to be sure of what gender I am. Or do I? What if I'm just trans? I don't know.
camille lamaster Oh I know, I particularly prefer genderfluid or genderqueer. That's not the issue. What worries me is that I'll stop identifying as nonbinary and just "want to be a man"
Cris Corrêa Transmasculine enby here, it sounds like perhaps we've gone through something similar. I'm honestly so comfortable with masculinity and "maleness" in reference to myself that if I had to stick to one side of the binary for the rest of my life, then I'd happily ID as a man...but it's still not 100% correct for me. Maybe things will change in the future, but what's important is how we feel right now. It's okay to ID as nonbinary now, and it's okay if maybe later down the road in your life you feel differently. You deserve happiness and comfort right here and now 💛
Monochrome Hyena Thanks for your comment! Maybe this confusion will go away when I come out for real. I'm still afraid of what my parents and family will think. I have a gay uncle and a lesbian cousin, so they'll probably be fine with my pansexuality. Also, my older brother is gay. He knows I'm pan but I've never really talked to him about my gender identity. I'm only really out to my friends, basically, and just like 3 of them know I'm nb
Cris Corrêa that's okay. I had a period when I was genderfluid. to some extent I still am. it was through exploring that and allowing myself to be both genders and mix things up that I found how much more comfortable I really was as a girl. so I encourage you to dress manly man and girly girl and everything in between so you can truely find where you stand in the gender spectrum.
I really wish I could just be myself. I live in a very conservative community, and not that many people will accept trans in general. But being a trans guy and doing anything "girly" will immediately invalidate me in everyone elses eyes. And if it turns out I'm non-binary, that would be awful since most of the jokes at my school are centered around making fun of trans and non-binary individuals. But thanks for this it was surprisingly helpful.
I must admit, there are days when I don't feel masculine and there are days where I do. Hearing that it's okay to be a trans guy who wants to wear makeup and wear feminine clothes from someone I admire actually brought me to tears. I'm so glad I watched this and I'm so glad I started watching.
I was Caitlynn. I'm Cade now. I've bought some guy clothes and got my hair cut. And having breasts bothers me kinda badly sometimes. I was going to buy a binder soon.
I Idk my gender I'm srsly questioning and I think I'm ftm but I still don't know my birth name is Jenna but my friends call me Sam and sometimes I hate my body and sometimes it doesn't bother me too much but I got my haircut and I wear a lot of boy clothes but I struggle to hide my breasts and I hate it but I'm still questioning but It could b a phase because I'm a teenager and still developing etc sorry for ranting but yeah byee
My birth name is Jasmin. I never particularly liked that name. So I choosed to be called Jay, and it's giving me this fuckin euphoric feeling to introduce me to new people as Jay.
Please read it all Hey, I'm pretty sure I'm trans, I told my mom, she just said "ok, but you aren't doing that yet. And besides, you act to feminine" I was BEYOND mad, all I wanted was help figuring myself out. I was asking her because I've always felt out of place when put in groups with other girls, yeah, I mean, I like SOME of the things that they do, but I just have always felt out of place. It wasn't until I hit puberty about 3-4 years ago and got curves and a chest that I felt really awkward. I've always told myself, "Aliya, you are wrong just shut up stupid girl." I always call my self stupid girl, but I just don't feel like a girl. I dress and act and like things that are stereotypicly "girly" and enjoy it, but I don't feel like a girl myself. I feel like I should be a guy, that just enjoys some stereotypicly "girly" activities. My mom has always called me a tomboy, but I feel like an actual boy, not a tomboy girl. She dosent get it. She won't even let me cut my hair above my shoulder blades. I just want help. I've told 1 of my friends, and he said his dad calls him a fairy-boy, but he says he's just kinda flamboyant. He also told me he is bi. (🎊) I just hate the way I am. Just knowing that both sides of my family are very religeous, makes me sick,I'm scared of this, but I know it's just who I am, I bet my mom hopes it will go away, but I can tell it won't. I want help. Everyone says "if you're trans, you feel it starting at a young age." But me, at a young age, I was a tomboy girl. But for about 4 years now I have felt like I'm supposed to be a boy, and that I'm not the right person. Please excuse my useless rambling and my repetition of the same things, I just really, really, REALLY want help with this. I'm sorry.
I'm in the same position, but i haven't known that I'm trans as long. But i know i am. I have always been kind of feminine and didn't think about my body but when i started to I could tell there was something off about it. My mom is transphobic but my dad is supportive, but it's hard how transphobic she can be. I feel that I am a trans feminine guy. Meant to be a guy that acts and wears feminine things, but is still mostly masculine.
So I don't know where I'm at right now I'm 19 and I've just realized the fact that I may be trans because my trans mtf partner indicated that I have some signs Idk the thought hit me like a rock and I've been scared to get into analyzing it with myself for the past three months I wish I was cis and it's trully hard to realize if I'm trans or not because I don't particularly hate my body I just know that something has been off for my whole life and at first I thought it was just depression and negative thinking but now I see that it may be something else I have no idea
it took me quite a few years to get where i am now. as a child, i always felt as if something was off, but i didn't really question my gender until i was about 12 or 13. then around age 13 to 14 is when i tried out different things, asked my close friends questions i had, and i came out some months before i turned 15. and over the past two years, i've been growing more comfortable. i got a binder (without my mum knowing, unfortunately), i cut off all my hair, i realised i was in love with the name Eren, i started using he/him at school, and i've never felt more like myself. even if other people don't approve of me... i approve of me, and that's helped a lot.
I really really hope I can get to your point one day dude :( I'm super fucking proud of you, you fucking rock. I'd love to get a binder but I'm pretty sure I'd murder myself first for lying to my parents about that before my parents murder me 🧍💧 you go dude!!! I'm super proud of you (I know I already said that just felt like repeating it)
@@weastley0 oh whoa ! this comment was from four years ago now... O: in good news, everything is turning out pretty alright ! i just celebrated my second year on hrt this week. the remainder of high school gave me some struggles, as did moving away from home, but i’ve turned out okay. ^^ you’re gonna get there one day, man. it’s wild seeing old comments of mine, honestly; transitioning is a long, hard road, but i’m happier with myself now than i ever was as a teen. it was worth every single struggle i faced along the way. no matter what, just keep moving forward. those goalposts get closer and closer, and the moment you meet that first one, all the others feel even easier to reach. you’ve fucking got this, i’m so proud of you. ♥️
For me finding out that i was trans relieved me a lot since i wanted to figure out what was wrong with me. I told it straight away my parents since I longed for their understanding and their help. I got none of this. They told me: "Become a man and you won't be part of the damily any longer." I decided to take the therapie and to start with t as soon as possible. I can't loose something I've never had and I won't work for their love any longer. I've spent far to much effort in gaining there love. Even though I'll probably end up alone I'll be finally happy and I won't allow someone to take it from me.
Just recently I came to terms with my gender identity. I'm non-binary (sadly there are no actual neutral pronouns in the language we speak here so it's a bit meh but yeah), I still struggle with saying I'm trans because I know I have a lot of internalised transphobia I'm struggling with and because I feel like I'm 'not trans enough', I know it's dumb but w/e, thanks for this video, I needed it a lot actually 💜
Pffft, you're as trans as I am. (I'm ftm). Just because your "trans-ness" isn't binary doesn't make you any less trans than the rest of us. :D. But I think most trans people (binary or not) go through the feeling of not being "trans enough". There is a lot of pressure (whether external or internal) to act a certain way when you're trans. In my case, coz I'm ftm I get a lot of feelings that I'm "too feminine", that I need to act super-mega-manly in order to be transgender. And then I get twisted up in doubts because maybe if I'm NOT super-mega-manly that means I'm not really trans... bleh. Point is, you're not alone in feeling doubts, and non-binary people are just as transgender as ftm/mtf people.
I'm confused about my identity, I think I'm ftm. I present masculine, bind and have a deeper voice, and whenever I get gendered as male I get really happy. But the prospect of not actually being trans and just confused terrifies me so much that I'm too afraid to tell anyone I'm probably trans(besides like one person). I know it's really uncommon for that to happen but it could, there's a lot of detrans people, and I'm just scared of being that. I'm scared of actually being a woman and like, "wanting" to be one, I could never imagine myself wanting to be a woman, which is why I'm so scared of turning out to be detrans. I'm just rambling at this point I'm probably not making any sense sorry
I'm glad that you said you can carry on doing what you did before if you want--wearing makeup and dresses, etc--because i've realized recently that in attempting to explore my gender identity, i've been trying to adopt toxic masculinity by accident. Just things like: if i'm going to be more masculine, that means i have to be a dude! a bro! i have to break bricks with my bare hands! punch the sun! and just...i'm shaking my head at myself now that i ever thought those things :/ (not that being able to break bricks with your bare hands wouldn't be cool). now i want to explore more gentle masculinity, kind of like Newt Scamander, or like Peter Parker.
this made me feel really validated, thank you so much 💜 I had a really hard time before coming to terms with the fact that I'm nonbinary (for now agender is the best fitting label for me), for the longest time I didn't know about any other genders than man and woman existing and feeling like neither fit me was really difficult, I thought I was broken, alone. and even after learning about nb genders I kept beating myself down like "no you're just a tomboy you don't have *blank* like trans people 'should' have" which only just made things worse. hearing these things would've helped me out a lot back then but even now they are helping, especially that I don't have to fill certain criteria to be trans which unfortunately many people keep telling me... for now I don't think that I'm going to transition, I don't get dysphoria that often (every few months) and since I have the times when I do like having boobs then transitioning could lead me to get dysphoria the other way around than I get it now. binding and making myself look more masculine with makeup helps out a lot and I've never felt dysphoria because of my vagina. most of the time I couldn't care less if I look traditionally masculine or feminine tho I would like to look androgynous so people would be confused af lmao
I just recently came out to myself as a trans guy and i have been thinking that i am trans because before i knew i was trans i thought i was a lesbian and i still only like girls now and i still havent come out to my family yet and i hate that my family call me the wrong pronouns and my family try to make me not wear cloths that i dont feel comfortable in and it sucks. Ik ppl can relate to this but this is just my experience so far and i bow go by the name Connor and all my friends call me it and im so happy that they can understand me un like my family but eventually i will come out to them then hopefully they will understand and call my by my preferred pronouns
Seeing a vid of yours pop up in my sub box is basically an instant pick-me-up no matter how bad my day was going. Thank you always for your openness and positivity 💛
I questioned myself A LOT and I first thought "maybe I'm a demigirl?" So I was comfortable with that but it still didn't feel right so I thought "maybe I'm non binary?" So I was that for a long time aswell, and now I'm thinking even more that I'm trans and I told my mom about me thinking I'm demigirl and me thinking that I'm non binary but I'm too scared to tell her about me thinking that I'm ACTUALLY trans.. but she once asked me "do you just want to be a boy or what? Because I'm just confused" and I answered "no" but now I regret saying that. And I want to talk to someone about my issues but Idk who.. I also heard from a lot of people that every boy was different, one wants to be really manly, and the other is very feminine. So that made me think even more that I'm trans. And I feel like I want to tell her so I can go through this with her as support.
I act like a dude and hate dresses and stuff but I don't feel constantly uncomfortable ( apart from sometimes in very feminine clothing) I suppose im just a tomboy I geuss. anyone else like this?
Yes, kinda I'm a Tomboy and I'm fine with having a Female body, but I feel much more comfortable with he/him pronounce and calling myself Oliver ;-; I'm confused
okay looking back at this comment from before I edited it, it was false. it was back when I thought social dysphoria didn’t count as dysphoria. you do need to have some mismatch w ur dgab to be trans, doesn’t have to be exactly dysphoria, could just be incongruence, and it can be social or physical.
To the people in the replies know that you do not need to be uncomfortable in your body or clothing to be trans. If you are far more happy using different pronouns then the ones you were given and choose to identify that way, THAT is what makes you trans. Stay lovely my dudes ❤️
The fact that I get more support and care from people that don't even know me than my own family is astonishing. Thank you, I really appreciate this video and I needed to hear a lot of this
Me, on google the past few months: “AM I TRANS ?????” “AM I TRANSGENDER QUIZ” “AM I FTM????” “TRANS QUIZ” “SIGNS YOURE TRANS” “SIGNS YOURE NONBINARY” “SIGNS YOURE A TRANS MAN” “HOW DO I FIGURE OUT MY GENDER IDENTITY?????” “MASCULINE NAMES” “AM I TRANS ENOUGH???” I might be ftm. 😭
My biggest point of doubt is that I don't necessarily have any really bad dysphoria. It's just being uncomfortable and feeling itchy in my skin about my feminine body things and a constant feeling of 'Wait, this isn't right at all."
Dude, this made me cry. I've been struggling with my identity for years now, and watching the video and looking through the comment section really helped. Thank you, hope whoever sees this has a good day.
Gender has to be one of the most confusing topics there is. I am currently going through gender dysmorphia so that’s why im watching all these videos and this really helped. It was short and simple. I really want to tell me mom about how I feel but I just don’t know how, I’m not so sure she would be accepting of me plus I’m not so sure of what I want.
Sooooo I absolutely did search this because 1) I’ve been wondering many thing and 2) quarantine has allowed me to experiment more. So I’ve always been told that I’m not a girly girl, always the tomboy or the boyish girl with more guy friends than girl friends, and I honestly like it that way, I’m not into dresses or make up much, I love dressing for comfort and not always for beauty. I also have wanted to cut my hair for quite some time, for about three years but I’ve kept it growing in order to donate it for the kids with cancer, and during this quarantine Ive tried many things, I bought my first “boy” outfit, (I say that with the “” thingies because clothes don’t have gender), and I wore it and it felt amazing, I hid my long ass hair under a beanie and I felt the most normal I’ve ever felt. I also tried binding but that felt horrendous, would not recommend if you have respiratory problems, but other than that I felt... normal. More to everything I’m also very very bisexual, which took my closest friend by surprise which was quite funny but since then we started talking about girls we like so it even strengthen our bond. Even one day a name came to mind that just sits right, Marlon, and I think that is my name but, I don’t think it would be a good idea to come out because that would kill my mother and mortify my dad... so I think I’m happy with that right now and I think that’s good.
How I knew I was trans: I married a trans wife and then 12 years later during Gender Odyssey, I freaked the fuck out over her asking if I wanted to go to the movie and she said "this is not a normal reaction. Are you afraid you're trans?" and then the dam broke. We laugh because hindsight is 20/20 and I subconsciously dropped hints during our relationship like "I wonder what it would be like to be a guy for a week." Her response was always "you wouldn't like it much." She stopped saying that when she saw how much happier I am as I transitioned. I started my social transition in January of 2008 and my medical transition in June of the same year. We're still together. We celebrated 26 years in May.
I just recently realized I'm a trans man and your videos have been very helpful. I'm still experimenting, but I've managed to pick a new name for myself and it's amazing how good it feels to finally realize who you are. Thanks for your videos and sharing resources like the scientific studies you've mentioned in your other videos. You and Shaaba keep being awesome
Shit......I just got a whole wave of nostalgia. I so vividly remember watching this a little over a year ago, when I was still terrified of the possibility of not being a girl. Jamie has been such a massive help through this all.
Honestly, you are such a blessing and literally the most helpful channel for trans guys I have ever found on YT. Thank you so much!! You answer so many questions I have been asking myself in your videos and you frequently manage to give me at least some hope, optimism and a better ability to deal with my own identity. Really, thank you, I am so glad I came across your channel!
Thank you so much for this video Jammi! I have recently discovered that I am trans ftm and the things that you mentioned in this video not only help me be less scared of all of this but also taught me that it’s okay to take time with it and see what works for me and what doesn’t with clothes and everything else. Keep it up!😁
Hey! So I've been very confused about my gender for about a year now. I say confused but deep down I already know I'm trans. I am just waiting for the right moment to be myself and come out, although I dont think that moment will ever come. I've experimented on the internet and realised that identifying myself as a guy is so much easier and more comfortable. But I guess coming out in real life is alot harder, I've never been a big fan of major changes and I feel like coming out will change everything. What is your experience on that? Do you feel that things changed alot for you on a personal level? Or that people started to treat your differently or expected things from you they didnt before? Or did you feel like your environment pressured you into changing rapidly? I feel like once I will come out people want me to have everything figured out and change myself in one day. But Im not sure if I'll ever have everything figured out.
Decided to scroll back through your channel to see if you had done any how you knew content. I'm pretty confident I'm NonBinary but I find myself gaslighting myself. I really appreciate the "wearing makeup and dresses doesn't make you less of a man" kinda thing. Occasionally I do want to do those things and I find myself hesitating because when I do finally get the guts to tell my family I feel like I have to be this totally androgynous blob or they're not going to accept me (in reality multiple people still probably won't and it's got nothing to do with me). Thanks for making the statement and helping me accept that it doesn't make me less NonBinary to sometimes enjoy putting on a dress or makeup
I know this is 6 months ago but ima comment anyway :) im trans (ftm) and my name is jake, ive been having a lot of dysphoria lately with my chest and especially my pronouns if that makes sense. I feel so shitty when someone calls me a girl or she because to me im a boy. My family are supportive, because ive had a badish upbringing mentally my brother thinks i should see someone before making such a huge decision like starting testosterone because i have my first appointment in a few weeks, i dont know why but it got to me and made me questions everything about myself after being out for almost 2 years! Explanation for why im on this video. Im nearly 18 but he seems to think that i am looking for a cry for help by saying im trans but ive never shouted my trans-ness to the world if that even makes any sense, i know i am a boy and i am trans and definitely want to start testosterone and i will try and make him understand this is exactly what i want next time i see him, he did think he made me mad which was quite cute because he does care about me and i know he is only looking out for me
Thank you for making this, seriously. Its helping me so much with finding out just who I am. I've felt more masculine than feminine for most of my life, and I think I'm beginning to realise who I am.
hi I sorta kinda didn't come out to my parents as trans but they say I'm to young to know those things. I came out as trans but now they think I'm being influenced by media and my friends. My friends accept it but my parents dont what am I supposed tp do
Sounding well-informed on the topic helps. Parents like to know that you know the consequences and what you're talking about. Maybe something like "Well, if it wasn't as talked about, would you support me then? Even if you think I am being influenced, would you be able to let me experiment with it to see if I'd be happier that way?" It's best to be polite, but still confident.
@@rainbowpanic5632 I ended up being stuck back in the closet. They’re still in heavy denial but I finally got a binder and well I’ve got a year till college. Things are getting better though.
I’m a questioning trans girl and it’s 1:27am on my 16th birthday and even though you’re talking about maleness, you were incredibly comforting and reassuring so thank you
Thanks, Jamie. I'm currently questioning and didn't even realize I liked being called a boy until recently. This really helps. Love you and your videos!
i’ve felt so unsure/uncomfortable with being female since middle school, and now i’m 18 and i still have no clue what my gender is and i still feel so uncomfortable :( it sucks so much
Hey Jammi. I wanted to let you know that this video helped me. I have been questioning my gender for a while now. I have always felt different to the biological females around me, but I never knew how to put how I was feeling into any words. I finally told one of my close friends how I was feeling in 5th grade. They are also in the same boat as me because they are nonbinary, although at the time they didn't know that. I told them "I always felt like a boy, but in some ways I also felt very feminine. I like being mistaken for a man and getting called 'sir' instead of 'ma'am' and when I started growing boobs I actually wanted to jump out of my skin and die sometimes" and they told me that when I figured out what I was feeling, to let them know and they would definitely accept me whenever they were informed. About 4 years later, I have words to express how I feel because society is slowly and surely becoming more accepting of transgender people and even though we still have to fight strongly for our rights, I am so happy with where I am right now. I am not financially able to transition or start T and I can't even afford a binder right now, but that stuff does not make me any less of a man. My name is Troy Nathaniel Crowder, I am 14 years old, and I am FTM transgender and f*****g proud of it. Thank you Jammi and many others for helping me through it all.
So I've recently started questioning my gender and I keep watching vlogs about trans guys and girls and everything in between. Every person I come across says "I've known sense birth, I've known sense birth" It keeps making me feel less and less valid.
Thank you for changing my view. I do like to wear makeup but I like wearing men's clothes and I've always felt off. I didn't really know what trans was until this past year. And having an open mind about it and actually saying it out loud is refreshing.
this is incredibly hard for me. I've been thinking I might be trans for 4 years now but I never really figured it out. I know I'm nonbinary but I also know that people will never consider me such. and nowadays being viewed as the gender I was assigned at birth has become almost unbearable for me to the point where I'm considering transitioning to the other binary option just to feel less bad. I feel some dysphoria sometimes but it's never constant, sometimes I'm happy with my body. the only problem is that my partner, who knows that I am nb, wouldn't stay with me if I started changing my body and social gender.
I'm really glad I stumbled across this video while asking google if I was trans. I'm still going through my "gender crisis" and haven't fully decided where I stand, but I know where I lean towards, and everyone close to me is supportive all along the way. I have frequent moments of knowing that, whatever the case, my body is not what my brain is, and that's a telltale sign that I'm not cisgender! I don't know if I'm truly transgender yet, but watching this video is still important for anyone going through their own gender crisis, because it helps us encourage others that we're still valid throughout the whole process.
I ain´t trans, maybe kinda genderfluid, but I like getting informed about the lovely trans community. Knowing what you fought for and maybe getting to understand you (and everyone) better. Big fan of your work :)
Hi! I am a proud transgender woman. As I was watching your videos, I became even more intrigued as well as inspired. My appreciation and gratitude 🙏🏽 for you sharing with everyone is absolutely beautiful…
Younger me:I'm a girl 1 year later** Younger me: I think I'm a girl Me in 2019: I'm a girl for sure Me: learns what lgtbq is -finds out my sexuality- -gender dysphoria- -confusion- -research- -still confused- Me now: well I'm definitely not female
I’m 23 years old and have just come out to my mum as trans! She took it’s surprisingly well to be honest. I’ve had my hair cut really short in a rather “lads” style for almost a year (long before I stopped the denial 😂🙈)! My mum took me shopping and I bought loads of clothes that are what I’ve always wanted to wear but have been too scared to buy. At the moment I’m experimenting with binding and wearing more masculine clothes but I’m not yet ready to come out to my dad and my friends yet so haven’t gone about with the changing of names and pronouns! I suffer a lot of anxiety and depression but after letting go of this and coming out just to one person seemed to lessen the weight in my chest! I’m of course worried about what the rest of my family (particularly my dad because I’m so close with him!) will think but I won’t let it stop me from being me! Thank you for all of the videos! They’re really informative and helpful!
i am struggling with do i just like the aesthetic of being a dude or would being a guy actually make me happy and i don’t see myself looking like a cute dude so idk I’ll just stay an amoeba forever
Holy shit I really needed to hear this. Literally started crying when u said you can wear whatever you want and express yourself however you want because it still doesn’t change the gender you are. Thanks ❤️
this video just feels so validating. i'm being told all the time that i cannot decide what i am and who i am at my age (under 18) and that i can't be a boy because i was born with a ""girl brain"". i like wearing pastel pinks and cute cat sweaters and stockings and sometimes i feel like maybe i'm not trans because of what i like to wear but i'm absolutely certain that i am and hearing that it's ok to like feminine clothes and still be a trans guy is the best thing EVER! thank you so much for the much needed pep-talk ;w;
about a year ago i started identifying as non binary but recently ive realised i might be a trans man and i’ve been really stressing about what to label myself, and tbh i really needed to hear this so thanks
my mum thinks my friends make me trans even though since I was six I said things like "i want the biggest beard" "ima be the best dad" etc, but it's definitely my friends✋🙄
Honestly, your channel helped me so much, I'm a really, really insecure person, and for some time I literally started not acting like me just to be manlier, which obviously made me feel bad, but I kinda realized that I don't need to be a manly guy or relate to every trans man on earth to be valid, thank you so much!
This video helped me so much!! I'm seeing a psychologist who's helping me with my gender identity so my mom knows how I feel and I'm someone who has always liked make-up (special effects makeup and stuff) and sometimes she comes to me and she asks me why I'm wearing make-up if I feel like a boy and that makes me worry even more about my gender and if I'm really trans, but you're right, make-up and clothes have nothing to do with your gender and I feel a lot more confident now! Thanks
I'm currently in limbo, so thank you very much for this, especially the note about taking the time and not worrying about having a label yet. That was definitely helpful.
I came out as trans and I got kicked out of my house. But luckily I had a wonderful lesbian aunt who accepted me and let me live there
That is so precious! I hope you're doing okay.
I mean, not the prettiest experience I imagine, but I'm sure you're strong enough to pull through, mate
Glad your aunt was there for you! :)
Ok now she is the definition of a cool aunt
@@stacysmother6977 absolutely
My dad always says "I can tell when someone is trans, you don't seem trans to me"
Almost Paper Boats Being trans is a personal, internal thing. Saying someone isn't trans because they don't "act trans" is silly.
Almost Paper Boats - wow, that sounds like the most unhelpful thing ever.
Karashoo Silverclaw That’s completely false, not everyone is the same
That's what happened when I came out...
Rebecca Jean aaaaaa stay strong my bb
I came out to my mom she was fine with me and still said she still loved me🙂
Yay!!! I'm happy for you!
Rae the Tiger aw thank you!!💚💚
Selena ZacariasDraws My mom was the same, but my dad and step mom are a different story...
Erlis xD Because we feel that our birth gender isn't what we are. We feel that we're trapped inside the body of someone else.
*gave
the first tip is honestly so important, because i used to read about other guys knowing they're trans from a very young age whereas i only figured it out when i was around 12-13 and it made me feel insecure, as i'd always be interested in stereotypically feminine things as a child, and it made me paranoid that i'm not really trans and that i'm saying it for attention? idk my subconcious is always worrying. but then i saw an ask on tumblr to a trans support blog, and the person had the same problem i did. i was reassured that people figure out their gender identities at varying ages, some people are still unsure as they grow older. so he's right, don't compare yourself to others, it can lead to unnecessary worry.
I feel the exact same way and I’m 17
Oh my god same???? It's so great to know other people have had similar journeys 💖💕💖💕
I have a similar experience, starting to doubt gender around 13,14 and now I’m 15 and I guess I’m trans, good to know I’m not the only one who was pretty feminine in the past😊
Omg I feel the exact way I always enjoyed „feminine“ stuff like Barbies or something like that and now I don’t have a clue if I do it for attention (unconscious) or if i am actually trans. I am 13 now and idk if I should cut my hair
Omg yes that's what I wanted to hear, I never thought of being a guy before because I thought they were so weird and different from girls and I never had boys as I friend, I'm 14 and I hope I'm not trans but idk the idea of being a guy is awesome and I don't think it's because cultural stuff, I would feel myself but I'm not sure
After over a year, still questioning, sadly. Part of it is that I have trouble trusting myself and my feelings because I've made so many mistakes in the past. I just don't know what I feel exactly. I don't know if I want to be non binary because I hate the stereotypes of my gender and I'm just very tomboyish, or if I really am non binary. ;-; gender is confusing
update: it's 2021 and I'm still getting replies of people saying they relate. I hope you all figure yourselves out! I've come to the conclusion that I am nonbinary because considering myself nonbinary is what makes me the most happy. I struggled a lot with this because I knew I loved when other people called me they/them and other gender neutral things and treated me like a genderless person or even like a guy. though I know I'm definitely not a trans guy because I prefer being seen as genderless or in between genders instead of a man, and if I were to physically transition, I'd be more dysphoric than I am now. I'm still not sure if my hatred for my breasts is dysphoria or if I just want them to be smaller, but I do honestly wish they were small enough that I could look completely flat-chested with a hoodie on tbh. I don't feel right calling myself trans because although gender is a social construct and you don't need dysphoria to be trans, I'd feel bad calling myself trans when I look completely like a cis girl irl. I'd only wanna dress masculine or androgynous some days. but I'm not a girl, I'm a nonbinary person who looks feminine, and that's ok :) actually, as a kid I rejected girly things a lot and wanted to be "one of the boys" and even wished my voice was more androgynous than it is. funny how I've changed my mind since then, I love "girly" things and wouldn't want a deeper voice, but I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not a girl. I'm a genderless person who likes feminine things and wants to look feminine. a nonbinary femboy, if you will :p this may not make sense to you and you may think I'm just a cis girl in denial, and honestly idc! I'm not claiming to be trans, but I am certainly nonbinary. I'll never be happy calling myself a girl, so I'm no longer going to call myself a girl just to appease others who don't even care about my feelings. I've accepted most of the world will never see me as anything but a girl, but to the few who care and will use my preferred pronouns, you're awesome :)
Karashoo Silverclaw don't worry too much about it. For a long time I was confused, but I now know I am a trans guy and I'm happier than I've ever been. Just try experimenting with different things and don't worry about the stereotypes, you are who you are. Trust me when I say you will know one day :)
Isaac Clarke Thanks c: I try not to worry about stereotypes but I still get very confused. I do sort of feel gender dysphoria but idk if it's all in my head because tbh I kind of want to be nonbinary :c
Omg same. idk anymore about myself. I just consider myself genderfluid.... I don't think I'd ever fully transition....
Atlas Nix it's ok I feel similar. I've never been a stereotypical girl and I've started questioning my gender because I can't stand female pronouns and all that. You'll get through it though and just know that I won't judge you no matter what you end up being. That probably doesn't mean a lot but I just wanted to let you know that there are people out there who will support you.
Kieron Its crazy because I feel the exact same way as you. I really want to be a trans guy but in the past i thought i was a lesbian (even though that has nothing to do with gender) and I was wrong. I'm still a bit young, so I don't know if its just because of my hormones that I'm feeling this way.
this video really helped. I'm currently a biological female, and at the moment I identify as female. I have frequent thoughts about being male and I've been debating whether or not to go through with the transition. I'm glad to hear these things, and now I'm becoming more and more certain I want to be a boy.
hails How do u identify today, buddy?:)
Me too, and this really helped me
Same. Slowly working my way towards the idea of committing and coming out. Good luck out there!
What do you see yourself as today?
Audrey terry I just got this notification and saw my old comment. I’m out here living as male now!!!! We’re vibing at one month out of the closet!!
For me finding out, it was pretty hard because I still like dresses and I can appreciate my biological downstairs. All it really takes is to stop listening to what other people wanted me to be and listened to myself on who I wanted to be. So I decided to express myself as a fabulous gay man
Tyler Ruffino Same, but straight.
Tyler Talks A Lot Same but I hate wearing dresses. It's the thing of "Ok this five seconds was fun now I hate myself for going through this"
Tyler Talks A Lot My people. 💕
Tyler Talks A Lot right
You should also try being a drag queen, I think you can be more fully expressing with a job like it. :)
I'm in the middle of this struggle and spent half the day crying. Thank you so much for this
averynonym you aren't the only one who is crying
4 years later and i’m now crying
I know this is old but yall need to listen to blue foster. He makes some bomb ass trans music.
@zadiag me too
Same
Ive been questioning for a bit and the thing that im worried about is if i transitioned, id be a feminine guy. Im a feminine person, I just wish id been born a male, its hard to explain? Im just worried if in the future if i ever transitioned people would be like, "You still act like a girl why do you want to look like a man!"
being a feminine guy is completely fine. you're not invalid just because you act feminine!!! we're all different and have different stories and different journeys
I'm the same way. I'm pretty ok with my biologically female body, and I take interest in a lot of traditionally feminine things. But I just feel so much better when I express myself as male. I don't really get dysphoria when it comes to my body, except for my lack of male parts (if that makes any sense) so I feel you :,)
femboys exist. you're fine to be a man if you want. tho this was 3 years ago and i haven't gone through the replies yet so you probably figured it out. or not idk
I feel the exact same
I honestly feel the same, I like Barbies and all that shit, but I'm scared people don't see me as a boy then. It makes me question myself over and over again if I am really trans or just pretending even though 2 years ago it wasn't that worse and I thought I was trans but now it all came back more intense than usual. The feeling is there most of the time outside my house but now you can double that feeling 10×. It sucks. Just be you. And who says boys can't wear cute shit?
My wife constantly thought she was a faker until she starting having other people call her "she" or use her name (Alice). Then she realized it made her feel so happy that there was no way she could be male.
So don't feel like you're not trans if you don't have a lot of dysphoria regarding your body or you're not super concerned about your presentation (or both). If identifying as a different gender identity makes you happy, that's what makes you trans. (As a side note -- this concept is known as gender euphoria, the happy flip side of gender dysphoria.)
You don't lose any points if you're woman but you don't want to wear a dress or you're a guy but you like makeup. I mean, look at My Chemical Romance. Clearly the makeup thing isn't an impediment for them either. lol
This just made my day a lot better thank you 💕💞
I wish you that best for you and your wife too
@@LEE-ke5uq Aw, thank you! We're still going strong. My wife gets more and more beautiful every day. 💙
Right. I'm a cis woman and I'm a tomboy ... I don't like dresses skirts makeup and I HATE heels. But I'm not trans, I'm just a tomboy. And my nephew revealed he likes women's tight pants and makeup but he's not trans he's just the opposite of a tomboy. A femboy as they seem to be known as these days. Your interests have nothing to do with gender.
Fuck, im sobbing like a baby. Thank you so much, I really needed to hear that. Been struggling lately. I hope for the best for you and your wife, she sounds like a beautiful woman.
Thank you so much I've been talking to my mum about this lately and I feel like I'm trans and I want to be a girl on the outside I've had a phone call with mermaids an LGBTQ+ charity in the UK and it felt so good to talk about and they emailed me some recourses to check out which sent me to this video
I think I was just scared of being trans, even though I see myself as very masculine. This helped me, thank you for making this video :-)
Cody K. Me to. I'll be thirty in a month and I have no idea what to do.
Bruh same. I don’t want to be trans and I don’t think I am. But I still always get worried because the career I am pursuing I think requires you not to be trans. (Actor) correct me if I am wrong
Aidan Leonard I know lots of actors who are trans so I think you’ll be fine 😊
SAME, like im scared to get any surgery/testosterone because idk if it can be reversed
I’m curious what happened in the three years from posting that to now.
Im not trans, I find your videos so interesting, I have a good friend who is currently starting to transition so its nice to get some more understanding from another perspective. I think its awesome that youve done these videos theyre really informative
I think I'm scared of not being nonbinary. I think I'm somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, but a bit closer to "being a man".
So all the dysphoria I have is when I want to "be more manly". I never want to "be more girly". I want to be neutral. I want people not being able to be sure of what gender I am.
Or do I?
What if I'm just trans?
I don't know.
camille lamaster Oh I know, I particularly prefer genderfluid or genderqueer. That's not the issue. What worries me is that I'll stop identifying as nonbinary and just "want to be a man"
Cris Corrêa Transmasculine enby here, it sounds like perhaps we've gone through something similar. I'm honestly so comfortable with masculinity and "maleness" in reference to myself that if I had to stick to one side of the binary for the rest of my life, then I'd happily ID as a man...but it's still not 100% correct for me. Maybe things will change in the future, but what's important is how we feel right now. It's okay to ID as nonbinary now, and it's okay if maybe later down the road in your life you feel differently. You deserve happiness and comfort right here and now 💛
Monochrome Hyena Thanks for your comment! Maybe this confusion will go away when I come out for real. I'm still afraid of what my parents and family will think. I have a gay uncle and a lesbian cousin, so they'll probably be fine with my pansexuality. Also, my older brother is gay. He knows I'm pan but I've never really talked to him about my gender identity. I'm only really out to my friends, basically, and just like 3 of them know I'm nb
Cris Corrêa that's okay. I had a period when I was genderfluid. to some extent I still am. it was through exploring that and allowing myself to be both genders and mix things up that I found how much more comfortable I really was as a girl. so I encourage you to dress manly man and girly girl and everything in between so you can truely find where you stand in the gender spectrum.
Donie B I'll try to explore more haha. Thanks for sharing!
I really wish I could just be myself. I live in a very conservative community, and not that many people will accept trans in general. But being a trans guy and doing anything "girly" will immediately invalidate me in everyone elses eyes. And if it turns out I'm non-binary, that would be awful since most of the jokes at my school are centered around making fun of trans and non-binary individuals. But thanks for this it was surprisingly helpful.
Carter S same
Carter S i know how u feel
Step number one: don’t compare yourself to other people
Me, a person who does this because I’m looking for answers: oh...
I must admit, there are days when I don't feel masculine and there are days where I do. Hearing that it's okay to be a trans guy who wants to wear makeup and wear feminine clothes from someone I admire actually brought me to tears. I'm so glad I watched this and I'm so glad I started watching.
I was Caitlynn.
I'm Cade now.
I've bought some guy clothes and got my hair cut.
And having breasts bothers me kinda badly sometimes.
I was going to buy a binder soon.
My name was Allison but now I'm Kevin. ☺
I Idk my gender I'm srsly questioning and I think I'm ftm but I still don't know my birth name is Jenna but my friends call me Sam and sometimes I hate my body and sometimes it doesn't bother me too much but I got my haircut and I wear a lot of boy clothes but I struggle to hide my breasts and I hate it but I'm still questioning but It could b a phase because I'm a teenager and still developing etc sorry for ranting but yeah byee
music heaven i feel you
My birth name is Jasmin. I never particularly liked that name.
So I choosed to be called Jay, and it's giving me this fuckin euphoric feeling to introduce me to new people as Jay.
I know this is old but my name was Kaitlynn and I go by Jay now.
Please read it all
Hey, I'm pretty sure I'm trans, I told my mom, she just said "ok, but you aren't doing that yet. And besides, you act to feminine" I was BEYOND mad, all I wanted was help figuring myself out. I was asking her because I've always felt out of place when put in groups with other girls, yeah, I mean, I like SOME of the things that they do, but I just have always felt out of place. It wasn't until I hit puberty about 3-4 years ago and got curves and a chest that I felt really awkward. I've always told myself, "Aliya, you are wrong just shut up stupid girl." I always call my self stupid girl, but I just don't feel like a girl. I dress and act and like things that are stereotypicly "girly" and enjoy it, but I don't feel like a girl myself. I feel like I should be a guy, that just enjoys some stereotypicly "girly" activities. My mom has always called me a tomboy, but I feel like an actual boy, not a tomboy girl. She dosent get it. She won't even let me cut my hair above my shoulder blades. I just want help. I've told 1 of my friends, and he said his dad calls him a fairy-boy, but he says he's just kinda flamboyant. He also told me he is bi. (🎊) I just hate the way I am. Just knowing that both sides of my family are very religeous, makes me sick,I'm scared of this, but I know it's just who I am, I bet my mom hopes it will go away, but I can tell it won't. I want help. Everyone says "if you're trans, you feel it starting at a young age." But me, at a young age, I was a tomboy girl. But for about 4 years now I have felt like I'm supposed to be a boy, and that I'm not the right person. Please excuse my useless rambling and my repetition of the same things, I just really, really, REALLY want help with this. I'm sorry.
I'm in the same position, but i haven't known that I'm trans as long. But i know i am.
I have always been kind of feminine and didn't think about my body but when i started to I could tell there was something off about it.
My mom is transphobic but my dad is supportive, but it's hard how transphobic she can be.
I feel that I am a trans feminine guy. Meant to be a guy that acts and wears feminine things, but is still mostly masculine.
did it get any better dude?
You are valid, and deserve the right to be who you are, the true you.
its three years later is it going better now?
hey its been 3 years how are u?
The dislikes on this video are all the homophobic Christian Karen's who are trying to find proof that's their kids aren't trans
Amen
I cant believe theres only 44
Sage the mage fr tho
Lol
Im trans & christian
So I don't know where I'm at right now
I'm 19 and I've just realized the fact that I may be trans because my trans mtf partner indicated that I have some signs
Idk the thought hit me like a rock and I've been scared to get into analyzing it with myself for the past three months
I wish I was cis and it's trully hard to realize if I'm trans or not because I don't particularly hate my body I just know that something has been off for my whole life and at first I thought it was just depression and negative thinking but now I see that it may be something else
I have no idea
My mom recently bought me men's shorts for xmas (she made me pick clothes out bc I'm really particular about what I wear, this was today btw)
I told my mum and she started crying, saying she "missed the old me" i feel horrible now and not nearly as confident as i was before
You still are the old you. Fuck her
@@completely100percenthuman thanks! luckily they are much more understanding now (how did so much happen in 9 months?? O_O)
@@pepefrog751 awesome man! I’m happy for you :D
@@pepefrog751 what If someone from another religion want to be transsexuel is that okay?
fuck her! you're valid. you don't have to be the "old you", they seem sad. you're allowed to be happy and comfortable in your own skin. Rock on dude!
it took me quite a few years to get where i am now. as a child, i always felt as if something was off, but i didn't really question my gender until i was about 12 or 13. then around age 13 to 14 is when i tried out different things, asked my close friends questions i had, and i came out some months before i turned 15. and over the past two years, i've been growing more comfortable. i got a binder (without my mum knowing, unfortunately), i cut off all my hair, i realised i was in love with the name Eren, i started using he/him at school, and i've never felt more like myself. even if other people don't approve of me... i approve of me, and that's helped a lot.
I really really hope I can get to your point one day dude :( I'm super fucking proud of you, you fucking rock. I'd love to get a binder but I'm pretty sure I'd murder myself first for lying to my parents about that before my parents murder me 🧍💧 you go dude!!! I'm super proud of you (I know I already said that just felt like repeating it)
@@weastley0 oh whoa ! this comment was from four years ago now... O:
in good news, everything is turning out pretty alright ! i just celebrated my second year on hrt this week. the remainder of high school gave me some struggles, as did moving away from home, but i’ve turned out okay. ^^
you’re gonna get there one day, man. it’s wild seeing old comments of mine, honestly; transitioning is a long, hard road, but i’m happier with myself now than i ever was as a teen. it was worth every single struggle i faced along the way.
no matter what, just keep moving forward. those goalposts get closer and closer, and the moment you meet that first one, all the others feel even easier to reach. you’ve fucking got this, i’m so proud of you. ♥️
For me finding out that i was trans relieved me a lot since i wanted to figure out what was wrong with me. I told it straight away my parents since I longed for their understanding and their help. I got none of this. They told me: "Become a man and you won't be part of the damily any longer."
I decided to take the therapie and to start with t as soon as possible. I can't loose something I've never had and I won't work for their love any longer. I've spent far to much effort in gaining there love. Even though I'll probably end up alone I'll be finally happy and I won't allow someone to take it from me.
Just recently I came to terms with my gender identity. I'm non-binary (sadly there are no actual neutral pronouns in the language we speak here so it's a bit meh but yeah), I still struggle with saying I'm trans because I know I have a lot of internalised transphobia I'm struggling with and because I feel like I'm 'not trans enough', I know it's dumb but w/e, thanks for this video, I needed it a lot actually 💜
Pffft, you're as trans as I am. (I'm ftm). Just because your "trans-ness" isn't binary doesn't make you any less trans than the rest of us. :D.
But I think most trans people (binary or not) go through the feeling of not being "trans enough". There is a lot of pressure (whether external or internal) to act a certain way when you're trans. In my case, coz I'm ftm I get a lot of feelings that I'm "too feminine", that I need to act super-mega-manly in order to be transgender. And then I get twisted up in doubts because maybe if I'm NOT super-mega-manly that means I'm not really trans... bleh.
Point is, you're not alone in feeling doubts, and non-binary people are just as transgender as ftm/mtf people.
Same I have internalized transphobia and that sucks :( we can make it!💪 we are stronger than denial and non-self-acceptance ^^
I’m an enby and I relate to this.
Are you still non-binary? Healthy? Alive? I hope all is well : )
@@kevingieske6882 lol seeing this comment again gave me whiplash yup still non binary but finally comfortable w ms
this is so sweet and positive
I'm confused about my identity, I think I'm ftm. I present masculine, bind and have a deeper voice, and whenever I get gendered as male I get really happy. But the prospect of not actually being trans and just confused terrifies me so much that I'm too afraid to tell anyone I'm probably trans(besides like one person). I know it's really uncommon for that to happen but it could, there's a lot of detrans people, and I'm just scared of being that. I'm scared of actually being a woman and like, "wanting" to be one, I could never imagine myself wanting to be a woman, which is why I'm so scared of turning out to be detrans. I'm just rambling at this point I'm probably not making any sense sorry
Me too
I've been needing this video😩 I'm pretty sure I'm trans
rattie home me too!
Same...
rattie home same
same for me
Matthew dog yoooooooooo mattttttrattttttt fancy finding you here
I'm glad that you said you can carry on doing what you did before if you want--wearing makeup and dresses, etc--because i've realized recently that in attempting to explore my gender identity, i've been trying to adopt toxic masculinity by accident. Just things like: if i'm going to be more masculine, that means i have to be a dude! a bro! i have to break bricks with my bare hands! punch the sun!
and just...i'm shaking my head at myself now that i ever thought those things :/ (not that being able to break bricks with your bare hands wouldn't be cool).
now i want to explore more gentle masculinity, kind of like Newt Scamander, or like Peter Parker.
this made me feel really validated, thank you so much 💜 I had a really hard time before coming to terms with the fact that I'm nonbinary (for now agender is the best fitting label for me), for the longest time I didn't know about any other genders than man and woman existing and feeling like neither fit me was really difficult, I thought I was broken, alone. and even after learning about nb genders I kept beating myself down like "no you're just a tomboy you don't have *blank* like trans people 'should' have" which only just made things worse. hearing these things would've helped me out a lot back then but even now they are helping, especially that I don't have to fill certain criteria to be trans which unfortunately many people keep telling me...
for now I don't think that I'm going to transition, I don't get dysphoria that often (every few months) and since I have the times when I do like having boobs then transitioning could lead me to get dysphoria the other way around than I get it now. binding and making myself look more masculine with makeup helps out a lot and I've never felt dysphoria because of my vagina. most of the time I couldn't care less if I look traditionally masculine or feminine tho I would like to look androgynous so people would be confused af lmao
this video made me cry idk who I am or what I identify as but I really relate to this video. thank you
I just recently came out to myself as a trans guy and i have been thinking that i am trans because before i knew i was trans i thought i was a lesbian and i still only like girls now and i still havent come out to my family yet and i hate that my family call me the wrong pronouns and my family try to make me not wear cloths that i dont feel comfortable in and it sucks. Ik ppl can relate to this but this is just my experience so far and i bow go by the name Connor and all my friends call me it and im so happy that they can understand me un like my family but eventually i will come out to them then hopefully they will understand and call my by my preferred pronouns
Seeing a vid of yours pop up in my sub box is basically an instant pick-me-up no matter how bad my day was going. Thank you always for your openness and positivity 💛
I questioned myself A LOT and I first thought "maybe I'm a demigirl?" So I was comfortable with that but it still didn't feel right so I thought "maybe I'm non binary?" So I was that for a long time aswell, and now I'm thinking even more that I'm trans and I told my mom about me thinking I'm demigirl and me thinking that I'm non binary but I'm too scared to tell her about me thinking that I'm ACTUALLY trans.. but she once asked me "do you just want to be a boy or what? Because I'm just confused" and I answered "no" but now I regret saying that. And I want to talk to someone about my issues but Idk who..
I also heard from a lot of people that every boy was different, one wants to be really manly, and the other is very feminine. So that made me think even more that I'm trans. And I feel like I want to tell her so I can go through this with her as support.
I act like a dude and hate dresses and stuff but I don't feel constantly uncomfortable ( apart from sometimes in very feminine clothing) I suppose im just a tomboy I geuss. anyone else like this?
Yes, kinda
I'm a Tomboy and I'm fine with having a Female body, but I feel much more comfortable with he/him pronounce and calling myself Oliver ;-; I'm confused
Yeah
okay looking back at this comment from before I edited it, it was false. it was back when I thought social dysphoria didn’t count as dysphoria. you do need to have some mismatch w ur dgab to be trans, doesn’t have to be exactly dysphoria, could just be incongruence, and it can be social or physical.
See its going to take time to figure out
To the people in the replies know that you do not need to be uncomfortable in your body or clothing to be trans. If you are far more happy using different pronouns then the ones you were given and choose to identify that way, THAT is what makes you trans. Stay lovely my dudes ❤️
Videos like these save the lives of so many trans kids. Thank you for helping people
@Lotra Cuenta ok..? I'm sorry you feel that way I guess? 🤣
Thank you so much for making this video it has really boosted my confidence,I can hopefully tell my friends and family soon! It has really helped
Have you told them yet?
If so, how did it go?
If not, good luck!
The fact that I get more support and care from people that don't even know me than my own family is astonishing. Thank you, I really appreciate this video and I needed to hear a lot of this
And as a side note, that's why our flag can be a rainbow, covers the WHOLE spectrum of who a human can be!!!!
Jamie has evolved so much
Me, on google the past few months:
“AM I TRANS ?????”
“AM I TRANSGENDER QUIZ”
“AM I FTM????”
“TRANS QUIZ”
“SIGNS YOURE TRANS”
“SIGNS YOURE NONBINARY”
“SIGNS YOURE A TRANS MAN”
“HOW DO I FIGURE OUT MY GENDER IDENTITY?????”
“MASCULINE NAMES”
“AM I TRANS ENOUGH???”
I might be ftm. 😭
THAT'S LITERALLY MY SEARCH HISTORY 😭
well, same
My biggest point of doubt is that I don't necessarily have any really bad dysphoria. It's just being uncomfortable and feeling itchy in my skin about my feminine body things and a constant feeling of 'Wait, this isn't right at all."
I'm so confused about myself I'm crying. But I'm glad I found your channel.
Dude, this made me cry. I've been struggling with my identity for years now, and watching the video and looking through the comment section really helped. Thank you, hope whoever sees this has a good day.
Gender has to be one of the most confusing topics there is. I am currently going through gender dysmorphia so that’s why im watching all these videos and this really helped. It was short and simple. I really want to tell me mom about how I feel but I just don’t know how, I’m not so sure she would be accepting of me plus I’m not so sure of what I want.
god you made me cry im so happy I'm not the only one who feels like this
Sooooo I absolutely did search this because 1) I’ve been wondering many thing and 2) quarantine has allowed me to experiment more. So I’ve always been told that I’m not a girly girl, always the tomboy or the boyish girl with more guy friends than girl friends, and I honestly like it that way, I’m not into dresses or make up much, I love dressing for comfort and not always for beauty. I also have wanted to cut my hair for quite some time, for about three years but I’ve kept it growing in order to donate it for the kids with cancer, and during this quarantine Ive tried many things, I bought my first “boy” outfit, (I say that with the “” thingies because clothes don’t have gender), and I wore it and it felt amazing, I hid my long ass hair under a beanie and I felt the most normal I’ve ever felt. I also tried binding but that felt horrendous, would not recommend if you have respiratory problems, but other than that I felt... normal. More to everything I’m also very very bisexual, which took my closest friend by surprise which was quite funny but since then we started talking about girls we like so it even strengthen our bond. Even one day a name came to mind that just sits right, Marlon, and I think that is my name but, I don’t think it would be a good idea to come out because that would kill my mother and mortify my dad... so I think I’m happy with that right now and I think that’s good.
How I knew I was trans: I married a trans wife and then 12 years later during Gender Odyssey, I freaked the fuck out over her asking if I wanted to go to the movie and she said "this is not a normal reaction. Are you afraid you're trans?" and then the dam broke. We laugh because hindsight is 20/20 and I subconsciously dropped hints during our relationship like "I wonder what it would be like to be a guy for a week." Her response was always "you wouldn't like it much." She stopped saying that when she saw how much happier I am as I transitioned. I started my social transition in January of 2008 and my medical transition in June of the same year. We're still together. We celebrated 26 years in May.
I'm glad my dad tells me that if I was apart of the lgbtq+ community he would accept me and this video really helps
I just recently realized I'm a trans man and your videos have been very helpful. I'm still experimenting, but I've managed to pick a new name for myself and it's amazing how good it feels to finally realize who you are. Thanks for your videos and sharing resources like the scientific studies you've mentioned in your other videos. You and Shaaba keep being awesome
Omg this makes me feel so good. I'm more comfortable with myself. thanks Jamie, I really needed something like this💖💖💖
Shit......I just got a whole wave of nostalgia. I so vividly remember watching this a little over a year ago, when I was still terrified of the possibility of not being a girl. Jamie has been such a massive help through this all.
I needed this
Honestly, you are such a blessing and literally the most helpful channel for trans guys I have ever found on YT. Thank you so much!! You answer so many questions I have been asking myself in your videos and you frequently manage to give me at least some hope, optimism and a better ability to deal with my own identity. Really, thank you, I am so glad I came across your channel!
I told my mom I was trans. And she said “ok”. ❤️
in a good or bad way
Thank you so much for this video Jammi! I have recently discovered that I am trans ftm and the things that you mentioned in this video not only help me be less scared of all of this but also taught me that it’s okay to take time with it and see what works for me and what doesn’t with clothes and everything else. Keep it up!😁
i think i’m in denial cuz i feel like being trans might make my life harder 😔
Thanks so much for making this video!
everyone who sees this comment.
watch this again 1:35
Tegytte I’m not to that point yet
Dude,ludzuluayoeilousluf
Lmao
Jamie you’ve been such a light to my journey. I love hearing your voice and your videos and they really reassure me. Thank you.
Hey! So I've been very confused about my gender for about a year now. I say confused but deep down I already know I'm trans. I am just waiting for the right moment to be myself and come out, although I dont think that moment will ever come. I've experimented on the internet and realised that identifying myself as a guy is so much easier and more comfortable. But I guess coming out in real life is alot harder, I've never been a big fan of major changes and I feel like coming out will change everything. What is your experience on that? Do you feel that things changed alot for you on a personal level? Or that people started to treat your differently or expected things from you they didnt before? Or did you feel like your environment pressured you into changing rapidly? I feel like once I will come out people want me to have everything figured out and change myself in one day. But Im not sure if I'll ever have everything figured out.
Check out his "Socially transitioning, expectations vs reality" video. That covers most of the questions you have here :)
Decided to scroll back through your channel to see if you had done any how you knew content. I'm pretty confident I'm NonBinary but I find myself gaslighting myself. I really appreciate the "wearing makeup and dresses doesn't make you less of a man" kinda thing. Occasionally I do want to do those things and I find myself hesitating because when I do finally get the guts to tell my family I feel like I have to be this totally androgynous blob or they're not going to accept me (in reality multiple people still probably won't and it's got nothing to do with me). Thanks for making the statement and helping me accept that it doesn't make me less NonBinary to sometimes enjoy putting on a dress or makeup
I know this is 6 months ago but ima comment anyway :) im trans (ftm) and my name is jake, ive been having a lot of dysphoria lately with my chest and especially my pronouns if that makes sense. I feel so shitty when someone calls me a girl or she because to me im a boy. My family are supportive, because ive had a badish upbringing mentally my brother thinks i should see someone before making such a huge decision like starting testosterone because i have my first appointment in a few weeks, i dont know why but it got to me and made me questions everything about myself after being out for almost 2 years! Explanation for why im on this video. Im nearly 18 but he seems to think that i am looking for a cry for help by saying im trans but ive never shouted my trans-ness to the world if that even makes any sense, i know i am a boy and i am trans and definitely want to start testosterone and i will try and make him understand this is exactly what i want next time i see him, he did think he made me mad which was quite cute because he does care about me and i know he is only looking out for me
Thank you for making this, seriously. Its helping me so much with finding out just who I am. I've felt more masculine than feminine for most of my life, and I think I'm beginning to realise who I am.
hi I sorta kinda didn't come out to my parents as trans but they say I'm to young to know those things. I came out as trans but now they think I'm being influenced by media and my friends. My friends accept it but my parents dont what am I supposed tp do
Sounding well-informed on the topic helps. Parents like to know that you know the consequences and what you're talking about. Maybe something like "Well, if it wasn't as talked about, would you support me then? Even if you think I am being influenced, would you be able to let me experiment with it to see if I'd be happier that way?" It's best to be polite, but still confident.
Hey, how are you doing now with your transition and family?
@@rainbowpanic5632 I ended up being stuck back in the closet. They’re still in heavy denial but I finally got a binder and well I’ve got a year till college. Things are getting better though.
this video really helped.
i loved this video thank you so much jamie this made me feel more comfortable in identifying as a transguy 😊
I’m a questioning trans girl and it’s 1:27am on my 16th birthday and even though you’re talking about maleness, you were incredibly comforting and reassuring so thank you
MY MUM ORDERED ME MY FIRST BINDER YYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
im so happy for you! :D
Thanks, Jamie. I'm currently questioning and didn't even realize I liked being called a boy until recently. This really helps. Love you and your videos!
I might come out to my class (7th grade)
-hate my body
-like being called he
-hate girly anything 😐
-never liked dolls, dresses, etc as a small child
Thanks for saying the 1st point- *"Don't compare yourself with others".* Very important.
i’ve felt so unsure/uncomfortable with being female since middle school, and now i’m 18 and i still have no clue what my gender is and i still feel so uncomfortable :( it sucks so much
Me too :((
Hey Jammi. I wanted to let you know that this video helped me. I have been questioning my gender for a while now. I have always felt different to the biological females around me, but I never knew how to put how I was feeling into any words. I finally told one of my close friends how I was feeling in 5th grade. They are also in the same boat as me because they are nonbinary, although at the time they didn't know that. I told them "I always felt like a boy, but in some ways I also felt very feminine. I like being mistaken for a man and getting called 'sir' instead of 'ma'am' and when I started growing boobs I actually wanted to jump out of my skin and die sometimes" and they told me that when I figured out what I was feeling, to let them know and they would definitely accept me whenever they were informed. About 4 years later, I have words to express how I feel because society is slowly and surely becoming more accepting of transgender people and even though we still have to fight strongly for our rights, I am so happy with where I am right now. I am not financially able to transition or start T and I can't even afford a binder right now, but that stuff does not make me any less of a man. My name is Troy Nathaniel Crowder, I am 14 years old, and I am FTM transgender and f*****g proud of it. Thank you Jammi and many others for helping me through it all.
So I've recently started questioning my gender and I keep watching vlogs about trans guys and girls and everything in between. Every person I come across says "I've known sense birth, I've known sense birth" It keeps making me feel less and less valid.
you are very valid. just a late one! if you don't feel completely right being your gender, in that body, or the pronouns you have, you may be trans!
Thank you for changing my view. I do like to wear makeup but I like wearing men's clothes and I've always felt off. I didn't really know what trans was until this past year. And having an open mind about it and actually saying it out loud is refreshing.
this is incredibly hard for me. I've been thinking I might be trans for 4 years now but I never really figured it out. I know I'm nonbinary but I also know that people will never consider me such. and nowadays being viewed as the gender I was assigned at birth has become almost unbearable for me to the point where I'm considering transitioning to the other binary option just to feel less bad. I feel some dysphoria sometimes but it's never constant, sometimes I'm happy with my body. the only problem is that my partner, who knows that I am nb, wouldn't stay with me if I started changing my body and social gender.
I'm really glad I stumbled across this video while asking google if I was trans. I'm still going through my "gender crisis" and haven't fully decided where I stand, but I know where I lean towards, and everyone close to me is supportive all along the way. I have frequent moments of knowing that, whatever the case, my body is not what my brain is, and that's a telltale sign that I'm not cisgender! I don't know if I'm truly transgender yet, but watching this video is still important for anyone going through their own gender crisis, because it helps us encourage others that we're still valid throughout the whole process.
I came out to my friends as trans but now I keep freaking out about whether I came out too soon and if I might not be trans and I’m still so confused
I ain´t trans, maybe kinda genderfluid, but I like getting informed about the lovely trans community. Knowing what you fought for and maybe getting to understand you (and everyone) better. Big fan of your work :)
This was so helpful and positive! Thank you~
Hi! I am a proud transgender woman. As I was watching your videos, I became even more intrigued as well as inspired. My appreciation and gratitude 🙏🏽 for you sharing with everyone is absolutely beautiful…
Younger me:I'm a girl
1 year later**
Younger me: I think I'm a girl
Me in 2019: I'm a girl for sure
Me: learns what lgtbq is
-finds out my sexuality-
-gender dysphoria-
-confusion-
-research-
-still confused-
Me now: well I'm definitely not female
I’m 23 years old and have just come out to my mum as trans! She took it’s surprisingly well to be honest. I’ve had my hair cut really short in a rather “lads” style for almost a year (long before I stopped the denial 😂🙈)! My mum took me shopping and I bought loads of clothes that are what I’ve always wanted to wear but have been too scared to buy.
At the moment I’m experimenting with binding and wearing more masculine clothes but I’m not yet ready to come out to my dad and my friends yet so haven’t gone about with the changing of names and pronouns! I suffer a lot of anxiety and depression but after letting go of this and coming out just to one person seemed to lessen the weight in my chest! I’m of course worried about what the rest of my family (particularly my dad because I’m so close with him!) will think but I won’t let it stop me from being me!
Thank you for all of the videos! They’re really informative and helpful!
i am struggling with do i just like the aesthetic of being a dude or would being a guy actually make me happy and i don’t see myself looking like a cute dude so idk I’ll just stay an amoeba forever
Holy shit I really needed to hear this. Literally started crying when u said you can wear whatever you want and express yourself however you want because it still doesn’t change the gender you are. Thanks ❤️
I am coming out to my school in 4 days, I’m so nervous😭
good luck!
The right side of your mustache extends past your upper lip and I can't stop looking at it...
You're a handsome man. Love your work!
I know haha, I have a hairy mole :P Thank you
I feel really insecure when I watch videos about other people experiences and they don't match with what I feel, so yeah :'D
tbh i feel more comfortable in male clothes and in short hair, it makes me feel more comfortable
I tried coming out to my parents but instead the words didn't come out and I ended up saying how my dog was trans 😅
F
this video just feels so validating. i'm being told all the time that i cannot decide what i am and who i am at my age (under 18) and that i can't be a boy because i was born with a ""girl brain"". i like wearing pastel pinks and cute cat sweaters and stockings and sometimes i feel like maybe i'm not trans because of what i like to wear but i'm absolutely certain that i am and hearing that it's ok to like feminine clothes and still be a trans guy is the best thing EVER! thank you so much for the much needed pep-talk ;w;
when i see boy clothes: i want one
my brain : get all the boy clothes
my parents: NO you cant only if u grow up
about a year ago i started identifying as non binary but recently ive realised i might be a trans man and i’ve been really stressing about what to label myself, and tbh i really needed to hear this so thanks
my mum thinks my friends make me trans even though since I was six I said things like "i want the biggest beard" "ima be the best dad" etc, but it's definitely my friends✋🙄
Honestly, your channel helped me so much, I'm a really, really insecure person, and for some time I literally started not acting like me just to be manlier, which obviously made me feel bad, but I kinda realized that I don't need to be a manly guy or relate to every trans man on earth to be valid, thank you so much!
seeing as how being trans cost a shit ton of money i think its best not to know
This video helped me so much!! I'm seeing a psychologist who's helping me with my gender identity so my mom knows how I feel and I'm someone who has always liked make-up (special effects makeup and stuff) and sometimes she comes to me and she asks me why I'm wearing make-up if I feel like a boy and that makes me worry even more about my gender and if I'm really trans, but you're right, make-up and clothes have nothing to do with your gender and I feel a lot more confident now! Thanks
me: knows im trans
also me: watches video anyway
@social reject I do that too :')
I'm currently in limbo, so thank you very much for this, especially the note about taking the time and not worrying about having a label yet. That was definitely helpful.