She kinda has it flipped though. It’s not a song about futility it’s a song about challenging the establishment in saying humanity owns disorder. We can use our anger to create disorder to stop the status quo. It’s a rallying song for offense in the face of fascism.
@@brentsalem3366 The wonderful thing about SOAD is that this song like any other good song can have both of those meanings simultaneously. For example, how can one find the motivation to fight the societal disorders caused by global capitalism and neoliberalism without first finding the energy to fight the fear and disorder those systems have impressed on their soul and in their mind.
These reactions are by far the most cathartic, and have been like therapy sessions in the sense of how much I’m learning and healing from them. They’re perfect for me to watch while I wait for my next therapy session.
Before i finished my degree, I was angry at my life, my circumstances, and my job. I used that anger as motivation to finish my degree....and it has done nothing but good for me. People think anger is a negative emotion. But energy derives from both the plus and negative. I found it to be a great motivator.
@@gxbrxxl9626 The skill was changing my perspective. My job changed due to a new company taking over the contract, and what I was doing was....well....boring. Mind numbingly boring. They took away the parts of the job I actually cared about. And I was angry. I started seeing the anger as an energy. Like all energy, all power, you can use it for many different purposes. All it needs is a channel. Once I grasped that, then it becomes a conscious and intentional choice. You can't go back, either you are choosing a downward spiral or an upward path. And if you choose not to choose, that's still a choice. It's inevitable. That put it within MY power. Put all the accountability on MY shoulders. I might've failed to finish the degree. I didn't know, but, looking over my options, the others were too dark to consider. Once you bring that locus of control inward, you become mighty! Most of the naysayers of the world won't have any purchase....you do not contend, and therefore, cannot be contended with.
Anger is based on fears and pain, and pain is absolutely the biggest motivator. Congratulations on the degree!! I am 3 classes away from having my Masters degree for counseling those with substance abuse disorders and all other disorders, which typically most have coexisting disorders to treat. It’s been a loooong road and at 50 years old and working as well has been tough.
I love this positivity,I’m 53 and have just been diagnosed with depression and anxiety (on tablets just to take the edge off) Rock and metal has always been my refuge,in the metal clubs and concerts nobody ever judges and that acceptance has been incredibly important (and even life saving for some.) Thankyou so much for being a voice of understanding and reason 😊
From Micro: Thank you so much for sharing this here. Music can definitely be a powerful outlet and refuge. I wholeheartedly relate to what you describe about concerts - this sense of unity is truly magical! When you're at a concert it doesn't matter who you are - it's all about being genuinely together and sharing a significant moment. Nothing gives me more chills than singing and jumping alongside strangers in the same crowd! On a more personal note, I hope the process of diagnosis and being on medication is going as smoothly as possible for you. I understand firsthand how heavy and draining that process can be. First and foremost of recognizing we need help, then taking action to actually ask for help, then processing official diagnosis, then making decisions and active steps towards being supported... that's huge! Really wanted to commend you for doing all of this because through each step of the way you are standing for yourself and for your well-being. To me personally, accepting to ask for ore professional support was a pivotal and transformative change in my life, but I spent a very long time pushing that possibility away. It felt easier (somehow) to keep going through the same cycles and avoiding the fears that asking for help would generate in me. For some it's easy, for others it's not... so no matter how it was for you: well done ,r eally. You are taking care of yourself and that is genuinely beautiful. I hope also that the medications process is going smoothly, just as it can be particularly challenging at first to be supported that way. Thankfully though there is a life ahead without feeling as much the limitations and barriers that depression has instilled in your life. You asbolutely deserve to embrace life fully, and not just in the grey-ish version that clinical depression tends to paint all the time. Medications have been personally a huge crutch in my life, and at the end of the day I was thankful for allowing me to try and see how it goes. At the end of the day we're all unique and there is not one fit for all... but you are *trying*, you are exploring new pathways, and that is worth everything. May this be the beginning of a new healing path for you, one that will lead you to more confidence and peace within. I believe in you!
Great vid :)....."eating seeds" was used in the 90's as a reference for popping pills. The takeaway i always got from the song was "in between the sacred silence, and sleep....disorder" was a reference to the rise in ADHD diagnosis' and the treatment was to just hand somebody pills.(if you werent asleep, you were in the "sacred silence" aka drugged state. Anything else was disorder) Parents in the 90's didnt want to work with kids deemed "disorderly" because they couldnt focus, so they were given drugs as an overprescribed quick fix.
serj actually confirmed that the sacred silence was eluding to a Native American understanding of spirituality and a place “go to where you can meditate”. so sacred silence was meditation! the sleep refers to actual sleep, REM sleep specifically! he goes into detail in an interview with rainn Wilson (I believe that’s how u spell it?) on a podcast if you’d like to check it out! the legend himself can explain it better than I can haha but you are pretty on point with everything else as far as I’m aware!
actually just watched the interview with Rainn a few days ago a got this explanation straight from the horses mouth :) always loved to glean my own take on a song and then hear how it stacked up with what the intent of the song writer. or in this case the man, the myth, the legend 🍻
@@RogerFlynt966 Came here just to check if anyone was mentioning Serj's explanation. It also brought me back to the final line in "innervision" where he goes "your sacred silence, losing all violence", like... after you meditate anything that could make you mad or aggressive loses it's power over you. And it's a beautiful thought.
I’m a member of a covers band. You have no idea how euphoric four middle aged guys feel shaking off the day job, kids & life commitments raging this tune in a room in the middle of nowhere.. Just as a break from the mundane. Thanks for these reaction vids.
what an awesome take on this song. This song is basically about ADHD and how it feels living with it. Anger is mostly the feeling, but it can't be focused.
This is what is beautiful about great art. She didn’t spend 1 second analyzing lyrics or musicality but rather mood and it lead to a similar but unique understanding of the song. I just think it’s cool that a musician will hear one thing, a lyricist another, a composer another, a therapist another, and so on and so on. Do you ever just feel overwhelming gratitude for being able to comprehend something even at your limited capacity? Maybe too many mushrooms but praise God.
Music man it’s just so fucking awesome. Been listening to this music for 20 years and now finally connecting to this music through learning the drums. Love it so much. Drums, dogs and drugs. The three D’s of life for me. I drum. I take care of and train dogs. And I enjoy cannabis and have enjoyed my few mushroom trips. Rant over of my love for life.
You’ve quickly become one of my new favorite reactors!!! There’s so many SOAD tracks out there for you to sink your teeth into!!! I’d love to hear your take on “Spiders” or “Hynotize”!!! Some of the tracks you’ve reacted to recently (including this one) don’t have any plainly stated emotional commentary, yet you dig through the political/societal commentary and find the emotional red line. And, you take the time to turn that perspective into something actionable. Fuckin awesome. Also, I’d LOVE to see your take on the piano version of “Mien Herz Brennt” by Rammstein!! The lyrics are in German but it’s so worth checking out. The video for it expresses a simple, yet profound representation of childhood trauma. It’s beautiful. Keep up the great work!!! Cheers
its amazing that hearing a couple analysis on songs I loved growing up and realizing that a lot of my problem were muted in my mind due to some of these songs. but hearing you perspective allowed me to further think and internally. search for the answers inside, and how to get them to the surface in order to do some healing.thank you very much for your channel and your time, it truly helps many of us daily.
Killer song, amazing band, glad Serj got back with them, finally. Old school system, mind blowing and ground breaking in all ways. Mid/late 80’s kid here
Love your take on these songs, that were there at my and so many others lowest points. You nailed it with everything you have said. These songs helped so many of us to be able to express our rage, oppression, anger, sorrow, and all the rest we couldn't express and deal with at those points in our lives. These songs helped a lot of us coop until we were finally able to face at least face some of our demons to slowly heal from what we needed to heal from.
One of most impressive things about SOAD is the production and even with all the chaos you can hear every instrument. The way they wrote and produced their songs is genius.
The song is called Toxicity, and it talks about eating seeds is a pastime activity - to me, that's significant - it's not just that life is dreary, but also that our dreary lives are toxic to our environment at large. Our ennui is an immensely destructive force - and it is only when we can conquer that, that we can shine a light for others.
I stumbled upon your video in my YT suggestions. I'm very delighted to have done so. You've managed to dissect such an aggressive and straight-forward piece of music, but in such a delicate and enlightening way. I grew up listening to System since the age of about 10-11 years old; after a classmate gifted me their 'Toxicity' album in a Christmas gift exchange. I was thrilled, and quickly wore that disc out in my CD walk-man. These guys have been a huge part of my life, and still to this day. I appreciate your thoughts on their music / lyrics and i enjoyed your video so much! I'm excited to watch the rest of your stuff, as i see there's a ton of artists i grew up listening to! Cheers :)
I always took disorder as his rebellion against the monotony of order, of going through the motions of life following a prescribed path feeling empty but feeling helpless against the flow of time so he just pursues disorder for the sake of disorder to break apart the order of his life and try to find himself in the pieces.
Hello my ne is Todd Wilson,and I am a person in long term sobriety. This very cool.Im also an assistant director of a sober and re-entry house.I also am an intentional peer support specialist working at the local jail.We are moving into a therapeutic community, (TC) and now after this video,you caught my attention. Luving it !Good job,keep up the good work🙏🏽I appreciate you
0:12 the cutest reaction to that part I've ever seen 0:24 1998 3:58 you are so right 5:00 you are genius End of the video: we need more humans like you
Thanks for your videos I'm getting some free therapy I didn't know I needed I've been a metalhead since 9th grade (84/85) Anthrax Among the living started my journey
My last break up broke my heart and left me with (along with other feelings) a lot of bitterness and anger, but none of it directed towards her. Perhaps it was directed at myself, but either way, I’ve never took control of my life as much now as I have in over a decade. If that’s what it had to take to force me out of this long subconscious acceptance of my meaningless existence, I’m grateful.
Highly suggest checking out "The Virus of Life" by Slipknot; It's one of my favorite songs by them in terms of surface themes, and is quite dark and horror oriented on that front. I'd like to see if you could wring a different interpretation out of it than what's literal in the lyrics. Another great one in this vein, so to speak, is "Iowa", a fifteen minute long song that left my jaw on the floor. It's just as bone chilling, but there might be more of an obvious underlying meaning properly present in that one.
As I grow older, I find myself finding more and more of the hidden meanings in SOAD's songs. From what I have scraped together: these guys knew about the growing issues even in the early 2000's. The (at the time) impending opiate and just overall pill crisis for Toxicity for example. Prison Song, self explanatory. Aerials, a song about finding your personal identity in a society that's all about conformism and being "normal." Deer Dance for police brutality. It's almost prophetic how Toxicity as an album still applies today, if not even more so.
During a performance at the 2005 Download Festival, Daron Malakian said that the song was about Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), a condition that causes a person to have trouble concentrating.
this is true, I've seen it. I find it interesting over the years reading peoples sure interpretations of what the song is about, and most are wrong (maybe not to them, but to what the song was actually about)
My favorite line of the song is "eating seeds is a pass time activity." I've always taken it as 'they' taught us that we should spend our free time consuming more of their products and lies. They being the stereotypical they of corporation and government. Most of their work is to bring light to major issues swept out of our view to keep the 'norm'
To me, the lyric "Somewhere between the sacred silence and sleep" was always about life. Sacred silence is when you are in the womb, and sleep is death.
Me too, I calmed my anger, 1 day I will process it in terms of to sue the mother of my Daughter to refund me back 3years of taking care of her, which was my role as living partner, but I feel that is was used. My Religion does not permit me to have anger, nor to curse someone, but instead to show Compassion, love Forgiveness, and if thy did, done or will continue to do harm in any way to me, just to let thy do more and to Excuse thy Thank you for Your Wise advices.
Im a gamer, so I relate that feeling to basically life feels like a game I have played for a long time, its familiar, but no longer something I want to play. I am forced to because of my family and friends, but some days the quit button is very tempting...
From ThriceTheThird: @pappapandagamer7438 Hello gamer. I'm sorry that you are feeling exhausted and down. If you ever want to share more of what you are going through. Please feel free to do so. We care at HeartSupport and want to see you win the game. <3
From Micro: @pappapandagamer7438 Thank you for sharing this, friend. It's so courageous of you to speak about the battles you lead within but remain unseen to most. Sometimes it's scary to open up about things that makes us feel particularly vulnerable, and it's hard to share it without the fear of freaking out the people we love. What you are going through, the way you feel about your life and perceive it, are so very important to express and hear. Always. The way you describe your own experience feels so very relatable to me personally, and reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend when I was having a wave of suicidal thoughts recently. It came down to expressing that if it wasn't for my partner, sister and close friends, I wouldn't be here anymore. As you said so well, it's hard to be in a place of feeling like you've already seen everything that life could offer somehow, and that there is little hope left to see anything better. It feels more like going through the same circles over and over, completing the same goals almost in a mechanic way. To take your gaming analogy, it surely feels like grinding the same quests over and over and having joy being robbed away from you, as the game itself seems to lose its substance. When you are so tired emotionally it feels likethe wonder and curiosity that life can generate seems to be gone. Under these circustances, it's really difficult to identify the right way to feel whole and alive again. You don't see any positive perspective ahead, so there are times when it's hard to not think about quitting altogether. It makes sense to think about it sometimes, even though you know it's not an healthy and even less fair option... because your life matters so very much, even during times when it's hard to see beyond the pain, the tiredness and the overwhelm. With your friends and family in the picture, I imagine how this must also feel conflicting at times. Personally, I'm thankful for how much the people I love anchor me without them even knowing it. But at the same times there are moments when the heart feels like it just can't take it anymore, and I would almost wish that I had never met my partner or had good friends. Which is such a vicious cycle in the end that makes you see yourself as ungrateful, if not unworthy. Suicidal thoughts can be so easily intertwined with shame, and that's not a recipe that anyone ever deserves to experience. So when you share about how you feel really like you do here, you actively work against the feelings of shame, loneliness and guilt that dark times may bring. You actively seek *hope* even in the midst of feeling like you have not attained it yet. And man that is SO brave, so strong, so powerful of you. For what it's worth from a stranger, I'm so very proud of you. For being here, for being you, for making it through the days when you felt you should press the quit button. For choosing instead to pause when it feels like life is crushing you down. There's a lot of patience required during those times, and I'm so thankful you've been giving yourself *time*, you've been your heart some grace and just the benefit of the doubt that as long as you keep trying, there *is* hope to discover new pathways. Maybe with your loved ones directly supporting you and knowing what you're going through. Maybe with the help of a professional who would offer a safe space and strategize next steps with you. Maybe on your own with tons of love towards yourself and patience during enduring times. No matter how, there are roads ahead waiting to be known, and I wholeheartedly believe in your ability to seek them as well as to walk on them. You matter, friend. I see you and I hear you. Hold fast. :heart:
Thank you :) I appreciate you reaching out to me. I do have a great support system and am very open and honest with my doctor about my depression. I have been looking for a therapist I just need to find one that I can afford and who I can trust. I am currently on medication and fighting the good fight. @@HeartSupport
From Micro: @pappapandagamer7438 This is great to hear! Well done for all the steps you've been taking. They're certainly not the easiest, but absolutely worth it. You got this, friend. :heart:
I used to use this album to help me get through tedious tasks. The lead singer actually remade the whole album with the New Zealand symphony orchestra to encourage young people to listen to more classical music. In my opinion it's better than the original version. System of a down are true musicians.
You should check out whitechapels newest 2 albums, they are heavy but combine some beautiful clean singing with harsh vocals to tell a very emotional tale about the trauma from his childhood
Always enjoy your interpretations. You should check out “Empty walls” from the lead of S.O.A.D Serj. I would love to hear that interpretation. Thanks for all these!!!
Impressive review! Maybe reading too much into it, but I've always thought the disorder is something to be able to disrupt the dreary, repetitive monotony. Maybe even implying "order" is maintained by interests that just want to keep us all hooked up to the Matrix, and disorder is what can disrupt that.
Eating seeds as a best-time activity… In Armenia, it’s incredibly common to eat sunflower seeds. It’s almost like smoking or any other habit. Back in the day, young people did it all the time, just standing on the streets or at crossroads, eating seeds nonstop. It was a way to pass the time when there wasn’t much else to do. I think they meant there’s nothing else to do but eat seeds.
@HeartSupport, this song encapsulates how I have been feeling for the past 4-5 years. I'm 45, never married, no partner, no kids. I feel I have lost at living and to be honest, I'm not sure if I have the inner strength or energy or if I can even be bothered to get myself out of this situation. Every time I have tried to get myself to of the situation, every time I try to lift myself up, someone comes along and rips my feet out from under me.
From sravyasridhar: @ScotsmanDougal Hi friend, I want to start off by reminding you that there is no real way to "win" or "lose" in life; it is all very relative and unique to each person. Just because you do not have kids or a partner does not make you any less of a person than someone who has those things. I also want to say I am so proud of you for always trying to lift yourself up. That is all that matters. Keep trying, I believe in you. Make sure not to fall prey to all the pressures of society. You're doing amazing. - Star :)
From Jearls: @ScotsmanDougal Hi friend. I understand the feeling of hopelessness and despair can be strong at times. It's important to remember that there is no one path to success. There is no timer, no scoreboard no rulebook and no referee. I am confident that you will find the strength to try new things and find the beauty in life. There are people twice your age that look back at age 45 and wish they could've started then. The best time to start is today. Sending love. -SM
From twixremix: @ScotsmanDougal hey friend, that’s so cool that you found a deep connection in the music shared in this video. you are not alone in feeling these societal and personal pressures. something i’ve taken comfort in is that there is no blueprint or checkboxes to identify if someone won or loss at life. it’s understandable how you can feel exhausted by it all when things keep coming along and knocking you down. if these adjustments to your life will bring you happiness and ignite a new spark for life, i believe in you fully. even if you start slow to get to your goals, i know you’ve got this. and no matter the age, i can say with 100% certainty that you are not the only one in this world experiencing same thoughts, fears, and doubts! you deserve to love and be loved, never forget that. love, twix
From Malig3: @ScotsmanDougal Hey! Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable with us. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling stuck. I think there is an unrealistic time pressure to know what you want in life at such a young age. I want to remind you to be kind to yourself and know that what is meant for you is heading your way on YOUR timeline. There is no deadline or rush on life. You matter, and you can do anything you put your mind to. Good things tend to come our way when we are not looking and putting all of our energy into ourselves. Show yourself some love! I think finding a new hobby, exploring a new area, meeting new people, and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone are great places to start. There is not better time than right now. You've. got this. We believe in you, and we are here to support you. <3
While watching your analysis I realized this song makes me think of 9/11. Upon further research I found that it came out in September of 2001, so in the exact same month as the attack. I remember feeling really angry and confused during that time. In addition to typical teen angst, we were all living in fear and uncertainty (worried there would be more terrorist attacks and a military draft). It was also only a few years after Columbine so there was always this underlying fear of school shootings. The line “How do you own the world, how do you own disorder?” really resonated at that time. SOAD was a staple on my playlists along with Disturbed, Linkin Park, and Rage Against the Machine. In hindsight it makes a lot of sense.
I absorb the lyrics as being about general toxicity in any form be it small or large. And I think when he says "The toxicity of our city" he means that literally. An entire city run by toxic people who think the world revolves around them, who pass their toxicity onto those who suffer while seeing the world through a narrow perspective (the tire hub reference). And the only escape for the victims of their disorder is passing time eating seeds (cheap food in volume), sleeping... waiting for inevitable sacred silence in death.
Imo the "eating seeds" lyric is refering to baseball, "a pasttime activity", refering to many who have an unhealthy or toxic relationship with sports. I agree with everything you said.
You should check out the band Sylosis and a song from their latest album, (A Sign of Things To Come), called Absent. I think they did an immaculate job of encapsulating what most humans these days are feeling but also making the song hit you like he's either singing about you or to you. As a fellow therapist and, (as of today), first time viewer...I really think it will move you in ways you probably haven't been moved in.
I used my anger to get passed my higher education because i hated my family and didn't want to be anything like them. I thought anger with a cold calculated mind makes someone unstoppable.....only deletion can stop someone like that and he wont go down easily.....I would always hear "love can move mountain's " ...I would always respond "But anger obliterates that mountain and will make it to where it can never be a obstacle again .... even if its one stone at a time with the right anger and mind that mountain will be gone". BUT! I have also learned recently that the anger is poison that some that are close to you will be affected by too.... I found myself hurting the ones I actually cared about. " Resentment, anger, and hatred are poisons that you drink and you expect someone else to die." ~Sadhguru~
Eating seed is a past time activity We implant thoughts in are mind that grow and if we plant toxic seeds that can grow so consume / eat different seeds
I started to know how to really listen to muzik when this album was released I think I was 11 yo. It unlocked my true self. It's cool that you get the real hidden message on a first hearing 😮
PLEASE DO HI REN-REN!!!! Love your reactions & think you will more than appreciate the masterpiece. He brought music as we know it to another level. ❤️
I getting divorced to my borderline psychotic ex and try to get my life back with my new girlfriend and daughter. System of a down is a music where i cry inside because i cant let it out. I was diagnosed with great depressions and suicidal thoughts. I got help before but now its only my child and girlfriend that helps me with my psyche.
From DyllonKG: @michaelpirner1704 Hey there friend. Thanks so much for commenting here and allowing us to be a part of this with you, even if just for a moment. It sounds like you've gone through a lot between a difficult past relationship and your diagnosis as having depression and suicidal thoughts. You mentioned how you previously had help but now you rely on your girlfriend and child to get by. That sounds like a really difficult spot to be in. If you dont mind me asking, what has your depression been like for you? How has that effected you? Regardless, I am so sorry that you're struggling right now. I imagine life feels a bit messy right now and that old wounds can still feel a bit raw from time to time. You're persevering one step at a time and Im proud of you for that. You mentioned that at one point you had help but that you dont get help, professionally, any more. Why is that? I only ask because there was a point in my life where I didnt get help. I relied on people around me and my daughter to help get me by. But that only carried me, personally, so far. Because they were lights in my life. They were the reason I lived and breath. But that also meant that I was putting a lot of pressure on them. I almost needed them to need me, otherwise life began to have little meaning. Of course, that was several several years ago. Ive since done a lot of work on myself and to be quite honest - i still need a lot of therapy and need to continue doing the work. But I believe the way I can show up best for my daughter is to show her that it's ok to ask for help. Its ok to go to therapy. Its normal in the same way that a flu shot is normal. I dont want this to feel prescriptive though. You know your needs and the needs of your family best. And ultimately, i want you to feel and be ok. And for your family to be ok. Thanks so much for posting and for hearing me out. If you ever want to update us on your future, on your progress, feel free to post more on HeartSupport. We're here to shoulder some of that burden with you, alongside you. You're kind. You're capable. Hold fast, friend.
It's a weird situation to be in, to try to use this kind of perspective to understand SoaD, because they were political messengers, not psychological. This song, from my understanding is about Los Angeles, if I recall. The homelessness problem, the drug problems of the time in general. But the other issue with meaning in SoaD songs is that chunks of it are extremely straightforward and clear, some of it is coded, metaphorical, ect... but also there is plenty of complete nonsense that essentially means nothing, because there wasn't any deep thought behind it, it just sounded good. And pulling it all apart of figuring out what is what is tough. But the main thing to remember is that it is almost always political over anything else.
I love these reactions, if you are looking for inspirational lyrics look to some Killswitch Engage "I am broken too" very much inspried by mental healh/substance abuse and Hatebreed who sound aggressive but their lyrics are just so positive and inspirational. "This is now" is a great intro song.
My interpretation of the sacred silence and sleep is life. The silence being before birth and sleep being death. In betwwen those two. In between birth and death is life. Thats where we are. Somewhere in between life and death. 👍🏽 How you see it is interesting as well. The livimg moments between sleeping waiting for death. Everyday we wake up betweeen the two until we fall asleep again.
He used his anger to become the sun and shine on others... That's such an amazing thought.
She kinda has it flipped though. It’s not a song about futility it’s a song about challenging the establishment in saying humanity owns disorder. We can use our anger to create disorder to stop the status quo. It’s a rallying song for offense in the face of fascism.
@@brentsalem3366 I thought so too at first, and at first it seems we were right, but she seemed to get it by the end.
Don't you think?
@@brentsalem3366 The wonderful thing about SOAD is that this song like any other good song can have both of those meanings simultaneously. For example, how can one find the motivation to fight the societal disorders caused by global capitalism and neoliberalism without first finding the energy to fight the fear and disorder those systems have impressed on their soul and in their mind.
These reactions are by far the most cathartic, and have been like therapy sessions in the sense of how much I’m learning and healing from them. They’re perfect for me to watch while I wait for my next therapy session.
Before i finished my degree, I was angry at my life, my circumstances, and my job. I used that anger as motivation to finish my degree....and it has done nothing but good for me. People think anger is a negative emotion. But energy derives from both the plus and negative. I found it to be a great motivator.
Energy is never made nor destroyed. You can not have good without bad.
Interesting reflection!!🤔
Hope one day I can acquire the skill of turning negative energy into fuel, right now it just cripples me.
@@gxbrxxl9626 The skill was changing my perspective. My job changed due to a new company taking over the contract, and what I was doing was....well....boring. Mind numbingly boring. They took away the parts of the job I actually cared about. And I was angry. I started seeing the anger as an energy. Like all energy, all power, you can use it for many different purposes. All it needs is a channel. Once I grasped that, then it becomes a conscious and intentional choice. You can't go back, either you are choosing a downward spiral or an upward path. And if you choose not to choose, that's still a choice. It's inevitable. That put it within MY power. Put all the accountability on MY shoulders. I might've failed to finish the degree. I didn't know, but, looking over my options, the others were too dark to consider. Once you bring that locus of control inward, you become mighty! Most of the naysayers of the world won't have any purchase....you do not contend, and therefore, cannot be contended with.
Anger is based on fears and pain, and pain is absolutely the biggest motivator. Congratulations on the degree!! I am 3 classes away from having my Masters degree for counseling those with substance abuse disorders and all other disorders, which typically most have coexisting disorders to treat. It’s been a loooong road and at 50 years old and working as well has been tough.
I love this positivity,I’m 53 and have just been diagnosed with depression and anxiety (on tablets just to take the edge off)
Rock and metal has always been my refuge,in the metal clubs and concerts nobody ever judges and that acceptance has been incredibly important (and even life saving for some.)
Thankyou so much for being a voice of understanding and reason 😊
This 🤘
From Micro: Thank you so much for sharing this here. Music can definitely be a powerful outlet and refuge. I wholeheartedly relate to what you describe about concerts - this sense of unity is truly magical! When you're at a concert it doesn't matter who you are - it's all about being genuinely together and sharing a significant moment. Nothing gives me more chills than singing and jumping alongside strangers in the same crowd!
On a more personal note, I hope the process of diagnosis and being on medication is going as smoothly as possible for you. I understand firsthand how heavy and draining that process can be. First and foremost of recognizing we need help, then taking action to actually ask for help, then processing official diagnosis, then making decisions and active steps towards being supported... that's huge! Really wanted to commend you for doing all of this because through each step of the way you are standing for yourself and for your well-being.
To me personally, accepting to ask for ore professional support was a pivotal and transformative change in my life, but I spent a very long time pushing that possibility away. It felt easier (somehow) to keep going through the same cycles and avoiding the fears that asking for help would generate in me. For some it's easy, for others it's not... so no matter how it was for you: well done ,r eally. You are taking care of yourself and that is genuinely beautiful.
I hope also that the medications process is going smoothly, just as it can be particularly challenging at first to be supported that way. Thankfully though there is a life ahead without feeling as much the limitations and barriers that depression has instilled in your life. You asbolutely deserve to embrace life fully, and not just in the grey-ish version that clinical depression tends to paint all the time. Medications have been personally a huge crutch in my life, and at the end of the day I was thankful for allowing me to try and see how it goes. At the end of the day we're all unique and there is not one fit for all... but you are *trying*, you are exploring new pathways, and that is worth everything.
May this be the beginning of a new healing path for you, one that will lead you to more confidence and peace within. I believe in you!
What a thoughtful response to a viewers comment, you're a real one!@@HeartSupport
Just remember, you have the support of a all the metalheads around the world, stay strong, dont give up!!, cheers from Argentina brother!!
I love when the sounds match the feeling in the lyrics and your scrunchy face tells me you get it. Love it!
Great vid :)....."eating seeds" was used in the 90's as a reference for popping pills. The takeaway i always got from the song was "in between the sacred silence, and sleep....disorder" was a reference to the rise in ADHD diagnosis' and the treatment was to just hand somebody pills.(if you werent asleep, you were in the "sacred silence" aka drugged state. Anything else was disorder) Parents in the 90's didnt want to work with kids deemed "disorderly" because they couldnt focus, so they were given drugs as an overprescribed quick fix.
Thank you
Eating seeds is/could also be a reference to Armenian culture
serj actually confirmed that the sacred silence was eluding to a Native American understanding of spirituality and a place “go to where you can meditate”. so sacred silence was meditation! the sleep refers to actual sleep, REM sleep specifically! he goes into detail in an interview with rainn Wilson (I believe that’s how u spell it?) on a podcast if you’d like to check it out! the legend himself can explain it better than I can haha but you are pretty on point with everything else as far as I’m aware!
actually just watched the interview with Rainn a few days ago a got this explanation straight from the horses mouth :) always loved to glean my own take on a song and then hear how it stacked up with what the intent of the song writer. or in this case the man, the myth, the legend 🍻
@@RogerFlynt966 Came here just to check if anyone was mentioning Serj's explanation. It also brought me back to the final line in "innervision" where he goes "your sacred silence, losing all violence", like... after you meditate anything that could make you mad or aggressive loses it's power over you. And it's a beautiful thought.
"hey SoaD, how many time signatures are you gonna use in this one?"
SoaD: "Yes."
actually it can be count all in 6 ;p
Soad and Tool tend to do that x)
There Is another banda that do that, but Is spanish
This is a straight 6/8 the whole time, just with some funky divisions
Everything is 4/4 if you don't try to sound like an Uber educated nerd lol
I love how therapists like metal, like my therapist like metal too
I need to see if mine does. Her husband is a composer so it would be interesting if she did
the good ones have all been in the same place we are, so it makes sense.
It's one of the best genres to get anger out :)
I’m a member of a covers band. You have no idea how euphoric four middle aged guys feel shaking off the day job, kids & life commitments raging this tune in a room in the middle of nowhere.. Just as a break from the mundane. Thanks for these reaction vids.
Same but my band plays all original stuff, I love writing songs just as much as playing them to people and getting awesome responses from people!
Agreed
what an awesome take on this song.
This song is basically about ADHD and how it feels living with it. Anger is mostly the feeling, but it can't be focused.
I remember when this song came out when I was in school. The drums have always been the best part of this song. Good times.
This is what is beautiful about great art. She didn’t spend 1 second analyzing lyrics or musicality but rather mood and it lead to a similar but unique understanding of the song. I just think it’s cool that a musician will hear one thing, a lyricist another, a composer another, a therapist another, and so on and so on. Do you ever just feel overwhelming gratitude for being able to comprehend something even at your limited capacity? Maybe too many mushrooms but praise God.
Music man it’s just so fucking awesome. Been listening to this music for 20 years and now finally connecting to this music through learning the drums. Love it so much.
Drums, dogs and drugs. The three D’s of life for me. I drum. I take care of and train dogs. And I enjoy cannabis and have enjoyed my few mushroom trips.
Rant over of my love for life.
You’ve quickly become one of my new favorite reactors!!!
There’s so many SOAD tracks out there for you to sink your teeth into!!! I’d love to hear your take on “Spiders” or “Hynotize”!!!
Some of the tracks you’ve reacted to recently (including this one) don’t have any plainly stated emotional commentary, yet you dig through the political/societal commentary and find the emotional red line. And, you take the time to turn that perspective into something actionable. Fuckin awesome.
Also, I’d LOVE to see your take on the piano version of “Mien Herz Brennt” by Rammstein!! The lyrics are in German but it’s so worth checking out. The video for it expresses a simple, yet profound representation of childhood trauma. It’s beautiful. Keep up the great work!!!
Cheers
its amazing that hearing a couple analysis on songs I loved growing up and realizing that a lot of my problem were muted in my mind due to some of these songs. but hearing you perspective allowed me to further think and internally. search for the answers inside, and how to get them to the surface in order to do some healing.thank you very much for your channel and your time, it truly helps many of us daily.
Killer song, amazing band, glad Serj got back with them, finally. Old school system, mind blowing and ground breaking in all ways. Mid/late
80’s kid here
Trump came between them politically...sad
Love your take on these songs, that were there at my and so many others lowest points. You nailed it with everything you have said.
These songs helped so many of us to be able to express our rage, oppression, anger, sorrow, and all the rest we couldn't express and deal with at those points in our lives.
These songs helped a lot of us coop until we were finally able to face at least face some of our demons to slowly heal from what we needed to heal from.
One of most impressive things about SOAD is the production and even with all the chaos you can hear every instrument. The way they wrote and produced their songs is genius.
The song is called Toxicity, and it talks about eating seeds is a pastime activity - to me, that's significant - it's not just that life is dreary, but also that our dreary lives are toxic to our environment at large. Our ennui is an immensely destructive force - and it is only when we can conquer that, that we can shine a light for others.
😊😊
I stumbled upon your video in my YT suggestions. I'm very delighted to have done so. You've managed to dissect such an aggressive and straight-forward piece of music, but in such a delicate and enlightening way.
I grew up listening to System since the age of about 10-11 years old; after a classmate gifted me their 'Toxicity' album in a Christmas gift exchange. I was thrilled, and quickly wore that disc out in my CD walk-man. These guys have been a huge part of my life, and still to this day. I appreciate your thoughts on their music / lyrics and i enjoyed your video so much!
I'm excited to watch the rest of your stuff, as i see there's a ton of artists i grew up listening to!
Cheers :)
I'm from Algeria and I used to listen to soad in the UK early 2000 when I was in the university, best brand
Your analysis of the songs are just so good
System has a LOT of anger against the "system" and Daaaang!,they play that ....looove it....😊
I just found this channel, loved it, and loved the music approach you make
"...I don't know, we'll see!" - you say that often, makes me laugh. I've been enjoying your videos lately. Thank you.
That drop is fucking beautiful. Pure headbanging moment that gives chills down my spine.
"when I became the sun, I shone life into a man's heart"
changed my life tbh
She's always reacting to my favorite songs, I loved her outlook on Daddy
Her analysis brought tears to my eyes.
Girl I am loving your visage and your real take on these lyrics.
I always took disorder as his rebellion against the monotony of order, of going through the motions of life following a prescribed path feeling empty but feeling helpless against the flow of time so he just pursues disorder for the sake of disorder to break apart the order of his life and try to find himself in the pieces.
Here we go! Beautiful song to wake up to. 🙏
I'm loving these breakdown videos and I'm loving the comment sections.
SOAD always tread this line between chaos and construction, it feels like a rage that is directed at something good? Such an amazing band.
Hello my ne is Todd Wilson,and I am a person in long term sobriety. This very cool.Im also an assistant director of a sober and re-entry house.I also am an intentional peer support specialist working at the local jail.We are moving into a therapeutic community, (TC) and now after this video,you caught my attention. Luving it !Good job,keep up the good work🙏🏽I appreciate you
0:12 the cutest reaction to that part I've ever seen
0:24 1998
3:58 you are so right
5:00 you are genius
End of the video: we need more humans like you
I love the no intro in your videos it feels so honest.
Love the way you get into the heavy parts by headbanging.
Thanks for your videos I'm getting some free therapy I didn't know I needed I've been a metalhead since 9th grade (84/85) Anthrax Among the living started my journey
The way you describe things is beautiful, love the reaction 👌
i love the way u naturally get them
My last break up broke my heart and left me with (along with other feelings) a lot of bitterness and anger, but none of it directed towards her. Perhaps it was directed at myself, but either way, I’ve never took control of my life as much now as I have in over a decade. If that’s what it had to take to force me out of this long subconscious acceptance of my meaningless existence, I’m grateful.
“Hi REN” is right up your alley. Even if you don’t react to it, give it a chance It’s worth the time
Highly suggest checking out "The Virus of Life" by Slipknot; It's one of my favorite songs by them in terms of surface themes, and is quite dark and horror oriented on that front. I'd like to see if you could wring a different interpretation out of it than what's literal in the lyrics.
Another great one in this vein, so to speak, is "Iowa", a fifteen minute long song that left my jaw on the floor. It's just as bone chilling, but there might be more of an obvious underlying meaning properly present in that one.
Miss, you get the SOAD art. I'm loving watching your reacts.
As I grow older, I find myself finding more and more of the hidden meanings in SOAD's songs.
From what I have scraped together: these guys knew about the growing issues even in the early 2000's. The (at the time) impending opiate and just overall pill crisis for Toxicity for example. Prison Song, self explanatory. Aerials, a song about finding your personal identity in a society that's all about conformism and being "normal." Deer Dance for police brutality. It's almost prophetic how Toxicity as an album still applies today, if not even more so.
I'm new to your channel. That's a great take on the song. I will follow.
During a performance at the 2005 Download Festival, Daron Malakian said that the song was about Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), a condition that causes a person to have trouble concentrating.
this is true, I've seen it. I find it interesting over the years reading peoples sure interpretations of what the song is about, and most are wrong (maybe not to them, but to what the song was actually about)
He is a Talented Singer .... with great musicians backing him up
I use Ska music when I'm feeling down on whatever
this is my favourite song from S.O.A.D so under rated
ummm underrated by who?
New favourite channel
My favorite line of the song is "eating seeds is a pass time activity." I've always taken it as 'they' taught us that we should spend our free time consuming more of their products and lies. They being the stereotypical they of corporation and government. Most of their work is to bring light to major issues swept out of our view to keep the 'norm'
To me, the lyric "Somewhere between the sacred silence and sleep" was always about life. Sacred silence is when you are in the womb, and sleep is death.
Me too, I calmed my anger, 1 day I will process it in terms of to sue the mother of my Daughter to refund me back 3years of taking care of her, which was my role as living partner, but I feel that is was used.
My Religion does not permit me to have anger, nor to curse someone, but instead to show Compassion, love Forgiveness, and if thy did, done or will continue to do harm in any way to me, just to let thy do more and to Excuse thy
Thank you for Your Wise advices.
Gran reaccion me gusta que comparta su perspectiva del significado de la cancion
Im a gamer, so I relate that feeling to basically life feels like a game I have played for a long time, its familiar, but no longer something I want to play. I am forced to because of my family and friends, but some days the quit button is very tempting...
From ThriceTheThird: @pappapandagamer7438 Hello gamer. I'm sorry that you are feeling exhausted and down. If you ever want to share more of what you are going through. Please feel free to do so. We care at HeartSupport and want to see you win the game. <3
From Micro: @pappapandagamer7438 Thank you for sharing this, friend. It's so courageous of you to speak about the battles you lead within but remain unseen to most. Sometimes it's scary to open up about things that makes us feel particularly vulnerable, and it's hard to share it without the fear of freaking out the people we love. What you are going through, the way you feel about your life and perceive it, are so very important to express and hear. Always.
The way you describe your own experience feels so very relatable to me personally, and reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend when I was having a wave of suicidal thoughts recently. It came down to expressing that if it wasn't for my partner, sister and close friends, I wouldn't be here anymore. As you said so well, it's hard to be in a place of feeling like you've already seen everything that life could offer somehow, and that there is little hope left to see anything better. It feels more like going through the same circles over and over, completing the same goals almost in a mechanic way. To take your gaming analogy, it surely feels like grinding the same quests over and over and having joy being robbed away from you, as the game itself seems to lose its substance. When you are so tired emotionally it feels likethe wonder and curiosity that life can generate seems to be gone. Under these circustances, it's really difficult to identify the right way to feel whole and alive again. You don't see any positive perspective ahead, so there are times when it's hard to not think about quitting altogether. It makes sense to think about it sometimes, even though you know it's not an healthy and even less fair option... because your life matters so very much, even during times when it's hard to see beyond the pain, the tiredness and the overwhelm.
With your friends and family in the picture, I imagine how this must also feel conflicting at times. Personally, I'm thankful for how much the people I love anchor me without them even knowing it. But at the same times there are moments when the heart feels like it just can't take it anymore, and I would almost wish that I had never met my partner or had good friends. Which is such a vicious cycle in the end that makes you see yourself as ungrateful, if not unworthy. Suicidal thoughts can be so easily intertwined with shame, and that's not a recipe that anyone ever deserves to experience. So when you share about how you feel really like you do here, you actively work against the feelings of shame, loneliness and guilt that dark times may bring. You actively seek *hope* even in the midst of feeling like you have not attained it yet. And man that is SO brave, so strong, so powerful of you.
For what it's worth from a stranger, I'm so very proud of you. For being here, for being you, for making it through the days when you felt you should press the quit button. For choosing instead to pause when it feels like life is crushing you down. There's a lot of patience required during those times, and I'm so thankful you've been giving yourself *time*, you've been your heart some grace and just the benefit of the doubt that as long as you keep trying, there *is* hope to discover new pathways. Maybe with your loved ones directly supporting you and knowing what you're going through. Maybe with the help of a professional who would offer a safe space and strategize next steps with you. Maybe on your own with tons of love towards yourself and patience during enduring times. No matter how, there are roads ahead waiting to be known, and I wholeheartedly believe in your ability to seek them as well as to walk on them.
You matter, friend. I see you and I hear you. Hold fast. :heart:
Thank you :) I appreciate you reaching out to me. I do have a great support system and am very open and honest with my doctor about my depression. I have been looking for a therapist I just need to find one that I can afford and who I can trust. I am currently on medication and fighting the good fight. @@HeartSupport
From Micro: @pappapandagamer7438 This is great to hear! Well done for all the steps you've been taking. They're certainly not the easiest, but absolutely worth it. You got this, friend. :heart:
Brilliant reaction and analysis…I feel this 😎🤘🔥
I used to use this album to help me get through tedious tasks. The lead singer actually remade the whole album with the New Zealand symphony orchestra to encourage young people to listen to more classical music. In my opinion it's better than the original version. System of a down are true musicians.
Please you have to listen to "Sugar" by this guys, I simply LOVE IT
Keep going, We gonna get you to 100k soon 🤘😉
Need more of SOAD top song reactions from you 💛
5:44 was Black Tongue?? Dare I say I'm impressed, quite the sludgey band
I love this young lady, she's good shut.
I love you’re internpation.
You should check out whitechapels newest 2 albums, they are heavy but combine some beautiful clean singing with harsh vocals to tell a very emotional tale about the trauma from his childhood
Always enjoy your interpretations. You should check out “Empty walls” from the lead of S.O.A.D Serj. I would love to hear that interpretation. Thanks for all these!!!
Impressive review! Maybe reading too much into it, but I've always thought the disorder is something to be able to disrupt the dreary, repetitive monotony. Maybe even implying "order" is maintained by interests that just want to keep us all hooked up to the Matrix, and disorder is what can disrupt that.
Agree. As if the government and bigpharma want to control all emotions . To angry? Pills. Sad ? Pills. Not enough alleniated? Pills
Eating seeds as a best-time activity… In Armenia, it’s incredibly common to eat sunflower seeds. It’s almost like smoking or any other habit. Back in the day, young people did it all the time, just standing on the streets or at crossroads, eating seeds nonstop. It was a way to pass the time when there wasn’t much else to do.
I think they meant there’s nothing else to do but eat seeds.
Love your analysis.
SOAD is definitly one of my top 10 favorite bands. And I am a punker.
@HeartSupport, this song encapsulates how I have been feeling for the past 4-5 years. I'm 45, never married, no partner, no kids. I feel I have lost at living and to be honest, I'm not sure if I have the inner strength or energy or if I can even be bothered to get myself out of this situation. Every time I have tried to get myself to of the situation, every time I try to lift myself up, someone comes along and rips my feet out from under me.
From sravyasridhar: @ScotsmanDougal Hi friend,
I want to start off by reminding you that there is no real way to "win" or "lose" in life; it is all very relative and unique to each person. Just because you do not have kids or a partner does not make you any less of a person than someone who has those things. I also want to say I am so proud of you for always trying to lift yourself up. That is all that matters. Keep trying, I believe in you. Make sure not to fall prey to all the pressures of society. You're doing amazing.
- Star :)
From Jearls: @ScotsmanDougal Hi friend. I understand the feeling of hopelessness and despair can be strong at times. It's important to remember that there is no one path to success. There is no timer, no scoreboard no rulebook and no referee. I am confident that you will find the strength to try new things and find the beauty in life. There are people twice your age that look back at age 45 and wish they could've started then. The best time to start is today. Sending love.
-SM
From twixremix: @ScotsmanDougal hey friend, that’s so cool that you found a deep connection in the music shared in this video. you are not alone in feeling these societal and personal pressures. something i’ve taken comfort in is that there is no blueprint or checkboxes to identify if someone won or loss at life. it’s understandable how you can feel exhausted by it all when things keep coming along and knocking you down. if these adjustments to your life will bring you happiness and ignite a new spark for life, i believe in you fully. even if you start slow to get to your goals, i know you’ve got this. and no matter the age, i can say with 100% certainty that you are not the only one in this world experiencing same thoughts, fears, and doubts! you deserve to love and be loved, never forget that.
love,
twix
From Malig3: @ScotsmanDougal Hey!
Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable with us. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling stuck. I think there is an unrealistic time pressure to know what you want in life at such a young age. I want to remind you to be kind to yourself and know that what is meant for you is heading your way on YOUR timeline. There is no deadline or rush on life. You matter, and you can do anything you put your mind to. Good things tend to come our way when we are not looking and putting all of our energy into ourselves. Show yourself some love! I think finding a new hobby, exploring a new area, meeting new people, and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone are great places to start. There is not better time than right now. You've. got this. We believe in you, and we are here to support you. <3
Thanks so much guys, it means a lot. Just take each day as it comes.
Thanks again ML&R
If you are digging SOAD, you have to check out "Lonely Day", I would love to see your interpretation of it all, it's beautifully depressing
While watching your analysis I realized this song makes me think of 9/11. Upon further research I found that it came out in September of 2001, so in the exact same month as the attack. I remember feeling really angry and confused during that time. In addition to typical teen angst, we were all living in fear and uncertainty (worried there would be more terrorist attacks and a military draft). It was also only a few years after Columbine so there was always this underlying fear of school shootings. The line “How do you own the world, how do you own disorder?” really resonated at that time. SOAD was a staple on my playlists along with Disturbed, Linkin Park, and Rage Against the Machine. In hindsight it makes a lot of sense.
I absorb the lyrics as being about general toxicity in any form be it small or large. And I think when he says "The toxicity of our city" he means that literally. An entire city run by toxic people who think the world revolves around them, who pass their toxicity onto those who suffer while seeing the world through a narrow perspective (the tire hub reference). And the only escape for the victims of their disorder is passing time eating seeds (cheap food in volume), sleeping... waiting for inevitable sacred silence in death.
Imo the "eating seeds" lyric is refering to baseball, "a pasttime activity", refering to many who have an unhealthy or toxic relationship with sports. I agree with everything you said.
You should check out the band Sylosis and a song from their latest album, (A Sign of Things To Come), called Absent. I think they did an immaculate job of encapsulating what most humans these days are feeling but also making the song hit you like he's either singing about you or to you.
As a fellow therapist and, (as of today), first time viewer...I really think it will move you in ways you probably haven't been moved in.
I love the drums in this song.
I used my anger to get passed my higher education because i hated my family and didn't want to be anything like them. I thought anger with a cold calculated mind makes someone unstoppable.....only deletion can stop someone like that and he wont go down easily.....I would always hear "love can move mountain's " ...I would always respond "But anger obliterates that mountain and will make it to where it can never be a obstacle again .... even if its one stone at a time with the right anger and mind that mountain will be gone". BUT! I have also learned recently that the anger is poison that some that are close to you will be affected by too.... I found myself hurting the ones I actually cared about.
" Resentment, anger, and hatred are poisons that you drink and you expect someone else to die."
~Sadhguru~
Eating seed is a past time activity
We implant thoughts in are mind that grow and if we plant toxic seeds that can grow so consume / eat different seeds
Plant positive seeds look at the growth of the good things you plant and stop watering the plants that steal you sunlight
I started to know how to really listen to muzik when this album was released I think I was 11 yo. It unlocked my true self.
It's cool that you get the real hidden message on a first hearing 😮
me encanta como todo lo procesas positivamente
Serj is a Gift!
Serj said in an interview that the sacred silence refers to meditation
I think it was Shavo who said it's about attention deficit disorder. He also directed the video.
Great reaction thanks 🎉🎉🎉🎉
You got a sub just for your metal angry scowl face. 🤘😂💯
You really, REALLY have to check out Arch Enemy, Reason to Believe! Amazing song for mental health!
Legendary song
PLEASE DO HI REN-REN!!!! Love your reactions & think you will more than appreciate the masterpiece. He brought music as we know it to another level. ❤️
Best interpretation of this song I have seen so far.
I getting divorced to my borderline psychotic ex and try to get my life back with my new girlfriend and daughter. System of a down is a music where i cry inside because i cant let it out. I was diagnosed with great depressions and suicidal thoughts. I got help before but now its only my child and girlfriend that helps me with my psyche.
From DyllonKG: @michaelpirner1704 Hey there friend.
Thanks so much for commenting here and allowing us to be a part of this with you, even if just for a moment.
It sounds like you've gone through a lot between a difficult past relationship and your diagnosis as having depression and suicidal thoughts. You mentioned how you previously had help but now you rely on your girlfriend and child to get by.
That sounds like a really difficult spot to be in. If you dont mind me asking, what has your depression been like for you? How has that effected you?
Regardless, I am so sorry that you're struggling right now. I imagine life feels a bit messy right now and that old wounds can still feel a bit raw from time to time.
You're persevering one step at a time and Im proud of you for that.
You mentioned that at one point you had help but that you dont get help, professionally, any more. Why is that?
I only ask because there was a point in my life where I didnt get help. I relied on people around me and my daughter to help get me by. But that only carried me, personally, so far. Because they were lights in my life. They were the reason I lived and breath. But that also meant that I was putting a lot of pressure on them. I almost needed them to need me, otherwise life began to have little meaning.
Of course, that was several several years ago. Ive since done a lot of work on myself and to be quite honest - i still need a lot of therapy and need to continue doing the work. But I believe the way I can show up best for my daughter is to show her that it's ok to ask for help. Its ok to go to therapy. Its normal in the same way that a flu shot is normal.
I dont want this to feel prescriptive though. You know your needs and the needs of your family best. And ultimately, i want you to feel and be ok. And for your family to be ok.
Thanks so much for posting and for hearing me out. If you ever want to update us on your future, on your progress, feel free to post more on HeartSupport. We're here to shoulder some of that burden with you, alongside you.
You're kind. You're capable. Hold fast, friend.
Nobody sitting on the wall betting on disorder, just desire.
Awesome take! Also you’re a pretty gal. Such a great song!!
Thanks for doing these, and rock on!
/
/
It's a weird situation to be in, to try to use this kind of perspective to understand SoaD, because they were political messengers, not psychological. This song, from my understanding is about Los Angeles, if I recall. The homelessness problem, the drug problems of the time in general. But the other issue with meaning in SoaD songs is that chunks of it are extremely straightforward and clear, some of it is coded, metaphorical, ect... but also there is plenty of complete nonsense that essentially means nothing, because there wasn't any deep thought behind it, it just sounded good. And pulling it all apart of figuring out what is what is tough. But the main thing to remember is that it is almost always political over anything else.
Awesome!!!
Metal, working through serious life problems with music and lyrics since the late 70s
I love these reactions, if you are looking for inspirational lyrics look to some Killswitch Engage "I am broken too" very much inspried by mental healh/substance abuse and Hatebreed who sound aggressive but their lyrics are just so positive and inspirational. "This is now" is a great intro song.
The great misconceptions of me by Blackie Lawless is a must see for you!
falling in reverse It's a good band to react to, besides good clips, the lyrics are very deep
That would be so awesome!!!
I've always associated this song with insomnia and not being able to quiet the noise in your head. Longing for sleep.
My interpretation of the sacred silence and sleep is life. The silence being before birth and sleep being death. In betwwen those two. In between birth and death is life. Thats where we are. Somewhere in between life and death. 👍🏽 How you see it is interesting as well. The livimg moments between sleeping waiting for death. Everyday we wake up betweeen the two until we fall asleep again.