The Worst Guide To Noita

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  • Опубліковано 20 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,2 тис.

  • @FuryForged
    @FuryForged 8 місяців тому +3601

    What an absolutely great and entertaining video! I know you want to take a stab at helping solve the eyes... Just think of how interesting it would be, lol. Thanks for the mention!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +429

      DUDE! I'd be lost without you! The problem with solving the eyes is that people way smarter than me are already stumped, but I waNNA KNOW THEIR SECRETS SO BAD!
      Thanks so much for the amazing content (Noita and otherwise). This video wouldn't have been possible without your influence on the community. And thank you for giving me permission to use your content a while back (if you remember lol). There was zero chance of me reaching the cauldron room and staying sane.

    • @KeithSammut
      @KeithSammut 8 місяців тому +20

      Absolutely amazing video. You scratched all the itches. You are a video genius.

    • @smartsmartie7142
      @smartsmartie7142 8 місяців тому +6

      Thank you FuryForged for all the janky videos!

    • @aliciawelch3127
      @aliciawelch3127 8 місяців тому +5

      @@connorconquersfor really!

    • @kfkfod
      @kfkfod 8 місяців тому +8

      the more i see fury talk about the eyes the more it feels like hes in a cult

  • @milovogel1568
    @milovogel1568 8 місяців тому +1445

    man. watching him talk about a god run reminds me of a dnd wizard quote, "the only difference between me and godhood is an eight hour rest" -lvl 9 wizard

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +168

      Welllll, I'm stealing that quote, thanks.

    • @danieljames1868
      @danieljames1868 6 місяців тому +89

      "You are as skilled as my information lead me to believe. I must admit, I too have a passion for the arcane arts... even moreso than others of my kind.
      I am curious, however...what would happen if we turned the magic off?"
      [ANTIMAGIC FIELD]
      "Fascinating. It appears you cease to be a mighty wizard and become a fragile pointy-eared monkey. While I?
      I am still a dragon."
      - Order of the Stick

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 5 місяців тому +12

      I mean as a simple example, I'm on a run right now where I click on things (through walls? Sure, doesn't matter) and they just die, meanwhile I'm effectively unkillable and have been amusing myself by tunneling randomly through the earth and finding areas and quests and bosses I never knew about.
      Only thing is I missed picking up a boss perk because it died somewhere offscreen and I never actually found the body, since I had to spend like 10 minutes playing tag with its minions that seem to be immune to most everything, swapping out spells while being shot until I found a combo that would work. Oh well, next time I guess.

    • @therookiegamer2727
      @therookiegamer2727 2 місяці тому +1

      wouldn't that be level 17+ for dnd? (at least 5e)

    • @milovogel1568
      @milovogel1568 2 місяці тому

      @@therookiegamer2727 pathfinder 1e :)

  • @agathaknive3321
    @agathaknive3321 8 місяців тому +3054

    This should be the official ad for noita.

    • @spearfanatic6267
      @spearfanatic6267 8 місяців тому +38

      You are not immune to propaganda

    • @blad...
      @blad... 8 місяців тому +20

      Nah, this is way better for veterans.

    • @CompoundedProblems
      @CompoundedProblems 8 місяців тому +6

      Hey man, your videos are incredible. They're well written, funny, have great pacing and editing, among a bunch of other things. Keep up the great work and thank you!

    • @ZombieGuy2401
      @ZombieGuy2401 8 місяців тому +17

      Got me to buy it lol

    • @isaz2425
      @isaz2425 6 місяців тому +14

      a bit too muc spoiler for an ad, but it's a great video.

  • @Fighterman481
    @Fighterman481 7 місяців тому +69

    'Yeah I can make a Geneva Convention violation with a couple bubbles' has been living rent-free in my head for a while now because it's too true. I think of it every time I start wand crafting in the early game lol.

  • @PendragonDaGreat
    @PendragonDaGreat 7 місяців тому +674

    "We're on Made in Abyss Rules"
    and that sentence right there explains so much in one little quip

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +222

      I was like, "There's a small subset of people who will be utterly horrified by that line but will instantly understand the danger of an ascent."

    • @PendragonDaGreat
      @PendragonDaGreat 7 місяців тому +58

      The ultimate Mr. Incredible "If you know you know" meme.

    • @flamingturnip
      @flamingturnip 6 місяців тому +13

      ​@@JamesJames-li2wvquip is a word

    • @flamingturnip
      @flamingturnip 6 місяців тому +16

      @@JamesJames-li2wvman, look it up. Quip with a Q is ALSO a word. And it is the correct word for the way it was used. You're picking at this for no reason.

    • @bretginn1419
      @bretginn1419 5 місяців тому +16

      It really does. Whenever I hear Made in Abyss, it just triggers "Ah shit, here we go again" in my head.
      It's right below "I. Hear. A. Sound." for me.

  • @DunkOrSlam
    @DunkOrSlam 7 місяців тому +513

    thanks for the shoutout. Great highlight of the madness that is Noita! Get in there!!

  • @12345wery
    @12345wery 8 місяців тому +1190

    The average Noita run tends to end once you have decided you have killed god in enough universes

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +243

      But then the only god left is yourself 👀

    • @ExiledZug
      @ExiledZug 8 місяців тому +199

      The average noita run ends by catching a stray magic bolt or touching a pixel of polyjuice

    • @Guaxinobers
      @Guaxinobers 8 місяців тому +44

      @@connorconquers that's why you end it, you would be killing every god in that timeline

    • @ZawaOnYoutube
      @ZawaOnYoutube 7 місяців тому +47

      Funny, my runs end two to three zones deep, I fuckin suck at this game

    • @achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233
      @achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233 7 місяців тому +20

      @@connorconquers There is only one god. I made sure of it.

  • @willmungas8964
    @willmungas8964 8 місяців тому +191

    This is the spiritual successor to Albino’s “Noita: A Roguelike for the Mentally Deranged” but more instructional and I love it

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +39

      Thanks! I was put off of making this because that video is what got me into Noita and I didn't think I could make something anywhere near that good. I still think his is better but I'm happy with what I made lol

  • @JavaSteel
    @JavaSteel 8 місяців тому +803

    This rivals Albino’s videos in terms of editing and fans recognise fans because this oozes maggot energy

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +215

      I debated showing a Noita maggot instead of his channel pic during the recommended channels bit lol

    • @JavaSteel
      @JavaSteel 8 місяців тому +30

      @@connorconquers lmao that would have been funny

  • @synka5922
    @synka5922 8 місяців тому +275

    5:35 Foreshadowing is a narrative device in which a storyteller gives an advance hint of what is to come later in the story. Foreshadowing often appears at the beginning of a story, and it helps develop or subvert the audience's expectations about upcoming events.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +89

      The secret is lying. Subscribe for more advanced storytelling techniques.

    • @Wolffanghurricane
      @Wolffanghurricane 8 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquerstrue!

    • @gwen9939
      @gwen9939 8 місяців тому +7

      Hbomberguy is gonna sue you for plagiarism

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +3

      @@gwen9939 It was real the whole time! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    • @Ilias2
      @Ilias2 7 місяців тому

      ​@@connorconquers OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE THE ONE PIECE! 😱😱😱

  • @derram0k
    @derram0k 8 місяців тому +524

    That tablet is one of the greatest trolls I've ever come across in a video game.
    Sacrifice of oneself to the pursuit of knowledge is the highest tribute to the gods.
    And all you can do is sit there.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +159

      This game has a commitment to messing with the player that's almost unrivaled. I love it.

    • @fishydids
      @fishydids 8 місяців тому +108

      One must imagine Mina happy.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +88

      @@fishydids Myth of Sysiphus jumpscare in my comment notifications, wtf. This guy Camus.

    • @marzipancutter8144
      @marzipancutter8144 8 місяців тому +38

      Well you can also slurp up all the water blocking the entrance and wait minutes on end digesting it. It's what I did the first time.

    • @kid14346
      @kid14346 8 місяців тому +27

      ​@fishydids Note I don't speak Finnish, but I read somewhere that Mina is the written format of "Me", "I", or "Mine". Which honestly "One has to imagine me happy." Whle discussing Noita is poetic with how bullshit it gets...

  • @The_Ant_Eater_404
    @The_Ant_Eater_404 8 місяців тому +2955

    "drinking the transition juice in noita is about the same as doing it in Florida because our chances of survival just plummeted" 🤣😂😭😭 too real ._.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +838

      I almost cut that joke because I thought it might be "too real" but I really love making fun of that cesspit of a state.

    • @The_Ant_Eater_404
      @The_Ant_Eater_404 8 місяців тому +207

      @@connorconquers god, I love your channel, pls keep cooking

    • @ruby_wired
      @ruby_wired 8 місяців тому +445

      Trans rights!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +429

      @@ruby_wired WalterWhite_YoureGodDamnRight.mp4

    • @ThylineTheGay
      @ThylineTheGay 8 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquersridiculing shithole places and showing support for trans people is such a good combo

  • @nightbot6415
    @nightbot6415 8 місяців тому +311

    16:36 At that very moment I thought that this was the limit of the game, I was wrong

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +82

      Get scammed. This game is insane lol.

    • @Asta_The_Necromancer
      @Asta_The_Necromancer 8 місяців тому +4

      @@connorconquers I know I probably wont get a reply but... what was the music you used for the god runs intro? it sounds epic and I'd love to listen to more. Also, hi. from one fungus shifter to another.

    • @Asta_The_Necromancer
      @Asta_The_Necromancer 8 місяців тому +9

      @@connorconquers nevermind, I'm an idiot who didn't look at the description.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +14

      @@Asta_The_Necromancers'all good! glad you found it! Now lets get back to shifting blood to poly.

    • @shebazraza4746
      @shebazraza4746 6 місяців тому

      I knew there was a reveal coming due to what we saw in the previous 16 minutes

  • @DarkViperAU
    @DarkViperAU 8 місяців тому +141

    Great video mate. I appreciate anyone who continues to help spread the word of this beautiful game.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +5

      Thanks! Glad you liked it. Also, dig your channel, always nice to see people enjoy the games I work on 😉

  • @kanjiNaem
    @kanjiNaem 8 місяців тому +33

    19:50 "there is absolutely no way the homing mist could ever backfire"

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +10

      My literal thoughts before discovering poly made you targetable. See also: piercing.

  • @Tekdruid
    @Tekdruid 8 місяців тому +336

    I must salute my countrymen for making the most insanely complex, rage quit inducing games out there, like Noita and My Summer Car.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +55

      They're cooking hard over there and I love them for it.

    • @phantomdergwulf
      @phantomdergwulf 7 місяців тому +34

      dont forget: Baba Is You and ULTRAKILL

    • @Mabswer
      @Mabswer 7 місяців тому +18

      Or fear and hunger..

    • @FairyRat
      @FairyRat 7 місяців тому +4

      Finland best land.

    • @Robin_Goodfellow
      @Robin_Goodfellow 6 місяців тому +7

      And Linux

  • @maxmasher2597
    @maxmasher2597 8 місяців тому +860

    You know you have too many hours in Noita when you recognize that the really complex wand example was a parallel world travel wand.
    Excellent video as always!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +329

      They have to be the most batshit kind of wand. I have no idea how someone figured that out. "Watch as I shift reality using a deer."

    • @miroslavzderic3192
      @miroslavzderic3192 8 місяців тому +86

      and the fact that there are some based on swapping with an animal, some using the new inner spell, some casting a projectile that casts another one back at you. the fact there are more completely different ways of doing the most insane thing is most mind boggling to me.

    • @secretmeister
      @secretmeister 8 місяців тому +11

      I havent played the game much, but dont look at the percentage f fury's video's ive ewatched...

    • @specialgorilla
      @specialgorilla 8 місяців тому +9

      GOD SAME! After a certain amount of Noita certain things get seared into your mind lmao

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +21

      @@specialgorilla I always have a tab for it open when I get a good run going and bring each spell back to my tree for storage as I progress lol.

  • @thehansboi
    @thehansboi 8 місяців тому +364

    Oh my god at the beginning of the video I was like "woa this game looks cool" and then you pull out THE WHOLE MAP and my puny brain just exploded. When I first saw this game by myself before this video I thought it was just some kind of terraria with pixel physics simulation but holy moly I didn't know this game was that big

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +78

      It's honestly wild. And I left out SO MUCH.

    • @thehansboi
      @thehansboi 8 місяців тому +9

      @@connorconquers yea I can see how lmao

    • @chaotickreg7024
      @chaotickreg7024 8 місяців тому +18

      "The Work" is just the tutorial.

    • @Zaburino
      @Zaburino 8 місяців тому +10

      Yeah... that wasn't the whole map.

    • @Hydrazine1000
      @Hydrazine1000 8 місяців тому +8

      Oh sweet summer child!😂
      There is the whole map. Yes, that's quite a bit more than the biomes you need to traverse. Then there are the parallel worlds, 512 to the east and 512 to the west. Oh, and this game also does New Game Plus.

  • @Guile21
    @Guile21 8 місяців тому +24

    This is the most perfect video to encapsulate the full Noita experience in 22 minutes. I'm thouroughly amazed. Definitely the best guide to Noita!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +3

      There's so much I wanted to cover but felt it would be too overwhelming or complicated. I'm hoping I left enough surprises for people who decide to pick up the game.

  • @acarter9806
    @acarter9806 5 місяців тому +9

    I love Noita because it's one of very few games that truly allows for the power progression you would expect from becoming an endgame character. In most games even the strongest player characters would still be blocked in by things like walls, locked doors, and invisible fences even if they can turn a room full of enemies into red sauce with one shot. But in Noita, respecting the terrain is more like a choice once you've got infinite black holes or lumidrills.

  • @umbra4540
    @umbra4540 8 місяців тому +147

    the death by polymorph is so real tho. absolutely hate that shit.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +36

      My feelings on death by poly change based on how recently it's happened to me. The longer its been the more I like it. Then it happens and I uninstall the game for a month.

    • @umbra4540
      @umbra4540 8 місяців тому +4

      @@connorconquers god exactly. it's necessary balance wise, but i wish there were at least some kind of counter play you could do to reduce it when you're in the sky work. can't even see those goddamn pixels most of the time, and it's the worst feeling when you open a chest to find a nice little chaotic poly flask just waiting to burst all over you and ruin your good start

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +9

      @@umbra4540 I don't go to the skywork unless I have to. Hell is so much safer if I'm looking for high tier spells. Some counter play would be nice but then this wouldn't be Noita.

    • @umbra4540
      @umbra4540 8 місяців тому +3

      @@connorconquers true enough. i only go up there if im doing a sun quest, but poly juice is still tricky outside of the sky work

    • @2Supersonic2003
      @2Supersonic2003 8 місяців тому +11

      (Mild spoilers)
      The only “counterplay” I know of involves getting lucky with a fungal shift turning all polymorphine in the world into some other substance or by consuming the flesh of a polymorph mage (which is extremely tedious and ineffective if you want it to last for a long time)

  • @tirnos739
    @tirnos739 8 місяців тому +47

    Good to see more attention being paid to this under represented gem of a game! Also, 'Return to Monke' is my new name for homing stone wands. Another favorite of mine is Fireball Orbit + Triplicate Bolt. Put this on a high-rate wand and it become "Delete everything in front of me" very quickly.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +8

      That's one of my favorites also but I didn't want to talk about orbit spells because I wanted people to be surprised by the Dragon. Orbit + Triplicate Bolt has saved so many of my runs.

    • @Raoul.
      @Raoul. 8 місяців тому +7

      "Delete that direction"

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      @@Raoul. lmao, basically.

    • @ginnyliz460
      @ginnyliz460 7 місяців тому +5

      My partner and I call the homing stone wand "rock friend" in the tone one uses to greet your dog after a long day at work

  • @i_am_ergo
    @i_am_ergo 8 місяців тому +102

    I think with this one, you were mere planck units away from embracing full sseth-ness. Which is neither good nor bad, as both paths are paths to greatness.
    Amazing video, Connor, truly.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +26

      lol I'm trying really hard to carve out my own style but I think we'll always be close style-wise since a lot of his writing structure is just straight up best practices. I do feel kinda bad because I borrowed so much from Sseth for my Oxygen Not Included video. I wasn't comfortable with my own narration at that time and basically stole his speaking initiations. It's still an honor to be compared to one of my inspirations though.

    • @i_am_ergo
      @i_am_ergo 8 місяців тому +10

      @@connorconquers There's not a doubt in my mind that you'll eventually arrive at a style that's comfortably your own. Ssethian, but also clearly distinguishable from him. Will just take time and practice. I'm really glad that I was playing ONI and looking up ONI videos around the time you uploaded your guide. One of my best subs on UA-cam, hands down. Keep on keeping on!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +6

      @@i_am_ergo Thanks, that honestly means a lot to me.

    • @jdirksen
      @jdirksen 8 місяців тому +2

      I’d say closer to a cleaner and more intelligible Maxxor and that’s honestly peak

  • @surr3ald3sign
    @surr3ald3sign 8 місяців тому +19

    "And THIS is the rest of the world" *laughs in infinite parallel dimensions*

  • @LunarAquatics1
    @LunarAquatics1 8 місяців тому +45

    Ive had this game in my library for years and have played tens of runs. I did not know it had 1/5th this amount of depth

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +22

      It really does a great job of TELLING YOU NOTHING and just hoping you figure it out.

    • @clausleitner4520
      @clausleitner4520 7 місяців тому +1

      time to reinstall and slave away!

    • @Agamemnon9
      @Agamemnon9 7 місяців тому

      *dozens

  • @plopfish
    @plopfish 8 місяців тому +120

    Insane levels of quality and infotainment from a 5K subbed channel. This channel will (deservedly) blow up. Great work Connor!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +4

      Thank you! Fingers crossed the algorithm likes it 🤖

    • @Tsumimoi
      @Tsumimoi 8 місяців тому

      ⁠😅p😅lo😅😅o ppl p

    • @starknuckle6219
      @starknuckle6219 8 місяців тому +4

      @@connorconquers I think your wish is being granted! congrats dude, this vid rules

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      @@starknuckle6219 Its doing a lot better than I expected and I'm pretty stoked about it ngl

    • @Hust91
      @Hust91 6 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquers 373k views, a hair off 25k subscribers. :>

  • @bastian5861
    @bastian5861 8 місяців тому +56

    your wit and humor is unrivaled. I wish I could watch your stuff for the first time again. Also the production quality and density of content is off the charts

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +5

      Thank you! I'm learning more with every video, both with scripting and production.

  • @uncle-woody-1
    @uncle-woody-1 8 місяців тому +32

    After 500+ hours of Noita, I can confidently say I'm still a beginner 🤣
    That was a really excellent video. The way you presented the Lava Lake really captured the self-paced reward (and pain) of exploring Noita's universe.
    To everyone else, there's still loads of moments like that to discover and experience.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      It seemed like the perfect thing to fixate on since it really captured everything this game is about. And it's crazy how after so many hours there is still do much to discover. I'm still finding new stuff out all the time.

    • @Frommerman
      @Frommerman 6 місяців тому +3

      The first time I crossed the lava and saw the bridge, I was still spoiler-free. My first thought was "If I cross this bridge, I am 100% certain I will die. Welp. Guess I better find out WHY I die."
      Then I died.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +2

      @@Frommerman "The sacrifice of oneself to the pursuit of knowledge Is the highest tribute to the gods."

    • @uncle-woody2
      @uncle-woody2 6 місяців тому

      @@FrommermanYou’re gonna go far kid 😂 Keep going my man!

  • @Jase_LV
    @Jase_LV 7 місяців тому +7

    The video format is definetely a recipe for success. It gives deeper and deeper insights in to the game and just when you think it's done, there comes "but wait, there's more!" moment. Can see this really taking of if you manage to keep pulling of such quality content.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      Thanks! I had a few ahha moments when it came to scripting this one that I wanna try to carry forward.

  • @LethalLimit
    @LethalLimit 6 місяців тому +6

    My favorite thing about this video is watching it once, buying Noita, playing it, getting confused so you watch it again, play more Noita, squeeze out a win after 90 runs, eventually watching this video again, and STILL getting helpful info that you didn't understand before, and it gets funnier and every time you watch it too. Can't wait to get a god run then watch this again to relate better.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +1

      I was worried this would be information overload but I'm glad it's having the desired effect!

  • @madamepestilence
    @madamepestilence 8 місяців тому +50

    I swear your ability to show off the strength of games is unmatched

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +3

      It's easy when the games are amazing.

  • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
    @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 5 місяців тому +7

    The only true extent of Noita being how much your computer can handle reminds me of a bit of Warhammer lore where Lord Kroak was firing so many spells out of his froggy ass that time started to stop as reality itself started to lag.

    • @OctyabrAprelya
      @OctyabrAprelya 3 місяці тому +1

      Oh, that's why time stops in black holes... 🤔

  • @tehcodekid8421
    @tehcodekid8421 8 місяців тому +17

    This feels like a Max0r summary without the seizure-inducing montages and goddamn does it appeal to me.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +3

      He's a huge inspiration but I don't think I could edit that quick if I wanted to lol

  • @unprankable666
    @unprankable666 6 місяців тому +11

    My first perk I ever got was the one that let me tinker anywhere. I could feel my luck disintegrating by the nanosecond.

  • @JimmyRei1000
    @JimmyRei1000 6 місяців тому +5

    This stuff is a *lot* of fun. I love when I'm lucky enough to be on the ground floor when someone's just getting started, and obviously has a ton of talent and drive.
    I saw your tease for Factorio coming up, and honestly, , I can't wait to see what you do next.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +1

      Hoping to finish the 1st draft of the script by tomorrow and start editing by next weekend!

  • @Selfg12
    @Selfg12 6 місяців тому +5

    I watch this video everytime I'm burnt out and it keeps bringing me back to play more. Props to DunkorSlam for linking it.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +1

      I was like that with Albino's video lol. Glad you're sticking it out, king.

  • @fern_farm
    @fern_farm 8 місяців тому +13

    This video is amazing, the part where you explained wands and highlighted the spells slots in the wand as it was happening was very well done!
    Hope many new people see this and experience the amazing things Noita has to offer....
    (or buys it to ragequit after losing a god tun to poly🤣)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Thanks! I was really happy with how that part came out. Also, I've actually rage uninstalled the game 3 times because of poly deaths. It's part of the process 🥰

  • @alexnoya6910
    @alexnoya6910 7 місяців тому +3

    I just found your channel and I cannot describe how sad I was that you had only the videos you had. Can't wait for more, your stuff is incredible!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +2

      Workin' on it! Two guides in progress and I'm trying to figure out some more formats to fill in the gaps.

  • @frosty9219
    @frosty9219 8 місяців тому +2

    Having never played before, what broke me was the fact you could GO PAST the cursed rock to find an entirely new world.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      It's crazy cuz the first time you zoom the map out (I didn't even show all of it) you're like, "wow this game is crazy!" And then the game goes, "Oh you thought, eh?"

  • @surr3ald3sign
    @surr3ald3sign 8 місяців тому +8

    "Finnish, alchemic, fanfiction" was like a 3 piece combo from Iron Mike Tyson

  • @unr4g3ux37
    @unr4g3ux37 8 місяців тому +55

    11:27 Rest in peace little noit.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +9

      Pour one out for all the noits that died to make this video possible 😭

    • @Sornok
      @Sornok 2 місяці тому

      After I saw how much HP you had when dying in the lava lake the first time, I had to commend your dedication to make a great video. That would probably take me about 2-4 hours on an average seed to get that much HP

  • @devinwindfield5380
    @devinwindfield5380 8 місяців тому +10

    Duuuuuude I literally just found your video on ONI yesterday. Absolutely loved it, despite never having actually played, watched all the rest of you videos, subbed the hell up, and got a little sad you can only post every few months. But you've already got another video out?? Oh how the stars have aligned today 🙏 keep up the good stuff man, take your time and stay grounded in your style

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Thanks! Last year was a little rough between work and my appendix trying to kill me. I've been getting a lot better at writing scripts so hopefully it won't be SEVERAL MONTHS between vids. Also if you have any game suggestions I'd love to hear them!

  • @shirolune
    @shirolune 3 місяці тому +4

    The Gregorius theme for god runs is such a perfect choice 17:15

  • @velcrow202
    @velcrow202 8 місяців тому +5

    Love the videos, and thank you for having the music used playlist, i hate not finding a song because they don't list it.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +3

      SAME! There's usually some saint putting music up in the comments of the video that doesn't have it but I wanna save people the trouble lol

  • @SimonCleric
    @SimonCleric 8 місяців тому +6

    One of the best videos I've ever seen. Not just for Noita. Not just gaming videos. Videos. Period. Perfect pacing, amazing editing, and also huge respect for the "music used in video" in the description. Basically, perfect.
    I wonder if it's just a coincidence that both this and "Fear and Hunger" have Finnish devs... hmmmm...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Thank you! I so glad you liked it! I really had a blast writing the script for this.
      Also, yeah, I dunno what's going on with Finnish game devs but I don't ever want them to stop cooking.

  • @Proud_Knight
    @Proud_Knight 8 місяців тому +6

    "No.. Not like this..."
    _Truer words have never been spoken_

  • @Sukole
    @Sukole 8 місяців тому +11

    Happy to see a new video from you! I have heard of Noita before, great to have you make a video about it, thank you very much! :)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      It's one of my favorite games. I hate it so much.

    • @Sukole
      @Sukole 8 місяців тому +2

      @@connorconquers That's absolutely understandable. I am not yet sure whether or not I am masochistic enough to play it

    • @atomsk01
      @atomsk01 8 місяців тому +1

      That Nile Green reference earned you a follow. Maybe more if I catch a stream.

  • @zsoltfox
    @zsoltfox 8 місяців тому +4

    So criminally underrated, your method for making videos is really entertaining! You get into just the right amount of detail and make the entire video feel too short and just really fun to watch. I can't wait to see your next Worst Guide video, maybe another mind-melting game like factorio somewhere down the line? :D

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      Factorio and Path of Exile are already in the works 😉
      Also, thanks for the kind words!

  • @blue_jesus9252
    @blue_jesus9252 8 місяців тому +2

    I like to think that Noita is just an ancient god's effort to gather cultist by communicating with a "modern artist" so every update is the creator recieving further instructions in his dream(he's waiting to know the use of the pot too).

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      Yeah, but the god's name is just FuryForged.

  • @mr.rabbit5642
    @mr.rabbit5642 Місяць тому +4

    I happen to look up this video and play it just to hear him say "NoËta" 1:12

  • @trip2845
    @trip2845 8 місяців тому +22

    "The learning curve is more of a learning cliff" is....yes.
    Also, "Since there's is only one way forward" was the kind of thing I told my friends when they picked up this game.
    On that note, gonna go ahead and watch all of your videos. Mwah

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +6

      Hehe, a little lying is key to selling the Noita experience.
      Also, regarding immunity, even then it's only temporary, isn't it? I wasn't sure and I didn't wanna say anything "too false" so I just left it at that.

    • @joyous18
      @joyous18 8 місяців тому +4

      Me after genociding, necromancing, and canabalizing my way to 2.55e8 seconds of poly immunity

  • @Drekromancer
    @Drekromancer 8 місяців тому +4

    Incredibly well-edited, well-written video! As a fellow Noita enjoyer, I think you boiled it all down to be very digestible and fun! Subscribed!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      I just wanna proliferate polymorphine deaths among new and returning players. Glad you enjoyed it!

  • @jocool6794
    @jocool6794 8 місяців тому +8

    Love your content, and hope to see more! but also albino called at 15:00 and wanted his joke back

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +7

      Thank you! Also I'm pretty sure I've heard a few people call wand connoisseur squidward? Maybe he started it? No intention to steal a joke, I've been calling him that for a while now lol

  • @gms02
    @gms02 8 місяців тому +2

    I hope this video gets picked up by the algorithm because it is BEAUTIFULLY MADE. Love the comedy, love the editing, pacing, explanation, familiarity with the game, etc etc etc. Your passion really shows and I hope you get what you deserve (many many views and subscribers) : )

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      Thank you so much! This one was a blast to make. I'm also finally getting comfortable with my narration voice lol

  • @Lakefruit
    @Lakefruit 8 місяців тому +2

    I’m about halfway through this video when leaving my comment. This is so insanely well edited and I love all of the references!! Subscribed :)

  • @triple3slash5
    @triple3slash5 8 місяців тому +5

    Wow you earned my sub and then some.
    The writing of this Video Essay Review Guide Educational Shitpost(?) rivals LazyPurple's "How it feels to play..." series and has a familiar vibe of max0r's videos and I promise you that is one of the biggest compliments I can give to any single piece of media on this platform.
    There's an incredible understanding of pace on display and the editing is equally as impressive because it isn't "tame", it's still wild when it fits, but there's an incredible amount of patience and restraint demonstrated throughout the whole runtime. You could have gone full montage with the game clips and the whacky shenanigans but you reigned it in and that let Noita's more intense moments shine so much brighter when you decide to demonstrate how deranged it can get.
    Splitting the video into chapters that parallel the flowchart of [Discovering Noita] and putting spoiler warnings also does a lot for people only now finding out about the game and giving them fair warnings on how deep the game goes but still keeping up the pace by not lingering on the titles and warnings.
    I could gush more, but I'm at work so I'll wrap it up.
    In general I wish more reviews are made this way in the future, whether by you or other people, because even as someone familiar with Noita, this was a joy to watch and despite treading old ground it was entertaining throughout and I never felt compelled to just wander off and watch something else.
    10/10

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Thanks you so much! I've never heard of LazyPurple, I'll check them out. I wanted to give people a chance to bounce out if they wanted to stay partly unspoiled but I think I hit on some good writing structure along the way (lying to the audience lol). I'm really happy with the pace of editing in this I've as well, I think I've found my rhythm!

    • @triple3slash5
      @triple3slash5 8 місяців тому +1

      ​@@connorconquers Looking forward to more (if you do make more), and also to catching your next stream!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      @@triple3slash5 Factorio or Path of Exile will probably be the next guide. Next steam is tonight at 8est!

  • @SylvesterAshcroft88
    @SylvesterAshcroft88 8 місяців тому +57

    Now the scary thing is...imagine this game but in 3D, and it's basically Elden Ring, but everything kills you, probably even your own weapons.

    • @Shadow6OO
      @Shadow6OO 8 місяців тому +16

      It would take SO MUCH work to pull it off, but a Noita 2 that succeeds its transition as hard as Risk of Rain 2 or Helldivers 2 would be insane.

    • @CatLover-gk8uu
      @CatLover-gk8uu 8 місяців тому +3

      I don’t even think a computer could handle that. Noita already had its freak outs with its simple graphics. Simulating every pixel on a 3D scale would be…. Insane.

    • @arcticguy3455
      @arcticguy3455 7 місяців тому

      ​@@CatLover-gk8uu bro, imagine how crazy it would be seeing the sand and snow shift as you move through it in 3d. That would be so cool and probably cause your PC to implode on itself and/or gain sentience and throttle you.

    • @laserbean00001
      @laserbean00001 7 місяців тому

      @@CatLover-gk8uu 3d pixels are called voxels. So i'm waiting for a genius developer (or just smart but dedicated) to develop a good voxel engine that is basically 3d noita.

  • @That_One_GuyMain
    @That_One_GuyMain 6 місяців тому +2

    This is one of my favorite videos I keep coming back to watch it

  • @mr_curls
    @mr_curls 5 місяців тому +2

    This makes me want to go take a tab and watch the video again and see what happens.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому

      I think the Factorio vid will be a way worse trip. Safe travels lol

  • @Coffeepanda294
    @Coffeepanda294 6 місяців тому +1

    Thank you so much for putting in an effort to make this really entertaining. There's so many super dry videos out there, good to have one that feels like it was made by a human being with emotions and humor.

  • @cakeyjunior
    @cakeyjunior 8 місяців тому +19

    Everybody eatin' when Connor Conquers drops a new video.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      That's why I always release around lunch time.

  • @anemyte7779
    @anemyte7779 8 місяців тому +6

    Damn dude. Immediately after watching this video I went to your channel to subscribe only to find that I already did. Amazing content, please make more.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      lmao well glad the feeling stayed consistent.

  • @momsaccount4033
    @momsaccount4033 5 місяців тому +10

    You removed the subway surfers gameplay during the explanation. I am now dead because of you. I am writing this comment from the afterlife. Surprisingly, the reception is pretty good.

  • @bl0ccr4fter24
    @bl0ccr4fter24 Місяць тому +2

    Aa a Swede that has visited Finland once, I can confidently say that this game was made to give non Scandinavians a small taste of Finland
    12:54 DID I HEAR A ROCK AND STONE!?!!!?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Місяць тому +1

      Between their heavy metal and their insane games I dunno what they're doing up there but oh man do I hope they continue.

  • @ZacMio
    @ZacMio 7 місяців тому +2

    18:30 not the marcille jumpscare 😭

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      You can eat the final boss, just sayin'

  • @RaticalHere
    @RaticalHere 8 місяців тому +3

    DUDE I loved your video and Albino was a big inspiration for me to make mine. My main inspiration was green x tho! Keep up the great work!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      Thanks! Yeah Albino and his editors, especially @DoodlezMusic, are amazing.

  • @karitosmc
    @karitosmc 8 місяців тому +4

    Best series available. You are on another level. Please make more.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      Thank you so much! More to come!

    • @karitosmc
      @karitosmc 8 місяців тому +2

      @@connorconquers genuinely exciting to hear. Your jokes are hilarious and I'm sure genuine Noita fans new to the channel would have been like WTF until halfway through when they realized they were watching a genius. I now have to play Noita

  • @Retr-zd7xv
    @Retr-zd7xv 5 місяців тому +3

    Me when I stumble upon a single pixel of lava

  • @AlisterCountel
    @AlisterCountel 3 місяці тому +2

    The first god run is an absolutely wild experience. I explored dozens of parallel worlds, did the sun quest, and went into NG+3 before capping it off with an 11 orb win. I had a couple more to do various achievements and feel like after 200 hours I’m finally starting to understand this game.
    Despite all of that, I haven’t even gotten close to a nightmare mode run

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 місяці тому

      Congrats!! And yeah, Nightmare Mode is... special.

  • @damienbennett2748
    @damienbennett2748 14 днів тому +1

    The way you executed that terminalmontage bit was perfect.

  • @PeskySpyCrab
    @PeskySpyCrab 5 місяців тому +3

    wasn't expecting guilty gear music in a noita video xD

  • @daemonite6661
    @daemonite6661 8 місяців тому +4

    the fact you mentioned my favorite maggot makes me happy

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      I found out about (and fell in love with) Noita because of his videos. And the Twitch integrations mod he commissioned is a gift to the community.

  • @nota2810
    @nota2810 5 місяців тому +3

    Easy tip. When spawning in, press two then click at your feet.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +1

      This is actually the secret way to manipulate your starting seed!

  • @Carlos-Karl
    @Carlos-Karl 6 місяців тому +2

    This is the best introduction to noita I ever seen 😂😂😂 Never seen a more accurate description of what is noita then what you see/hear in the beginning of this video.

  • @ranibow_sprimkles
    @ranibow_sprimkles 3 місяці тому +1

    most sane noita lore meme clip made me spit my drink out- its so long since ive seen that and it fits noita so well

  • @dr.derpington
    @dr.derpington 8 місяців тому +5

    Me: fungal shifts all the forms of poly into water

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      god gamer

    • @joyous18
      @joyous18 8 місяців тому +2

      Me: fungal shifts all forms of water into poly

  • @frostburn2982
    @frostburn2982 8 місяців тому +3

    12:55 ROCK AND STONE

  • @buttersticks7877
    @buttersticks7877 8 місяців тому +150

    as a trans person your trans juice joke was just about the greatest piece of trans rights satirical comedy relating to a video game I've ever heard. that joke alone earned you my subscription.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +89

      Y'all don't get enough jokes that are "with" and not "at", especially in the "gamer" space. I'm trying to fill that gap lol. I almost cut that one for being "too real" but fuck that state. Trans rights 🌈

    • @RezaQin
      @RezaQin 6 місяців тому +6

      Hopefully you live past 35.

    • @heymayday8761
      @heymayday8761 6 місяців тому +10

      ​@@connorconquersas another trans person, THANK YOU

    • @dianauwu1312
      @dianauwu1312 4 місяці тому +2

      It's up there with that one time playboy decided to actually be funny in the tier list of "jokes about trans people not told by the trans community about themselves"

    • @ltheroyalwe
      @ltheroyalwe 2 місяці тому +3

      Earned a dislike and channel block from me!

  • @mirshush14
    @mirshush14 8 місяців тому +1

    i stumbled upon your channel by complete accident and i just love your "worst guides". great sense of humor and amazing editing! would LOVE watching more worst guides for games i've played/ have'nt played all together!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      Glad you like them! I'm working on guides to Factorio and Path of Exile currently!

  • @Hog__Goblin
    @Hog__Goblin 8 місяців тому +2

    This channel is criminally underviewed. I'm looking forward to seeing it explode with popularity!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому

      Thanks! It'd be cool if it did but until then I'm at the whims of The Algorithm 🤖

  • @cristeimateiflorin8796
    @cristeimateiflorin8796 8 місяців тому +4

    new favorite creator acquired

  • @greedtheron8362
    @greedtheron8362 8 місяців тому +3

    Honestly I only play nightmare mode these days. For how much easier it is to die, the zero-to-overpowered route is that much faster too.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      Starting with Tinker is great but I just get Noita'd too much to stomach it.

  • @houdini8194
    @houdini8194 4 місяці тому +3

    16:11 slayyy and accurate

  • @ahmedakmal9244
    @ahmedakmal9244 7 місяців тому +1

    the spoilers getting better as you go along is amazing! I spent 220 hours until I thought I figured out everything, then there was world tp wand lmao

  • @keldwikchaldain9545
    @keldwikchaldain9545 8 місяців тому +2

    I have watched so much noita content and I had no idea that the mountain was less than a quarter of the world

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Yeah, unless you know EXACTLY what you're doing its so hard to break into the main world.

  • @goreobsessed2308
    @goreobsessed2308 8 місяців тому +5

    Made in abyss refrence woot woot

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      Was gonna show the transformation, but it just goes way too hard lmao

  • @maxedout1046
    @maxedout1046 8 місяців тому +3

    HE'S BACK!!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +1

      I never left, I'm just very slow lmao

  • @britishbeef2116
    @britishbeef2116 3 місяці тому +3

    22:01 - Don't forget RedRiotRoss

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +2

      I didn't know about them but they're on my list of people to check out!

  • @kubamz1910
    @kubamz1910 8 місяців тому +2

    Holy shit man this video just got recommended to me and ITS SO GOOD, your editing style, narration and everything is just amazing, rn i have watched all of your videos and im so confused on why you're not more popular on youtube. This is absolutely great and i'll start watching your streams from now on for sure.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +2

      Thanks! We all gotta start somewhere though, right? Streams are usually Tuesdays at 8pm EST btw.

  • @agni-kai132
    @agni-kai132 7 місяців тому +2

    Gets recommended video, hermeticism mentioned and guilty gear music on the first 5 minutes Instant subscription

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  7 місяців тому +1

      I'm gonna keep using the GGS OST but I dunno if I can fit hermeticism into every vid. I'll try just for you.

    • @agni-kai132
      @agni-kai132 7 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquers feel free to switch up the forms of mysticism if that helps!

  • @CubeClassic
    @CubeClassic 8 місяців тому +3

    This was a great video.

  • @waffleman368
    @waffleman368 7 місяців тому +3

    ok im buying it now >:(

  • @simonbrown5802
    @simonbrown5802 6 місяців тому +2

    Have played this game for 3 years, didn’t know about 90% of this shit and have never beaten it…

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 місяців тому +1

      Honestly insane how easy it is to miss most of the game and still be totally happy with your experience.

  • @Nacalal
    @Nacalal 4 місяці тому +1

    Everyone askin "what's across the lava?", but no one asking "what's under the lava".

  • @deathtoll2001
    @deathtoll2001 8 місяців тому +1

    This encapsulates my experience with the game so well! It just keeps getting crazier, bigger, more complex, and more full of WTF the deeper (and not so deeper) you go. I admit that I am not a good enough gamer to actually survive the early game very often, so I eventually gave up and backed up my save file every now and then so I could really explore... But my god did I love the exploration and tinkering!
    Even after 110 hours, I think I have like... 2 of the achievements on the pillars. XD Thanks for the excellently made video (and nostalgia)!

  • @Baphelon
    @Baphelon 7 місяців тому +3

    3:35 yea, """safe area"""

  • @zelex1456
    @zelex1456 3 місяці тому +3

    @1:13 no one can ever convince me it isn't pronounced this way

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +1

      I tried to pronounce it as many different ways as possible to cover all my bases. Finland is furious.

    • @zelex1456
      @zelex1456 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@connorconquersthey might send Steve after you, keep your tablet close man lol

  • @rs-bx9im
    @rs-bx9im 8 місяців тому +6

    The astolfo bisexual heritage month joke is so peak…. Keep cooking my man.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  8 місяців тому +4

      I'm like, "there's a very specific subset of people who will appreciate this joke and I truly hope anyone out of the loops googles it."

    • @OctyabrAprelya
      @OctyabrAprelya 3 місяці тому

      Almost choked on my tea 🤣

  • @mechahayato4988
    @mechahayato4988 2 місяці тому +1

    "You'll never be a match for poly"
    Me: *YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD STOP ME? I'M ALREADY 4 FUNGAL SHIFTS AHEAD OF YOU*

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +1

      Meanwhile, I've shifted blood and water into poly and acid respectively

  • @spidwolf5064
    @spidwolf5064 7 місяців тому +1

    Appreciate the video, I show this video to someone and then all of a sudden they have Noita! Great work!