I’ve got a favour to ask! If you enjoy this, please double check that you’ve liked the video and subscribed to the channel! Thats a small way you can help us carry on doing this ❤️🙏🏾 really appreciate you!
Just so you know, I watch Steven but don't subscribe for quite a rubbish reason. I take care of my Mum & she watches a lot of YT but she's 88 & couldn't get the sign in & out thing so disturbingly whenever I'd go to watch my feed was full of nothing but Harry & Meghan...pages & pages & pages 🤨 dreadful! So now everyone in the house goes on YT as a Guest. I'm subscribed on my phone but like to watch your show on the telly. I always feel guilty & like I'm nicking your show when you ask us to subscribe!
Fellow divorce attorney here (Pennsylvania and New Jersey). So much of what James is saying about marriage, divorce, and relationships is spot on. I’m really happy there is a platform to get the message out directly from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Great video!
Divorce is money making business. Why get married? Why don’t you just live together without a label of married or belonging to someone? If you decide to have children why don’t they (2 people) sign a memo of understanding for both to raise that chid or children & have it notarized and presented to justice of peace for a binding contract? Too much nonsense in marriage when two people fall apart. Lawyers like it bc they’re the only one benefit. If you do not agree, proof yourself wrong. Thank you very much.
He is so right. My parents have been married for 29 years and they loved us so much but they were not overly obsessed with their children. They prioritized their relationship, personal identities, careers, and travels together to be the best parents they could be. I love that I still get to have happily married parents to this day ♥️
My husband and I prioritize each other over our kids. This looks different in different homes. It means sometimes kids' baths are rushed, and sometimes a bedtime story is brief. Sometimes, they don't get to go to the park. He does shift work, and we prioritize time with each other when we can. We've noticed something. Our kids are happy and healthy ❤️. They are growing up in a home with parents who know each other well, spend time together and are heads over heels for each other. Our home's atmosphere is loving and peaceful. There's something ordinary yet magical about that.
SPOT ON!!!! So why the kids are brats ending up with divorced parents fighting over the kids. Kids see divided parents like a shark smells blood in the water and use it to their full advantage. Because THEY’RE THE KIDS who need united PARENTS teaching them the proper order of things. Failure to do this often leads to grown kids who disdain one or both parents who then estrange them.
That's what happens when a good man knows he's her #1. When a guy is expected to do everything to support her and the family but gets nothing in return, the only thing that is built is resentment.
My husband and i talked before getting married ,we both asked each other if we would prioritise our children above each other. when they were young. We wrote the answer down on a piece of paper and handed it to each other. We both had written YES and we did. He said he couldnt marry someone who wouldnt put our children first and i agreed.We had 35 yrs together before became terminally ill with cancer,it was my and my childrens priviledge to nurse him to the end.I asked him if he regretted anything in his life ,he said no.I think the issue is wether you agree on what your priorities will be.
I have a co worker whom he & his wife prioritized their children first they been married for 45years & he said that’s his only regret, because him & his wife barely know each other they changed over the years, the kids are grown and out the house and barely come visit them
I listened to the podcast… did i miss something or was it one of those “read in between the lines” kind of thing? I don’t remember him saying (and tied even relistening to certain areas) “if kids are your top priority, you’ll divorce “. My take-away was feeding your kids the illusion that he talks about. I know, and have listened to, many podcasts with Jordan Peterson and he’s a strong advocate for long term marriage. Has some VERY strong arguments for it, too. And if you take Sexton’s “the wisdom you find is the one you bring up bring up there” the same issues can follow from one relationship to another unless you work through them. Maybe working through them with the partner you have children with is the solution. But i do understand it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. Every relationship is unique with it own individual challenges.
@nicolegarceau9610 Whoever labeled the podcast insinuated it. In any case, it's a common problem. When the kids grow up and leave home, many marriage partners find they are nearly strangers, because they've thrown all their attention at the kids for 20 years. At this point, many married people decide to split. They have failed to provide an example to their own children of how to maintain love relationship with a spouse.
This man is a philosopher who poses as a VERY VERY GOOD ATTORNEY. lol like his depth and even the way the pitch of his voice switches back and forth has such raw vulnerable honesty. I love this
Marriage slippage is a term that refers to a gradual decline in the quality of a marital relationship over time. It often happens subtly and may involve reduced emotional connection, communication, intimacy, or general engagement between partners. Causes can range from daily life stresses, lack of communication, unmet expectations, or changes in priorities. Without intentional effort to reconnect and address these changes, the relationship may feel strained or distant, though not necessarily ending in separation or divorce.
I am planning a wedding right now for my fiance and I. I became so stressed out when I was trying to do it the "traditional" way, then I threw all of that away and started planning around what WE would want. I am planning the fanciest pizza party anyone has ever been to! Keeping the budget low, and giving space for us to have fun with the people we love most.
Probably the best thing ever ; starting A marriage with Financial stress isn’t a good thing either . The total cost of weddings is absolutely outrageous lately ; it’s lovely to see Couples who are prioritizing what’s best for the two of them Vs taking advice from family or Spending more 🤑 than you initially wanted 💯💯!!! Always follow your intuition !! Best of luck on ya wedding & wishing you two success in your Marriage.
This one took me by surprise. I expected to hear about divorce, the process, the mistakes, etc. Instead I sat with tears welling up as James spoke about death and dying. I also learned his mother had leiomyosarcoma. I also have this very rare cancer and have been dealing with it since 2020. I'm Stage 4. Statistically, I'm not supposed to be alive. Thank you James for sharing your stories and perspective. I live in joy and try to 'soften' when things are difficult. Thank you DOAC team for this episode.
@hollyhansomsvillage Blessings to you. It’s a miracle youve made it 4yrs. Wishing you peace, comfort, love. Will say a prayer for you. I hope you’re having a good day today. ☮️ Take care. A sister of mine had leiomyosarcoma~ a spindle cell sarcoma ~ her cancer occurred due to tp53 genetic mutation (which is also called Li Fraumeni syndrome). Turned out this genetic mutation is in our family lineage so then all family were tested to see who else had the genetic mutation. During my sister’s first surgery, she had full hysterectomy, removal of her omentum connective tissue, part of her colon, and bits/pieces off an adrenal gland…. The docs tried to get as large of margins as possible. Anyway, wishing you much strength and all the best.
Sorry to hear that. As you have nothing to lose and as you still enjoy life, maybe go full carnivore, miracles.happen (Dr Berry, Dr Chafee, etc etc ). With love.
I watch his first interview with James yesterday. I have seen it on my feed for at least a week before I watched it. I thought it was just something from the menasphere community. Man was it amazing interview and nothing what I expected it to be
Same i was surprised. My mom is going through brain cancer right now after having lung cancer. This is what I needed to hear right now. Thanks for this episode.
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
Parting with someone you love is always a challenging process, but in my experience, I had the guidance of a spiritual guide who prevented my marriage from collapsing. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
Love this comment!!💞 Please don't miss out on your perfect one..because of this opinion. It's exactly that an opinion. Especially the part on marraige is dangerous.
This made me cry so much. Thank you. This was life changing experience. I went through the divorce with one husband and I went through the death with the second. I never knew I need to hear this, but now I am looking back to my life differently. The talk about death change my life perspective so much. I am forcing everyone who I love, to watch this interview. Amazing!!!
This man has really changed my opinion on what I thought divorce lawyers were all like. He's got such a huge heart. I've been married almost 9 years now and going strong. I don't claim to be an expert on marriage at all lol but I can say me and my hubby prioritize each other even though we have 4 kids and we don't forget that it was us two in the beginning that started this family.
How? My kids are little time bandits. (I’m also a stay at home mom), I don’t even get to sleep without one of them or both of them on my side of the bed. In 6 years we’ve had like 12-13 dates without the kids. I’m the one who makes every meal, does every bath, gets them dressed, takes them to school, clean when they leave. How do ppl not fall into this.
@@trevnti We've got 4 kids and we've never let them sleep in our bed so it's just not something they even want to do or think about at all. And I do all of that stuff too during the week when my hubby works but on weekends he pitches in and helps me out. We've had a system for years now (his idea) that on weekends we split up the days so that both of us get to relax. I do breakfast with the kids and lunch while he relaxes in the bedroom with his video games, then in the evening he does dinner and everything after with the kids while I get to relax in the bedroom reading and watching UA-cam (which I'm doing right now lol). Yeah some weekends there's too much going on to pull it off, but most weekends are chill and we manage. It makes both of us happier and more appreciative of the other when we can have that relax time to ourselves. Then when the kids are in their beds asleep, we have our adult time. The smaller kids (7 and 8) go to bed at 9 and the teens stay in their rooms anyways so we get a couple hours of alone time before bed. You just have to set up systems to make it work!
@@madsquishy3410you are a very thoughtful couple, congrats, it’s good to see parents working as a good and efficient team, really insightful and inspiring 🧚🏼♀️
You guys made that choice to have only 12 dates in 6 years. Its your job to get the babies to a sitter and budget for it if not and there are budget constraints then at least do dates at home when the kids are asleep and dont let the kids run you you have to change your whole family dynamic for it to work
She's a great lawyer and very soulful. Despite being trans, she really took me by surprise about how serious she is and doesn't even make reverence to her trans identity. She's a great role model
I think James is by far my favorite guest on any podcast. His eloquence, his wit, his sense of humor - coupled with a wonderful depth of wisdom and live experience. So happy this conversation was as long as it was; it felt like it blew by in 1 hour. \
This lawyer has a degree in psycholgy. He is also an excellent performer. He is acting all the time. His body language, his voice, the way he uses his gestures, he is amazing. He even cries. The perfect combination to be a succesful lawyer in the US.
@@tatatat-vm9dl I was married to a guy like this. He could cry on queue. Sometimes had me believing it but deep down I was sceptical. However because I didn't fake cry I thought other people didn't. My life has been filled with fake liars. I believed them. I didn't realise people just make 💩up all day long? I have noticed that people do it on podcasts especially if the person they talk about is dead........
So you don’t believe in the story he shares about his mother contemplating mortality most of her life due to her Cancer diagnosis. Your judgement may be flawed I think 💭; but that’s your Opinion!!! He’s educating us in Appreciating the life we got now ; appreciating the simple things in life ; b’coz one day some day ; we’ll be all Gone 🤷🏿🤷🏿. I highly doubt that he’s putting on A performance.
I got the same performative vibe from him and I was just listening… he’s a bit much, blaming the judge for letting him win and how many times he had to repeat “I was just doing my job!” Then saying the system failed that abused woman and in the next breath saying he has to trust the system. Yikes. I’m outta here after the first 15 minutes.
I love James. I've watched so many podcasts with him. His outlook aligns so closely with mine. I am very fortunate to have an ex-husband I get along great with and our kids are better for it. We've honestly worked harder being great co-parents than we did being partners in marriage. Which is unfortunate that we didn't see that at the time. But I am so so grateful that we found our friendship again through the rubble of our broken marriage.
Same here. He just spoke out on all the muddled thoughts I have circulating in my head on a daily basis. We get to a certain age where we experience loss, some heavier than others, and it can be difficult to try and understand it all.
I agree with you. I found it easier to re-build the friendship outside of our marriage, than within it. Also, a longshot and slightly creepy of me to ask, but I feel like we've spoken before... Kalina is that you? If not, I'm sorry. Your profile reminds me of someone I used to talk to.
So glad you had him back. I really enjoy his forthrightness, intelligence, and passion. People need to know it's okay to be unmarried! It's great if you have a wonderful marriage, but it's also great to be happily single. We don't receive the "happily single" message much in our culture, though. James puts critical thinking behind the proposition of marriage, questioning the default response we're brainwashed to have about what happily ever after looks like. A conversation between Steven and James is gold. Thanks, guys!
Man I could listen to this guy ALL day, just so much wisdom and experience oozing from James that I always walk away with a more understanding of life and myself. Love him!
Re Jame's suggestion: Forty odd years ago, after our first anniversary dinner, I suggested a walk along the beach and during that walk I set forth the idea to make this a yearly check in, by sharing a few things that annoyed us and a few things we appreciated about each other. I thought this was very grown up and a way to keep in touch with how each of us was feeling. Unfortunately, my husband was horrified and shut me down so fast we ended up fighting. Needless to say the marriage did not survive despite going on to have three children. It obviously requires both partners to be open enough to hear good and uncomfortable truths about themselves and how to offer that to in exchange. Moral of the story - choose wisely. 🙏 to your guest. I feel, at last, validated in what I was hoping to achieve and wish others more success than i had.
Agreed. Steven is great bc he lets people talk. I hope Steven didn't let this guy talk him out of getting married bc he never addressed the 42% who actually stay married and presumably are happy. Why does he assume Steven will fall into the 58%? If you're worried, get a prenup. If ur not worried, get a prenup. Sometimes u gotta take risks in life.
After Diary of CEO it’s really difficult to listen to podcasts with guests as just often yap and interrupt, and insert a million filler words and hums. I can’t unnotice that. Steven is an excellent host and lets his guests take the stage.
@@motogirlz101I thought the same, but I reminded myself that Steven is a great host because he listens to understand, and he hears a TON of different opinions that he may or may not agree with, and all spoken by people who are very passionate and experienced in their fields. I assume hosts like him have a great ability to compartmentalize and set internal boundaries to not let a guest’s opinion change their beliefs and values.
A divorce attorney with a heart! I didn't think that was possible. Always impressed with James' eloquent human insights and life wisdom, spoken with occasional inconvenient unfettered truth but with noble and kind intentions.
The fact that he has a HEART makes him more dangerous if hes your opponent because if his HEART is in his client's case, he'll feel divine justice for tearing your ass open legally. 😂
I've just found James Sexton. He is saying everything that resonates with me. He has earned much wisdom that is needed for many ears to hear. Thank you James! He is incredibly timeless and down to earth and relevant. I would love to be friends!
My parents have a successful 37 year marraige. Selecting well is definitely number one, and someone on the same level as you as far as values and goals. They both worked alot growing up but what kept their relationship going I think was all the projects they did together. Restoring our victorian era house to magazine quality, building gardens, working on rental properties and they don't get distracted by other people and spending tons of time going out etc. The momentum built generational wealth, they saw a bigger picture than just day to day pleasure.
@@Martin-rh7mf y the rental is recent within the past two years. It's a cottage so it’s the painting the decorating and hearing about people enjoying their stay is what it’s about for them. Working on a project together then seeing the fruit of it. I’m sure if it was a residential property It would be more of a headache.
@Ch33t4h ah, I see. Yes, there's a vast difference. The cottage story is better 🏡 That it's more recent, too, instead of the houses being prioritised over a healthy upbringing/ happy home
I'm a hospice nurse going through a divorce and WOW. James is totally captivating. His energy and everything he says very much resonates, from openness about death to his Zen quotes. This is a VERY intriguing convo. Thank you.
The keys to a happy marriage are making sure spending time with your wife is a top priority. Also making sure you selected well to begin with- connection >lust. Also never forget to keep up the things you did to win over your spouse in the beginning .
sounds life happy wife happy life bs. how about just finding a woman that has morals and values. it's not a man's job to play into a woman's follies. a man's job is to provide and protect.
Yeah but providing means giving a lot of ur money, nah mate don’t do that…. Yous are a team, we all work now, believe it or not…. Women work too!! Hahahaha so guess what?? Yes we can buy them things but they can do this too, yes!! We can shout dinner or gifts, etc but they can too!!!
I love hearing his way of thinking. He’s probably my favorite guest of yours. He instantly brings everyone back down to earth and brings gratitude and love.
James insights on relationships and marriage have seriously changed my whole perspective. As a young woman who isn’t married, I didn’t expect a divorce lawyer to have such an impact, but the way he breaks things down is just incredible. I’ve watched a lot of interview he’s done and am devouring his book-his wisdom is something I can’t get enough of. Honestly, it’s time for James to have his own podcast! Whether it’s solo or even just a quick 10-minute episode, I’d be all in. So grateful there’s a second interview-just hoping for way more of him in the future! 🥰
@@marnevantonder83 True, a divorce lawyer isn’t a marriage expert, but here’s why I find James Sexton’s advice priceless: his insights go way beyond divorce. He talks about gratitude, real appreciation for the little things, and making sure your partner feels valued daily-like leaving a small note or noticing their efforts. He emphasizes healthy communication, avoiding those sitcom-style complaints to friends, and resolving issues directly instead of letting resentment build. In his stories, even small things-like the ‘BJ’s and granola’ story-show how neglecting tiny gestures can start chipping away at a marriage long before any downfall. He isn’t telling us how to be married; he’s sharing what makes them break down and reminding us how vital these small acts of love are to keep them strong. That’s the kind of advice everyone in a relationship can benefit from, married or not. I am just a fan of his insights tbh. 🌸🌸
@@havealavalyday543 he deals with broken marriages, not good ones. He doesn't know what the good ones look like. He himself is divorced and doesn't necessarily believe in marriage.
Wow! I had so much stuff to do this morning but I sat down to watch this with my morning coffee and just couldn’t stop! This chap is so interesting, charismatic and insightful! I’m going through a divorce just now and so much resonated, but mostly I just kept listening because he’s a fascinating and inspiring human being
The duality of the person this guy genuinely is and the profession he found himself in is wild. He refers to himself as a weapon, a chainsaw. But on the other side of the coin is one of the most thoughtful, intelligent and intentionally speaking person I’ve heard in so long. It’s a confusing dichotomy but I’m here for every second.
Wow, this lawyer is on a whole different level! His expressive mimics and gestures, along with his deep level of awareness, kept me hooked. So much wisdom and life experience is thrown at us. I couldn’t stop watching!
Oof. I almost burst into tears. I lost my rescue a few years ago and my boyfriend at the time got me a new pup immediately after. It was a dog he knew I always wanted, but I couldn’t believe him. I loved my rescue Bella deeply. Losing her really broke my heart. I thought I was betraying her by having Coco. Fast forward to today, my Coco is glued to me & I love her so much! I would have never had HER had I not lost Bella. It’s bittersweet and tough to explain, but it’s life.
He is right about social media. People who usually post their Happy Life really are not happy, this goes for marriage, wealth, or success. They are not getting their dopamine and are looking for other people to reach out to compliment them. These photos are usually to convince themselves more than anything.
This is crazy because I only found the original interview last week (and subsequently this channel) and there's already a follow up! Incredible content as ever. I very much appreciate hearing James's point of view about divorce and loss and love. So very refreshing from someone with years worth of experience. Thank you for another great interview!
It's just so enjoyable to listen to James gush about the things he loves and to hear the emotions in his voice regarding challenging situations he's faces. Such a passionate storyteller. Fabulous content. Great Life Lessons. Thank you!
He is ABSOLUTELY right…!! Getting a child and raising it is the most dangerous thing you can do to your relationship! This has a massive impact on your relationship or marriage… make sure that both sides are aware of that. I wasn’t… and now our son shares the fate of all divorce-kids… even if he is a lucky kid today.
Absolutely value James for his views. This man for a divorce specialist knows the important aspects of love. Thank you James for your input on the world
11:11 The story Mr. Sexton shared which broke his heart, toward the end he said it was not a good day, and that he might not believe in his clients but that he has to believe in the system. He also said that the victim of his client who was poor should not have lost. but like, poor people are typically targets of those who have more resources, more money. Thats a systemic flaw. As I understand it it is incredibly hard to have a good outcome in these scenarios of perpetrator vs, under resourced, abused, survivor who is also a co-parent. Ive heard it argued that the system keeps the system this way. I hope this guy becomes inspired to advocate for a change to the system he says he has to believe in.
I exclusively use UA-cam as my”social media” resource, and I have to say pretty much every content creator asks/pleas for likes and subscribing. Mostly it is rather annoying especially when they repeat the ask throughout the vid. YOU, however, I hit like and subscribe on my first watch. I usually take a few episodes to decide about a channel, but I knew right away you are a quality content facilitator. Someone who lets others shine in his presence and actually brings the better light out. You seem to be a kind, compassionate man, a very intuitive interviewer. You also seem to “read the room” well. You listen to your audience. You care about your content. It feels very personal to me. Not that my opinion matters, but in general, I see so many people only comment when something is wrong. I like to take notice when something is right! Well done.
“I’m a lawyer” would be such an understatement of an intro if you were to meet this man. Best guest ever on this show. Chainsaw in one hand, beautiful flower in the other and loving it both.
I learned that the only person you will have a relationship with your entire life is yourself. You need to do everything you can to preserve that relationship. If you lose that, you can say goodbye to all your other relationships. Whether it's your partner, children, parents, etc. you need to make your relationship with yourself the #1 focus. People tend to lose that focus, and then it weakens their relationship with others.
Wow. James just put into words what I could never express. Whenever I was having relationship problems I would go & get my hair cut!!! I realized this, when I was probably 26. I would do anything to not feel myself. I’m 64 now & have better coping skills. I cut my own hair too. Any person who is considering a relationship or marriage should be required to listen & watch James Sexton!! Not kidding here! Great conversation ✌️ It never occurred to me that other people did this!!!
This guy is entertaining for sure, everything he says is so true and relatable, divorce lawyer must be the best profession as you'll never run out of work!!
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, steve_porassss_. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
No #1 relationship advisor .. can point out truths speaker .. And his name is also *JAMES SEXTON*.. he’s really very intelligent .. & we all .. can learn lots from this man .. he’s so Truthful and fun to listen to ..
Divorce is oh so painful. As with childbirth a woman will ( usually) say at the most painful part “ I’m never wanting to do that ever again “ But…. We DO do it again and again. We have a strange relationship with emotional pain .
I'm favoured only God knows how much I praise Him, 2021 was a year I literally lived it. I cashed in my life savings and gave it all away. My total giving amounted to 30,000 dollars. Everyone thought I was delusional. Today, 1 receive 75,000 dollars every two months. I have a property in Calabasas, CA, and travel a lot. God has promoted me more than once and opened doors for me to live beyond my dreams. God kept to his promises to and for me
This guy spoke for around 3 hours and started with what is considered controversial about his statement. Yet after three hours, the host still finds a need to open it up. It's absolutely brilliant. I'm not sure if he is a psychiatrist, psychologist, or lawyer. Amazing guy learnt a lot with great execution of thoughts.
I so needed this episode after getting separated, with children involved. This episode reminds me that life has to be taken with humour and lightness to overcome difficult moments. Thank you❤
Thank you Steven for bringing him back❤ The previous episode with him was your best podcast ever this guy is awesome on so many levels, cannot wait to watch!!
I have learned sooo... much in this podcast and realized how naive we are about relationships and jumps into marraiges with beeing with this idea of everything will workout fine .🤔😏 This was truly the most sensable teaching about life as it should be. I hope this man opens a school to teach people about humanity in truth and wisdom to make families holesame and meaningfull. GREAT STUFF.!!
Literally opened my phone in the morning and this is what I love to see on my video uploads updates 😅 this guest was one of the best guests in the history of internet ever last time so I am super excited and very thankful already being 2 mins in 😊😊😊
Best channel on UA-cam, hands down! Interesting guests and good host, lots of thoughts provoking conversations. Big thank you to the team behind these videos, you are all amazing!
I can't help but fall more in love 😍with this guy every time I hear him speak. He's wicked intelligent, an independent thinker (which I absolutely love), compassionate & passionate (love that too), insightful, wise, in touch with his feelings, articulate, and nice to look at too lol. I have always believed in life partnership but questioned marriage and I feel validated every time I listen to James. Thank you Steven for having James on and for the quality content that you guys created🤗. I will definitely be looking for the book! 🤓
Please don't allow your emotions to become so naive. Your gushing over someone you don't know and I'm sorry to say but females of this mindset are usually suseptible to falling for the wrong men because they are easily played.
My wife and I were poor when we got married. We did a potluck dinner for the party. It was way more amazing than we ever could have imagined. This was after the gas pipes for heating froze in the main chamber of the church so we got married in the community room with Ring Pop wedding bands, which were carried by my autistic stepson who had a meltdown because his little sister was nervous and didn't throw the pedals out of the basket in our attempt to have a "normal" which was hilariously emotional and fun. I fully support alternative weddings/parties.
The couple holding hands and simply walking side by side, is the feeling of enoughness, contentment in the present moment without expectations, commitment without attachment to an outcome In one word HAPPINESS. Seeking pleasure in the future and runnin away from the past vs just being content and happy in the now.
My ex thought contentment was stagnancy while contentment is my main goal in life. Happiness is a pretty transient situational emotion while contentment is stable.
Thanks. I needed this. I've never met a man with an perspective so ridiculously close to mine. I started thinking I'm the freak with no place in this world with my opinion about marriage and love. Almost crying seeing in comments how many people actually agree with that.
In my view, marriage is the most lovely and dangerous trip we can go on. Its like taking a ship into the ocean, we must learning every day how to navigate despite whatever weather looks like. Sometimes, we just need a strong pray when storms come and let it be. Unfortunately, so many ships will sink, even though they had the best sailors, and some of them will reach the coast alone, while others still in pairs.
I needed this podcast. Had to break up with my girlfriend and I needed to hear that it’s ok, I was just the one that ended it. Neither one of us was happy and it had to end. Thank you DOAC
After watching, I think now that marriage ONLY makes sense WITH a prenup, bc a marriage is a contract, an agreement to unite as a team to benefit each other mutually, and like any contract or agreement, clear expectations of each members role should be defined and what will happen if these expectations are not met. If anything, this would increase accountability. They should really require a whole prenup meeting prior to issuing a marriage license. It would definitely reduce divorce rates and make sure people were compatible on values prior to getting married. humans are imperfect; we all know this. We also a feel differently about different types of mistakes, which is totally fine. But should be agreed upon within that marriage.
9 out of 10 couples I know are divorced, separated, in the process of, or should be... but in denial, or staying together for $$$ or for their kids (sounds like torture for everyone).
Don’t stay together for money reasons. If the sex is over it’s over. Do each of yourselves a favor and help the other get someone new. Time is short in life and opportunities go by so quickly, but tragedies become more regular. You will still be connected to each other like it or not, but if the other spouse can handle tragedies in their life that will be better for you.
I am a product of parents that should have divorced a mil years ago, it damaged my siblings & I in different ways. I knew I never wanted to get married nor have kids since I was a child. My siblings made other choices, which they are struggling to deal with. Generational trauma, rinse and repeat.
The first time I ran into this channel was with James first interview with Steven. Since then I’ve been a hardcore fan of this channel and James. This 2nd interview brought me great joy and I wish this man nothing but happiness and grace!
Hello James. I’m a childrens’ hospice nurse and the whole topic of endings is really big for me, so thank you for talking about it. But I have to say: when you were talking about successfully defending an abusive pimp I got so angry with you! How could you have excepted that case! Then I started advocating for you, after you had mentioned being part of a system. And it made me realise that same for the nurses. Who ever comes, we provide help and care. Terrorist or rapist. Then let another system deal with them. Thank you again. Looking forward to reading your book.
I felt the same way. And thought, he didn't need to take the case. And why would he want to defend a pimp anyway?! Your situation is different as a nurse, you don't get to say whether or not you want to treat a patient. Anyway, I'm only a few minutes into the interview. Maybe I will change my thoughts.
@ @ I asked because although not a very similar thing happened to me, it was the same outcome. I was injured by doctors in a major U.S. hospital, leading to the death of my unborn child and organ failure. The hospital brought sophisticated lawyers and medical experts who purposely lied and freed the hospital and doctors and their staff. I didn't have money to hire sophisticated lawyers, nor the energy to seek one, as I was sick and on dialysis. Still suffering as a result, and the hospital and doctors got away with it just because some lawyers chose to go with the system and love for money. I was born in a foreign country, and the hospital hired doctors from the country I was born to lie. This doctor never took care of me, but she pretended to know exactly what happened to me. I agree with you that he knew and still did it and should have followed the ethics of maleficence and benevolence, although he seems like a nice person Professionals who have jobs with public trust should always be truthful and do no harm or keep a blind eye to the harm of others
Thank you for guesting him again in your show❤ He is one of my most favorites! Full of wisdom, love for life, and at the same time so much understanding and respect for death and endings❤
How adorable Steve looked while asking James all those questions about life with a child like curiosity! I'm sure Steve is going to be an amazing, responsible dad & a loving husband to his wife! And James....what can i say about this charming man! He gives me an impression of a soul mate from my past life! Please stay around as long as possible! ❤
Oh, the gift a good interviewer!!! (Who asks a good question and just shuts up and actually let'sthe guest answer it!) A rare gift in the world of podcasts nowadays. Thank you for a great interview! (though I don't agree with some of the values of the guest).
Pardon me while I just take a sec at 38:00 and bawl my eyes out because I miss my grandma so much, and yet I'm so happy that she got to see her great-grandkids as often as I could bring them over during the last 3 1/2 years of her life. Her memorial service is this Sunday and this episode hits me right in the feels. And also again at 54:45, this episode is just full of emotional bangers.
Wonderful conversation. I loved your first interview with James. He is passionate about his work. His narration is simple yet full of wisdom and meaning. I could listen to him talk all day.
I have now watched 5 hours of interview, because this man really made me rethink very much. And im completely surprised of him not being a cold and desinterested man, but a wise and very warm one. Thank you for this!!
Very cool video A month ago, I ended a five-year relationship. My soulmate made the decision to walk away from me, and even though I've done everything in my power to get him back, I can't help but feel disappointed because I can't see my life with anyone else. I want to say that I've tried everything to stop thinking about him, but I simply can't. I miss him so much and I don't know why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
I’ve got a favour to ask! If you enjoy this, please double check that you’ve liked the video and subscribed to the channel! Thats a small way you can help us carry on doing this ❤️🙏🏾 really appreciate you!
Steven, you have spoken with so many people. Have you spoken to, and with, our father God? And our brother Jesus? 🙏🏽💟
I’ve already seen it. This is the second time you are posting it
Stevens face at those cutaways show trailers. Priceless!
Just so you know, I watch Steven but don't subscribe for quite a rubbish reason. I take care of my Mum & she watches a lot of YT but she's 88 & couldn't get the sign in & out thing so disturbingly whenever I'd go to watch my feed was full of nothing but Harry & Meghan...pages & pages & pages 🤨 dreadful! So now everyone in the house goes on YT as a Guest.
I'm subscribed on my phone but like to watch your show on the telly. I always feel guilty & like I'm nicking your show when you ask us to subscribe!
Awesome discussion
This man is my favourite guest you've had on your show. He wears his heart on his sleeve. Absolutely gorgeous human being!
soulful
so true! gorgeous!
I agree with you completely. His face says it all. I wish more humans could express themselves like him.
And absolutely brilliant
Agreed!!!
Fellow divorce attorney here (Pennsylvania and New Jersey). So much of what James is saying about marriage, divorce, and relationships is spot on. I’m really happy there is a platform to get the message out directly from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Great video!
Many of the comments you have posted on a lot of other channels have been great, and thanks for your time, and input you put into commenting!
@ Thank you very much!
If a party motivation to marriage is a better life, I can see why there is no interest for a prenup.
First saw him on Soft White Underbelly 🤍
Divorce is money making business. Why get married? Why don’t you just live together without a label of married or belonging to someone? If you decide to have children why don’t they (2 people) sign a memo of understanding for both to raise that chid or children & have it notarized and presented to justice of peace for a binding contract? Too much nonsense in marriage when two people fall apart. Lawyers like it bc they’re the only one benefit. If you do not agree, proof yourself wrong. Thank you very much.
He is so right. My parents have been married for 29 years and they loved us so much but they were not overly obsessed with their children. They prioritized their relationship, personal identities, careers, and travels together to be the best parents they could be. I love that I still get to have happily married parents to this day ♥️
That is a true blessing❤
My husband and I prioritize each other over our kids. This looks different in different homes. It means sometimes kids' baths are rushed, and sometimes a bedtime story is brief. Sometimes, they don't get to go to the park. He does shift work, and we prioritize time with each other when we can. We've noticed something. Our kids are happy and healthy ❤️. They are growing up in a home with parents who know each other well, spend time together and are heads over heels for each other. Our home's atmosphere is loving and peaceful. There's something ordinary yet magical about that.
That is beautiful!!! 😻 #goals
SPOT ON!!!! So why the kids are brats ending up with divorced parents fighting over the kids. Kids see divided parents like a shark smells blood in the water and use it to their full advantage. Because THEY’RE THE KIDS who need united PARENTS teaching them the proper order of things. Failure to do this often leads to grown kids who disdain one or both parents who then estrange them.
Agreed. We prioritize each other first so there’s plenty of times when we tell the kids to go to bed at 7pm when their bedtime is 9:30pm 😁
Agreed!
That's what happens when a good man knows he's her #1. When a guy is expected to do everything to support her and the family but gets nothing in return, the only thing that is built is resentment.
My husband and i talked before getting married ,we both asked each other if we would prioritise our children above each other. when they were young. We wrote the answer down on a piece of paper and handed it to each other. We both had written YES and we did. He said he couldnt marry someone who wouldnt put our children first and i agreed.We had 35 yrs together before became terminally ill with cancer,it was my and my childrens priviledge to nurse him to the end.I asked him if he regretted anything in his life ,he said no.I think the issue is wether you agree on what your priorities will be.
I agree and when kids get bigger it's the husband's turn
I have a co worker whom he & his wife prioritized their children first they been married for 45years & he said that’s his only regret, because him & his wife barely know each other they changed over the years, the kids are grown and out the house and barely come visit them
I listened to the podcast… did i miss something or was it one of those “read in between the lines” kind of thing? I don’t remember him saying (and tied even relistening to certain areas) “if kids are your top priority, you’ll divorce “.
My take-away was feeding your kids the illusion that he talks about.
I know, and have listened to, many podcasts with Jordan Peterson and he’s a strong advocate for long term marriage. Has some VERY strong arguments for it, too. And if you take Sexton’s “the wisdom you find is the one you bring up bring up there” the same issues can follow from one relationship to another unless you work through them. Maybe working through them with the partner you have children with is the solution. But i do understand it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. Every relationship is unique with it own individual challenges.
@@Shiria.jYes, that almost always happens when a spouse is last, after all the children.
@nicolegarceau9610 Whoever labeled the podcast insinuated it. In any case, it's a common problem. When the kids grow up and leave home, many marriage partners find they are nearly strangers, because they've thrown all their attention at the kids for 20 years. At this point, many married people decide to split. They have failed to provide an example to their own children of how to maintain love relationship with a spouse.
This man is a philosopher who poses as a VERY VERY GOOD ATTORNEY. lol like his depth and even the way the pitch of his voice switches back and forth has such raw vulnerable honesty. I love this
Marriage slippage is a term that refers to a gradual decline in the quality of a marital relationship over time. It often happens subtly and may involve reduced emotional connection, communication, intimacy, or general engagement between partners. Causes can range from daily life stresses, lack of communication, unmet expectations, or changes in priorities. Without intentional effort to reconnect and address these changes, the relationship may feel strained or distant, though not necessarily ending in separation or divorce.
Thank you!! I hate these cliffhangers this channel has
Okay, chatgpt. This paragraph reads exactly like the answers chat gpt gives me.
@@graciousSenorbut is it on point?
Thank you! Saved me time from having to watch the entire video. ❤
The video talks about slippage at 1:15:20
I am planning a wedding right now for my fiance and I. I became so stressed out when I was trying to do it the "traditional" way, then I threw all of that away and started planning around what WE would want. I am planning the fanciest pizza party anyone has ever been to! Keeping the budget low, and giving space for us to have fun with the people we love most.
Love it 😊
Good for you!
Congrats ! Brilliant ! All the best : )
I'd say I am happy to make your pizza for you, but I probably live too far away.
Probably the best thing ever ; starting A marriage with Financial stress isn’t a good thing either . The total cost of weddings is absolutely outrageous lately ; it’s lovely to see Couples who are prioritizing what’s best for the two of them Vs taking advice from family or Spending more 🤑 than you initially wanted 💯💯!!! Always follow your intuition !! Best of luck on ya wedding & wishing you two success in your Marriage.
This one took me by surprise. I expected to hear about divorce, the process, the mistakes, etc. Instead I sat with tears welling up as James spoke about death and dying. I also learned his mother had leiomyosarcoma. I also have this very rare cancer and have been dealing with it since 2020. I'm Stage 4. Statistically, I'm not supposed to be alive. Thank you James for sharing your stories and perspective. I live in joy and try to 'soften' when things are difficult. Thank you DOAC team for this episode.
God bless you
@hollyhansomsvillage Blessings to you. It’s a miracle youve made it 4yrs. Wishing you peace, comfort, love. Will say a prayer for you. I hope you’re having a good day today. ☮️ Take care.
A sister of mine had leiomyosarcoma~ a spindle cell sarcoma ~ her cancer occurred due to tp53 genetic mutation (which is also called Li Fraumeni syndrome). Turned out this genetic mutation is in our family lineage so then all family were tested to see who else had the genetic mutation. During my sister’s first surgery, she had full hysterectomy, removal of her omentum connective tissue, part of her colon, and bits/pieces off an adrenal gland…. The docs tried to get as large of margins as possible. Anyway, wishing you much strength and all the best.
Sorry to hear that.
As you have nothing to lose and as you still enjoy life, maybe go full carnivore, miracles.happen (Dr Berry, Dr Chafee, etc etc ).
With love.
I watch his first interview with James yesterday. I have seen it on my feed for at least a week before I watched it. I thought it was just something from the menasphere community. Man was it amazing interview and nothing what I expected it to be
Same i was surprised. My mom is going through brain cancer right now after having lung cancer. This is what I needed to hear right now. Thanks for this episode.
He is so enjoyable to watch. Very animated, spunky and articulate, brilliant.
The hands ;)
I enjoyed his ideas, but his energy is very stressful to me.
@@slenderforgood Yes 😊 for me to...I had to pause the video a couple of times
The energy isn't stressful for me, I like melodrama and wild gesticulations. 🎭
@@Emanuella166Really? Just watching him made you have to pause?
"Love is a delusion brought on by inadequate lighting" damn that's profound. I swear this guy speaks in lyrics. I could listen to him all day.
Desire is. Not love.
@@olive4naito duh
i was literally just wondering how he speaks so eloquently, maybe from reading a lot but idk lol it'd be cool to be this nice to listen to
Because he literally said some lyrics. “Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.” Semisonic - closing time
Presbyopia ✨
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
Parting with someone you love is always a challenging process, but in my experience, I had the guidance of a spiritual guide who prevented my marriage from collapsing. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I promise you will not regret it
Challenges... yes, but not abuse. This man's first story was about a pimp viciously attacking the mother of his children.
Do the housework, bills and the shopping. And any maintenance including repairs you can. @GodfreyKelz
Love this comment!!💞 Please don't miss out on your perfect one..because of this opinion. It's exactly that an opinion. Especially the part on marraige is dangerous.
This made me cry so much. Thank you. This was life changing experience. I went through the divorce with one husband and I went through the death with the second. I never knew I need to hear this, but now I am looking back to my life differently. The talk about death change my life perspective so much. I am forcing everyone who I love, to watch this interview. Amazing!!!
This man has really changed my opinion on what I thought divorce lawyers were all like. He's got such a huge heart. I've been married almost 9 years now and going strong. I don't claim to be an expert on marriage at all lol but I can say me and my hubby prioritize each other even though we have 4 kids and we don't forget that it was us two in the beginning that started this family.
How? My kids are little time bandits. (I’m also a stay at home mom), I don’t even get to sleep without one of them or both of them on my side of the bed. In 6 years we’ve had like 12-13 dates without the kids. I’m the one who makes every meal, does every bath, gets them dressed, takes them to school, clean when they leave. How do ppl not fall into this.
@@trevnti We've got 4 kids and we've never let them sleep in our bed so it's just not something they even want to do or think about at all. And I do all of that stuff too during the week when my hubby works but on weekends he pitches in and helps me out. We've had a system for years now (his idea) that on weekends we split up the days so that both of us get to relax. I do breakfast with the kids and lunch while he relaxes in the bedroom with his video games, then in the evening he does dinner and everything after with the kids while I get to relax in the bedroom reading and watching UA-cam (which I'm doing right now lol). Yeah some weekends there's too much going on to pull it off, but most weekends are chill and we manage. It makes both of us happier and more appreciative of the other when we can have that relax time to ourselves. Then when the kids are in their beds asleep, we have our adult time. The smaller kids (7 and 8) go to bed at 9 and the teens stay in their rooms anyways so we get a couple hours of alone time before bed. You just have to set up systems to make it work!
Well said
@@madsquishy3410you are a very thoughtful couple, congrats, it’s good to see parents working as a good and efficient team, really insightful and inspiring 🧚🏼♀️
You guys made that choice to have only 12 dates in 6 years. Its your job to get the babies to a sitter and budget for it if not and there are budget constraints then at least do dates at home when the kids are asleep and dont let the kids run you you have to change your whole family dynamic for it to work
Love his quote that love is loaned , not permanently gifted. He's such an amazing and interesting person.
He is not an ordinary lawyer because he is a man with a heart of gold 💛 characterized with a very enrich life experience.
@@F16wing I think the reason he is so smart is he is divorced and never remarried. Most idiots remarry and make the same mistake over and over again.
Of course you'd love it.
I love James Sexton. He's so wise, charismatic and genuine. Pure joy to watch and listen to!
She's a great lawyer and very soulful. Despite being trans, she really took me by surprise about how serious she is and doesn't even make reverence to her trans identity. She's a great role model
I think James is by far my favorite guest on any podcast. His eloquence, his wit, his sense of humor - coupled with a wonderful depth of wisdom and live experience. So happy this conversation was as long as it was; it felt like it blew by in 1 hour. \
What book is he talking about here? Do you have a clue?
This lawyer has a degree in psycholgy. He is also an excellent performer. He is acting all the time. His body language, his voice, the way he uses his gestures, he is amazing. He even cries. The perfect combination to be a succesful lawyer in the US.
Yes I got that. Definitely. Reminds me of Michael Douglas when he was younger 😮
I read this and for the rest of the interview I saw Cluster B. It's amazing how personalities matches careers perfectly.
@@tatatat-vm9dl I was married to a guy like this. He could cry on queue. Sometimes had me believing it but deep down I was sceptical. However because I didn't fake cry I thought other people didn't. My life has been filled with fake liars. I believed them. I didn't realise people just make 💩up all day long?
I have noticed that people do it on podcasts especially if the person they talk about is dead........
So you don’t believe in the story he shares about his mother contemplating mortality most of her life due to her Cancer diagnosis. Your judgement may be flawed I think 💭; but that’s your Opinion!!! He’s educating us in Appreciating the life we got now ; appreciating the simple things in life ; b’coz one day some day ; we’ll be all Gone 🤷🏿🤷🏿. I highly doubt that he’s putting on A performance.
I got the same performative vibe from him and I was just listening… he’s a bit much, blaming the judge for letting him win and how many times he had to repeat “I was just doing my job!” Then saying the system failed that abused woman and in the next breath saying he has to trust the system. Yikes. I’m outta here after the first 15 minutes.
I love James. I've watched so many podcasts with him. His outlook aligns so closely with mine. I am very fortunate to have an ex-husband I get along great with and our kids are better for it. We've honestly worked harder being great co-parents than we did being partners in marriage. Which is unfortunate that we didn't see that at the time. But I am so so grateful that we found our friendship again through the rubble of our broken marriage.
This gives me hope! Thank you!
Same here. He just spoke out on all the muddled thoughts I have circulating in my head on a daily basis. We get to a certain age where we experience loss, some heavier than others, and it can be difficult to try and understand it all.
I agree with you. I found it easier to re-build the friendship outside of our marriage, than within it.
Also, a longshot and slightly creepy of me to ask, but I feel like we've spoken before... Kalina is that you? If not, I'm sorry. Your profile reminds me of someone I used to talk to.
@@myself2861 Sorry, I'm not Kalina! Maybe we've crossed paths in the comments section before?!
I always wonder how two people great co parent but could not do it when were married. ... 😕
I thought I would dislike him but I loved him ❤
Loved his honesty, intelligence, vulnerability and how loving he seems!
Such a great interview.
So glad you had him back. I really enjoy his forthrightness, intelligence, and passion. People need to know it's okay to be unmarried! It's great if you have a wonderful marriage, but it's also great to be happily single. We don't receive the "happily single" message much in our culture, though. James puts critical thinking behind the proposition of marriage, questioning the default response we're brainwashed to have about what happily ever after looks like. A conversation between Steven and James is gold. Thanks, guys!
Life is a game and you can win. Winning is staying true to yourself and being happy
Man I could listen to this guy ALL day, just so much wisdom and experience oozing from James that I always walk away with a more understanding of life and myself. Love him!
Same!!! He's brilliant, articulate and much more!
If you like listening to him, you will love “Meditation” by Marcus Aurelius, a brilliant Stoic philosopher and Roman emperor.
Re Jame's suggestion: Forty odd years ago, after our first anniversary dinner, I suggested a walk along the beach and during that walk I set forth the idea to make this a yearly check in, by sharing a few things that annoyed us and a few things we appreciated about each other. I thought this was very grown up and a way to keep in touch with how each of us was feeling. Unfortunately, my husband was horrified and shut me down so fast we ended up fighting. Needless to say the marriage did not survive despite going on to have three children. It obviously requires both partners to be open enough to hear good and uncomfortable truths about themselves and how to offer that to in exchange. Moral of the story - choose wisely. 🙏 to your guest. I feel, at last, validated in what I was hoping to achieve and wish others more success than i had.
Steven, you are a wonderful host. You allow your guests to speak and you ask great questions that get the best out of them. Congratulations!
Agreed. Steven is great bc he lets people talk. I hope Steven didn't let this guy talk him out of getting married bc he never addressed the 42% who actually stay married and presumably are happy. Why does he assume Steven will fall into the 58%? If you're worried, get a prenup. If ur not worried, get a prenup. Sometimes u gotta take risks in life.
After Diary of CEO it’s really difficult to listen to podcasts with guests as just often yap and interrupt, and insert a million filler words and hums. I can’t unnotice that. Steven is an excellent host and lets his guests take the stage.
@@motogirlz101I thought the same, but I reminded myself that Steven is a great host because he listens to understand, and he hears a TON of different opinions that he may or may not agree with, and all spoken by people who are very passionate and experienced in their fields. I assume hosts like him have a great ability to compartmentalize and set internal boundaries to not let a guest’s opinion change their beliefs and values.
A divorce attorney with a heart! I didn't think that was possible. Always impressed with James' eloquent human insights and life wisdom, spoken with occasional inconvenient unfettered truth but with noble and kind intentions.
Of course it is.
With a heart? But he continues to represent that pimp? He’s already rich and could be representing the poor.
The fact that he has a HEART makes him more dangerous if hes your opponent because if his HEART is in his client's case, he'll feel divine justice for tearing your ass open legally. 😂
I've just found James Sexton. He is saying everything that resonates with me. He has earned much wisdom that is needed for many ears to hear. Thank you James! He is incredibly timeless and down to earth and relevant. I would love to be friends!
My parents have a successful 37 year marraige. Selecting well is definitely number one, and someone on the same level as you as far as values and goals.
They both worked alot growing up but what kept their relationship going I think was all the projects they did together. Restoring our victorian era house to magazine quality, building gardens, working on rental properties and they don't get distracted by other people and spending tons of time going out etc. The momentum built generational wealth, they saw a bigger picture than just day to day pleasure.
My parents stayed together & acquired rental properties.
Your story sounds idyllic. My experience in the process was the opposite.
@@Martin-rh7mf y the rental is recent within the past two years. It's a cottage so it’s the painting the decorating and hearing about people enjoying their stay is what it’s about for them. Working on a project together then seeing the fruit of it. I’m sure if it was a residential property It would be more of a headache.
@Ch33t4h ah, I see. Yes, there's a vast difference. The cottage story is better 🏡 That it's more recent, too, instead of the houses being prioritised over a healthy upbringing/ happy home
Example of adage: two persons, in order to have a successful marriage, must have a shared vision down the road
@@judithholder2537ya nailed it 🎯
This guy could be talking about anything and I'd watch/listen. James Sexton is a gem!
I always learn so much from him ! I am married, and I like listening to stuff that can help us, things that we never taught about. I just love this !
This guy said some of the most profound things. Thank you for inviting him on your podcast 😊
The amount of life wisdom this guy has is unbelievable
This lawyer is something. Skilled, experienced, delightful speaker, witty, funny and compassionate
James is my favorite lawyer of all-time next to Harvey Specter.
I'm a hospice nurse going through a divorce and WOW. James is totally captivating. His energy and everything he says very much resonates, from openness about death to his Zen quotes. This is a VERY intriguing convo. Thank you.
Look after yourself.
Sorry you are through a divorce. I'm going through divorce myself for the second time. Just know that with time it does get easier.
The keys to a happy marriage are making sure spending time with your wife is a top priority. Also making sure you selected well to begin with- connection >lust. Also never forget to keep up the things you did to win over your spouse in the beginning .
sounds life happy wife happy life bs. how about just finding a woman that has morals and values. it's not a man's job to play into a woman's follies. a man's job is to provide and protect.
Yeah but providing means giving a lot of ur money, nah mate don’t do that…. Yous are a team, we all work now, believe it or not…. Women work too!! Hahahaha so guess what?? Yes we can buy them things but they can do this too, yes!! We can shout dinner or gifts, etc but they can too!!!
@@g3nj1 no. It’s about treating your woman very well and making her a priority. Likewise, she does the same for you.
Like a Stockholm syndrome....
Well said! Quality time, connection and attention, working to keep the attraction up and never stopping to make the same effort as in the beginning ❤
I love hearing his way of thinking. He’s probably my favorite guest of yours. He instantly brings everyone back down to earth and brings gratitude and love.
I never thought a lawyer can be such an authentic person.
Lawyers are human too. (I should say some or maybe that should be good!😂).
An outlier don't fool yourself. 😂
All these people taken in by him. It’s so funny
In the courtroom he's probably a demon, so outside of it, he's an angel
James insights on relationships and marriage have seriously changed my whole perspective. As a young woman who isn’t married, I didn’t expect a divorce lawyer to have such an impact, but the way he breaks things down is just incredible. I’ve watched a lot of interview he’s done and am devouring his book-his wisdom is something I can’t get enough of. Honestly, it’s time for James to have his own podcast! Whether it’s solo or even just a quick 10-minute episode, I’d be all in. So grateful there’s a second interview-just hoping for way more of him in the future! 🥰
Just take note. A divorce expert doesn't make him a marriage expert. Would you take financial advice from a broke person?
@@marnevantonder83 True, a divorce lawyer isn’t a marriage expert, but here’s why I find James Sexton’s advice priceless: his insights go way beyond divorce. He talks about gratitude, real appreciation for the little things, and making sure your partner feels valued daily-like leaving a small note or noticing their efforts. He emphasizes healthy communication, avoiding those sitcom-style complaints to friends, and resolving issues directly instead of letting resentment build. In his stories, even small things-like the ‘BJ’s and granola’ story-show how neglecting tiny gestures can start chipping away at a marriage long before any downfall.
He isn’t telling us how to be married; he’s sharing what makes them break down and reminding us how vital these small acts of love are to keep them strong. That’s the kind of advice everyone in a relationship can benefit from, married or not. I am just a fan of his insights tbh. 🌸🌸
I hope you discover that man that you can’t imagine living without and never have to worry about a life without him. That is a win.
@@marnevantonder83you mean taking advice from a finance professional who helps broke people out.
Otherwise your analogy is not the same
@@havealavalyday543 he deals with broken marriages, not good ones. He doesn't know what the good ones look like. He himself is divorced and doesn't necessarily believe in marriage.
Wow! I had so much stuff to do this morning but I sat down to watch this with my morning coffee and just couldn’t stop! This chap is so interesting, charismatic and insightful! I’m going through a divorce just now and so much resonated, but mostly I just kept listening because he’s a fascinating and inspiring human being
The duality of the person this guy genuinely is and the profession he found himself in is wild. He refers to himself as a weapon, a chainsaw. But on the other side of the coin is one of the most thoughtful, intelligent and intentionally speaking person I’ve heard in so long. It’s a confusing dichotomy but I’m here for every second.
He's damn good at what he does😬 but he's also an empathic human 🫠
He is warning people. On the stress chart death and divorce are one and two…divorce could easily be number 1.
Wow, this lawyer is on a whole different level! His expressive mimics and gestures, along with his deep level of awareness, kept me hooked. So much wisdom and life experience is thrown at us. I couldn’t stop watching!
This is straight up to the top three of any guests that you have had on the show. What a dude!
Oof. I almost burst into tears. I lost my rescue a few years ago and my boyfriend at the time got me a new pup immediately after. It was a dog he knew I always wanted, but I couldn’t believe him. I loved my rescue Bella deeply. Losing her really broke my heart. I thought I was betraying her by having Coco. Fast forward to today, my Coco is glued to me & I love her so much! I would have never had HER had I not lost Bella. It’s bittersweet and tough to explain, but it’s life.
I. COULD. LISTEN. TO. JAMES. SEXTON. TALK. FOR. DAYS. Favourite guest!!!!
He is right about social media. People who usually post their Happy Life really are not happy, this goes for marriage, wealth, or success. They are not getting their dopamine and are looking for other people to reach out to compliment them. These photos are usually to convince themselves more than anything.
This is crazy because I only found the original interview last week (and subsequently this channel) and there's already a follow up! Incredible content as ever. I very much appreciate hearing James's point of view about divorce and loss and love. So very refreshing from someone with years worth of experience. Thank you for another great interview!
Think, “Happy Spouse,Happy House.” It’s a two way thing ! Great video guys !👌👏
This guy could be a great Hollywood actor. He has awesome expressions and acts out what he's trying to explain like a pro
It seems a little Italian, or is it just New York
I just commented that he reminds me of the small Chinese guy in the movie "the hangover"
He is just like Saul in Breaking Bad😁
He is an actor, he’s a lawyer and a narcissist.
The best lawyers are always good actors.
It's just so enjoyable to listen to James gush about the things he loves and to hear the emotions in his voice regarding challenging situations he's faces. Such a passionate storyteller. Fabulous content. Great Life Lessons. Thank you!
He is ABSOLUTELY right…!! Getting a child and raising it is the most dangerous thing you can do to your relationship! This has a massive impact on your relationship or marriage… make sure that both sides are aware of that. I wasn’t… and now our son shares the fate of all divorce-kids… even if he is a lucky kid today.
Absolutely value James for his views. This man for a divorce specialist knows the important aspects of love.
Thank you James for your input on the world
One of my favourite guests. Empathetic, reasonable, articulate, a pleasure to listen to.
11:11 The story Mr. Sexton shared which broke his heart, toward the end he said it was not a good day, and that he might not believe in his clients but that he has to believe in the system. He also said that the victim of his client who was poor should not have lost. but like, poor people are typically targets of those who have more resources, more money. Thats a systemic flaw. As I understand it it is incredibly hard to have a good outcome in these scenarios of perpetrator vs, under resourced, abused, survivor who is also a co-parent. Ive heard it argued that the system keeps the system this way. I hope this guy becomes inspired to advocate for a change to the system he says he has to believe in.
I exclusively use UA-cam as my”social media” resource, and I have to say pretty much every content creator asks/pleas for likes and subscribing. Mostly it is rather annoying especially when they repeat the ask throughout the vid.
YOU, however, I hit like and subscribe on my first watch. I usually take a few episodes to decide about a channel, but I knew right away you are a quality content facilitator. Someone who lets others shine in his presence and actually brings the better light out. You seem to be a kind, compassionate man, a very intuitive interviewer. You also seem to “read the room” well. You listen to your audience. You care about your content. It feels very personal to me.
Not that my opinion matters, but in general, I see so many people only comment when something is wrong. I like to take notice when something is right!
Well done.
I feel the exact same way. This guy is genuine and cares
You’re so right, he’s one of none!
“I’m a lawyer” would be such an understatement of an intro if you were to meet this man. Best guest ever on this show. Chainsaw in one hand, beautiful flower in the other and loving it both.
I learned that the only person you will have a relationship with your entire life is yourself. You need to do everything you can to preserve that relationship. If you lose that, you can say goodbye to all your other relationships. Whether it's your partner, children, parents, etc. you need to make your relationship with yourself the #1 focus. People tend to lose that focus, and then it weakens their relationship with others.
who knew that a sage would come to us in the form of a divorce lawyer with heavy new york accent - love this guy!
His delivery is so animated. I love watching this guy's interviews and hearing his thought processes. Always a fresh perspective
Wow. James just put into words what I could never express. Whenever I was having relationship problems I would go & get my hair cut!!!
I realized this, when I was probably 26. I would do anything to not feel myself. I’m 64 now & have better coping skills. I cut my own hair too.
Any person who is considering a relationship or marriage should be required to listen & watch James Sexton!! Not kidding here! Great conversation ✌️
It never occurred to me that other people did this!!!
This guy is entertaining for sure, everything he says is so true and relatable, divorce lawyer must be the best profession as you'll never run out of work!!
Also morticians
Met James while I was running errands over the weekend. What a kind and generous guy. Wish him the best.
I met him right after you did and he told me that he didn’t like you. 😮
@ Ha………………..Ha………………..Ha
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, steve_porassss_. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place.
Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
He's constantly talking about killing someone.
He's violent. Anyone reading this
Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
Is he on instagram?
Yes he is Steve_porassss_
His was the first DOAC interview I've ever watched, and I've been hooked ever since ❤
Same ❤
Same
Same
I LOVE LISTENING TO JAMES!!! He is so genuine and realistic.
No #1 relationship advisor .. can point out truths speaker .. And his name is also *JAMES SEXTON*.. he’s really very intelligent .. & we all .. can learn lots from this man .. he’s so Truthful and fun to listen to ..
Divorce is oh so painful. As with childbirth a woman will ( usually) say at the most painful part “ I’m never wanting to do that ever again “
But…. We DO do it again and again.
We have a strange relationship with emotional pain .
Yeah it's called reward. It's not strange is you know the meaning of that.
@@lauroandrea3241it’s not a reward, it’s sacrifice
@@lauroandrea3241No it’s a sacrifice
Seek therapy
I'm favoured only God knows how much I praise Him,
2021 was a year I literally lived it. I cashed in my life savings and gave it all away. My total giving amounted to 30,000 dollars. Everyone thought I was delusional. Today, 1 receive 75,000 dollars every two months. I have a property in Calabasas, CA, and travel a lot. God has promoted me more than once and opened doors for me to live beyond my dreams.
God kept to his promises to and for me
I’m grateful to god. After so much struggles my family is happy once again everything is finally falling into place!!
Wow that's huge, how do you make that much monthly?
I'm 37 and have been looking for ways to be successful, please how??
I earn from investing in the digital market with the guidance of (Ms. Evelyn Vera) Brokerage services. I'm happy to talk about it!!!
I remembered she opened a brokerage account with the 30k I gave her for me, it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.
This guy spoke for around 3 hours and started with what is considered controversial about his statement. Yet after three hours, the host still finds a need to open it up. It's absolutely brilliant.
I'm not sure if he is a psychiatrist, psychologist, or lawyer. Amazing guy learnt a lot with great execution of thoughts.
I so needed this episode after getting separated, with children involved. This episode reminds me that life has to be taken with humour and lightness to overcome difficult moments. Thank you❤
Thank you Steven for bringing him back❤ The previous episode with him was your best podcast ever this guy is awesome on so many levels, cannot wait to watch!!
I have learned sooo... much in this podcast and realized how naive we are about relationships and jumps into marraiges with beeing with this idea of everything will workout fine .🤔😏 This was truly the most sensable teaching about life as it should be. I hope this man opens a school to teach people about humanity in truth and wisdom to make families holesame and meaningfull. GREAT STUFF.!!
"The only zen that you find on the mountaintop is the zen you brought there." That hit deep. I'm going to borrow it
Literally opened my phone in the morning and this is what I love to see on my video uploads updates 😅 this guest was one of the best guests in the history of internet ever last time so I am super excited and very thankful already being 2 mins in 😊😊😊
yep I could listen to him for hours! Such an interesting and intelligent person
I must’ve watched hundreds of your videos over the last couple of years Steven but none have delighted me quite as much as this! Love your work!🌈💜
Best channel on UA-cam, hands down! Interesting guests and good host, lots of thoughts provoking conversations. Big thank you to the team behind these videos, you are all amazing!
One of my favourite guests! Love his conversations, his views and how he articulates everything. Another great conversation. I hope you have him again
Quoted “Closing Time”, every new beginning comes from some others beginning’s end
Iceberg Slim, a pimp, said in his autobiography that he knows why Lady Justice has a blindfold on, it’s because she has dollar signs for eyeballs.
OMG yes! Didn't even realize it when he said it haha. Love it!
This guy is such a reality check. Watched both his episodes and so much stuck to me. Thank you!
I can't help but fall more in love 😍with this guy every time I hear him speak. He's wicked intelligent, an independent thinker (which I absolutely love), compassionate & passionate (love that too), insightful, wise, in touch with his feelings, articulate, and nice to look at too lol. I have always believed in life partnership but questioned marriage and I feel validated every time I listen to James. Thank you Steven for having James on and for the quality content that you guys created🤗. I will definitely be looking for the book! 🤓
💯
Lol chill shorty
Please don't allow your emotions to become so naive. Your gushing over someone you don't know and I'm sorry to say but females of this mindset are usually suseptible to falling for the wrong men because they are easily played.
My wife and I were poor when we got married. We did a potluck dinner for the party. It was way more amazing than we ever could have imagined. This was after the gas pipes for heating froze in the main chamber of the church so we got married in the community room with Ring Pop wedding bands, which were carried by my autistic stepson who had a meltdown because his little sister was nervous and didn't throw the pedals out of the basket in our attempt to have a "normal" which was hilariously emotional and fun. I fully support alternative weddings/parties.
Yea I think big expensive weddings are obnoxious. Going to the courthouse with just the 2 of you should be enough.
The couple holding hands and simply walking side by side, is the feeling of enoughness, contentment in the present moment without expectations, commitment without attachment to an outcome
In one word HAPPINESS.
Seeking pleasure in the future and runnin away from the past vs just being content and happy in the now.
My ex thought contentment was stagnancy while contentment is my main goal in life. Happiness is a pretty transient situational emotion while contentment is stable.
Thanks. I needed this. I've never met a man with an perspective so ridiculously close to mine. I started thinking I'm the freak with no place in this world with my opinion about marriage and love.
Almost crying seeing in comments how many people actually agree with that.
In my view, marriage is the most lovely and dangerous trip we can go on. Its like taking a ship into the ocean, we must learning every day how to navigate despite whatever weather looks like. Sometimes, we just need a strong pray when storms come and let it be. Unfortunately, so many ships will sink, even though they had the best sailors, and some of them will reach the coast alone, while others still in pairs.
I needed this podcast. Had to break up with my girlfriend and I needed to hear that it’s ok, I was just the one that ended it. Neither one of us was happy and it had to end. Thank you DOAC
After watching, I think now that marriage ONLY makes sense WITH a prenup, bc a marriage is a contract, an agreement to unite as a team to benefit each other mutually, and like any contract or agreement, clear expectations of each members role should be defined and what will happen if these expectations are not met. If anything, this would increase accountability.
They should really require a whole prenup meeting prior to issuing a marriage license. It would definitely reduce divorce rates and make sure people were compatible on values prior to getting married.
humans are imperfect; we all know this. We also a feel differently about different types of mistakes, which is totally fine. But should be agreed upon within that marriage.
It was great to hear someone articulating how I think and feel about death, marriage, and children in marriage. A profound conversation. Thanks DOAC
James is 100x more authentic and correct than Jordan Peterson in his approaches. Thank you.
SO many valuable lessons in these two interviews alone! definitely the best guest so far on the podcast 👏
9 out of 10 couples I know are divorced, separated, in the process of, or should be... but in denial, or staying together for $$$ or for their kids (sounds like torture for everyone).
Can confirm. I literally only know 1-2 at all that don’t show signs of total failure (yet).
@@MetallicReg me too! But the 2 couples I know are newlyweds so they are still in honeymoon phase, literally! Marriages don't last these days. Sadly.
Don’t stay together for money reasons. If the sex is over it’s over. Do each of yourselves a favor and help the other get someone new. Time is short in life and opportunities go by so quickly, but tragedies become more regular. You will still be connected to each other like it or not, but if the other spouse can handle tragedies in their life that will be better for you.
I am a product of parents that should have divorced a mil years ago, it damaged my siblings & I in different ways. I knew I never wanted to get married nor have kids since I was a child. My siblings made other choices, which they are struggling to deal with. Generational trauma, rinse and repeat.
It says a lot about you. I have no single divorced friend or relative. All are happily married. Isn't that interesting?
The first time I ran into this channel was with James first interview with Steven. Since then I’ve been a hardcore fan of this channel and James.
This 2nd interview brought me great joy and I wish this man nothing but happiness and grace!
Incredible insight from someone who has to deal with the worst sides of being in a relationship/marriage.
Hello James. I’m a childrens’ hospice nurse and the whole topic of endings is really big for me, so thank you for talking about it. But I have to say: when you were talking about successfully defending an abusive pimp I got so angry with you! How could you have excepted that case!
Then I started advocating for you, after you had mentioned being part of a system. And it made me realise that same for the nurses. Who ever comes, we provide help and care. Terrorist or rapist. Then let another system deal with them. Thank you again. Looking forward to reading your book.
I felt the same way. And thought, he didn't need to take the case. And why would he want to defend a pimp anyway?! Your situation is different as a nurse, you don't get to say whether or not you want to treat a patient. Anyway, I'm only a few minutes into the interview. Maybe I will change my thoughts.
@@jillgreen5288Did you change your thought? 😊
@@rxcharryrxcharry7867 Hmmmm. I understood why he did it. But there is still a part of me saying “you knew, you knew. and you still did it”
@@rxcharryrxcharry7867 so, have you changed your thoughts?
@ @ I asked because although not a very similar thing happened to me, it was the same outcome. I was injured by doctors in a major U.S. hospital, leading to the death of my unborn child and organ failure. The hospital brought sophisticated lawyers and medical experts who purposely lied and freed the hospital and doctors and their staff. I didn't have money to hire sophisticated lawyers, nor the energy to seek one, as I was sick and on dialysis. Still suffering as a result, and the hospital and doctors got away with it just because some lawyers chose to go with the system and love for money. I was born in a foreign country, and the hospital hired doctors from the country I was born to lie. This doctor never took care of me, but she pretended to know exactly what happened to me.
I agree with you that he knew and still did it and should have followed the ethics of maleficence and benevolence, although he seems like a nice person
Professionals who have jobs with public trust should always be truthful and do no harm or keep a blind eye to the harm of others
I did not expect to have a divorce attorney to make me feel so optimistic about the health of my relationship and life in general.❤🎉
Thank you for guesting him again in your show❤ He is one of my most favorites! Full of wisdom, love for life, and at the same time so much understanding and respect for death and endings❤
How adorable Steve looked while asking James all those questions about life with a child like curiosity! I'm sure Steve is going to be an amazing, responsible dad & a loving husband to his wife!
And James....what can i say about this charming man! He gives me an impression of a soul mate from my past life! Please stay around as long as possible! ❤
Oh, the gift a good interviewer!!! (Who asks a good question and just shuts up and actually let'sthe guest answer it!) A rare gift in the world of podcasts nowadays. Thank you for a great interview! (though I don't agree with some of the values of the guest).
Pardon me while I just take a sec at 38:00 and bawl my eyes out because I miss my grandma so much, and yet I'm so happy that she got to see her great-grandkids as often as I could bring them over during the last 3 1/2 years of her life. Her memorial service is this Sunday and this episode hits me right in the feels.
And also again at 54:45, this episode is just full of emotional bangers.
I had this moment with my mother when I was 10 things get real real fast
You are pardoned. Now it's my turn to cry.
Wonderful conversation. I loved your first interview with James. He is passionate about his work. His narration is simple yet full of wisdom and meaning. I could listen to him talk all day.
I have now watched 5 hours of interview, because this man really made me rethink very much. And im completely surprised of him not being a cold and desinterested man, but a wise and very warm one. Thank you for this!!
Very cool video A month ago, I ended a five-year relationship. My soulmate made the decision to walk away from me, and even though I've done everything in my power to get him back, I can't help but feel disappointed because I can't see my life with anyone else. I want to say that I've tried everything to stop thinking about him, but I simply can't. I miss him so much and I don't know why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
I love the podcasts with this man. This is the level of expert you should continue to have