Why Men Can't Find REAL Love... | Neil Strauss
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- Опубліковано 26 чер 2024
- Former No.1 Pick-Up Artist Neil Strauss discusses modern loneliness, failed connections, and the hidden truths behind dating dynamics.
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Neil chnaged my life forever. I read his book The Game back in 2010. That book became a defining moment in my life. I went from no confidence to an amazing social life and happiness. Will always be grateful of Neil, Mystery, Savoy, AFC Adam, Beckster. Legends of The Game.
Only real guys remember the LSS 🇬🇧
I, as a curious woman, have read it too and also think it is great. People have prejudices about it but the message is really about liking yourself and making other people comfortable in your company. Great life skills that benefits everybody
Are you trying to be funny?, the Game was BS, do you think women are honestly attracted to a creep like Neil Strauss?
I’m not saying g social media doesn’t have a part to play, but… too many people believe in movie love like meeting someone on the train or the bar. The older generation married people met in high school or college or at church or community events. And, at those events they were usually set up by friends or family. Expand your circle, show up to stuff, be a nice, well put together person and tell people you are interested in finding someone. If you come recommend by someone else it helps so much. You may not hit it off the first date, most people don’t. But, if you don’t hit off, still be friends. They might know someone else and you’d come highly recommended. I don’t think this generation knows how to network if it’s in person.
This comment says it all. Guys, just read it!
Agree. Younger people especially seem clueless about approaching and meeting in person and just everything else in that arena.. they’d rather sit on their phone scrolling through dating apps and complaining how lonely they are
When will the entire conversation be uploaded? I would love to hear the rest.
Find true love? How about even finding a date? It’s unbelievably difficult on these apps. You would think someone in their mid 20s who is fit, intelligent, has an interesting lifestyle and travels a lot, and also makes 6 figures would find it easy. Nope. It’s so rare for any of these women to even give me a chance. They are all flooded with options that most of the time they stop responding within a few messages or don’t respond to begin with. I don’t even know what to do at this point
Based on your profile, the fact you travel a lot might be off-putting for some women looking to settle with a partner. It makes you seem like a rolling stone and less invested in building a life together. I think also sometimes when men use intelligence as a selling point they try to use their intelligence to talk down to partners instead of use that as a genuine mode of connection. This may not be you, but these are red flags I spot as a woman.
Approach in person brother! You‘ll have skipped all the competition from those apps👍🏾
@@titanqueen13So interesting for you to say this. As much as I appreciate travel it’s not a priority considering I’m looking for someone who’s ready to settle down in one place with me now that I’m in my late 20’s. But everyone is different. 🤷🏽♀️
Try not to sell any of the things you mentioned to a prospective partner. Besides the age, they don't have to know any of the other stuff before you actually physically meet. And even then, let them ask you and don't tell them yourself.
I think for a man who has a lot going for him like you do, humility would be a great approach in the dating world. Good luck!
(If all else fails, there's always women from different cultures who would throw themselves at you)
And a dead ringer for David Brent too, I can’t imagine where you’re going wrong
Be self aware, be funny, think about death, and write poetry all have helped me
I admire you so much Neil. Happy to see you there!
I remember a small thing that happened a few days ago. I was waiting on a bench outside the main train station in my city when a woman came to sit down next to me, I was hoping she noticed me, she didnt. And then she proceeded to turn her head away, I then heard a message about a cancelled train on the tannoy and a turned to her to ask her if she heard which train service had been cancelled and I didnt get a response, and it was only the second time that she noticed I was actually talking to her and took her earphones out that I hadnt realized were in, and I asked her if she heard which train was cancelled, and she said that she didnt know, I then made a joke about the poor train services in the UK, and midway in introducing myself, she put her earphones in and turned around with complete apathy. It hadnt occurred to her that even being in close proximity that there could be any connection whatsoever. If im honest since my relationship broke up during covid, I have noticed that women give less interest than ever before. I think young men are facing the most loneliness, as women very rarely make an effort to make a connection and most of the time even when men go out of their way to attempt a connection it is usually not reciprocated, but I can see why men go out and try and approach women to improve their confidence especially if they have very few reference experiences with women as women rarely make an effort to talk to me or most guys, as they already usually have an abundance of options especially when they are in their 20s and 30s.
To be fair though if she thought you were attractive she'd have at least paid attention. Most people won't give anyone the time of day unless they're attractive. You might not be her cup of tea but there's plenty out there who will like you. Just keep putting yourself out there and you'll find someone 🤷🏻♂️ put some extra care in your appearance too and you'll be fine
@ahmet6144 I am a decent looking guy. Many women wont concur and many will. But even if they find you good looking it is hard to capture their attention, as they have so many options.
Maybe she was taken
Maybe she was just rude, if you’re a man and a woman and you’re talking to that person, I find it so rude when people pretend like you’re not there, this doesn’t stop me but I smile with people all the time and noticed it’s women that rarely have their heads up 😅 I’m married but if a guy talks to me I always talk because talking to each other and engaging in conversation should always be so easy…keep talking to people…
Unfortunately most women default is to see all men as creeps, even if you're asking a genuine question with no ulterior intention you're still seen as a creep. Funny thing is women complain why men don't approach or chat them up anymore well this is the result they created. So I say just leave them alone
Wheres the full interview?
Why isn't the full video available anymore?
Social media…changed everything
Yes
Wow! Neil has me thinking today..lot of good points!
Neil's awesome. I love that he espouses a mature outlook on relationships.
The problem is people are looking to get, not looking to give.
Then they are looking to be deceptive and manipulative to avoid pain, rather than finding courage to be honest and endure it.
I wish I could listen to the entire conversation, I was in the midst of it yesterday, ten minutes in and it disappeared 😅
It’s on the patreon
Ok thank you for your other videos :)
Where’s the full diary of a CEO interview gone???
He removed it for some reason
It’s available on the Apple podcast app
1) looking for love? love yourself 2) sex does not equal love or intimacy. 3) porn is not helping 4) stop treating women as disposable love tanks
stupid unhelpful comment
Sex can be a part of love and intimacy as all romantic relationships should have this, however it isnt just sex that most men want from women, it is part of it for sure, but it is also just simple things like holding hands, having someone look deep into your eyes and actually be present with you and be a companion and validate your existence. Most men unfortunately do not experience these things often, it is unfortunately far harder for a man to find a women who wants him, it isnt womens fault but most men do not measure up in womens eyes to even deserve this.
5) Get RPA, you'll learn what girls are attracted to and for what reason.
I think you're taking to the wrong women or you lack commitment and drive which is what most women are looking for
Brilliance
but where is the full episode? there is no more on doac channel
This was surprisingly good.
I think people in general make less effort with each other. They like idea of being relationship but when comes to it, they don’t want to commit. Dating apps are mess, no one message on there and even if they do, people don’t know how to hold the conversation. And don’t start me about ghosting. It’s happening all the time. We are really in the crisis.
was this video pulled down from YT? i can't find it now. I was listening to it yesterday and it seems to be gone now??
Wow! I was listening your podcast since 4 year ago, I didn't realize that you have a UA-cam channel 😅
The link to the full conversation doesn't work. Will you guys fix it?
Where is the full episode?!
WHERE DID THE FULL VIDEO GO OF THIS CONVERSATION?!?!
why is the full episode removed? how do I watch it?
Why did you delete the full video ?
I love Neil, but the irony of the line "50% of statistics are made up" made me chuckle.
full video ??
I bought and read Neil Strauss' book "The Game" and admired his contributions for years. But I gotta say Neil Strauss is filibustering in this interview. How does addressing the mental health of society help the average guy get a girlfriend?
The full interview was removed.
What happened to the full video?
Why did he remove the full episode
Yeah big ups to Neil, the game changed my life in 2006
Full video is not available
Where has the full video gone
I am a better cook than any single woman I have ever met - as well as a fairly decent baker - and my repertoire consists entirely of dishes I love to eat. So cooking will never be a requirement for me.
crazy that he name dropped Woman in the Dunes, classic great movie
Men, STOP USING DATING APPS!
That will not happen.
Farts?
Guys are too lazy and scared today to go out and approach women .. younger guys especially are
What happened with the full lenght interview?
I was half way through yesterday and now I can’t find it today :(
This is one of the things i dont like about people relying too much on stats when making certain arguments.
In stats class, I was taught that there are means, modes, and mediums, and these things aremt necessarily the same. And yet you'll find people using them interchangeably. And thats disingenuous.
Thank you for pointing this out. There are so many people out there citing studies and statistics without knowing how to interpret them properly. What bothers me apart from the interpretation is the fact that people don't even bother comparing studies (e.g. has this been replicated or refuted by another study) and just cite the one study that shows a result which makes a good headline.
It would be worth having a stats class in secondary school so more people can understand the information thrown at them
nice
I’m about to watch the video and wondering what kind of advice I’m going to receive from a divorced man 🤔
Most of the time, the advice is to not get married. Its a losing game for men.
@@jlambuth …and having sex with men outside of marriage, is a losing game for women.
It was actually really interesting and would highly recommend it. I saw 90% of the video before it was taken down for some reason.
Edit: Could have been due to the parts where Neil Strauss was saying the scene should be cut out in the final edit but he was still explaining certain aspects of his life to Steven.
@elizabethmitchell2963 it is if you pick men that are out your league.
@@jlambuth Women aren’t to “pick men” but to be picked…but that is another Christian value few men seem to subscribe to these days.
Expectations are out of control! - there was a time when if a man had a job, car, house and was kind that would be enough. What does a man need today? Comment below please…
Emotional intelligence, has his own friends, contributes ti household chores, listens ti his partner in the bedroom, just to name a few..
@@BlairCadetabccorrect and that’s not much more to ask! ❤
And men aren't allowed to have any expectations from women. Men are expected to be traditional, and women can go do whatever they want. And if men express preferences like not overweight, no tattoos or crazy piercings, then we're labeled as misogynists! Men are getting wiser. Average women here think they're too good for average men. So men are going overseas and then women here complain about that too. Why should they even care if they reject those men?
@@Gem_iniand for women on the other hand, has the expectations gone up or down?
Where is the full video I’ve searched doc /sb it’s not coming up
Oh I see u removed it , why?
You need to let Neil talk more man
People are becoming more conflict avoidant and have impaired social skills due to modern technology. I would suggest joining a club or group if you want to meet friends or partners in a natural way. Unfortunately younger people are not really joiners. Try to talk to your friends and find connections in your peer group.
Exactly. Young people just want the path of least resistance such as swiping from their couch lol
Does anyone know the type of shirt Neil Strauss is wearing? Trying to find it online.
Where's the full video? Are you trying to train me to watch episodes as soon as they come out? Cos this is how you train me to watch episodes as soon as they come out.
Only by living according to the teaching and practice of The Catholic Church, and embracing the traditional community and family life of the West, will you achieve any type of earthly happiness.
That’s long gone
@@WorldlyAuras-ze9yf It's coming back...
The last guy I met seemed like he’d real Neil and Rich Cooper. He said he dropped out of his dream college to move back to an architecture program near his mother bc she couldn’t handle him being away from her. Saw the coverage of Neil’s new thesis on DailyMail and thought of that guy. What a big fake play he made.
Nice non answer from Neil there at the end lol
Soooo, who's looking?
True love. No. This is not something to chase. For me…we are still far too aligned with our nature. And I think the answer to this conundrum is exactly that too, nature. You want a lady? Listen to Jordan Peterson and be real with yourself.
💜Love God, Love Yourself, Love Others Is How To Get And Give Love💜The Internet Has Become Like The Restaurants And IRL Living: Sterile and Thus Is Deadly To Our Soul And Hate Spreads Faster Than "Covid" and Is The Biggest "Cancer" On Society💜Blessings💜
The other day I was in Barnes & Noble sitting in one of two armchairs that were placed about two feet apart, slightly turned toward the other. A man sat down in the other and immediately (and noisily) shifted the chair so that the angle was less facing and turned away from my chair. Without thinking, the following comment matter-of-factly slipped out of my mouth, "And *that* is why men are single and wonder why it is." I don't know if he heard me, as he didn't react. I usually don't make comments like that, but I'm bothered by the fact that more and more, some men are oblivious to their behavior. Prior to this event, a man put out his cigarette and then spat whatever it was he coughed up, outside of the entrance of a department store where everyone was entering. On another occasion, while engaging in conversation with a male cashier who seemed to be in happy spirits, I asked what he likes best about his job, he went on to say that he likes it, but that he doesn't like having a female boss because she doesn't let him slack (his rant included a few other complaints that I believe all managers expect from their employees) and I'll add, he did not say it in a joking manner. The worst part is he didn't clue in that I'm female or my best friend, who was standing next to me, is one too! 🤪
In my experience, most men are too afraid or don't know how to engage in a simple conversation (online or in person.) Heck, even making eye contact seems to be non-existent these days.
Cell phones have become emotional support crutches for most people. With their heads bent down practically shouting they either don't want or don't know how to engage with others. I know there have to be thousands of great, communicative and wonderful men out there. I still hold out hope that maybe someday I'll find one. ☺️
I'm not sure what the answers are, but I absolutely agree there's a problem and it's not only the men. It's women who wear so much makeup you can smell it, false eyelashes that flap in the wind, nails that look like weapons, clothes that don't leave anything to the imagination, and personalities that are beyond disappointing. I see it all and I've probably said too much here, but definitively, there is a problem. Let's keep trying to figure it out and thank you Steven for sharing all your fantastic guests with us! ❤
We don't wonder why we are single. We are well aware of the issue. That man shifting his chair moved away from the problem.
What a disgusting immature post. As if women are not constantly glued to their phones and do not have their heads far up their own rear ends.
Nowadays, when a girls offers an IOI to a man, it's likely to join her Onlyfans account.
Women love dick heads, criminals, drug dealerss, bad boys and outright jerks because "nice guys are boring". Any half decent, good man won't approach you because he's been rejected most of his life while he watches the woman he likes go off with another low life she finds exciting, while she once again says "I don't know why i keep ending up with the wrong men". Because you keep choosing them. Because you want to. Good men don't try because they know it's pointless.
For your first example, men generally don't like sitting face to face and prefer side by side, even with other men. Face to face can be a bit too "in your face". I understand that it might have been the way he did it though, but your comment was unnecessary and kinda rude.
Women are all truly (and sadly too) 100% sure that there is a 10/10 rich young fit guy somewhere for them. That is the problem of those apps, is that they’ve have risen the women’s standards so high that it leads to disconnect men and women just because of people forgot how to meet someone in your league in the real world.
Not true at all. But I suppose it seems that way to the men that are also looking for quick love on apps. The men who are approaching dating from a numbers game (most) are prone to dating on apps where there are going to find the women that are ALSO playing the numbers game on there too. That's what introducing tech into dating has done. So now women who are dating IRL, are meeting these super bitter men that are treating them just like a number...she then gets bitter and the cycle continues.
And males swear they will find humble models who cook, clean, have sex with you and be mother of the year. She doesn't nag and is submissive. Did I miss anything?🤔
I literally don’t know any woman dating a gorgeous wealthy guy. Most people are not wealthy or stunning. It’s just an excuse maybe very beautiful women aim for that calibre of man. But again if you are chasing after only that kind of woman you can’t be angry she wants the same standards 🤷🏻♀️. The problem is women work now and men are still stuck in the old mentality. Honestly I think women are getting fed up of been expected to do everything. Then look after another adult like a child. It’s a huge issue and every friend or family member 99% of the time that’s what causes issues. Things need to change or dating isn’t gonna get any easier unfortunately.
It's not that! The problem is men don't show curiosity, don't ask questions. I (as a woman) can ask questions up to a certain point, but the truth is that I don't want to chase men so if I don't see reciprocity, I disengage 🤷♀️
Am not on a app
Neil Strauss should know why they can't find love. He taught them how to find superficial relationships and objectify women while acting toxic and narcissistic. This is the opposite of finding true connection.
Strauss taught men how to approach and talk to women to engage in casual hookups - there’s nothing wrong with this as we live in a highly enlightened and sexually liberated society right?
The problem now is men are afraid or just lack the motive or desire to meet women
@@brianmeen2158on point.
This dude has no idea what it’s like dating as a young man and just equating therapy to mental health care is bs it doesn’t solve any of the problems and makes people more miserable
It’s a very sad state of affairs… I would say travel and meet people in other countries! I met my husband travelling
Women have options on dating apps
The pickier women get, the more they end up sharing the same guys.
They're bailing out now....m
The Game was more or less disrespectful to everyone that helped Neil. He went into their world, they helped him a lot, then he trashed them in his book. Neil is a creep.
He shared his opinion in the book. Seem pretty honest on what happened there. Don't see the problem with the game.
@@TBlock1347
The game was b.ullshit.
@@masteryoda498 how so?
@@TBlock1347
You can’t talk your way into a woman’s pants, she’s either physically attracted to you, or she isn’t, and if she isn’t, “it’s game over”.
I wish I care enough about this “problem” to finish watching this conversation. Maybe tomorrow 😂
Great point by Strauss about “statistics” and how often they are juiced or twisted or completely made up. I wish more people understood this . I hear stats today and I’m like meh
Maybe why many men are hard to find real love is because many of them in their heads are stuck with their high school crush. They were dating but it failed. Women usually are not stuck with their high school crush because women in general can move on faster than men. Men may have their next girlfriend or even finally marry their last girlfriend, but there will always be that obsession in their head for their high school crush, it's almost like they can't accept that it didn't work out and that they had been cheated on by the crush. Acceptance of reality is important in this life. Without acceptance, you can't be happy with anything that you have now.
Yes! You are spot on! I agree with you 100% .. have been in a situation like this for over 15 years and I finally have had enough.
Guys, whenever you read this type of stuff… it’s very telling
@@FelipeL67It is true though. Men never forget.........
I remember Neil Strauss and his moon faced woman in the game 👌
Could you do a “Why middle-aged women can’t find love”? Would love to know if there are any tips at all for us old hags…
Because the only good single men at middle age are divorcees or widowers and they don't stay single for long
Well, they don't. 99% of single middle aged women are the same women who treat men like garbage when they are young, due to their feminist indoctrinations... these are the same women who brutally break their men's heart and fuck a new dude within the span of days and make fun of those poor guys. Why? Feminism teaches them, that the most important thing is their career, and men are evil and these women must inflict pain on men by showing how strong independent they are...
Men go through the pain, grow up, and then don't wanna have anything to do with these women, as a revenge cause these are the same old feminists, and quite frankly, except for sex, they have nothing else to offer. No potential for kid etc.
Karma...
that is easy, stop being picky and stay loyal to your husband
Realistically you want to find love, find a good natured/hearted man, who cares if he is bald, a bit out of shape, average job, etc....there are good average men out there, men way above average aren't looking for middle aged women because you've had your time in your 20s/30s
Lower your standards and be realistic. If you're middle aged, out of shape, a single mother.... It's unlikely that the "tall, dark handsome guy" will look your way when he has better options. You may have to really lower yourself and pick a "nice guy".....
Very disappointing appearance from Neil here. He’s clearly been on the sidelines for a long time now, doesn’t understand the modern dating marketplace and the new unique challenges - as well he doesn’t understand how women are moving / operating in this new environment, I think he’d be legitimately shocked to know how standard it is for the majority of typical girls to be dating / sleeping with 4-5 men concurrently, and how generally promiscuous women have become.
The current dating marketplace could be better described by a famous economic model - for example Brazil. The 10% upper class (the haves) and the 90% lower class (have nots). The middle class has completely ceased to exist. A complete bifurcation in the sexual marketplace.
Talked a lot and said nothing 😂😂
Sorry dude, therapists are not the answer. Resilience is the answer. Learning to fail and not feeling a failure.
Stop crying about it, get on with it.
Find something funny to say, be genuine and not creepy and go up to a girl on a night out !!
Don’t wait for apps.
Does it have to be a night out?
Right apps have killed the dating game for everyone.
💯 😊
@@marsjokesfacts am not out at night as a lady only day time for me
Don’t be creepy = don’t be ugly and don’t be short.
I'm calling cap on Neil Strauss. Neil Strauss is an incel
Exactly, the only reason Neil Strauss got laid with a few women (not as much as the PUA industry would like you to be believe), was because of his media connections.
@@masteryoda498 yeah I heard that. I think he was a music critic for the NY times. So, the guy was in a position to make or break a new musician's career.
It's similar to Fresh & Fit being able to sleep with some of their up-and-coming IG models who appear on their show.
Neil looks hit
Please return the full podcast. Where is free speech in this? Just because many women ranted about it, doesn't mean it must be deleted. Everyone has an opinion. Well I guess this podcast no longer seeks the truth and freedom anymore. Come on, what is this?!
Why do you think women owe you attention?
I followed Neil Strauss' work since 2008 but his framework is outdated and he is clueless about the current dating market. On top of that, he was filibustering with a lot of his answers in this interview. This was a terrible interview. Don't bring Neil Strauss back.
My friend Marc Lujan has found real love, is he not a man? @lujitime