The funny thing is that he never met my standards. I lowered my standards looking at the potential and trying to help/fix while also believing the manipulation and not understanding that there are truly horrible people out there, not your typical murderers, robbers and crooks but even worse.
Same. I realized I had to lower myself and started doing things I had stopped (like drinking) to be in his boring company. Never again. I'm grateful I learned the difference between love and being trauma bonded.
When I told my Ex-Wife No to getting back together.. and I said " Have a nice Life " , she said "No No Wait, what you mean Have a Nice Life". I explained that I will not be around anymore, I think that destroyed a part of her, I felt terrible, but I had no choice.
This may not be a popular opinion in these circles but I feel you can have forgiveness and compassion for the narcissist that hurt you. Yes you need to seperate and heal. But you should not hold negative energy towards them. They are in a personal Hell and may never realize they are at fault for their demise. Let them go with love as Jesus taught us. If they can humble themselves before God may he have mercy.
@@rawkingkong I saw her face in person the other day, to drop off a package for my daughter, after some time of not seeing her. My heart dropped to see her physical condition, she is aging , beat from working and life as a I can tell, once she enjoyed a Christmas full of family around her, now they spend Christmas with strangers or alone. Its sad, I do feel terrible for her, and I cause her no pain, I always mind my business and talk as polite as I can with her because I am a MAN, and not a cruel one. I once loved that SOUL that stood infront of me, and some of that love bubbles back up once and while when I see her. But this is the path she chose. I don't know what she thinks of me, I'm sure she realizes that my life has changed for the better, My body is Stronger, Bigger, more beautiful of a Man then ever before, because I took care of myself first and for most, and my new found freedom has served me well. Must see that. And its a pitty, I got what she wanted! I had an illusion she was living the LIFE! but that was not what I saw. its a pitty, she was so loved and protected by me. Pride and Modern society are destroying her, there I will have to stand back , close my eyes and let her live her life as she choses it. Nothing I can do to HELP! not because I don't want to, because a part of me wants to rescue her, but I can't let her back into my life and my family and friends, she is not wanted or respected anymore. Narcs never change. So yes, I have alot of compassion. But it makes no difference to her. I wish her the best, and hope that she can find Jesus in her heart, and make her life better. Thank you for the replie, I think I needed to put this all into words somewhere, so why not here where others can see and possibly feel them. Happy New Year, may God bless you all for 2024 and much more.!!
Went permanent no contact and never gave him a reason why. Never told him I never wanted to see him/speak to him ever again. I showed with my actions. He even tried reaching out a year and a half later and I still never broke no contact. I walked away and gave him the permanent silent treatment when he was playing me with that crap.
I discarded the narcissist and literally spent a year and half fully breaking free he wouldn’t leave me alone! He ran to his supply he cheated on me with and I never chased him and just let it go and that wasn’t apart of his plans they’re toddlers trying to act like they’re capable of being in relationships they need deliverance!
When I heard you say, “when you grew up in a narcissistic family, you were used to to being gaslighted all the time”. You are so right. I was used to not trusting my decisions and thoughts. So I leave home unprepared and how to deal with with people like this! I was book smart but not life smart!! I always doubted myself when it came to making decisions. But wow, did I eventually learn. I married a horrible narcissist who did a number on me. It was mind boggling at first. He was so nice at first. But as soon as I stood up for myself and questioned things, it became bad. He started devaluing me and saying some really nasty things. I could never do anything right! But I was determined to get out of this mess!! My divorce took over 3 years because he kept coming to court without bringing proper paperwork. Funny thing is, he initiated the divorce proceedings this time and he kept stalling. I think he thought I would take him back. I finally got through the divorce and moved to another state. We had a son who is now 29 years old. He tried to use him to get to me but it doesn’t work. My ex is 64 years old, he brags about sleeping with multiple people, lies , health issues and still the same way! So glad I moved on. It’s scary when I look back and wondered how I didn’t see this in the first place. Trauma bonds are not joke. It took a lot to overcome it, but I did. Thanks to God and a lot of tears.
I came to realise everything you're saying in this video and the knowledge is very liberating. I've experienced the narcissist and their flying monkeys normalising the abusive behaviours because they're weak mentally and are toxic as well. They claim at times to be neutral but always go along with the abuse by partaking and laughing about it. Seeking the approval of the narc. They always need to be forgiven only to do the same and worse again. I've learned to detach from them. Rumination has allowed me to realise there wasn't much of a relationship. People who knew us from childhood confirmed it to me. It was built on deceit, disrespect and hidden hatred. Our values could never align because there was no love in them. Only love for material things. I did the work and now my vibration is high. All their projections are a waste of time. My self worth is strong and I don't need any validation. The minute I see or hear something off I recognise it and shut it down. They've learned a hard lesson that I will leave you behind if you abuse me in any form. I've learned that a bunch of sick people banning together doesn't make them right. Sadly, unbiased individuals from the outside looking in see them as horrible people but they're too self absorbed to recognise it. So much childish manipulative nonsense. They lost someone valuable. I'm at peace with my decision to let toxic individuals go. 🙏
I really relate to the not drinking. She drank regularly like clockwork and unleashed hell on me. I'm 8 years sober and I thought I could hang. God it hurt so much. Being devalued while she was drunk. My not drinking was me constantly judging her. She also only hoovered me while she was drinking. Every time. I'm not going back this time. It's been 4 months. Hoping to stay strong. Thank you for this!
I’m finding your videos at the end of my healing journey. When I first started watching videos on narcissism it was trying to figure out what was going on. A confusion of chaos. Now at the end of my healing journey I feel like I got my doctorate in narcissism, and watching videos feels like being a psychologist and keeping up with peer review studies. It’s a huge difference. When I first started I was so traumatized and watching videos was more triggering. Now it’s way more analytical. I’m not watching out of my hurt. I’m watching out of my growth and letting it add to new layers of revelation. The end of this video really spoke to me. Because I was a child of narcissistic parents and yes they groomed me to think how I would be treated was normal. Being devalued is normal. Needing to prove myself, etc… I’ve had a series of narcissistic relationships until I got one super overt one that made me finally have a piece to look up and figure out what is happening. Your video is so right. I didn’t think about it. But my parents are probably shocked how I’m not missing them and wanting to talk to them every day. They think they are giving me the silent treatment, but that doesn’t work on someone who has no interest to speak to you in the first place. ✌🏾
So many people talking about my history, all the same process...incredible how we are so much the same "Being". It's great to know we're not alone🙏 Hope I could find some of you to talk about this insolite experience that makes you feel like the old skin doesn't suite anymore and the new person is still in gestastion phase. Congratulations to all of you for this crosssing. Just like all of you, I'm in the No Return Certain 🥂 An excelent new life for 2024 for all of you, guys🎉❤ Dont give in of you
@@Sonoio20245 I believe that this is a spiritual battle. That energetically survivors have a higher vibration. They aren’t as sheep like the rest. They dare to be different and it’s that spark that the enemy sets out to destroy because it ruins his system. I believe that’s why there is no new tactics. It’s all just different versions of the same story done by different people. They are on a demonic frequency and using the same tried and true tactics on repeat. They’ve been influenced and tap into something low vibrational. But we have the power and free will to tap into something high vibrational. And there is nothing higher vibrational than Jesus and access to the Holy Spirit. The supreme source of power in the universe. So much control without being controlling. Powerful stuff. ✨
Not only do they believe we’ve changed, they gaslight us, into believing we’ve changed as well. Thank goodness for podcasts like this that help us to clearly understand what we have been subjected to…
Omg I just broke up with my narc yesterday and I need to listen to this everyday because everything you said about do you want to go back to that is so true. Thats all it was constant cheating, constant lying, verbal abuse, it ended because he started an argument once again- raging, through a headset at my head and tried to slam me in the door and told me to pack all my stuff* and go! He came to my house later to apologize and I told him I'm done. This guy really took me through the ringer.
I never liked the narcissist. I figured it out in the love bomb. There was no sex. Still, he aggressively pursued and refused to accept “no”. These people are very sick and IMO operate out of a psychotic state and alternate reality.
It gets real ❤I dated 7-8 narcs from 14-45 the last narc I looked at her and said ,”I rather be alone than to Evaaaaaaa do that cycle or those codependent behaviors ever again. I will never let my little self down again. I deserve so much better, I realized I still had low self esteem and self worth. My ex was ugly I never would have dated her not my type but she seemed like a good person. “Seem” they are delusional 😂 ! My standards are not low and I’m never settling because I can be alone! I couldn’t be alone in my codependency now I’m healing!! ❤ Yes they do believe time heals that’s why they Hoover.
14:08 That little bit of dialogue where you're arguing with yourself in your head but ultimately know you could never go back was kinda funny only because it's so incredibly relatable
For sure, I've had that argument but still ended up going back... no more tho, finally left for good a year ago... even been avoiding Vegas so I don't run into her lol.
I almost did 24 yrs...even stayed arounf he went to jail 8 yrs. Ive been through so much. I almost broke. Depressed. I left a 100 times. Its been a jail bid. Your videos are so on point.❤
It's going to hurt him a lot when I am living like an empress and he is still living his miserable life. His emotional abuse caused physical illness. I've been disabled for 13 years because of it. I left him 7 1/2 months ago and have come a long way already. I was wanting to leave before I got sick, but got sick and couldn't. I'll never miss him. As soon as I realized that sick covert narcissist never loved me, I was done. I was already planning to leave, but would have come back if he changed, but now I realize they do not change. They don't want to. On the positive side.... almost dying 3 times and being stuck there for 26 years, I'll never let this happen again. I'll never let anyone make me feel bad enough about myself to get sick again. Done, done and DONE! And I know this gave him fuel, but I left him 78 pages of why I left. Pointed out times that I knew he was being deceptive. That I know he turned my girls against me. And I questioned about his involvement in about 40 of my chickens dying over the years and my cats dying/disappearing. And I wrote all of that because it was very therapeutic and so he would know that I was done. He is delusional if he thinks I'd ever go back to him. I wanted him to know I was done, done and done, so he didn't try to hoover me. It's hard to do when he doesn't know where I am though. :)
My ex bff narcissist hoovered me after 5 whole years! She sent holiday hoovers over Halloween and Xmas last year to try to get me feeling nostalgic or whatever. I left those messages on read because I don't put up with nonsense anymore. She also had a drinking and pill popping problem which just added to her demonic attitude. I also don't deal with people doing drugs or alcohol around me because they just exacerbate antagonism and narcissism.
Forgiveness is for you, not them. I'm order to truly heal and move on. One has to let go of the past, paving way for a brighter future. It gets better guys, hang in there🔥🦁✊❤️
WELL SAID.38 DAYS OUT OF HER 8TH&FINAL DISCARD.I LOVED HER SOOO MUCH BUT SHE WAS THE MOST TOXIC WOMAN I'VE EVER MET.STILL FIGHTING THROUGH THE TRAUMANOND.VERY DIFFICULT😢
@@ericking4072Congratulations! Remember you loved who she was pretending to be not who she actually was. Radical acceptance of this fact will help break the trauma bond.
Lucky you It was the exact opposite in my case... I took on 3 narcissistics Now I've a whole army of flying monkeys Fun fact They know I'm telling the truth But there afraid to look in the mirror I'm also over 6 years sober 😊😊😊😊😊😊
I feel similar, I got sick of the drama and how I was feeling. They didn't know what happened to me, why I don't miss them. I don't miss having all that confusion, and I just can't live like that.
Omg...your the 1..your the 1...I feel like I found my freedom through your words your amazing personality..thankyou plz continue making videos of these demons we need you. Tour saving lufes through the Holy Spirit. God guide you keep you safe. Your a chosen 1.
When my wife discarded, me and told me she was filling for divorce, I laughed and told her it was the best thing she ever did for me, apparently I was to beg and chase, but I don't do that.
What is happening with this video is that Donnielle is talking to me DIRECTLY! Not one sentence, not one word she speaks of is for anyone else. Everything has happened and is expected to happen in future. It hurt me to hear about self esteem part. I lost grip on it. I’m in a happy place after no contact of 8 months. I’m now relocating far away but it’s for a good future. I am too alert, too healed and too careful. I pray all of us are narcfree sooner than later.
THANK YOU ! Donielle honey I’m grateful for you , you all are saving my life with each video the work y’all doing should not go unnoticed ! Again thank u
When I heal dear God. I will hold a prayer of Thanksgiving meeting. Damn they screw your life with their words. Worst experience ever. Dear God hear my deep prayer. I'm happy for the ones who've gone ahead and won.
They will repeatedly idealize and devalue whether you're doing good, bad, been in contact, or been no contact, they are stuck with the introjects of all their past supplies, the relationships continue in their minds until they die.
Wow! Yes! My head has come out of the fog. I knew…..for some time…..but why I did not listen to the red flags I did not have a clue. I have moved on. I really hope that she find some new, Supply so she will leave me alone. 🤞
My narc wife I met and married 50 years ago for 8 years is the worst human I have ever had to deal with and I will soon be 70 years old, my present wife of 40 years is a total blessing.I blocked her on everything.
Wish this video was around back in the day 1981-1982. I had no knowledge about NPD, but thank you for sharing your video it's educational and informative. ❤
Thank you for your take on this your story sounds much like my own can't even count now how many times I've been discared now the final discard was mine i finally seen and excepted nothing was ever going to change again thank you for your honest take on this i did this for so long💯❤️🙏🙌
I believe my all traits of a narcisist knows he is indeed toxic and knows he lied, manipulated me, ripped my soul to pieces. When I first met him 5 years ago he extended his arm and hand out like hitlers salute. His hand on my shoulder and said he feels my pain and injury from people and said he is an empath. I I have been stupid until recently. I went no contact 8 days ago. I know I need long term therapy and seeking help. But The past 8 days has been wonderful being alone and not being abused. Out of nowhere I begin to cry but it's not because I miss him, it's because I'm happy I escaped from him. I can visualize my happiest moments in life. His evil sister called me today and said I can get my property and my cat and I replied and said NO. She later said that she is having my property dropped off today. I told her to bring my cat to the animal shelter and I will claim her and to throw a houseful of my property away. I was polite, thanked her for offering me my property. She hasn't replied. I shouldn't have responded to her in the first place.
Absolutely this topic is interesting...no one talks about this fact, and it is true...the more healing I do, the stronger I get he somehow senses this fact and hovers again.
This comment is after watching the entire video wow thank you of all the videos I've watched from several other channels you by far make it all more relatable through your own journey you can hear in your voice how genuine and honest your message is coming across by learned experience thank you so much keep it up I'll definitely be listening 💯❤️🙏🙌
todo lo que estás diciendo. es como que fueras yo. ahora estoy casi el último proceso. cero cero cero. es increíble. Solo le pido a Dios. 😇 por todos. ❤
No contact for 20 days with my narc. Have not been intimate with him for 5 weeks. It feels easier now, Im focusing on doing things I love. But still feels that I need to cut some people out and also move from here. And Im not dating a narc again ever in my life. What about toxic family members? Will they also fade away with time on this yourney?
I have too say your on fire with this💪💪, I like how you roll with the truth, best I ever heard on UA-cam 💪💪, thank you I look forward to listening too your other posts, thank you ❤️❤️
Thnx Amen he went to Vegas w/o me! I knew he had someone else! Liar! Time to heal discard him!He compared his ex’s against me! Yikes I totally agree with you I went through all of that you described! No more abuse!!!No more whores! No more mind games!!11 days no Narc! Thnx🙏
My ex doesn't care but it's a good thing ig. My therapy once said she does care, but she not going to show it. Even though I hate that she doesn't care about me and she living her best and happy life without me. I know it's a bad thing to want her to chase me like I chase her but I won't go back I just want her to feel the same I did. Just wishful thinking. I need to let it go but it is so hard too when you're going through emotions.
💫Ex narc can do all the most evil and vile and horrible things to me and discard me in the most hurtful way over and over and I kept going back to the bull💩 like a fool so I held myself accountable. But I'm much stronger and much wiser now. And 2 years no contact. 😁And when we know better we do better and self reflect and growth. And with healing and prayer, and my strong set boundaries I will never go back to that demon nor toxic chaotic hell. My peace and happiness feels wonderful and staying a single woman feels even better. But the AUDACITY for me is how the narc PRETENDS to have selective amnesia and he never did anything wrong to me and loves trying to play the victim and failed the recent hoover attempts. I leave that pathetic lunatic lying loser 🤡demon narc to live in his own life of torment and pure hell. KARMA will deal. Nola9Ward ⚜️💃🏽
I don’t normally leave comments but I just wanted to say of all the content creators in this space your videos are the ones I listen to over and over again for a couple of reasons. 1) you have a very lovely speaking voice, as well as a fantastic singing voice. I watched some of your singing videos. 2) what you have to say is so heartfelt. You give a genuine feeling as a listener that you are speaking directly to me. Thank you for what you do.
Hello Friend. I am in the process of budgeting for this and next month. It's bad monetarily but I can afford your book and am going to buy it this evening MEZ!! So happy I found closure finally and thank you for your work. Do you know what's funny? My narc relative, despite telling me to "go to therapy" and attacking me repeatedly for allegedly not doing so when I could've (which was a lie) , now seems hugely dissatisfied with me actually going to therapy. She must have thought the therapist would be telling me how bad, wrong and sick I was but instead I learned how to set boundaries and not let her mistreat me like she's used to and she is seething. Man, it's really something! I hope you are doing well and find one or two additional streams on income to sustain yourself. All the best, R.E.
WOW! This really resonated with me! I’ve just subscribed because you have such a relatable take on what it’s like to deal with people like this. I hope you keep on keeping it real!
I was stuck on believing Im no going to chaning anyone because Im being controllng when I say the things you have mentioned I would be blaming and not taking responsibility for my own actions thats what I believed back then. To day I see more of what you are saying to be true , not Stuck just focusing on my own things that wil help me and my family rekindle our relationship because they were hurt by this too I adult estranged daughter cant stade the man and my ooter two adult children are very grateful that Im getting it ❤️ 🙏 Amen
The thing is, when you said about drinking. I consider myself to be kind caring, loving, affectionate, a community person always will to lend a hand where necessary. But I drink sometimes in the summer and sometimes in the winter. Discarding someone because they drink wouldn't necessarily be the only option. If you and I got on together really well to be in a relationship, and you mentioned that really you were looking for someone that doesn't drink I would say, OK, when would be the times I would be allowed to have a drink? At Christmas or a work party. Other than that, I would choose never to drink. Would that be a deal breaker for you? Or would you see it as a compromise?
Compromise , I told my ex that I didn't want to drink heavily with him as I'm a mom and I'm an occasional drinker, he left and ghosted me haven't seen or heard from him since 3 weeks now, totally blanked ,after 13 months 😢, not a word I'm very unnerved and disgusted I was dumped because of alcohol it's such an insult , healing to you please god we will do better and heal , God bless you
Boom had/have narcissist dad, realizing my mom is a narcissist and a brother that's one. Plus had a narc in my life for three years...why can we not get them out of our head?
It is all very simple...To absolutely des-troy a Narc with EASE, All anyone has to do is lookup - 'Gaddis The Ayahuasca Wave', and have them read that whole page over and over again.. There is nothing they can say or do after that., And their BS is out of your beautiful life forever !.. ;)
![ЛЕБЕДЕВ у ДУДЯ: муху не обманешь 😁 [Пародия]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/E74h5fvVrqs/mqdefault.jpg)
How crazy!!!!!!! What you're attracted to when you're broken, disgusts you when you've healed.🤢🤮😷
God bless you
Being alone is AMAZING
❤
The funny thing is that he never met my standards. I lowered my standards looking at the potential and trying to help/fix while also believing the manipulation and not understanding that there are truly horrible people out there, not your typical murderers, robbers and crooks but even worse.
Same. I realized I had to lower myself and started doing things I had stopped (like drinking) to be in his boring company. Never again. I'm grateful I learned the difference between love and being trauma bonded.
When I told my Ex-Wife No to getting back together.. and I said " Have a nice Life " , she said "No No Wait, what you mean Have a Nice Life". I explained that I will not be around anymore, I think that destroyed a part of her, I felt terrible, but I had no choice.
This may not be a popular opinion in these circles but I feel you can have forgiveness and compassion for the narcissist that hurt you. Yes you need to seperate and heal. But you should not hold negative energy towards them. They are in a personal Hell and may never realize they are at fault for their demise. Let them go with love as Jesus taught us. If they can humble themselves before God may he have mercy.
@@rawkingkong I saw her face in person the other day, to drop off a package for my daughter, after some time of not seeing her. My heart dropped to see her physical condition, she is aging , beat from working and life as a I can tell, once she enjoyed a Christmas full of family around her, now they spend Christmas with strangers or alone. Its sad, I do feel terrible for her, and I cause her no pain, I always mind my business and talk as polite as I can with her because I am a MAN, and not a cruel one. I once loved that SOUL that stood infront of me, and some of that love bubbles back up once and while when I see her. But this is the path she chose. I don't know what she thinks of me, I'm sure she realizes that my life has changed for the better, My body is Stronger, Bigger, more beautiful of a Man then ever before, because I took care of myself first and for most, and my new found freedom has served me well. Must see that. And its a pitty, I got what she wanted! I had an illusion she was living the LIFE! but that was not what I saw. its a pitty, she was so loved and protected by me. Pride and Modern society are destroying her, there I will have to stand back , close my eyes and let her live her life as she choses it. Nothing I can do to HELP! not because I don't want to, because a part of me wants to rescue her, but I can't let her back into my life and my family and friends, she is not wanted or respected anymore. Narcs never change. So yes, I have alot of compassion. But it makes no difference to her. I wish her the best, and hope that she can find Jesus in her heart, and make her life better. Thank you for the replie, I think I needed to put this all into words somewhere, so why not here where others can see and possibly feel them. Happy New Year, may God bless you all for 2024 and much more.!!
You did what you had to in order to protect yourself. Be well.
God bless you
Went permanent no contact and never gave him a reason why. Never told him I never wanted to see him/speak to him ever again. I showed with my actions. He even tried reaching out a year and a half later and I still never broke no contact. I walked away and gave him the permanent silent treatment when he was playing me with that crap.
YOU HAVE STATED MY EXACT EXPERIENCE,ALSO. GOOD FOR YOU!
I'm doing the same thing. It's freeing 😊
I discarded the narcissist and literally spent a year and half fully breaking free he wouldn’t leave me alone! He ran to his supply he cheated on me with and I never chased him and just let it go and that wasn’t apart of his plans they’re toddlers trying to act like they’re capable of being in relationships they need deliverance!
Yes, exactly what I did. We are so much better off. Continue to heal, grow and I wish you kingdom love!
@@Savedbygrace_awareofthenarc Ty same to you!
They all use the same playbook! It's absolutely disgusting!
They are disgusting!🤢
Keep speaking the truth!❤
When I heard you say, “when you grew up in a narcissistic family, you were used to to being gaslighted all the time”. You are so right. I was used to not trusting my decisions and thoughts. So I leave home unprepared and how to deal with with people like this! I was book smart but not life smart!! I always doubted myself when it came to making decisions. But wow, did I eventually learn. I married a horrible narcissist who did a number on me. It was mind boggling at first. He was so nice at first. But as soon as I stood up for myself and questioned things, it became bad. He started devaluing me and saying some really nasty things. I could never do anything right! But I was determined to get out of this mess!! My divorce took over 3 years because he kept coming to court without bringing proper paperwork. Funny thing is, he initiated the divorce proceedings this time and he kept stalling. I think he thought I would take him back. I finally got through the divorce and moved to another state. We had a son who is now 29 years old. He tried to use him to get to me but it doesn’t work. My ex is 64 years old, he brags about sleeping with multiple people, lies , health issues and still the same way! So glad I moved on. It’s scary when I look back and wondered how I didn’t see this in the first place. Trauma bonds are not joke. It took a lot to overcome it, but I did. Thanks to God and a lot of tears.
Youre on point. It gets me when you say it: "You did too much".
Indeed she did.
All is forgiven, but she'll never hear me speak to her again
Right good 4 u
Same here bro
I came to realise everything you're saying in this video and the knowledge is very liberating. I've experienced the narcissist and their flying monkeys normalising the abusive behaviours because they're weak mentally and are toxic as well. They claim at times to be neutral but always go along with the abuse by partaking and laughing about it. Seeking the approval of the narc. They always need to be forgiven only to do the same and worse again. I've learned to detach from them. Rumination has allowed me to realise there wasn't much of a relationship. People who knew us from childhood confirmed it to me. It was built on deceit, disrespect and hidden hatred. Our values could never align because there was no love in them. Only love for material things. I did the work and now my vibration is high. All their projections are a waste of time. My self worth is strong and I don't need any validation. The minute I see or hear something off I recognise it and shut it down. They've learned a hard lesson that I will leave you behind if you abuse me in any form. I've learned that a bunch of sick people banning together doesn't make them right. Sadly, unbiased individuals from the outside looking in see them as horrible people but they're too self absorbed to recognise it. So much childish manipulative nonsense. They lost someone valuable. I'm at peace with my decision to let toxic individuals go. 🙏
Sister you must be a carpenter because you've hit all the nails squarely on the head!!!!!.
I really relate to the not drinking. She drank regularly like clockwork and unleashed hell on me. I'm 8 years sober and I thought I could hang. God it hurt so much. Being devalued while she was drunk. My not drinking was me constantly judging her. She also only hoovered me while she was drinking. Every time. I'm not going back this time. It's been 4 months. Hoping to stay strong. Thank you for this!
You can do this.❤
Wow, my ex used to say "you're MAKING me Feel like a degEneRate!!" Whenever i didn't keep up with his drinking
I am in the exact same boat, sir. I can SO relate. Stay strong. Stay on your path. I know I am!
I’m finding your videos at the end of my healing journey. When I first started watching videos on narcissism it was trying to figure out what was going on. A confusion of chaos. Now at the end of my healing journey I feel like I got my doctorate in narcissism, and watching videos feels like being a psychologist and keeping up with peer review studies. It’s a huge difference. When I first started I was so traumatized and watching videos was more triggering. Now it’s way more analytical. I’m not watching out of my hurt. I’m watching out of my growth and letting it add to new layers of revelation. The end of this video really spoke to me. Because I was a child of narcissistic parents and yes they groomed me to think how I would be treated was normal. Being devalued is normal. Needing to prove myself, etc… I’ve had a series of narcissistic relationships until I got one super overt one that made me finally have a piece to look up and figure out what is happening. Your video is so right. I didn’t think about it. But my parents are probably shocked how I’m not missing them and wanting to talk to them every day. They think they are giving me the silent treatment, but that doesn’t work on someone who has no interest to speak to you in the first place. ✌🏾
So many people talking about my history, all the same process...incredible how we are so much the same "Being". It's great to know we're not alone🙏 Hope I could find some of you to talk about this insolite experience that makes you feel like the old skin doesn't suite anymore and the new person is still in gestastion phase. Congratulations to all of you for this crosssing. Just like all of you, I'm in the No Return Certain 🥂 An excelent new life for 2024 for all of you, guys🎉❤ Dont give in of you
@@Sonoio20245 I believe that this is a spiritual battle. That energetically survivors have a higher vibration. They aren’t as sheep like the rest. They dare to be different and it’s that spark that the enemy sets out to destroy because it ruins his system. I believe that’s why there is no new tactics. It’s all just different versions of the same story done by different people. They are on a demonic frequency and using the same tried and true tactics on repeat. They’ve been influenced and tap into something low vibrational. But we have the power and free will to tap into something high vibrational. And there is nothing higher vibrational than Jesus and access to the Holy Spirit. The supreme source of power in the universe. So much control without being controlling. Powerful stuff. ✨
Not only do they believe we’ve changed, they gaslight us, into believing we’ve changed as well. Thank goodness for podcasts like this that help us to clearly understand what we have been subjected to…
Omg I just broke up with my narc yesterday and I need to listen to this everyday because everything you said about do you want to go back to that is so true. Thats all it was constant cheating, constant lying, verbal abuse, it ended because he started an argument once again- raging, through a headset at my head and tried to slam me in the door and told me to pack all my stuff* and go! He came to my house later to apologize and I told him I'm done. This guy really took me through the ringer.
Me too love😮
😢😢😢
THROUGH THE RINGER.....WELL PUT.3.5 YEARS ABOUT 200,000$SHE WAS SOOOOO DECEITFUL😢
I am so happy you for you Sista❤️🩹🫂🪶🫂☮️
Very sorry you had to go thru this. Be careful, be safe. If a narc devolves into psychopathy it can be potentially dangerous for a narc’s “target”.
I never liked the narcissist. I figured it out in the love bomb. There was no sex. Still, he aggressively pursued and refused to accept “no”. These people are very sick and IMO operate out of a psychotic state and alternate reality.
They are demon possessed!
Yes
It gets real ❤I dated 7-8 narcs from 14-45 the last narc I looked at her and said ,”I rather be alone than to Evaaaaaaa do that cycle or those codependent behaviors ever again. I will never let my little self down again. I deserve so much better, I realized I still had low self esteem and self worth. My ex was ugly I never would have dated her not my type but she seemed like a good person. “Seem” they are delusional 😂 ! My standards are not low and I’m never settling because I can be alone! I couldn’t be alone in my codependency now I’m healing!! ❤
Yes they do believe time heals that’s why they Hoover.
14:08 That little bit of dialogue where you're arguing with yourself in your head but ultimately know you could never go back was kinda funny only because it's so incredibly relatable
For sure, I've had that argument but still ended up going back... no more tho, finally left for good a year ago... even been avoiding Vegas so I don't run into her lol.
100%, it's a complete lightbulb moment
You have a solid grasp on reality! A rarity these days! Every thing you describe is so true!
He planned a trip to Florida and he knew how badly I wanted to go with him. I didn't find out until he got back that he took someone else.
Oh they love doing things like that
So typical!!
My ex did the exact same thing to me!
That’s the stuff they do.
I almost did 24 yrs...even stayed arounf he went to jail 8 yrs. Ive been through so much. I almost broke. Depressed. I left a 100 times. Its been a jail bid. Your videos are so on point.❤
Right I didn’t know how culpable he was, it’s awful how they premeditate.
It's going to hurt him a lot when I am living like an empress and he is still living his miserable life.
His emotional abuse caused physical illness. I've been disabled for 13 years because of it.
I left him 7 1/2 months ago and have come a long way already. I was wanting to leave before I got sick, but got sick and couldn't.
I'll never miss him. As soon as I realized that sick covert narcissist never loved me, I was done.
I was already planning to leave, but would have come back if he changed, but now I realize they do not change. They don't want to.
On the positive side.... almost dying 3 times and being stuck there for 26 years, I'll never let this happen again. I'll never let anyone make me feel bad enough about myself to get sick again.
Done, done and DONE!
And I know this gave him fuel, but I left him 78 pages of why I left. Pointed out times that I knew he was being deceptive. That I know he turned my girls against me. And I questioned about his involvement in about 40 of my chickens dying over the years and my cats dying/disappearing.
And I wrote all of that because it was very therapeutic and so he would know that I was done. He is delusional if he thinks I'd ever go back to him. I wanted him to know I was done, done and done, so he didn't try to hoover me. It's hard to do when he doesn't know where I am though. :)
My ex bff narcissist hoovered me after 5 whole years! She sent holiday hoovers over Halloween and Xmas last year to try to get me feeling nostalgic or whatever. I left those messages on read because I don't put up with nonsense anymore. She also had a drinking and pill popping problem which just added to her demonic attitude. I also don't deal with people doing drugs or alcohol around me because they just exacerbate antagonism and narcissism.
Forgiveness is for you, not them.
I'm order to truly heal and move on.
One has to let go of the past, paving way for a brighter future.
It gets better guys, hang in there🔥🦁✊❤️
WELL SAID.38 DAYS OUT OF HER 8TH&FINAL DISCARD.I LOVED HER SOOO MUCH BUT SHE WAS THE MOST TOXIC WOMAN I'VE EVER MET.STILL FIGHTING THROUGH THE TRAUMANOND.VERY DIFFICULT😢
@@ericking4072Congratulations! Remember you loved who she was pretending to be not who she actually was. Radical acceptance of this fact will help break the trauma bond.
All those people he thought were his friends turned out to be my friends. They kept me informed about what he was saying about me.
Lucky you
It was the exact opposite in my case...
I took on 3 narcissistics
Now I've a whole army of flying monkeys
Fun fact
They know I'm telling the truth
But there afraid to look in the mirror
I'm also over 6 years sober 😊😊😊😊😊😊
I feel similar, I got sick of the drama and how I was feeling. They didn't know what happened to me, why I don't miss them. I don't miss having all that confusion, and I just can't live like that.
So true !!!!!!!! Listening at work on my healing journey this is 100 % accurate. Word for word awesome!! So glad for this channel first time here .
It took me almost 2 yrs of healing.it was horrible...but now I'm good;)
Sister you make sense!!!!!.
I love the way you described this evils 😈 I learned a lot from you! Thank you very much for sharing your knowledge!❤
Spot on. Very well conveyed. To hear you put my experience into words is strengthening and helps to solidifies my resolve. Thank you so much.
Looking back there have been many narcissists and maybe I also have been one for a time. Thank you for explaining so succinctly. Especially alcohol.
❤
This is so uplifting. Thank you 🙏🏻
Thanks for your help. I find your channel to be healing. God bless you. I am suffering from my Narc Wife
Omg...your the 1..your the 1...I feel like I found my freedom through your words your amazing personality..thankyou plz continue making videos of these demons we need you. Tour saving lufes through the Holy Spirit. God guide you keep you safe. Your a chosen 1.
When my wife discarded, me and told me she was filling for divorce, I laughed and told her it was the best thing she ever did for me, apparently I was to beg and chase, but I don't do that.
New standards,New knowledge, New Number who dis?
I had watched three of your videos and all had cheered me up!!!😃🎇🖐🏻💙 Much obligged! God bless you.
What is happening with this video is that Donnielle is talking to me DIRECTLY! Not one sentence, not one word she speaks of is for anyone else. Everything has happened and is expected to happen in future. It hurt me to hear about self esteem part. I lost grip on it. I’m in a happy place after no contact of 8 months. I’m now relocating far away but it’s for a good future. I am too alert, too healed and too careful. I pray all of us are narcfree sooner than later.
Hi!
I’ve listened to a LOT of videos since going No Contact and this is one of the best. You’ve explained a lot. Thank you!❤
THANK YOU ! Donielle honey I’m grateful for you , you all are saving my life with each video the work y’all doing should not go unnoticed ! Again thank u
Yes,Beautiful. You slayed it. Great job. I will check out some more of your videos. Felt like you are right beside me. Thanks.
When I heal dear God. I will hold a prayer of Thanksgiving meeting. Damn they screw your life with their words. Worst experience ever. Dear God hear my deep prayer. I'm happy for the ones who've gone ahead and won.
They will repeatedly idealize and devalue whether you're doing good, bad, been in contact, or been no contact, they are stuck with the introjects of all their past supplies, the relationships continue in their minds until they die.
Your Saving my life!!!❤❤❤ I'm crying from my souk. Iv prayed for you but I didn't know it would be you..your speaking NY words from my soul.
Wow! Yes! My head has come out of the fog. I knew…..for some time…..but why I did not listen to the red flags I did not have a clue. I have moved on. I really hope that she find some new, Supply so she will leave me alone. 🤞
Felt every word 🙌🏾🙏🏾💪🏾
Yep - my ex use to tell me they were Perfect and I was the Only one who thought they weren't. I called my ex on their B.S often - didn't like it 😂
I heard the exact same thing.
My narc wife I met and married 50 years ago for 8 years is the worst human I have ever had to deal with and I will soon be 70 years old, my present wife of 40 years is a total blessing.I blocked her on everything.
Wish this video was around back in the day 1981-1982. I had no knowledge about NPD, but thank you for sharing your video it's educational and informative. ❤
I told him tell HER I SAID GOOD LUCK!
You are Amazing & your description is unmatched. I want to thank you for making this video! Love is the Gift God gave those few!
Thank you for your take on this your story sounds much like my own can't even count now how many times I've been discared now the final discard was mine i finally seen and excepted nothing was ever going to change again thank you for your honest take on this i did this for so long💯❤️🙏🙌
I believe my all traits of a narcisist knows he is indeed toxic and knows he lied, manipulated me, ripped my soul to pieces. When I first met him 5 years ago he extended his arm and hand out like hitlers salute. His hand on my shoulder and said he feels my pain and injury from people and said he is an empath. I I have been stupid until recently. I went no contact 8 days ago. I know I need long term therapy and seeking help. But The past 8 days has been wonderful being alone and not being abused. Out of nowhere I begin to cry but it's not because I miss him, it's because I'm happy I escaped from him. I can visualize my happiest moments in life. His evil sister called me today and said I can get my property and my cat and I replied and said NO. She later said that she is having my property dropped off today. I told her to bring my cat to the animal shelter and I will claim her and to throw a houseful of my property away. I was polite, thanked her for offering me my property. She hasn't replied. I shouldn't have responded to her in the first place.
It's so fucking sick dam it's so fucking sick
Hell yes
Your always ON POINT 😊
Absolutely this topic is interesting...no one talks about this fact, and it is true...the more healing I do, the stronger I get he somehow senses this fact and hovers again.
This comment is after watching the entire video wow thank you of all the videos I've watched from several other channels you by far make it all more relatable through your own journey you can hear in your voice how genuine and honest your message is coming across by learned experience thank you so much keep it up I'll definitely be listening 💯❤️🙏🙌
todo lo que estás diciendo. es como que fueras yo.
ahora estoy casi el último proceso. cero cero cero.
es increíble.
Solo le pido a Dios. 😇
por todos. ❤
No contact for 20 days with my narc. Have not been intimate with him for 5 weeks. It feels easier now, Im focusing on doing things I love. But still feels that I need to cut some people out and also move from here. And Im not dating a narc again ever in my life. What about toxic family members? Will they also fade away with time on this yourney?
Leave them all along love yourself ❤️🩹
Great video! You gave me answers to some of my questions. Thank you!
1 day no contact. 2 1/2 mos apart. Im done.
I have too say your on fire with this💪💪, I like how you roll with the truth, best I ever heard on UA-cam 💪💪, thank you I look forward to listening too your other posts, thank you ❤️❤️
Thank you! 🙏🏽💖
So, what happens when the Narcissist finds out that you are a psychic?
Thnx Amen he went to Vegas w/o me! I knew he had someone else! Liar! Time to heal discard him!He compared his ex’s against me! Yikes I totally agree with you I went through all of that you described! No more abuse!!!No more whores! No more mind games!!11 days no Narc! Thnx🙏
My stomach felt yucky around my husband and his whole family grossssss
My ex doesn't care but it's a good thing ig. My therapy once said she does care, but she not going to show it. Even though I hate that she doesn't care about me and she living her best and happy life without me. I know it's a bad thing to want her to chase me like I chase her but I won't go back I just want her to feel the same I did. Just wishful thinking. I need to let it go but it is so hard too when you're going through emotions.
💫Ex narc can do all the most evil and vile and horrible things to me and discard me in the most hurtful way over and over and I kept going back to the bull💩 like a fool so I held myself accountable. But I'm much stronger and much wiser now. And 2 years no contact. 😁And when we know better we do better and self reflect and growth. And with healing and prayer, and my strong set boundaries I will never go back to that demon nor toxic chaotic hell. My peace and happiness feels wonderful and staying a single woman feels even better. But the AUDACITY for me is how the narc PRETENDS to have selective amnesia and he never did anything wrong to me and loves trying to play the victim and failed the recent hoover attempts. I leave that pathetic lunatic lying loser 🤡demon narc to live in his own life of torment and pure hell. KARMA will deal. Nola9Ward ⚜️💃🏽
I don’t normally leave comments but I just wanted to say of all the content creators in this space your videos are the ones I listen to over and over again for a couple of reasons.
1) you have a very lovely speaking voice, as well as a fantastic singing voice. I watched some of your singing videos.
2) what you have to say is so heartfelt. You give a genuine feeling as a listener that you are speaking directly to me. Thank you for what you do.
Girlllllll!!!!!!! You are so spot on
I can't!
You are speaking to my soul ❤
❤Thank you ❤
💯 truth!
I seen the light at the end of the tunnel. He knows it’s not going to happen ever. period. I can see clearly now that the rain is gone😊
Your insight is Great!! Your hitting the Narc, I was dealing with perfectly correct 💯!!!!!
So true. Great video!
Thank you!!! 💚🙏🏾
You're so on point.
Thanks for sharing
How you tell it is amazing.
Excellent video. Thank you!!
Your presentation was spot on!
The sister i Never had. Thank you so much ❤
They are a void of value 😂😂😂😂
Excellent! ❤
Hello Friend. I am in the process of budgeting for this and next month. It's bad monetarily but I can afford your book and am going to buy it this evening MEZ!! So happy I found closure finally and thank you for your work.
Do you know what's funny? My narc relative, despite telling me to "go to therapy" and attacking me repeatedly for allegedly not doing so when I could've (which was a lie) , now seems hugely dissatisfied with me actually going to therapy. She must have thought the therapist would be telling me how bad, wrong and sick I was but instead I learned how to set boundaries and not let her mistreat me like she's used to and she is seething. Man, it's really something! I hope you are doing well and find one or two additional streams on income to sustain yourself. All the best, R.E.
Well said explanational breakdown segment.
Thanks for the excerpt
thank you
WOW! This really resonated with me! I’ve just subscribed because you have such a relatable take on what it’s like to deal with people like this. I hope you keep on keeping it real!
I was stuck on believing Im no going to chaning anyone because Im being controllng when I say the things you have mentioned I would be blaming and not taking responsibility for my own actions thats what I believed back then. To day I see more of what you are saying to be true , not Stuck just focusing on my own things that wil help me and my family rekindle our relationship because they were hurt by this too I adult estranged daughter cant stade the man and my ooter two adult children are very grateful that Im getting it
❤️
🙏
Amen
I wont let a marc back
You are right
Their Crazy v
Ja jeg fandt en vej ud af tågen, det tog mig under 1 minut så jeg opdagede hurtigt at det var et spil jeg var I. Så ha en fantastisk dag 🙂👍
The thing is, when you said about drinking. I consider myself to be kind caring, loving, affectionate, a community person always will to lend a hand where necessary. But I drink sometimes in the summer and sometimes in the winter.
Discarding someone because they drink wouldn't necessarily be the only option. If you and I got on together really well to be in a relationship, and you mentioned that really you were looking for someone that doesn't drink I would say, OK, when would be the times I would be allowed to have a drink? At Christmas or a work party. Other than that, I would choose never to drink.
Would that be a deal breaker for you? Or would you see it as a compromise?
Compromise , I told my ex that I didn't want to drink heavily with him as I'm a mom and I'm an occasional drinker, he left and ghosted me haven't seen or heard from him since 3 weeks now, totally blanked ,after 13 months 😢, not a word I'm very unnerved and disgusted I was dumped because of alcohol it's such an insult , healing to you please god we will do better and heal , God bless you
Boom had/have narcissist dad, realizing my mom is a narcissist and a brother that's one. Plus had a narc in my life for three years...why can we not get them out of our head?
SHITS NOT NORMAL
They choose not to hear you, as if you're just using useless words to annoy them.
It is all very simple...To absolutely des-troy a Narc with EASE, All anyone has to do is lookup - 'Gaddis The Ayahuasca Wave', and have them read that whole page over and over again.. There is nothing they can say or do after that., And their BS is out of your beautiful life forever !.. ;)