Do men know right away if you're 'girlfriend material?' - Susan Winter
Вставка
- Опубліковано 19 кві 2018
- Viewer Lana writes, “Dear Susan. Thank you so much for your helpful videos. My friends claim that a man knows very quickly whether the woman is girlfriend material or not. Perhaps just after few dates. Could you make a video about this topic? I was seeing a guy who played hot and cold on me, and my friends explained that it is because he knew from the beginning that I am not girlfriend material. Thanks a lot. XX.”
Personal Coaching: www.susanwinter.net/consultation/
Or, call me on Magnifi (on demand answers) itunes.apple.com/us/app/magni...
Join my social media family!
Facebook: / authorsusanwinter
Twitter: / susan_e_winter
As seen on OPRAH, bestselling author/relationship expert Susan Winter (Allowing Magnificence and Older Women/Younger Men) writes, speaks and coaches on evolutionary forms of loving partnership and higher thinking. Media credits include: THE OPRAH SHOW, THE TODAY SHOW, GOOD MORNING AMERICA, ABC/CBS/NBC EVENING NEWS, CNN, BBC, COSMO, HARPERS BAZAAR, PEOPLE, GOOD HOUSEKEEPING, NEW YORK MAGAZINE, THE LONDON TIMES, and THE NEW YORK TIMES. In radio, Susan is a frequent guest on NPR, ABC, PLAYBOY RADIO (Sirius), and CBS NEWS RADIO. She’s also a contributing writer for THE HUFFINGTON POST, and THE GOOD MEN PROJECT. www.susanwinter.net
Its a vibe. Its written all over your face, in your words, and what you choose to wear. The vibe cannot be faked, and its not something that can be worked on in a weekend. Character takes years to build. Having said that, I'm assuming that "girlfriend material" means long term, potential life partner. That's all i've ever looked for.
Andrew Haas How about a vibe of “joy”, “joie de vivre” 😁🌹
Thanks Andrew.
Did you find it?
I'd say wear for the proper occasion, girls can wear sexy (not sluty) in clubs and ladies in church. Don't judege too quickly by appearances.
I wholeheartedly agree. I'm the same with the Life partner.
Me being a guy who knows he has a lot to offer the opposite sex, I can tell you that there are cues I pick up from women which tell me whether or not they are relationship material. To me, trust, loyalty, and maturity are the greatest qualities that a woman can possess. Everything else is a bonus. When I see a woman who can’t stay off of social media for a day, who can’t drink without getting drunk, who seems really insecure, and who constantly needs validation of men in her life, these are all red flags, which tell me there can be no long road with her. A woman who surrounds herself with men (those “he’s just a friend” types), a woman who is quick to anger, if she has double standards, and even something small like putting her phone facedown every time I’m around, these things tell me that I need to not take her so serious. The woman who respects herself, who carries herself well, who isn’t starved for attention, who knows how to communicate like an adult, and who doesn’t show hot and cold behavior, that is a woman worth investing in. Many women just don’t want to hear the reality of how they appear to men. They think that the pool is drying up, that there are no good men out there, and that a good guy it’s hard to find. We are out there, we just want the women who are quality, those are the ones worth having a long life and building a family with. If you’re a girl who would rather get blackout drunk and play around on Snapchat every day, you just have to accept what you get. And yes, I understand that there are things that men do which turn women off too.
Erich Allen Sounds great, thank you so much for sharing this... I wonder what else I can work on, besides having the trust, loyalty and maturity... The fact that I work and market Fitness has me wearing Fitness wear a lot... I also wear formal clothes, but I don’t see the difference in how a quality man perceives me. I think that it all comes down to “are we a match?”
What a lovely response! You’re right, it’s simple: people don’t realise that their self perception is not the same as how they’re actually perceived.
Also you’re super cute! 😘
Erich Allen I was looking for your latest response, and I can’t find it... Thank you very much & maybe you can Messenger it to me on Facebook? With Susan’s permission, of course 👌🏼 Or better yet, send me the exact link, since UA-cam only led me to the video that has so many comments!
Hi Monica, I actually deleted it recently, out of respect for my ex. I do realize that it seemed a bit crass of me, and I didn't want to portray the relationship as only having a potential equal to what I stated.
Having said that, the basic scope of it was that I had only come to know my likes and dislikes better, because of the experience. Hope it helps :)
Erich Allen Damn I love your comment and completely agree with everything..well said my friend.👏🏻👌🏻💥🏆
In my personal experience, it takes me a long while (give or take 2-3 months) to realise that the person I'm attracted to is the person i want to move forward and invest in. There have been several occasions where I initially judged someone as not being right for me where later I fell in love.
Great advice, I've got to the stage in my life where I refuse to psycho-analyse whether I am girlfriend material in his eyes. I'm so focused on my purpose that if he doesn't like me enough to date me, I will be ok.
Lol I LOVE that! Good for you! The same here :).
exactly! :-)
Paulette Myers yes!!!
Paulette Myers lol, you will 100% change your mind AFTER you hit your SMV "The Wall".
Yup!! I agree 👍
As a guy everything Susan said is absolutely true. I was looking for her to go wrong on something but she didn't.
Thank you anon
Yeah Susan continually amazes me with being dead on accurate with everything she says.
So many guys have walked away when I said no to sex on the first date. Good riddance to bad rubbish. I want nothing from a man who doesn't respect me.
So, having sex is a disrespectful act? Good to know....
@@KotsarisGR I guess "on the first date" bit escaped your attention? Lmao
@@KotsarisGR
Having sex is not direspectfull.
Having sex on a 1st date is an unrespectfull wish from a man.
Having sex for a man is having sex.
Having sex for a woman is more life changing and with more serious consequences. Is it not?
Men, who are frustrated, when women refuse sex is a little freaky. When they not even know you and not even knowing your character, intentions and so on.
What would a woman say to a child, when she tells him/her...
I had sex on the 1st, 2nd, 3d...and so on encounter with a man? And when this man will not stick around after sex. Or sticks around for life, but behaving wrongly or even toxic, unloving.
And the children have to suffer from it.
Sex=putting life in a womans womb basically.
Why would or should she give in like it is an only supperficial fun act?
In the old days and in other countries...
Sex is a serious act.
Not just for fun at all.
Be more consious and think deeper on that one.
Mayme for you, sex is just having FUN.
If you search that, you need to consider other options and pay for it in special places.
Even then...
You should be respectfull and friendly and emotionally safe and collected. Be a gentle man allways.
Bless you.
@@heide-raquelfuss5580 Sex on the first date? Hell No.
2nd date: No
3rd date: No again
Etc..
After Marriage: Yes (finally)
@@heide-raquelfuss5580 thank you. Well said, really 😊
When I hear this glamorous lady talk I feel Im listning to my intuition It's real what she says💎
Yes. I decide after 3 dates. I want a relationship. If she has bad communication, or cant communicate what she wants, does not show she has goals, has her head in the clouds, is unrealistic, then those are dealbreakers for me. I do not want a fixer upper, that does not mean she has to be perfect, but she has to prove she is ready for a deep, meaningful relationship and she has the skills to make it happen. You should ask for no less.
If I did not think that a female was potential relationship material, I did not approach her.
I looked for someone to love, not a pump and dump.
Indeed.
I know for a fact Guys see me as girl friend material and then guys will hold that for a later time when they're ready. In this case, the ship has already sailed and I have no desire to deal with a man who comes back with the Ah Ha moment when it clicks with what he finally wants.
Becca Smith exactly
I'm the same way. It's frustrating though.
It is true.
And a lot of men need 29 years or more to figure things out.
Women can not wait 50 years eiter or even 3 years.
Life goes on and life shortens every day. For every one.
So, women need to realize time is money. But time flies. And it does not come back. Time is the most underrated topic for some.
But the fun part is...
If a man would work and the boss would wait 3 years to pay him, suddenly this kind of men would say...
Ooo no..., my time is valuable, so i want to know if you pay me accordingly in time and so on.
We spend to much our time with men, not knowing what they are suposed to do with you.
Give yourself 5 months max. And figure out if you want him for long term. Having kids with...Marry.
Do not give sex.
Why? Many reasons!
Knowing someone is better.
And see the dangers and red flags too.
Bless you.
This is so true. Happened to me, too. Not just girlfriend material but wife material...
Yes! The moment we get their world view, family dynamic, and overall behavioral patterns, we know immediately.
Yes, knew straight away, after some short-term relationships I met my wife and still together 30 years later.
From my exeperience and other guys I know, girls who possess the opposite of the following qualities are usually dateable:
1) High maintenance girls that demand a lot from a man
2) Girls in high paying jobs who look down on others who work low paying jobs
3) Girls who aren't good conversationalist
4) Girls who are easily offended
5) Girls who are unadventurous
Those are some that come to mind. Obviously a man should expect to be the opposite of these qualities as well. If she has all of the following above.....RUN!
Gee Lee you're right attraction is not a choice it's subconscious but what is a choice is who you love we decide who we love love is not an emotion it's a decision trust me when I tell you this remember one thing when someone shows you who they are believe them I know it hurts and you're disappointed and you feel like your life is falling apart but trust me when I tell you when someone lets you go give them the gift of goodbye your future is never tied to someone that left "rejection is God's way of protection "
Gee Lee your very welcome trust me when I tell i have been there be thankful for the lesson that you learned when someone leaves you it's a blessing why that person does not have what it takes to hang in there through the good and the bad remember this your an eagle the person that left is a chicken don't cry anymore wipe your face and find yourself another eagle ...
Donnie R yeah but it's not that cut and dry. I know women (including myself) that possess all those qualities, opposite from what you listed of course, and there are still an ample number of men out there willing to use you for one night. Having those qualities doesn't even slightly guarantee a woman she'll land a relationship. It's much more complex I think
+kristie lee Possessing the opposite of those qualities just gets your foot in the door for the guys interested in having a girlfriend. It's not going to make a guy whose sole interest is sexual conquest want to stick around. If a guy just wants to sleep with as many women as possible, he's not going to care if you're girlfriend material or not.
However, possessing the qualities Donnie R listed will tend to ward off guys who are actually interested in having a girlfriend. I don't know of any guy who likes the types of qualities he listed, so possessing those qualities (especially possessing all of them at once) is almost guaranteed to lead to a life devoid of long-term relationships.
Another quality you'll need if you want something serious is to learn how to pick the guys who are genuinely open to a long-term relationship. After the sexual revolution, most guys have figured that they're better off just whispering sweet things into a girl's ear to open up her legs and then move on after they've had their fun.
Lol this sounds like many men I've met out there these days also. I guess we all have the same problems.
One of my favorite books that has helped me is called “How to Know if Someone is worth pursuing in Two Dates or less.” Dr. Neil Clark Warren
As an older single man I quickly can make the call, then on the potential ones I look at their actions and words closely over 2-3 times we spend together. What can disqualify, non stop talk of their ex. Talk of all the problems they have with their kids, noticing how they handle money- do they have a clue, last their social media- are they Bar Stars, or is it nothing but selfies of her! Run quickly! If she passes this then it is a question of will you pass her test as boyfriend material!
Thanks James.
I think men not only know right away but try to do it. They love solving puzzles and when I'm on a date I sometimes get the idea I'm being asked questions not to get to know me but to fill a database in a guy's brain to fit a category. Not to mention the ones who already ran a social media background check before they showed up for a date. Offputting, to say the least. I don't know what triggers this in them but my guess is, it's men's obsession with their reputation. They want to score girls, but marry a "nice girl", whatever that means. How many dads are out there who protect their daughters like a hawk while simulteniously hitting on everyone that flies by? Too many. My grandmother who's been married for 50 years once told me she couldn't say that she knew my granddad. Because we are subject to change during the course of the relationship, as well. In my humble opinion, guys who adopt the lifestyle of "as much fun as I can until I find a nice girl to settle down with" end up in miserable marriages and are forced to stay in them for their children. Because guess what? Prim and proper people are pretty standard. That is not to say it's a bad thing, it's just that, it's the quirks and emotional mambo jambo in people that makes them unique, interesting and fun to be around. I don't want to offend anyone here but I've gotten drunk on multiple dates because conversation flew, it was a Saturday night, I was having fun and I felt like it. I only drink outside and not often at that but I'm simply not going to explain that to someone because they should summon the social intelligence, and if they can't, maybe be aware of this shortcoming and not categorize people. I'm also very open about my mental struggles in the past because I don't want people to find out once they started to get attached. It's not because I want to give a "crazy vibe" or overshare. And these mental struggles were caused by things outside my control, so what is my fault there exactly? I read in the comments antidepressants are offputting, apparently. At the end of the day, we all have our preferences and the liberty to pass on people who don't meet certain capacities for us. But to judge a woman, or any human being for that matter, is cruel and counterproductive. Like Susan said, the girl in the club with the slutware might be insecure about being boring and trying to prove to you she knows how to have fun. God knows I've been there and was too scared to say I would rather be snuggled in a blanket and watch a Dr Who marathon. Which is why I find Susan to be extremely helpful since she always advices to stay true to who you are. Luckily, in the era we live in people are more and more accepting and open to other people so this absurdity will be put to bed in a few generations. The only thing I know right now is , I am not going to prove to someone I'm girlfriend material just to get a boyfriend. There is nothing sad about being wined and dined or doing fun activities with a different hot guy every week. I'm prefectly fine being single and a guy has to cherish my quirks to be able to change that.
Thanks for the input Alex, I appreciate you reading through it.
I like what you said. I agree we need to be ourselves and not to play the nice good gf material. Because it would be plain bullshit. And so the women who are actually married are not better than those who are not (yet). Everyone can get married or in a relationship. But not everyone has a great marriage/relationship. In my opinion marriage/relationship needs to be happy and based on truth and two people open-minded and in love (etc...).
Couldn't agree more Aissa! You summarized my rant in kinder words :)
Oh my, a girl dared to show enthusiasm about something she enjoys/wishes to acquire one day. How dare she? I'm appaled. How would you like the same streotype about sports cars? Not cool.
i HAVE seen friends marrying women who act wifey and its totally a different thing.. they are bitter, gossiper etc... I dont know why but I think sometimes men choose superficially...(plz I dont offend huuuu)
When I think of the kind of woman that is girlfriend material I think of the kind of woman I would be proud to introduce to my parents. I usually know within the first or second date if a woman is girlfriend material. If I know a woman isn't girlfriend material I'm not interested in being sexual with her. Ultimately the woman that has caught my eye is someone I tell my mom about. she shows compassion, she shows me she's thinking about me and I do the same for her. These are the kind of things I look for in a girlfriend.
My experience is that young men know a woman is girlfriend material abt. 10 minutes after the 1st meeting (not after the 3rd date !)
I know within a minute, I feel it, it is inexplicable and it is very rare it happens. I have always only been wanted to be involved with real potential girls/ladies in "that way". I don´t like playing games, neither do I like it when being played. Just straight forward, honest and sincere.
I was all in for the woman I thought I was going to marry after the first phone call which lasted 15 mins. I had only one picture and she was wearing sunglasses, so it wasn't looks. It was her energy, communication style, she was fun, just full of life. Unfortunately, a few months later she ended it after appearing to be thinking long-term, too.
But ladies, you want to be in his marriage column. Girlfriend usually means temporary. He knows, he knows. And quickly jumping into bed with him is the worst thing you can do.
To help some of my ladies out there we know if we hold you in that “ love of my life” regard right away, that being said there’s multiple things you can do to usher yourselves into a different place in our minds as Susan states dressing appropriately being really reserved but it all depends on the man’s preference but if you prepare yourself for a relationship and give off those signals someone is bound to find you. Most men are very impulsive including myself we know what we want when we see it and the potential it has no man is playing hot and cold if he’s head over heels, unless it’s instinct or he feels like he can’t get you otherwise.
Indeed.
If a man is head over heels and trustworthy, he will not play hot and cold or do player stuff.
As a woman I think a few things come into play. First what is the man looking for? Then, on both sides, you know pretty quick if the person isn't a fit and then there are the ones who may have potential but you don't have enough information yet. My current issue on the other side of the fence as a woman is finding one who is compatible, there is chemistry, connection and is interesting to me. Good communication is essential in discovering these things. Being open to discovering, being able to honor who the other person is and let go if they aren't for me. I have met some really good men who aren't for me but am happy to have met them.
Susan, You are an amazing woman and I thank the Universe for you❤️👑
You are a girlfriend material its just that you had the wrong guy.
Not always true
Other people aren’t always the wrong one. Sometimes ourselves can be the wrong one and we have to admit it.
"Do men know right away if you're 'girlfriend material?'" - No. I certainly don't. I don't think that any man really does. However some men will act decisively in making a choice of pursuing a particular woman. That doesn't mean that he actually knows. That means he is decisive. Did he 'just know' with three other women previously? 'Knowing' doesn't mean you are right. Being decisive doesn't mean that he is a good man. It might mean that he is optimized for acquiring resources but that doesn't necessarily translate into good relationship material.
For me personally I am not at all decisive by nature. I overthink a lot of things. When women play 'hard to get' I can find a million reasons why I am mis-reading the situation and won't approach. For me I need to have conversations at a higher level in order to know what is going on. For most of the women I have dated they went pretty far in initiating the relationship. Once I was in the relationship and knew their likes and dislikes I was very accommodating but until then any move I make has the potential of offending them so I take little action at all. What is interesting about this is that in my work I am extremely assertive and decisive. It is only with women that I am reticent. Personally I believe I am right in being stern in my vocation and meek in my relations. That is the chivalric standard. This video describes this perfectly using the words of CS Lewis: ua-cam.com/video/GBT9LasyC3E/v-deo.html
Yes....every man knows which woman has a special place in his heart and those who do not.
I think for the 1st or 2nd date you can quite quickly find out if the person is NOT a relationship material, to truly find out if they ARE, it's gonna take some time until you see their true colours.
1st date you can tell. If you really probe enough. People aren't complicated.
Erich Ellen thanks for your input. Those are the same things I look for in a man. Those are very genuine and good things to look for and in a person. If you can find a person who has those things they will help make your relationship last longer.
Yes I know know right away if a woman is girlfriend material. It is how she talks with me in conversations. Her body language tells the truth. As a man, I do not run away, I embrace it.
I always ask myself "would I kiss this man?"
Susan absolutely beautiful video and yes you are correct men know within the first date if this woman could potentially be his girlfriend or future wife especially after being single for a little while and you actually discover yourself and you as a man are ready to settle down we know we know what works for us and what doesnt I've been on so many dates with women that are literally interviewing me they're not trying to get to know me they're literally running down like interview questions and to me it's such a turn-off because the essence of somebody is their heart it has nothing to do with anything else one thing I am going to add to help women out men are very very basic but you have to find a man at the right stage in his life you can't turn a man into something he does not want to be or he's not ready to if you meet a man and he just wants to be single and date multiple women that's not boyfriend material he's showing you the stage of his life at that moment a lot of people take things personal but you are right this woman that you speak of might have been girlfriend material but because the man at the stage of his life he does not want to commit and settle down because let's be honest there's not a whole lot of incentive for us to do that he ran away but everything you said in your video Miss Susan your spot on I was trying to find something wrong but no men know right away not multiple dates they know within the first date if this woman could be their partner.....
Us ladies are are busy checking a guy out from minute 1 if he is dating material...... most dont cut it tho😆
Unfortunately this is true.
But sometimes it takes a while, to understand we women need to do this. Otherwise you lose your years and chances.
I found out sadly...
In most cultures...
When you as a woman, are 25 your chances that a man wants you for marriage/starting a family is drastically reduced. After 27 it is more to 0.
That opened my eyes.
But my eyes are totally opened to late.
😔😳😟😭😢😥
Bless you.
I love your Videos ❤ thank you so much!!
Brava Susan, brava!! Brilliant.
We know quickly on if you’re relationship material, however I wonder how many have blown possible relationships because they presented what they think we want to see instead of just being themselves. In my experience I see way too many who are not “real”
If everything you say and do is calculated and presented, how can I know I like who you really are? I acknowledge this behaviour works both ways.
In my humble opinion, such a pretending behavior just shows insecurity in a woman... Right away instead of being to equal human beings, she puts some guy on a pedestal and trying to "convince" him to like her...
Lots of love Suzan. Thank you very much. 💙💙
Oh yes. If you know what you want and you come across them you will persue them.
Dear Susan, Thank you for taking time to make videos and sharing your knowledge with us. I can only imagine how many people bless you for help them. And personally I am very thankful to you for everything. You helping me to go thru the worse break up and time period of my life. I have a question, how do you know if she is *Wife Material* ?
Susan u are genius. U are a love scientist. Two thumbs up
Thank u for sharing this to us.
Real men do, it’s just life. Real women would know at sight if a man is boyfriend material. First impressions matter a great deal, ALWAYS.
I love the guy comments. It gives me hope!
Hi susan another valuable video & you are right they know from the first interaction if you are girlfreind material if they are prepared if not they could play hot & cold as with the case of the lovely lady who ask you.thank you for ur mature analysis.
Ghada G
If you like them you like them. What you wear, what you look like, what you act like. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Love this woman, she is so intelligent 💘
Yes I tend to agree Susan.
Okay, why are there thumbs down on your video. You have extensive knowledge of relationships.🙋🙋Great Video and I've learned so much from watching your videos. I plan on having a one on one session with you when my baby gets a little older😇😇🙋🙋
Great video, from a different 'Lana'. :)
GOD! You are amazing woman! your videos are everything!
Most of the time the answer is yes. But when you deal with women that are going into it with the intentions of being deceitful, then no. But in a few weeks, the truth comes out. I'm an attractive man and I keep running into women that want my attention and company, but not a relationship. I tell them from day one I want a relationship.
As men we are the pursuers so my first impression of you happens before you know we are looking at you. While your first impression of me happens when I introduce myself more so. Even if you saw me prior to that moment.
To lower risk we are not going to engage with someone that doesn't look like what we want, in this case girlfriend material. As old school as it sounds if I look at you and I think you are currently presentable enough to meet my parents(or friends or whoever's opinion I value) that is a good sign. So ask yourself that. Beyond the look(while keeping that same principle in mind) when you speak do you sound like you would be presentable enough to meet my loved ones. Are you in a place in life? What were you actually doing when I approached you? Shaking your a** somewhere or drinking coffee or reading(just some random and blatantly different examples)
Those things we look at to make this judgement.
I like your videos Susan. Men posture a lot even in their words, men may lie before or even while telling the truth (ponder that).
Men do for the most part know because we usually assign a certain status. The status is malleable depending on what the woman is giving off. The status is mostly hers to lose as men assume the women is perfect when of course no one is. I'm sure women assume things about men too at times.
Most of the time yes, and within a few dates certainly. There are always exceptions though and sometimes things can be a slow burner or even no attraction at all at the beginning
I knew I could live with my wife before we even talked (strangely) and when we finally dated for a mere 2 weeks (due to distance), I didn't think the romantic chemistry was there and was ready to move on. But a miraculous vision showed me something about her, which I wanted immediately. Still without that chemistry, we soon married and were very VERY happy (two easy going people). Six months into our marriage she got into a car rollover, broke her neck and became quadriplegic from the neck down. I gave up my career and goals to be her personal caregiver for over 30+ years until 22 months ago when breast cancer took her.
Although, we couldn't have fun like other couples, we had each other and I miss and love her more than life itself.
So, you never know what can happen, even if there's no real butterflies at first.
More proof you are THE BEST!
Spot on👏🙌💫
Sometimes we do but sometimes we don't. But I think we do mostly if we are good at reading vibe. But for me , I took time to figure out.
Oh, thank gawd you said it, Susan
I don't have enough information to gauge. It's all about Honesty, Trust, Communication, Personality, Vibes emitted, and presentation. Are your words and actions consistent? I don't view GF material. I view Attributes for possible Wife.
I've always been one to let things happen naturally. I just be myself. I prefer that she acts herself. Some particular actions by her in discussions can turn me off.
Yes I know within the first date or two
Thanks for ur very useful videos!,could u create another new video telling us girls if men boys that just wish an adventure or that see us not a relationship material for him if they can change his mind with the time? or just after sex?,thanks.
Answer is yes and we can be wrong too. In first meeting/date I can say if said girl is at least short term girlfriend material or only a fling. And as Susan said, we can make a misjudgement too. It takes me several meetings to know if they can actually be a longer term girlfriend material. But even a few months might not be enough to know if someone is to live with or have children with. It depends in how much wisdom and clarity of perception we have.
I look at how a man stays true to his words and if his actions align, then maybe I can trust him. If he's not a porn addict, have a stable career, doesn't stay on social media alot then he is in fact longterm material. Lol.
Susan, this relates back to the woman who stated so many men she meets are interested in taking her to bed. I honesty think women take that as a compliment instead of realizing he has already determined he is not interested in her for a long term relationship. I think most men would agree with that and most women don't get that! We all subconsciously emit ourselves and men can read us like a book.
Indeed.
If i know a man wants directly to go to bed. I freak out inside. And do not want to see him again. Because i know this man wants sex fun. And i know is not long term husband material either.
I allways think he is just spreading his genes everywhere. Not very appealing.
@@heide-raquelfuss5580 that's not all he's spreading, lol, Ewwww. 😷🤣
@@SpaceCadet4Jesus you are right! I forgot other things to mention here🤓🙈🙉🙊
Thank you for realizing and explaining this video humanely from a guys point of view. 🙂
I appreciate that.
No l did not ran away from my woman but l kept her in my 💓 and keeping her in my mind l talking to her reference
Yes, men know when they meet The One!
Dear Susan. I am a good woman . Everybody around me knows I am hard worker woman. I have many men crazy for me . But every time I pick one . Seems like they are so excited . But few days later all that magic is go away. I been divorce twice . My first husband was alcoholic, second was a narcissist. I been divorced for three years . I know now many things about myself . Please talk more about more what to say or act when we meet them . I try to be so nice to them I may scare them away ? Maybe they think I am needing. Sorry for my English. Spanish is my primary language
2 divorces, seems like you don't know how to pick the right guy and you rush into big decisions, that's a huge red flag to men.
I have the same problem. I'm nice to guys, but this seems to scare them away!
@@monp.4903 THAT struck a cord!! It makes sense now, why men run from me. It's all in the past for me, many lessons learned from the bad. How to get them to see that I don't make bad choices now, I need some criticizing, from other peoples point of view of me. Self-help here.
I dont think so it may take a while to learn a person and this is just based on my experience...
Hi, Susan! Love your videos all the time. How do you explain a situation who has emotional connection with you and shows interest and values your ideas, but still he chose to be with another woman. We both could feel the connection, but none of us were willing to make the move. It's making me sad because I dont get that kind of connection with anyone (atleast I have not met him yet). Hope you will get to read this! ❤️
Hi Heather. Maybe he admires you, but chooses 'less' because it's safe.
Thank you for replying! ❤️
Thank you beautiful Susan 🌹Men are always asking how old am I. I don’t even know them on FB. I find it rude and how can I tell them it’s none of there business?
Can you schedule a coaching session with you when I live in Vietnam?
Yes, within an fraction of a second...
haha it's true, my dear.. .at least for me..
label making MACHINES. lmao. thank you
Everything you have said is correct, I did decided the moment I kissed your, she was right for me. Asked your on my first date to be my girlfriend,I felt hooked. I just knew she was right for me.
Yes.......
Answer is yes he just didn't know if he wanted to try anyway
No they don't !
Men fancy, become unhinged
and pursue !!
If they walked away for a month or two, they would make a DIFFERENT decision. Believe me !
That's why guys go cold. They reassessed with time & regretted
a decision made too quickly.
That's honest guy perspective ??
Heat of the chase vs
reasoned choice ??
Yes we do. But I you give us any red flag, we will be disappointed
Sometimez they are hot n cold because you ARE girlfriend material
BobbiDelight Please explain how that is so? I have a hot and cold guy whom I’ve been seeing for close to 4 months now. It’s getting pretty tiring for me.
BobbiDelight yeah..they scared that THEY are not good enough xx
Indeed. I can relate even as a Man to that.
The day that I met my wife, I knew that I would marry her.
Yes
Sometimes :)
Short answer. Yes. Give me 10 min
Dear Suzan I personally believe that appearance of a woman is 70% and the other 30% is how logical and down to earth they are ( not talking nonsense or being totally stupid boring and lazy )
I'd switch those numbers around, then make it 60% (grounded) 40% (care of appearance).
My opinion: No. Many failed relationships speak of this. Although it IS possible and some guys can do it.
We know by the first date if she is by material
Easily. Not a man but a lesbian. Everyone looks for something different tho! Someone may not think your gf material but I think you’re wifey material! It all depends. He didn’t even explain what his idea of gf material was! My idea of gf material is working towards a passion, mature, fit, assertive, funny, clean, intelligent etc. etc etc.
I recently had a guy interested in me who is eight years younger than me. How I found out he liked me though with his sister. Mind you I barely knew her and she is a beautiful person but she’s loud. And she came in all exciting saying my brother likes you my brother likes you. For me that kind of turned me off because it I was scared I have asked myself the question am I ready yet? Anyway I ended up connecting with this guy for a little bit. I feel he could be potential husband material because he’s good with kids and he and that’s what he wants to as he wants to settle down and he wants away so it’s just difficult because we both decided to not date right now because I’m finishing up with a big project and he’s doing his thing. We both just broke upWas someone as well. He was in a two year relationship I want to say maybe a little more but I just came out of a seven-year relationship. I guess what I’m trying to say is I wish I didn’t know why because I feel he’s a really good guy and I feel like I just gave him the wrong signals not knowing it at the time. Because I’ve never been treated well by a man but he definitely made things click into place for me.
So what happened? Curious.
Three months later he called me winning and crying. He basically wanted me as a side peace. I said absolutely Not! And hung up the phone.
@@tarah8919 Oooh - sorry it ended that way. Good that you stood up for yourself!
M M thanks
Hot and cold made me crazy. I just left.
Im a bit old school. If she passes the door test. She is in.
Could men think you are playing games or something when they see you being different with different groups of people
My biggest problem with women these days after a couple dates...
They're always staring at their phone !!!
Next, they get sloppy drunk and lose all their Mojo.
And finally, I discover they're on a depressants and all the dating advice in the world is thrown out the window.
K Kenason that's not fair the comment about ADs..I have crippling anxiety and body dysmorphia..my pills have been literal life savers..some ppl.need to be on meds but arent
To be frank ... no. ... Even just looking at the stats we know that most BF-GFs break up at some point. About 70 to 80 percent of cohabitators break up. About 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. Good communication skills aren't going to help much because it's not what people say that's important -- it's what they do (or eventually do). The whole thing is a gamble. You'd have better luck picking horses. Horse-players always remember the one that came in -- but conveniently forget the ones that lost. I think that's what's happening here when guys "claim" they actually know.
If you meet someone and go on a first date...if you find you are both really attracted to each other sexually and decide to go to bed ....this shouldn't be a problem????
If you meet someone go on a first date and want to "get to know " each other go slower..this shouldn't be a problem!!???
It takes about 5 dates. It is an interview.
Yup, I know instantly whether a girl is girlfriend-material or not. I don't even have to go on a few dates to figure it out. She communicates that herself all the time through her body language, demeanour, the way she carries herself, the way she interacts with the world around her, etc. As for myself, will I ever find 'the one'? Hmmm.... :D
Its me who decides if I am a girlfriend material ;) ..if a man doesnt see it its on him. Swipe right on self first ;)
yes!
grassblade63 then it would simply mean I wasn't girlfriend material for You. You wouldn't be a boyfriend material for me clearly. Simply not a match. But i would still be girlfriend material for anothet man. And its not about being empowered feminist. Its about being a woman who knows her value
very true. if we perceive ourselves as girlfriend material and not succumb to mere hook up demands we become girlfriend material. and any girl can be either. if they feel like a one off hook up with a really hot guy (safely), its ok as well. and when the time comes to become serious and look for only long term commitment we become girl friend material because we wont accept anything less. so it does eventually depend on what we offer to the guys actually. they don't choose, we offer.
s e thats what I was trying to convey. You expressed it very well :)
grassblade63 likewise. Feel free to pay for the coffee :)
Answer to your questions, relatuionship or having family with a woman does not exist anymore. Maybe it existed 20 or 30 years ago. Now only f buddy...if women gets pregnant it’s an accident for both.
Hoe-ware 😂😂
If anyone is that smart send them to me we can team up and pick the winning lottery tickets. No one knows who is what or who is not until they enter a relationship and learn about each other there are women you know are trouble with a capital T and should be avoided at all cost. The rest should be treated with caution until proven trustworthy.A free piece of advice for you non believers the # 1 cause of divorce is marrige and the step from girlfriend is usually wife young men be careful whom you pick if your girlfriend shopping.