I just started reparenting myself. I imagine that I’m a five year old. I take some time in my days to color with crayons , read picture books, color pokemon coloring books, play with playdough and watch cartoons. I’ve been feeling very calm and relaxed ever since.
I have been reparenting myself for the past 2 years and it has changed my life I have a relationship with my inner child my consciousness being the parent my I inner child I regard as my son, being everything else. Thoughts emotions intentions feelings etc And I love my inner child and he is now being expressed in how I treat others because if you treat your inner child who is yourself with love and kindness with complete acceptance especially regarding your wounded inner child it allows your wounded inner child to become healed as you acknowledge and accept your woundedness, feelings experience etc.
I think it's very kind of you to have put up these video's to give people the potential to improve their lives. It's a great opportunity to gain a better understanding of how we process our lives through our childhood conditioning, and the potential is there, through hard work, to move past what was lacking/neglected/unwanted and live a more joyful adult life. Thanks so much. x
A thing I think is related to negative self talk is feeling guilt about being angry. I remind myself that I would be furious about it happening to one of my friends. So why not be angry that it happened to me? I let it hang around until it fades. When the anger goes away, I feel like I used it to protect myself.
Thank you doctor! About self discipline, why do some of us, have this extremes of some times in life being too strict to ourselves, and other times being totally collapsed and unable to to nothing??
I think maybe our pendulums are swinging too hard either direction without ever finding a place of healthy balance. We get burnt out from our own harsh self-discipline, so we move into a state where we can’t accomplish anything. Then when we finally recover enough to gather any momentum we feel so guilty for our lack of motion for that time of healing that we try to force ourselves too harshly to make up for that lost time. The pendulum knocks from side to side, never finding balance between momentum and peace…
I’ve never considered using SMART goals with regards to reparenting oneself, but it really feels like a great fit since it allows you to reflect more accurately and have a kinder, nonjudgmental “dialogue” with yourself and the outcomes or hindrances.
This was brilliant. I love how it presents concrete, practicable, actionable strategies but combined with self compassion. And your pleasant speaking manner is very motivating, models calm confidence. Thank you.
I went through weeks of drawing a tree...all different kinds of trees. I thought it was odd because I don't normally draw, but it did something for me. I am now learning to self care. It's been difficult. I tend to over work myself and forget to eat. Thank you for these great example.
Thank you 🙏🏼 Your videos are amazing! Spot on! 👏👏 i’m realizing that I’m attracting the same person over and over again in my life because of the lack of protection that I received as a child. Please keep producing these videos. I appreciate your work.
I have decided to do this just recently but didn’t really know how to start. I was basically just telling myself to be kinder when I notice myself doing the negative habits I acquired from my childhood. Thank you for your video, Barbara. I will apply these and keep in mind to not judge myself if not done “perfectly”.
Thank you so much for this wonderful information and your voice is so soothing. I’ve been in trauma therapy for 15 months and trying to wrap it up soon. These tips are great and I took notes. Subscribed too. 😊
I'd love to know how this works with ADHD and other neurorodivergence forms. I feel like no one I've read/heard talk about re-parenting really addresses the specific complications of being neurodivergent.
thank you so much for this invaluable information it's incredibly generous of you to offer this for free. I wrote the word daughter on my wrist, thinking of myself as my daughter conjures more compassion for myself than I've ever been able to cultivate in any other exercise
Great timing . . . I'm just getting started reparenting myself in one critical area that was originally done inadequately. Thank you for the helpful tips and advice to help me along. Your work is appreciated greatly.
Thanks for letting me know. I do think practical steps can help so much, and in my area, sometimes they are forgotten. I'm glad to know they resonated.
I agree; practical examples make an enormous difference! It makes it easier to imagine how and what we might build upon, rather than a nebulous “maybe I’ll figure that out at some point” approach!
Hi Barbara, I love your videos. You are kind and supportive. Thank you! I have a question about self-care. I grew up with a malignant N father and covert narcissistic mother. I was patented by shame and trained to be hard on myself and block my needs and wants. Although I intellectually want to take care of myself, I find it hard to stick to it and actually want to do it. I hope it makes sense. I feel that I’m depriving myself if I don’t let myself indulge - sometimes I eat junk and binge watch videos like this. It’s so hard to go to bed on time. I have small kids and all I get is an hour or two to myself if they fall asleep ok.
Hi: I believe our self-care is blocked by our negative core beliefs, and growing up with narcissistic parents definitely gives us negative core beliefs! I address this in both of my online programs - it takes some work to recover from this. In particular, the boundary program might be of interest: www.awakenjoy.life/boundary
I just love the simple way you speak... And also the easy 5 steps or 3 steps structures of your videos... I need this is tiny easy to achieve structure, otherwise is sometimes too much... So thank you, I love it! 🤗❤️ I needed to create a spa structure in my house, so that I wake up around clean towels, oils, and salt lamps... I also love my white medical clothes to work as a masseuse... I love structure... I have had hard times in finding the balance in my nutrition, so that my healing crisis are not so abrupt or disordered to take so much time or emotions to recompose my lack of balance, otherwise my face turns out red, etc... Need to work harder on that... I am taking care of my sleep with guided meditation, binaurial beats... I live on a 4th floor, so, even if I don t want to workout... I have to, which is ok... Before I would exaggerate my view about what is working out, now I balanced it to a reasonable, normal workout... A walk at the park or beach... Or just go downstairs, specially in winter in rainy days, not to go on guilt trips for things are not my fault or responsability. I live in a quite safe place. I am working emotional validation through diaphragmatic exercises and need to work harder on validating some emotions like impotence for things we can not change, or lack of interest at times, or even self abandonment at times... Or simply validate and regulate even my view about these things. It s a lot of work. For example, I love romantic comedies, or movies, yet even that I use as part of my visualization exercises for my future, etc... Sometimes comes a bit retraumatization, but desensibilization is a word I learned in your video about emdr... However, I went to many guilt trips, as maybe I misunderstood some videos on youtube about not being focus on reality and so on, yet... I am very visual, I love to see images, colors that link me to well emotions, but also ideas for my future and present.. A nice wedding or events.... I love to observe the decoration and so on... And honestly this balances my moods... My self talk is getting better and also in one of your videos you spoke about some ideas for kind of preparing for your personal workout somehow eased my mind to not be to rigid about discipline, learnin new skills, etc... I feel I am being a good, loving mother to myself... And again, finding the time or ease in your mind in which you can absorve and feel good about all this work without guilt trips or too much weight is also a challenge... Walk the walk... Getting there... Thank you! I love your kind, loving, easy going videos!!! 🙋♀️🤗🌷❤️
Would you consider watching series/movies as part of self care? I'm not sure how best I should unwind myself daily. Or what is my 'play' time daily? As a kid I didn't play much..
Yes, some adults need to learn how to play. Many people feel that watching series and movies helps them relax - I'm a bit conflicted on that to be honest. Perhaps try something a little sillier? Even using crayons or a coloring book.... skipping... something you are doing that doesn't have a goal or really a purpose.... Hope that is helpful.
Sorry to hear that. Sometimes we need to develop our own inner cheerleader. I use the term Inner Coach in this video, but similar concept: ua-cam.com/video/-XoWTR3FW44/v-deo.html
I just started reparenting myself. I imagine that I’m a five year old. I take some time in my days to color with crayons , read picture books, color pokemon coloring books, play with playdough and watch cartoons. I’ve been feeling very calm and relaxed ever since.
This is beautiful. I didn't know what I coul do. But this has given me ideas and I'm going to have a go. Thank you!
I have been reparenting myself for the past 2 years and it has changed my life I have a relationship with my inner child my consciousness being the parent my I inner child I regard as my son, being everything else. Thoughts emotions intentions feelings etc And I love my inner child and he is now being expressed in how I treat others because if you treat your inner child who is yourself with love and kindness with complete acceptance especially regarding your wounded inner child it allows your wounded inner child to become healed as you acknowledge and accept your woundedness, feelings experience etc.
I think it's very kind of you to have put up these video's to give people the potential to improve their lives. It's a great opportunity to gain a better understanding of how we process our lives through our childhood conditioning, and the potential is there, through hard work, to move past what was lacking/neglected/unwanted and live a more joyful adult life. Thanks so much. x
Thanks. I’m so glad you are finding the material meaningful!
Spot on 😊
Your welcome
5:01 5:04 5:08
8:20
A thing I think is related to negative self talk is feeling guilt about being angry. I remind myself that I would be furious about it happening to one of my friends. So why not be angry that it happened to me? I let it hang around until it fades. When the anger goes away, I feel like I used it to protect myself.
Thank you doctor! About self discipline, why do some of us, have this extremes of some times in life being too strict to ourselves, and other times being totally collapsed and unable to to nothing??
I think maybe our pendulums are swinging too hard either direction without ever finding a place of healthy balance. We get burnt out from our own harsh self-discipline, so we move into a state where we can’t accomplish anything. Then when we finally recover enough to gather any momentum we feel so guilty for our lack of motion for that time of healing that we try to force ourselves too harshly to make up for that lost time. The pendulum knocks from side to side, never finding balance between momentum and peace…
I’ve never considered using SMART goals with regards to reparenting oneself, but it really feels like a great fit since it allows you to reflect more accurately and have a kinder, nonjudgmental “dialogue” with yourself and the outcomes or hindrances.
This was brilliant. I love how it presents concrete, practicable, actionable strategies but combined with self compassion. And your pleasant speaking manner is very motivating, models calm confidence. Thank you.
I went through weeks of drawing a tree...all different kinds of trees. I thought it was odd because I don't normally draw, but it did something for me. I am now learning to self care. It's been difficult. I tend to over work myself and forget to eat. Thank you for these great example.
Thank you 🙏🏼 Your videos are amazing! Spot on! 👏👏 i’m realizing that I’m attracting the same person over and over again in my life because of the lack of protection that I received as a child. Please keep producing these videos. I appreciate your work.
This is gold, thank you. Watched, taken notes, hope to be back with results in a few weeks.
Yes, I'd love to hear how it goes!
Great video. Watched the whole thing and even took notes. Thanks Barbara.
Thank you! So pleased you found it useful!
Thank so much you are great teacher you explain everything perfectly well and understandable, thanks 💐🌟
You're very welcome and thanks for letting me know!
What a great discovery! I’ve subscribed and will be checking out everything related to this practical, useful channel. Thank you!
You are very welcome, and welcome to the channel!
Great topic! I will use the SMART goal technique to cut down time spent on scrolling social media at night and get better sleep. Thank you Barbara!
Awesome!
This is great topic about reparenting yourself. I thought about parenting my kids but not myself. Thank you.
Awesome!
I have decided to do this just recently but didn’t really know how to start. I was basically just telling myself to be kinder when I notice myself doing the negative habits I acquired from my childhood. Thank you for your video, Barbara. I will apply these and keep in mind to not judge myself if not done “perfectly”.
Thank you so much for this wonderful information and your voice is so soothing. I’ve been in trauma therapy for 15 months and trying to wrap it up soon. These tips are great and I took notes. Subscribed too. 😊
You are welcome. So glad it was helpful. Welcome to the channel!
I'd love to know how this works with ADHD and other neurorodivergence forms. I feel like no one I've read/heard talk about re-parenting really addresses the specific complications of being neurodivergent.
ADHD is a typical occurrence in those who have had a difficult childhood. The steps in this video are absolutely appropriate for people with ADHD.
thank you so much for this invaluable information it's incredibly generous of you to offer this for free. I wrote the word daughter on my wrist, thinking of myself as my daughter conjures more compassion for myself than I've ever been able to cultivate in any other exercise
Thank you for sharing such a great suggestion! I think that is beautiful :)
Great timing . . . I'm just getting started reparenting myself in one critical area that was originally done inadequately. Thank you for the helpful tips and advice to help me along. Your work is appreciated greatly.
How wonderful that you are moving forward with this, and I'm so glad the videos are helping! Wishing you health and healing.
Thank you so much for sharing practical examples. Very helpful
Thanks for letting me know. I do think practical steps can help so much, and in my area, sometimes they are forgotten. I'm glad to know they resonated.
I agree; practical examples make an enormous difference! It makes it easier to imagine how and what we might build upon, rather than a nebulous “maybe I’ll figure that out at some point” approach!
Thanks for your generosity in sharing your wisdom and knowledge in a very clear and simple way which demistifies therapy approaches and applications.
This was so awesome ! Really gave me a new perspective on life and how I should organize my daily goals. Thank you so much for your work!
Wow - I am so glad to hear that! That is what I was hoping for when I made this video,
Thank you 🙏🏾 These are very helpful exercises! Reparenting is a really tough journey. It does take a lot of dedication and consistency.
Thanks so much. Been training for years but this is my last boss i just cant beat
This was wonderul! Thank you! Can't wait to try these. 🙏🏼
This video is highly highly appreciated. ❤ Thank you so much!
Thank you 🙏🏻 i needed this
You are very welcome. Wishing you health and healing :)
Hi Barbara, I love your videos. You are kind and supportive. Thank you! I have a question about self-care. I grew up with a malignant N father and covert narcissistic mother. I was patented by shame and trained to be hard on myself and block my needs and wants.
Although I intellectually want to take care of myself, I find it hard to stick to it and actually want to do it. I hope it makes sense. I feel that I’m depriving myself if I don’t let myself indulge - sometimes I eat junk and binge watch videos like this. It’s so hard to go to bed on time. I have small kids and all I get is an hour or two to myself if they fall asleep ok.
Hi: I believe our self-care is blocked by our negative core beliefs, and growing up with narcissistic parents definitely gives us negative core beliefs! I address this in both of my online programs - it takes some work to recover from this. In particular, the boundary program might be of interest: www.awakenjoy.life/boundary
Thank you so much ❤
You are welcome!
Thank you for your help
You are welcome!
Excellent video.enjoyed thoroughly. Sharing with my friends
Awesome, thank you!
You are w life changer...
💐
I just love the simple way you speak... And also the easy 5 steps or 3 steps structures of your videos... I need this is tiny easy to achieve structure, otherwise is sometimes too much... So thank you, I love it! 🤗❤️
I needed to create a spa structure in my house, so that I wake up around clean towels, oils, and salt lamps... I also love my white medical clothes to work as a masseuse...
I love structure... I have had hard times in finding the balance in my nutrition, so that my healing crisis are not so abrupt or disordered to take so much time or emotions to recompose my lack of balance, otherwise my face turns out red, etc... Need to work harder on that...
I am taking care of my sleep with guided meditation, binaurial beats...
I live on a 4th floor, so, even if I don t want to workout... I have to, which is ok... Before I would exaggerate my view about what is working out, now I balanced it to a reasonable, normal workout... A walk at the park or beach... Or just go downstairs, specially in winter in rainy days, not to go on guilt trips for things are not my fault or responsability.
I live in a quite safe place.
I am working emotional validation through diaphragmatic exercises and need to work harder on validating some emotions like impotence for things we can not change, or lack of interest at times, or even self abandonment at times... Or simply validate and regulate even my view about these things. It s a lot of work. For example, I love romantic comedies, or movies, yet even that I use as part of my visualization exercises for my future, etc... Sometimes comes a bit retraumatization, but desensibilization is a word I learned in your video about emdr... However, I went to many guilt trips, as maybe I misunderstood some videos on youtube about not being focus on reality and so on, yet... I am very visual, I love to see images, colors that link me to well emotions, but also ideas for my future and present.. A nice wedding or events.... I love to observe the decoration and so on... And honestly this balances my moods...
My self talk is getting better and also in one of your videos you spoke about some ideas for kind of preparing for your personal workout somehow eased my mind to not be to rigid about discipline, learnin new skills, etc...
I feel I am being a good, loving mother to myself... And again, finding the time or ease in your mind in which you can absorve and feel good about all this work without guilt trips or too much weight is also a challenge... Walk the walk... Getting there...
Thank you!
I love your kind, loving, easy going videos!!! 🙋♀️🤗🌷❤️
I’m so glad my videos are meaningful for you! Thank you so much for letting me know!! Wishing you health and healing, Barbara
Would you consider watching series/movies as part of self care? I'm not sure how best I should unwind myself daily. Or what is my 'play' time daily? As a kid I didn't play much..
Yes, some adults need to learn how to play. Many people feel that watching series and movies helps them relax - I'm a bit conflicted on that to be honest. Perhaps try something a little sillier? Even using crayons or a coloring book.... skipping... something you are doing that doesn't have a goal or really a purpose.... Hope that is helpful.
Thanks that's a helpful pointer..
Great video . Thank you 👋
Thanks!! So glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you 👏👏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Thank you for the helpful video! Thank you!
You're very welcome!
It was very helpful for me.
So glad to hear that!
Thank you.. ❤️❤️❤️
You're welcome 😊
Smart goals for sleep
Me watching this video at 10:45pm in my bed 😅🤣
thank yo for uploading it.
You're welcome
What should I do if i am the toxic person in my life???
Get therapy.
👏👏👏thank you
You're welcome 😊
i have a question, can you cure anxiety, like in feel the way you felt before starting to have anxiety?
I would say yes. Obviously there are some complications to this question, but people can and do overcome anxiety!
Boundaries I need help with.
how to parenting yourself for a bath just the basics things??
I wish you'd answer this one. Some people are frozen here.
Why is it called reparenting ? We just fend for ourselves . Ok . Now I got it. I sleep.Thank you. 👍🏻
It’s to change the bad programming you got when you were a child, and replace it with good programming.
Simply put, I lack a cheerleader.
Sorry to hear that. Sometimes we need to develop our own inner cheerleader. I use the term Inner Coach in this video, but similar concept:
ua-cam.com/video/-XoWTR3FW44/v-deo.html
This is wonderful! Thank you
You're so welcome!