40 Harsh Truths I Know at 40 but Wish I Knew at 20
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- Опубліковано 8 бер 2024
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Today is my 40th birthday. Here are all the things that I know at 40 that I wish I knew at 20.
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Everything Is F*cked: A Book About Hope - mrk.mn/2RNxVAD
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Thanks for watching.
41. Don't stick with bad friends just because you've known them a long time.
This!
I can’t stand it when I see “friends” hang out and treat each other like crap all the time. That’s not a friendship; that’s being afraid of loneliness.
42. Stop caring what your bad friends think of you
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Perfect. This lesson was a hurtful one, but my life got so much better when I could just let it go. I kept being attached to how much this person was important to me in the past and forgetting how terrible she made me feel in the present… we must remember all the time that life is here and now 🩵
Everyone who reads this, we don't know each other and probably never will but I wish you all the best in life and all the luck in the world 💕
The same to you!❤
I wish you the best too 💙
Thank you and to you as well🫶🏽☺️
Thank you so much
same to you , sending a lot of blessing on your way!!
"It's never too late" the most comforting thing I've heard in a long time... Kinda feels good to know that I still have so much to achieve.
Depends on what you want to change. I don't know if life advice should be comforting.
@@danielwells774Yeah. Regret is imminent because of our ignorance. That’s okay though. After all, we don’t stay in this world for long. Until our death, might as well be finding the things that matter while also enjoying the little things.
cope, it can be too late, work hard as early as possible, your time on earth is much shorter than you think
@@MelvinDaMan But after we are dead what does it matter what happened?
@@answerman9933 It doesn’t. It’s just worth it (imo).
What's the difference between school and life? In school, we're given a lesson, and then a test. And in life, we're given a test, that teaches us a lesson.
yeah! love that! I prefer LIFE. hated school, and I feel my kids' schooling is terrible. I try to mitigate it. If I could do it again, I'd raise them homeschooled in community
"Define yourself as vaguely and loosely as possible" - this is golden
This one blew my mind. I berate myself for doing this, so it felt great to see it recommended.
I don't get what it means...
Reminds me strongly of the classical ego-dissolution idea from Yoga. It goes hand in hand with choosing carefully what you identify with (I AM xyz). Better to never define yourself because that's closer to the truth anyway ;)
@@nicoletjeng9793Don't define yourself with a simple description. Boiling yourself down to a few specific traits, by your job, or by what hobbies you have right now. Let yourself be many things and continue to expand as a person
@@nicoletjeng9793 Nothing is new. Mr Manson has the the ability to acquire smart people’s concepts and deliver them in a form that is palatable to his market… I believe that rule is heavily derived from Kierkegaard’s, “If you label me, you negate me”. You can Google it’s meaning and how it may be helpful for you.
Best wishes.
#42: Time is the most precious possession we have, once it's gone you don't get it back. So make every day count for something, in some small way or another...
Captain Haddock is that you?
I'm 23 I struggled with depression, burnout, sleeping problems and general mental health since I was 12, wich then turned into addiction and a horrible attitude later in life, I've only just now gotten myself out of it, i never had energy to do anything but sleep and binge youtube videos every day, everyone was always blaming me for being lazy, so i started believing it for myself, i lost all meaning and direction in life.
recently i snapped out of it, stopped blaming myself and started to talk positively to myself, i realised I'd already been through my own personal hel so bring it on I can take anything, i know what true failure feels like and I've seen the bottom of the spiral so fuck it if it happens, i have secretly been truning myself into a machine i took the time to deep-rest and study now i am unstopably confident and i love that.
I don't know who you are, and I don't know where you are, but whoever you are, I am also 23 and in a very uncannily similar situation. I feel you, and I also believe that we can both make it in this world where nothing but hatred and sadness continually brews even more hatred and sadness. I'm sure some famous person said something similar to that last part, or something like that, and that's probably why that's kind of stuck with me for a while now.
love that for you.
I'm right here with you boss, I won't give up.
I too was an addict. The truth is, it was a symptom of a problem. and all of the problems, were created by me ultimately. The way I think about people, places, things and situations.. I had to change it all. (and my heart goes out to. 12 step helped me,.. it's a great place to start.. )
Nothing is black or white. There is no direct leap from this to that. But I've sensed that you have found your inner strength to carry yourself through. There will be obstacles and I trust that you wrestle with them and come on top eventually. Congratulations on our turnaround and welcome to the day to day trials we all struggle with every day! We all fail "normally" from time to time and we all keep going.
Look, I have a video too.
Well, about this video:
- Relationship with others mirrors relationship with oneself: self-respect attracts respect.
- Failure lies in not trying; success and failure coexist in action.
- No one rescues you; self-improvement is personal and ongoing.
- Be the partner you desire; qualities sought in others should be embodied.
- Long-term investments like health and relationships yield significant returns.
TDLR minimalism is almost always better than where you’re coming from.
Happy Birthday Mark! We love you!
Dominion (2018)
Awesome video 🎉 Thank you Mark
I`m a simple person. I see a new Mark Manson video, I click.
Lmao, this is relatable
Same😂❤
Same
Well...
According to the video...
A good guy doesn't call himself good...
🥲 I'm a veri simpol person
I have no idea how he fit all the best advice I've ever heard into one video
Seriously, yes! Advices that we have heard, read and ones that come with experience too!
After watching this video, I asked myself "Define yourself" and I'm surprised I'm speechless. I can't even define myself.
Ahhh…to be 40 again!
Mark Manson’s book changed my mindset, my choices and my life at 46. Now I’m 52 and still looking to him for inspiration. He’s the G.O.A.T.
What was so different to be 40 from 52? 😅
12 years closer to the box@@StoicNature444
@@StoicNature444second this, would love to hear your insight
@@StoicNature444 nothing. You're still the same you except you got permanent debuff like health conditions due to aging, you can negate some of this by taking care of your body.
wich one of his books changed your mindset ?
My 86 year old grandpa 👴 said the advice checks ✔️ out. Follow him. He's the 🐐
Who is he?
@@nicholaslee5885he meant Mark
@@nicholaslee5885 He's him.
the GOAT. Greatest of All Time.@@nicholaslee5885
@@nicholaslee5885 His grandpa
thanks man. I suffered from alcoholism and finally realized how much its taken from my life now that im 38. turning 39. I changed my Life and decided to go cold turkey. Its been two days so far.lol
probably drinking already again. If you are not just a troll, you should seek proffessional help.
@@Ajumi- thanks for the motivation dude. Good show chap... . What about my message says I'm Trolling.
It's worth stopping dude. A lot of good shit just starts happening "magically" over the next year/couple years, once you stop
@@BalanceOvOpposites 6 days so far. Thats a feat for me
Good luck man
I'm 27, and thankful that I figured out a lot of these things on my own, but even more grateful that I discovered this video and am learning even more important things now!
Even at 56, I appreciate your wisdom! Have a great birthday!
What ware the top 3 lessons you’d tell your 20 year old self?
@@sachsuccess Watch the video bro. Here's the timestamp: 0:01.
@@sachsuccess I am 49 now and most of the tips he gave are tips I now know but also would have liked to know in my 20s but hindsight is 20-20.
Top 3:
1. Motivation is not the cause of action, but the effect.
2. The only failure is not trying.
3. There's no such thing as a life without problems.
Hope it helps you!
@@DerIchBinDa that really does help! Thank you so much! I would love to use these tips for the basis of a short or TikTok soon :)
Jesus Christ wants a personal relationship with you through the Holy Spirit, not religion and blind faith. You see, we all have sinned and deserve punishment but God saved us from the eternal punishment of our sins by sending His Son Jesus Christ, fullness of God bodily, a perfect, sinless sacrifice to pay the penalty for our sins by shedding His blood on the cross. He died and rose from the dead so that we may have everlasting life. It is all finished and now for you to accept the free gift of grace you must believe from your heart in Jesus Christ, that He paid the price for your sins, that He is risen and alive. Don't trust in your own goodness but transfer your trust to Jesus and follow Him, get to know Him personally. By faith you will receive the Holy Spirit, become born again, know Jesus personally and He will transform your heart and clean you from the inside out. Believe in Him, read the Bible and pray for the Holy Spirit to fill you and change you, obey the Word. Much love and God bless you!
Loved that ending. I'm only 26 and I work in radio. I really want to be a Newsreader but I feel this intense pressure that I'm running out of time. The fact that you started writing at 27 and still managed to become many peoples favourite author gives me hope that I don't need to stress so much
Get a mentor bro
It's literally like... when you start it will suck. And then over time it will get better. And in 5 years you will look back and think it was good that you started it. Because you will know you won't be the one laying on your deathbed regretting you didn't try.
Dude, you're so early that I'm a bit jealous. I'm 48 and still think it's not over. Get going...
@@rainydevilgaming7386absolutely!
you literally lived only 10% of your adult life, you didn't even finish the first level dude
here's what I found: No one is going to be happy about your success so celebrate quietly.
😊
I'm emotional right now😢.Thankful I've found your content!❤ needed most of these advices badly😔
I'm 30 and been depressed feeling old because I couldn't make my dream true due to suffering mentally in life ... but I literally just posted a video today starting a series called 'SUPERSTAR in three years' because I want to change my life after losing my dream due to depression and been busy surviving all hardships including homelessness so I want to inspire others, and your video's timing is like a sign from the universe, especially that I just self published my Homeless Photographer book... so thank you for the push I needed. Also you age like fine wine.
Be our inspiration!!
Ik you might think that, but You’re not old at ALL omg. I feel like you’re so young and 30 is so empowering. Wishing you all the luck happiness and success 🎉❤
You too will age like fine wine.
Good luck with your journey , I'm rooting for you
I am here right now.
I am 21, and have been following you for the last couple of years, thank you for all your knowledge! Happy Birthday Mark!
Youre a woman, you dont need advice other than learn to cook and dont gain weight
Thank you for everything Mark, your advice is genuinely useful and practical
As a 27 years old girl, this helped me so much. I jotted everything down in my journal and I’ll use your lessons to live with more wisdom from now on. Thank you ❤
For number 9, it's very important to remember the difference between taking responsibility vs. *blaming yourself* for your problems. Personally, blaming myself for my lack of motivation and constant procrastination from ADHD has led to years of self-perpetuating shame, apathy, and helplessness. Combatting issues caused by neurodivergence/mental unwellness is most certainly an uphill battle, and one almost always requires outside help to win it. Remember to take responsibility for your problems, but also to never do it alone. If you're struggling to make a change in your life, let go of shame and *ask for help.*
Concur. Sometimes reassigning the blame to the person/people at fault instead of yourself is actually taking your power back, not giving it away.
I wish I'd known I'm AuDHD before I nearly died from burnout and the impact it had on my body. The fact I could have had supports from a young child and grown into my strengths with a life that fits my needs instead of becoming completely incapacitated in my early-mid 30s with zero supports and services and no hope.
Taking responsibility means taking action, not taking the blame.
I struggle with adhd too. I try to forget about figuring out who is to blame because it literally doesn’t matter.
that's true, so how did you come to conclusion regarding ADHD? because these symptoms are not like physical symptoms .like even a normal person can have lack of motivation and procrastinate things, should we need to get it evaluated by doctor and let them establish neuro divergence? because of lot of situations in life of a person since childhood he can still become demotivated even with out ADHD
@@pavankumar-gh1zr everyone is human, but the impact of different types of neurodivergent conditions and people realising they have different neurotypes to normal (if it's not already picked up in childhood due to high support needs) is the impact to daily living ability.
There are a lot of different diagnostics now for people to check against, they're not always worded well for people who aren't used to the jargon to match, I've seen two different individuals state that they're professionals in the industry one was a psychologist and another a psychiatrist and neither worked out they were autistic until several years into their professional working life, that's how far behind and limited the knowledge is around these different neurotypes. Some professionals still think that if someone can make eye contact that you cannot be autistic. Which is incorrect, of course different countries will have variance with diagnostic criteria and older professionals will be resistant to updating their knowledge.
Anyway, the main thing is the impact to daily functioning. You think it's not a physical symptom but they definitely are, it's just harder to see the brain and with some physical signs people learn to suppress or mask them so they're not obvious or have a tonne of coping mechanisms in place to hide it. That's not sustainable though and a lot of people, especially now, are hitting the metaphorical wall and everything is just falling in a heap.
but you need to figure out who to blame before taking the appropriate action.
if you find part of your body to be itchy, how could you not blame it on the mosquitos, before buying a mosquito light@floder-e
Happy 40th man. Been a big part of my life since I was completely lost at 17. You are so important, we love you.
That gives us no indication of how long youve been listening to him. Were you 17 last year? Or wwre you 17 over ten years ago?
@@PolishBehemoth brotha why does it matter?
@@IbailI just asking a question. If you cant post things that make sense to other people then dont post at all. The purpose of the comment section is communication.
@@PolishBehemoth bro if you need to know down to the second how long bro has had an effect on this man you have a problem.
@@IbailI now youre making up stupid stuff. All i implied was to specify how long he was talking about.
Thank you man. I really needed to hear these. Most of us know these truths by default but won't pay attention to them as much as we need to. It's good to hear them from someone else as a reminder :)
Happy Birthday! You are truly amazing
started crying when you said its never to late/ im struggling so much with making decisions and changing directions and feeling like i waste so much time every day and that i could be produtive. i feel like this will be my life forever. constnatly indecisive and in torment. i know i can change this mindset if changed so many habits and outlooks before. this video may be what ive needed to get out of a slump. thank you and happy birthday. hopethe marathon goes well. im doing one too on my 29th birthday
As long as you're learning how to live better and improving from yesterday, no amount of effort is too small or not worth it! You've got this 💪💪 Proud of you
Honey, read what you said above. Your answers are in the one paragraph. 29..... you're still growing. Print all of this out, put it in an envelope marked with "do not open until age 44" then put it in a safe place. If you can't wait then open it when you're 39. I promise, you"ll have a completely different mindset.
One more thing, always send cards to yourself. Through the mail! Then don't open them for a few years. Write little encouragements to yourself. Let's see how far you've come in being secure in your own skin. Good luck! Love yourself more.
Made me teary eyed as well. Especially when he says you have nothing to prove…to anyone. Even to yourself. I feel such a compelling need to prove to everyone that I’m successful. Prove to myself that I can do it, after failing my whole life. And I feel the same. Always been so indecisive and inconsistent in life. Sometimes it’s just overwhelming
Mindset, Carol Dweck.
mark you are awesome, i am currently 18 years old in INDIA, failed an important exam, but after watching you, i will start taking small steps and they will ultimately add up to big things. Thank you, for teaching me how to not give a fuck. PEACE OUT........
Ayo I'm from India too mate
I also failed jee are you taking a drop
He doesn't give a fuck 😂@@black.spadez
From someone who discovered Mark when I was 18, you've discovered something really valuable!
Bro proportionally speaking almost no one succeeds in the JEE anyway, you're alright
Happy birthday Mark! Appreciate you / your content 🙌
This is gold! Save it, cherish it, practice it.
As a completely lost adult in his 30s, your final harsh truth + story gives me hope. Thank you & happy 40th!
Number 37, "you don't have to prove anything to anyone, including yourself." - All I will say is thank you and these words mean a lot to me and that quote especially. Thanks for being you Mark and happy 40th birthday!! Great video and advice to hear in your late 20's.
Straight to the point video! Cheers! Happy Be-lated Birthday, Mark! 🎂🎉🙏
This is straight forward and to the point. As a very dedicated person to mental health, I appreciate this video and am grabbing a pen and paper. Keep it up.
Thank you for #40! I recently turned 63 and I've been worried that I was too old to make the changes I want to make in my life. Actually thank you for this whole list, Mark. A lot of it are things that I needed to hear.
You can do it! 🤘🏼
Your age you should be giving advice to the guy on the video, not thanking him for teaching you things
@@deltaxcd "At your age you should be able to solve your own medical problems, not go to a doctor younger than you for help." You are genuinely a peabrain.
Live long Sir!!! I wish to see you at 100 and beyond. Eternally grateful 💌
This was great, man. Thanks. Happy birthday! 🎉
Thank you! For everything. This is from a 23 year old who decided to take forward his family business. I love the problems I have everyday!
Congratulations! And thanks for all your writings !
I will be 27 in May, and I am glad I found your channel! Don't stop, life experiences matter just as much!
There's a lot of wisdom here. Thank you. It's good to hear it. I need to play this over and over again.
This is such an informative video. Every point made is so accurate and powerful!
Happy birthday, good man. If there's one youtuber who's positively impacted my life for the better, it'd be you. You're a real one.
This was very helpful. I'm 53, I remember having a consultation with a fiduciary last August, and it was incredibly insightful. Can’t stress enough how important experts in this field are!
Absolutely agree! A good fiduciary can make a world of difference. What specific insights did you gain?
My colleagues had a good laugh at me when I told them I started my journey with $5k capital and how I accumulated over 5 figures within a span of 7 months. They never believed me until I pulled out my P&L.
I know that learning the ins and outs of the stock market isn't for everyone, that's why personally, Jonas Herman oversees my investments.
I'm 45 living paycheck to paycheck hoping things would change someday, still nothing. I want to start investing to live a better life and also have savings for little kids. Can he help me?
@@Ferocious923 I'm 45 living paycheck to paycheck hoping things would change someday, still nothing. I want to start investing to live a better life and also have savings for little kids. Can he help me?
Plenty of gold here. Thank you! ❤
That was SO refreshing. Thank you!
May you continue to shine like a diamond. Wishing you happiness and good health always. Happy Birthday!
Last year I managed to watch all Mark Manson videos on UA-cam. Gladly I finished them and I appreciate how it contributed to my mental state. Happy birthday Mark
What a gift! My heartful thanks to Mark Manson. You're a G.
I always find values in your videos Mr. Manson. keep it up my man. Love you always.
Happy birthday Mark! Thank you for cleaning my life.
Happy Birthday Mark!
I'm turning 18 next month, and I'm really grateful to have found you at such a crucial age as I enter into adulthood. Your wisdom has had an enormous impact on my life and perspective. I wish you lots of health and happiness. Cheers to your birthday.
Love you, Mark! :)
Thank you so much for the precious advice. I wish you a healthy and happy life.😇
This is phenomenal and true. Thanks Mark✌️❤️
Happy birthday Mark. Thank you!🎉
I'm gonna save this video and watch it every single day for the nearest future!
This is the truth and motivation I think I need to grow up and make something of my self.
Thank you Mark
Thanks for the incredible opportunity to grow! The lessons I’ve learned from these videos are truly life-changing. 😊
This is a list of the absolute obvious, funny how I needed to hear it. This is a very positive affirmation for me. Thank You for doing it and Thank You for Being
Mark, thank you for the courageous vulnerability. You exposed some really helpful stuff for me under the thousand stones you wrestled underneath. Your attitude has encouraged me to get on with living a life worth living. Happy birthday! 🎉
I've learned so many of these the hard way... My thirties so far have been me picking up the pieces from all of the mistakes I made over the last twenty years.
This is quite normal, I barely know anyone who got things right in their first few decades. It seems like humanity hasn't figured out a system yet to instill some wisdom and foresight into its young ones early on. So, mistakes and pain will remain our best teachers for while to come...
Same ,feeling
@@r-type4945 I'm 70, and I've learned that sometimes you don't know you've fucked up until years or decades later. Many years ago I was in a relationship with a very sweet woman who thought I hung the moon. She had 2 children who also thought I hung the moon. I felt like I was just not good with kids. Some of our issues in the relationship centered around the kids 'being a problem' for me. Now, many years later, I realize that I was selfish. The problem was me. Today, the kids still love me, and the woman and I are Facebook friends. We've talked at funerals and both asserted that the other was the love of our lives. I am alone, and all of my family is dead. I walked away from a family who loved me because I didn't realize that I was the problem. That makes me sad.
likewise man
The problems never go away, but if they are better problems, you're making progress. Number 19 is life.
I love this, Mark! Thank you so much ❤
This is actually beautiful, the wisdom in this content, the reflections and how it correlates to someone who’s trying to better themselves.
Just finished the subtle art of not giving a f yesterday and it was amazing ✨
Happy Birthday Mark! Thank you for your work on "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck", it has provided an approach to living that allows me to be more at peace with myself
yesssssss these all ring true. I've experienced both sides of it. SO thankful to be understanding/ following most of this now
That list is awesome. Thank you.
The story of the old lady really gives me hope: it’s never too late to learn anything and I can become proficient in anything I strive for.
Thank you, old lady in the story
Happy Birthday Mark!
Happy 40th Birthday - Congrats on this Epic Milestone!!🎉👏🏼 Keep on being and doing you - you are Awesome, Mark!!😎💥 Best video I've watched - will definitely rewatch many times to keep fresh with all these Amazing nuggets of truth - Thank you!!!!🙏🔥
I just love this guy, have read both of his books... you are great MARK.... thank you ☺
Thank you. I'm 23, and I knew a lot of these subconsciously, but hearing it definitely helps a lot
Happy 40th Mr Manson 🎉
I needed to hear this today. Thank you Mark!
Just because this was recommended to me and because I liked the advice, I subscribed. Thanks Mark.
I will be 45 years old in May. Time to change ❤. Happy Birthday Mark. Thanks for the years of advice (I first read "The subtle art of not giving a @#$%"). Always learning 😉
Happy Birthday my man🎉, love you
Really awesome man, I need to listen to this everyday. Love you work, your message... I quote you all the time. I don't think people understand how much messages like this help individuals like myself.
That was a pack of motivation much needed! Thank you!
My God the amount of insight and wisdom that’s packed into this 13 min video. Astounding! Absolutely incredible job Mark! Happy Birthday!
🎂Happy birthday 🐠 May your wildest dreams come true
These advice are so good, it clears a lot of mental block for me. Thank you!
Great content, great delivery. Thank you!
Very Happy Birthday to you Mark ❣️
God bless you 👼🏻
I hope you live long... ❤
Love for Bharat (India)
The thing you said about time actually brought me to tears - you literally just changed my whole world view. I hate rushing things and I often feel like I have to do so in order to accomplish anything. Now I feel like everything will be okay and I'll be able to do anything I want. Maybe deep down I already knew and your fact just brought it up for me to realise.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MARK! THE VERY FIRST TIME I NOTICED ABOUT YOU IS THAT I READ YOUR BOOK AND IT IS REALLY EASY TO GET THE IDEA. I STRATED TO NOTICE YOUR CHANNEL. BE HONEST, I CANNOT REALLY UNDERSTAND ALL THESE IDEAS BUT SOME OF THEM ARE REALLY HELPFUL TO ME. THANK YOU.
I luv this guy, rough tough & absolutely truthful,
This is one clever man.Such empathy and wisdom here... I am 28 and kinda lost. These kinds of videos give me hope about my future.Thank you for this.
I’m 53 and this is brilliant and 100% correct. I didn’t follow half of this list and paid a heavy price, but turned it around in my 40s. Life couldn’t be better now in my 50s 🙏
Thank you I needed this today ☀️☀️have a good day Mark😊
Love the way you explains everything.
Happy Birthday, Mark!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
You‘re amazing!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I found a great deal of meaning (value) in what you are saying. Thank you. I watched once all the way through and then watched again hitting pause here and there to contemplate your lesson for my life. Best video all day. Yes, happy birthday! Awesome gift.
Thank for this great energy and all the good advices
Thank you so much, Mark! My friends think it's mainstream to read your book and even mainstream to watch your videos because you and your videos were once too popular and somehow you've lost your spark, but let me tell you something, I've never resonated with anyone as I've with you. I always listen to you like I'd listen to my father if only he made any sense, so thank you for these videos and lessons. Even though I won't remember half of them, I'll try to revisit and revise. Happy 40th, you're my dad's age now, lmfao!
yes my dad is in his 40s and said the same thing kinda when u say yes to something u are simultaneously saying no to something and vice versa so always check both side of the coin when u say yes or no to something
Happy birthday Mark . You said on Tom Bilyeu you would quit the day you feel like you won’t help others. You are helping myself and countless others. You are S tier guy.
Love you, Mark! Thanks for coming up with this video. I'm depressed with life right now and your perspective uplifted me alot.❤
Rooting for you bro, Never give up!
Thank you so much.