Just wanted to say thanks for sticking around, I know being gone for long periods like this isn't the best for the channel but condemned is a game I've loved for years and wanted to share my appreciation for it I'll probably end up making "a good video about" a series on game reviews in the future, trying to bring back more old series and introduce new ones. Next video should be an ASOT, and thanks again for the support bros
After two years I just realized that the enemies in the library are victims of the fire that rosa talks about. In the first call with her she tells you that there was a big fire there explaining why some of the people inside looking really disfigured and burned.
@@BigPuddin I think it would be due to the fact the that people are going insane in the city. Similarly to the guys that crawl around in the subway section of the game. They have no reason to crawl but they just do.
@@jonunomac4931 Yeah. It's just trying to play on human fears of the aberrant while still being grounded in a believable universe. Doesn't work. It would for Silent Hill, but it just doesn't make sense here. "Oh, they're crazy so they arbitrarily crawl" because crazy people wouldn't just run at you as you'd expect of a form of locomotion endemic to our species for well over a million years. It's like having them cartwheel at you.
Maybe it's just me, but I kinda like it. Thomas is a Fed, through and through. Always keeping his cool and giving his reassuring speeches, no matter how grisly the injuries.
Its incredible how amazing these reviews are, covering everything about the game in such a detailed way and being entertaining as well. They last a full hour, yet they feel like a 20 minute video. Amazing stuff right fucking here.
It's hard to believe.. these days, that you were ever called a "leafy clone". Your content, especially like THIS is fantastically edited, informative, and wholly entertaining. I also love that you really enjoy making it. Keep it up bud.
Emmy G if you don't understand why he was called a leafy clone, go back and watch their vids from 2016. It basically mirrored each other from the topic to the jokes. The only difference was that pyro had editing while leafy had "jokes"
bob bobinson no I remember, haha I'm 24, that's what I'm saying. Pyros content has improved so much to where it's **hard to believe** that was ever the case, is all
Wow, Pyro, what an amazing video. Definitely worth the wait. But I'm sorry to inform you that you misspelled "robux" as "robucks" at 4:07. I will be leaving a dislike and unsubbing until you think about your mistakes and apologize publicly on Twitter and UA-cam. Thank you.
An hour into the game, I remember turning to my friend and asking "How certain are we that I'm not actually the serial killer?" At the end of the game, he answered "Hundred percent. You just rampaged through the city murdering EMTs and homeless people, convinced you were solving a crime by collecting dead birds off the street. The fuck do you call that?"
this comment is so confusing, because either for it to be correct, your friend needs to answer 0 percent or you need to say "how certain are we that I AM the serial killer" otherwise it just hurts my fuckking brain
*corpse's head turns 112 degrees and bleeds from the eyes. The screams of the damned surround you and centipedes tunnel just beneath their skin. Deep holes in their scalp are packed tightly with fat, squeezed mango fly larva* "Don't worry my good sir! Help is on the way! Who did this to you?"
It wouldn't have matched the tone. A happy-sounding big band to violence would fit in better with something more over-the-top, like Saints Row or something like that. Not a good tone for a horror game, especially not one like Condemned
It fits the setting of a world falling apart, collapsing, society ceasing to exist, it would be a really cool thing to add in something like say, Bioshock.
Three ways to improve the taser 1. Add durability to it 2. The more you use it, the longer the cooldown and shorter stuns 3. Instead of a supertaser, just give another one with full durability and reset cooldown with normal stuns
nah better idea , you get only 3 charges for it until you meet rosa who give you 3 charges again , you make the Tazer into a last resort weapon if you are trully fucked
Or Use Batteries that you need to find through the stages You only have 2 shots at the start and batteries had a chance of having mostly 1 charge and rare chance of having 2
I think these videos are really great, videos like the worst song ever are funny and memorable but these videos despite the mass amount of editing and effort, they are worth it. they stay in my memory for a long time. The petscop video was amazing, and the cuphead review was too, and this one is as well. This mix of personal enjoyment and personality along with jokes and comedy is great. I love this channel, and the direction it's going. I don't expect for these videos to show up more due to its extremely difficult process of making them. But to have some from time to time like it is now would be great. Keep it up pyro.
no he won't, people who vomit "meh" videos are the "best" "channels" pyro to me is a amazing artist that went under apreciated by another guy who drew the suicide forest
1:00:03 Ending Change Proposal : If you shoot SKX, Thomas will puke into the sink and the same jumpscare will happen. But if you spare SKX, Thomas will instead wash his face in the bathroom instead of puke and the jumpscare buildup will be the same but the difference being Thomas instead finishes washing his face. Give a determined look to himself in the mirror and walk away.
I honestly really like these kinds of videos from you. The way you talk about the game in a truthful light without sacrificing the sporadic wtf nature of your normal videos is really nice and refreshing out of reviews of games. You managed to get me interested in a game that I had almost no idea even existed. I would really love to see more of these videos from you even if they don't get as many views or they don't get you as much money, even if that is a bit much to ask of a creator.
I know commenting on an old video is pointless but this is my 4th or 5th time watching this video, there’s a reason why I’m drawn back to watching this video, the petscop video and the cuphead video, and that’s because the quality shows, you took time making this and put in effort and all of that makes for a video that is damn near perfect
48:39 They look burned... And they're in a library... My mind went straight to the Library of Alexandria... I believe they're just burn victims that went crazy, really.
@@JeanMarceaux Yeah, Lisa - we'll be back to you in a brief moment. The police has found a letter the Metro City Rampage suspect had most likely left behind. "Instructions unclear, had sv_cheats enabled i can't get the kill 1000 people achievement sorry man see you tomorrow". With that out of the way, we'll return to our local news broadcast.
The thing is, the fungus is a fungus so it grows better on umid places and water. So by using the magic poo water that is not magical btw it is just water, like literally the healing comes from the fungus, so yeah it makes sense he reattaching the tbings and shit, the automatic response from the lost parts is dumb tho.
A brilliant idea for a game you should cover is the Metro series. Metro 2033, Metro Last Light, and Metro Exodus. The first two are great atmospheric games while the third one expanded itself in new areas to some mixed results. The first two seem right-up your alley and fit the general look and feel of games you've reviewed in the past like Lost in Vivo and the one recently released: Cry of Fear. The overwhelming sense of dread that comes from the environment. Knowing that life on the planet is grim and the fate of the Planet even more so. There is a good balancing act between Ammo and money. As Ammo is no abundant. But if needed. You are able to use your money for Ammo. Dealing lots more damage. But are literally shooting your ammo away. While mutants tend to get a bit repetitive. They are less of the focus, where the human enemies are. Ironically, in a world filled with horribly mutated monsters. The humans are your biggest worry.
i totally agree the combat and environments are great, and the amount of weapons is super fun too, though i felt the 2nd one a bit more lacking then the first it still had some cool areas like the church
35:00 Honestly can you imagine a game that starts as a shooter with thriller elements and when they present you with choices it changes not only the "ending" but the game as well. The more merciless your decisions are the more the game looks less like a thriller and more like cod. Saturation is bumped up, music is more epic and exciting. And then. In the final fight, they play flight of the fireflies and you fight against the final boss and the last victory cut scene is you realising the opposition are the good guys. You became the villain. And the visuals, bgm, sfx all return to the cold harsh original version and most of the people you killed in the last half were good. In contrast if you were more merciful the bleak atmosphere stays but you see the aspirations of people in the way. not everyone is faceless anymore. and the ending is bittersweet maybe. Idk
@@coralinereeves9629 spec ops afaik leads to the tragic white phosphorus moment always right? i was thinking more like msg2 (i think?) with the ghost mission, but exaggerated to its extreme
"Two magazines on back up... Two magazines on back up. Two magazines on back up. Two magazines on back up! Two magazines on back up!!!" *PTSD Intensifies*
4:11 Funny, originally, Yu-Gi-Oh! was planned to be a horror manga before its shift to card games. I wish they would have kept their original tone, though. But then again, it probably wouldn't have been more popular now than today. Perhaps Studio Gallop would directly adapt the manga into a full anime series one day. I think I'm getting off-topic here.
@@monkaWGiga or that time yugi burned someone alive, or that time yugi made a bully allucinate by making him see everything around him as money for the rest of his life, or im the sequel when Marik makes Pandora's suicidal urges rise up again and said pandora would kill himself when the duel was over, or when...
I honestly loved this video, not only because you've been gone for some time but because everytime you put that much effort into a video it becomes a masterpiece, being a great combination of criticism and humor. I also got a lot of that nostalgic feeling when you showed footage of that King Kong game at 15:40 . So accurate. Also... GREATO JOJOKE!!!!! 23:40
Aaaaaay, dude this is fucking great! This game seriously doesn't get enough love, and I can't even fathom how much work this must have took. It's great to see you branch out and make something you're passionate about. Really solid, would love to see more like this!!
I feel like you need to play metro if you haven't yet. It follows a lot of these tenets, from the lack of cheap jumpscares to the dread of only having a single bullet in the chamber.
I would love to see a modern day Condemned game. Maybe a spinoff of the original, but similar mechanics. One of the best "early" horror survival games there was. There was problems, but the atmosphere was great. Almost like Outlast, but you could fight back, with more enemies. This game was great, sucks I only remember it when I get recommended videos about it on the VERY long occasion.
@@What-go8ng I wouldn't say that lol it's not THAT bad. I mean definitely not as good as the first game but Condemned 2 has some solid refinements to the fighting mechanics the story is just a lil' dooky is all.
True, but to be fair, "what's in the box!?" is one of the most iconic movie lines of all time. People will quote it and even know the context without having seen Se7en, knowing that it's from Se7en, or even knowing what Se7en is at all. Lol
outstanding video as always, your channel has just improved leagues since I subscribed 2 years ago, glad to be a supporter and I hope you grow even more producing content like this 10/10 bro
holy shit the "wake up Mr. Freeman" that G-Man says at 21:10 was perfectly timed with Far Cry 2's opening screen appearing. Greatest crossover in history.
I really enjoy game reviews like these, not only you give the games a fair an unbiased review, you add some comedy to it and makes it hilarious to watch! I hope to see more reviews like these soon, love your videos!
Yeah, they fit "lore wise," but they're a departure from the tone of the game and end up being "generic horror monster #2331" instead of one of the very real, tangible enemies in the game that wouldn't be too far fetched for the setting. Monolith went over the top when they shouldn't have. They added stupid hallucinatory filters over the screen to destroy any ambiguity as to whether what you were seeing was indeed real by affirming that said hallucination was a hallucination with "LOOK!! LOOK AT OUR FILTERS!!" They added too many stupid, fantastical enemies that couldn't possibly exist in this world setting, sequel retcon or no. It should have been a very real, tense game based on tangible, legitimate fears of things like crazy junkies and hobos beating you death in abandoned buildings. But like an eight year old drinking too many Monsters, they went fucking apeshit instead and made some parts of the game a generic slog with tons of mid 2000's tropes that been beaten to death in the industry. The sequel, while it definitely wasn't bad overall story notwithstanding, suffered even moreso from this problem. Now the crazy hobo rioters are wearing animal masks, and you have to fight a crazy clown bitch wielding a circular saw polearm painted like a giant lollipop. These aren't inherently bad ideas for certain types of games, but why the fuck would you disrupt the realistic, mature tone of Condemned that was absolutely brilliant with a bunch of silly shit like emaciated schoolboys crawling around on all fours and a disfigured, obese lunchlady wielding a butcher knife? It's just fucking silly and over the top, and it doesn't match the rest of the game's tone. That's more of what I gathered from Pyro's assessment than anything. And I actually disagree with him about the subway tunnel rat people "fitting" the universe. They're fucking stupid, too. That kind of shit would've been okay for something like any of the umpteen million "horror themed" over-the-top shooters produced in mid-to-late 2000's (i.e. F.E.A.R., The Suffering, etc.) but why sully the believable tone of this game with that? If you just want to go apeshit, then go full apeshit. But they didn't do that. The devs showed some restraint, which leads me to believe that they weren't all on board with the idea of the game being a tense "hobo/junkie survival simulator" and tossed in a bunch of crazy shit later to draw in more of the teen boy market.
Well, I really enjoyed your video, and I can see some improvements over your other videos. I can't even imagine how much effort you have put into this video. However, I think there are some points on the video were you repeat yourself a little bit, and the "flow" of the review wasn't the best. However, I would really like to see more game reviews like this one (maybe decrease the length a little bit), keep up the good work pyro,
I like how the whole narrative is that Ethan is framed for the deaths of those cops, but its clearly shown that SKX had his fingerprints on the gun and they don't think to investigate the second set of fingerprints? It could be argued that "Maybe SKX wiped the gun" but what about the fact that Ethan was thrown out of a window from three stories high. Maybe they thought murder-suicide, if so why didn't Ethan off himself at any of the opportunities he had going home? Most of the evidence points away from Ethan being the killer and the whole narrative is a semi truck balanced on toothpicks.
As a games art and design student, I love these game reviews you do, because it's so insightful into how a real gamer experiences the game as opposed to someone who made it would experience it. Designing games makes you have more respect for how much work goes into making it, but also can make you blind or more forgiving to some of the faults that stop the game from being perfect. Thank you for helping out the next generation of game makers; these reviews are always so thoroughly done, you can expect a future with even better games. :)
30:30 Can we appreciate how real that early morning vibe is? Shit's all grey and blurry when he gets up, goes for the light hoping it will improve things... It just makes everyone's eyes hurt and things harder to see.
Just wanted to say thanks for sticking around, I know being gone for long periods like this isn't the best for the channel but condemned is a game I've loved for years and wanted to share my appreciation for it
I'll probably end up making "a good video about" a series on game reviews in the future, trying to bring back more old series and introduce new ones. Next video should be an ASOT, and thanks again for the support bros
Pyrocynical np dad
ur mama gay
ur gay
my name jeff
Pyrocynical where the fuck is black mesa
why killer kill?
Albino eye llama
ALBINOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Albino is the blackest Jew of them all for not uploading
Car broke my flashlight
why killer not come to us???
"I won't rest until all the homeless in this city are obliterated by my hand."
Wow what did Ethan mean by that?
MandaloreGaming I'm happy to find you here. Your reviews pretty great
Mandaloreeeeeeeeeeeeeee I love your content my dude
MandaloreGaming those pecking loiterers are ruining this great city of ours
Your reviews are great :)
MandaloreGaming get out of here you turbo nerd XD lol. Go read a book or play some d&d am i right boys up top.
After two years I just realized that the enemies in the library are victims of the fire that rosa talks about. In the first call with her she tells you that there was a big fire there explaining why some of the people inside looking really disfigured and burned.
Did the fire also fry their frontal lobes turning them into quadroped troglodytes that behave like generic horror assets ripped from The Suffering?
@@BigPuddin It gets revealed in the plot.
@@camblongkaras7121 I played both games. The answer is still stupid.
@@BigPuddin I think it would be due to the fact the that people are going insane in the city. Similarly to the guys that crawl around in the subway section of the game. They have no reason to crawl but they just do.
@@jonunomac4931 Yeah. It's just trying to play on human fears of the aberrant while still being grounded in a believable universe. Doesn't work. It would for Silent Hill, but it just doesn't make sense here. "Oh, they're crazy so they arbitrarily crawl" because crazy people wouldn't just run at you as you'd expect of a form of locomotion endemic to our species for well over a million years. It's like having them cartwheel at you.
I've not fed my kids since you last uploaded in protest, i hope you're happy, i sure am
Glad your kids starved
Your kids sure are too
Your kids are lucky
rip children
i haven’t fed my kids either ones dead.
You’ll be sad to hear that Townsville is a real place in Australia
Is it on fire ?
Clarence Tuurngait I don’t live there
@@clarencetuurngait7628 Knowing Australia, it prolly is. :p
@@paraplonk7269 no, it's just a shithole
Yep I was born and raised there. Biggest shithole.
Isnt metro city the place where megamind lives?
Idiots Inc yes sir, yes it is
It's pronounced metrocity
its all clear now
Kurt Haywood yeah its metro city but
metrocity
Oh so this the ending where evil incel guy takes over
*gets grabbed by a mangled half dead man covered in blood and missing most of his face*
“Help me... H-help me...”
Thomas: “Help is on the way 🙂”
And the help didn’t arrive. :)
@@TheKidsAreSOnotOkay did you assassinated the helpers
@@haleloop963cortex4
Well.....
@@TheKidsAreSOnotOkay I'll take it as a yes
Maybe it's just me, but I kinda like it. Thomas is a Fed, through and through. Always keeping his cool and giving his reassuring speeches, no matter how grisly the injuries.
Its incredible how amazing these reviews are, covering everything about the game in such a detailed way and being entertaining as well. They last a full hour, yet they feel like a 20 minute video. Amazing stuff right fucking here.
are you trying to make it into one of his comment videos
BornaE hentaihaven.org But it takes like 2 centuries to load a second of the video
This essay deserves a 5😏
Nice Zeke
Alexander Baldwin thanks lol
pyrocynical
hi sive
pyrocynical
Sive
Don’t steal my top comment from me.
sive
Never knew megamind had a spinoff game in metrocity
The real question is where is megamind
New megamind remake is lookin kinda edgy ngl
I actually read that the way Megamind pronounces it
669 likes. Nice
I think it's Metro-city
55:11 I'm now convinced that every person named ‘Ethan’ always loses a finger.
I just got the joke, that's a nice one bro, good job, no homo
*looks at brother*
Ethan winters hands really went through a lot
*Heavy rain intensifies*
Ethan mars is the only one to feel excruciating pain from losing a finger
It's hard to believe.. these days, that you were ever called a "leafy clone". Your content, especially like THIS is fantastically edited, informative, and wholly entertaining. I also love that you really enjoy making it. Keep it up bud.
Emmy G if you don't understand why he was called a leafy clone, go back and watch their vids from 2016. It basically mirrored each other from the topic to the jokes. The only difference was that pyro had editing while leafy had "jokes"
bob bobinson no I remember, haha I'm 24, that's what I'm saying. Pyros content has improved so much to where it's **hard to believe** that was ever the case, is all
Hoodie SO yeah I agree! He's come so far that it's hard to believe that he was ever on that level is my point :)
I agree! He has come so far. Proud of the lad.
Are you Danny G's sister?
Wow, Pyro, what an amazing video. Definitely worth the wait. But I'm sorry to inform you that you misspelled "robux" as "robucks" at 4:07. I will be leaving a dislike and unsubbing until you think about your mistakes and apologize publicly on Twitter and UA-cam. Thank you.
Well here you are I found you again
FebreezyXD I know, Pyrocynical has crossed the line. Extremely disrespectful.
*TRIGGERED* 😂😂😂
you forgott the reupload
lol
I just don't get why everyone is so concerned with one serial killer, when the whole city is undergoing the early stages of a zombie Apocalypse.
Caesar StrunDova Exactly lol, I just played through the game and was wondering this the whole time.
Because later on in the 2nd one SKX becomes obsessed with the Oro (cult) and kills everyone to find out how it works.
OrdinaryGume oh it’s Doland too btw
@@Strangelov-e that's also Doland too btw
OrdinaryGume Yeah, it is Doland.
An hour into the game, I remember turning to my friend and asking "How certain are we that I'm not actually the serial killer?" At the end of the game, he answered "Hundred percent. You just rampaged through the city murdering EMTs and homeless people, convinced you were solving a crime by collecting dead birds off the street. The fuck do you call that?"
What do we call that? Children this is what we call a PRO GAMER /j
this comment is so confusing, because either for it to be correct, your friend needs to answer 0 percent or you need to say "how certain are we that I AM the serial killer" otherwise it just hurts my fuckking brain
@St. Haborym i know its a joke its just phrased weird thats all i was saying
Necessary
Sounds more fitting for spec ops:the line
*corpse's head turns 112 degrees and bleeds from the eyes. The screams of the damned surround you and centipedes tunnel just beneath their skin. Deep holes in their scalp are packed tightly with fat, squeezed mango fly larva*
"Don't worry my good sir! Help is on the way! Who did this to you?"
Corpse: what a fuckin' brainlet
Ryuzaki Wolf lmao
Corpse: WTF Is Wrong With You I Am Corpse That Supposed To Scare You.Did You Drink A Rum Or Something?
I feel like that scene with the Mario Odyssey music could have actually been a really cool trailer for the game.
It wouldn't have matched the tone. A happy-sounding big band to violence would fit in better with something more over-the-top, like Saints Row or something like that. Not a good tone for a horror game, especially not one like Condemned
@@Weldedhodag saints row the third hands down best game
Also it fit with it and it was at exactly 35:00
Omfg, yaaasss
It fits the setting of a world falling apart, collapsing, society ceasing to exist, it would be a really cool thing to add in something like say, Bioshock.
return of the king
ImAllexx u FUCKING goblin
Y E S
ImAllexx happy birthday dad
WhO tHe FUCk Are YoU.
Are you Alex?
Three ways to improve the taser
1. Add durability to it
2. The more you use it, the longer the cooldown and shorter stuns
3. Instead of a supertaser, just give another one with full durability and reset cooldown with normal stuns
nah better idea , you get only 3 charges for it until you meet rosa who give you 3 charges again , you make the Tazer into a last resort weapon if you are trully fucked
Real tasers have something like a 40 percent failure rate, so make it so that there's a good chance that a taser just fails nearly half the time.
I would have just liked if it had a certain amount of battery or shots per level. Maybe it could have batteries you could find for it or something.
Or Use Batteries that you need to find through the stages
You only have 2 shots at the start and batteries had a chance of having mostly 1 charge and rare chance of having 2
@@HansWilker A similar fix was actually implemented in Condemned 2
34:55 "Modern video game music would ruin this game" *plays Mario music* I think you meant to say "enhance".
can you tell the music name ?
It's Super Mario Odyssey's main theme.
thank you
@Not_Sh1v3r thank man
to be honest, I find it to be one of the most annoying songs ever
I think these videos are really great, videos like the worst song ever are funny and memorable but these videos despite the mass amount of editing and effort, they are worth it. they stay in my memory for a long time. The petscop video was amazing, and the cuphead review was too, and this one is as well. This mix of personal enjoyment and personality along with jokes and comedy is great. I love this channel, and the direction it's going. I don't expect for these videos to show up more due to its extremely difficult process of making them. But to have some from time to time like it is now would be great. Keep it up pyro.
Ooga Booga B
Honestly the editing was good but imo pyro tried to hard to be funny. Every 2 minutes he put a meme that often detracted from his topic.
Tim true but I still loved it
Ooga Booga B I agree
I liked this one but it definitely wad a step down. Too many memes, explaining the ENTIRE game, and it seems generally unfocused
Tim
That's the point. It's to detract from the video. Comic relief. It was a bit too frequent though, but I like the humor.
Two magazines on backup
Two magazines on backup
TWO MAGAZINES ON BACKUP
*TWO MAGAZINES ON BACKUP*
pukcab no senizagam owt
-two magazines on backup-
King kong was an amazing but really short game it was basically what a Jurassic park game should be.
This made me relive that entire game all over again
@@cursedgaraged5801 what's the name of the game? i've been wanted to look at that game again. (i haven't played it for about a decade)
I can't believe this came out 2 years ago I remember clicking on this when it first came out
3 years now
@@koopakoo3813 you beat me to it lol
Same
@@joemamma6013 same
The fuck, time passes
If you keep making these long form reviews, you'll be the best channel on youtube! Great job!
Salokin hi man didnt expect to see you here
Im always here man! Hi
Salokin i liked you in GGGmans video
no he won't, people who vomit "meh" videos are the "best" "channels" pyro to me is a amazing artist that went under apreciated by another guy who drew the suicide forest
Unfortunately true
Didn't know they turned Minnesota into a game
*Louisiana
@@CHICKENNUGGETSKOON *Detroit
*Chicago
Monolith looked into the future and recreated CHAZ.
Apparently just all of America
Baby shark do do do do
Mommy shark do do do do do do
Truly the most fitting ad for a video about Condemned
Jusylee omg you got that one too?
I bet pyro put it there
I got that ad 4 times during this video
Every time I see it im not sure what to even think. True art.
cut to 1 week later when that add becomes a meme
Same here
Sometimes, I'll just rewatch this.
Same
I fell asleep and this sort of narrated my dream, so I just had a polish hitler in my dream for no reason.
That's honestly awesome.
How did you know he was polish?
sinha lmfao
Że co? Polskiego Hitlera?
And here I thought I had problems. XD
"Ethan also has pre-cognition, but we're getting ahead of ourselves." Nice Pryo.
I actually was listening to those exact words as reading this somehow 😭
58:06 but more importantly, Ethan has grown his finger back
Nice...
Lizard people!!!!!!!!!!
nope its bandages
@@ammyowl473 Ethan Thomas: the gecko man
Mister Thirteen exactly
1:00:03
Ending Change Proposal : If you shoot SKX, Thomas will puke into the sink and the same jumpscare will happen. But if you spare SKX, Thomas will instead wash his face in the bathroom instead of puke and the jumpscare buildup will be the same but the difference being Thomas instead finishes washing his face. Give a determined look to himself in the mirror and walk away.
Is this a.. a wipes tear from eye a quality video pyro
AutismAlert u mom gay
my name is jeff lol xD u moon gayer
MrPlays MrGames no u
i seriously hope that profile picture is sarcastic
Diddnt even realized how fucked up this was my brain put this together for me omegalul
I honestly really like these kinds of videos from you. The way you talk about the game in a truthful light without sacrificing the sporadic wtf nature of your normal videos is really nice and refreshing out of reviews of games. You managed to get me interested in a game that I had almost no idea even existed. I would really love to see more of these videos from you even if they don't get as many views or they don't get you as much money, even if that is a bit much to ask of a creator.
Horror is now actually living up to its name?!
*What witchcraft is this?!*
StickMaster500 you are fucking evrywhere
Ayy its thiccmaster500
you know anything about sin at the moment? haven't heard of him in a long time now
StickMaster500 i see ya everivier. What is DIS witchcraft?
AAAA YOU ARE EVERYWHERE THIS IS THE REAL HORROR SHIT
>mentions Monolith
>only shows 1997s BLOOD for 7 frames and no verbal mention at all
What? Pyrocinical is evolving! Congratulations! Your Pyrocincal evolved into an intelligent young man who researches his topics!
Agiranto Are you saying he never researched ?
Agiranto he is good memes he not fake news
Bedo Poi lizard race? Leafyishere?
Cruxuletz _ His content has improved enormously since the "craziest woman ever eats sand" or, god save us, "MLG Teletubbies" eras
*SARCASM INTENSIFIES*
I know commenting on an old video is pointless but this is my 4th or 5th time watching this video, there’s a reason why I’m drawn back to watching this video, the petscop video and the cuphead video, and that’s because the quality shows, you took time making this and put in effort and all of that makes for a video that is damn near perfect
i am here aswell after 3-4 times
I agree 100%! I’ve watched 3-4 times. I also love Condemned and Pyro makes great points about its strengths and flaws, plus the jokes are hilarious.
Same I’m rewatching them all and I love them so much kinda want pyro to just become a cool review channel like YMS
This is my 9-10th time watching
Same here fam
48:39
They look burned... And they're in a library...
My mind went straight to the Library of Alexandria...
I believe they're just burn victims that went crazy, really.
I was thinking the same. UA-cam got me recommened so late
Explain videogames badly: Police officer assaults drug addicts for being too scary
Just an accurate representation of police irl really
Ex-man of law tries to outvandal vandals; casualties ensue.
@@JeanMarceaux Yeah, Lisa - we'll be back to you in a brief moment. The police has found a letter the Metro City Rampage suspect had most likely left behind. "Instructions unclear, had sv_cheats enabled i can't get the kill 1000 people achievement sorry man see you tomorrow". With that out of the way, we'll return to our local news broadcast.
@@realCaveJohnson I had an embarrassing amount of confusion reading that
q
i see why you made us go back and watch this vid, its not demonetized!
Zonies Coasters lol clever
Smart
What? Guy's gotta eat
Ill spend my sparetime refreshing the ads
Feri Khoros
If only pyro sees your comment
This video was so horribly underrated
Dare i say, CRIMINALLY underrated.
my horse died
I really hate the fact that millions people know and love outlast, but don't know about this fucking great game.
it have 2.2m views, tf are you talking about it?
@@pauloricardo-wn6ps MLG Teletubbies has 14m.
Did.. did Ethan reattach his finger? What was the point of him losing his finger if he just slaps a bandage on it like "welp, all better!"
You know i thought about that 🤔 i miss that finger
Madness be like:
@@zamasuningen2064 lmao
When i saw this my mind went intsantly to ethan winters getting his fingers bit off
The thing is, the fungus is a fungus so it grows better on umid places and water. So by using the magic poo water that is not magical btw it is just water, like literally the healing comes from the fungus, so yeah it makes sense he reattaching the tbings and shit, the automatic response from the lost parts is dumb tho.
A brilliant idea for a game you should cover is the Metro series. Metro 2033, Metro Last Light, and Metro Exodus. The first two are great atmospheric games while the third one expanded itself in new areas to some mixed results. The first two seem right-up your alley and fit the general look and feel of games you've reviewed in the past like Lost in Vivo and the one recently released: Cry of Fear. The overwhelming sense of dread that comes from the environment. Knowing that life on the planet is grim and the fate of the Planet even more so. There is a good balancing act between Ammo and money. As Ammo is no abundant. But if needed. You are able to use your money for Ammo. Dealing lots more damage. But are literally shooting your ammo away. While mutants tend to get a bit repetitive. They are less of the focus, where the human enemies are. Ironically, in a world filled with horribly mutated monsters. The humans are your biggest worry.
Too much rape for big youtuber to cover he couldn't make many memes out of it
i totally agree the combat and environments are great, and the amount of weapons is super fun too, though i felt the 2nd one a bit more lacking then the first it still had some cool areas like the church
@@Penguin-1966 the 2nd is better tho
35:00
Honestly can you imagine a game that starts as a shooter with thriller elements and when they present you with choices it changes not only the "ending" but the game as well. The more merciless your decisions are the more the game looks less like a thriller and more like cod. Saturation is bumped up, music is more epic and exciting. And then. In the final fight, they play flight of the fireflies and you fight against the final boss and the last victory cut scene is you realising the opposition are the good guys. You became the villain. And the visuals, bgm, sfx all return to the cold harsh original version and most of the people you killed in the last half were good. In contrast if you were more merciful the bleak atmosphere stays but you see the aspirations of people in the way. not everyone is faceless anymore. and the ending is bittersweet maybe. Idk
hey
that's pretty good
Anyone know the name of the song?
@@klev7476 i think it's from mario odissey but i don't know the name
Spec ops?
@@coralinereeves9629 spec ops afaik leads to the tragic white phosphorus moment always right? i was thinking more like msg2 (i think?) with the ghost mission, but exaggerated to its extreme
*Starts as a review*
Nice i should play this
*spoils the whole game*
God damn it
Thanks for the warning, stopping the video right now.
*starts video*
"it's a 8/10"
*outro*
'1 minute'
You didn't do a melee only playthrough of the game, Mr. Cynical.
I'm going to politely ask that you hand in your pro gamer membership card.
Truth
No don’t take it
NOOO NOT THE PRO GAMER MEMBERSHIP CARD
“Do you love your wife if she had a slong size of godzilla?” - Now that some serious question right there
At that point we’re asking if liking Futanari is gay XD
@@Shiratto why question it when you like futa? Just enjoy your futa wife, smh
@@nota444tm2 Spittin facts over here.
Wouldn't that just make me love her more?
@@nota444tm2 No
7:09
Yeah, uhh... There really is a city named Townsville. Sorry lol.
- Australia
Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky IV Almost as lazy as the ~4 towns in US called Prague
Yer lucky, in canada there's three streets named and i quote 'this street,that street and the other street'
@@frosty925 Don't worry dude, In California there's also three streets named, "this-a-way, that-a-way and which-a-way"
So? He meant it was unoriginal as fuck, and it still is
"Smithy, Johnson, wait up!"
They really picked the most unrealistically accurate cop names imaginable...
Finished the video, was very interesting and enjoyable. I appreciate the amount of time and analysis you put into it :) great video pyro.
Also.. MEmeS
Emperor Oh, yes. ThE MemMes
29:46 - 30:00 that made me cry, here's the time to rewatch this hilarious part
"Two magazines on back up... Two magazines on back up. Two magazines on back up. Two magazines on back up! Two magazines on back up!!!"
*PTSD Intensifies*
Funny asf
Such a good ass game, awesome cheat codes too
4:11 Funny, originally, Yu-Gi-Oh! was planned to be a horror manga before its shift to card games. I wish they would have kept their original tone, though. But then again, it probably wouldn't have been more popular now than today. Perhaps Studio Gallop would directly adapt the manga into a full anime series one day. I think I'm getting off-topic here.
Man the Yu-Gi-Oh manga started off fucking dark. Like that time Mokuba just straight up tried to poison Yugi or the entire Death-T story.
I wish it wasnt yu gi oh was my life as a 5 year old
Didn't Pegasus get fucking murdered in the manga by a kid possessed by a serial killer?
@@monkaWGiga or that time yugi burned someone alive, or that time yugi made a bully allucinate by making him see everything around him as money for the rest of his life, or im the sequel when Marik makes Pandora's suicidal urges rise up again and said pandora would kill himself when the duel was over, or when...
Season 0! Ooh the forbidden season
I honestly loved this video, not only because you've been gone for some time but because everytime you put that much effort into a video it becomes a masterpiece, being a great combination of criticism and humor. I also got a lot of that nostalgic feeling when you showed footage of that King Kong game at 15:40 . So accurate.
Also... GREATO JOJOKE!!!!! 23:40
1:19 darkwood was in the making for 6 years
Finally! I can eat!
Also good video
Twatical be a gae
Who the fuck is twatical?
NETIO SYS mljoe
1933-1917 is my favorite part also hey areyes
"He can see visions into the past"....... Yeah, I think those are called memories.
FILM PUB bed time
58:00 he grew his finger back.
FILM PUB or visions into the past
I don't know why, maybe because it's very late and I'm tired, but this got me good
But they’re not memories because he didn’t experience it did he
This really reminds me of that one meme,
"By 2020 we will *cut all homeless people in half* "
It makes me wonder wth happened to homeless people now that corona is a thing
it’s 2025 doe
@@art-cs6us they were given free homes to social distance and be safe
(Also this is sarcasm I genuinely don’t know)
@@gotemm2.05 they were cut in half
Slice em in half
1:19 omg darkwood
Pyrocynical Cinematic Universe??? 😳😳
Yeah
2:46 Wow that person has a really nice profile
neat.
Mihail Golubovic im weak
you lack conviction shame on you for changing your name
Shut u fucking weeb
Amazing
so where's the petscop 11 & 12 review?
he didn't wanna have to play catch-up
3 week break, check ✔
Hour long video, check ✔
Ads spamming the entire videio: check ✔
About a game from 2005
I love it when his regular voice slips through by accident
Aaaaaay, dude this is fucking great! This game seriously doesn't get enough love, and I can't even fathom how much work this must have took. It's great to see you branch out and make something you're passionate about. Really solid, would love to see more like this!!
"...something isn't quite right."
*Sees shirtless men doing parkour*
Dear God!
Es 5Minuten die größte Frau
Arkham asylum
I feel like you need to play metro if you haven't yet. It follows a lot of these tenets, from the lack of cheap jumpscares to the dread of only having a single bullet in the chamber.
Serbia Strong its even more tense in last light, you're sneaking around with paper thin walls separating you and the enemy
I just know it for its music being MrPaladin's intro song.
I would love to see a modern day Condemned game. Maybe a spinoff of the original, but similar mechanics. One of the best "early" horror survival games there was. There was problems, but the atmosphere was great. Almost like Outlast, but you could fight back, with more enemies. This game was great, sucks I only remember it when I get recommended videos about it on the VERY long occasion.
I remember playing through this without taser by accident
What a lucky man.
_[DIES IN JAPANESE]_
Uwwwwwwaaaaa!!!
lol
Princess SparklySequins [DIES IN FRENCH]
(Dies in croatia)
Luka Curek
[dies in English]
Townsville is actually a real place
Apparently Australians aren't very imaginative
Hell no. Have you seen how we shorten names? We take a few letters from the end and replace them with a single o.
yeah I live there, its a shithole
Saladjones what? I live near the beach and it’s amazing
Suprisingly named after a guy named Robert Towns. I do wish I lived somewhere else haha
townsville is a total shit hole. if you go there you'll get mugged 3 times and asked if you want to buy weed like 10n times atleast
34:55 i was in full agrrement, but then i watched what happened after.
Modern music makes it 10 times better
This video provides full evidence that pyro is actually a long forgotten JoJo from a timeline we never knew existed
Why am I getting "Baby Shark Dance" adverts on this
Alexi
Shoot, I've got that kind of ADs outside PyroCynical's videos too, Lately!
Kenneth Paquito Now I'm getting toy review ads, seems like pyro tricked UA-cam.
Alexi samer
Alexi same*
i thought i am the only one
When anyone else is gone for a while: THEY DEAD NOOOOOOO
When pyro is gone for a while: hes just off makin good content
Minor Pear it genuinely is tho
What about animators?
that horrible time in pyrocynical history when he intentionally tried to make his voice sound deeper
Everyone talkin about petscop 2 but I think we should get Condemned 2
lmao yes
Condemned 2 exists bruh. It just never came to PC, you'd have to find an old copy for the Xbox 360 or the PS3
@@FunctionalBreadMachine or don't cuz its terrible and will just ruin your impression of the first one.
@@What-go8ng I wouldn't say that lol it's not THAT bad. I mean definitely not as good as the first game but Condemned 2 has some solid refinements to the fighting mechanics the story is just a lil' dooky is all.
@@FunctionalBreadMachine he meant a second condemned video, also, r/woosh
"When he channels his inner Jojo" *SHAKES VIOLENTLY TRYING NOT TO BE A WEEB*
"JoJo may be Japanese, but it ain't no weeb shit" - Jesus Christ, 23 A.D.
Accelorate jojosus
same
Weeb is the next level of humanity, normies resent it because deep down they know they'll never reach it.
Jesus Joestar
Metro City? So this game is set in the same world as MegaMind.
Aragog I was scrolling the comments for this xD
Ok when the gym teacher jumpscared us, even when it was hinted that it was a jump scare, I FUCKING JUMPED. Not exaggerating.
I love the long videos
Future Gamer i don’t
For breakfast?
Jakub Osada COONT
Same
Future Gamer same
what a marvallous video , watched it twice
you have a clear talent into narrating , explanning and entairtanning people , keep up the good work
Such quality content Pyro, it was worth the wait and I didn't skip any ads. :D
I like how nonchalantly you spoiled seven.
True, but to be fair, "what's in the box!?" is one of the most iconic movie lines of all time. People will quote it and even know the context without having seen Se7en, knowing that it's from Se7en, or even knowing what Se7en is at all. Lol
Movies old if you haven’t watched it by now your loss 🤷♂️
outstanding video as always, your channel has just improved leagues since I subscribed 2 years ago, glad to be a supporter and I hope you grow even more producing content like this 10/10 bro
LazerzZ your channel has improved aswell
@amish elmo, you focking wot mate?
2020 Pyrocynical "So here i have the new avatar 2 movie" (video length 10 hours)
Jaroslav Mrázek I wouldn’t mind that
I just watched the whole thing, amazing video pyro ❤️
holy shit the "wake up Mr. Freeman" that G-Man says at 21:10 was perfectly timed with Far Cry 2's opening screen appearing. Greatest crossover in history.
wdym far cry 2 where
@@leadpiper they were probably playing it themselves
I really enjoy game reviews like these, not only you give the games a fair an unbiased review, you add some comedy to it and makes it hilarious to watch!
I hope to see more reviews like these soon, love your videos!
1:04:26 Pyro's old outro. Enjoy it while it's still here.
Edit: It's gone. I'll try to find some of his other videos that still have them.
Nope. It's gone
I remember finding it in an older video where he used it in a fakeout outro. I don’t remember the title but it is still out there.
There is tho
It's here
I love how he was taking about the library enemies but didn't realize there supposed to be the victims in the fire the library's based on...
Ikr, like they clearly fit in
Yeah, they fit "lore wise," but they're a departure from the tone of the game and end up being "generic horror monster #2331" instead of one of the very real, tangible enemies in the game that wouldn't be too far fetched for the setting. Monolith went over the top when they shouldn't have. They added stupid hallucinatory filters over the screen to destroy any ambiguity as to whether what you were seeing was indeed real by affirming that said hallucination was a hallucination with "LOOK!! LOOK AT OUR FILTERS!!" They added too many stupid, fantastical enemies that couldn't possibly exist in this world setting, sequel retcon or no. It should have been a very real, tense game based on tangible, legitimate fears of things like crazy junkies and hobos beating you death in abandoned buildings.
But like an eight year old drinking too many Monsters, they went fucking apeshit instead and made some parts of the game a generic slog with tons of mid 2000's tropes that been beaten to death in the industry. The sequel, while it definitely wasn't bad overall story notwithstanding, suffered even moreso from this problem. Now the crazy hobo rioters are wearing animal masks, and you have to fight a crazy clown bitch wielding a circular saw polearm painted like a giant lollipop. These aren't inherently bad ideas for certain types of games, but why the fuck would you disrupt the realistic, mature tone of Condemned that was absolutely brilliant with a bunch of silly shit like emaciated schoolboys crawling around on all fours and a disfigured, obese lunchlady wielding a butcher knife? It's just fucking silly and over the top, and it doesn't match the rest of the game's tone. That's more of what I gathered from Pyro's assessment than anything.
And I actually disagree with him about the subway tunnel rat people "fitting" the universe. They're fucking stupid, too. That kind of shit would've been okay for something like any of the umpteen million "horror themed" over-the-top shooters produced in mid-to-late 2000's (i.e. F.E.A.R., The Suffering, etc.) but why sully the believable tone of this game with that? If you just want to go apeshit, then go full apeshit. But they didn't do that. The devs showed some restraint, which leads me to believe that they weren't all on board with the idea of the game being a tense "hobo/junkie survival simulator" and tossed in a bunch of crazy shit later to draw in more of the teen boy market.
@@BigPuddin Sir, this is a Wendy's.
@@tezatocos6033 You can't silence the truth. I'm preaching it from my burger pedestal, my good man.
@@BigPuddin Of course. How foolish of me.
1:19 pyro predicted the darkwood video
when you said 'metro city' the only thing i could think of was megamind
Megamind is everywhere
"JoJo" *INTENSE BREATHING*
Stand Master: Pyrocynical
Stand Name:『Whitewoods』
To be continued
Yung Giorno jojo fans unite lmao
Funny valentine summons another pyrocynical.
Part 5 is Coming....
Dont... Worry
Well, I really enjoyed your video, and I can see some improvements over your other videos. I can't even imagine how much effort you have put into this video. However, I think there are some points on the video were you repeat yourself a little bit, and the "flow" of the review wasn't the best. However, I would really like to see more game reviews like this one (maybe decrease the length a little bit), keep up the good work pyro,
This one of the greatest games I ever played.
AAA Developers just don’t have it in them to give us a game with good atmosphere anymore.
You're wrong. But UA-cam commenters always try to sound smart why they aren't
@@alfalldoot6715 When*
😑😐🤐
Facts bruh all these new games are so garbage except a few, old games are just way better
I like how the whole narrative is that Ethan is framed for the deaths of those cops, but its clearly shown that SKX had his fingerprints on the gun and they don't think to investigate the second set of fingerprints? It could be argued that "Maybe SKX wiped the gun" but what about the fact that Ethan was thrown out of a window from three stories high. Maybe they thought murder-suicide, if so why didn't Ethan off himself at any of the opportunities he had going home? Most of the evidence points away from Ethan being the killer and the whole narrative is a semi truck balanced on toothpicks.
And all they had to do was make the guy wear gloves...
Whats this? A 1-hour video with less ads in than a 10:01 minute GTA video? Hmm...
Ree e GTA vids aren't bad compared to justalexhalford. 10 midroll ads in a 10 min video
exellent choice.
As a games art and design student, I love these game reviews you do, because it's so insightful into how a real gamer experiences the game as opposed to someone who made it would experience it. Designing games makes you have more respect for how much work goes into making it, but also can make you blind or more forgiving to some of the faults that stop the game from being perfect. Thank you for helping out the next generation of game makers; these reviews are always so thoroughly done, you can expect a future with even better games. :)
If IGN could review like this.
Batatinha com lepra 10/10 would condemn again.
30:30
Can we appreciate how real that early morning vibe is? Shit's all grey and blurry when he gets up, goes for the light hoping it will improve things...
It just makes everyone's eyes hurt and things harder to see.