Dumper's Remorse - I Regret Being Stubborn

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  • Опубліковано 30 сер 2022
  • Dumpers remorse. In this video, we take a look at the dumper's perspective and discuss how stubbornness can play into a breakup. Sometimes breakups happen impulsively and we realize later that it wasn't the decision we really wanted.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 60

  • @Dad_Brad
    @Dad_Brad Рік тому +80

    After the break up she did some work on herself while he did not. It’s a shorter walk to secure from anxious, avoidants struggle much more to become secure. She learned about attachment theory and recognized he was an avoidant. She got smart and moved on.

  • @steelerman003
    @steelerman003 10 місяців тому +16

    Craig’s videos will help you to go from absolute broken viewer to self assertive human being.
    Thank you Craig for your work. It’s insanely helpful

  • @chilloften
    @chilloften Рік тому +29

    It’s mind blowing how he loves her but cannot act on it and claim in any way. Sheesh, a girl wants to feel special to you.
    She already gave you two precious years.

    • @HurricaneQueen777
      @HurricaneQueen777 5 місяців тому

      Yessss…and I just wasted 13 years on someone myself being married to an avoidant.

  • @geebro9737
    @geebro9737 Рік тому +14

    He was giving her mixed signals and she was guarding her heart.. when she pulled away he realized he wanted her.. that’s not real healthy love, that’s selfishness

  • @SallyM-hi1mh
    @SallyM-hi1mh Рік тому +106

    If he’s avoidant he’d have found any way out and blamed her for it. Gets his space and then regrets it. Same old story.

    • @laconsuela69
      @laconsuela69 Рік тому +22

      Yeah. My ex gave me the weirdest excuses, gaslit me into believing it was my fault, and although hasn't regretted it yet...but once I found out about the fearful avoidant attachment style everything made sense. She was a textbook case

    • @dr_candiru7817
      @dr_candiru7817 Рік тому +6

      My fearful avoidant ex shows up to a friday morning mass that she knows I attend and sits next to me. She’s moved and lives 15 miles away. If she beats me there she sits where I normally sit. After she takes her dog to the park walking distance from my house. She drives by 15 churches and 20 parks. I don’t know what to think

    • @KevenDuring360
      @KevenDuring360 Рік тому +10

      Exactly that’s their problem then they wonder why they don’t fit to be in a relationship

    • @lettie1569
      @lettie1569 Рік тому +8

      You described exactly what my ex did. 3 TIMES!!
      Shuts down > dump me > come back regretting months later.
      Last time now took him 5 months to reach out. His mom told me that he was thinking about reaching out, and she basically told him to leave me alone because he hurt me too much already, and if he was going to reach out he had to put everything on line and be ready to be committed.

    • @SallyM-hi1mh
      @SallyM-hi1mh Рік тому +6

      @@laconsuela69 yeah, my ex is also a FA. They really want to love and connect but just can’t do it. They’re too scared.

  • @imaneelabid1009
    @imaneelabid1009 9 місяців тому +9

    For the last month I had to live with a broken heart.. I thought I'd never get over this shocking break up! I asked at night.. that I just want to eat and sleep..tomorrow morning I saw this recommendation of Craig's videos! It took me 3 days..and I turn completely another person! I understand a lot of things! Thank u Craig ♥️ love from Morocco!

  • @julialednicky7542
    @julialednicky7542 Рік тому +1

    Really insightful to hear it from the dumpers point of view. Thank you!

  • @dusenstrahlverfahren
    @dusenstrahlverfahren 5 місяців тому +2

    Well, we are human beings. When we are hurt we become emotional. I begged and cried for the woman I thought she was the love of my life. I am not a kid I am a mature man, but still I felt those emotions. After two months I feel better. I still think about her and I know she thinks about me, but she wont reach out. Neither do I.

  • @MovieReviewJustin
    @MovieReviewJustin Рік тому +12

    Another home run from Craig, the relationship goat.

  • @darthvadersmom1192
    @darthvadersmom1192 Рік тому +9

    wow what a sick person he is... no man ever called me clingy but when i felt their actions show me that i withdraw asap. what a player he is run from these people imagine you marry someone like that and they tell the kids don't be clingy. being clingy is cute to me

  • @timchaffin5471
    @timchaffin5471 Рік тому +16

    Yup, I knew even before the video even started that it was a guy who backed away and was remorseful for breaking it off. Women never come back and it's happen twice for me.

    • @SM-tl9ls
      @SM-tl9ls Рік тому +1

      I am a woman and I went back 2 years after being dumped.

    • @carthy29
      @carthy29 Рік тому

      3 times for me and i did the no contact stuff perfectly for the last 2, still nada, but it made it easier for sure

    • @raoarw1859
      @raoarw1859 6 місяців тому +1

      Because they dont feel safe

  • @psalms1163
    @psalms1163 Рік тому +1

    Great video bro

  • @psalms1163
    @psalms1163 Рік тому +1

    Excellent video...

  • @roseclimbpaintcont
    @roseclimbpaintcont 10 місяців тому

    It haa been three years of working on myself every day. I have barely changed and that is with 1000 percent effort.

  • @CochoAntonio
    @CochoAntonio Рік тому +31

    Ladies: men always always come back, its up to you what to do what the day comes.

    • @LaoSoftware
      @LaoSoftware Рік тому +11

      You do nothing. There's other fishes in the sea. Move on.

    • @standground7956
      @standground7956 Рік тому +6

      *Sometimes you did something wrong and you can’t demand closure.* Once I got definitive proof that I was cheated on, I only wondered or doubted for about an hour. Then I realized that confrontation would be meaningless. Meaningless in the sense that it wouldn’t change the fact that they were misleading me and I didn’t want them to feel bad about getting busted. It was refreshing to walk away with no closure. Plus, why would a cheater want closure from someone they were cheating on. By ghosting a cheater you’re being generous and doing them a huge favor. I’ve done this twice with long term relationships. I don’t know if both women ever found out that I discovered them cheating but it evens out since they kept me in the dark. I’m not coming back, they can drift in the land of uncertainty indefinitely.

    • @Bloodsport1337
      @Bloodsport1337 2 місяці тому +1

      Men: ladies always come back, it’s up to you what to do when the day comes

  • @M4coY
    @M4coY Рік тому +11

    good topic. i hope your next topic is about the ex who broke up because of his friend's instigation. thanks

    • @LG-ly7pw
      @LG-ly7pw Рік тому +1

      Easily lead much if that’s the case?!

  • @lesleysole6427
    @lesleysole6427 Рік тому +6

    Mine cheated ..hope he does regreat ..I never take him back..taking the verbal abuse n then started get physical n his drinking ..
    I was one working while he just sat back n drank ..
    I have n still working on myself need to keep doing it now I'm.recivering from being ill. The work books ..
    I still have what I've learnt in planted ..
    Thank you for them n want to keep doing n working on myself ..
    Do you have anything about agrophobia fear of outside open spaces too?
    These helped me n be strong n realise what my worth. To be respected valued loved honesty..I do deserve them.things n give back of course

  • @HurricaneQueen777
    @HurricaneQueen777 5 місяців тому +1

    Being called clingy is absolutely horrific, embarrassing, and traumatic for sure; the ones who throw around the word clingy tend to be massive hypocrites.

  • @maanecerezo7723
    @maanecerezo7723 Рік тому +8

    my 6 yrs BF dumped me. hurt me so bad....

  • @kevinp3941
    @kevinp3941 3 місяці тому

    Any advice on working with an x

  • @roseclimbpaintcont
    @roseclimbpaintcont 10 місяців тому +2

    I regret thinking I could find better than my ex I was with for 7 years. We broke up in Feb 2018.
    I don't want him back, though.
    I doubt I will ever have another partner again.

  • @zackedward9956
    @zackedward9956 4 дні тому

    I didnot let my gf meet my parents for 4 years, and she dumped me , I had met all of her family member but my parents live in different country so she did not met them not even talked to them on the video call I want to let her meet now but she acts so cold

  • @djpdyson
    @djpdyson Рік тому +4

    I have a few items he probably forgot about. I'm finding it triggering to have this stuff here. Do I just ship them to him? I've been no contact 6 weeks and blocked for 4 when he reached out to me and I told him my boundaries. Apparently he didn't like my boundaries because he ghosted me then blocked everywhere . I really don't want to call him and I doubt I'm not blocked on the phone anyway. Should I throw his stuff out? I'm high anxiety and still really grieving. Everything is triggering and I just want every reminder gone.

    • @conquistadorchevalier6687
      @conquistadorchevalier6687 Рік тому +6

      In this instance I would personally ship his stuff back to him & stick to no contact as your anxiety is high.
      You won't need to have any contact with him this way

    • @TJRahn
      @TJRahn Рік тому +6

      Throw that shit away. He would have grabbed it if he wanted it. Obviously he can live without and you don't want to live with it. It will be freeing, trust me.

    • @joannab1692
      @joannab1692 7 місяців тому

      ​@@TJRahn😂

  • @Wildanimal864.
    @Wildanimal864. 2 місяці тому

    Avoidants are selfish people.

  • @sandral2261
    @sandral2261 Місяць тому

    He sounds emotionally immature

  • @moneytime1556
    @moneytime1556 Рік тому +1

    First

  • @tbelj
    @tbelj 11 місяців тому

    I wish this video was an hour long. Theres so kenny similarities in my breakup. I’m fearful avoidant and I struggled with closeness and vulnerability at times. Started therapy a month after, she didn’t want to take me back because change doesn’t happen overnight. She wanted to stay friends I said no. Its been 3 weeks NC 🥲

  • @Scorcher-ii1ty
    @Scorcher-ii1ty Рік тому +3

    Omg this sounds exactly like my gf. We just broke up. Going out for 2 years never met anyone in her family. Wouldn’t allow me to go to her house. Very superficial all we did is have sex. She left without telling me why she left. In medical field. She had a key to my house and my life was an open book.

    • @chilloften
      @chilloften Рік тому +2

      What vulnerability did you show, none!

    • @lyricmuzik5695
      @lyricmuzik5695 8 місяців тому +1

      @@chilloften How about him giving her a key to his house? His life being an open book? Did you miss those points?

    • @lyricmuzik5695
      @lyricmuzik5695 8 місяців тому

      Sounds like she was just passing the time to be honest bro. Major red flag, 2 years and you never met her family? When a woman is serious about you they can't wait for you to meet the family (that is if they have a good relationship with their family)