The Worst Guide To Factorio

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  • Опубліковано 20 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,2 тис.

  • @Trupen
    @Trupen 5 місяців тому +4574

    This is a well-made guide guide to war crimes!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +339

      I learned from the best ❤️

    • @tomori8946
      @tomori8946 5 місяців тому +55

      hello factorio man. thank you for teaching us the game

    • @Colorblind77
      @Colorblind77 5 місяців тому +24

      It's The Guy

    • @Anonymous-mp2ln
      @Anonymous-mp2ln 5 місяців тому +50

      I don't remember the bugs being a signatory to the Geneva Conventions.

    • @hamzamotara4304
      @hamzamotara4304 4 місяці тому +4

      Why after you subbed to the same people as me?

  • @undercookedbeans4870
    @undercookedbeans4870 5 місяців тому +557

    'This planet is alive, and I'm going to teach it fear' thats metal af

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +40

      Thanks, just channeling my inner Dethklok 🥰

  • @milotrochez5726
    @milotrochez5726 2 місяці тому +287

    imagine the helldiver going to the factorio planet and finding all the bugs under control by one measly engineer

  • @April_johanson
    @April_johanson 5 місяців тому +367

    17:17 “SIZE DOES MATTER AND ANYBODY WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE IS A BOTTOM
    AND IM ALWAYS ON TOP OF MY GAME”
    Got me so good omg 😂

    • @abcedefger4251
      @abcedefger4251 5 місяців тому +25

      ...i-i'm a bottom~ 👀👉👈

    • @mikeydflyingtoaster
      @mikeydflyingtoaster 4 місяці тому +22

      Hang on, wouldn’t a bottom have far more knowledge and experience, being the one most directly affected by the size or lack thereof?

    • @abcedefger4251
      @abcedefger4251 4 місяці тому +14

      @@mikeydflyingtoaster exactly! =w=
      aaaaaaaand also it sounds more like
      "RAIN IS WET AND ANYBODY WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE IS AN UMBRELLA"
      like
      if you are an umbrella
      why in the name of king ludwig the fourteenth's colored striped trousers would you even consider making such a ridiculous counterclaim
      when your entire life experience is telling you the exact opposite of dat
      it just makes no sense. it makes no sense at all. =w=

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +43

      @@abcedefger4251 That's a lot of joke criticsim coming from someone within topping distance.

    • @paulv8773
      @paulv8773 4 місяці тому +1

      I'm pretty sure all the size queens are bottoms so I don't think this quite tracks.

  • @zegreatpumpkinani9161
    @zegreatpumpkinani9161 4 місяці тому +74

    Well you see, as a train person, I never crash into an underground pipe full speed holding W after a... diplomatic expedition, and suddenly wonder why I have no plastic production

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +14

      Damn that's so real, I hate it lol.

    • @jeremylakeman
      @jeremylakeman 3 місяці тому +1

      I only explore by building rail, with radar at the end. Why drive around every rock multiple times when you can just build it once and travel back even faster.

  • @marvinmetellus7919
    @marvinmetellus7919 5 місяців тому +2851

    At least oxygen is included this time around

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +280

      Right? Easy game for babies.

    • @emdeo
      @emdeo 5 місяців тому +80

      don't start Space Exploration. don't start Space Exploration. don't

    • @sypeiterra7613
      @sypeiterra7613 5 місяців тому +18

      Try Pyanadons! Or bobs+angels if you're not too insane

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +85

      RE: Space Exploration... notice how I never touched on multiplayer here? Part 2 isn't out of the question.......

    • @Mr.Sparks.173
      @Mr.Sparks.173 5 місяців тому +11

      ​@@sypeiterra7613 don't kill the poor man! Even factorio veterans are afraid of Py

  • @AKidWithNoAttitude
    @AKidWithNoAttitude 5 місяців тому +1286

    You went from Minecraft, to Frostpunk, to Starship Troopers, to I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +168

      I literally based that segment on the last paragraph on IHNMAIMS 🤣

    • @bitflip2
      @bitflip2 Місяць тому +2

      This video is a masterpiece

  • @bobroberto95
    @bobroberto95 5 місяців тому +738

    "should you play the tutorial? yes. Will it teach you the basics of the game? also yes. will it teach you well? no, that's what trupen is for"
    best line

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +86

      It's not even a joke, it's just a straight up fact lol

    • @Taeolas
      @Taeolas 4 місяці тому +10

      For me it was Nilaus. I was intrigued by the game, got it for Christmas break, tried the Tutorial and couldn't figure out a damn thing. Found Nilaus via DSP, he taught me how to play Factorio and I'm now on an SEK2 run.

  • @Zeus.2459
    @Zeus.2459 3 місяці тому +60

    3:47 "Thermodynamics can suck it"
    Yeah, that's how fuel tends to work...

  • @Coffeepanda294
    @Coffeepanda294 3 місяці тому +72

    The part about the resources being yours reminds me of that joke in Subnautica where your PDA tells you that you must reimburse the corporation that owns the planet you're stranded on for all the resources you consume. "Your current balance stands at 5 million galactic credits"

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 місяці тому +29

      The "just trying to survive" to "I am the megacorp" pipeline in this game is insane.

  • @veryoldpotato
    @veryoldpotato 5 місяців тому +1759

    Sometimes I wonder what Dosh Doshington would be capable of if Factorio didn't exist.
    I think the world is safer this way.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +307

      P = NP would be solved by now

    • @lis6502
      @lis6502 5 місяців тому +63

      so i wasn't the only one:D Remember that besides Factorio Dosh has his Zachtronics games, to keep him under control in alternate factorioless universe simply spew more Zachtronics to properly cool his core ^^

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 місяців тому +50

      Factorio was created to contain Dosh. A traveler from an alternate reality came to our world and made it purely to circumvent the disaster that fell upon his existence.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +8

      @@connorconquers Nah, he'd look at NP and just be like No Problem, P you are the Problem.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +1

      @@lis6502 Zachtronics are decent, but Turing Complete isn't bad either. I have Hard Chip on my waiting list.

  • @Silveryard
    @Silveryard 5 місяців тому +947

    As a German I almost smiled at that joke 1:18 hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +251

      An almost smile from a German is a huge compliment. Thank you!

    • @CaptainTimo
      @CaptainTimo 5 місяців тому +14

      I don't understand that joke, could you explain it to me ?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +141

      @@CaptainTimo Germans have historically been a very industrious and productive people. A lot of great engineers also come from Germany. So I'm associating the German peoples with the Factorio engineer who is a seemingly magic beacon of productivity and efficiency.
      Also, German's are culturally a stoic people (not always but culture is culture) so me saying an almost smile is huge is poking fun at that stoic-ness.
      This is all said with a mix jest and respect, of course.

    • @liheg
      @liheg 5 місяців тому +23

      ​@@connorconquers very industrious and productive indeed. Just the reason, why my 3 months of final exam prep time went right into "JUST BUILD MOOORE" and "THE FACTORY MUST GROOOOOOOOWWWWWW" plus like 4 days of actual doing school stuff. Still passed by quite the long shot. In University by now. And... how can i put that lightly. And FURTHER EXPANDING THE FACTORY 😈😈😈

    • @joelhummel8923
      @joelhummel8923 5 місяців тому +21

      As a (currently drunk) german I can say that tought the power of beer i slightly smiled

  • @SketchAndEtch
    @SketchAndEtch 5 місяців тому +319

    This is one of the best Factorio adverts that I've seen and it's not even subtle.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +69

      I really missed my calling as a drug dealer

    • @SketchAndEtch
      @SketchAndEtch 5 місяців тому +52

      @@connorconquers "Hey!...psst! Hey kid!...wanna build a factory? First warcrime is free"

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +2

      @@SketchAndEtch LMAO!!!

    • @Momi_V
      @Momi_V 3 місяці тому +3

      ​@@SketchAndEtchIf you never stop the genocide it technically only counts as one Warcrime

  • @dagamarvanderkoft3784
    @dagamarvanderkoft3784 4 місяці тому +77

    The use of the FTL soundtrack in the background has absolutely flabbergasted my entire brain

  • @bilskirnir_
    @bilskirnir_ Місяць тому +24

    "I joined the fight against climate change. On the side of pollution."

  • @hrac88
    @hrac88 5 місяців тому +467

    3 minutes into the video and you deconstructed the space ship
    prepare to be sacrificed to elder gods

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +140

      I have fled the solar system. My crimes will go unpunished.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 місяців тому +17

      ​@@connorconquersthe Biters will bring justice

    • @lis6502
      @lis6502 5 місяців тому +8

      Leave him to be sacrificed to the Behemoths ;P aaand enjoy his content until then ^^

  • @davethefoxmage5797
    @davethefoxmage5797 5 місяців тому +489

    So, as someone with several thousand hours in Factorio... yeah - this is the Factorio experience in a nutshell. Like I can't even call this an exaggeration. Even the megalomaniacal part toward the end.
    ...
    Now, if you'll excuse me, the factory must grow!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +41

      The villain arc is only a very slight exaggeration.

    • @Mr.Sparks.173
      @Mr.Sparks.173 4 місяці тому +10

      There's only one non megalomaniac ending, and that's if you play without biters. Then the ending is just replacing all that ugly green nature stuff with beautiful and wholesome concrete.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +5

      Yeah, and corporations with hundreds to even thousands of engineers and millions or even billions of dollars in revenue and cash flow still can't keep up with our demands. The factory must grow, and we still need the hardware 5 generations from now, right now!

    • @voidshattered
      @voidshattered 3 місяці тому +1

      If... of you need a more chill experience... try satisfactory

  • @Co60-Ni60
    @Co60-Ni60 5 місяців тому +231

    Every so often I accidentally hit the alt key and wander around my factory wondering why I can’t see

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +29

      THIS HAPPENED SO MANY TIMES

    • @quaker5712
      @quaker5712 5 місяців тому +4

      Alt-D failed me again!!!

    • @shadefangkweep
      @shadefangkweep 3 місяці тому +2

      This is why I have that rebound to semicolon
      hit that accidentally far less often.

    • @SukacitaYeremia
      @SukacitaYeremia 3 місяці тому +2

      I missed the word "accidentally" reading this and thought you were like those shortsighted guys who took off their glasses as a pastime

  • @kris220b
    @kris220b 4 місяці тому +8

    for trains you basically only need to know:
    1, keep signals and trains on the same side/same direction ( you will need 2 lengths of tracks for a one way system )
    2, anytime there is a start of a split or merger in the tracks, add chain signal(s)
    3, anytime there is the end of a split or merger add normal signal(s)

  • @LifeofBoris
    @LifeofBoris 2 місяці тому +23

    yes

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +6

      Well this is kinda surreal. Thanks for all the great videos. You're a massive inspiration for my cooking and editing. Stay safe out there Slav King 👑

    • @Fannigum
      @Fannigum 2 місяці тому +1

      this comment is the pinnacle of writing, symbolizes the agreement to the better opinion🔥

  • @ThatOliveMrT
    @ThatOliveMrT 5 місяців тому +359

    'Ratios are important'
    My cursed production line that uses tier 3 prods so it's never truly raito'd; 🗿

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +64

      Most of my builds were, "it works, moving on" lol

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 місяців тому +10

      if you got the ratio’s correct BEFORE you added modules then if you added the same modules to every machine in the production line then the ratio never actually changed :)

    • @NotaWalrus1
      @NotaWalrus1 5 місяців тому +9

      @@HexenMeister06 Nope. Ratio for circuits before modules is 3:2 and after modules it's close to 1:1, for instance.

    • @Dawnchaser0
      @Dawnchaser0 4 місяці тому +9

      @@HexenMeister06 This applies for speed, but not productivity, They make alll the rations just broken

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +5

      Don't tell that to Josh. Let's game it out would make a mess of your ratios and still find a way to get it to work.

  • @samkerski
    @samkerski 5 місяців тому +488

    Hello, train fiend. We're so glad you could join us. Welcome home.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +179

      That bit is based on my actual early thoughts on trains. I have seen the light. I submit to train supremacy

    • @BirbTwig
      @BirbTwig 5 місяців тому +22

      @@connorconquers Yes, good, we gather another follower.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +5

      @@connorconquers And that's why I truly like Satisfactory as much as this game!

    • @fouadatwi4842
      @fouadatwi4842 4 місяці тому +3

      i like trains

    • @gugre1713
      @gugre1713 4 місяці тому +8

      There aren‘t many things better than factorio trains. Not even drugs compare

  • @BloodyMobile
    @BloodyMobile 5 місяців тому +120

    Factorio, one of the few legal versions of crack.
    "Will it teach you well? No, that is what Trupen is for" 🤣
    "You're now addicted." - "Inside you are two wolves. One smokes concrete. The other also smokes concrete. You're addicted to concrete."
    And now I want this but for Space Exploration and Krastorio 2. Just because the Factory must grow! Why stop at /one/ planet?
    I also feel like the 19:00 is the prelude to Helldivers 2...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +16

      Accidental Helldivers lore??? This is the planet the terminids started on 💀💀💀

    • @TheNevar18
      @TheNevar18 5 місяців тому +4

      @@connorconquers Considering the bugs used to drop Alien Science, this isn't far off...

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 місяців тому +2

      For Democracy!

    • @SukacitaYeremia
      @SukacitaYeremia 3 місяці тому +2

      @@connorconquers Helldivers? yea sure. What about accidental factorio lore though? Like, the respawn mechanism? Are you like doctor whos that reanimates themselves as a different self while still being the same character but retaining the memories of your past manifestations? Does that impair your memories of who you were and where you came from before? Who granted you that power? Is it the same thing that caused your ship to crash?

    • @gratuitouslurking8610
      @gratuitouslurking8610 3 місяці тому +2

      The ironic part is the 'why stop at one planet' is exactly what the main Factorio devs are working on too.

  • @5Davideo
    @5Davideo 8 днів тому +4

    Says it's the worst guide, actually pretty reasonable.
    Also re: that particular rant at the imprisoned biter nest: in the new expansion, you can enslave them and put them to work *in* your factory.

  • @VerticalBaconSandWch
    @VerticalBaconSandWch 3 місяці тому +15

    the fucking quality of this video; the editing, the writing, the narration, choice of score, fucking everything made me assume this channel had at least 10 million subs. Extremely underrated creator. You've earned my sub.

  • @HexenMeister06
    @HexenMeister06 5 місяців тому +64

    pro tip: every ratio is just the crafting times, with the ingredients’ multiplied by the amount required by the product.
    example:
    a green circuit requires 3 copper coils, both take 0.5 seconds to craft, multiply 0.5 by 3 you get 1.5, the ratio of green circuits to copper coils is 1:1.5, since you cant build half an assembly machine you round up to 2:3
    red science requires one iron gear and one copper plate, you get the copper plate from smelting but iron gears you need to craft via assembly machine, iron gears take 0.5 seconds but red science takes 5 seconds, so ONE iron gear assembly machine will meet the demand of TEN red science assembly machines.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +15

      I'm tempted to pin this incase my subpar explanation scared anyone off lol

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 місяців тому +7

      @@connorconquers took me 400 hours till i figured this one trick out and ive never seen anyone mention it anywhere else. most youtubers just say “once you get the ratios down” and don’t elaborate. this trick also is a life savor for mods like space exploration.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 місяців тому +2

      mother of god

    • @HexenMeister06
      @HexenMeister06 5 місяців тому +2

      i feel like i poorly explained this trick and have edited it accordingly. looking back i found holes in the math and should point them out. originally i forgot to mention _how_ to multiply the crafting times, hope its more clear.

    • @fabienherry6690
      @fabienherry6690 5 місяців тому +5

      Productivity module : allow me to introduce myself !

  • @TheKirby117
    @TheKirby117 5 місяців тому +86

    watched up to "and to do this we're going to become more obsessed with belts than an anime protagonist, so that we can accomplish more insertions than a sounding enthusiast" and knew you were the one; brilliant writing (thus far; don't let me down from here)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +24

      That's by far the most cursed sentence I've ever constructed. Hope you liked the rest of the vid!

    • @christoefur944
      @christoefur944 5 місяців тому +15

      ​@@connorconquers more cursed than "inflate harder than a furry trying to make rent"?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +6

      @@christoefur944 A close second lol

    • @9clawtiger
      @9clawtiger 5 місяців тому +5

      I learned a new word today.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +6

      Hah, I'm so sorry.

  • @rubyeyed756
    @rubyeyed756 5 місяців тому +99

    That slander against walling, UNCALLED FOR. I like fortresses and so should everyone else.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +18

      Well tbf I did wall in my entire base before I learned my lesson lol

    • @an_asp
      @an_asp 5 місяців тому +11

      I feel like walling in your base becomes much better once you have construction robots and blueprints, so you can easily pick up your wall and move it somewhere else for expansion. Tileable blueprints can be especially nice.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +9

      Oh 100%. Having to take them down manually is brutal.

    • @sea_kerman
      @sea_kerman 5 місяців тому +3

      @@connorconquersthe true answer is to make your wall huge to start out with.

    • @leobastian_
      @leobastian_ 5 місяців тому +1

      They arent very functional but by good are they nice to look at

  • @Tinyuvm
    @Tinyuvm 5 місяців тому +58

    "Nothing is so permanent as a Starter base", Milton Friedman

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +8

      ooft, right in the truth

    • @Mirekluk
      @Mirekluk 4 місяці тому +4

      ​@@connorconquersthe atarter base experience " i will keep you so I can expand more easily, but not make dedicated new and sexy base with your produce"

    • @victorcaldera249
      @victorcaldera249 3 місяці тому +2

      If it doesn’t have concrete and lamps its not a real base its a starter base - Doshdoshington

  • @Th3_W01f
    @Th3_W01f 3 місяці тому +13

    One of the fun parts about Seablock is when you finish the game winning research, it gives you a question "Wanna do it again? With two options "Hell yeah" and "No I want my mommy" which is rather appropriate.

  • @unhappyllamaz
    @unhappyllamaz 5 місяців тому +145

    It's wild that endgame bases kinda look like circuit boards.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +51

      That seems to happen with every factory game after a while

    • @jooot_6850
      @jooot_6850 5 місяців тому +22

      It's all input-outputs with a slightly different flavor applied to it.

    • @skilz8098
      @skilz8098 4 місяці тому +7

      And then there is this: ua-cam.com/video/Y9xi0V71G08/v-deo.html so not every factory game or playthrough results in looking like a circuit board.

    • @ax14pz107
      @ax14pz107 29 днів тому +1

      All hail the mighty gradient. Time is flow, flow is change, change is existence.

    • @pallarandersvisa1906
      @pallarandersvisa1906 21 день тому

      Mine didn't - for the first time. Didn't watch any tutorials, didn't build main bus, it was all spaghetti and I launched the rocket :)

  • @celem12
    @celem12 5 місяців тому +118

    HBomberGuy Flashbang

  • @josevictor6133
    @josevictor6133 5 місяців тому +57

    Factorio: A game where automation meets "I have no mouth and I must scream"

  • @Issenthevampire
    @Issenthevampire 4 місяці тому +12

    "This planet is alive and I'm going to teach it fear" Goes SO fucking hard.
    That train bit was incredible as well.

  • @AaronC.
    @AaronC. 4 місяці тому +33

    List of games that I'd love to see guides for:
    Rimworld.
    Mindustry.
    Project Zomboid.
    Terraria.
    Vintage Story.
    Love the content!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +20

      @@AaronC. I do love Terraria and I've thought about making a guide for it before. Glad to know there is interest!

    • @VayaKahvi
      @VayaKahvi 3 місяці тому +3

      I second that call for Rimworld!

    • @Superboy-jx3zv
      @Superboy-jx3zv 2 місяці тому +1

      I also recommend Cities Skylines, Transport Fever 2 and Workers and Recources Soviet Republic, because notings more fun than to see a 80% population alcohol addiction

    • @m4rcyonstation93
      @m4rcyonstation93 2 місяці тому +3

      rimworld is peak

  • @umbra4540
    @umbra4540 5 місяців тому +166

    "anyone who tells you otherwise is a bottom" au contraire, my friend. have you never heard of a size queen?

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +40

      😳

    • @Xeridanus
      @Xeridanus 4 місяці тому +1

      They're not going to tell you that size doesn't matter though.

  • @nightbot6415
    @nightbot6415 5 місяців тому +56

    21:02 The fact that you have catagorized some games in the folder uncatagorized made me burst out laughing.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +26

      In case you're curious, it contains: TES IV (Oblivion), Factorio, Helldivers 2, Magicraft, OTXO, Ravenswatch, Rollercoaster Tycoon Delux, Super Hexagon, Terraria, and Vtuber Studio.
      I have no idea why I've done this.

    • @123890antonioj
      @123890antonioj 2 місяці тому +3

      ​@@connorconquers Clearly you suffer from an envious diversity of games to the point of putting Factorio and Terraria in the same 'misc' bin lmao

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +2

      @@123890antonioj well I've been in the game industry for a while now and I'm kinda passionate about it lol 😅

  • @Wrulfy
    @Wrulfy 5 місяців тому +2661

    "I learned Lua out of spite and made a mod to be gay and select pronouns" thats just brilliant

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +501

      This is what happens when I'm left alone with Visual Studio

    • @LordsSky
      @LordsSky 5 місяців тому +63

      Absolutely legendary.

    • @Hawk7886
      @Hawk7886 5 місяців тому +109

      Mega based

    • @MediaMunkee
      @MediaMunkee 5 місяців тому +45

      Infinitely more effective than parroting "hit that subscribe button".

    • @RoamingAdhocrat
      @RoamingAdhocrat 5 місяців тому +173

      in my experience, being fuelled by spite is the only way to get anything done in Lua

  • @bucket236
    @bucket236 2 місяці тому +10

    15:44 This is the hardest "The Factory Must GROW" I've ever heard

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому +6

      I had to record that part in my car in the middle of nowhere cuz I didn't want to yell in my apartment 😅

    • @bucket236
      @bucket236 2 місяці тому +3

      @@connorconquers I'm just imagining someone seeing you yell out "THE FACTORY MUST GROW" into the microphone and wondering "What the hell is this guy doing?" This must've looked hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Місяць тому +1

      Oh I did the full monologue in there. And I took video of it cuz I knew I looked insane. It'll probably be in the "year in review" video lol

    • @TheToric
      @TheToric Місяць тому

      ​@@connorconquersmaster boot record/keygen church was an excellent choice for this bit.

    • @ThomasWinget
      @ThomasWinget 12 днів тому

      @@connorconquers Hello from November, looking forward to this. Also Space Age exists now...

  • @Liam-fd4uh
    @Liam-fd4uh 11 днів тому +3

    "This planet is alive and I'm going to teach it fear" is genuinely one of the hardest quotes I've ever heard holy shit

  • @tiberiusstaicu7853
    @tiberiusstaicu7853 5 місяців тому +15

    ambiguous amphibian led me down a dark path , the factorio pipeline , its mostly an underground pipeline with many others intersecting it .

  • @mustakragen6103
    @mustakragen6103 5 місяців тому +90

    Ah, heavy drugs advertised in a plain sight, love it!

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +16

      I feel like I missed my calling as a drug dealer

  • @thehansboi
    @thehansboi 5 місяців тому +7

    oh my god i love how it went from simple beginnings to chaotic scaling, it's funny how this is both informational and insanity, amazing video.
    makes me wanna play the game myself but it doesn't have the same addictive effect to me like others experienced, that rock and stone game on the other hand...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      Glad you liked it! I need to get back on DRG. Helldivers 2 got me hooked tho.

  • @michaelmedvedskiy7449
    @michaelmedvedskiy7449 3 місяці тому +7

    The performance on 15:20 is very expressive, translates the desire to own this world colourfully, loved it

    • @michaelmedvedskiy7449
      @michaelmedvedskiy7449 3 місяці тому +2

      Re-listening it over an over, it’s mine, this masterpiece is mine!!

  • @GreaterD
    @GreaterD 4 місяці тому +10

    There is no better feeling then remembering that you have a hundreds of kilometres long wall lined with autoreloading artillery , a tool to tell them where to shoot, and a target rich environment

  • @ImNedA12
    @ImNedA12 5 місяців тому +65

    oh my god a huniepop video would actually be hilarious

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +30

      I have a script started for it 👀

    • @jcj94brony
      @jcj94brony 5 місяців тому +7

      ​@@connorconquers Do. It.

    • @taroasukai2840
      @taroasukai2840 3 місяці тому +1

      @@connorconquers OMG please do it!!

  • @VoiceOfDistortion
    @VoiceOfDistortion 5 місяців тому +147

    PROJECT MOON MENTIONED

    • @MrBurningGarbage
      @MrBurningGarbage 5 місяців тому +16

      worst guide to lobotomy corporation when

    • @pavoazul4439
      @pavoazul4439 5 місяців тому +9

      The voices are getting louder

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +38

      It's on my radar 👀

    • @KasseCoronet6556
      @KasseCoronet6556 5 місяців тому +5

      @@connorconquers I'll be genuinely impressed if you can manage to get good at those games. Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina is like if a management sim and a card battler had the depth and difficulty of a Zachtronics game.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +10

      @@KasseCoronet6556 Okay that sounds like exactly my shit. Also, when has being good at a game ever been a requirement for me making a video about it 😉

  • @gingerbread2771
    @gingerbread2771 5 місяців тому +23

    The train switcheroo was a masterpiece and it somehow only got better afterwards. I kinda wish you included a segment about some of the batshit mods like pyanodons and SE but I can see why you didn't. Great video mate, can't wait to see this channel explode into the stratosphere.

    • @Robplayswithdragons
      @Robplayswithdragons 3 місяці тому

      in the list where we showed a few mods, py was a few down.. so he may have at least tried it for funzies lol

  • @PendragonDaGreat
    @PendragonDaGreat 5 місяців тому +6

    Your inability to not laugh at "Get in the robot Engi" is part of why I love this series so much.

  • @olafboer3435
    @olafboer3435 4 місяці тому +5

    15:34 is just- beautiful. I was wondering where our catchphrase had been before then. Glad that you've seen the truth. Welcome to the factory

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому

      Had to give it the gravity it deserved. But wait... if we're here... who's growing our factories???

    • @olafboer3435
      @olafboer3435 4 місяці тому +1

      @@connorconquers oh I'm playing Factorio while typing :] it was very cathardic to hear you take up our warcry. I keep replaying it

  • @yuraneroba66
    @yuraneroba66 5 місяців тому +22

    0:43 - it's Kyiv Polytechnic Institute, I used to study there, lol ;)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +5

      Hah, I just used some random stock video for that. I love when stuff like this gets spotted.

    • @jenko_kov
      @jenko_kov 12 днів тому

      Basically our Ukrainian place to teach new cracked people and prep them to be VERY EFFICIENT in their factories

  • @AnYEntertainment
    @AnYEntertainment 5 місяців тому +8

    Average German here - can confirm: Eating and drinking is optional for us, but we do it anyways, because we really like beer
    Looking forward to grading your homework - I have... 'studied' the subject matter myself plenty...
    Looking forward to whatever comes next!

  • @chronicnightmare.
    @chronicnightmare. 5 місяців тому +20

    that ending is a nice reference of I have no mouth and i must scream, but this time you are AM.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +4

      I'm so happy so many people are getting the reference considering how much I curbed from the last paragraph of that story lol

  • @Zeratultheking
    @Zeratultheking 4 місяці тому +3

    You managed to capture the entire factorio arc in 20 min. Well done! Definitely going to check out more of your stuff as this is extremely well made!

  • @Cepuminator
    @Cepuminator 4 місяці тому +8

    Was not expecting Keygen Church, but man, does it work so well.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +6

      I pretty much came up with that segment and scripted the video around it lol

  • @hillybanson
    @hillybanson 5 місяців тому +10

    I came for the factorio video. I stayed for the 'I have no mouth and I must scream' prequel that it became.

  • @COWHATE
    @COWHATE 27 днів тому +4

    17:25 "Get in the robot Engi" is perfect

  • @vbcoder42
    @vbcoder42 2 місяці тому +5

    started with your noita vid (despite having hundreds of hours, the title got me) and immediately binged the rest of your channel.
    spot on humor and pretty infromative. very cool that you link other channels too, also good taste in music lol.
    keep it up 👍

  • @Audey
    @Audey 4 місяці тому +7

    As a long time factorio player, this is a piece of art that speaks an ineffable "WHAT AM FACTORIO?" into existence. And while it may not teach a new player how to to play the game, it baptizes them in the everlasting and unspeakable waters of THE RATIO. For whatsoever passes, one thing is known: The Factory. Must. Grow.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +2

      That's kinda what I go for with all my "guides"
      It's more, "you should play this game and here's some stuff you should know and how to get started." Basically an ad with extra steps lol

  • @affanalam6123
    @affanalam6123 5 місяців тому +15

    Thank you Connor, now I can start my 173rd playthrough of the game.

  • @zacharys8141
    @zacharys8141 2 місяці тому +4

    “It’s just my starter base” has got to be my favorite excuse for any horrendous design

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  2 місяці тому

      I can justify so many design crimes with this

  • @lis6502
    @lis6502 5 місяців тому +4

    as a seasoned player i really approve this guide. I've seen Trupen's films being way worser than this xD. In all seriousness you've covered everything to reflect what this game is. Ratios are especially neglected by authors of "how i built my starter base in 100hrs". A+ my friend

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      Thank you! I always try to capture that essence that makes a game special and this was a hard one because there's SO MUCH. Figuring out what NOT to cover was so damn tough.

  • @Deneb626
    @Deneb626 5 місяців тому +5

    The first thing I notice is First Trumpet in the background.
    I am now morally obliged to keep watching.

  • @dogwithswag
    @dogwithswag 5 місяців тому +2

    Man this was an amazing video, well edited, funny and engaging. Really surprised at the level of quality on display here, keep up the good work.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +1

      Thanks! I'm learning more with each one!

  • @PoisoNico93
    @PoisoNico93 5 місяців тому +12

    Did not expect to hear the word sounding in a Factorio video but it got a chuckle from me

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      One day I will be punished for my sins.

    • @PoisoNico93
      @PoisoNico93 5 місяців тому +1

      @@connorconquers Oh and thank you for linking your music choices in the description. I had forgotten the OTXO OST exists

  • @liveen
    @liveen 5 місяців тому +5

    From 14:50 up to 15:53 I ended up realizing I'm watching the same dude who convinced me to try Noita. Holy shit that feeling

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      "Oh shit its the time-sink game guy! I gotta get outta here!"

  • @wollwolke
    @wollwolke 5 місяців тому +3

    This really encapsulates the classic descent into madness in Factorio. Especially the use of Keygen Church at 15:27 works so well, I love it

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      I was so afraid it wasn't gonna work. So happy it seems to have!

    • @leakingamps2050
      @leakingamps2050 2 місяці тому

      which song was this?

    • @raizors1331
      @raizors1331 9 днів тому

      ​@@leakingamps2050
      Tenebre Rosso Sangue - KEYGEN CHURCH
      Or, if you are an Ultrakill player, it's "The epic song that plays when you are about to get absolutely humbled"

  • @JayDayKay
    @JayDayKay Місяць тому +2

    8:51 wasn’t all too convinced until I watched you place down like 6 turrets directly in front of enemies and just manually load them up with ammunition to spit out in .5 seconds. I think I should play factorio

  • @sorbpen
    @sorbpen Місяць тому +1

    "I'm simply here to tickle your neurons and lure you into a life ruining addiction" - style videos are what this game needs.
    And you did a great job, got me to put this on my to play-list, after i finish satisfactory.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  Місяць тому

      I can't wait to get into Satisfactory. Will probably do a guide on it sometime next year.

  • @MakroneFaun
    @MakroneFaun 4 місяці тому +5

    Not a single day has gone by where I don't see one of my fellow Germans building a gigantic factory.

  • @SephirothsBIade
    @SephirothsBIade 5 місяців тому +4

    6:12 Most accurate description of channel yet.
    It works... I now understand more about Finnish alchemy than I ever expected to learn.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      I'm secretly an eldritch entity that consumes people's productivity 🥰

  • @MarcoTross-dz7rh
    @MarcoTross-dz7rh 5 місяців тому +5

    The lobotomy corporation os5 goes unbelievably hard (incredible video as always)

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +2

      I really should play that game. And thanks!

  • @SukacitaYeremia
    @SukacitaYeremia 3 місяці тому +1

    This guy could script and publish a video around Zisteau cursing Factorio's autosave, and through sheer shock and awe cause youtube to triple in company profits over a fortnight.
    Spectacular video! You're incredibly lucky and absolutely the perfect person to have made this video at this space and time.
    I'm sorry that it'll all be downhill from now on though.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 місяці тому

      Lol thanks. I've got some big plans still so let's hope it's not downhill lol

  • @vladspellbinder
    @vladspellbinder 3 місяці тому +2

    So, some funny jokes throughout but the one at 15:56 made me literally laugh out loud so thanks for that.
    I've sort of bounced on the tutorial of all things. I don't know what it is, I want to get sucked into this game but don't while Satisfactory didn't let me go for over a year.
    Thanks for the video.

  • @christopherschneider2968
    @christopherschneider2968 5 місяців тому +6

    That point about programming is something another video i saw made, so i knew were you going with that. I finished Factorio multiple times before i saw my first tutorial video. Boy i did so much wrong! Thats also the difference between self thought programming and properly thought programming...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +3

      I'm a university educated software engineer and professional AAA game dev. I'm still bad at programming 💀

    • @christopherschneider2968
      @christopherschneider2968 5 місяців тому +2

      @@connorconquers My experience with python 3 are CodeCombat and the "Yet Another Roguelike Tutorial - Written in Python 3 and TCOD" were are not the same! Jokes aside i love your videos, as you said you are a game dev and your vids are the best reviews hands down. Professional standpoint, peak humor and not being a right wing douchebag are the reason i unsubscribed from other reviewers.

  • @LiIBeary
    @LiIBeary 5 місяців тому +12

    Ayo, its time for my favorite series
    The Worst Guides by Connor Conquers!

  • @Chounoo
    @Chounoo 5 місяців тому +9

    I love your narrative style. It really feels like how you would approach a game for the first time and improve on each iteration. Thanks for the new addiction

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +4

      That's actually exactly how I approached this video. All the other ones were games I already had a ton of experience with. After the Noita video I realised how much better a narrative through line makes things. So since I had less experience with this game I tried to lean on the first time learning experience more and build on that. I wasn't sure if it worked well but it seems to be going well!

    • @Chounoo
      @Chounoo 5 місяців тому

      @@connorconquers It definitely makes the videos entertaining to watch and makes me want to play the games. Wish you all the success, you definitely deserve it

  • @zonolith5912
    @zonolith5912 12 днів тому +1

    "The Factory MUST GROW"
    Unironically a hardcore battle cry.

  • @ja3802
    @ja3802 17 днів тому +1

    A wonderful, inspirational story about a man learning to overcome his trainsphobia, 10/10

  • @shubhan2002
    @shubhan2002 2 місяці тому +4

    "After the successful crash hit alt"
    Oh man i realised how big of a deal it was when I reached mission 5 😂

  • @Colorblind77
    @Colorblind77 5 місяців тому +4

    Also Connor, you're awesome and keep up the good content, I'm willing to wait

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      Awww thanks. I'm slow with these scripts but I'm glad people think they are worth it

  • @maxmasher2597
    @maxmasher2597 5 місяців тому +11

    Conveyor belts, nukes, and an unhealthy amount of optimization? I think I should play factorio

  • @adamh1228
    @adamh1228 13 днів тому +2

    "what if i just build one train" right into a fugue state.. totally relatable

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  13 днів тому +1

      The rate at which I actually went from "trains are dumb" to "how can I build my entire base around these divine creations" was startling even to me.

    • @adamh1228
      @adamh1228 13 днів тому

      @@connorconquers i probably played my first 1000 hrs without making trains, and now its the first thing i shoot for. now when i play multiplayer with my brother, we just text each other "TRAINS?"

  • @miss_bec
    @miss_bec 3 місяці тому +1

    Hey memes aside this video is god damn amazing. The pacing is perfect, the editing is perfect, the jokes are fucking great. It's like a Maxor video but i have functional retinas by the end.

  • @Haidex_
    @Haidex_ 5 місяців тому +4

    this is literally the "sell seashells on a seashore" meme luigi sings but the guide for factorio awesome

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      I've created biter scarcity. Buy now...

  • @shlrup6154
    @shlrup6154 5 місяців тому +20

    i literally said "oh yes" under my breath when i saw the notification

  • @tarrker
    @tarrker 4 місяці тому +3

    Factorio is one of those games that is what you make of it. It's only complicated if you make it complicated.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому +1

      It's a 'lil complicated. But yeah, I like to overcomplicate things lol

  • @MarcusDolby
    @MarcusDolby 19 годин тому +1

    This video has two of my favorite things: Factorio and war crimes

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  10 годин тому

      I can't wait to do so much worse to the biters in the DLC.

  • @loveisinportant5570
    @loveisinportant5570 4 місяці тому +1

    Genuinely one of the best UA-cam videos I've seen in a long while. The title and premise don't do it justice, this was truly a journey to behold. Fantastic work. I know what video to go to when recommending Factorio henceforth.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  4 місяці тому

      Thanks! Glad you liked it. Good luck getting other into this fantastic life-ruining addiction!

  • @droz74
    @droz74 3 місяці тому +3

    Opening the video with a "Warning" from Lob Corp... well I know what guide I'm getting into here...

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 місяці тому +1

      I just liked the song lol. I had no idea the PTSD storm I was unleashing. And now I own the game as a result 👀

  • @fremenondesand3896
    @fremenondesand3896 22 дні тому +6

    Kovarex is a pretty normal guy. I like him.
    Factorio is a lot of fun.

  • @gypseetim
    @gypseetim 5 місяців тому +6

    you forgot to mention speedrun masters AntiElitz and Nefrums
    great video :D

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +7

      I'm trying to trick people into playing, not scare them away with peak gameplay. The un-factorio'ed mind can't handle that out the gate.

  • @BlindSpectet
    @BlindSpectet Місяць тому +1

    These videos are genius! you watch them for the first time and buy the game, then after playing the game for an unhealthy sum of time you watch it again and it’s even funnier

  • @tylerdelange5959
    @tylerdelange5959 17 днів тому +1

    Music going from FTL->Darktide->Ultrakill->OTXO->Doom was not expected, but damn you've got good taste

  • @wygiwyg
    @wygiwyg 5 місяців тому +4

    i discovered your channel today and watched all videos, please keep up the work. Love it

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому

      Thank! Glad you're enjoying. I think I'm doing Path of Exile next.

  • @digiholic
    @digiholic 5 місяців тому +10

    Man this guy just consistently keeps posting exactly my taste in games. I feel like we'd be good friends.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  5 місяців тому +6

      I just like games that are spreadsheets in disguise

  • @davidklassen5143
    @davidklassen5143 Місяць тому +3

    "Foreshadowing is a literary device-" killed me

  • @kris123o
    @kris123o 6 днів тому +2

    With the new 2.0 patch and DLC the game turned from pure crack to some insane concoction created by a mad scientist.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  6 днів тому +1

      I know! I can't wait to go back lmao

    • @kris123o
      @kris123o 3 дні тому +1

      @@connorconquers I hope you make a new video for space age. I also wanted to say I love your videos. I found your channel thanks to quinn69's video of him reacting to your PoE one showing up in my recommended. Ended up sharing this one and the PoE one with some friends afterwards as they're just that good.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  3 дні тому +1

      @@kris123o I'm thinking of doing a co-lab for Space Age. I'm pretty sure I'm making a part 2 for this guide.

    • @kris123o
      @kris123o 3 дні тому +1

      @@connorconquers Oh? Anyone in specific? And that's awesome. I love the way your videos are structured so even if it's not a guide I could see a more playthrough type video working well with your editing style. It reminds me of another youtuber but I'm unfortunately blanking on the name at the moment.

    • @connorconquers
      @connorconquers  15 годин тому

      I'm debating between getting someone good to carry me or getting several other trash players and fumbling thru it lol

  • @CurtisJensenGames
    @CurtisJensenGames 3 дні тому +2

    14:50 THE FACTORY MUST GROW

  • @thedocblock6421
    @thedocblock6421 5 місяців тому +3

    Setting the unrestricted, uncontrolled growth of industrialization to the song Tenebre Rosso Sangue is a combo that is much more fitting than I had thought. Well edited, fine sir.