Thinking of Breaking No Contact? Listen first! (The Love Chat)
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- Опубліковано 27 вер 2020
- Coaching service is available again - get coaching here: www.TheLoveChat.net/Coaching
What does the dumper go through?: www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzU5i...
What is my Ex thinking about during No Contact?: www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tXMW...
Time is everything when winning your Ex back!: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBoUb...
Will I ever hear from my Ex again?: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx9dR...
How to make your Ex regret dumping you!: www.youtube.com/watch?v=pk5F9...
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#getyourexback #nocontact #dating #howtogetyourexback #thelovechat
The Love Chat - Навчання та стиль
Friends,
Have you recently been through a breakup and need counseling?
Check out BetterHelp: www.betterhelp.com/Rory - (Get 10% off using that link.)
I am sponsored by BetterHelp and receive a commission. I believe in mental health counseling.
I believe in you Rory hahah
I've sent you a mail today... expecting your prompt reply. I trust you.❤️
If you got dumped they have to do total and absolute 100% of the effort. DO NOT, for the love of god, lift a single finger.
I agree absolutely
You're soooo right, now I need to remember that!
How though, its so hard not to reach out, im day 13,has he even noticed i havent contacted him!
@@suncloudx6502 my heart goes out for you.... The nostalgia wave is going to crush him and he will reach out. In the meantime, think about yourself and keep listening to Rory, I know it sounds cheesy, but it does help!
@@suncloudx6502 Yes it is hard but assuming you were unilaterally dumped, then why would you chase somebody that voted you out of their life? You're not going to talk them into changing their mind so don't bother.
The second you push that “send” button…
YOU… WILL… REGRET… IT.
I've stayed subscribed to this wonderful channel because I want to leave comments confirming Rory's teachings. My girlfriend of 2 years (best friend prior of 11 years) ghosted me about 5 months ago. I went into NC immediately, lost 80+ pounds, went back to school, went skydiving, went to therapy, hired a financial planner, and made new friends out of the coworkers I had been anti-social with for years now. The pain was unimaginable for a very long time, but no contact helps a great deal with self improvement helping a TREMENDOUS amount more. I do still miss her and I am still sad from time to time, but if you truly dive head first into self improvement, I promise you you can heal! Heal well, my friends!
@Magicman205 great comment and so true
awful experience.
you got this! :)
It´s been more than a year since NC, I have obviously moved on and have a different partner who's amazing, however, just to let you all know... they always come back, it doesn't matter how long it's been. Found out a day ago that he wants me back and it's the best feeling in the world to know that I don't!
dani-coronadoh
Great to hear that 😎🔝🔝🔝
This is an inspiration to me
Dani, so what happened when your ex came back? What’s your situation like?
@@yswen828 well, I am in a relationship with someone else so when a mutual friend told me about it I just laughed. I won't ever get back with him...
during they breakup, did u beg and plead... or broke no contact along the way prior of him reaching out?
Listen to Rory people! No contact works every time. Either they come back, or it will not matter to you in the end, regardless. Stay strong. You will not regret it. Its only a phase. Once you are out of it, you will have become a better version of yourself. Even though I am passed the "phase", I am still a subscriber. Rory is doing good to the world. I send my love to all the brokenhearted people out there. A broken heart means you have one. Embrace it!!
What if he respects me and loves me and cares for me but doesn't talk anymore?!
@@nxbxxha_1764 that means you’ve split up move on
I wasn't in danger of calling but moving forward has been a challenge. This helps. Thank you.
So pick your head, up and put the phone down.... you deserve better!
Priceless...:-)
Thanks for empathizing how if they ended it it’s THEIR job and we deserve more than what they delivered. This diverted some anxieties , grateful for ya Rory :•)
12 months now since breakup, found a new girl, still stings a bit but I feel normal again. The hardest thing to get over isn’t her, it’s what she inflicted on me. The betrayal, the confusion, the lack of communication , and throwing away a 5 years friendship, essentially making me grieve worse then the grief bestowed by the death of a loved one. That shit is hard to forget or even get over, how could I be so foolish, how could I think our relationship was so strong that nothing would separate us. Only to be dumped, out of the blue and completely blind sided, no warning signs and no explanation. Never take someone like that back....Never
Nobody leaves out of blue. Why to enter a new relationship when you obviously didn't heal?
sally scott yes they do, she did. And I have healed, but the trauma remains.
That's what hurts the most, I thought we had something special. We had problems but I thought our love was strong enough to weather the storms. It hurts that I was so wrong about her. Wrong about us. I feel for you.
21 days into no contact! she reached out to me 3 days into no contact the first time then left me on read so i continued it.
time is on your side! with time you start to feel better but yes, sadness comes in waves and unexpected sometimes. just going through the motions and gyming everyday. i got this and everyone else here has got this!
Hello. Yes, I’m talking to you. I’ve been here in this place 2 years ago. I was dumped by a man who was my everything for 2 years. I thought I was losing my mind. I was desperate, so I listened to Rory. I came back to his videos over and over for about 8 months and then I took a leap of faith. I moved to a different country, got a new job, moved to a new place, and completely turned my life around. It was a long, tedious and painful process, but I made it. After 2 years, I’m now in a healthy and beautiful relationship. My partner is reciprocating my love and my affection, and he is very supportive with regards to making my mental health a priority. I’m in therapy and I still have bad days from residual
trauma, but I am here. Please. Follow rory’s advice. Go no contact. Exercise. Go for a walk. Get into therapy. Go out with friends. Meet new people. Cry. Laugh. Scream. Get it all out! Trust me, I swear with my life, things will get better. Trust yourself and immerse in the healing process. Being dumped is the best gift that your ex could have given to you.
I’ve listened to so many NC vids and this is one that truly resonated with me- esp the part that the dumper owes it to us to do the bare minimum of making that bit of effort to reach out and work things out with us, if they so genuinely desire to do so. Why do we need to pick up the slack for them in everything?!
Know our worth people x
Damn bro that ending gave me energy to power through my day. You are honestly one of the best humans out there. Helping the broken. Empowering to make change and do better. If you’re ever in Houston. Send me a message. Dinner will be on me.
Almost four and a half months after breakup and no contact and I can say that I do not want her back... Finally. Yay!
Just got there after 9 months
@@JK-ni7gp good to see that, I'm at 4,5 months and still in so much pain
@@levicook8787 deal with the pain. Let that shit flow. You will become a star like me........
It is 100% because they’re lonely. So don’t fall for it right away. They need to prove themselves and that’s key.
BEST VIDEOOOO EVERRRRRRRR...... I WAS SO DEPRESSED TODAY! LISTENED TO THIS TO THE END! AND I WAS LIKE FFFFFFFFFFFKKK ITTTT.... I FELT SO MUCH BETTER!
I think that if you're thinking of breaking no contact then you should be prepared for the worst. No "I love you's" but "Oh, well, we, I've got someone else now". You have to be mentally strong enough and detached enough and healed enough in order to cope with this, so don't try until you have been in no contact long enough to do this. Better yourself, be independent and happy by yourself before you do this and I guarantee any bad news won't feel as bad. If it's good news then let him prove to you with actions and not just empty words he's still worth it. 🍒
Finally at the part where I know I deserve better in every way!
My advise to anyone going through a breakup is work on yourself & self improvement, don't run from the pain with alcohol or whatever coping habit you have and stay single until you are fully healed.
Obviously go NC for your you and if they come back you can decide if you even want them back.
Don't break no-contact, not unless you have shared assets or kids. Keep it professional in that case. No-contact is for you. Breaking it is an anxiety spiral. Focus on yourself, not the pedestal you put them on. I know that every day feels like forever when you're going through this. Allow yourself some time for grief every day, set aside five minutes, then focus on what you think doesn't make you happy anymore. You owe it to yourself to re-establish your sense of self and re-discover your passions and explore new things. This is an opportunity, not a death sentence. You don't have the weight of making someone else happy bearing down on you anymore, even if it feels like it.
Thank you for the wise words
Well thank you my friend. Yes I deserve much better. But guess what. After 10 mos of no contact yesterday he phoned to see how I was. I let it go to voice mail I don't answer unknown numbers. Said this is Harry how are you and the dog. Isn't it awful about this virus we don't have any music or anything. Bye dear. Imagine that crap. I did not respond to the call. He must be having a pity party . I have no intentions of calling him back. Dumping and ghosting was way to much for me. He thinks he can come back whenever. I already told him I want nothing more to do with him. What is wrong with this man's head. No I don't want to go through same crap again. He hasn't changed at all. I have came to far with my healing to let him or anyone near me right now. Thank you this reading was meant for me.
Saved to watch this every time I feel the urge to break NC. Thank you!
Timing was perfect to hear this. Thank you.
This is, hands down, the best No Contact Strength video on UA-cam! The timing on this video was pure perfection. I needed this so much!
Glad it was helpful!
Me too.
Thanks for this one Rory. The last part gave me an adrenaline rush, which for me means i am on the right fucking path. Appreciate you, man!
Thanks. This came at a perfect time for me. I’ve been struggling the last couple of weeks with feelings of doubt and anxiety. I know better than to reach out, but your message today is really resonating and providing some much needed reassurance. Thanks Rory!
Damn .. thankyou very much for this video. I was feeling so emotional and irrational. And I don't feel like bothering anyone anymore with my break up blues. And this was JUST what I needed to hear. I suddenly see everything so clear now. Thankyou for your genius calming advice & keeping us sane!!
that is damn right Rory, i respect you for doing this :]] there are so many people who needs this type of reminders. I got out of that thing but still listening to your work, cause it helps to maintain yourself ! And i like your style :]]
I wasn't going to break it, but it was nice to hear you once again Rory.
Finally, I can say that I don't care anymore about what was, or what will be, and that I am at peace with myself. All anxiety and sadness is gone thanks to complete no contact. I Haven't figured everything out yet after a year and a half, but I'm getting there.
You and DG were my lifeline so many times. Stay safe.
Very well said my friend. I deserve better. I'm done with this no contact bs. I am moving on now.
It’s the last part for me! I needed to hear this🙌🏾
You helped pass through the hard dark times after my ex dumped me two years ago! two years passed by and now I
met a lovely girl (back to the dating game that I swore I d never touch again :) ) and here I m back again to your channel. Thanks bro for the content that helps others. Keep it up
Im glad I came to this video before I did anything stupid. You my friend are good at what you do!
you couldn’t have posted this at a better time. thank you, you’re a literal saviour. you’ve helped me grow mentally this last month and you’ve changed my whole perspective on things. i wish you greatness & happiness in your own life.
man rory never misses!! this video kept me from texting her!
I swear to god Rory I needed this, it's like you read my mind!
If someone left you.... forget her/him, move on.... because you dont need person who choose to left you, among other versions she/he could choose...
so , you dont need back that person with experience of “ dumping you from their life”....
Respect yourself and dont forget .. there are 7.000.000.000 people on planet Earth....
And of course “... at the end, you dont need your ex, and you will be fine“.. Dating Guy 😊😊❤️
Great video LC 😊❤️
OMG STFU!
SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!
This relationship was supposed to be forever :-)
NOT EVERY SITUATION IS THE SAME!!!!!!!!!
AND ALSO!
HE NEVER LEFT, OKAY?!!!
THAT GUY WAS ALWAYS AFRAID TO LOSE ME!!!!!
AND I'M THE ONE WHO LEFT, SO YEA...I'M NOT BLAMING HIM...
Aww well, baby the thing here is that he's different...Cause, he doesn't beg!
And you know what's more funny?
He can DEEPLY love me with all his heart, miss me like crazy, CRAVE me which he DOES!
He stalks me everyday to see on whom posts I comment ect...But, still he's never going to text first, beg or whatsoever!
Idk what's his problem lmao he doesn't wanna lose me, yet he doesn't talk to open up or say anything, I wish there was a different method for him :)
I’ts his birthday.. I’ve made it till 6:43 pm.. trying to hold on and finish off the day. had to come here to get my mind right again. I’ve been in no contact for the second time now for a good month..
My man Rory keeps dropping the mic!
This was so helpful. I was literally about to send a text and I'm so happy I listened. Thank you! I didn't send.
Been NC for 4 weeks now. I have my struggle moments, but this video is what motivates and fires me up to keep going. Thank you Rory, I don't know how I'd get through this without you
You got this, Chris!
Damn … you brought up so many points I hadn’t even thought of. Thank you once again for pointing out things that I overlooked.
Extremely well thought out talk!! Thank you so much!!
Thank you 🙏 I just found out that she resigned from where we both work. I wanted to reach out to her so badly but I knew I’d regret it. Thanks to your video I won’t be. Hard though it is. Stay strong fellow dumpees ♥️
The truth agian Rory,well said. Why would you chase or break no contact will your ex. No thanks,yes we do deserve better!
I just want to thank you for making these videos. Even though i am back with my ex, I still listen to everything and use it to keep working on myself, and not falling back into what made him break up with me in the first place. We communicate a lot better and talk a lot about these videos, and it has helped us both.
Wonderful!
For how long you went to NC?
Update?
update
How did you do it?
Always insightful and fits the situation! Thank you!
You are a mind reader my man.
Arguably the best video you made
Bless you Rory! Amazing work and advice as always
Absolutely, Rory. You are a 🌟!
You've saved me Rory. Thank you.
Thank you! I need this. It’s sobering and great advice!
One of best videos EVER! Thank you ❤️
Incredible how you put out these videos at JUST the right time. Thank you beyond words
I said the same thing. It’s like some sort of divine timing.
@@tc8719 Really blows my mind!! hes talked me off a ledge last second so many times!
Hannah Cobarrubia I’m grateful to finally be past that point of having so much anxiety, I act irrationally.
I don’t want to pry, but would you mind sharing your situation? How fresh is your breakup? I’ll go first. ;) I was in an amazing LDR for 12 months. Just a few states away. Ex broke up with me February, three days before Valentine’s day, just prior to the lockdown. I was devastated and out of my mind for a few months. I’m finally in a place where I know I don’t need my ex, and on the verge of not caring if she comes back. Ever since (and prior to) us splitting up ’ve been focused on self care and improvement; mentally, physically, and spiritually. I’ve realized that only I hold the key to my happiness.
Thank You Rory..
Much love from the Philippines 🇵🇭
Oh i love you. Just what I needed.
Damn Rory another great vid. We talked in June seems like many moons to go. I will be lying if I said I am totally over it but I'm moving on and and re discovering myself. Its been 5 months since the break up but I can tell you I am slowly getting to a better place, Like you said if she would like to reach out she knows how. Keep it going Rory
I needed this so much!
Thank you for this Rory. I got dumped the day after our 5 year anniversary, it’s been almost 4 months. I went a month without contact then she texted me about a mutual pet passing away and we haven’t talked since. I still miss her and probably think about her a few times a day. While in no contact I’ve worked on myself and it’s what’s has kept me sane. Your videos have helped me a lot and today for whatever reason was an extremely tough day. My anxiety was high and this Video helped calm me down and refocus my energy back to ME. People I know it’s hard and I’m sure I’m not fully healed yet but trust the process and try to enjoy it. Trust people like Rory and others, don’t fall for the gimmicky shit. If they want you they will come back and if they don’t then that’s fine. Either way the most important thing is that YOU come back. Love yourself and love the people who still support you. Peace out and thank you again Rory!
How ya holding up Noah?
Wow! 💥 I just found this channel today and this really resonates with me. Solid work and I’ll be digging in more. I’ve been checking out other breakup or no contact coaches (3 total) and they all seem to have an ulterior motive of wanting to sell you a kit or something. This is solid, logical advice. Much appreciated sir!
Welcome to the channel!! Glad to help!
Thank you Rory , i watched all your videos, your video and again and again ,you video is for after accepted break up before I won’t even listen one single word of you
72 days break up I’m still on the roller coaster 🎢
..also a lot from Susan winter ,coach lee , the art of love ..
I like to go sleep with your video it’s calm me down and healing , encouragement about self developing
Not me! But im here to listen anyways!
Ever since I walked away from my ex,I maintained no contact for 9 months. Therapy helps and moving on supports that. I got a new gf now who is wayyyyy better. Love yourself and don't blame yourself for the unfufillness or decision of another person. Let them go and focus on yourself. Fix your flaws and improve and change behaviors that are no good for you. Let go of people who don't want to be in your life. Love yourself. Be the best version for you!!
i'm very relate i needed this. my ex broke me up because of someone else and then i blaming myself because honestly i'm being neglected but i'm asking myself, do i deserved this person who betrayed me with his neighbor girl, while we still in LDR i don't think so. you open up my eyes it came up to my mind that i need to stop blaming myself for the another person who not being unfaithful towards me and let me down when i needed him the most.
@@heartmendoza3361 you don't need him. You need you. Love and respect yourself.
He is a coward who gaslight, lied, and disrespected you. Thats all you should keep in mind. Leaving someone for someone else is extremely disrespectful and a red flag. Youre a beautiful woman and you'll eventually find someone way better than your ex. Stay strong.
I am such a fan!!
I’m 3 months in. Lots of ups and downs . However without Rory id be a train wreck ! Get his E book guys , it’s so good and has helped my passions like my podcast :)
Excellent video mate!!
4 almost 5 months no contact 😔 long distance relationship recently because he moved away for school. This video helps my cravings
I’m with u there, ldr here too. Was with her for almost 3 years and it’s been so hard. Last time I reached out was 2 months ago and with Christmas coming up it’s so hard. I hope u here from him in time but be strong either way.
I am worry about him as i am watching the news about his country's covid 19 cases have gone wildly. That is why i am here to listen to you.
Love this dude
Yes, Rory! Yes! 👏🏾
Day 289 of No Contact: I am a way better person than I was when I was with her. I built a lot of muscle, started dating, and continued focusing on self improvement and there's still a couple more things I wanna improve on but from time to time it hurts and I do want her back still. When that happens I wonder if there's something wrong with me, I'm so much better now but why does she still linger in my mind. Don't worry though I have no plans to break NC, but I do wish she would.
I’m deployed and we were going to get married when I got back. It’s been hard for me but I’ve been trying to focus on my deployment and college classes I’m taking out here. I wanted to break NC but I’m glad I heard this first. I needed to hear this.
That ending. 💪
Thank you. I needed to hear this.
Rory you are a hero
It’s been 7 months. I’m so close to breaking n c. In my head it all
Works out. Reality is it’ll probs just set me back to square 1 of healing.
I got left for another guy last month but damn life’s a little annoying because it’s the little things that pop up. Drank the other day,, and drunk me decided to check my exes FB(dumb I know) and saw that they were in the country that the bottle was from. And a couple days ago I was approached by a girl at my job, and of course she had the EXACT first and last name as my ex. Regardless, I am working on myself, working out, school and work but it’s when I’m alone that my anxiety starts to go up. I know I’m not going to break no contact, but damn does it cross my mind. I think I’m just lonely tbh. Anyways, I’m kinda rambling but thank you for the videos Rory! They help a lot!
Rorey you are the straight up truth I hung in there 67 days no contact she reached out and said she misses me thanks brother!!
You got this
Rorey She reached out only to try to friend zone me again do I just go straight back in to no contact?
I made so many mistakes you can imagine and honestly after 5 years they came back. As Rory tells the straight up truth both individuals need to work on each other, She dumped me again but it didn’t matter as the relationship was doomed as we both returned to same behaviour, honestly she reached 3 times and I rejected it because it would be the same
I was here few days ago, but now i am all into regaining myself back before gaining her back
Thank you Rory! I do deserve better.
Yes you do
Ur absolutely right once again Rory no matter how much i know I'm worth and deserve more the very least. Is a damm text just acknowledging I existand yet I miss the woman like crazy and want to talk to her even thou she knows 100% how I feel my heart still says to let her know and my head says stay the f how u are, if its meant to be and she does feel what shes telling u then she must make that move first..... I hate this, the past 14mth have been great and both madly in love.... Her parents and my past mistakes (before there daughter) are what's caused the split bcuz its so much out the blue that 3 days before the split we were still talking of our marriage...hurting so much atm
I always watch your videos. Coz its inspired me a lot and give me the strength even if it's very hard...
Thank you for this video. I just wish I had seen it before I made contact. Now all I have to do is begin no contact again…to re-establish my worth.
You got this!
Before I go to bed I listen to your video rory you are a great dating coach. I am so grateful I found your chanel it helps me alot thank you 😘
Update: I met someone we dated over a year and he broke up with me 😢 so im here again
Thanks this talked me out of breaking no contact. I was about to in a few days after 6 months strong.
Hi mate
Thanks so much for your videos & pod casts they have saved me so far.
I’m two weeks into no contact.
I blocked my ex a few days ago when I was advised she’s in a rebound, (3 weeks post 8 yr breakup & 2 weeks into no contact).
I blocked her because I was absolutely gutted and devastated and impulsively blocked her because it felt like the only thing to do.
I’ve sat on it for a few days and In line with my journey to self discovery and improvement I’ve reflected and decided to unblock to help myself, a mental decision to face reality, accept it and process it so I can continue to heal.
However, after unblocking I now see she has blocked me! Obviously in direct response to my blocking her.
Now I’m stuck.
I really want her to unblock me because it just doesn’t have to be like this between us, I’m desperate to message and tell her why I initially blocked her and that I’ve now unblocked her.
What do you suggest is the best course of action mate.
Would really appreciate some guidance.
Thankyou
Dan
I was the one who left him after he was being disrespectful and insensitive. On my way out he told me never to come back. I'm happy with that. At this moment in time I'm content in doing my own thing and self living, and even though I get moments of panic where I think we're done I fetch myself around to what I want more than him, and that's my life. Me. 🍒
Honestly, this is the best video I've ever watched regarding this topic, I'm beyond grateful for having found your channel. Also, your voice is hot. :)
Glad it was helpful! And thank you!
I do love this!
I was sitting here thinking half way through, why the f- am I listening to this! I came to the conclusion it must be your dulcet tones!
Fuck, I wished I heard this earlier…overthought and thought that my ex gf was dating and I broke NC by telling her “Hey, genuinely happy that you found a new guy, blessed to hear that you’re happier!”
Thank You!!!!!💕
It's been over a month and I'm still feeling th loss. My anxiety is down so much and I've thought about reaching out. Not going to though. I didn't do really much begging and pleading it was on the day of the breakup after her last message I said nothing. She did it over text. I knew instinctively I had to leave her alone and not message back. I had to respect her wish. I may not have told her but I feel it was best cause she had built alot of resentment towards me and barely spoke to me the last few weeks and did a slow fade. My sister talked to her and she's blaming me for everything. It's fine. I've accepted my part I hope she accepts her part. I'm trying to make the changes to myself, gym, journaling, quit smoking cigarettes, working on communication skills. I know she still has feelings for me. She's not coming back. I NEED TO MOVE ON!!
Similar to my story... Still stings for me. Got to respect myself. My ex is emotionally unavailable. I said this to her Cuz her own 2 daughters won’t speak to her. She hides the pain of this. I brought the subject up, suddenly I was dumped, via text
I'm new to your channel, you give good advice thanks..
Dam u said it perfect bro , thank you
That was awesome.
Honestly when I look back at our relationship I think I in a way made alot of his decision for him. I remember 4 months of or 6 he apologized for not yet being my boyfriend or even asking me out yet. Reflecting now I made all our dates. I'm gay so it never occurred to me that he wasn't talking the lead but I think that's actually important to him. If he comes back he's gotta do it himself
Thank you so much for this video
You are so welcome!
Listen to Rory... Respect yourself.
Can you make a video of people pushing others away, and the partner had to leave for self respect ? Also the steps on what to do if keep receiving breadcrumbs in this situation ?