Do we need to meet new people and make new friends? Challenges and Tips.

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  • Опубліковано 25 вер 2021
  • This week, Jules, Ivy and Lorna talk about how they make meaningful connections with people in their 30s, why it's a bit more difficult to make those connections now, and how they navigate this path.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 332

  • @cha_tuja
    @cha_tuja 2 роки тому +235

    Lornzie is serving the truth today! If you don't have the emotional capacity, imagine it's not a must.

  • @hope.n.wilson
    @hope.n.wilson 2 роки тому +161

    Am with Lornzie 100%, i can make professional connections without necessarily building to friendships but yet stay open to it if it's meant to be... rather than overloading my emotional capacity.

  • @winnieroze
    @winnieroze 2 роки тому +132

    When Ivy is moderating it really gets that Money Monday vibe. More interviewish less chitchat-ish, really focused conversation and everyone gets a chance to share their side of it

    • @kangethe7s
      @kangethe7s 2 роки тому +3

      Factsss✴

    • @hope.n.wilson
      @hope.n.wilson 2 роки тому +37

      But chitchat is also good sometimes cause we get to learn somethings from their unplanned vulnerability

    • @winnieroze
      @winnieroze 2 роки тому +7

      @@hope.n.wilson sure thing. I like the episodes whichever way

  • @vivienorengo-owuor1300
    @vivienorengo-owuor1300 2 роки тому +12

    I like how Jules is in touch with her spiritual self '"I don't think that God can give you a desire for something and not give you the resources to do it".

  • @mawiafay5889
    @mawiafay5889 2 роки тому +97

    When Jules said, "Your tone matters" I felt that. I may forget what you said, but never will I forget how you made me feel, so f*ck yeah tone matters.

  • @ritanjiru4066
    @ritanjiru4066 2 роки тому +130

    Adulting is hard guys. Lately most of my friends have become 'people I know' I realized I have been watering dead plants. Always the one checking up and when I don't they don't.😒 So road to meaningful connections. 💁‍♀️

  • @ashaba3932
    @ashaba3932 2 роки тому +61

    Ivy is serving a look for us today💅🏿

  • @MercyTait
    @MercyTait 2 роки тому +58

    Ivy's personality is amazing !!! Ivy, Don't dim the light trying to fit in. You are dope as you are !!

  • @carolmutua5266
    @carolmutua5266 2 роки тому +37

    I relate to Lornzie so much. Introvert struggles😭 Small talk literally kills me. What are we even talking about?

  • @happyguy255
    @happyguy255 2 роки тому +33

    Being an introvert is such a struggle.....I always strive to meet new people but I also cant stand small talk.....but as Lorna said alcohol sometimes helps and having extroverted friends has proven to be quite crucial.....its always nice to see a fellow introvert share their life experience

  • @HeyPhonsi
    @HeyPhonsi 2 роки тому +51

    I am those people who don't have friends. I am an introvert and my social battery is kidogo... I feel more energized being alone working than hanging out with people.

    • @Ichbinthee_dali
      @Ichbinthee_dali 2 роки тому +1

      Ooooooooh my God! This is me! 😅

    • @evelynelilian1972
      @evelynelilian1972 2 роки тому +4

      Meeeeee 😂😂.Sometimes I sit and Wonder form ni gani.I dont like people

    • @kristinekiarie7848
      @kristinekiarie7848 2 роки тому

      Woooow.....same introvert gal en reqlly selective on who to hang out wit🙆

    • @geewangare
      @geewangare 2 роки тому +2

      I so feel you, I enjoy my space and company most of the time. We should start an introverts group lol!

    • @HeyPhonsi
      @HeyPhonsi 2 роки тому +4

      @@geewangare Hahaha we start an introvert group, then who is going to keep it engaged. 😂😂

  • @timothymaracha1437
    @timothymaracha1437 2 роки тому +53

    I realized especially when you need to meet people especially people you want to learn from, you can provide a venue for them to meet and do some fun activities, be the provider because they are so used to giving either resources or advice or just anything, be the giver they will naturally gravitate towards you and ask questions and you'll have changed the game instead of you going to them they'll come to you and they'll remember you.

  • @mferrister
    @mferrister 2 роки тому +30

    Lornzie's pony tail is beautiful. Infact all the ladies look amazing and beautiful😍

  • @margiemweru1833
    @margiemweru1833 2 роки тому +60

    My current struggle tbh. Recently turned 27 and realized I barely have any networks. When ivy keeps saying that your network is your net worth on #moneymondays,it triggers me...I feel poor. I've been so snobbish of people who reach out to me, maybe coz I fear being vulnerable. But I'm actively learning to be better.

  • @TheMotivationHubPodcast
    @TheMotivationHubPodcast 2 роки тому +45

    Ivy seems different today. A good different. It seems like she is baring her soul and opening up more. Learning and unlearning is definitely something I'm constantly working on as well.

    • @fayebagamuhunda65
      @fayebagamuhunda65 2 роки тому +2

      Her confidence has grown on this show! The poise with which she stirred this episode is remarkable.

  • @davidmuchoki1489
    @davidmuchoki1489 2 роки тому +6

    I used to think I was weird until I heard Lornzie talk today...nimejikubali sasa. I really get worked up when I try to socialize with new faces.😂😭

  • @leslie7974
    @leslie7974 2 роки тому +15

    That Jules point of tone,i had to check my mother on it and now we're best friends.Sometimes to reach the diamond you need force.

  • @j.mars2547
    @j.mars2547 2 роки тому +62

    I'm learning to have zero expectations not necessarily in trying to make new friends or relationships but also in life. It not only reduces the chances of you being hurt but also it increases the chances of you being open to what the universe has to offer. Absolutely loved the episode 💯💯💯🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

    • @chelseakoveti5674
      @chelseakoveti5674 2 роки тому +1

      I am with you on this.. I got the same concept from an author and a public speaker…Wayne Dyer??

    • @j.mars2547
      @j.mars2547 2 роки тому

      @@chelseakoveti5674 not really .... It's just from my personal experiences and some self help books like the Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz . It changed how I looked at relationships. I'll look into Wayne Dyer though 😃💯💯

  • @lessstresscommunication8642
    @lessstresscommunication8642 2 роки тому +2

    I read this somewhere and it has been my mantra for this topic of friendship "I place my friends in three mental categories; (1) Best Friends (2) Good Friends (3) Acquaintances. It's important that I understand where they stand in my life because unmet expectations breed frustration. Some of you are expecting your number 3's to ack like 1's"

  • @faithsimano1662
    @faithsimano1662 2 роки тому +22

    I'm like a fusion of Ivy n Lorna. I can easily make friends but maintaining the friendship weh 😂😂is a hustle. Yet I'm really young Amazing episode ☺️.

  • @johnjumwa5016
    @johnjumwa5016 2 роки тому +48

    Such a timely conversation, this has been on my mind a lot lately.

    • @carolinemwikali3121
      @carolinemwikali3121 2 роки тому +1

      I agree it's hard making friendships

    • @Tata-bd9nx
      @Tata-bd9nx 2 роки тому +2

      I'm glad there are men who enjoy Over25 as much as us.😁😁

  • @esthergitonga6305
    @esthergitonga6305 2 роки тому +2

    watching you feels like having 4 beautiful elder sisters who walk me through life... Such a blessing.

  • @peggykarimi8664
    @peggykarimi8664 2 роки тому +2

    Officially turned over 25 yesterday (26) been a huge fan since i was 23 through.

  • @krystyntyrone3949
    @krystyntyrone3949 2 роки тому +18

    Am glued at ivy’s outfit..that blue is serving looks❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @cl499
    @cl499 2 роки тому +14

    What a coincidence?
    Yesterday i was thinking how hard it is to make friends, i have serious trust issues, i question peoples intentions, been done bad in the past.
    I really long for people whom we can have great conversations and not just gossip

  • @marywambui1347
    @marywambui1347 2 роки тому +4

    This year i have really learnt a lot about friendships.. its good to know where your 'friends' have kept you (lack of a better word) because you may be there for them all through and one day you realize you didn't mean all that to them,,, my painful lesson this year , am now making meaningful friendships and its beautiful because most of them we are like-minded.

  • @hendritahwanjala3101
    @hendritahwanjala3101 2 роки тому +7

    Ivy amesema tusema tulike before tuwatch...whoms am I to refuse?? 😆😆

  • @vivianochieng7411
    @vivianochieng7411 2 роки тому +3

    I’m a lot like Julia. If you come at me the wrong way, even if I’m wrong, it shall not go very well. And my family keeps scolding me about it. They say I take things to personally and I’m burning a lot of bridges because of it. But I just feel that your tone and how to communicate to me and your energy is a BIG deal and if it’s not right, I’d rather not pretend to be okay and yet I’m not.

  • @esthersserwanga
    @esthersserwanga 2 роки тому +12

    Really enjoyed todays conversation - Ivy is a fantastic hostess and it was lovely to have her back on the show. This conversation is really important especially in this post (?) covid space - finding your tribe and nurturing those relationships. its a daily struggle for me but I do have some takeaway lessons from the episode. It's so lovely to see Lorna blossom; I loved seeing her contribute more to todays conversation and as a fellow introvert, I identified so much with what she had to say but would encourage her to take on the counsel from Ivy to just try and get out of the shell. It's so difficult for us introverts though 😭😭😭. Jules as usual is a whole vibe on her own - she should have her own talk show. Jules is easily Kenya's Oprah. She is hilarious, relatable, wise, practical, easy to listen to .. I love her!

  • @nashenesamo3681
    @nashenesamo3681 2 роки тому +8

    I totally agree with Lornzie, honestly my current friendships are like cactus. I barely communicate or meet up that much because adulting is the hood of the hoodest.

  • @aysherbint2684
    @aysherbint2684 2 роки тому +55

    As an introvert, this episode was A LOT…. I wish it was easy to just flow! Aki people can be draining… how do you start a conversation? How do you walk away from one?! Small talks ah ah

    • @fatmaayan5104
      @fatmaayan5104 2 роки тому +3

      Same sis, it is very hard. It is just too much.

    • @ilungasaya437
      @ilungasaya437 2 роки тому +5

      I can relate . Let’s just start here and be friends lol

    • @rao023
      @rao023 2 роки тому +2

      Yaaaas. People can be draining esp for an introvert

    • @lovechild4141
      @lovechild4141 2 роки тому +3

      @@ilungasaya437 yes! 😌have us our own little introverted crew

    • @patsymusic3985
      @patsymusic3985 2 роки тому +2

      Well 5 years back i was like on top of the social circle ....but now am like a social introvert....it exists guys...😂....

  • @catherinekagechu9399
    @catherinekagechu9399 2 роки тому +17

    I really appreciate your topics ... I am in my 40s and learning.

  • @kittykitavi6778
    @kittykitavi6778 2 роки тому +23

    The book " How to Win Friends & Influence People" by Dale Carneige is an invaluable resource

  • @vallariekotheck6038
    @vallariekotheck6038 2 роки тому +28

    I just can’t explain how much i learn from you guys
    I am turning 23 in a month,and I always feel blessed to have known your channel,a was taking notes 📝 the whole time😂,can’t wait for next Monday
    ❤️❤️❤️

  • @delphineuwase5594
    @delphineuwase5594 2 роки тому +2

    Ivy, you should read "The year of Yes" by Shonda Rhymes. She recalls her experiences during her yescapade.

  • @TheLifeAlphabet
    @TheLifeAlphabet 2 роки тому +2

    Nice episode!!, being an introvert, i really get drained by small talk.....i would rather just sit and listen than talk... i thrive best in my own little world than in groups and i love it that way

  • @alexkathurima
    @alexkathurima 2 роки тому +6

    Jules has just spoken exactly what I have been fighting within myself since USIU...am I a musician or a corporate person. It was really antagonising. I believe that people shouldn't give up but, just grow up. Every experience is part of maturing us.

  • @OliviaMukora
    @OliviaMukora 2 роки тому +3

    Tone and words ARE everything😂😂
    I'm those people who can think about someone's tone even months later

  • @lynnshiro6984
    @lynnshiro6984 2 роки тому +3

    This combination of ladies with great personalities, beautiful, very informative is just what I need. I feel like you are my friends. Great work ladies...

  • @judyt3202
    @judyt3202 2 роки тому +3

    This is such an eyeopener for me.Been struggling to relate with people.Thanks alot ladies.💗💞

  • @joycemburu8041
    @joycemburu8041 2 роки тому +10

    You're all glowing...Thanks for making our Mondays special ❤️❤️❤️

  • @Michelle-me6sg
    @Michelle-me6sg 2 роки тому +18

    Love this episode... this is the kind of honesty that's required for friendships to succeed! Keep it up guys!!

  • @elaineachieng632
    @elaineachieng632 2 роки тому +2

    AUTHENTICITY!! GEMS!! I really apreciate your input to the society.

  • @ken4722
    @ken4722 2 роки тому +5

    Thanks Jules for that point on alignment. Some habits and traits about us cannot be permanently fixed. We'll be triggered and resort to our comfortable defense mechanisms. It's normal. What's important is recognizing when you retreat to old ways and getting comfortable with apologizing to people and promising yourself you will try to handle similar situations much better in the future

  • @rozettamumera8626
    @rozettamumera8626 2 роки тому +4

    First time listening. I am sold, this is so meaningful.

  • @tembakutondo8134
    @tembakutondo8134 2 роки тому +6

    Love this topic. There is a podcast I listened to which said that if the intention is not clear it becomes manipulation.. so set the intention for the connection clear

  • @lorahperez2274
    @lorahperez2274 2 роки тому

    The part where Lorna is starting to yawn🤣🤣🤣 and Jules shamelessly points it out

  • @ithankgod5733
    @ithankgod5733 2 роки тому +3

    Ivy being self aware and conscientious has been the highlight of the recent blogs!
    I am very proud of her!

  • @linnetkasivu3054
    @linnetkasivu3054 2 роки тому +5

    Having a Friend who understands you and pushes you to be better other than seeing you as toxic is the best thing 💯, communication solves alot too. Powerful chat 🙌

  • @norah1091
    @norah1091 2 роки тому

    Much needed, I really needed. I have learnt that I have to be intentional about making meaningful connections with like-minded people, also, I can have a tight circle of friends and still be intentional about seeking other like minded people.

  • @giniah0892
    @giniah0892 2 роки тому +6

    I love how Ivy has grown. You facilitated this session so well. And kudos on your self-awareness

  • @yourstrulyKe
    @yourstrulyKe 2 роки тому +10

    Haiya I totally related with Lorna in this episode. I fucking hate small talk😂 As an introvert it's really hard to make new connections/friends😅 I'd rather stick to my ride or dies🥂

  • @barnettedavids7653
    @barnettedavids7653 2 роки тому +2

    Watched this video just when I've intentionally purposed to review my friends/social life and I got so shocked that I actually don't have friends, over the years a lot of people I called friends really hurt me and messed me up and it has really taken some time for me to want to have friends, but again I'm human and I've been feeling particularly lonely lately but I can't seem to bring myself to find friends or just people to talk to but with all this knowledge I've gathered today I feel I'm definitely at a better place to get new and meaningful connections, thanks girls for this talk, really helped.

  • @alanpierrers
    @alanpierrers 2 роки тому +7

    The content is so relatable now that we're in our 30s. Content worth a watch, channel worth a subscribe! From 🇹🇿

  • @b_mod_st
    @b_mod_st 2 роки тому +10

    Watched this just when yesterday I spent a whole afternoon conversing about how loyalty doesn't even exist in most friendships... people stick with other's for selfish gain....and some friends honestly are a whole emotional baggage

  • @jenifferwanjiru6298
    @jenifferwanjiru6298 2 роки тому +1

    Welcome back Ivy..you look amazing

  • @lifeinitscolours4206
    @lifeinitscolours4206 2 роки тому +13

    Lornzie😍😍😍 you and I are so much alike, small talk, socializing..... Not my cup of tea, it's haaaaard

  • @wanjanjama
    @wanjanjama 2 роки тому +1

    Everything about this video 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 Thank you so much for this - it is so timely for me in my personal life. Thank you 💓💛💛💓

  • @mmasamo1986
    @mmasamo1986 2 роки тому +1

    This is a great topic. Thank you for all the highlights and all the tips you provided. Being intentional and seeing how people are healing their traumas is my big guide when searching for a friend. When making meaningful connections, I attend events and collaborate a lot. A meaningful connection should always be beneficial, targeted and highly intentional. I am an introvert but when it comes to a business I create an agenda in my mind, or I just talk on what I know. Virtual coffee, virtual lunch or a virtual hangout is what I do mostly. I meet people in conferences, virtual conferences, the common activity groups, and through people I have done business with and I liked the experience.

  • @hangwithivy
    @hangwithivy 2 роки тому +14

    Lornzie has made me feel like i am a normal human being. I struggle with my current group of friends. i cannot deal with a bigger circle

  • @ruthkiruki7333
    @ruthkiruki7333 2 роки тому +2

    this was a great convo!! I like that every POV on this topic has come through from each one of you but Julz on spiritual alignment you got me...

  • @jbutinde5551
    @jbutinde5551 2 роки тому +19

    Hmm! Was literally thinking about this yesterday. Feels like it's harder to make new friends as I get older.

  • @MarthamwangiYthera
    @MarthamwangiYthera 2 роки тому +5

    I have made peace with the fact that am not a good friend and I can be selfish. I am working on correcting that side of me and becoming a better human.

  • @sharonann7205
    @sharonann7205 2 роки тому +1

    we need more of these conversations .You guys teach alot.

  • @immaculatenyawira2849
    @immaculatenyawira2849 2 роки тому +2

    So refreshing!❤️
    And to Jules yes please think about the art growth lessons,painting etc..😊
    People like I ,would love that kind of community connection.

  • @brendahkinoti6381
    @brendahkinoti6381 2 роки тому +9

    Loved the conversation!! Am like Lornzie introvert wise! I struggle to make small talk😅 Also i thinknthe growth is because you have now become consistent with posting and we are here for it!!!

  • @styled_by_fash
    @styled_by_fash 2 роки тому +3

    Lorna is so me…I also feel like I have everything on my phone 😂 ..very intentional about the connections I try to make as an adult and small talk is just something I can’t keep up with.

  • @jowyobado33
    @jowyobado33 2 роки тому +1

    23 and loving it here!

  • @fariahhanif166
    @fariahhanif166 2 роки тому +3

    Hi. long time follower first time commenter. Can I just say how much I appreciate the candidness with you lot. Amazing how this talk corresponds with what am going through at the moment, Iove it.

  • @annettemutio2149
    @annettemutio2149 2 роки тому +1

    👌👌👍👍👍I love this conversation.

  • @mukalolungile9075
    @mukalolungile9075 2 роки тому +3

    Absolutely needed this!

  • @mercyk8559
    @mercyk8559 2 роки тому +1

    I'm with Lornzie on these introverted struggles. A glass of wine or fabulous cocktail, really helps me loosen up to interact more with strangers and stop overthinking the situation 💯😂

  • @renee7171
    @renee7171 2 роки тому +1

    I am so Lornzie at this stage of my life! From 2014 every year my resolution was no new friends and I think this will continue for sometime. Relocating twice the past 3 years has moved me to make friends but I’ve made very few but meaningful connections. I also hear Ivy because when I moved her approach now is what I used to make friends and then filtered them down.

  • @sharonkiptoo9729
    @sharonkiptoo9729 2 роки тому +2

    I resonate so much Lornzie 💯💕

  • @mollykamau4045
    @mollykamau4045 2 роки тому

    This talk is soo timely for me… love you gals

  • @chenairuzive7037
    @chenairuzive7037 2 роки тому

    Wueh!!! really enjoyed this conversation. Thank you ladies

  • @joycemburu8041
    @joycemburu8041 2 роки тому +3

    Welcome back ivy! 😍

  • @liznoir
    @liznoir 2 роки тому

    You guys are top tier in helping the yout and everyone in between. Thank you so much for staying true to who you are and I love you guys’s friendship. The best Kenyan influencers in town aki.

  • @teresiasyowai5156
    @teresiasyowai5156 2 роки тому +5

    Been thinking about this a lot lately..thanks for the tips

  • @evansmosomi6892
    @evansmosomi6892 2 роки тому +1

    Let's just say your videography and quality are crisp!!! Would love a tour of your setup and equipment. Keep at it!

  • @MyJoan88
    @MyJoan88 2 роки тому

    Julia it's such a delight listening to you!!!

  • @kurgatpurity2171
    @kurgatpurity2171 2 роки тому

    So helpful. Thanks ladies.

  • @wakanyoninyaga
    @wakanyoninyaga 2 роки тому +1

    yaaaaayyy I'm happy to see you guys ...hay atleast I have something to watch in the evening. Yaaayyy

  • @elizabethmwangi1390
    @elizabethmwangi1390 2 роки тому +2

    i love today's discussion.I am an introvert and I have been trying to break out of my shell.Thank you for the tips1

  • @wamboijoy453
    @wamboijoy453 2 роки тому

    After watching your TED talk then this....you guys are on fire....love all the way

  • @jackiekinyua274
    @jackiekinyua274 2 роки тому +1

    Highlight of my day🤗🤗🤗love you guys❤

  • @nadiaayaakiseka6436
    @nadiaayaakiseka6436 2 роки тому

    Loved this episode and really needed it, thank you ladies

  • @wanguimuiruri5748
    @wanguimuiruri5748 2 роки тому

    Loved it ❤️. So timely 👏🏾

  • @puritykiprop4272
    @puritykiprop4272 2 роки тому +22

    I understand Ivy's struggle. That's so me 😌

    • @charitymwaura5289
      @charitymwaura5289 2 роки тому +1

      Me too

    • @WNK645
      @WNK645 2 роки тому +1

      Me tooo😂

    • @WNK645
      @WNK645 2 роки тому +1

      We need a support group!Alpha females☺️

  • @stelakem
    @stelakem 2 роки тому +1

    I love Jules 💜. I relate with her on so many levels like when she starts quoting the likes of Abraham Hicks, Eckhart Tolle, and other spiritual gurus. Also when she said I'd rather have a best friend than a boyfriend..💯. I look forward to making a real life connection with you Jules 😁

  • @evekagia3078
    @evekagia3078 2 роки тому +1

    Authentic conversation 💯

  • @towettlynn6124
    @towettlynn6124 2 роки тому

    love love how y'all know yourselves.

  • @violakalembe7795
    @violakalembe7795 2 роки тому +2

    Wow...
    Enjoyed this!
    Learnt alot

  • @minayomuya
    @minayomuya 2 роки тому +1

    Such a cool episode!

  • @zio-21
    @zio-21 2 роки тому +11

    Small talk is abit weird for me too. Lornzie +me =🤝

  • @mikasa7718
    @mikasa7718 2 роки тому

    Loved this episode. 💯

  • @ken4722
    @ken4722 2 роки тому +5

    For me, networking is tough for me cause I feel like people think I am forcing myself on them when I have always PRIDED (hahaha) myself in wanting people not to think I want them like that. Same with ordinary friendships. I'll take a number in a party and never follow up cause I'll assume they'll think I want them too bad. Crazy

  • @rosemarymbonika8945
    @rosemarymbonika8945 2 роки тому

    I am so LORNA NOW,I always relate to Jules or Ivy, but today oh Lorna I feel u!!

  • @wanjiruwambugu7336
    @wanjiruwambugu7336 2 роки тому

    Learning to learn myself....💙💙

  • @Nancy-tp8fw
    @Nancy-tp8fw 2 роки тому +1

    This is one of my favourite episodes this year, I feel like I'm at counseling guys. I'm very good at making friends and meaningful connections, BUT HORRIBLE at maintaining them, especially when going through a tough time, The last 2 years have been horrible for me and I completely shut off friends that I have known over 11 years, I didn't trust anyone apart from my sisters and a cousin . I really need help with maintaining relationships. Thank you guys for this topic

    • @doriswilson777
      @doriswilson777 2 роки тому

      Aaah completely relate with your comment especially on the last two years bit and shutting off friends completely. Mine is worse coz even family is not spared especially when on a downhill. I try but just cannot let people in when spiraling.