I never really thought about how important knowing how to process emotions was. Society just expects people to know how to process emotions since they come up so naturally, and we are never explicitly taught how to do this. But the tips you provided just felt so helpful. Especially the one about reflecting on your day; there are just so many things going on in life that we never acknowledge, and they can wear us down without us knowing if we don't address them. I will definitely use some of these tips. Thank you!
Absolutely. Parents don't teach us because they were not taught, and without feelings, you cannot shift your vibrational frequency at create everything you've ever desired. We are energy frequency and vibration and emotions are energy and motion. When we are drop down into the body and pay more attention than being up in our thoughts which have been programmed throughout the years..... we connect back to our power that we had when we were children.❤ when we allow emotions to flow through our energy centers without blockage, we clear up any illness and disease that we created within ourselves. Repressed emotions and spiritual blockages are the cause of us and disease, if we don't love ourselves enough then we're not aware of what we're putting in our bodies and what chemicals and toxins are around us, but low vibrational people Etc, because we have created our own reality and brought to us everything that's ever shown up, every person every situation and every opportunity.. all of that carries a frequency. That's how powerful we are ;-)
Same here. But in order for us to become healthy and stronger mentally we have to acknowledge the ugly emotions and actions that affect us . Like the girl in this video said, accumulating emotions eventually makes you break. So ironically in order for us to not be weak we have to actually acknowledge emotions and process them. Your family are assholes and they are the weak ones. I’m sorry you had to go through that.
Steps: 1. Acknowledge and name the emotion 2. Pause and notice - don't avoid emotion or use distractions 3. Sit in silence for 5 mins. 4. Reflect on your day 5 mins before sleep 5. Emotional chart- name the emotion 6. Don't justify your feeling 7. Moving forward- the feeling may come up again but it will less intensive every consecutive time. Feel empowered for acknowledging and resolving your feelings. Have an healthy coping mechanism: exercise/ journaling/ talking to therapist, partner, friend/ walking/ pursue hobby/ shower/sleep.
@@Abishhhhh Idk, autistic people all operate just as different as everyone else. I'm autistic too and I don't think your autism is what makes this unhelpful for you. It's just your personality, your method of processing being different. No one said this was the Only Way
Emotional intelligence classes should be a thing. It’s even academically justifiable because it could get into other subjects like science, the arts, and business interpersonal skills.
Look up Daniel Goleman. It's exactly what he says we should be doing. Lessons in emotional intelligence, who am and where do I come from, family constellations, if we taught this, the world would literally be a better place for it. Society - especially after the disconnect of corona - needs a massive course correction.
It wasn't considered a topic for a class because, scientifically speaking, a child learns the emotional regulation techniques by copying the methods their parent is using. For example, if a 6 yo gets hurt, they look at adults nearby, and copy their reaction to what happened. Thus, it is expected that all children will have emotional regulation and emotional processing learned from their parents. Unfortunately, not all parents know healthy ways of emotional processing, and tend to pass their trauma down the generations - and there's a lot of trauma passed down after ww1 and ww2, at least in the western cultures. Plus, it is more common for both parents to be at work most of the day, so they can't be around to address the child's emotional needs as before. Thus, the emotional regulations skills are in such a sorry state right now. It would be nice if they were taught in school to fix this gap, yeah.
My mom teaches social emotional learning to k-12 kids! A lot of schools are actually starting to implement it into their curriculum and I’m so jealous I didn’t have this when I was younger
I remember the first time I just let my anxiety course through me instead of trying to explain it or suppress it. I placed a hand on my chest and allowed my heart to beat rapidly until it finally calmed down. Afterward it was a lot easier to take myself out of anxiety spirals before they even started. In my childhood I was shamed for expressing distress despite it being an appropriate response to trauma I was experiencing. Being able to process negative emotions is essential for my mental wellbeing.
Isn't it wonderful? I'm blocking the energy centers is so important.... breathing and allowing the flow❤ trusting and surrendering. There is nothing to fear, there is only love.
From the perspective of someone a little older, if you’re working on any of this stuff in your 20s, and think that you’re behind in any way, I definitely want to let you know that you absolutely are NOT. ❤ There are so many people who continually go throughout their lives never addressing this stuff, even though it massively affects both them, and how they interact with the world around them. They still just flatly refuse to go anywhere near the issue. I say all this to say, just working on these things at all, and especially at such a young age, is incredibly commendable. And, you’re actually quite ahead in life to be looking at them now, so you should definitely take pride in your self awareness and your decisions, because it is not easy.
I'm very encouraged by this as someone who feels massively behind from not learning how to be secure from childhood. Thank you for your kind words, and I wish you prosperity and contentment on your journey 🫂✌️
commenting for the algorithm bc this was actually so helpful + practical! like people always say that you have to process your emotions & not avoid them in order to heal but i'm not sure i've ever heard anyone spell out exactly how to do that, or at least not in a way that's stuck with me. i think this video is one that i'll think of often moving forward :)
I was in therapy for several years with an EMDR therapist.... oddly enough, she never taught me anything about how to actually process an emotion. I spent hundreds of sessions digging through my childhood trauma, but just intellectualizing everything and continuing to bottle and avoid because it felt bad. Fast forward to now, and I can tell my body kept score all those years
i'm so glad this popped up on my recommended. i recently was struggling with processing anger and expressing it a non-destructive healthy way. I used to believe that i wasn't an angry person and that i could never be angry, but i think i was doing myself a disservice but not allowing myself to feel those heavy and hard emotions. once i started acknowledging that anger is within everyone and is a completely normal feeling to have, i feel like my perspective on life and how to manage my emotions changed for the better. it allowed me to be accepting of myself, and because of it, i've found ways to express my anger and cope with these heavy emotions in a way that works for me, isn't destructive, and doesn't push away people that mean the most to me. you can do it!
Anger is a valid emotion. I could talk forever about this but anger is a sign that your boundaries are being disrespected and violated. Expressing frustration is super important!
Absolutely LOVED this topic. It's unfair how a lot of ppl may feel shame for expressing themselves (myself included, but we're getting there whoo). Im actually really big on ppl giving and receiving a proper apology because that to me is one way how you show someone you're sincere about the way you made them feel, no matter how small like you said. I don't wanna make this too long, but thank you for sharing your thoughts and input on this topic. It's an eye-opener and feels comforting to know others are going through the same thing, and see these issues being talked about. Keep up the amazing work!💙
i rly love the fact that this video includes so much actual advice, techniques and ways to actually put into action getting better. so many self-help videos just use vague quotes and feelings but don't explain how to actually deal in the moment.
I have this video saved because it really helped me. I had a bad experience this weekend, cried, disassociated, went into flight mode and have not taken care of it. Thank you for making this video so I can come back and deal with it
Everybody talk about processing emotions but nobody tells how to actually do it, its like they don't know it themselves and just repeats it, because its 'important'. Thank you so much for providing the knowledge to us! I wondered if you can heal yourself without therapy. I will make sure to follow what you've said in order to process my own trauma that i've been dealing with for a while and I acknowledged it but haven't done anything about it. Thanks again
OMG i have been in therapy for 10 years with cptsd and this has been the most helpful thing anyone has told me so far. I have been asking how to process emotions for years and no therapist has answered that question, nor have I seen this online. No one tells you HOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
the more experience i get in therapy (3+ years) the more frustrated i get when i observe friends constantly intellectualizing their emotions and projecting them all over the place ~ it's been helpful to pull out the feeling wheel with friends! really smart people aren't necessarily emotionally intelligent
I love this. It took me over 15 years of therapy to love myself enough to let my body process emotions. This year, at 30, after going one year sober, and after breaking up with what I thought was the love of my life, I finally held myself in my own arms and said "I'm proud of you. You're doing the right thing". Devestating, but so liberating. I always thought I was very emotionally mature. I would intelectualize everything, talk about it to no end, but never actually process any of it. It hits like a ton of bricks when you get there, but now crying feels like a release and not a catastrophy.
this video is genuinely life changing i do not understand why they don't teach this more in schools or anywhere because dear lord why am i just learning about these. it's like unspoken rules people forgot to tell. thank you so much for this.
8:41 hit me. I constantly feel that im always in the wrong for setting boundaries. And its been hard to regulate my emotions. Thus video is God sent. Thanks sm.
This was actually so helpful to listen to… I’ve only started thinking about emotions this way very recently (like this year) and the way you put it all together makes a lot of sense. Bookmarking for sure
Subscribed. I've had over 20 years of trauma thanks to my family; and even though i go for therapy, I've realised there's so much self work to be done. I have no idea what emotions I feel (my go-to is any kind of distraction) because I didn't have the space to emote as a child. Thank you for this video. This is just the beginning of my journey.
Kinda just proves how bad most therapists are that they don't really have any advice on how to do this, either. Like, you've got to do it yourself, but isn't the whole point that they're supposed to help you along?
FYI generally basic meditation practices ARE just sitting with your thoughts and emotions you're supposed to let whatever comes up come up. What's advised is to learn to pull your "mental spotlight" back a bit so rather than being trapped within those emotions you can... observe them from a distance. That does NOT mean not feeling them, but ultimately it's the reason for the concept of "not-self" or whatever, you are not your feelings because there isn't a you, not perceptually, just stuff that's happening and an observer. It's hard to explain but it DOES make this process easier.
To me, meditation falls short, however, depending on which technique. I find it's vital to let the body speak and calm itself down in the process. Meditation can be strenuous with trying to let thoughts go. As Yung Pueblo also explains, thoughts have their origins in the body, and just letting things be brings you into being and feeling, not being your emotions.
This is exactly what I did to clear out an abandonment trigger... Instead of reacting we must stop and breathe .. The body's waiting for us to acknowledge it because it's held it in and kept score since we were children. People are so afraid of feeling the pain of the emotion because they remember it from childhood they don't realize that they are the one adult now in charge and not powerless and can redirect and clear it through the energy centers. And allow it to flow out and release the blockage, once we trust and surrender❤ The best way to learn to pause is by starting meditative practices because you learn to observe your thoughts, and stop believing them or acting on them. The world has been deliberately created as a matrix to distract control and enslave us because we have reactive triggers, to what's on the news for example.... just because it's their doesn't mean we have to believe it or act on it. Breathing and responding from our own internal guidance is how you take your power back. But it stems from a lot of toxic and dysfunctional family patterns and cycles that are inner child needs to heal from, otherwise we repeat the patterns with our jobs our employers, our partners friends etcetera. We attract and create our own external world that is mimicking how we feel internally. Energy healing and sound healing is great for the body as well, because it's about unblocking energy centers, the chakras... we are energy frequency and vibrational beings first and foremost❤ in meditation you receive the answers you seek.. because you have learned to detach from the external world and especially family members or others thoughts and feelings because they are not ours and they have nothing to do with us, and never did. They can only merely reflect externally what's going on within them at any given moment. Just as we do.
crafts is such a good way to release emotions! during my most stressful moments, i break out my gouache paints or ipad procreate or just a sketchbook, and the feeling of creating takes the sting out of whatever burden i carry. another activity that surprisingly helps is driving lol, i find it relaxing because i'm occupied and i'm also getting somewhere (i usually drive slow and just for a coffee in my neighbourhood, my mind likes to wander when i wait for red lights)
Wow wow wow!!! It’s almost as though you just rifled through my journal. A journal which only came into existence when I started to realise that I wasn’t processing my emotions properly. Processing is such a key and fundamental word and I, like you, came to the realisation through learning from my own experiences and reflecting. Can’t even tell you how much good this entire thing has done my mind and body and will continue to. My one piece of advice would be for everyone to remember that you’re not going to be brilliant at processing your emotions straight away. It isn’t a magic fix, but a journey. You’ll ‘back-slide’ and have times (that may be a day, it may be a month, or longer) you go through without processing your emotions properly. But that’s okay. It’s part of it. And once you identify it, it just goes to show that you’ve made progress. Each time, you’ll get better at identifying things and these emotions will not become less, or non-existent, but you will be better equipped to handle them each time.
thank you so much for helping people, this can be a hard and weird issue to tackle, & it’s so appreciated.❤️ people can always change if they choose to act in their own highest good, and move with integrity; helping yourself and choosing to do the work: is magic working upon your own life. God bless you🥰❤️
I'm glad UA-cam randomly recommends me this video and I clicked it and watched it til the end. It's very organized and helpful. As now I'm waiting for my first therapy session, I'm gonna try these tips to help me go through these weeks of waiting. Thank you for the sharing!
Great service you are providing! You are sound. Universally proper. You are a breath of fresh air. If you are doing this now, imagine what you will do in 15 years. The information is helpful and you are pleasing to watch. Keep it up young woman got a bright future ahead of you!
You're amazing beyond words and this helped me so much I'm still processing the fact that I didn't know about any of this my entire life. I'll be applying alllll of these because literally each thing you said resonates and really hit the nail, I'm so so so grateful to have come across your video ❤ God bless you!!! I'm looking forward to learning more from you. This changed everything for me
This is a video that hit the spot right on. I love how it is just you, in your room without any loud background noise. Only subtitles and titles in the screen to make it easier to follow the words you are saying. I don't know if you know how impactful your video can be for several people around the world. How you structured your sentences are well chosen to get the message across that you wanted. I am happy to see many people trying to break the cycle of numbing every emotion down and I am proud to say that I am one of the people who tries. Bless your soul!❤
Processing emotions and suppressing emotions are not mutually exclusive. Emotions and thoughts can be suppressed temporarily and processed later on. This is especially useful to get work done or to enjoy social events. “Suppressing emotions” is a loose phrase that can mean multiple things: 1. Avoiding analyzing the internal emotions. 2. Avoiding talking about the internal pain externally. 3. Avoiding feeling the internal pain. 4. Avoiding external emotional expressions of internal pain: i.e. crying, screaming, etc. *We should generally analyze the internal pain to an extent. How much we should analyze the internal pain varies from person to person and day to day. *Sometimes we should talk about the situation to others depending on the person and situation. *After some processing, we should force ourselves into healthy, leisurely activities and/or work. How much and when we should force ourselves varies from person to person and day to day. *We should rarely hold back from crying as crying will reduce the suffering, even just temporarily. Analyzing or talking about the internal pain is different from analyzing or talking about the external problem. Emotions are not toothpaste in a bottle. After we process them, they often come flooding back later. Often times bringing negative unconscious thoughts to the conscious level (“surfacing”) will trouble people significantly more than they did when they were unconscious. It’s crucial to find a balance where emotions are acknowledged and dealt with without getting stuck in a cycle of rumination.
the sitting for 5 minutes is pretty much medetation, you pay attention to what thoughts appear when you dont have anything distracting you from your emotions
I have to go all the way back to this video, to tell you how much it has changed my last few weeks... I have practiced the 5 minutes every day completely in solitude and OMG... being able to hear my thoughts and feel my body is such a life changer. I even made a mindmap to summarize your video and drew the whole emotions chart down in my notebook haha. Anw... just want to say thank you sm for sharing your knowledge here online
thanks. Knew my heart felt horrible but when i addressed with microscopic detail why, and the person who hurt me it stopped hurting. The anxiety of being “in trouble” subsided substantially.
Writing something down doesnt mean its gonna manifest. More you write the chaos down, less power it has over you. Basically you put your thoughts under objective analisis by writing them down or saying them out loud. I use to think i will manifest bad things if i say them or give them much thought, but it doesnt work that way. Its the intent that manifests. Your intent is to get to know you, be there for you and have a catharsis, this is what it is. This is what you manifest. We dont manifest what we say, this is media gurus bs they go around saying and actually causing fear. This is blocking your from releasing emotions. Its a real block. Most emotions are blocked by fear so you then need to deal with fear first. Write those thoughts down over and over again. This is how they lose power. Here we manifest what we fundemantally believe in, not what we say thought by thought. And if we believe something that doesnt suit us to manifest, the best way for it to lose power over you is shedding light on it and writing it down. This why it doesnt need to manifest for you to give it attention. The reason bad stuff manifests is because we refuse to become aware and then the reflection needs to become so aware we have no choice but to face it. The quality of our life is dependent on the willingness to face the negative emotions and thoughts when they are pebbles, so they dont turn into rocks we have to dig ourselves under. You had no support processing your emotions and feel unsafe to do it. My upbringing left the same issue, but sooner you realize it sooner you will be able to dive deeper into the emotion so it can be processed without resistance. In the meantime its a good idea to hold yourself during the fear without trying to think of anything. Lately its been said naming the emotion does nothing but take you from feeling to thinking, which is a form of resistance. Feel and process without the need to name it. That way it reveals itself at the core even or.
WOW! thank you for this I do journal but this video explains so much why journal helps me to process my thoughts. Journal, reading bible and pray - this three is a big help for me to fight my negative thoughts.
Hi, I just want to say that I really love your voice and the way you speak. Your choice of words is so thoughtful and impactful. Do you happen to have a podcast on Spotify? If you don't, I genuinely think you should consider starting one-I’d absolutely listen to it! Also, thank you so much for the advice. It’s been incredibly helpful, especially since I’ve been struggling to deal with my emotions lately. I’ve been avoiding them because I feel like they’re holding me back and preventing me from being productive. I’ve tried to suppress how I feel because it seems like these emotions are stopping me from accomplishing the things I need to do. Hearing your perspective has really helped me reflect on this. Thank you again!
I would love to start one but I genuinely have no idea how to do it and researching online confuses me even more 😭🥲 hopefully one day I’ll figure it out
Thank you for the tips. When journaling I use text to speech in my notes app instead of writing so I get it all out, or I just take a voice recording as well that I come back to listen to. Typing or writing I can’t keep up with the thoughts that come up. Hopefully this helps someone else, learn to love the journey
@@aks5614 I guess for me I get all my thoughts out as if I blacked out for a minute and have a trilogy to read and forgot what I have said lol. If in figuring anything out, it is nothing is weird and it’s all limitless in a way to possibilities of things
I have just discovered that I'm avoiding my emotions and started researching how to process them. This is the first video I encountered that offers a detailed way to overcome this harmful coping mechanism and I'm really grateful to you. Thank you so muchh
I really like the tip about looking at the emotion chart. I often find it hard to articulate what emotions I’m feeling, so I’ll definitely have to try it and see if it helps me express what I’m feeling in a clearer manner to those I talk to😊 Thank you!
Just wanted to say Thank you! For some reason, i just couldn't really "get" it when i read/heard other explanations of this process, but i understand a lot better now. Just want you to know that you're really helping people and we really appreciate it!
yess according to buddhism, meditating in total silence is the real meditation. It’s you vs your thoughts. That’s when the emotions will appear all over your mind.
I’ve noticed lately I’ve distracting myself instead of feeling what I need to… I used to do so well about acknowledging my feelings and letting me sit with them. I’m not sure what changed in my life but I needed this video. Thank you ❤
thank you for this. really needed it at the right time. healing my inner child can be very overwhelming sometimes. sending love and healing energy to everyone!
Thank you for sharing these coping skills. I love that you mentioned the uncomfortable feelings get lighter each time they come up if we dealt with them correctly. Wonderful video!
I focus too much on the fact that the people i care about and give my attention to, perceives me as optimistic, happy, hyper, funny individual at all times. When moments appear where i do start to go through stuff, i most of the time tend to repress or bottle my those emotions and find distractions because moments when i'm vulnerable because i recently went through something, the people close to me handle me with direct confrontation instead of comforting which can result in me feeling more than drained than ever. I can handle criticism and being confronted in general just except when i'm vulnerable.
Tell them you need them to switch gears when you’ve had a bad day If they can’t try or don’t care after they know that, they’re not your friends, you’re their entertainment
When we can release having any concern with others think or feel or say about us, then you are truly free. Even illness or any ailment in the body can dissipate because of that. Because the physical self must match up with what's going on with our inner thoughts and feelings because we are energy frequency and vibration. Because you will never be able to control how others see you... because they can ONLY see you from the lens they are seeing THEMselves in at that particular moment, when you happen to be in their vicinity. It will always be projected on you, how they are feeling. We are not responsible for that nor should we manipulate their feelings by behaving in any particular ways. Otherwise that makes us the manipulator in the end. Leave others do whatever they want to feel think or say because that will reveal to you what's going on within them. If you keep your focus outside of yourself you are robbing yourself of your own life and creating your own sense of self from the inside out, in the healthy ways that your inner child wants to.❤
I'm so thankful for this video. I have asked so many people this question and I can never seem to get a sufficient answer. Your video changed that with actionable steps that are spelled out without being condescending. Thank you!
Honestly till now I didn't understand why I had so much anger within me but listening to you I'm realizing it's how I managed and avoided it. This video was really helpful for me thank you
To anyone who is passing by, I need some advice. Here is my story. I'm going through a lot of things recently. First off, I've always been social anxiety and a stutterer my whole life, and I didn't face it until recently. I started to show up for myself, like I'm trying to speak my mind and express my feelings more even if I might stutter on some words. I'm trying to face the fear of being judged. Secondly, I was hit by lazy eye, so I was going to the hospital to train my eye muscles and was looking for a job at the same time, and this week, I just got a job offer so I'm being worried if I can wear an eye patch to work because my doctor said I have to cover my bad eye for months until my eye muscles can get stronger. I don't know how to process these feelings. It's like something in my life got better and worse at the same time. I guess this is the fear of change and fear of being judged.
you dont have to be ashamed for a medical condition, everyone can face some condition and thats ok. i can remember beating myself up for having bad teeth in spite of good hygiene, though others have brittle bones that easily break due to their genes, others have to get their heart screened every year, all of that you would never know if noone told you. try not to defend your eye thing, you are wearing an eye patch due to personal reasons for a few months and thats it. you can do it!
@user-rv3ce8xs5y Thank you !. My condition has gotten better, and I just have to wear an eye patch when I'm at home. I still see double vision on some days, but it doesn't affect my life much as before.
Acknowledge and name the emotion (can take help from the emotions chart). Pause and notice if you're avoiding dealing with your feelings. Sit in silence with no distractions to hear your own thoughts. Reflect on your day. Receive positive validation. Don't justify your feelings. You will be triggered by trauma in the future but hopefully, the intensity reduces over time. Take steps to protect yourself from situations or people that keep triggering you Healthy coping mechanisms: mind is free but body is busy. Exercise, journal, craft, walk without distractions, cleaning, shower, sleep.
I am autistic and I had bullies for a family. This is so helpful for my healing process, I've been learning as much as I can to avoid avoiding the difficult subject of feelings. Its been a journey of self discovery from learning that I had emotions at age 24, to age 31 where the best ways to process them is my top priority once I found that there is a whole world I've missed out on since I can remember.
wow!! Thanks for sharing this amazing knowledge of yours! I experienced ptsd as a young age, and started my therapy in my teens. I had ups and downs in my early 20s then recently I found a peace in my mind. Since I had my therapy young, luckily I embodied the way to process my emotions but never was able to explain exactly “how” to someone who needs help. I got to understand how I do it haha by your video! You are spreading so much love, thanks again❤️
This is what I 've been trying to ask therapists but they're like if you talk about your triggers and feelings enough times then you'll get magically fix cause you understand yourself better. And I'm like trust me I knooow me. I know what makes me anxious and I know why and I know where it stands from (most times) but it feels kinda like default settings now HOW DO I CHANGE THAT. So thank you so much for providing this "How to" that make healing actually plausible.
This is such an important message and one that took me many years of anxiety and therapy to figure out! 10 years of chronic anxiety that just got worse and worse, became a hermit, hardly left the house, never went out with friends. Then I learned to process all of the things that had happened to me and my adult life truly began. A little tip/suggestion from me: If you don't have anyone to talk to, try talking to yourself in the mirror. I started doing this when I was in therapy a few years ago and going through a difficult time. My therapist thought it was a great idea! Once you get into it you can get a bit carried away as there's no one there to interject, however, this is how I work through a lot of stuff and also how I figure out what I want to say to people if they've upset me in some way.
I am speechless.. this is one of the best videos I have ever seen on here on a topic like that! And you are so well-spoken and at the same time clear and to the point - PLUS you put things into words that... I don't know, II feel we are the same person hearing you talk about writing things down immeadiately making it "too real" or somehow manifest it as well as the thing with listening to something not to distract but because I don't feel safe just thinking my thoughts in silence
Someone appreciated the shirt slay!! Tysm for commenting and why would anyone gatekeep this haha! The world would be so much better if we all processed our feelings❤❤
Thank you so much for sharing. Seeing a wheel of emotions for the first time literally made me cry. There were so many feelings I thought were sadness that are actually anger.
Step 1 is always the hardest for me. I'm much better at recognizing my emotions after months of retrospection, but at the time, I just get lost in the sauce. Thinking about the concept of the problem and the solution are not separate entities, so once you identify the problem, the solution becomes clear. Once I am able to recognize that I'm lost in the sauce, the solution (i.e. healthy coping mechanism) is not so difficult to grasp. Thanks for being a really great friend to us!💞
Brilliant video and advice. Thank you so much for putting yourself and the knowledge out there! I just wrote down all the points in my mother language in bright colours. I will hang it up on my walls and see how that goes! I still feel shame around processing my emotions with others because I feel like I need it much much more often and deeper than many other people. I am so proud of my younger self tho having built loving relationships where I can do excactly that and feel safe. At the moment, I am home alone a lot with overwhelming tasks and hope to find some more grounding in the healthy coping mechanisms you listed. At the moment, I often go to youtube for hours because I'm too tired or bored of working through things on my own, which can leave me frustrated. I'll have to find soft loving approaches to cope that work for me. For example, just starting to move intuitively and stretch a little or getting up to get some water to drink. For anyone that read that, thank you, I hope we'll feel less alone and I hope you'll be blessed. ❤️
Just found you less than 10 seconds your voice instantly calmed me the title instantly caught my attention and it's right on time from a question I had within myself. Love you Girl ❤
I've always had to conceal my emotions when I'm around people and smile like a jooly fellow. When i react or act different, people ask me why I'm being moody or I indirectly wasn't acting as strong or as happy as they expect me to be. And when i get angry it's so hard to let go of, i don't have anger issues but i just can't forget the anger when someone cuts me off from their life because i think deep down I'm hurt about. I'll definitely download this video, thank you.
The idea of sitting in silence honestly scares me. I know by that alone is that I probably need to but the anxiety I felt when you said sit in absolute silence I feel like there’s so much that would come up to the surface and not sure I’d be able to put them away to continue with my day
I subscribed. This was surprisingly calming, I know all that advice but sometimes I just shut down and stop processing everything, not my feelings and not my thoughts. I'm a young teen but I've been going through so much of identity crisis this year and displaying wide variety of symptoms, in the next two weeks I'm hoping I'll be finally visiting a therapist but I'm still trying to work on it on my own. Thank you for sharing, this helped.
i 've just come across your video and the first thing i thought it's gonna be one of the videos that i just watch and not really get anything out of it because everyone says the same thing, the same thing that doesn't really gets to me that i don't really understand and that doesn't really works for me like drink more water sleep more become a BETTER version etc. But even though i i had those thoughts i saw your youtube channel name and idk something just drawn me to it ( i think it was the 707 from nana ( i love nana)). SO i just wanted to say that the way you talk about the topic is really clear and not overwhelming and you really helped me and i can surely say that your video helped me! thank you for creating and helping others!
this helped a lot. thank you so much. i always felt the need to justify my emotions, in fear i was being petty or simply weak. this was reassuring to hear, thank you :")
i feel so seen after watching this video. thank you for making this. im going to use these. im just going through it and this was much needed. thank you!
The problem I currently have mainly shows up on romantic relationships. I overthink too much and have an anxious attachment. But if I think back to my childhood, I can’t remember being neglected or abandoned. And when I remember the bad stuff that happened to me in my childhood, I’m never completely sure that it actually happened. I tend to think that I don’t really know my past and most of my memories are false. It’s hard to give this emotion a name, other than ‘anxiety’.
1. It could have been in infancy so you wouldn’t be able to remember that I don’t think. 2. It could also have been someone else (not your parents) who abandoned you or another trauma that’s not as obviously seen as abandonment (like moving and losing all your friends for example)
@@girlinroom707 “like moving and losing all your friends”… yeah, that kinda strikes home. I moved to the US when I was 10, and than moved back to my country 2 years later. I still have my friends from my original country, but I no longer have any friends from the US (aside from family). Though I never thought that could cause a “wound”
I’ve been struggling with feelings of hopelessness, depression, and worthlessness for two years now, over some stupid guy, that didn’t give a shit about me…. I’m finally ready to start healing and doing better… I look forward to watching all your videos & improving myself however possible. Thank you, in advance 💜
Just came across this in my feed. The fact that I have to go through this alone sometimes, is exhausting. I will try to do this. I am just stuck in this abyss of me spiraling again and again
I never really thought about how important knowing how to process emotions was. Society just expects people to know how to process emotions since they come up so naturally, and we are never explicitly taught how to do this. But the tips you provided just felt so helpful. Especially the one about reflecting on your day; there are just so many things going on in life that we never acknowledge, and they can wear us down without us knowing if we don't address them. I will definitely use some of these tips. Thank you!
Glad to hear it, and thank you so much for commenting ❤
You’re so right! Emotions come up naturally but it’s doesn’t come natural to us to process them unless we learn
Absolutely. Parents don't teach us because they were not taught, and without feelings, you cannot shift your vibrational frequency at create everything you've ever desired. We are energy frequency and vibration and emotions are energy and motion. When we are drop down into the body and pay more attention than being up in our thoughts which have been programmed throughout the years..... we connect back to our power that we had when we were children.❤ when we allow emotions to flow through our energy centers without blockage, we clear up any illness and disease that we created within ourselves. Repressed emotions and spiritual blockages are the cause of us and disease, if we don't love ourselves enough then we're not aware of what we're putting in our bodies and what chemicals and toxins are around us, but low vibrational people Etc, because we have created our own reality and brought to us everything that's ever shown up, every person every situation and every opportunity.. all of that carries a frequency. That's how powerful we are ;-)
I heard "you're too sensitive" my whole childhood from my family. It has definitely affected me my whole life.
Same here. But in order for us to become healthy and stronger mentally we have to acknowledge the ugly emotions and actions that affect us . Like the girl in this video said, accumulating emotions eventually makes you break. So ironically in order for us to not be weak we have to actually acknowledge emotions and process them. Your family are assholes and they are the weak ones. I’m sorry you had to go through that.
Felt. Makes me inclined to allow my emotions to pile up to avoid feeling aka “being sensitive”
You're an empath/HSP
Same.
My mom said this to me all the time after hurting my feelings. Made me dissociate from my emotions. Had to cut her off.
Steps:
1. Acknowledge and name the emotion
2. Pause and notice - don't avoid emotion or use distractions
3. Sit in silence for 5 mins.
4. Reflect on your day 5 mins before sleep
5. Emotional chart- name the emotion
6. Don't justify your feeling
7. Moving forward- the feeling may come up again but it will less intensive every consecutive time.
Feel empowered for acknowledging and resolving your feelings.
Have an healthy coping mechanism: exercise/ journaling/ talking to therapist, partner, friend/ walking/ pursue hobby/ shower/sleep.
beautiful summary, thank you 💚
Sounds fuckin stupid tbh
As an autistic person. This is absolutely NOT helpful . At alllllll
@@Abishhhhhim autistic and i draw emotional intelligence and you've inspired my next diagram
@@Abishhhhh Idk, autistic people all operate just as different as everyone else. I'm autistic too and I don't think your autism is what makes this unhelpful for you. It's just your personality, your method of processing being different. No one said this was the Only Way
Emotional intelligence classes should be a thing. It’s even academically justifiable because it could get into other subjects like science, the arts, and business interpersonal skills.
I couldn’t agree more
Yeah why isn't this a thing yet?
Look up Daniel Goleman. It's exactly what he says we should be doing. Lessons in emotional intelligence, who am and where do I come from, family constellations, if we taught this, the world would literally be a better place for it. Society - especially after the disconnect of corona - needs a massive course correction.
It wasn't considered a topic for a class because, scientifically speaking, a child learns the emotional regulation techniques by copying the methods their parent is using. For example, if a 6 yo gets hurt, they look at adults nearby, and copy their reaction to what happened. Thus, it is expected that all children will have emotional regulation and emotional processing learned from their parents.
Unfortunately, not all parents know healthy ways of emotional processing, and tend to pass their trauma down the generations - and there's a lot of trauma passed down after ww1 and ww2, at least in the western cultures. Plus, it is more common for both parents to be at work most of the day, so they can't be around to address the child's emotional needs as before.
Thus, the emotional regulations skills are in such a sorry state right now. It would be nice if they were taught in school to fix this gap, yeah.
My mom teaches social emotional learning to k-12 kids! A lot of schools are actually starting to implement it into their curriculum and I’m so jealous I didn’t have this when I was younger
I remember the first time I just let my anxiety course through me instead of trying to explain it or suppress it. I placed a hand on my chest and allowed my heart to beat rapidly until it finally calmed down. Afterward it was a lot easier to take myself out of anxiety spirals before they even started. In my childhood I was shamed for expressing distress despite it being an appropriate response to trauma I was experiencing. Being able to process negative emotions is essential for my mental wellbeing.
Isn't it wonderful? I'm blocking the energy centers is so important.... breathing and allowing the flow❤ trusting and surrendering. There is nothing to fear, there is only love.
From the perspective of someone a little older, if you’re working on any of this stuff in your 20s, and think that you’re behind in any way, I definitely want to let you know that you absolutely are NOT. ❤ There are so many people who continually go throughout their lives never addressing this stuff, even though it massively affects both them, and how they interact with the world around them. They still just flatly refuse to go anywhere near the issue. I say all this to say, just working on these things at all, and especially at such a young age, is incredibly commendable. And, you’re actually quite ahead in life to be looking at them now, so you should definitely take pride in your self awareness and your decisions, because it is not easy.
Aw thank you for this 🥹
thank you! your mssge warms my soul
this made me feel better thank u
I couldn't have said it better. I'm 45 I wish I had this video when I was 23. Keep up the good work
I'm very encouraged by this as someone who feels massively behind from not learning how to be secure from childhood. Thank you for your kind words, and I wish you prosperity and contentment on your journey 🫂✌️
commenting for the algorithm bc this was actually so helpful + practical! like people always say that you have to process your emotions & not avoid them in order to heal but i'm not sure i've ever heard anyone spell out exactly how to do that, or at least not in a way that's stuck with me. i think this video is one that i'll think of often moving forward :)
Tysm for commenting it means the world❤
Doing the same thing
I was in therapy for several years with an EMDR therapist.... oddly enough, she never taught me anything about how to actually process an emotion. I spent hundreds of sessions digging through my childhood trauma, but just intellectualizing everything and continuing to bottle and avoid because it felt bad. Fast forward to now, and I can tell my body kept score all those years
Did you read The body keeps the score? It sounds like you did that book is amazing
@@girlinroom707 I have read bits of it, yes!
i'm so glad this popped up on my recommended. i recently was struggling with processing anger and expressing it a non-destructive healthy way. I used to believe that i wasn't an angry person and that i could never be angry, but i think i was doing myself a disservice but not allowing myself to feel those heavy and hard emotions. once i started acknowledging that anger is within everyone and is a completely normal feeling to have, i feel like my perspective on life and how to manage my emotions changed for the better. it allowed me to be accepting of myself, and because of it, i've found ways to express my anger and cope with these heavy emotions in a way that works for me, isn't destructive, and doesn't push away people that mean the most to me. you can do it!
Anger is a valid emotion. I could talk forever about this but anger is a sign that your boundaries are being disrespected and violated. Expressing frustration is super important!
I start to cry when I get angry
The " best dad" shirt " set the tone of calnmness. 😅😄
I Knowwwwww, right?!!!! I SO love that she wears that shirt! And had the cahoonahs (sp?) to buy it for herself in the first place!! #ImSoHereForIt
The shirt is why I'm watching this
Yeah, shower talk and shower CRY are such a relief!!!
I'm a BIG believer in a good shower cry
Absolutely LOVED this topic. It's unfair how a lot of ppl may feel shame for expressing themselves (myself included, but we're getting there whoo). Im actually really big on ppl giving and receiving a proper apology because that to me is one way how you show someone you're sincere about the way you made them feel, no matter how small like you said.
I don't wanna make this too long, but thank you for sharing your thoughts and input on this topic. It's an eye-opener and feels comforting to know others are going through the same thing, and see these issues being talked about. Keep up the amazing work!💙
Absolutely! Accountability should be included in every apology. Glad you enjoyed the topic and tysm for commenting ❤
The emotion chart is a game changer. Thanks for sharing these wonderful tips to make living easier!
You don’t know how happy I am this video is reaching people 🙏🏻💚
i rly love the fact that this video includes so much actual advice, techniques and ways to actually put into action getting better. so many self-help videos just use vague quotes and feelings but don't explain how to actually deal in the moment.
I have this video saved because it really helped me. I had a bad experience this weekend, cried, disassociated, went into flight mode and have not taken care of it. Thank you for making this video so I can come back and deal with it
I’m sooo glad I was able to help you even in the smallest way. Feel better ! 🩵
Everybody talk about processing emotions but nobody tells how to actually do it, its like they don't know it themselves and just repeats it, because its 'important'. Thank you so much for providing the knowledge to us! I wondered if you can heal yourself without therapy. I will make sure to follow what you've said in order to process my own trauma that i've been dealing with for a while and I acknowledged it but haven't done anything about it. Thanks again
you should still consider therapy if it’s possible for you, but in the meantime using public knowledge from the internet can be super helpful too !
OMG i have been in therapy for 10 years with cptsd and this has been the most helpful thing anyone has told me so far. I have been asking how to process emotions for years and no therapist has answered that question, nor have I seen this online. No one tells you HOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
the more experience i get in therapy (3+ years) the more frustrated i get when i observe friends constantly intellectualizing their emotions and projecting them all over the place ~ it's been helpful to pull out the feeling wheel with friends! really smart people aren't necessarily emotionally intelligent
I love this. It took me over 15 years of therapy to love myself enough to let my body process emotions. This year, at 30, after going one year sober, and after breaking up with what I thought was the love of my life, I finally held myself in my own arms and said "I'm proud of you. You're doing the right thing". Devestating, but so liberating. I always thought I was very emotionally mature. I would intelectualize everything, talk about it to no end, but never actually process any of it. It hits like a ton of bricks when you get there, but now crying feels like a release and not a catastrophy.
this video is genuinely life changing i do not understand why they don't teach this more in schools or anywhere because dear lord why am i just learning about these. it's like unspoken rules people forgot to tell. thank you so much for this.
8:41 hit me. I constantly feel that im always in the wrong for setting boundaries. And its been hard to regulate my emotions. Thus video is God sent. Thanks sm.
This was actually so helpful to listen to… I’ve only started thinking about emotions this way very recently (like this year) and the way you put it all together makes a lot of sense. Bookmarking for sure
I’m so glad and thankful to hear this! Tysm for commenting !!❤
Subscribed. I've had over 20 years of trauma thanks to my family; and even though i go for therapy, I've realised there's so much self work to be done. I have no idea what emotions I feel (my go-to is any kind of distraction) because I didn't have the space to emote as a child. Thank you for this video. This is just the beginning of my journey.
Kinda just proves how bad most therapists are that they don't really have any advice on how to do this, either. Like, you've got to do it yourself, but isn't the whole point that they're supposed to help you along?
FYI generally basic meditation practices ARE just sitting with your thoughts and emotions you're supposed to let whatever comes up come up. What's advised is to learn to pull your "mental spotlight" back a bit so rather than being trapped within those emotions you can... observe them from a distance. That does NOT mean not feeling them, but ultimately it's the reason for the concept of "not-self" or whatever, you are not your feelings because there isn't a you, not perceptually, just stuff that's happening and an observer. It's hard to explain but it DOES make this process easier.
I wasn’t trying to teach people to meditate all I wanted was for them to even notice what they’re feeling yk? but Ty for sharing !
To me, meditation falls short, however, depending on which technique. I find it's vital to let the body speak and calm itself down in the process. Meditation can be strenuous with trying to let thoughts go. As Yung Pueblo also explains, thoughts have their origins in the body, and just letting things be brings you into being and feeling, not being your emotions.
i agree. I've been there
@@girlinroom707sitting in silence is basically meditation.
Yes there are different type of meditations like vipassana but she said guided meditation like the videos that speak to you
This is exactly what I did to clear out an abandonment trigger... Instead of reacting we must stop and breathe .. The body's waiting for us to acknowledge it because it's held it in and kept score since we were children. People are so afraid of feeling the pain of the emotion because they remember it from childhood they don't realize that they are the one adult now in charge and not powerless and can redirect and clear it through the energy centers. And allow it to flow out and release the blockage, once we trust and surrender❤
The best way to learn to pause is by starting meditative practices because you learn to observe your thoughts, and stop believing them or acting on them. The world has been deliberately created as a matrix to distract control and enslave us because we have reactive triggers, to what's on the news for example.... just because it's their doesn't mean we have to believe it or act on it. Breathing and responding from our own internal guidance is how you take your power back. But it stems from a lot of toxic and dysfunctional family patterns and cycles that are inner child needs to heal from, otherwise we repeat the patterns with our jobs our employers, our partners friends etcetera. We attract and create our own external world that is mimicking how we feel internally.
Energy healing and sound healing is great for the body as well, because it's about unblocking energy centers, the chakras... we are energy frequency and vibrational beings first and foremost❤
in meditation you receive the answers you seek.. because you have learned to detach from the external world and especially family members or others thoughts and feelings because they are not ours and they have nothing to do with us, and never did. They can only merely reflect externally what's going on within them at any given moment. Just as we do.
crafts is such a good way to release emotions! during my most stressful moments, i break out my gouache paints or ipad procreate or just a sketchbook, and the feeling of creating takes the sting out of whatever burden i carry. another activity that surprisingly helps is driving lol, i find it relaxing because i'm occupied and i'm also getting somewhere (i usually drive slow and just for a coffee in my neighbourhood, my mind likes to wander when i wait for red lights)
Wow wow wow!!! It’s almost as though you just rifled through my journal. A journal which only came into existence when I started to realise that I wasn’t processing my emotions properly. Processing is such a key and fundamental word and I, like you, came to the realisation through learning from my own experiences and reflecting. Can’t even tell you how much good this entire thing has done my mind and body and will continue to. My one piece of advice would be for everyone to remember that you’re not going to be brilliant at processing your emotions straight away. It isn’t a magic fix, but a journey. You’ll ‘back-slide’ and have times (that may be a day, it may be a month, or longer) you go through without processing your emotions properly. But that’s okay. It’s part of it. And once you identify it, it just goes to show that you’ve made progress. Each time, you’ll get better at identifying things and these emotions will not become less, or non-existent, but you will be better equipped to handle them each time.
thank you so much for helping people, this can be a hard and weird issue to tackle, & it’s so appreciated.❤️ people can always change if they choose to act in their own highest good, and move with integrity; helping yourself and choosing to do the work: is magic working upon your own life.
God bless you🥰❤️
I'm glad UA-cam randomly recommends me this video and I clicked it and watched it til the end. It's very organized and helpful. As now I'm waiting for my first therapy session, I'm gonna try these tips to help me go through these weeks of waiting. Thank you for the sharing!
Proud of you for going to therapy, dear!
Great service you are providing! You are sound. Universally proper. You are a breath of fresh air. If you are doing this now, imagine what you will do in 15 years. The information is helpful and you are pleasing to watch. Keep it up young woman got a bright future ahead of you!
You're amazing beyond words and this helped me so much I'm still processing the fact that I didn't know about any of this my entire life. I'll be applying alllll of these because literally each thing you said resonates and really hit the nail, I'm so so so grateful to have come across your video ❤ God bless you!!! I'm looking forward to learning more from you. This changed everything for me
This is a video that hit the spot right on.
I love how it is just you, in your room without any loud background noise. Only subtitles and titles in the screen to make it easier to follow the words you are saying.
I don't know if you know how impactful your video can be for several people around the world.
How you structured your sentences are well chosen to get the message across that you wanted.
I am happy to see many people trying to break the cycle of numbing every emotion down and I am proud to say that I am one of the people who tries.
Bless your soul!❤
Processing emotions and suppressing emotions are not mutually exclusive. Emotions and thoughts can be suppressed temporarily and processed later on. This is especially useful to get work done or to enjoy social events.
“Suppressing emotions” is a loose phrase that can mean multiple things:
1. Avoiding analyzing the internal emotions.
2. Avoiding talking about the internal pain externally.
3. Avoiding feeling the internal pain.
4. Avoiding external emotional expressions of internal pain: i.e. crying, screaming, etc.
*We should generally analyze the internal pain to an extent. How much we should analyze the internal pain varies from person to person and day to day.
*Sometimes we should talk about the situation to others depending on the person and situation.
*After some processing, we should force ourselves into healthy, leisurely activities and/or work. How much and when we should force ourselves varies from person to person and day to day.
*We should rarely hold back from crying as crying will reduce the suffering, even just temporarily.
Analyzing or talking about the internal pain is different from analyzing or talking about the external problem.
Emotions are not toothpaste in a bottle. After we process them, they often come flooding back later.
Often times bringing negative unconscious thoughts to the conscious level (“surfacing”) will trouble people significantly more than they did when they were unconscious.
It’s crucial to find a balance where emotions are acknowledged and dealt with without getting stuck in a cycle of rumination.
the sitting for 5 minutes is pretty much medetation, you pay attention to what thoughts appear when you dont have anything distracting you from your emotions
I have to go all the way back to this video, to tell you how much it has changed my last few weeks... I have practiced the 5 minutes every day completely in solitude and OMG... being able to hear my thoughts and feel my body is such a life changer. I even made a mindmap to summarize your video and drew the whole emotions chart down in my notebook haha. Anw... just want to say thank you sm for sharing your knowledge here online
Omg you’re doing amazing I’m so glad u could help
thanks. Knew my heart felt horrible but when i addressed with microscopic detail why, and the person who hurt me it stopped hurting. The anxiety of being “in trouble” subsided substantially.
I’m so glad to hear that ur doing better 🫶🏻
Writing something down doesnt mean its gonna manifest. More you write the chaos down, less power it has over you. Basically you put your thoughts under objective analisis by writing them down or saying them out loud. I use to think i will manifest bad things if i say them or give them much thought, but it doesnt work that way. Its the intent that manifests. Your intent is to get to know you, be there for you and have a catharsis, this is what it is. This is what you manifest. We dont manifest what we say, this is media gurus bs they go around saying and actually causing fear. This is blocking your from releasing emotions. Its a real block. Most emotions are blocked by fear so you then need to deal with fear first. Write those thoughts down over and over again. This is how they lose power. Here we manifest what we fundemantally believe in, not what we say thought by thought. And if we believe something that doesnt suit us to manifest, the best way for it to lose power over you is shedding light on it and writing it down. This why it doesnt need to manifest for you to give it attention. The reason bad stuff manifests is because we refuse to become aware and then the reflection needs to become so aware we have no choice but to face it. The quality of our life is dependent on the willingness to face the negative emotions and thoughts when they are pebbles, so they dont turn into rocks we have to dig ourselves under. You had no support processing your emotions and feel unsafe to do it. My upbringing left the same issue, but sooner you realize it sooner you will be able to dive deeper into the emotion so it can be processed without resistance. In the meantime its a good idea to hold yourself during the fear without trying to think of anything. Lately its been said naming the emotion does nothing but take you from feeling to thinking, which is a form of resistance. Feel and process without the need to name it. That way it reveals itself at the core even or.
WOW! thank you for this I do journal but this video explains so much why journal helps me to process my thoughts. Journal, reading bible and pray - this three is a big help for me to fight my negative thoughts.
Hi, I just want to say that I really love your voice and the way you speak. Your choice of words is so thoughtful and impactful. Do you happen to have a podcast on Spotify? If you don't, I genuinely think you should consider starting one-I’d absolutely listen to it!
Also, thank you so much for the advice. It’s been incredibly helpful, especially since I’ve been struggling to deal with my emotions lately. I’ve been avoiding them because I feel like they’re holding me back and preventing me from being productive. I’ve tried to suppress how I feel because it seems like these emotions are stopping me from accomplishing the things I need to do. Hearing your perspective has really helped me reflect on this. Thank you again!
I would love to start one but I genuinely have no idea how to do it and researching online confuses me even more 😭🥲 hopefully one day I’ll figure it out
Thank you for the tips. When journaling I use text to speech in my notes app instead of writing so I get it all out, or I just take a voice recording as well that I come back to listen to. Typing or writing I can’t keep up with the thoughts that come up. Hopefully this helps someone else, learn to love the journey
omg i used to talk to myself aloud to process emotions but i felt so crazy lol 😭😭😭 it can be very calming vocalising it feels so much more real
@@aks5614 I guess for me I get all my thoughts out as if I blacked out for a minute and have a trilogy to read and forgot what I have said lol. If in figuring anything out, it is nothing is weird and it’s all limitless in a way to possibilities of things
I have just discovered that I'm avoiding my emotions and started researching how to process them. This is the first video I encountered that offers a detailed way to overcome this harmful coping mechanism and I'm really grateful to you. Thank you so muchh
Uahl!! What an extensive description, perfect, covering multiple scenarios, I'm saving this video for life. Espetacular!
This gives me so much hope seeing such a young person put this out into the world
the way you describe processing the healthy coping mechanisms, such as journaling and walking is so relatable, wow.
I really like the tip about looking at the emotion chart. I often find it hard to articulate what emotions I’m feeling, so I’ll definitely have to try it and see if it helps me express what I’m feeling in a clearer manner to those I talk to😊
Thank you!
So glad you found something helpful out of this video! ❤
Great video, short simple and to the point, while still including examples. Thank you for sharing!
Just wanted to say Thank you! For some reason, i just couldn't really "get" it when i read/heard other explanations of this process, but i understand a lot better now.
Just want you to know that you're really helping people and we really appreciate it!
I’m so happy to hear that😭🫶🏻
This is incredibly helpful. You've structured and explained these things in a way that made a lot of sense to me. Thank you!
yess according to buddhism, meditating in total silence is the real meditation. It’s you vs your thoughts. That’s when the emotions will appear all over your mind.
I’ve noticed lately I’ve distracting myself instead of feeling what I need to… I used to do so well about acknowledging my feelings and letting me sit with them. I’m not sure what changed in my life but I needed this video. Thank you ❤
thank you for this. really needed it at the right time. healing my inner child can be very overwhelming sometimes. sending love and healing energy to everyone!
Wow. Genuinely one of the most useful self help videos I’ve ever watched. I need to take actual notes.
Bro just summed up 9 months of therapy in less then 13 minutes 🎉❤😊 BIG THANK YOU!!
this was genuinely so helpful, you have no idea.
Thank you for sharing these coping skills. I love that you mentioned the uncomfortable feelings get lighter each time they come up if we dealt with them correctly. Wonderful video!
I focus too much on the fact that the people i care about and give my attention to, perceives me as optimistic, happy, hyper, funny individual at all times. When moments appear where i do start to go through stuff, i most of the time tend to repress or bottle my those emotions and find distractions because moments when i'm vulnerable because i recently went through something, the people close to me handle me with direct confrontation instead of comforting which can result in me feeling more than drained than ever. I can handle criticism and being confronted in general just except when i'm vulnerable.
Tell them you need them to switch gears when you’ve had a bad day
If they can’t try or don’t care after they know that, they’re not your friends, you’re their entertainment
When we can release having any concern with others think or feel or say about us, then you are truly free. Even illness or any ailment in the body can dissipate because of that. Because the physical self must match up with what's going on with our inner thoughts and feelings because we are energy frequency and vibration.
Because you will never be able to control how others see you... because they can ONLY see you from the lens they are seeing THEMselves in at that particular moment, when you happen to be in their vicinity. It will always be projected on you, how they are feeling. We are not responsible for that nor should we manipulate their feelings by behaving in any particular ways. Otherwise that makes us the manipulator in the end. Leave others do whatever they want to feel think or say because that will reveal to you what's going on within them. If you keep your focus outside of yourself you are robbing yourself of your own life and creating your own sense of self from the inside out, in the healthy ways that your inner child wants to.❤
damn bro same
I'm so thankful for this video. I have asked so many people this question and I can never seem to get a sufficient answer. Your video changed that with actionable steps that are spelled out without being condescending. Thank you!
Honestly till now I didn't understand why I had so much anger within me but listening to you I'm realizing it's how I managed and avoided it. This video was really helpful for me thank you
To anyone who is passing by, I need some advice. Here is my story. I'm going through a lot of things recently. First off, I've always been social anxiety and a stutterer my whole life, and I didn't
face it until recently. I started to show up for myself, like I'm trying to speak my mind and express my feelings more even if I might stutter on some words. I'm trying to face the fear of being judged. Secondly, I was hit by lazy eye, so I was going to the hospital to train my eye muscles and was looking for a job at the same time, and this week, I just got a job offer so I'm being worried if I can wear an eye patch to work because my doctor said I have to cover my bad eye for
months until my eye muscles can get stronger. I don't know how to process these feelings. It's like something in my life got better and worse at the same time. I guess this is the fear of change and fear of being judged.
you can do it! ♥️
you dont have to be ashamed for a medical condition, everyone can face some condition and thats ok. i can remember beating myself up for having bad teeth in spite of good hygiene, though others have brittle bones that easily break due to their genes, others have to get their heart screened every year, all of that you would never know if noone told you. try not to defend your eye thing, you are wearing an eye patch due to personal reasons for a few months and thats it. you can do it!
@user-rv3ce8xs5y Thank you !. My condition has gotten better, and I just have to wear an eye patch when I'm at home. I still see double vision on some days, but it doesn't affect my life much as before.
@@K.etanak thanks for updating. i just saw your answer. thats good to hear. all the best
Acknowledge and name the emotion (can take help from the emotions chart). Pause and notice if you're avoiding dealing with your feelings. Sit in silence with no distractions to hear your own thoughts. Reflect on your day.
Receive positive validation. Don't justify your feelings. You will be triggered by trauma in the future but hopefully, the intensity reduces over time. Take steps to protect yourself from situations or people that keep triggering you
Healthy coping mechanisms: mind is free but body is busy. Exercise, journal, craft, walk without distractions, cleaning, shower, sleep.
I am autistic and I had bullies for a family. This is so helpful for my healing process, I've been learning as much as I can to avoid avoiding the difficult subject of feelings. Its been a journey of self discovery from learning that I had emotions at age 24, to age 31 where the best ways to process them is my top priority once I found that there is a whole world I've missed out on since I can remember.
I’m so sorry you went through a lot but it sounds like you’re managing it very well 💚
Wow! So helpful and informative. Thank you so much!
You are so welcome!💚
wow!! Thanks for sharing this amazing knowledge of yours!
I experienced ptsd as a young age, and started my therapy in my teens. I had ups and downs in my early 20s then recently I found a peace in my mind.
Since I had my therapy young, luckily I embodied the way to process my emotions but never was able to explain exactly “how” to someone who needs help.
I got to understand how I do it haha by your video! You are spreading so much love, thanks again❤️
This is what I 've been trying to ask therapists but they're like if you talk about your triggers and feelings enough times then you'll get magically fix cause you understand yourself better. And I'm like trust me I knooow me. I know what makes me anxious and I know why and I know where it stands from (most times) but it feels kinda like default settings now HOW DO I CHANGE THAT. So thank you so much for providing this "How to" that make healing actually plausible.
Simple. To the point. Lean. Excellent.
This is such an important message and one that took me many years of anxiety and therapy to figure out! 10 years of chronic anxiety that just got worse and worse, became a hermit, hardly left the house, never went out with friends. Then I learned to process all of the things that had happened to me and my adult life truly began.
A little tip/suggestion from me: If you don't have anyone to talk to, try talking to yourself in the mirror. I started doing this when I was in therapy a few years ago and going through a difficult time. My therapist thought it was a great idea! Once you get into it you can get a bit carried away as there's no one there to interject, however, this is how I work through a lot of stuff and also how I figure out what I want to say to people if they've upset me in some way.
Me making UA-cam videos is basically that - talking to myself haha ! Thank you for the tip and the comment 💚
Me making UA-cam videos is basically that - talking to myself haha ! Thank you for the tip and the comment 💚
Thank you for summarizing your knowledge in such a good way like this video. Keep going
I needed this video right now, thank you, ❤
I am speechless.. this is one of the best videos I have ever seen on here on a topic like that! And you are so well-spoken and at the same time clear and to the point - PLUS you put things into words that... I don't know, II feel we are the same person hearing you talk about writing things down immeadiately making it "too real" or somehow manifest it as well as the thing with listening to something not to distract but because I don't feel safe just thinking my thoughts in silence
what a great sum up! thank you so much!!
thank you for not gatekeeping 🙏 youre so awesome 🫶🏼🫶🏼 love the shirt btw xd
Someone appreciated the shirt slay!! Tysm for commenting and why would anyone gatekeep this haha! The world would be so much better if we all processed our feelings❤❤
I really needed this today. Thank you !
this is just, incredibly helpful. thank you
Thank you so much for sharing. Seeing a wheel of emotions for the first time literally made me cry. There were so many feelings I thought were sadness that are actually anger.
Step 1 is always the hardest for me. I'm much better at recognizing my emotions after months of retrospection, but at the time, I just get lost in the sauce.
Thinking about the concept of the problem and the solution are not separate entities, so once you identify the problem, the solution becomes clear. Once I am able to recognize that I'm lost in the sauce, the solution (i.e. healthy coping mechanism) is not so difficult to grasp.
Thanks for being a really great friend to us!💞
currently doing DBT with my therapist and this video truly helped me! I need to learn how to process emotions. Thank you❤
Brilliant video and advice. Thank you so much for putting yourself and the knowledge out there!
I just wrote down all the points in my mother language in bright colours. I will hang it up on my walls and see how that goes!
I still feel shame around processing my emotions with others because I feel like I need it much much more often and deeper than many other people. I am so proud of my younger self tho having built loving relationships where I can do excactly that and feel safe.
At the moment, I am home alone a lot with overwhelming tasks and hope to find some more grounding in the healthy coping mechanisms you listed. At the moment, I often go to youtube for hours because I'm too tired or bored of working through things on my own, which can leave me frustrated.
I'll have to find soft loving approaches to cope that work for me. For example, just starting to move intuitively and stretch a little or getting up to get some water to drink.
For anyone that read that, thank you, I hope we'll feel less alone and I hope you'll be blessed. ❤️
Wow tysm for sharing this. I’m proud of you too ! 💚
Thank you so much, means a lot ! 🧡
you broke this down so well. thanks for sharing!!
Just found you less than 10 seconds your voice instantly calmed me the title instantly caught my attention and it's right on time from a question I had within myself. Love you Girl ❤
I’m so glad ! Thank you for your kind words 💚
THANK YOU sm as a fellow cognitive science major, it's hardest to endure issues when they come to the self
I've always had to conceal my emotions when I'm around people and smile like a jooly fellow. When i react or act different, people ask me why I'm being moody or I indirectly wasn't acting as strong or as happy as they expect me to be. And when i get angry it's so hard to let go of, i don't have anger issues but i just can't forget the anger when someone cuts me off from their life because i think deep down I'm hurt about. I'll definitely download this video, thank you.
Girl, this is so true.
Thank you so much!
Thank you. So many people do not have access to therapy. You are a big help
Better than any therapists advice....Thankyou 🙏🙏
The idea of sitting in silence honestly scares me. I know by that alone is that I probably need to but the anxiety I felt when you said sit in absolute silence I feel like there’s so much that would come up to the surface and not sure I’d be able to put them away to continue with my day
Simply thank you 🙏
This should be way more popular. Thanks a lot, like really!
ive been waking up every morning telling myself i need to do this stuff but i jsu go on autopilot. its time to lock tf in. thank u for the push c:
I subscribed. This was surprisingly calming, I know all that advice but sometimes I just shut down and stop processing everything, not my feelings and not my thoughts. I'm a young teen but I've been going through so much of identity crisis this year and displaying wide variety of symptoms, in the next two weeks I'm hoping I'll be finally visiting a therapist but I'm still trying to work on it on my own.
Thank you for sharing, this helped.
i 've just come across your video and the first thing i thought it's gonna be one of the videos that i just watch and not really get anything out of it because everyone says the same thing, the same thing that doesn't really gets to me that i don't really understand and that doesn't really works for me like drink more water sleep more become a BETTER version etc. But even though i i had those thoughts i saw your youtube channel name and idk something just drawn me to it ( i think it was the 707 from nana ( i love nana)). SO i just wanted to say that the way you talk about the topic is really clear and not overwhelming and you really helped me and i can surely say that your video helped me! thank you for creating and helping others!
this helped a lot. thank you so much. i always felt the need to justify my emotions, in fear i was being petty or simply weak. this was reassuring to hear, thank you :")
Thank you for the nice reminders
i feel so seen after watching this video. thank you for making this. im going to use these. im just going through it and this was much needed. thank you!
Crying is also magical
The problem I currently have mainly shows up on romantic relationships. I overthink too much and have an anxious attachment. But if I think back to my childhood, I can’t remember being neglected or abandoned. And when I remember the bad stuff that happened to me in my childhood, I’m never completely sure that it actually happened. I tend to think that I don’t really know my past and most of my memories are false. It’s hard to give this emotion a name, other than ‘anxiety’.
1. It could have been in infancy so you wouldn’t be able to remember that I don’t think. 2. It could also have been someone else (not your parents) who abandoned you or another trauma that’s not as obviously seen as abandonment (like moving and losing all your friends for example)
@@girlinroom707 “like moving and losing all your friends”… yeah, that kinda strikes home. I moved to the US when I was 10, and than moved back to my country 2 years later. I still have my friends from my original country, but I no longer have any friends from the US (aside from family). Though I never thought that could cause a “wound”
@@dobledes ofc! It’s a big change esp for a child, since they usually get no choice on the matter
i am just grateful...i have not more to say
thank you
You’re so welcome, I’m happy to be helpful 💚
@@girlinroom707
I’ve been struggling with feelings of hopelessness, depression, and worthlessness for two years now, over some stupid guy, that didn’t give a shit about me…. I’m finally ready to start healing and doing better… I look forward to watching all your videos & improving myself however possible. Thank you, in advance 💜
Just came across this in my feed. The fact that I have to go through this alone sometimes, is exhausting. I will try to do this. I am just stuck in this abyss of me spiraling again and again
you don’t have to go through it alone! Reach out to a professional for help, or try to work on building a social circle
What a treat in my feed, thank you