This man is a gift from the divine. Please donate if you’re able to. He doesn’t use ads on his videos and he simplifies everything so we can now do the work if we don’t have a therapist and if we are able to seek one we would know what to look for. All my life I’ve never felt safe. Now I know how that manifested and the work to do. I am forever indebted ❤
This man is so caring to give this info out for free. We who have CT suffer so much. Most therapist dont get this stuff. Mr Fletcher is truly living like Christ and showing mercy and compassion. THANK YOU Mr Fletcher
Wow, this came at the perfect moment. After so many weeks of battling anxiety and this constant danger I finally feel free and able to do anything again. God bless you Tim
This is a wonderful teaching tool. I learned vagus nerve exercises on you tube, there are many. It was a game changer to reset the nervous system and take away the chronic anxiety that was just a reflex in my nervous system since childhood
Thanks for all you do. I'm beginning to realize I've been in this "reptillian" mode lots of times I went out in the world and the only guaranteed way to feel safe was being alone or forgo interaction. I only feel at ease with people that exude "safeness" to me, everyone else I perceive as at least slightly intimidating so I have to appease them somehow. Outsourcing my safety like this to others has proven to be harmful to myself in the long run and to people that care about me. So thanks again for enlighting me, mr. Fletcher.
This makes total sense - I experienced intense narcissistic abuse for 2 years and was in constant fight or flight mode. My physical and mental health suffered. Even after I removed the hideous narc from my life I was still constantly on edge and physically nervous and jumpy - the slightest thing would startle me. It is taking a long time but I’m starting to heal now 🙏 🕊 💕
This presentation was superbly done. Information was presented at an even pace, not too fast, and having slides with key point and illustrations -just great, and much appreciated. I say this as an education professional. I have seen other so-called experts give out a firehose volume and pace of information that cannot be properly absorbed by their audience.
You are a blessing, Tim. I foresee your channel going over 1 million subscribers. Thank you for getting this good stuff out to people. I much appreciate your Bible lessons at the end. You are an excellent teacher, my friend. God bless you!!!
I gotta recommend Mike Chang's morning flow routine. It's an exercise that i have been using for a few years. Often when in flashback mode i can go days or weeks without exercising (because i live in a van and sometimes there's zero stability or routine at all), and having this exercise routine in my toolbox has saved me so many times, and it's so relaxing in that because I've done it so many times as i follow along i can switch off my thinking and worrying and go into a flow state. It's truly genius.
What an amazing thing.. I told doctor my vagus nerve hurts... They loughed... So cool for me and not so for healing industry. Beautiful teaching and so clear to understand... If you want to. Thank you
This makes so much sense now! I thought I was just broken because despite my progress, I keep reverting to old habits and ways of thinking. It is no wonder that I keep getting triggered and sliding back to the sympathetic and dorsal state since that is what was considered normal to my brain and body for so long.Thank you for helping raise awareness on the effects of complex trauma and sharing valuable knowledge towards healing.
Finally I have a clear picture of the polyvagal theory and the retraining of the vagal nerve. I have been picking things up from different resources but I couldn't put them together. I feel like if I just finish a huge puzzle although it was Tim, not me. Thank you. God bless you all. ❤
I just wanted to thank you Mr. Tim!! You have brought so much revelation about the “why” I’ve acted, reacted and behaved the way I have. Thank you for the clear, calm, concise way you deliver healing ❤️🩹
I love how you explain everything. I've learnt soo much from you. You have really helped me understand more about the trauma I've experienced! One thing I notice about myself is that I hold my breath. I think this is a safety issue! I haven't felt safe for years at a deep level. No I realise why. I also realise how shame has crippled me for year's. What an insight that is and how debilitating that is! Thank-you for sharing your wisdom. Blessings ❤
Thank you for sharing these lectures. It is super helpful for the group of us suffering from these unexplainable dysautonomia symptoms that take hold of our bodies.
My right vagus nerve was severed 35 years ago in order to remove a brain tumor attached to it. Only lately I am suspecting that it may help explain my Fibromyalgia and disregulation as my body keeps score on the traumatic stress in my life. The literature, of course. Is sparse on the connection and I am grateful for you addressing this. You have been a Godsend.
Excellent information to help people stuck in a fight or flight state or depression. It’s a guide on how the body works and what methods you can use to counter negative states.
Finding people to have deep meaningful conversations with is also a challenge seeing as most people think i am to deep, i have not yet met anyone around me who is doing any inner work, it is only people on the internet, most don't get me at all, and do not want to delve into their inner world, but rather ignore it for entertainment or work on the outside.
We can heal and be in our right mind again, that's for sure, however the affects the trauma had on my body well that's something I am still working on, I would say I am partly healed yet still in a much better place mentally which helps, and calmer, less bogged down by the past events having acknowledge d them.
@@nikkibaxter5550 I was diagnosed on the autistic spectrum and its tuff for me to find deep connection. I was also adopted at the age of 7 months and before hand my birth mother gave birth to me and I was put right away in an orphanage. I feel because of this there was a connection bond that was broken. I thank U for your reply and I hope U continue to make progress in your healing journey.
Sorry to hear you went through that, not having that initial emltional.attachment to the mother does affect the child, my niece although the circumstances were different having be born ill she had to stay in hospital for two years and that defo damaged the bond with her mother. My mother abandoned me not in the physical as she was in my life, however she abused me, mentally, physically and emotionally being a Narc it is as hard to.grow up not being screwed up. the best thing I did was get away from her in my early twenties, I used Art as a tool to heal painting doodling, is like meditation. I was diagnosed with dyslexia in my mid thirties whilst studying as I was struggling with the written word, I must say that I have improved my writing t skills skin that inner work, I hope the same for you, that you heal from the hurt you went through, and continue to grow spiritually. ..So.we.can shine bright like we were meant to. 😊
Thank you for this extraordinary but direct explanation of the childhood origin of mental health problems and as a map to understanding how to learn how to parent with the kind of safety in environment that babies and kids need to grow up well (authentic and consistently loving connection, no abuse, no neglect). It is so sublime to know that polyvegal theory can assist in recovery of abused people who did not have the safe connection by ONE or ALL parents and adults of influence that we needed. I wonder if LIFT can have a prophylactic approach treating pregnant parents with trauma informed therapy for new parents to be
I watched it several times. Good educational information. Thank you. There's a micro current point stimulation technique for vague nerve treatment and I have a much better idea of why and how it could be helpful. ❤ thanks
all these methods i learned myself and have been doing them since age 5 to about age 15, when you gotta work and get no breaks. Then more stress and more pain, and more abusers joining in.
My parents of 18 years then my big N narc spouse, who conservatively scored a 31 on Hare’s psychopathy checklist (higher, I’m sure, if I knew everything about his double life) almost killed me psychological abuse alone. It’s a miracle I’m still here.
It’s such relief to know the reasons behind your unexplained,wierd and disgusting feelings GOD bless this person for solving the life mystery and puzzles of so many of us I got so relieved now, all this is not my fault, there is a definite reason for every struggle I face It boost my confidence manyfold and now all my problems seem so tiny and insignificant Knowledge ,understanding and awareness are the key for success, happiness and growth
What a huge fount of help you are! I’m so very grateful for you and keep sharing your videos with others. For me, as a Christian, I avoid yoga due to its ties with Hinduism, and if I’m meditating, it should be on the truth of God’s Word, not just chanting or humming. I’m not looking to clear myself of thought, I’m looking to have the fullness of God filling me, changing me, transforming me, so that I become more like Christ.
this is amazing content, I want to express my gratitude for the great work you have produced for us to share, it explains my complex Ptsd and helps me to train as somatic therapist. Thank you , thank you , from the UK
42:56 I tried all the yogurts and saurkrauts and kim chis. they either didn't do much or tasted bad. Then I tried Trader Joes Kim Chi which is delicious and to dull the flavor i covered it with hummus which protected it from digestion long enough to reach LOWER gut (not just upper) which immediately fed the good bacteria which started killing the bad bacteria, this war caused my lower belly to get warm to the touch and i purged for 2 days and kept feeding the war with more kim chi and after the 2nd day the war was over and i stopped purging and my microbiome was completely reset! i eat it a few times a week now for maintenance and there's no purge, i just feel great! (psychedelics and THCA also destroyed my mental illness before this)
Your gut is the epicentre of your being! It's your second brain, your immune system, your alarm system and so on. The best thing I ever studied for this was food!
Yeah it's crazy how the gut affects immunity. I was hospitalised with Salmonella food poisoning once and idk if it was that specifically, but i think since then I've had Neutropenia (v. Low white blood cells, ) I think I read they were somehow linked... but it's strange to see how a stomach bug can affect your blood and overall level of immunity. Pile on the CPTSD stuff and I'm totally cooked 😂
I'm literally a PolyVagal CASE STUDY. Somebody should do a study on me! I have cptsd and have lived in this state for 51 years and have never found relief. ❤❤😢😢
My Doc inserted this Vagus Nerve Stimulator. I noticed the difference about an hour later. Its uncomfortable and very difficult to stay asleep. Ive had it on for 4 days and it will detached in a week.and a half. I git it from my Pain Management Doctor. Not sure if its a trial. I say that because they never gave me any literature or written warnings etc.
I came back in ventral vagal for a day a few years ago and it was amazing, i felt emotions and was connected to people also instinctively knew what was socially appropriate or not. I got out of it because I had a panic attack thinking about death that night, I've just been waiting for it to return since then, i'm building my life, working, getting married, making kids, but i'm empty and don't know who I am. Life is safe but my brain is still "off" except for anxiety. Constantly fawning, or freezing.
I know who you are. Ungrateful. You dont have chronic pain, a life threatning unhealable disease, lying toxic parents, no job. Try to be a good parent instead of a narcisist. You are raising someone to be in a living hell like i am. You are self absorbed.
Moving from central Europe to South East Asia provided me with a non-judgmental and emotionally accommodating company. I know it's not a solution universally available at hand but made me realize that a radical change of environment might be necessary.
38 years of living and I have yet to be able to connect with safe people in a meaningful and sustained way. Nobody has to care about me beyond good manners.
The only Person one can fully trust - 100% - is God. Fear of God is the beginning of Wisdom. Fear of man brings a snare. For me one of the most liberating truths to learn was that one is not supposed to put trust in anyone other than God; this according to Jesus' example: He did not trust people, because he knew what was in them.
Safe people… there are three kind of people you choose from: healthy people , broken people, and damaged people. One has to know how to distinguish them before making a bond or a relationship.
I understand the issue with my statement.... but I sincerely wish I could stay alone and be happy. I wish I were not drawn to social interactions. You say I need some form of deep connection daily and that just seems so impossibly far away. I can barely handle a single day of deep connection once to twice a month. I go bat-crazy and must recluse myself for extended periods of time after I've crossed a certain point. That point is about slightly less than once every 2 weeks. I have daily pseudo connection with Co-workers, except I've trained them to allow me to speak my heart and mind regardless of the consequences. They may not be able to connect with me deeply, but I can still find outlets for my authenticity. Adapted to know others emotions before they do and also to be a master manipulator, I thrive enough here though not as I'd wish.
There is alot of messed up people's out there because I am, because I grew up like that , inside I feel big hurt from life so far, can't hardly wait to leave it , & I'll bet they have the same feelings, loose people's to soon & get beat up too is iffy galore ! how u get alcoholics & drug addiction, who likes getting beat up , nobody , much less inside beat up , y u don't loose your temper & yell at someone, u seriously hurt them , if they love you , u seriously hurt them more ! Because they can't return it , they love u , but u dished it out 💝🚴♀️,
So are we going to ignore there are not enough safe people for each one of us to deeply connect with daily ? For people who escape from abusive environments there are not safe healthy congratulatory people waiting for them at the gates of hell . There are such things are disenfranchisement, stigmatisation, social and economic boundaries that require to be overcome by the traumatised person before being able to connect with anyone . I know every one of us wants and deserves good people in our lives , but not having that and being desperate that You should have it daily is not helpful at all , true love and friendship are rare, let's give ourselves grace.
I may have sensed- even heard danger from the womb. When i was due to be born- i wouldn't come out. They had to induce labor. Mom made a joke that i was too cozy- i think i sensed danger. Looking back- i think i sensed /heard parents argue or fight. I heard it later.
Tim, I truly respect your amazing ability to help us to understand how trauma affects humans. Would you please consider leaving religion out of this? If God is all knowing, then He created us knowing full well He did not have to do this to his children/creation. I believe this causes cognitive dissonance to your followers.
Tim is very much consciously aware that some people are not into his Christian tie ins of his teachings and gives one the opportunity to leave the session prior to without any judgement on his part. Time also understands that There is no ONE FIX FOR ALL and reaches out into all ways he deem possible to provide the understanding that he is trying to convey. It would be wise of you to let go of judging others for the way they do things because of "your" beliefs. You have a CHOICE, use it.
It is very clear a person with complex trauma can never be trusted because they are not stable. They cannot expect to find safe people if they are not safe to be around. God did not create the rest of us to be your therapists. We entered the relationship with you thinking you were normal. Now we have to deal with this.
❤ is this another reason to believe in a benevolent creator? I am not a believer in evolution, but I do believe that we were created for love and healing ❤️🩹 is possible because of the creator.
This man is a gift from the divine. Please donate if you’re able to. He doesn’t use ads on his videos and he simplifies everything so we can now do the work if we don’t have a therapist and if we are able to seek one we would know what to look for. All my life I’ve never felt safe. Now I know how that manifested and the work to do. I am forever indebted ❤
These talks help me so much. I just want to say thank you. 🙏
This man is so caring to give this info out for free.
We who have CT suffer so much. Most therapist dont get this stuff. Mr Fletcher is truly living like Christ and showing mercy and compassion.
THANK YOU Mr Fletcher
I agree! I consider him one of my ‘safe’ supporters 😊
That's WHY I'm always thanking him
Your videos have helped me more than any therapy I’ve been in. Thank you so much for sharing your work.
I totally agree!
Had a psycho moment the other day n remembering Tim's words helped me calm down again
Wow, this came at the perfect moment. After so many weeks of battling anxiety and this constant danger I finally feel free and able to do anything again.
God bless you Tim
This is a wonderful teaching tool. I learned vagus nerve exercises on you tube, there are many. It was a game changer to reset the nervous system and take away the chronic anxiety that was just a reflex in my nervous system since childhood
Tim this is so excellent: clear and concise for the trauma brained .
So much helpful information as always ❤ Immense gratitude! Greetings from Bulgaria! You are such a great support on my healing journey 🙏💕 Blessings 🙏
Thanks for all you do. I'm beginning to realize I've been in this "reptillian" mode lots of times I went out in the world and the only guaranteed way to feel safe was being alone or forgo interaction. I only feel at ease with people that exude "safeness" to me, everyone else I perceive as at least slightly intimidating so I have to appease them somehow. Outsourcing my safety like this to others has proven to be harmful to myself in the long run and to people that care about me. So thanks again for enlighting me, mr. Fletcher.
This makes total sense - I experienced intense narcissistic abuse for 2 years and was in constant fight or flight mode. My physical and mental health suffered. Even after I removed the hideous narc from my life I was still constantly on edge and physically nervous and jumpy - the slightest thing would startle me. It is taking a long time but I’m starting to heal now 🙏 🕊 💕
This presentation was superbly done. Information was presented at an even pace, not too fast, and having slides with key point and illustrations -just great, and much appreciated. I say this as an education professional. I have seen other so-called experts give out a firehose volume and pace of information that cannot be properly absorbed by their audience.
You are a blessing, Tim. I foresee your channel going over 1 million subscribers. Thank you for getting this good stuff out to people. I much appreciate your Bible lessons at the end. You are an excellent teacher, my friend. God bless you!!!
Thanks
I gotta recommend Mike Chang's morning flow routine. It's an exercise that i have been using for a few years. Often when in flashback mode i can go days or weeks without exercising (because i live in a van and sometimes there's zero stability or routine at all), and having this exercise routine in my toolbox has saved me so many times, and it's so relaxing in that because I've done it so many times as i follow along i can switch off my thinking and worrying and go into a flow state. It's truly genius.
Thank you for recommending Mike Changs channel. Its just what I was looking for 😊
@@tracykatrinaobrien6998 awesome!
What an amazing thing.. I told doctor my vagus nerve hurts... They loughed... So cool for me and not so for healing industry. Beautiful teaching and so clear to understand... If you want to. Thank you
You and John Bradshaw are my go to for youtube info. Can't stop here. But it is a good resource. Really appreciate your content.
Also want to recommend Dr.Gabor Mate, & Daniel Mackler on youtube
This makes so much sense now! I thought I was just broken because despite my progress, I keep reverting to old habits and ways of thinking. It is no wonder that I keep getting triggered and sliding back to the sympathetic and dorsal state since that is what was considered normal to my brain and body for so long.Thank you for helping raise awareness on the effects of complex trauma and sharing valuable knowledge towards healing.
Finally I have a clear picture of the polyvagal theory and the retraining of the vagal nerve. I have been picking things up from different resources but I couldn't put them together. I feel like if I just finish a huge puzzle although it was Tim, not me. Thank you. God bless you all. ❤
Thank you Tim 🤗 thank you so very much for all you share
Thanks!
I just wanted to thank you Mr. Tim!! You have brought so much revelation about the “why” I’ve acted, reacted and behaved the way I have. Thank you for the clear, calm, concise way you deliver healing ❤️🩹
I love how you explain everything. I've learnt soo much from you. You have really helped me understand more about the trauma I've experienced! One thing I notice about myself is that I hold my breath. I think this is a safety issue! I haven't felt safe for years at a deep level. No I realise why. I also realise how shame has crippled me for year's. What an insight that is and how debilitating that is! Thank-you for sharing your wisdom. Blessings ❤
Thank you for sharing these lectures. It is super helpful for the group of us suffering from these unexplainable dysautonomia symptoms that take hold of our bodies.
I feel overwhelmed with all the info in this and that there is on healing from trauma and putting it into practice....
You kind sir .... God sent you to help heal us the damaged the broken but not for long!
My right vagus nerve was severed 35 years ago in order to remove a brain tumor attached to it. Only lately I am suspecting that it may help explain my Fibromyalgia and disregulation as my body keeps score on the traumatic stress in my life. The literature, of course. Is sparse on the connection and I am grateful for you addressing this. You have been a Godsend.
This WAS totally for you and me!
I was having so much trouble understanding polyvagal until now. Thanks so much!
Wonderful, lot of awareness regarding how our nervous system work .
Excellent information to help people stuck in a fight or flight state or depression. It’s a guide on how the body works and what methods you can use to counter negative states.
Finding people to have deep meaningful conversations with is also a challenge seeing as most people think i am to deep, i have not yet met anyone around me who is doing any inner work, it is only people on the internet, most don't get me at all, and do not want to delve into their inner world, but rather ignore it for entertainment or work on the outside.
I just posted a auwstuom of what heppens if U don't have any meaningful connections, do you not heal??
We can heal and be in our right mind again, that's for sure, however the affects the trauma had on my body well that's something I am still working on, I would say I am partly healed yet still in a much better place mentally which helps, and calmer, less bogged down by the past events having acknowledge d them.
@@nikkibaxter5550 I was diagnosed on the autistic spectrum and its tuff for me to find deep connection. I was also adopted at the age of 7 months and before hand my birth mother gave birth to me and I was put right away in an orphanage. I feel because of this there was a connection bond that was broken. I thank U for your reply and I hope U continue to make progress in your healing journey.
Sorry to hear you went through that, not having that initial emltional.attachment to the mother does affect the child, my niece although the circumstances were different having be born ill she had to stay in hospital for two years and that defo damaged the bond with her mother.
My mother abandoned me not in the physical as she was in my life, however she abused me, mentally, physically and emotionally being a Narc it is as hard to.grow up not being screwed up.
the best thing I did was get away from her in my early twenties, I used Art as a tool to heal painting doodling, is like meditation.
I was diagnosed with dyslexia in my mid thirties whilst studying as I was struggling with the written word, I must say that I have improved my writing t skills skin that inner work, I hope the same for you, that you heal from the hurt you went through, and continue to grow spiritually. ..So.we.can shine bright like we were meant to. 😊
@@nikkibaxter5550 Thank you for your story and beautiful words!
Wow. Explains my entire life. Thank you!
Thank you for this extraordinary but direct explanation of the childhood origin of mental health problems and as a map to understanding how to learn how to parent with the kind of safety in environment that babies and kids need to grow up well (authentic and consistently loving connection, no abuse, no neglect).
It is so sublime to know that polyvegal theory can assist in recovery of abused people who did not have the safe connection by ONE or ALL parents and adults of influence that we needed.
I wonder if LIFT can have a prophylactic approach treating pregnant parents with trauma informed therapy for new parents to be
I watched it several times. Good educational information. Thank you. There's a micro current point stimulation technique for vague nerve treatment and I have a much better idea of why and how it could be helpful. ❤ thanks
all these methods i learned myself and have been doing them since age 5 to about age 15, when you gotta work and get no breaks. Then more stress and more pain, and more abusers joining in.
Brain lesions from MS...this information is incredibly helpful in regaining Executive Function skills.
My parents of 18 years then my big N narc spouse, who conservatively scored a 31 on Hare’s psychopathy checklist (higher, I’m sure, if I knew everything about his double life) almost killed me psychological abuse alone. It’s a miracle I’m still here.
It’s such relief to know the reasons behind your unexplained,wierd and disgusting feelings
GOD bless this person for solving the life mystery and puzzles of so many of us
I got so relieved now, all this is not my fault, there is a definite reason for every struggle I face
It boost my confidence manyfold and now all my problems seem so tiny and insignificant
Knowledge ,understanding and awareness are the key for success, happiness and growth
This information is so so helpful in my recovery from CT and going back to the normal. Thanks for all the effort you putting to help us.
Tim, you are the GOAT!! Thank you!
I appreciate your videos so much ❤️ thank you for being part my my healing journey. One step at a time 🫶🤟
This is excellent information, thank you, Tim!
Wonderful talk. Many thanks❤
What a huge fount of help you are! I’m so very grateful for you and keep sharing your videos with others. For me, as a Christian, I avoid yoga due to its ties with Hinduism, and if I’m meditating, it should be on the truth of God’s Word, not just chanting or humming. I’m not looking to clear myself of thought, I’m looking to have the fullness of God filling me, changing me, transforming me, so that I become more like Christ.
You can be a Christian and do yoga.
@@melodyr7146I’m glad to see your intelligent respond :)
You could dance in the aisle at church? Idk 🤷♀️
This is the best video out there!
this is amazing content, I want to express my gratitude for the great work you have produced for us to share, it explains my complex Ptsd and helps me to train as somatic therapist. Thank you , thank you , from the UK
I step out in faith and compassion
42:56 I tried all the yogurts and saurkrauts and kim chis. they either didn't do much or tasted bad. Then I tried Trader Joes Kim Chi which is delicious and to dull the flavor i covered it with hummus which protected it from digestion long enough to reach LOWER gut (not just upper) which immediately fed the good bacteria which started killing the bad bacteria, this war caused my lower belly to get warm to the touch and i purged for 2 days and kept feeding the war with more kim chi and after the 2nd day the war was over and i stopped purging and my microbiome was completely reset! i eat it a few times a week now for maintenance and there's no purge, i just feel great! (psychedelics and THCA also destroyed my mental illness before this)
Your gut is the epicentre of your being! It's your second brain, your immune system, your alarm system and so on. The best thing I ever studied for this was food!
Yeah it's crazy how the gut affects immunity.
I was hospitalised with Salmonella food poisoning once
and idk if it was that specifically, but i think since then I've had Neutropenia (v. Low white blood cells, ) I think I read they were somehow linked...
but it's strange to see how a stomach bug can affect your blood and overall level of immunity.
Pile on the CPTSD stuff and I'm totally cooked 😂
Thank you. Very helpful., I wentt to the emergency room and was told by the ER. Doctor that my symptoms were from my vagus nerve. Thank you much .
He is a genius.
I am learning a lot. Tim sounds like a character from Firesign Theatre.
I'm literally a PolyVagal CASE STUDY. Somebody should do a study on me! I have cptsd and have lived in this state for 51 years and have never found relief. ❤❤😢😢
Thank you.
Awesome and thank you 🙏🏼. I will need to listen a few times. But this will help me and many💐💖
This info is priceless. Thank you ❤
My Doc inserted this Vagus Nerve Stimulator. I noticed the difference about an hour later. Its uncomfortable and very difficult to stay asleep. Ive had it on for 4 days and it will detached in a week.and a half. I git it from my Pain Management Doctor. Not sure if its a trial. I say that because they never gave me any literature or written warnings etc.
I came back in ventral vagal for a day a few years ago and it was amazing, i felt emotions and was connected to people also instinctively knew what was socially appropriate or not. I got out of it because I had a panic attack thinking about death that night, I've just been waiting for it to return since then, i'm building my life, working, getting married, making kids, but i'm empty and don't know who I am. Life is safe but my brain is still "off" except for anxiety. Constantly fawning, or freezing.
I know who you are. Ungrateful. You dont have chronic pain, a life threatning unhealable disease, lying toxic parents, no job. Try to be a good parent instead of a narcisist. You are raising someone to be in a living hell like i am. You are self absorbed.
Excellent presentation.
Thank you. Watching from Alaska.
Thank you so much for helping me.
Thank you!😊
I don’t have safe people
I was just thinking the same
Moving from central Europe to South East Asia provided me with a non-judgmental and emotionally accommodating company.
I know it's not a solution universally available at hand but made me realize that a radical change of environment might be necessary.
Exactly
My parents are liars. They were supposed to be safe people.
This video made me realize I fawn
Thank you. I went into a dorsal state after finishing a painting. I'm achievement driven, yet fear punishment for success. It's a nightmare.
What do you mean by older, newer and evolutionary?
Thank you!!!!!!!
Thank you so much you have just disentangled my whole life x❤
Oh my word! How do you know me?? Thank you for the insight and healing tips.
I had this so long that my body is in constant physical pain.
Konflikt /complicated... VPO.. TY!
Abuse - ausgenutz... VPO.. TY!
Engagement is like (verbindungen the form of contact)...VPO.. TY!
Using it also as (gebunden) tight up... VPO.. TY!
Like if someone is married (gebunden) is married... VPO.. TY!
Or has a life partner..
Visualize a safe place, oh, you mean behind the couch.
What if U don't have anyone to got for connection to heal? Then what?
Especially daily... Need a spouse...
38 years of living and I have yet to be able to connect with safe people in a meaningful and sustained way. Nobody has to care about me beyond good manners.
I am forever in flight mode. I have moved too many times to count. I am compelled to run!! So exhausting😔
I go in the back room at work and run my arms under cold cold water
Meeting safe mature people is very hard
The only Person one can fully trust - 100% - is God. Fear of God is the beginning of Wisdom. Fear of man brings a snare. For me one of the most liberating truths to learn was that one is not supposed to put trust in anyone other than God; this according to Jesus' example: He did not trust people, because he knew what was in them.
You should write more. You’re smart.
People can be assholes God warns us
Where was the Christian part?
Could this Fawn response of the PV system be the source of Stockholm Syndrome?
Where are these " safe people" you speak of...
Safe people… there are three kind of people you choose from: healthy people , broken people, and damaged people. One has to know how to distinguish them before making a bond or a relationship.
I understand the issue with my statement.... but I sincerely wish I could stay alone and be happy. I wish I were not drawn to social interactions. You say I need some form of deep connection daily and that just seems so impossibly far away. I can barely handle a single day of deep connection once to twice a month. I go bat-crazy and must recluse myself for extended periods of time after I've crossed a certain point. That point is about slightly less than once every 2 weeks.
I have daily pseudo connection with Co-workers, except I've trained them to allow me to speak my heart and mind regardless of the consequences.
They may not be able to connect with me deeply, but I can still find outlets for my authenticity. Adapted to know others emotions before they do and also to be a master manipulator, I thrive enough here though not as I'd wish.
I have complex ptsd and i have a difficult to be better
There is alot of messed up people's out there because I am, because I grew up like that , inside I feel big hurt from life so far, can't hardly wait to leave it , & I'll bet they have the same feelings, loose people's to soon & get beat up too is iffy galore ! how u get alcoholics & drug addiction, who likes getting beat up , nobody , much less inside beat up , y u don't loose your temper & yell at someone, u seriously hurt them , if they love you , u seriously hurt them more ! Because they can't return it , they love u , but u dished it out 💝🚴♀️,
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It is terrifying to think of connecting with safe people.
I have a lot of anger
So are we going to ignore there are not enough safe people for each one of us to deeply connect with daily ? For people who escape from abusive environments there are not safe healthy congratulatory people waiting for them at the gates of hell . There are such things are disenfranchisement, stigmatisation, social and economic boundaries that require to be overcome by the traumatised person before being able to connect with anyone . I know every one of us wants and deserves good people in our lives , but not having that and being desperate that You should have it daily is not helpful at all , true love and friendship are rare, let's give ourselves grace.
Swimming is my favorite therapy
HOW DO YOU FIND SAFE PEOPLE. I HOPE SOMEONE FROM YOUR STAFF WILL ANSWER. I HAVE NONE!
(not exaggerating)
I can only listen so much before my body aches and I want to get in the car and keep driving😟
I may have sensed- even heard danger from the womb. When i was due to be born- i wouldn't come out. They had to induce labor. Mom made a joke that i was too cozy- i think i sensed danger. Looking back- i think i sensed /heard parents argue or fight. I heard it later.
Tim, I truly respect your amazing ability to help us to understand how trauma affects humans.
Would you please consider leaving religion out of this? If God is all knowing, then He created us knowing full well He did not have to do this to his children/creation.
I believe this causes cognitive dissonance to your followers.
Tim is very much consciously aware that some people are not into his Christian tie ins of his teachings and gives one the opportunity to leave the session prior to without any judgement on his part. Time also understands that There is no ONE FIX FOR ALL and reaches out into all ways he deem possible to provide the understanding that he is trying to convey. It would be wise of you to let go of judging others for the way they do things because of "your" beliefs. You have a CHOICE, use it.
God doesn't do this to his creation. God gifted us free will. Humans choose to do harm.
Watch out for anthropomorphizing God/gods.
There are many meaning related traps when it comes to this.
Humans did not evolve.
"Less human" is not a good wording. Also, incorrect. As well as may be triggering. Otherwise this lecture is great
You know exactly what he means 🙄
It is very clear a person with complex trauma can never be trusted because they are not stable. They cannot expect to find safe people if they are not safe to be around. God did not create the rest of us to be your therapists. We entered the relationship with you thinking you were normal. Now we have to deal with this.
❤ is this another reason to believe in a benevolent creator?
I am not a believer in evolution, but I do believe that we were created for love and healing ❤️🩹 is possible because of the creator.
Thank you, working on creating a safe environment with safe people. So grateful. 🤍
Thanks
I can only listen so much before my body aches and I want to get in the car and keep driving😟