Not long before my dad died, he once came up to me and said, "I'm going to give you something my dad never gave me." And then proceeded to hug me. I miss him so damn much.
As a kid, my dad once said, “I am not your friend, I am your Father. And if I’m a good Father, we will be great friends when you’re older.” Him and I are best friends to this day.
Now that I'm grown I feel I'm friends with my parents. Ofc the respect is still there, but we have talks on certain subj tht we wud have never discussed when I was a child. Such as family tea
Troy does make one good point. You can't go through life life worrying about if someone likes you or not because people are too judgmental. You do need to make sure people treat you with respect as long you respect yourself.
His son doesn't care if anyone likes him, he cares if his FATHER likes him. Big difference. If Troy would've LISTENED to the question instead of HEARING it he would've understood.
my father once grabbed me by the shoulder with a tear in his eye and said "son you mean so much to me but I will beat you like Cherokee drum if you slam the fridge again"
My favorite actor is Leonardo dicaprio...i can literally say I've seen almost all his movies and loved them all... however, denzel might be 2nd to me. He's fantastic.
@@Rican_VII They're definitely two great actors but every time I watch their films I see them still, I don't see the character they play. Al Pacino in the other end embodies the characters with an accent and everything as if they really exists. Only my observation
控え目 I never said anything about anybody’s skin color. That was you. I like this mans acting. I like his dialogue in movies. I also like his morals as a person as well as the morality of the characters he plays. One of my favorite actors and I feel like a good person. Am I allowed to have that opinion?!
I mean....yeah. Thats how family is. Theres is NO ONE anyone will meet in life that they like all the time. II have three siblings that I love to death, but that love is strong because we still care about each other even during the times we want to punch one another.
Exactly. "Like" and "love" are not the same thing, and you don't need to like someone to love them, that goes for anybody. I don't even always like someone I consider a friend, but I sure will always love them as a friend. Likewise, I can't say I always even like my parents, but it is both my duty and personal pleasure to love them. As cliche as it is, "love is a verb" is true. It's a voluntary choice, not based on fleeting emotions (that's called infatuation). With that said, I think this kid's question about whether or not his dad "liked" him isn't what he's actually asking. It's his young, juvenile way of trying to ask if his father loves and cares about him as a person, and his father pretty firmly denied him that positive affirmation and approval that he along with every boy needs and seeks from his father and or male role models (it's why a lack of a positive father figure is so detrimental to the development of boys and young men in society). It's not for a parent to be their child's "friend" in the way that their child is friends with their peers, though there is a diffference between being "friends/peers" and being friendly as a general attitude (and it is entirely appropriate to be friends when that child is a grown if you've raised your kid into a well-adjusted adult), but what you should do for them is to make sure that they know they are loved and that you care about them and their welbeing as a person. Doing the bare minimum to honor one's parental responsibilities by simply putting food on the table, clothes on their back and a roof over their head is not the same as being a good parent. Like Denzel said, that part is his job as a parent and a father. That's like demanding to be made employee of the month when you only do just enough work to stay employed or if you hope to be made validictorian as a C-student.
Sometimes a boy just wants to know wether or not he is loved..... And if no one tells him..... Things get messy. (Wow.. This is the most responses I've had in youtube. ty ty)
The tough thing about it is how the parents respond, and it seems to change our expectations at first on how it will go. But the only reason why some kids do this is because they feel so down on themselves on how their parents may look at them, so they want answers that can relive all that negativity weighing down on them, their self-worth. They are kids growing up dealing with their own problems. They just want some assurance that that they are loved. Sure the world have cruel people and they can't worry about people like that who may use and abuse them. But when it comes to support, that will be brought up as a result of someone's wavering self-esteem. I have to keep me mind of Troy's psyche, as his mother left him with lies and his father was abusive. That can get into a person's mind, and they lived based on how the child lived around it as they grow up. Cory didn't know at the time as he sees Troy always so angry.
This is why our kids are messed up today, we as parents try to be our kids friend and not they parent ..he clearly explained to him life..its not about likes ..get a girl u want someone to like u
@@dbdh1358 Bro. There's a balance though. You can't treat your child like he's a damn pet. He has some good points, but damn is it too much to show your child some love?
Db* Dh preach that’s my grandfather talking to my dad and he stumbled in life but I got that same message as my dad without my grandfather saying not one of does words .......... it’s was all about his actions
Denzel is great in this scene, no doubt... But the stage performance James Earl jones delivered, gives you the chills.... I'm sure Denzel watched it dozen times to prep
Totally agree i just seen it for the first time today, and this scene just doesn’t have the gravity of the play. Denzel was amazing but Earl Jones was next level 😮
I'd say that the acting style of both match the respective mediums. In Denzel's case, it is more subdued as film captures more subtle expressions, while projection is key for stage, which James Earl Jones had in spades.
The boy was just looking for one "I love you son" by his dad. Some parents think that because they supply food, shelter and clothing they are great parents when they don't.
1:46 _Now, don't you go thru life worrying about whether somebody like you or not. You best be making sure they're doing right by you. You understand what I'm saying?_
People bypass this and think he’s a bad father but is missing the education he’s bestowing onto his son. He clearly loves his child he’s training him for the world the real world , he’d thank his father in the future if it was real
Reading some of these comments i realise how lucky i am. My dad is a retired police officer of 37 years, strong and quiet. He has always told me he loves me and still does to this day. He hugged me the other day after not seeing me for 3 days.
james earl jones really had that intensity that made you freeze in place during this scene. denzel is saying a lot of hurtful things but the way he says it makes it sound like he's also hurt. there's this extra layer of depth not only because of the way he delivers it but also how his eyes look just goes to show that good actors really know how to put their own personal spin on a role and still be amazing no matter how different they are
@@j.leonardo260Yea but I don’t think that makes his character interesting that way. I believe it’s more interesting when your character has shades of grey. In this scene Denzel has a point but is going about it wrong
Sooo glad my father didn't subscribe to this "tough love from a distance" type of parenting. He was firm when necessary but loving and caring at all times...
Depends on the person, there’s no guide when parenting naturally. The way you parent is based on your OWN instinct and consideration with how your parents raised you.
I'm afraid you didn't understand the movie right. It's not about 'tough love', it's about 'tough' period. There's no love in that guy's heart, for better or worse.
U sound spoiled. A child should be happy to at least have a parent doing right by them. So many deadbeat parents. Liking a child is a luxury to the child and an option to the parent.
@TCT usually because of culture, including the female partner and/or family wanting a kid. In this case, she likely wanted the kid. So she can like the kid, but the father’s responsibility is to do right by the kid (including both parents making sure kid grows right, so i lost you there). Worse is there are parents that’ll say i love u but dont do jack for the kid. Those are the kids who get confused and messed up.
Difficult. Viola Davis was amazing in this as well. Stole a little of his Oscar thunder I'd say. Honestly, I thought Casey Affleck definitely deserved it as well. His performance in "Manchester by the Sea" was something special.
I think people get confused because they can't separate the awesome way Denzel delivered these lines and the horrible context of the words he delivered. A Father should know his Son idolizes him and he shouldn't just like him but love him. My Father clothed and fed me but he also hugged me and told me he loved me. He was my best friend until the day he died. I remember we were playing a Little League baseball championship and my Father said he couldn't make it because he had to work. I was at bat and I saw my Father running to watch the game. I cried like a baby in front of the team and we won the game. I hope Father's know the most manly thing you can do is take care of your family and not just like but love your kids. I understand the story though. The way some men and women are raised makes it hard for them to show emotions to their kids.
But the thing is denzel said he loved him but in a roundabout way. My grandpa was the same way as denzel, never said he loved me etc. but at the end of his life he made sure I knew he loved me mentally, verbally, spiritually, everything
Son: Needs to listen and read between lines Father: Needs to understands that Mr WRAN will promote him to Director if he works hard enough Mr WRAN : doesn't like father but can recognise hard work. Moral: Son needs to use the education father has given him and apply for a job with Mr WRAN as fathers line manager...🤣
I think Denzels character felt trapped by his life. He felt limited even though he had a good wife and family. That's why he cheated. It's hard to show genuine love to someone you see as an obligation and not a gift.
@@kevinjackson7125 he is showing love. He not giving no stranger this lecture bc he dont care about a stranger. He telling his so this bc he love him. Trust me I all men in my life was the same way
I have no idea why people are praising this character Denzel is playing. Saying "i don't raise you because i like you, i raise you because I'm obligated." Is one of the most horrible things you can say to your son. Some people are just terrible and they disguise it as some sort of righteousness for their own Ego's sake.
Exactly. Plus this is out of context. If you see everything that led to this and what happens ever, you get a whole idea of who this guy is and it is not good.
I would never be a parent like this and wasn’t raised this way but he’s saying I owe you this responsibility to take care of you because I brought you into the world
The other day, my older niece was playing one of these games where you ask young children a list of questions to see their candid responses...usually funny. My niece asked my then 9 year old, "Who loves you the most?" and, with no hesitation, he said, "My Dad.." I overheard the game from the next room, and I cant lie, I choked up...
Can’t worry about someone liking you. Hell I don’t even care if you tell me you love me. Showing that love means so much more than hearing “I love you” a million times
My dad had never showed love towards me, he had me when he was 15 & it would make me feel bad because he would never say he loved me or hugged me or show any affection & then I realized that it was because my grandpa was the same way w him. I show my dad that i love him & hug him anytime i can & now he tried to do it back. Thats why w my son I hug him & remind him every day that i love him
Reminds me of my father, he raised me by himself although that must have been hard he was never loving. My father and I don’t have much of a relationship today, we don’t hug or show affection, but the best complement I got from him when he saw me with my son and told me Ive been a much better father then he ever was.
Me and my dad have a great relationship. I have a great career and now have a wife and son of my own. I never questioned if my father “liked” me even though he was tough on me. That relationship with your parents is everything.
This was my dad, I eventually distanced from him, as I got older he would complain that I would not treat him like a father, that's because he never treated me like a son.
Honestly Denzels character is just saying that stuff cause he's disappointed that his son doesn't realize all of his hard work is because he loves him. He really wanted him to say "because you love me." But since the son didn't say the dad made it seem like only does it cause he has to.
I'm from Pittsburgh. Tons of relatives from the "Hill District". I even met August Wilson in person while in downtown Pittsburgh. Denzel should have received an Oscar. His role of the father was the embodiment of many of the elder men and mentors in my life in Pittsburgh. My father, granddad, uncles and elder hardworking family men in my community. Every time I see him in the role he really reminds me of them. Not perfect, but proud and purposeful. He is one of my favorite people and actors!!!
He did his son the biggest favor. "Don't you go through life worrying about whether somebody like you or not - you best be sure they doin' right by you!" If you're conditioned to go through life trying to appease people and make them like you - you get NOTHING.
"He's a good man and father." Lmao, he cheated on his wife and lost her. He only got "his" house by stealing his brother's war pension. One son ended up in jail and the other lost out on a football scholarship to go to college (because his dad was jealous) and refused to go to the dad's funeral. Hug your kids and tell them you love them ffs.
It's a good lesson, but you know what's better? Having a father who unapologetically likes and loves you. My father is a hard and strong man, but he never hesitates at the chance to let me know he loves me. It's the kind of man I try to be.
Any smart young man should know that words are not enough. Back in the days men married women and no one talked about love. Treat her right, take care of the home and the kids, respect her and she is submissive. They built strong relationships and lived till death did them part. Now after the first date we start saying i love you and within weeks the relationship is over. Why did love not sustain them?
@@derekngum4675 Submissive? Sorry man, Marriage is an equal pact. Submissive went away with the 50's. Your head is in the right place until you said submissive.
@@derekngum4675 people didn't talk about love because they were being guilt-tripped into not doing so and insecure about it. And stayed together because it was damn near impossible to get a divorce and if you did, you were a social pariah, especially in the upper classes.
I think Earl's delivery was better. Denzel's feels too rushed, almost no pauses, words don't seem have the same impact. It's like he's supposed to be educating his son, letting the words sink in, but it feels like he just hastily recites his lines with a bit of "Denzel" thrown on top.
Well I tell my son about this world, but I still tell him I Love him everyday for the simple fact You never know when it’ll be the last time you get to tell em
One thing I can say about my father rest his soul he taught me game a lot of game about life and how cold and cruel it can be but he was somebody I could talk to you make me feel like s*** when I asked him a question about life for for advice there's some fathers who take the disciplinarian role too far sure you got in still responsibility and discipline but some people just let it go to their head like I said my father taught me a lot of game and he just had conversations with me a lot of boys just want to be able to talk to their dad about experiences so they can learn
Having to justify why you don't like someone is also not a law. He doesn't owe the kid anything but gives him everything he has available to him. If his son can't see that it is true love his father has for him then he is just being ungrateful.
@Conrad Ferrus Glad to hear your perspective on it, though the way you read a situation is more about you and your personal experience in life, as is mine.
@@romeosra i dont think its a weird interpretation for the boy to see his fathers actions as being done out of duty and not out of love. In fact, isnt that what he directly says? That he is only doing his duty as a father putting food on the table for him.
Denzel proved again, in this movie, why he is one of the best actors in the business! It’s almost magical when he’s on the screen. As black people, we are so proud of Denzel! His son is starting to become a good actor, in his own right! Peace.
True. Me, as a half white half Asian guy, Denzel is just my most favorite actor of all time. He is straight at the top of my list. He is just solid and so incredibly charismatic and versatile and fantastic at everything. And never would I ever get tired of him. He is really a gem. A really really big fan!!
@@Izaan2810 - I and, other black people, are very proud of him as an actor. He, too, is perhaps my favorite actor. Yes, he is very versatile and, usually, takes only good roles. He’s at that status where he can pick the truly good roles that he desires. Also, I am watching his son because I can see a fine actor, taking after his famous father. Only time will really tell, of course. I will continue to watch them both because, I know, that whatever role that they do will be fascinating. Peace.
@@darincampbell467 True. A really big fan of both of their work. John David is just getting better and better each movie and is legit killing it. He is definitely making his dad proud and would continue to nail it. Denzel is really THE pride of cinema with his incredible talent and intelligence. Peace, my friend.
My old man was stern too. I never understood why when I was younger, but as I got older. I realized, he was raising me to have a thick skin, and be able to survive on my own in this harsh world, I am forever thankful for that. The problem today is a lot of parents are more concerned with their kids liking THEM now, instead of teaching them the necessary skills to handle the real world.
True but you cant always be too strict either. Your child will grow up bitter and cold. Broken. Carrying a rock and grudge. A good balance of love and tough love.
I'm not at all disagreeing with you, I just perhaps had a very easy upbringing. I need to ask you, so as to understand, what harshness in the world did you encounter that you think you wouldn't have survived had your dad's stern attitude not primed you for it?
If he was anything like this then he was just a bad parent. Kids later in life tell them selves what ever abuse or lack of love they suffered was "for the ultimate good" Because it helps them cope with having parents who sucked at being parents. It's why things like physical abuse often become cyclical. Some people just happen to have kids but not everyone is capable of being a good parent.
It shouldnt be one or the other. World would be hella better if parents taught their kids the necessary skills for the world AND liking their kids. Sadly, lots of parents are never really ready to have kids yet they have them.
James Earl Jones, in the theatre play, delivers this just as masterfully, with his own signature, but a very subtle difference - in the very end of the speech, along with his face softening emotionally, he displays a quick tender gesture on his son, almost betraying himself in showing him what he always indeed felt other than just liking him…
My dad and I always fought when I was growing up. Recently he's gotten really sick. He said to me "We ain't got to like each other, but God damn it I love you."
@kimanih6903 melodramatic?? Are you kidding me, my friend?? The legendary James Earl jones work is beyond extraordinary!! His acting range matches the heavy demands of a role that is virtually classic in its emotional compass. Jones, many moods extend from reflective musings and high good humor to bullying sarcasm and explosive rage. Mr. Jones responds equally to the mystical elements!! Now, don't get me wrong, Denzel's performance off Broadway and to the big screen speaks for itself!! But to say it's melodramatic is a little off base and honestly quite wrong!!
I cried at this scene in the movie theater because it reminded me of my Daddy who we had just lost not too long prior. You get what you get because that's all he had to give. PERIOD.
DudeDad the whole point of this scene is that Denzel doesn’t like his son because he LOVES him. Hence all the stuff about breaking his back to support him and make sure he never wants for anything.
@@BuddhaBless328 Don't worry, that'll be lost on most. And in the James Earl Jones version when he says "make sure people do right by you" he pulls the child in and plants a hand on his chest and another on his shoulder in a loving way. He spends the entire time telling him to get over being liked and know who does right by you, sending home the message he is loved. It'll take a child years to get it but they'll never forget it.
@@BuddhaBless328 - No. It's not love he's expressing. It's obligation. There was nothing loving in that speech. Troy was not a man who was loved in his own childhood, so where would he get that from? What he's talking about in that scene is transactional. "I'm doing what I'm supposed to do." That's not love.
BuddhaBless328 No. He even uses the example of his boss giving him the paycheck because it’s his duty further implementing the fact that he doesn’t do the things he does for his son because he loves him. He does it because that’s the unspoken but agreed upon transaction that was made. You came from me into this world so I will take care of you because it’s my duty.
I understand my father. Military, Mississippi man . He never told me he loved, but he damn well showed it. What is undestood, dont need to be explained. I love you pops, the greatest man i know. Thank you for teaching me THE REAL WORLD. ON GOD!
This how old school men used to think... they had a lot of pressure on their shoulders and had to be tough or at least act like it. He was just preparing his son the best way he knew.
in fact, it's not just how men thought -- mothers, too, were taught that "coddling" a son with talk of love and affection would lead to a weak adult. thank god countless studies in the 20th century disproved that. (kids actually become more self-reliant and stable when they grow up with support and attention)
Just here to say my daddy was there half the time and whenever I really really needed him He was there! He may not said much or did much but he did the most , made me the person I am today .
Lmao. Everyone in the comments is trying to pull life lessons from this movie meanwhile im just picking my jaw off the floor after witnessing this glorious acting by Mr. Washington
Damn bro. This is so real. Now I understand my mother. Im27 and just learning this. This is the reality because our parents will not be around to help us forever and we need to grow up. And sometimes as their children we just don't listen so they have to talk to us this way. But they love us and do it for our own good. Let the tears out and straighten up little soldier
My dad has never told me he loves me. Yet I know he does for the matter that hes not really my dad but he took me as his own and raised me. He fed me and close me the best he could grew up dirt poor but he did what he could
@Tom Ross TV lol why does that matter ? i'm pretty sure latino people, or indian & Indonesian people living in poverty could come to the same conclusion. EVERYONE & every situation is different.
@@bane3991 it was the step dad that raised him. The step dad could have decided not to be in a relationship with a woman who already has a kid. But instead he 'stepped' up to be the man in Rick's life that his biological father wouldn't be
Watching this as an adult I now realise the pain in Denzels face. He was trying to give his son a life lesson about being a man, and it was a damn harsh one. Such a great scene.
I’m all for tough love but if your child is that age and still wondering why he’s not loved then that’s a failure on the father. He looked at him as a job, a responsibility. Not a son.
True fools think being a parent is simply putting food on the table and just ignoring your child's emotional needs and wants. In this world no one is owed is anything, and that includes love. And the only one who can provide love and comfort is your parents, and if you are a parent that is depriving your child out of that, your child will eventually distance themselves from you and approach those who loves them.
@@RestIess.Gambler Growing up with a father like this lead me to search for love in all the wrong places. Now I've found Jesus Christ who gives all the love I want. Loving your child, though, is a requirement. And your son or daughter should hear that from you. I want my child to know I love them until they're annoyed by it.
My dad was alot like this and I had a hell of a childhood dealing with him, but ill never forget when I got real sick years back and was literally on my death bed my dad held me with a panicked and helpless yet sincere loving voice telling me he loved me, and he couldn't lose me and that moment was the only reason I forgave him for all the years of him abusing me verbally and physically. But that moment was special to me and it came at the worst time in my life.
Great movie, can be a rollercoaster to watch if you had similar experiences growing up. My father left when I was 6 months old and I’ve only ever met him once since then. Sometimes I wish I had a tough father rather than no father. If there is one thing I have learned is that if I ever have kids, I won’t abandon them and I won’t be tough on them, I’ll just be there. It’s all about breaking the cycle.
I take this as more an opportunity to instill a substantial lesson in a son about duty. That sometimes, the world is cruel and “liking” someone is for people who are provided for, not necessarily for those who are struggling. It’s a struggle against them as a family because of societal oppression back then, at least the value of this family is learned through backbreaking pain. Denzel does an amazing job. I feel for his character but agree encouraging your kids that you are grateful to have them rather than calling them a burden is love with fathering, not just leaving it at “I don’t have to like you”.
It’s a good life lesson. Because when your parents are gone. No ones a real friend. People talk to hear themselves. Respect yourself and the people you look after cause that’s all you got.
His son thought that he didnt like him because Denzel's character never supported him on the things HE wanted to pursue with his life. Denzel wanted him to live his life in a manner HE thought was best....sad story but I can relate.
@DBZaniack247 You keep saying this like that’s all kids want from their parents. That’s the BARE MINIMUM you are SUPPOSED to give your children. By choosing to bring them into the world to begin with that’s what is owed. It’s not something to be used to guilt trip your kids into living their lives the exact way the parents want, and it certainly doesn’t make someone a “good” parent. Parents will act like this and then wonder why their kids don’t interact with them once they’re adults.
When you're black in America, providing is about 75% because it takes everything you have just to provide the basics. It takes strong men not to walk away.
A lot of talk about taking care of his son and doing right by him, but he neglected to consider that showing his son any sort of affection or making him feel valued as a human being was a part of that
I feel more strongly for this scene as I am currently a meter away from my dad's coffin, attending his Funeral Wake. My dad wasn't like this, he gave me freedom, was considerate and loving. Though now that he is gone, I will now carry the responsibilities he left me and be a good man and a good father to my future children.
And that, is one of the greatest ways that you can honor your father. Live life, Love yourself & others, & with every decision you make, make it with wisdom. GOD BLESS YOU.
@@homage1208, Its a "Funeral Wake", not a Funeral, learn the difference. I keep watch over his coffin at night all throughout till the morning rise. No one else is around here, I am the only one to stay awake and keep watch over him. What do you expect me to do, stare into nothingness everyday? I search in the internet for things that reminds me of him, and now you say things as if you know me and that I don't respect my father. You're the one disrespectful here.
When me and my father watched that part he said" some days I like you son but the main reason why I take care of you is because I love you and it's a parents responsibility to take care of their child." Btw he's my step father and he chooses to do this
do what’s right, not just “nice.” That’s what he was trying to say. times have changed. duty and responsibility are dead. It’s literally all about the ‘likes’. That said, the kid did just want a little affection from his dad. In that sense, it was hard to see the dad miss that hint so hard and then rant about something not related to affection.
Exactly. To add to what he said, I would have said: but it's also my responsibility to love you and to make sure that I can help you along when you need it. Because that's what Dad's do.
August Wilson plays are so emotional. Denzel and Viola are just amazing in this. This scene is a rollercoaster from anger to sad and back to anger. Other than Tom Hanks IMHO, Denzel deserves the title best leading actor working(Daniel Day Lewis is retired).
*"Don't you go through life worrying about if somebody like you or not. You best be making sure, they're doing right by you"* BEST ADVICE EVER! Respect, Diginity, Responsibility, Self-Respect and Self- Worth all in one statement.
The best my dad did for me at 9yo was teach me an old school street fighting technique & also teach me how not to be a father. He died right before my daughter was born, I met him when I was 9 & I only spent a week with him. I didn’t like him, bc I felt to grown, I thought I knew everything @9 years old. I thought my mom could teach me everything, bc she had did such a great job. Boy was I wrong. I messed around & ruined something oso special. But S/O to my grandfather! That’s a real individual. A standup man. That’s the best I’ve ever had. I start to tear up thinking of losing him.
It's worrying how many people think this father's words are true and should be lived by. People don't understand how negatively life altering those two minutes could be to hear that from the person that brought you into this world.
@@tacoabeast8385 Beta male? Lmaoooo. The actual “Alpha” males are the ones that cares for their kids and treat them with love, they are the leader of the family after all. That’s if that “alpha sigma male” bullshit is even true.
@@hjj9269You only gave part of the Alpha definition. And treating them with love means you have to give them tough love sometimes...You must be a beta too
I love my kids. From the moment they are born love is a natural thing. Hug them and tell them how much you love them is what I believe everyone should do and say.
My Dad never said he loved me or hugged me, it wasn't in him. He showed us he loved us by busting his butt taking care of us. I miss talking to him. RIP Dad.
Troy struck me as the type of man who never loved his children. Like they made his life harder by being born. He provides for them which is a one up but he never offers them any support or encouragement because of his low upbringing.
James, i would disagree with that. In this scene he is teaching him a lesson that i believe every father should. (Keep in mind that he never said he didnt like or love him)
@@Tae.B. I have. Point I'm really trying to make is that Troy wasn't worth much as a human being. He had a low upbringing sure and you can say that's why he was bitter. But that only goes so far. Nobody forced him to become a criminal and he had no good reason whatsoever to cheat on Rose and father a child with Alberta.
@@jamespoledna2693Correction: he didnt have a "low upbringing" in this role. The father clearly stated to the audience that he gives him everything that is necessary
My Haitian father had 3 GOLDEN rules 1.U not bring home "A"s for me u doing it for yourself. 2.Once your 18 I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE for u get your act together n get a job. 3.If u ever go to jail don't bother calling me n u can remove your last name while u at it also cause u no longer good enough to represent the family last name. That alone is what made me n 11 of his children what they are STRONG,
Just watched James Earl Jones's rendition of this scene. Two drastically different approaches to the same scene, both beautifully done, amazing performances.
I almost died a few years ago, and lost a leg during the incident. Its a long story, but the point is my dad was with me every single day i needed him, as was my mother and sister. They stood beside me no matter what. Family is everything.
Don't be going though life wondering if somebody likes you or not, you best be making sure they are doing right by you. That is the best life advice ever.
My 3 brothers and i were raised by our grandfather who was first generation born in america.He was very much like this, but he let you earn his affection. If you did, he was one hilarious and loving man, but you really had tp earn it. I am the youngest and he died when i was 17. Im 35 now and even though i have lived longer without him than with him, i atill think of him and all he taught me from life lessons and cooking, to woodworking, electrical work or welding. Just because a parent is stern, doesn't mean they don't care.
Denzel transcends race, color religion....in all his performances! One of the greats...if your a man doing what needs to be done in this day and age... This scene touches you. White, black, brown whatever.. he taught his son something very important here.... Bravo Denzel!!
Teaching a lesson and fueling a horrible life altering change in someone so that they may reject any form of compassion or crave it to the point of dumping to the ends of the earth are different things. Teach him a lesson that doesn’t make him want to kill you or himself. He’s growing, you’re not helping if you do that
@@MustacheManBoyHairyManChild Well it's a matter of perspective. His father hasn't known love to try and give it to someone else. He makes up for it in the crucial life lessons he teaches. It's a give and take.
@@Junior-yv8bg If he didnt love him then he would kick him out of the house and not provide for hin. Parents, especially parents of a racial minority often have a tough time showing love through words. However their actions speak for themselves.
My father talks like that. He’s on his 3rd marriage because he beat my mom and step mom. The kind of father that wants you to feel guilty for being born, usually has some skeletons in their closet.
Yeah, like me finding out 14 years after my father died that I have an older sister at 52. And dude raised me as militant my whole life only to find out he rejected his half white daughter.
When you say (their) I’m guessing you wasn’t just talking about you dad & u called him father no one would ever do tgat if they father did anything to hurt them or their mother & you said step mom meaning you stay with your abusive dad the whole time to see your mother & stepmom get beaten & if that’s so I hope they are okay an out of that relationship & you should far away from that man as well
And this was "How to end up in a nursing home with kids who never visit 101". If your child has to come and ask why you dont like or love them then you have FAILED as a parent. While everything he said is technically true a child should never have to wonder whether their parents love them. A father should teach a son that he is loved by his parents and to not worry about whether other people like them or not. You can do both. If my father EVER gave me this speech I would put him in a nursing home and leave him there. And inevitably when he calls to ask why I dont visit I would throw his speech right back in his face. "What law says I got to visit you? You eat every day? A roof over your head? Clothes on your back? Visiting you wasnt part of the bargan."
James Earl Jones captured the anger of this scene. But Denzel perfectly showed pain through his eyes at the end. There was an earnestness in his words. What a masterful interpretation.
Not long before my dad died, he once came up to me and said, "I'm going to give you something my dad never gave me." And then proceeded to hug me. I miss him so damn much.
Wow im really sorry
Troy never received love so he does not know how to give it
Fman1292 Bro what?
@Fman1292 💪you're a smart warrior bro. Keep it up, respect from a 17 yo British kid
Sorry to hear that man
As a kid, my dad once said, “I am not your friend, I am your Father. And if I’m a good Father, we will be great friends when you’re older.” Him and I are best friends to this day.
Now that I'm grown I feel I'm friends with my parents. Ofc the respect is still there, but we have talks on certain subj tht we wud have never discussed when I was a child. Such as family tea
Respect
That's a true father
@@A_NotesThat’s a great line and a great way to view fatherhood. I’m gonna use that with my future kids.
@A_Notes you find out a lot about your uncles divorce after that 18th birthday party😅
Troy does make one good point. You can't go through life life worrying about if someone likes you or not because people are too judgmental. You do need to make sure people treat you with respect as long you respect yourself.
Criminal records mattery very little in sports
His son doesn't care if anyone likes him, he cares if his FATHER likes him. Big difference. If Troy would've LISTENED to the question instead of HEARING it he would've understood.
Gary Mcguckin Thank you Gary. He was horrible. Point blank. The devil didn't deserve a father this bad, ignorant or mean.
Well, it’s his dad we are talking about
This is different. This is his father. As a father you're supposed to love your child no matter what.
my father once grabbed me by the shoulder with a tear in his eye and said "son you mean so much to me but I will beat you like Cherokee drum if you slam the fridge again"
LMAO
😂
Lmfao I’m howling
Is your dad Hobbs from 'Hobbs and Shaw'? Cuz that's literally the only time I heard someone say that.
@@Marcvelous3 I don't know who that is I first heard it from my dad... when I slammed the fridge after grabbing a tasty treat and was too excited.
I’m not sure if Denzel isn’t the best actor in Hollywood. I never get tired of watching him.
My favorite actor is Leonardo dicaprio...i can literally say I've seen almost all his movies and loved them all... however, denzel might be 2nd to me. He's fantastic.
Denzel the man
Clandestine Comments it’s a good character!! 😉
@@Rican_VII They're definitely two great actors but every time I watch their films I see them still, I don't see the character they play. Al Pacino in the other end embodies the characters with an accent and everything as if they really exists. Only my observation
控え目 I never said anything about anybody’s skin color. That was you. I like this mans acting. I like his dialogue in movies. I also like his morals as a person as well as the morality of the characters he plays. One of my favorite actors and I feel like a good person. Am I allowed to have that opinion?!
denzel washington is an excellent versatile actor.
I'd say fallen is my favorite of his.
General Zod nobody cares bud😭
@@supbape apparently, you did enough to comment.
@@supbape i care
supbape you must have forgotten this was a public comment section bud
My father once told me, "You're my son and I love you, I'll always love you. . . . . but I'm not always going to like you.".
Shut up foo
I mean....yeah. Thats how family is. Theres is NO ONE anyone will meet in life that they like all the time. II have three siblings that I love to death, but that love is strong because we still care about each other even during the times we want to punch one another.
Exactly. "Like" and "love" are not the same thing, and you don't need to like someone to love them, that goes for anybody. I don't even always like someone I consider a friend, but I sure will always love them as a friend. Likewise, I can't say I always even like my parents, but it is both my duty and personal pleasure to love them. As cliche as it is, "love is a verb" is true. It's a voluntary choice, not based on fleeting emotions (that's called infatuation). With that said, I think this kid's question about whether or not his dad "liked" him isn't what he's actually asking. It's his young, juvenile way of trying to ask if his father loves and cares about him as a person, and his father pretty firmly denied him that positive affirmation and approval that he along with every boy needs and seeks from his father and or male role models (it's why a lack of a positive father figure is so detrimental to the development of boys and young men in society). It's not for a parent to be their child's "friend" in the way that their child is friends with their peers, though there is a diffference between being "friends/peers" and being friendly as a general attitude (and it is entirely appropriate to be friends when that child is a grown if you've raised your kid into a well-adjusted adult), but what you should do for them is to make sure that they know they are loved and that you care about them and their welbeing as a person. Doing the bare minimum to honor one's parental responsibilities by simply putting food on the table, clothes on their back and a roof over their head is not the same as being a good parent. Like Denzel said, that part is his job as a parent and a father. That's like demanding to be made employee of the month when you only do just enough work to stay employed or if you hope to be made validictorian as a C-student.
Or I love you but I didn't like what you just did.
@@Tyler_W you're absolutely right.
R.I.P James Earl Jones. Just watched his original live on stage performance of this scene. Absolutely brilliant 💯🙏🏿
Yes incredible
Key word here is “don’t go through life worried about people liking you or not. Just live your life
You mean... Key 15 *WORDS*
Malik Aubrey 🙏 🙏 🙏 🙏 🙏
Yeah thats the point. But my god that kid is gonna become a miserable person when he gets older.
Malik Aubrey yep
That’s not a word
Sometimes a boy just wants to know wether or not he is loved..... And if no one tells him..... Things get messy.
(Wow.. This is the most responses I've had in youtube. ty ty)
The tough thing about it is how the parents respond, and it seems to change our expectations at first on how it will go. But the only reason why some kids do this is because they feel so down on themselves on how their parents may look at them, so they want answers that can relive all that negativity weighing down on them, their self-worth. They are kids growing up dealing with their own problems. They just want some assurance that that they are loved. Sure the world have cruel people and they can't worry about people like that who may use and abuse them. But when it comes to support, that will be brought up as a result of someone's wavering self-esteem.
I have to keep me mind of Troy's psyche, as his mother left him with lies and his father was abusive. That can get into a person's mind, and they lived based on how the child lived around it as they grow up. Cory didn't know at the time as he sees Troy always so angry.
This is why our kids are messed up today, we as parents try to be our kids friend and not they parent ..he clearly explained to him life..its not about likes ..get a girl u want someone to like u
@@dbdh1358 Bro. There's a balance though. You can't treat your child like he's a damn pet. He has some good points, but damn is it too much to show your child some love?
Db* Dh preach that’s my grandfather talking to my dad and he stumbled in life but I got that same message as my dad without my grandfather saying not one of does words .......... it’s was all about his actions
The word his sone used is "Like" though. Theres a huge difference in liking someone and loving someone.
My dad told me he loved me for the first time when I was 22 and I cried uncontrollably. The best day of my life
No shame in that bro. Your dad's a good man.
Same but I was 17
And I bet that had more value than just mindlessly saying it every day.
@@dinolover very true
Jesus.
Denzel is great in this scene, no doubt... But the stage performance James Earl jones delivered, gives you the chills.... I'm sure Denzel watched it dozen times to prep
Totally agree i just seen it for the first time today, and this scene just doesn’t have the gravity of the play. Denzel was amazing but Earl Jones was next level 😮
I'd say that the acting style of both match the respective mediums. In Denzel's case, it is more subdued as film captures more subtle expressions, while projection is key for stage, which James Earl Jones had in spades.
@@TheDarth24are you guys deaf and blind? Denzels was way better. 😅
The boy was just looking for one "I love you son" by his dad. Some parents think that because they supply food, shelter and clothing they are great parents when they don't.
True, but they are still a whole lot better than parents that choose not to supply any of those things for their kids.
It’s crazy how much I can see it both ways
Unfortunately, a stoic man considers providing to be his expressed way of loving. Men tend to demonstrate, not say..
he gave it to him , by being a dad, taking care of him , teaching him to become a man . He should him way beyond love
@@johndouglascross you can’t not like someone and love them at the same time, what are you talking about?
1:46 _Now, don't you go thru life worrying about whether somebody like you or not. You best be making sure they're doing right by you. You understand what I'm saying?_
“Yes sir”
This is the takeaway.
That’s the part where he actually swtiches to ”yes, I like you” but didn’t say it because he felt the need to teach him a lesson about how life works
@@drtmftr would’ve been better if he said yes and then proceeded with the lesson. Smh some people have issues expressing love.
People bypass this and think he’s a bad father but is missing the education he’s bestowing onto his son. He clearly loves his child he’s training him for the world the real world , he’d thank his father in the future if it was real
Reading some of these comments i realise how lucky i am. My dad is a retired police officer of 37 years, strong and quiet. He has always told me he loves me and still does to this day. He hugged me the other day after not seeing me for 3 days.
Ikr i hope some of the people in this comment section never have kids lmao
You’re lucky to have a father like that
@@emmanuelyasi8020 I know
I wish my Dad was still here to hug me.
@@origamipein18 for the last time i ain't yo dad fool!!! The DNA test said that there was only a 2% chance i was not yo dad and 2% is a big number!!!
james earl jones really had that intensity that made you freeze in place during this scene.
denzel is saying a lot of hurtful things but the way he says it makes it sound like he's also hurt. there's this extra layer of depth not only because of the way he delivers it but also how his eyes look
just goes to show that good actors really know how to put their own personal spin on a role and still be amazing no matter how different they are
Yeah. Both are really good, but I like James Earl Jones' delivery better. Troy's characterworks as a bitter old man who only cares about his job.
@@j.leonardo260Yea but I don’t think that makes his character interesting that way. I believe it’s more interesting when your character has shades of grey. In this scene Denzel has a point but is going about it wrong
@@gjjijjinot in the time they were in
Sooo glad my father didn't subscribe to this "tough love from a distance" type of parenting. He was firm when necessary but loving and caring at all times...
That's how it should be.
Depends on the person, there’s no guide when parenting naturally. The way you parent is based on your OWN instinct and consideration with how your parents raised you.
I'm afraid you didn't understand the movie right. It's not about 'tough love', it's about 'tough' period. There's no love in that guy's heart, for better or worse.
U sound spoiled. A child should be happy to at least have a parent doing right by them. So many deadbeat parents. Liking a child is a luxury to the child and an option to the parent.
@TCT usually because of culture, including the female partner and/or family wanting a kid. In this case, she likely wanted the kid. So she can like the kid, but the father’s responsibility is to do right by the kid (including both parents making sure kid grows right, so i lost you there). Worse is there are parents that’ll say i love u but dont do jack for the kid. Those are the kids who get confused and messed up.
The fact that Denzel Washington didn’t get an Oscar for this is outrageous💯
Difficult. Viola Davis was amazing in this as well. Stole a little of his Oscar thunder I'd say. Honestly, I thought Casey Affleck definitely deserved it as well. His performance in "Manchester by the Sea" was something special.
It wasn't a Good enough performance bc he came off as an unloving Dad to His own child. Its a sick thing and very wrong for Dads to be unloving.
John Akridge but the movie has good messages in it.
John Akridge that shows how good he played the role. You are not supposed to
Like him in this movie, and you seem to fall right for it
Denzel Washington: The coolest dude ever born.
I think people get confused because they can't separate the awesome way Denzel delivered these lines and the horrible context of the words he delivered. A Father should know his Son idolizes him and he shouldn't just like him but love him. My Father clothed and fed me but he also hugged me and told me he loved me. He was my best friend until the day he died. I remember we were playing a Little League baseball championship and my Father said he couldn't make it because he had to work. I was at bat and I saw my Father running to watch the game. I cried like a baby in front of the team and we won the game. I hope Father's know the most manly thing you can do is take care of your family and not just like but love your kids. I understand the story though. The way some men and women are raised makes it hard for them to show emotions to their kids.
what law says that??? LOL!
But the thing is denzel said he loved him but in a roundabout way. My grandpa was the same way as denzel, never said he loved me etc. but at the end of his life he made sure I knew he loved me mentally, verbally, spiritually, everything
Son: Needs to listen and read between lines
Father: Needs to understands that Mr WRAN will promote him to Director if he works hard enough
Mr WRAN : doesn't like father but can recognise hard work.
Moral: Son needs to use the education father has given him and apply for a job with Mr WRAN as fathers line manager...🤣
I think Denzels character felt trapped by his life. He felt limited even though he had a good wife and family. That's why he cheated. It's hard to show genuine love to someone you see as an obligation and not a gift.
@@kevinjackson7125 he is showing love. He not giving no stranger this lecture bc he dont care about a stranger. He telling his so this bc he love him. Trust me I all men in my life was the same way
I have no idea why people are praising this character Denzel is playing. Saying "i don't raise you because i like you, i raise you because I'm obligated." Is one of the most horrible things you can say to your son. Some people are just terrible and they disguise it as some sort of righteousness for their own Ego's sake.
Exactly. Plus this is out of context. If you see everything that led to this and what happens ever, you get a whole idea of who this guy is and it is not good.
THANK YOU. someone with a brain in these comments.
Unfortunately they fell victim to this kind of parenting, and the cycle of abuse will continue
I would never be a parent like this and wasn’t raised this way but he’s saying I owe you this responsibility to take care of you because I brought you into the world
@@scottyp2505this is the way it was to make your son a man, teaching him what comes first when you have a family and expect respect from others
I thought this would end up like a "I don't like you , I LOVE you" kinda thing... boy was I wrong
The other day, my older niece was playing one of these games where you ask young children a list of questions to see their candid responses...usually funny. My niece asked my then 9 year old, "Who loves you the most?" and, with no hesitation, he said, "My Dad.." I overheard the game from the next room, and I cant lie, I choked up...
You’re obviously an awesome Dad. Nice one 👍
Beautiful
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Much love to ur family ❤
Respect to you! Kids are the most honest people in the world. Anything they say is truth.
Too many children out there being raised without fathers, it's a detriment to the sons of this country.
Here🤚 and Anthony nailed it on the head. It affected my childhood. Im liking his comment for that.
@Toxic Grunt yeah right, theres definitely great men out there that were just raised by there mothers.
Mike Conville what was the point?
Mike Conville I don’t know why but you seem a lil salty...
Mike Conville I never said you weren’t I just said that you seemed salty. Interesting...
Can’t worry about someone liking you. Hell I don’t even care if you tell me you love me. Showing that love means so much more than hearing “I love you” a million times
My dad had never showed love towards me, he had me when he was 15 & it would make me feel bad because he would never say he loved me or hugged me or show any affection & then I realized that it was because my grandpa was the same way w him. I show my dad that i love him & hug him anytime i can & now he tried to do it back. Thats why w my son I hug him & remind him every day that i love him
You sound like a great father Carlos. I hope the best for you and your family!
That’s so sweet... I know you must be an amazing father
Well done Carlos for breaking that cycle. Bravo
Breaking that cycle. Ain't easy but neccessary.
You echoing my life man!
Reminds me of my father, he raised me by himself although that must have been hard he was never loving. My father and I don’t have much of a relationship today, we don’t hug or show affection, but the best complement I got from him when he saw me with my son and told me Ive been a much better father then he ever was.
Always send love where you don’t sense it. And congrats on breaking the cycle homie, Im sure your dad is more proud than he can express
great acting, horrible parenting. You can ruin a kid by not telling them you love them, and by making them feel guilty for you supplying for them.
a name Ong
You arent very smart if thats what you took from the scene...
Exactly
agree 100% 👍🏼
True but try to pay attention to the scene more and you will understand
Me and my dad have a great relationship. I have a great career and now have a wife and son of my own. I never questioned if my father “liked” me even though he was tough on me. That relationship with your parents is everything.
And you knew he loves you by providing for you and doing right by you.
A simple "no" would've sufficed.
And by no he means HELL no
@Trav true my dad tried that preach crap with me many times never did it work typical
It wasnt a yes or no question though
Son - " how come you ain't never like me?"
Father - "no"
that would of made no sense
🤣
Real N 😂😂
Denzel can be a motivator,a villain and a hero and he still can deliver lines like they have a powerful message behind them
This was my dad, I eventually distanced from him, as I got older he would complain that I would not treat him like a father, that's because he never treated me like a son.
asdf qwerty
That’s how it is for me. I have no relationship with my father. And I really don’t want one.
Did you starve at home?
@asdf.....I get and understand why and how you felt, but did you tell your father....WHY?
@@NikephorosCaesar being a parent is more then feeding your child.
Honestly Denzels character is just saying that stuff cause he's disappointed that his son doesn't realize all of his hard work is because he loves him. He really wanted him to say "because you love me." But since the son didn't say the dad made it seem like only does it cause he has to.
I always say this Fences is one of the most amazing acting performance by the lead actors in the history of film,Denzel and Viola killed it
They both should've won. Not just Viola.
Denzel is literally in the top 3 actors of all time.
Who are the other two?
@@marcdieubon6267 al pacino
@@ninoino8519 they're my two favorites
Top 6 not in Order :
Daniel Day Lewis
Gary Oldman
Joaquin Phoenix
Denzel Washington
Al Pacino & De Niro
@@buntaii9878 where is marlon Brando ?
I'm from Pittsburgh. Tons of relatives from the "Hill District". I even met August Wilson in person while in downtown Pittsburgh. Denzel should have received an Oscar. His role of the father was the embodiment of many of the elder men and mentors in my life in Pittsburgh. My father, granddad, uncles and elder hardworking family men in my community. Every time I see him in the role he really reminds me of them. Not perfect, but proud and purposeful. He is one of my favorite people and actors!!!
I'm from the Burgh too, and I thought this exact same thing before I scrolled down to read this comment.
He did his son the biggest favor. "Don't you go through life worrying about whether somebody like you or not - you best be sure they doin' right by you!"
If you're conditioned to go through life trying to appease people and make them like you - you get NOTHING.
Joshi The Yoshi Ik that but my dad was never like that
Welp welcome to the new era where "my fee fees" rule everything........
It's what make ppl act so fake, just so they can be liked
A Friendly Hobo Yeah well at least his father is being honest
A Friendly Hobo wym? The son asked if his dad LIKED him. Big difference between liking and loving someone. You could love someone without liking them.
"He's a good man and father."
Lmao, he cheated on his wife and lost her. He only got "his" house by stealing his brother's war pension. One son ended up in jail and the other lost out on a football scholarship to go to college (because his dad was jealous) and refused to go to the dad's funeral.
Hug your kids and tell them you love them ffs.
AMEN.
Yuuuppp very true
he thought he was doing the best that he could which ended up being the worst that he could
Was this what happened in the movie?
@@dh3940 yea
It's a good lesson, but you know what's better? Having a father who unapologetically likes and loves you. My father is a hard and strong man, but he never hesitates at the chance to let me know he loves me. It's the kind of man I try to be.
Any smart young man should know that words are not enough. Back in the days men married women and no one talked about love. Treat her right, take care of the home and the kids, respect her and she is submissive. They built strong relationships and lived till death did them part. Now after the first date we start saying i love you and within weeks the relationship is over. Why did love not sustain them?
@@derekngum4675 Submissive? Sorry man, Marriage is an equal pact. Submissive went away with the 50's. Your head is in the right place until you said submissive.
@@derekngum4675 people didn't talk about love because they were being guilt-tripped into not doing so and insecure about it. And stayed together because it was damn near impossible to get a divorce and if you did, you were a social pariah, especially in the upper classes.
@@RJSierraThat's exactly why women are the way they are today. Lol
@@derekngum4675yeah we got a redditor over here who wants a submissive kitten. 🤣💀💀
Denzel did James Earl Jones Justice with this performance. The original is just as good.
I just saw the clip with Jones and it was even better, and I'm a fan of both of them
James Earl Jones is a stern dad while Denzel Washington is a pathetic dad. Two sides of the same deadbeat coin, both are fantastic.
I think Earl's delivery was better. Denzel's feels too rushed, almost no pauses, words don't seem have the same impact. It's like he's supposed to be educating his son, letting the words sink in, but it feels like he just hastily recites his lines with a bit of "Denzel" thrown on top.
Eiind Yeah, that JEJ clip is one where you remind yourself to breathe.
if not better honestly
This is almost WORD FOR WORD a conversation I once had with my father. Powerful.
Read the THIRD word in my original post.
your dad didnt love you?
Pity
He read the play, for sure
He may have provided his son's basic needs, but he has royally failed in providing emotional support and needs.
That was his way of saying of course I love you.. sometimes pride and other things get in the way of actually saying those words🙄
Neil Taylor
If u can’t tell if your father loves u or not by judging his actions.
U a damn fool.
Yep
That’s the exact opposite of what he said.
Facts
@@TheAngryBadger3 in black folks terminology that clearly SAYS SON I LOVE U!
Well I tell my son about this world, but I still tell him I Love him everyday for the simple fact You never know when it’ll be the last time you get to tell em
Suwoop
You are a good dad
You’re a great dad.
One thing I can say about my father rest his soul he taught me game a lot of game about life and how cold and cruel it can be but he was somebody I could talk to you make me feel like s*** when I asked him a question about life for for advice there's some fathers who take the disciplinarian role too far sure you got in still responsibility and discipline but some people just let it go to their head like I said my father taught me a lot of game and he just had conversations with me a lot of boys just want to be able to talk to their dad about experiences so they can learn
“Don’t worry about somebody liking you just make sho' they doing right by you”
Not hope. Make sure
@@Samsonight33 your just repeating what the the comment just said lol dummy
@@jcherrax he was adding to the quote, the thought and the discussion -- and you added nothing. who's the dummy?
@@jcherrax comment was clearly edited lol
@@IrregularPineapples your moms the dummy 😎
This is how you lost contact with your kids when they leave.
This
The son wasn't even implying that he had to like him. He had a simple question, WHY, and never got an answer.
Having to justify why you don't like someone is also not a law. He doesn't owe the kid anything but gives him everything he has available to him. If his son can't see that it is true love his father has for him then he is just being ungrateful.
@Conrad Ferrus Glad to hear your perspective on it, though the way you read a situation is more about you and your personal experience in life, as is mine.
Conrad Ferrus guess so
@@romeosra i dont think its a weird interpretation for the boy to see his fathers actions as being done out of duty and not out of love. In fact, isnt that what he directly says? That he is only doing his duty as a father putting food on the table for him.
@@hakon7269 what is love but a night at the Roxbury.
Denzel proved again, in this movie, why he is one of the best actors in the business! It’s almost magical when he’s on the screen. As black people, we are so proud of Denzel! His son is starting to become a good actor, in his own right! Peace.
True. Me, as a half white half Asian guy, Denzel is just my most favorite actor of all time. He is straight at the top of my list. He is just solid and so incredibly charismatic and versatile and fantastic at everything. And never would I ever get tired of him. He is really a gem. A really really big fan!!
@@Izaan2810 - I and, other black people, are very proud of him as an actor. He, too, is perhaps my favorite actor. Yes, he is very versatile and, usually, takes only good roles. He’s at that status where he can pick the truly good roles that he desires. Also, I am watching his son because I can see a fine actor, taking after his famous father. Only time will really tell, of course. I will continue to watch them both because, I know, that whatever role that they do will be fascinating. Peace.
@@darincampbell467 True. A really big fan of both of their work. John David is just getting better and better each movie and is legit killing it. He is definitely making his dad proud and would continue to nail it. Denzel is really THE pride of cinema with his incredible talent and intelligence. Peace, my friend.
@@Izaan2810 - Good points! Peace to you!
My old man was stern too. I never understood why when I was younger, but as I got older. I realized, he was raising me to have a thick skin, and be able to survive on my own in this harsh world, I am forever thankful for that. The problem today is a lot of parents are more concerned with their kids liking THEM now, instead of teaching them the necessary skills to handle the real world.
True but you cant always be too strict either. Your child will grow up bitter and cold. Broken. Carrying a rock and grudge. A good balance of love and tough love.
I'm not at all disagreeing with you, I just perhaps had a very easy upbringing. I need to ask you, so as to understand, what harshness in the world did you encounter that you think you wouldn't have survived had your dad's stern attitude not primed you for it?
@@brianticas7671 Remember, those were different times. This generation is too soft
If he was anything like this then he was just a bad parent. Kids later in life tell them selves what ever abuse or lack of love they suffered was "for the ultimate good" Because it helps them cope with having parents who sucked at being parents. It's why things like physical abuse often become cyclical.
Some people just happen to have kids but not everyone is capable of being a good parent.
It shouldnt be one or the other. World would be hella better if parents taught their kids the necessary skills for the world AND liking their kids. Sadly, lots of parents are never really ready to have kids yet they have them.
James Earl Jones, in the theatre play, delivers this just as masterfully, with his own signature, but a very subtle difference - in the very end of the speech, along with his face softening emotionally, he displays a quick tender gesture on his son, almost betraying himself in showing him what he always indeed felt other than just liking him…
Yup, that's how it was with my dad. His old saying was, "IM NOT YOUR FRIEND, I AM YOUR FATHER."
Your*
I am you are father 😂
I tell me daughter that when she says that I’m mean. 😂 I say, “I’m not here for you to like me, I’m here to be your mother and protect you”.
It's weird seeing "you're" used incorrectly hahaha
Super Duty 455 Lol
My dad and I always fought when I was growing up. Recently he's gotten really sick. He said to me "We ain't got to like each other, but God damn it I love you."
The motto here is "I'm not your friend, I'm your father"
yeah, but do you like me though lol
@@mikophilo348 I dOn'T gOt To LiKe YoU!!!
Blows me away that a benevolent King can seem like a tyrant to a prince that will eventually become a benevolent King.
Exactly!
@@ydm760 What now?
I love Denzel performance on film in this movie, but the legendary James Earl Jones stage play for fences was on another level!! 💯
It's great that it pops up on tge recommended videos. Same source material but interpreted differently by two wonderful actors.
JEJ performance was melodramatic. Denzel's seems so realistic it turns your stomach.
@kimanih6903 melodramatic?? Are you kidding me, my friend?? The legendary James Earl jones work is beyond extraordinary!! His acting range matches the heavy demands of a role that is virtually classic in its emotional compass. Jones, many moods extend from reflective musings and high good humor to bullying sarcasm and explosive rage. Mr. Jones responds equally to the mystical elements!! Now, don't get me wrong, Denzel's performance off Broadway and to the big screen speaks for itself!! But to say it's melodramatic is a little off base and honestly quite wrong!!
I cried at this scene in the movie theater because it reminded me of my Daddy who we had just lost not too long prior. You get what you get because that's all he had to give. PERIOD.
💯
He never said his dad had to like him
He just asked why he didnt like him
DudeDad the whole point of this scene is that Denzel doesn’t like his son because he LOVES him. Hence all the stuff about breaking his back to support him and make sure he never wants for anything.
@@BuddhaBless328 Don't worry, that'll be lost on most. And in the James Earl Jones version when he says "make sure people do right by you" he pulls the child in and plants a hand on his chest and another on his shoulder in a loving way. He spends the entire time telling him to get over being liked and know who does right by you, sending home the message he is loved. It'll take a child years to get it but they'll never forget it.
@@BuddhaBless328 - No. It's not love he's expressing. It's obligation. There was nothing loving in that speech. Troy was not a man who was loved in his own childhood, so where would he get that from? What he's talking about in that scene is transactional. "I'm doing what I'm supposed to do." That's not love.
BuddhaBless328 No. He even uses the example of his boss giving him the paycheck because it’s his duty further implementing the fact that he doesn’t do the things he does for his son because he loves him. He does it because that’s the unspoken but agreed upon transaction that was made. You came from me into this world so I will take care of you because it’s my duty.
@@BuddhaBless328 That has no correlation if the reason the dad is doing all of these things is because he loves him.
Damn this really choked me up. Denzel is a once in a lifetime artist.
I understand my father. Military, Mississippi man . He never told me he loved, but he damn well showed it. What is undestood, dont need to be explained. I love you pops, the greatest man i know. Thank you for teaching me THE REAL WORLD. ON GOD!
This how old school men used to think... they had a lot of pressure on their shoulders and had to be tough or at least act like it. He was just preparing his son the best way he knew.
Sometimes the only way you know isn't a good way
@Travis Johnson sometimes the only way you know isn't a good way
@@jacobsaccount9353 damn! Say that again.
@Chris Spencer LOL
in fact, it's not just how men thought -- mothers, too, were taught that "coddling" a son with talk of love and affection would lead to a weak adult. thank god countless studies in the 20th century disproved that. (kids actually become more self-reliant and stable when they grow up with support and attention)
Just here to say my daddy was there half the time and whenever I really really needed him
He was there! He may not said much or did much but he did the most , made me the person I am today .
Lmao. Everyone in the comments is trying to pull life lessons from this movie meanwhile im just picking my jaw off the floor after witnessing this glorious acting by Mr. Washington
Want a cookie?
Exactly
James Earl Jones did it better.
@David Ortiz yes. He did
@David Ortiz yes. He did.
Damn bro. This is so real. Now I understand my mother. Im27 and just learning this. This is the reality because our parents will not be around to help us forever and we need to grow up. And sometimes as their children we just don't listen so they have to talk to us this way. But they love us and do it for our own good. Let the tears out and straighten up little soldier
My dad has never told me he loves me. Yet I know he does for the matter that hes not really my dad but he took me as his own and raised me. He fed me and close me the best he could grew up dirt poor but he did what he could
@Tom Ross TV lol why does that matter ? i'm pretty sure latino people, or indian & Indonesian people living in poverty could come to the same conclusion. EVERYONE & every situation is different.
Just because he fed you, clothed you, housed you doesn't mean he loved you. He's required by law to do that or else he'll go to jail.
@@bane3991 it was the step dad that raised him. The step dad could have decided not to be in a relationship with a woman who already has a kid. But instead he 'stepped' up to be the man in Rick's life that his biological father wouldn't be
Ten years later: Why doesn’t my son ever come to visit or call me?
He knows why. He knows. But it's too late to fix it.
Because he don't like me either.
As long as he's doing his duty, who cares.
@The Duke Of Flem All I'm saying is that Troy would 1 million percent disagree with you.
He never answered his question either. “Why don’t you like me?”
Watching this as an adult I now realise the pain in Denzels face. He was trying to give his son a life lesson about being a man, and it was a damn harsh one. Such a great scene.
I’m all for tough love but if your child is that age and still wondering why he’s not loved then that’s a failure on the father. He looked at him as a job, a responsibility. Not a son.
Agreed
I agree
Agreed.
He didn't ask if he loved him he asked if he liked him
Perfectly said
True fools think being a parent is simply putting food on the table and just ignoring your child's emotional needs and wants.
In this world no one is owed is anything, and that includes love. And the only one who can provide love and comfort is your parents, and if you are a parent that is depriving your child out of that, your child will eventually distance themselves from you and approach those who loves them.
Sometimes giving your child what he/she wants can spoil them
Love is not one of those things that spoils a child.
I sincerely hope you’re not using denzel’s character as an example... because if you are, you missed the point.
@@lcunash8093 this one.
@@RestIess.Gambler Growing up with a father like this lead me to search for love in all the wrong places. Now I've found Jesus Christ who gives all the love I want. Loving your child, though, is a requirement. And your son or daughter should hear that from you. I want my child to know I love them until they're annoyed by it.
I like when he says “straighten up god dam it”
I got heavy Vietnam style flashbacks of my pops after hearing that lol.
You like when he blasphemes the name of God?
Jerrell Simmons forreal man..my dad does the exact same thing when he’s pissed and he’s about to let me know wassup
@@claytonatkinson865 Chill out religious nut.
@@claytonatkinson865 ... he said got dammit... not god...
My dad was alot like this and I had a hell of a childhood dealing with him, but ill never forget when I got real sick years back and was literally on my death bed my dad held me with a panicked and helpless yet sincere loving voice telling me he loved me, and he couldn't lose me and that moment was the only reason I forgave him for all the years of him abusing me verbally and physically. But that moment was special to me and it came at the worst time in my life.
Why should it have to get to that point though?
@@sbrooks729unfortunately, it takes that much. It doesn't have to happen but some people don't know how to start changing
"Yea I know I'm just saying WHY don't you like me" lmao
One of the best movie scenes I’ve seen in a while
Great movie, can be a rollercoaster to watch if you had similar experiences growing up. My father left when I was 6 months old and I’ve only ever met him once since then. Sometimes I wish I had a tough father rather than no father. If there is one thing I have learned is that if I ever have kids, I won’t abandon them and I won’t be tough on them, I’ll just be there. It’s all about breaking the cycle.
I take this as more an opportunity to instill a substantial lesson in a son about duty. That sometimes, the world is cruel and “liking” someone is for people who are provided for, not necessarily for those who are struggling. It’s a struggle against them as a family because of societal oppression back then, at least the value of this family is learned through backbreaking pain. Denzel does an amazing job. I feel for his character but agree encouraging your kids that you are grateful to have them rather than calling them a burden is love with fathering, not just leaving it at “I don’t have to like you”.
It’s a good life lesson. Because when your parents are gone. No ones a real friend. People talk to hear themselves. Respect yourself and the people you look after cause that’s all you got.
Facts
thats bullshit it aint true just because you dont have friends it doesnt mean they dont exist
That's because no one likes you. It's not like that for us normal people
His son thought that he didnt like him because Denzel's character never supported him on the things HE wanted to pursue with his life. Denzel wanted him to live his life in a manner HE thought was best....sad story but I can relate.
So can I
Me too
Roof over your head, clothes on your back, food in your belly.
@DBZaniack247 You keep saying this like that’s all kids want from their parents. That’s the BARE MINIMUM you are SUPPOSED to give your children. By choosing to bring them into the world to begin with that’s what is owed. It’s not something to be used to guilt trip your kids into living their lives the exact way the parents want, and it certainly doesn’t make someone a “good” parent. Parents will act like this and then wonder why their kids don’t interact with them once they’re adults.
@@zzzohmy who hurt u fam? Mom or dad?
I don’t know how i feel about this. Providing for a child is half of it the other half is nurturing it teaching loving guiding.
When you're black in America, providing is about 75% because it takes everything you have just to provide the basics. It takes strong men not to walk away.
A lot of talk about taking care of his son and doing right by him, but he neglected to consider that showing his son any sort of affection or making him feel valued as a human being was a part of that
I feel more strongly for this scene
as I am currently a meter away from my dad's coffin, attending his Funeral Wake.
My dad wasn't like this, he gave me freedom, was considerate and loving.
Though now that he is gone, I will now carry the responsibilities he left me and be a good man and a good father to my future children.
And that, is one of the greatest ways that you can honor your father. Live life, Love yourself & others, & with every decision you make, make it with wisdom.
GOD BLESS YOU.
Posting a UA-cam comment at a funeral? Nice way to respect your dad.
@@homage1208, Its a "Funeral Wake", not a Funeral, learn the difference. I keep watch over his coffin at night all throughout till the morning rise.
No one else is around here, I am the only one to stay awake and keep watch over him.
What do you expect me to do, stare into nothingness everyday? I search in the internet for things that reminds me of him, and now you say things as if you know me and that I don't respect my father. You're the one disrespectful here.
@@homage1208, nice way to respect the mourners idiot.
Bro you posted this on the James Earl Jones stage version of this. How long you babysitting this corpse for?
When me and my father watched that part he said" some days I like you son but the main reason why I take care of you is because I love you and it's a parents responsibility to take care of their child."
Btw he's my step father and he chooses to do this
“Stand up straight got damnit”🤣🤣🤣
Mr Denzel Washington direct and star in this classic movie, wonderful acting by all the cast ❤
do what’s right, not just “nice.” That’s what he was trying to say. times have changed. duty and responsibility are dead. It’s literally all about the ‘likes’.
That said, the kid did just want a little affection from his dad. In that sense, it was hard to see the dad miss that hint so hard and then rant about something not related to affection.
Exactly. To add to what he said, I would have said: but it's also my responsibility to love you and to make sure that I can help you along when you need it.
Because that's what Dad's do.
August Wilson plays are so emotional. Denzel and Viola are just amazing in this. This scene is a rollercoaster from anger to sad and back to anger. Other than Tom Hanks IMHO, Denzel deserves the title best leading actor working(Daniel Day Lewis is retired).
*"Don't you go through life worrying about if somebody like you or not. You best be making sure, they're doing right by you"*
BEST ADVICE EVER!
Respect, Diginity, Responsibility, Self-Respect and Self- Worth all in one statement.
The best my dad did for me at 9yo was teach me an old school street fighting technique & also teach me how not to be a father. He died right before my daughter was born, I met him when I was 9 & I only spent a week with him. I didn’t like him, bc I felt to grown, I thought I knew everything @9 years old. I thought my mom could teach me everything, bc she had did such a great job. Boy was I wrong. I messed around & ruined something oso special. But S/O to my grandfather! That’s a real individual. A standup man. That’s the best I’ve ever had. I start to tear up thinking of losing him.
It's worrying how many people think this father's words are true and should be lived by. People don't understand how negatively life altering those two minutes could be to hear that from the person that brought you into this world.
Your either a woman or a Beta male...Because you sure dont underatand Men
@@tacoabeast8385 Beta male? Lmaoooo.
The actual “Alpha” males are the ones that cares for their kids and treat them with love, they are the leader of the family after all. That’s if that “alpha sigma male” bullshit is even true.
@@hjj9269You only gave part of the Alpha definition. And treating them with love means you have to give them tough love sometimes...You must be a beta too
@@tacoabeast8385Cringe
@@tacoabeast8385The only "beta" here is you, Mr. "TacoABeast"
I've watched this clip over and over. It never gets old
I love my kids. From the moment they are born love is a natural thing. Hug them and tell them how much you love them is what I believe everyone should do and say.
My Dad never said he loved me or hugged me, it wasn't in him. He showed us he loved us by busting his butt taking care of us.
I miss talking to him. RIP Dad.
Troy struck me as the type of man who never loved his children. Like they made his life harder by being born. He provides for them which is a one up but he never offers them any support or encouragement because of his low upbringing.
James, i would disagree with that. In this scene he is teaching him a lesson that i believe every father should. (Keep in mind that he never said he didnt like or love him)
@@Tae.B. he never said he did either.
@@jamespoledna2693 The whole point of saying what he said. Listen closely
@@Tae.B. I have. Point I'm really trying to make is that Troy wasn't worth much as a human being. He had a low upbringing sure and you can say that's why he was bitter. But that only goes so far. Nobody forced him to become a criminal and he had no good reason whatsoever to cheat on Rose and father a child with Alberta.
@@jamespoledna2693Correction: he didnt have a "low upbringing" in this role. The father clearly stated to the audience that he gives him everything that is necessary
Denzel going off on the poor boy, all he wants is some love and affection
@@Saturnia2014 are you speaking from experience?
That’s why he has a mother for
This scene is millennial kryptonite .
@@RobertM425 Nah, it's called abuse.
@@17thwonder Yep. And I've also seen my friends go through the same thing.
My Haitian father had 3 GOLDEN rules
1.U not bring home "A"s for me u doing it for yourself.
2.Once your 18 I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE for u get your act together n get a job.
3.If u ever go to jail don't bother calling me n u can remove your last name while u at it also cause u no longer good enough to represent the family last name.
That alone is what made me n 11 of his children what they are STRONG,
My dad was a a-hole like this. I make sure I love and actually listen to all my kids. I never want them to feel afraid of me. That’s not love.
My friend there is a difference between respect and being scared
He ain't a a hole here
Just watched James Earl Jones's rendition of this scene. Two drastically different approaches to the same scene, both beautifully done, amazing performances.
I think Jones' is better imo
I almost died a few years ago, and lost a leg during the incident. Its a long story, but the point is my dad was with me every single day i needed him, as was my mother and sister. They stood beside me no matter what. Family is everything.
Don't be going though life wondering if somebody likes you or not, you best be making sure they are doing right by you.
That is the best life advice ever.
My 3 brothers and i were raised by our grandfather who was first generation born in america.He was very much like this, but he let you earn his affection. If you did, he was one hilarious and loving man, but you really had tp earn it. I am the youngest and he died when i was 17. Im 35 now and even though i have lived longer without him than with him, i atill think of him and all he taught me from life lessons and cooking, to woodworking, electrical work or welding. Just because a parent is stern, doesn't mean they don't care.
Denzel transcends race, color religion....in all his performances! One of the greats...if your a man doing what needs to be done in this day and age... This scene touches you. White, black, brown whatever.. he taught his son something very important here.... Bravo Denzel!!
Troy did love his son. He was trying to teach him a lesson about a cruel world.
Teaching a lesson and fueling a horrible life altering change in someone so that they may reject any form of compassion or crave it to the point of dumping to the ends of the earth are different things. Teach him a lesson that doesn’t make him want to kill you or himself. He’s growing, you’re not helping if you do that
thank you end of convo
@@MustacheManBoyHairyManChild Well it's a matter of perspective. His father hasn't known love to try and give it to someone else. He makes up for it in the crucial life lessons he teaches. It's a give and take.
Yep it's called tough love. Alot of these young people need some of it
@@Junior-yv8bg If he didnt love him then he would kick him out of the house and not provide for hin. Parents, especially parents of a racial minority often have a tough time showing love through words. However their actions speak for themselves.
My father talks like that. He’s on his 3rd marriage because he beat my mom and step mom. The kind of father that wants you to feel guilty for being born, usually has some skeletons in their closet.
I'm a changed man who has learned from his mistakes I will never hurt you or mel like that ever again. Love dad
Yeah, like me finding out 14 years after my father died that I have an older sister at 52. And dude raised me as militant my whole life only to find out he rejected his half white daughter.
When you say (their) I’m guessing you wasn’t just talking about you dad & u called him father no one would ever do tgat if they father did anything to hurt them or their mother & you said step mom meaning you stay with your abusive dad the whole time to see your mother & stepmom get beaten & if that’s so I hope they are okay an out of that relationship & you should far away from that man as well
@@younglord8314 omg wtf
So true
And this was "How to end up in a nursing home with kids who never visit 101". If your child has to come and ask why you dont like or love them then you have FAILED as a parent. While everything he said is technically true a child should never have to wonder whether their parents love them. A father should teach a son that he is loved by his parents and to not worry about whether other people like them or not. You can do both. If my father EVER gave me this speech I would put him in a nursing home and leave him there. And inevitably when he calls to ask why I dont visit I would throw his speech right back in his face. "What law says I got to visit you? You eat every day? A roof over your head? Clothes on your back? Visiting you wasnt part of the bargan."
James Earl Jones captured the anger of this scene. But Denzel perfectly showed pain through his eyes at the end. There was an earnestness in his words. What a masterful interpretation.