Before I do: Why We Broke Up
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- Опубліковано 3 жов 2024
- Struggling with a breakup? Check out our story of breaking up before I do.
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"Don't hope for that relationship to work, instead put your hope in the Lord" So beautiful, I love that.
This gives me so much hope because christian relationships are advertised as fairytales. It's not always that way. It could be a couple of breakups to realize God is developing you, before it can be beautiful~
you are so right!!
Amen!!! Trust the process if God has called it. Pray pray pray Gods will over you and the person He has chosen for you as your spouse.
So true. You are right
Kpopluvr94 😒😒 ugh tell me about it. When you are eagerly waiting for what God has you get hopeful thy the next one is “it”. Although their are flaws you confusingly think are we supposed to be with eachother anyways? It’s so hard. Takes prayers and tears to let go and keep on loving. It’s true tho it’s all painted as a perfect easy picture but it’s not.
"god" ... people still believe in books written by cave men in the Bronze Age. Happiest countries in the world are the least religious and have the best education systems.
The transparency is real. Thank you for sharing because Christian relationships are not perfect at all times. Thank you!
Heather I like how you stood up for yourself and didn't tolerate his behavior at the time. I like how you two put your pride aside at the end but I LOVE how you stood your ground and didn't allow him to mistreat you even though you know he was "the one".
Yes! Definately taught me a lesson
Yes because when you know he's the one these things catch you off guard. You expect it to go smoother lol.
"Pray for him to grow up" 😂😂😂😂
Shan Valentino IDK...we was only 22 tho haha
😂😂😂
Dude...he's looking at her like...omg😭😍😍😩
soooo sweet
Yes! Heather had healthy self-esteem and confidence.
I just love the way he's staring at his queen and forgets the camera's there! He's so mesmerized and probably thinking she's looking like a snack right now! Lol Daz Looove right there! God bless your marriage further! ❤️
Vanessa O. 😂 I was thinking that too
Vanessa O. yesssss I saw that so beautiful ❤❤❤❤
Ikr.. Lol.girl.you stole my thought
yasssss whew
It's hard to find Pastors who are this honest and real about relationships. You guys are a great role models and a blessing. The imperfect family man, God bless your family :)
I think Marcus Rogers is good at this too
hey friend.
The way he looks at you is EVERYTHING! 😩😍
😏 = Side Eye
"I can have any guy I want"
"Well go get him then" lol! ya'll. Love the authenticity. Preciate it.
This was so REAL and AUTHENTIC, My fave video by far ❤️ Cornelius is deffo me in a relationship haha. Would love to see a video on the difference between breaking up because its not right and breaking up because you are afraid. sometimes it's hard to tell... especially as Christians.
I would love to see a video on that too.
I love you Breeny you're awesome! It's cool that you like to watch Heather's videos too!
I am not kissing until my wedding day either. I have not kissed in 7 years now. It is too intimate.
Cheryl Richards ive noticed God really kept me from kissing boys. like that was a huge no no. I would feel He put barriers in between me and a guy i liked if I planned on kissing him.
yep. haven't kissed since 2012.
I haven't kiss a male in 23 years, except for my son on the cheek.
Yup- 2011 I believe.
Amen. Six years for me. I wanna wait for my wedding day too.
I absolutely HATE the saying "It is what it is."
Desiree Taylor yes me too
Desiree Taylor same😩
That’s an awesome saying...the older generation would use it to point things out to you that may be “in your face” when you may refuse to see things. It’s wisdom in that phrase...👍
Well... it is what it is😂
" I change women like I change underwear" he def. tried it 😩😩😩 thank God you guys got it together #blessings
He said this while he was a pastor???
@@dawnthompson9149 No but I remember he was in ministry at his church
I know, that would have been a red flag for me, I would've dropped him. But I guess they worked it out, so that's good.... sketchy if he was a leader for God too...
Nobody’s perfect. God uses imperfect vessels for His glory. Regardless if this man said that God clearly changed his heart for the better.
I think he was just being petty and pretending that he didn't care. We all do it !
Pride is a UGLY thing. So glad the spirit moved both of you to get it right.
Adam ran away when he was accused of disobeying God. Eve was prideful. This is something we have been dealing with for generations from the curse. We have to recognize this before we let something good run too far.
Sis your highlight is POPPPPPINNNNNN! Lol great video! Love you two!!!😘😘😘
Brittany Norman you can say that again💕💕💕👏
hahah! Thanks honey!!
make up came from the watchers, read enoch, it is sinful
Thanks for sharing the reality of a relationship. People always see the "perfect" image but fail to see the work behind it.
Thank you SO MUCH for being transparent. Relationships are not always rosy. Sometimes you break up and get back together, and sometimes you don't. Above all, I desire God's will for me or nothing else. 🤗🤗
WOW!!! This video is truly God sent....I'm facing something similar that I'm leaving in Gods hands and this video is reassurance that I need to pray for him and continue to seek Gods guidance. Thank you so much Heather and your husband. His insight really helped get a peak of a mans thoughts when his actions are off or inconsistent. This video is everything ❤️
maxine mirtil I am also in it! lol. Its interesting to get the man's perspective.
maxine mirtil Me too. Perfect timing!
maxine mirtil yup that male perspective was every thing
maxine how did it go?
People need to be open and honest when they share their testimony. It will bless more people.
This is the same thing I keep telling people, why when you speak to Christian couples they always want to tell singles that you got to be "whole" before GOD sends you a spouse...listen to the transparency and many internal flaws that Heather and Cornelius are sharing with us. Every Christian couple Ive spoken too have shared so many things they were still dealing with concerning relationships even "after" GOD sent their spouse. Its only through GOD's GRACE N MERCY and His PURPOSE as to why He sends you that spouse. Tfs yall and keepin it 💯✔✔✔
I actually feel like being in a healthy relationship can bring out dormant hurts and pain that need to be healed
I love how real you and your husband are!!!!!!
Its called self sabotaging because of fear.
WOW! Such honesty. "What you miss brotha?" LOL!!! I'm so glad y'all got back together too. Your marriage and example is such a blessing to people all over the world :)
There's no perfect when it comes to a relationship, but if you really love that person you will put in the effort for it just to be with her again.
You look so pretty Heather! & your hair is gorgeous! Love those earrings with that shirt! Go sis!💓
Heather: I am so glad we got back together and we get to live forever and ever🤗🤗
Cornelius: *eye roll* yeah yeah yeah
😂😂😂GOSH Y'ALL ARE SO FUNNY. I could watch you all day.
"I did the research." LOL thank you both for being vulnerable. The fact that people can see that your life is not picture pinterest perfect tears down these ideas that you all are.
LifeAsKia i
your hubby is such a good sport and the transparency is powerful. what i love about the lindsey ministry is although you both pastor, i actually see you two as regular people first. two souls made for one another and thats so awesome thanks for sharing.
I love the sass you have. I'd be like "bruh you either you take me now or imma walk away from you. I don't play those games!" It's fun to see a sassy godly woman! 😂😂
This was so powerful. I'm going through a situation with a man that I know God needs us to be apart for a while. This is a blessing. Thank you!
Jauné Jackson I feel you. How do we recognise it isn't just 'us' wanting it to be that way? I know both of our greatest desire is to serve in God's Kingdom and someday in our family too. But just a few days ago him and I both knew God was calling us to make the decision of ending it. I know He's brought us closer in our relationship and its like He wants our ALL while we are apart. I'm just trusting His plan. Because losing what mattered most to be showed me that my faith really was in other things. How are things for you now?
I love the natural chemistry between you two! Def something to admire 💕
Smiled and chuckled for most of this video. Definitely reminded me of my the courtship with my husband. It's amazing how strong emotions can get. So grateful the Holy Spirit is faithful even in our weaknesses. Thanks so much for sharing, guys!!
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS!!!🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 PERFECT FOR THIS GOOD GODLY MONDAY!!! AAAYYYYEEEE😁😁😁
LOL Yes I am at my desk like Okay, I am here for this on a monday! lol
Takima Howze Girl, YAAASSSSS🤣
Takima Howze me too!!!
LOL! Yes
Watching on a Monday too :O)
2019 and I needed to hear this. God’s timing is always on time.
This is setting women free. Thank you for sharing this. While I am embracing my singleness , I am looking forward to my man of God. These tips are helpful.
I wrote my non-negotiable's for a relationship out when I woke up this morning and then this video pops up in my notifications. Pastor Heather, thank you for being obedient to God because He is intentional and my life has been matching up with your messages. I can't fight it anymore. Thank you thank you.
Thanks for the transparency!!!
Big take always for me were:
- make sure you are whole - especially emotionally so you don’t have rejection and selfishness destroy your marriage
- make sure you have Godly counsel in courtship in order to keep hearing from God each step of the way
- women, wait for a man to decide that he wants to court you and make a commitment to that. ‘Thinking about us’ should happen before courting process !
- women, if he is unsure, be willing to walk away because you are worth more and never have to convince a man of that!!!
Thanks guys! ❤️❤️
Wow!!! Praise God for your transparency Mr. and Mrs. Lindsey!!! God bless you guys!!!
Currently going through similar issues. Just broke up with my bf of 9 months, two days ago. It truly hurts because I believe in my heart of hearts that he’s the man of God for me. No matter how much I want things to work I will trust in the Lord. He said in his word that “ All things work together for our good “ If it is in his will for us to get married it will happen . From now on out I will seek God’s face like never before and ask that the Holy Spirit be a comforter & guide . Thank you for this video ! It was very uplifting & encouraging .
🤗. I'll be praying for you
Any updates ?
Update
I love Heather! She's making him recall those moments they both had to be humbled. TFS!
Now we know where Taylor gets her spicy side from, lol.
Hahha, RIGHT? The Lord is working on my spicy. lol!
Lollll.... Same thing came to mind
Lollll.... Same thing came to mind
Y'all so cute together! It sickens my stomach and warms my spirit.
ashley moore 😂😂😂
ashley moore 😝 that’s a sweet comment. Haha
I love the way you guys look at each other. I can only hope to have a relationship like that some day.
This is real and makes you see that christian relationships have there highs and lows too .. I like the way you guys wait until each one is finished talking you can see the respect so clear xxxxx be blessed !!!
So glad you shared this! We need to understand the path to the promise is not always without challenges! As long as we stay close to God, He will lead and guide you to the Truth.
Heather girl that highlight is popppping! But honestly thank you both for your servanthood and transparency. God bless you both x
I love you guys transparency 😇! You both said the "key" word in this video and that is that you BOTH knew that God bought you two together and he confirmed between you two. That is what we all should listen for and that is listening to what the Holy Spirit is saying about the person in whom we are in relationship with because he will let you know if someone is your spouse or not. Blessings!
Erica Paul thanks sis i tell my sisters in the church this but i get mocked at and scorned..it is that simple..
"Lord is this the one for me"
yes my son then I go ahead..No my son then i pull back.
but our generation we wanna go on a million dates instead of following the simple plain ways of the Lord.
@@kala-adaidakariopusunju6809 Be Blessed in your DILIGENCE in seeking God's will. I pray you will focus in the meantime on what you need to do to be a good husband.
Pretty picture.
@@kala-adaidakariopusunju6809 That is true. We don't seek God like we should. We don't ask Him for direction and clarity.
Thank you so much for this message. When you said you knew you were gonna marriage each other, I thought it would be 100% "perfect". Thank so much to show the reality is that.... that courting is still a learning process but you will succeed when you stay obedient to the Lord!
This Message Gives Me Hope. Amen.
Thanks for sharing! I love how it was Cornelius that took the reigns when yall got back together. It definitely was an indicator of being the leader in the marriage. May God continue to bless your marriage.
This was sooo on time!!! Thank you guys for being transparent and obedient to God!! God is so amazing!!
wow. i relate. I LOVE how he admits he was full of pride. broke up with my bf a month ago cuz he was the same. acting up, full of pride, was far from jesus, etc. Ive been praying that god can soften his heart and help him mature cuz i do belive he is my husband. This gives me hope that god can change people and bring them back together
Did you get back together?
Very great segment. I'm grateful for the transparency. This is helping me understand some things.
Love y'all your definitely one of my marriage mentors!
So wise, so many of us naturally do this (push people away or run away)
I love your realness Heather!!! Your personality is everything 😂😍
Thank you guys for this.. A mans perspective is always good!!
Wonderful story! Thanks so much for sharing. I broke up with my ex a few months ago but the Holy Spirit tells me up keep praying for him and to be patient in the process. And I've felt the same way! I would say he's going to be some other woman's wife why pray for him! Haha. After seeing your video it's definitely confirmation that I must be obedient and keep him in prayer. And like you said in another post/ video " instead of chasing a man stay in the word and study scriptures"! Lol . Heather, you've been a blessing to me and helped me grow in Christ. I thank God for you. I'll continue to keep you and your ministry in prayer. Love you Sis.
Rita Style stay obedient sis. From the moment I met my ex I knew that was my husband. Right now, I think God doesn't want us to be together at the moment. I pray for him daily. Stay strong. I will keep you in my prayers too.
Thank you Jaune for your words of encouragement. I appreciate your prayers and will keep you in my prayers as well. Take care and God bless.
@@jaunejacksondo you have an update?
The way he looks at her... Lord Jesus, help me wait on your man for me.
How could anybody dislike this video? Love you guys!!!
First off I didn't know Heather was that shorter than her husband and second, I love this love that you and your husband share for each other and pray you guys keep fighting although I know you guys will and thank you guys for being so open with us because there are people like me trying to have a godly relationship and it helps to see how successful it is to allow God to be at the center of your relationships.
lol! I always wear 5 inch heels. lol!
When she said " I did the research "
I hollered!! You go girl 💪🏽. I ❤️ you both
So on time...exactly what I'm going through right now. God bless you guys 😊
Unless God breaks u guys up bc ur in different seasons and u have to trust Gods timing. We’ve gotten back together a few times but bc he was looking for a job & stressed & I was not realizing I was rushing Gods timing, things got thrown out of alignment & I battled spiritual warfare & it’s been a crazy ride figuring out how to trust God when nothing makes sense. 11 months but God doesn’t lie & I’ve experienced things no one believes bc God is proving to me he is real & to trust him. It’s been the hardest battle of my life but no one in the Bible had it easy. We all get rewarded for our faith in the end. I hope once my story is complete I can help others going thru difficult uncertainty as well
This video was still a blessing to me, even as a content single.
Why do people enter relationships prematurely when they know they’re not ready? It’s so unfair to the other person. I know some can be immature though
She is hilarious. To the Holy Spirit, "Pray for him?? I'mma pray he grows up, that steps up to the plate!" Lol
I just want to cry right now!!!! Thank you guys soooo much for this post!!! Heather it's like you totally get me!!!! Thank you guys for your obedience!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! And big thanks to mama Lindsey and sister Lindsey!!! Lol
Thanks for the video. So honest and real. Many of us still have walls up and issues we need to deal with prior to marriage. God Bless you and your husband.
This has opened my mind. I wish every guy would come on UA-cam and share what he was thinking in certain phases and moments in a relationship. Thank You for sharing.
WOW!!! This video is almost 2 years old and this right in my face when I open up UA-cam!!! The title got me!! I dated the same guy 3 times and I was rejected three times and he came back a 4th time and he ask me to marry him!! Mind you he was the one who kept coming back pursuing me. He refused to admit that he was still hurting and he kept blaming me saying that guys must have really hurt me in the past but it was him all this time but he refuse to accept it! He loves women and the attention they give him but he will not commit. So this time I left him God said no!! God is working on me preparing me. And to watch this video everything that is being said that was me and the guy I dated! But it’s over I don’t what he’s doing I blocked him on all social media!!!! Thank you for posting and sharing your stories!!! Congratulations
Wow. Cornelius is just like me! While he's talking, I see why God is changing me so much. I tend to put up a wall as well when people are getting too close to me because I don't want to hurt them nor do I want them to hurt me. And, I have commitment issues. I appreciate and love the single season because God is able to reveal these things to you and make you better for your future spouse. Thanks for sharing guys.. God bless! 😊
Krystal V M Yes me too! I was watching the video and noticed that I'm like a girl version of Cornelius, so I definitely understand where he is coming from. You are dead on about the commitment issues. lol I know for sure that God is molding me in this season.
3:34 - 3:38 "Duces, "intro-Duces" 2 fingers in the air" lmbooo i can't!
This video is so helpful as i am going through the same thing. Like been praying for clarity and patience. Its been challenging to differentiate between being patient & letting him go and its only been a month of us courting.
I love this story!!! They are being so honest! The love is real ❤️❤️❤️
I don't know if marriage is for me, but it's definitely a desire in my heart. And I love you two testimony, I love what God has done in your lives. 😍❤
Trina 2Fit2Quit who do you think has put that desire into your heart? :) if you desire to get married then rest assured.... God is preparing HER for you right now! :)
Nurdan Baran thank you and your right about the desire, but not about the "Her" part cause I am a "Her" lol So its "Him" Im waiting for, but thanks for the encouragement.
Trina 2Fit2Quit oooops! Sorry!!!!
Nurdan Baran no worries 😂
I just love how real you guys are you just find that anymore GOD BLESS YOU
Just to chime in. It does matter who reaches out. If he left you, don't reach out. Let go and move on. If he reach out you can decide if you want to go there again
"hold up Ma, you MY mama...you have no affiliation with Heather" LOL #loveit
Do you have family in Florida Crystal?
I stumbled on the video on how u knew he was your husband and then i happened to see this. I needed this. On 18 june my finace ended our relationship. We were to get marry on the 15 july but due to circumstances it was postponed to Dec 16. I love this man so much. I literally have almost everything to be a bride except my shoe and bouquet. I prayed for a man who loves the Lord and is willing to grow spiritually with me. I love to sing for the Lord and I always wanted to be with someone who could do the same. In feb 2015 we happened to start chatting on fb and then started talking on the phone. I felt so much like he is God sent because he is all that I ask the Lord for. However, he was living in one of the islands but Im here at home. I developed a relationship with his parents whom I got to love and they are people who really love the Lord and does His work and I felt its where I belong. However he came home last dec, we enjoy spending time together, we sing together, I would go by him and he would come by me, it was nice. Btw we never had sex because Im keeping that for my husband when Im married. We had issues but we dealt with them. But I noticed his behaviour changed about 2 months ago. He would harldly call or text or make time to see me. I would ask about it and he would choose not to tell me why. It made me very confused and frustrated.After some time he started to blame my family and things just got out of control because he had this anger and rage inside of him. I ask the Lord if it is His will let it be done. Sometimes I feel like he doesnt want to be committed. But I know if God wants us together he will send him back to me. Although it pains alot because I even lost my grandmother 3 months ago so the emotional pain is just terrible. Nevertheless let God's will be done.
Virtuous Woman may God be with you. Im going trough similar situations. I ll be glad to talk with you. He has changed and is almost always angry and treathened to cancelled our "wedding" many times...do you have a clue why he suddently changed?
Joyeuse Hope do u have any way i can contact u
I can completely relate to this. I pray that God’s presence has increased in your life and that you are more in love with Jesus than ever. God bless you.
I think you need to move on with your life. Do not just sit there and wait on this man. He may waste your time. Just ask God to send you a God fearing good man who is loving, ambitious and faithful. I here doing the same.
Hi doll same situation here. I'm 43 he is 46 and he broke up with me twice. We never have sex in 8 months of dating. So the second time I let him go. He goes to a Baptist church and I go to a Pentecostal. When I suggested to go together to my church he broke up again. Better being single than walking on eggshells .
I LOVE how real this is!! Especially from the male perspective!
The intro had me rollingggg 😂😂😂 Heatherrr you're so funny and inspiring me to be free in complimenting my future husband as well! I pray the Lord blesses you guys abundantly! Thank you for the transparant video I love it! 💕
you're hair looks amazing ! love the transparency 👏🏽
Hi Heather! During your breakup you said you thought, “God maybe I just missed You” meaning that you thought you heard God wrong about Cornelius being your husband, right? Even though it was a short lived thought, in that time, how did you come to terms with the reality that you may have been so wrong about what you thought was the Holy Spirit’s revelation? Did it not worry you that you were so convinced that Cornelius was it and then you were so convinced that he wasn’t at another time? I’m struggling with this currently and it has really taken a toll on my trust in my ability to discern. Like how could I be so wrong about something that I was so sure was the Lord?
You don't know how much I needed this! I'm in this situation right now.
I love them both, their relationship dynamic!! I want to meet them they've been such a blessing from podcast, books, the show 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Heather your makeup is always so beautiful! Your highlight is gorgeous 😍 just wanted to say that and also thank you for all the hard work you and your husband do to help us on our walks with The Lord. I've learned so much from you . I appreciate y'all so much. Sounds silly over UA-cam but it's true. Thank you!
Love this transparency. I'm enjoying reading Fighting Together as well. Gives me hope. I'm looking forward to see how God will work in my marriage.
So needed for the season I'm in! Blessings to you both!
I love how he honours her speech. I love her confidence for sure, being able to own her beliefs and trust her discernment. Super inspirational.
I was looking at another sermon and I came across this, God is so intentional. I am going through this exact same thing! I was engaged and now we are broken up, but I KNOW that he is my husband and I'm standing on that. In the process I am growing more and I am learning more about my purpose and who I am! This video encouraged me soo much. I'm praying for him that God deals with his pride issue and mine because we both have been prideful. God keeps giving me encouragement like this, dreams, and other people! I can't wait until God does this! I will be back with the testimony!! ❤❤❤❤
Tee Pringle whatsup?
this is great....I really like this guy and I was getting soo many signs that this man could potentially be the one, like everything I prayed about was being answered.. but then out of the blue he tells me he feels like all great men in history have had more than one woman by their side and one woman cannot give a man everything he needs and in the same breath say he wants to get married! I'm soo done.. quite confused on how this all has turned out, but I'm better than that...
missb19822010 Sounds like God needs to change his mentality a little. Is he saved?
@@shanataylor7252 exactly. Because no matter how many people you find, whether 1 person or 1000, PEOPLE are NOT able to give you everything you need period - we are so supposed to be looking to God as our provider and only worry about SERVING Him and one another, not worrying about what other people can or cannot do for you so if you want to marry, you need to know that means to love, honor and serve...not seek to be served.
I've never heard that one before sis he threw me for a loop lol I too pray he renews his mind in Christ instead of believing in poor examples. Glad you know you need better than that!
I love how open you are and yourself in your videos! I’ve loved you and watching you for years!! When I was a teenager I looked at you for relationship advice because like you, I turned to guys to feel that void and found you in a time of my life I needed that encouragement!
Why is it that guys always tell women that they knew that they were going to be there wife at first sight but they tend not to treat those same women right ?
oh my! Thank you both! your transparency blesses me! bless you both and the babies!! 😍
Oh I so needed to hear this! So glad I came across it.
I simply adore this video. Your story. It’s more relatable to me than the others I’ve seen. Thank you for sharing. I will definitely focus on God, and not the relationship.
Love the transparency!❤️