The Harsh Realities Of Dating Dutch Women

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  • Опубліковано 21 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 105

  • @dimrrider9133
    @dimrrider9133 6 місяців тому +6

    I think the most important thing is that there is a spark because if it isnt there all your points can threw in a bin

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  6 місяців тому +2

      Thank you for sharing your perspective!

    • @a_ya5555
      @a_ya5555 2 місяці тому +1

      Spark = LIFESTYLE THINGS IN COMMON. It only works if you can handle living with them. Try it for a year, women will usually show who they are after 6 months. Be prepared to move on if they're garbage

  • @jenniferdoldersum559
    @jenniferdoldersum559 Місяць тому +3

    I am a Dutch woman and it seems adventurous to date a foreign man, but there are too many dating sites, and I am attracted to Latinos, I don't know why or what, but a Latino makes me nervous and my temperature rises quickly.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  Місяць тому

      If you live in the Netherlands, there are a lot of Latinos here luckily for you ;)

  • @Youhnanbinzacharia
    @Youhnanbinzacharia 4 місяці тому +2

    Goede tips. Dank voor de video. Ik had gewild dat ik jonger ben zodat ik uw tips effectief kan gebruiken.

    • @ArisAris-fs1ip
      @ArisAris-fs1ip 4 місяці тому +2

      Het is nooit te laat mijn vriend. Vertrouw me 💪

  • @khelben1979
    @khelben1979 17 днів тому

    I was together with a Dutch woman and it's a experience I'll never forget! I've never been to the Netherlands though and I would never want to live there. She doesn't live there either so these days you certainly don't need to travel there to find one. :)

  • @Siranoxz
    @Siranoxz 4 місяці тому +2

    I guess Dutch woman understand how to function in sink in Dutch customs and manners to the point that it makes foreigners very confused how to date Dutch people in general.
    It may come over as rude and mean, but i have to make clear that foreigners choose to come here and expecting their way of friendship and dating manners to work lol..
    But like everyone else, Dutch people are their own personality and having their own qualities and talents, it really depends from person to person.
    Its all the same for Dutch people living in other countries and having to change their other customs so they can function in other cultures.
    I do hope you have your luck here having to date a Dutch guy here and understanding how things actually work.. 👍👍
    My advise is, take it easy and chill, Dutch men do not ask for too much otherwise just to get to know you better, then and they will do the effort to know you..
    I hear that foreigners are often very alone and not be able to make friends and contact with Dutch people.

  • @RichardWicky
    @RichardWicky 7 місяців тому +21

    If expats and migrants were to learn the language first, it would make dating or building friendships with a Dutch person easier!!

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому +2

      Possibly! That's one of the reasons I included in the video. Thank you for watching! :)

    • @elskooi1843
      @elskooi1843 3 місяці тому

      If the Dutch were not so eager to showcase their English that would help 😉

    • @RichardWicky
      @RichardWicky 3 місяці тому

      @@elskooi1843 Speak for yourself and not about all Dutch people, because you don't know what you're saying, friend.There are only a few provinces where they do that, and that is South and North Holland

    • @elskooi1843
      @elskooi1843 3 місяці тому

      @@RichardWickyI an Dutch, I live in the eastern part of the country and lived up north before. It really was no different there. Are you Dutch by any chance?

    • @RichardWicky
      @RichardWicky 3 місяці тому

      @@elskooi1843 😂🤣dan ben jij ook geen echte nederlander maar gewoon zo een meelopertje die niet beter weet. Het is hier nederland en geen engeland of amerika,als mensen niet eens het fatsoen en respect hebben onze taal te leren gewoon oprotten met dat volk.als ik migreer zou ik dat als eerst doen uit respect voor land en volk.maar in veel landen en hier onderhand is het respect ver te zoeken.Dat Rusland maar een paar kernbommetjes gooit,zieke wereld BAH

  • @jannetteberends8730
    @jannetteberends8730 5 місяців тому +4

    You forgot a fourth reason women don’t want to date foreigners. Because in a lot of cases it would be a step back. Dutch relations are very egalitarian. I’ve had several friends that dated a foreigner, and this was always the breaking point. Men expecting respect when they don’t deserve it.
    A little example from statistics of teen pregnancies: Dutch teenagers use double protection during sex. A condom and contraceptive jelly. So Dutch boys take their responsibility. It’s the only country in the table (=world) for which this is mentioned.
    So the first time a Dutch girl has sex with a foreigner she’s often confronted with a man that has no idea about his role in preventing pregnancies and STDs.
    Of course foreign women like to date Dutch men. For them it’s a step forward.

    • @williamgeardener2509
      @williamgeardener2509 5 місяців тому

      And you should also include the fact that in a lot of cultures when a woman has had sex with a man without being married, they are automatically regarded as cheap whores which deserve to be treated as cheap whores. This conflicts with the open mindedness of Dutch women.

    • @victorcretu7741
      @victorcretu7741 3 місяці тому

      "Of course foreign women like to date Dutch men. For them it’s a step forward."
      Foreign women do not want to date Dutch men. Tolerance is not acceptance.
      You do not want a man who tolerates your behavior. You want a man who likes it or at least accepts it.

    • @sonicmiku3009
      @sonicmiku3009 3 місяці тому

      If dutch women knew about this why not not having sex with them to begin with. Why go there extra mile for protection when the men can just be as cooperative. Sounds like a lot of work but that's just me.

    • @jannetteberends8730
      @jannetteberends8730 2 місяці тому

      @@Angelmndy zaaddodende paste. Internationaal double dutch genoemd. Het schijnt heel specifiek voor nederlandse tieners te zijn.

  • @ClintonSnow
    @ClintonSnow 7 місяців тому +2

    Great video, please do more videos about DATING DUTCH WOMEN.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому

      Thank you! What would you be interested in?

    • @ClintonSnow
      @ClintonSnow 7 місяців тому +1

      ​@@theselfishcodependent how foreign guy date a Dutch woman with success?

    • @athos5359
      @athos5359 6 місяців тому

      @@ClintonSnow be tal and good looking,and not to old for her.

    • @AlexBarnes-v2d
      @AlexBarnes-v2d 6 місяців тому

      @@ClintonSnow depends where your from the norms are different in the lowlands (Belgium & Nederlands)

    • @mohamedfiraz7041
      @mohamedfiraz7041 8 днів тому

      Nice vidio
      Am Accountant looking for a Dutch girl

  • @jaud007
    @jaud007 2 місяці тому

    I guess i would request some help with this subject. I'm a fairly new learner of the Dutch language and everything dutch entirely. Recently I planned to study my masters from Rotterdam in 2025, and met this 1 Dutch girl online thats really innocent and just really cute all around but I'm not sure what it's she would be looking for with me ( I'm 23 shes 20). I ofcourse want to give her the safety and company as a friend and not say weird love things or marriage proposals etc. but I'd love to know the culture of the women in Netherlands, if dutch born and raised women value marriages or do they think about having a marriage and things like that ? You did mention that Dutch women like to take it slow however this girl is moving to dubai for vacation where i stayand is hoping for me of all people to pick her up and book her into a hotel for 2 weeks(she is paying for her hotel which is also a green flag). It's been maybe 5 months we've spoken and chatted over the phone. would really Appreciate some tips and what it is I need to know.
    Thank you for the video✅

  • @shutting88
    @shutting88 7 місяців тому +5

    Dating starts from attracting people, so if you are as tall as or as good looking as local guys, you may have a higher chance compared to other internationals. Working on style, being jacked, improved social skills, and financial status would definitely help. A tall black guy may attract a Dutch girl in a club easily for a night but keeping her would be more challenfing because of cultural differences.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому +1

      Thank you for sharing your point of view! I think while certain traits might catch someone's eye initially, genuine compatibility and understanding play crucial roles in the longevity of a relationship. And that requires a whole different set of skills that focuses more on connecting on a deeper level.

    • @roy_for_real2674
      @roy_for_real2674 4 місяці тому

      Im afraid most of these things won't help much in attracting Dutch women.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  4 місяці тому

      @@roy_for_real2674 good to know your point of view.

  • @shutting88
    @shutting88 7 місяців тому +1

    My female friend told me that almost her all likes on Tinder would become a match so it's hard to balance between quality and quantity.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому +1

      Good point! It's a flip side of the coin: what happens when there is too much variety?

    • @a_ya5555
      @a_ya5555 2 місяці тому +1

      If you're on tinder you got stds. No thanks

  • @Gibberish1983
    @Gibberish1983 Місяць тому +1

    This is such bullshit. I’m Latin American living in The Netherlands for more than 20 years. I have dated countless of Dutch women in different ways and they have been pretty expressive about their feelings and everything as well as quite flexible when they are really into you. A lot of them do secretly appreciate small manly gestures and do want to “surrender” to their man in some way. It is just a lot less obvious than with women from other cultures (who I also have plenty of experience with)

  • @AlexBarnes-v2d
    @AlexBarnes-v2d 6 місяців тому +3

    Als a halve Azish (Japanses van mij mouder) en Wit; Ik vind dat vrouwen uit Nederland leuk mij meer dan vrouwen uit Amerika of VK. It hulps dat Ik ben lang (185cm) en Nederlands spreken of probeer 😂
    As as a half Asian (Japanese from my mum) and white; I like that Dutch women like me more than women from America or UK. It helps that I am tall (6'1") and I speak Dutch or try to. 😂

  • @Explorer-i2s
    @Explorer-i2s 7 місяців тому

    Is their any app we can chat with Dutch people?
    If their is then plz let us know.
    International subscribers r waiting 😊

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  6 місяців тому +1

      I'm not aware of an app for Dutch people only ;) You can try language exchange websites if you want to speak Dutch with the Dutch 😀

    • @ArisAris-fs1ip
      @ArisAris-fs1ip 4 місяці тому

      There is Chat gpt bro....

  • @BulldogBS2016
    @BulldogBS2016 3 місяці тому

    Well being raised by a Dutch born father in the states I have lots to learn for my trip to Arnhem next summer. Dutch women seem like simple and amazing young ladies. Of course this can vary but it seems Dutch girls know what they like and don’t like. I speak it which can help and I have an Indonesian mother so I have indo look too (not my favorite feature). Either way, I look forward to my trip there and see how the Netherlands 🇳🇱 is in comparison to my life in the states.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  3 місяці тому +1

      Curious about your impressions! You are welcome to share them either on my Instagram or here :) Instagram @theselfishcodependent

    • @BulldogBS2016
      @BulldogBS2016 3 місяці тому

      Let’s plan a collab then if you’re open to the idea.

    • @BulldogBS2016
      @BulldogBS2016 2 місяці тому

      @@Angelmndy well I appreciate the comment and will definitely look more into my heritage :) I am very proud of my background.

    • @BulldogBS2016
      @BulldogBS2016 2 місяці тому

      @@Angelmndy it will be my third time, just it’s been a feet long time since I went last talking here 2009 long ago. So I’m excited to come back. Just subbed to you

    • @BulldogBS2016
      @BulldogBS2016 2 місяці тому

      @@Angelmndy also the blind experience would be something I want to try I also remember there are castles you can stay at and experience the medieval 🏰 life

  • @ReinhardtVerster
    @ReinhardtVerster 6 місяців тому

    Dutch is not complicated it’s a culture and a very successful i am Afrikaans but I hear Dutch speak it and write it. But the Netherlands is where I come from

  • @theselfishcodependent
    @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому

    How is your experience? Can you relate to what I've shared in the video? 🤔I am curious!
    👉 Watch my other videos:
    Before you start dating Dutch men: ua-cam.com/video/31HkisGfZXE/v-deo.html
    Dating Dutch men: ua-cam.com/video/iBXQZ_wwfmc/v-deo.html
    Mental health interview with a psychologist: ua-cam.com/video/1FxTHKlaNMI/v-deo.html
    👐 My coaching services - www.taniabozheva.com/coaching/

    • @RichardWicky
      @RichardWicky 7 місяців тому

      Well, I have been following videos here of expats and migrants for years, and I find it interesting to see how they deal with culture and traditions.I think that is nice to see, and it also makes my vision of our country a little more positive.Because, as a born Dutchman, I look at our country very differently than expats and migrants do.But I often notice in the videos that after years of living here, not much has been done with the language.And my opinion is that that should be number 1 if you are going to live in another country. I would do that, if only out of respect for the population, and so that I understand better what is going on in the country.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому +1

      @@RichardWicky awesome that you are interested in it! Since you mentioned that you'd like to learn different view points, I suggest you watch this video about learning Dutch. Perhaps, it can bring another perspective :)
      ua-cam.com/video/WBihk_N-VJQ/v-deo.htmlsi=PQ6x1Aa7lLUjEYQi

    • @RichardWicky
      @RichardWicky 7 місяців тому

      @@theselfishcodependent I have seen this video and already liked it, as a Dutch person I can only speak for myself. As expats and migrants, no matter how poorly Dutch they speak, I have the utmost respect for them.Maybe that is also because I have the principle that when I migrate to another country, I want to learn the language first because I want to make myself understood by the population.But you're doing well, respect. You're one of the people I regularly follow and like, but I'm just not a big chatter or texter myself.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  7 місяців тому +1

      @@RichardWicky oh so nice to hear :) Thanks so much for your support, I really appreciate it!

  • @chris24j48
    @chris24j48 6 місяців тому

    All good advice 🎉!

  • @Jamespwickstromw
    @Jamespwickstromw 4 місяці тому +3

    Dutch girls play games and make things very difficult, most are for fun only.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  4 місяці тому

      Sorry you've had this experience 🤗

    • @a_ya5555
      @a_ya5555 2 місяці тому

      So they have tiny brains and are used up? Got it. I'll stick to small town florida women, just as cute and better standards.

    • @VonGoldfinger
      @VonGoldfinger 2 місяці тому

      Pompen en dumpen

    • @CristianMan-js1dt
      @CristianMan-js1dt Місяць тому

      This means flirt, usual escalation…

  • @kiekert7499
    @kiekert7499 3 місяці тому +1

    For me the most annoying situation is when a man is overly trying his best (try to hard), like “you’re amazing, I love you bla bla bla”, speak about “deep topics” like “when are we getting married”…..on a first date (or second, or third). Wtf, I don’t even know you and you don’t know me after just a couple of dates. All those bla bla Words are empty phrases, superficial, not genuine.
    I get the creeps of such behavior. Sorry, there’s the door, goodbye, have a good life.
    “Dutch women don’t express themselves…”
    I cannot speak for all Dutch women, everyone (anywhere on the planet) is unique in personality.
    But please don’t say “I love you” and all that kind of bullshit after just a couple of dates and speaking about marriage a few weeks later. For me that’s a No-Go.
    I heard enough stories of people who just met each other, thought they were in love and get married. A couple of months later divorced because “he or she wasn’t who I thing he/she was”. Yeah…duh!!!

    • @a_ya5555
      @a_ya5555 2 місяці тому +2

      No one does that. Get real

    • @E.M.jansnow
      @E.M.jansnow 2 місяці тому

      Nihilistically Exaggerated story. For every reaction there is an equal or opposite force.

  • @hansb57
    @hansb57 4 місяці тому

    I think the "agenda"stuff is BS. The women I met were available to meet on very short notice. I even said in my online profiel that if you need an agenda to meet me skip me and everybody understood that and felt the same. It is true however that making appointments with friends can sometimes take some time. I never met anybody that can't squeeze in 2 or 3 hours to meet. And I dated a lot until I met my wife!

  • @mohamedfiraz7041
    @mohamedfiraz7041 8 днів тому

    Looking for a dutch girl
    Nice video

  • @brebuoch
    @brebuoch 10 днів тому

    I don't care what country, culture, or excuse, ghosting is WRONG. For a society that values equality, like the Dutch, it is wrong since it shows a lack of equal level of respect as a person. Nothing justifies not communicating, on a basic level because the other side may wonder if something tragic happened. Ghosting is for cowards.

  • @vip0404
    @vip0404 Місяць тому

    It is true that dutch women like Arabs and turks?

  • @SteveDickerson837
    @SteveDickerson837 3 місяці тому

    Do you speak Dutch?

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  3 місяці тому

      @@SteveDickerson837 ja zeker!

    • @SteveDickerson837
      @SteveDickerson837 3 місяці тому

      @@theselfishcodependent nice I’m from Belgium but grew up speak French but Dutch is a very cool language.

  • @DjRenect
    @DjRenect 3 місяці тому

    A fish, telling fisherman how to catch fish. I'll leave it there.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  3 місяці тому +2

      haaa, funny! Have you actually watched the video? I clearly mentioned there how I gathered the info

  • @Hatsikidee02
    @Hatsikidee02 3 місяці тому

    Rustaggggg!!

  • @jonessmith3997
    @jonessmith3997 3 місяці тому

    Plan the future in a diary? Control or what. What happened to independent women or men. This shouts high maintenance. Get rid after you get laid.

  • @WilliamJones-sf5pt
    @WilliamJones-sf5pt 6 місяців тому

    How many ponies will it cost me to purchase a Dutch woman? Can I purchase multiple Dutch women with a single horse? An elephant?

    • @jannetteberends8730
      @jannetteberends8730 5 місяців тому +4

      Can you change a diaper?

    • @WilliamJones-sf5pt
      @WilliamJones-sf5pt 5 місяців тому +1

      @@jannetteberends8730 So? Dutch women don't have a sense of humor then. I think that was the point of the video. I was just testing whether this was true ✔

    • @jannetteberends8730
      @jannetteberends8730 5 місяців тому

      @@WilliamJones-sf5pt you are a perfect example of the forth reason we don’t want to date foreigners.
      First, your joke isn’t funny at all for women with some self respect.
      Second, you didn’t get the hint.
      Most Dutch women don’t want a relationship with a man they have to educate to their own level.

    • @MCV630
      @MCV630 5 місяців тому +1

      lol

    • @athos5359
      @athos5359 4 місяці тому +1

      @@jannetteberends8730 nah it s because most foreigners are to short to begin with,even for men born in belguim it s insane hard to impress a dutch woman because how used dutch woman are to the dutch men,there s a reason why dutch men are wanted by al woman in the eu.

  • @HellenDeutsch-hl9pi
    @HellenDeutsch-hl9pi Місяць тому

    A scary thing to date a Dutch woman, dear.

    • @theselfishcodependent
      @theselfishcodependent  Місяць тому +1

      🥹🥲

    • @HellenDeutsch-hl9pi
      @HellenDeutsch-hl9pi Місяць тому

      but dont lower your standards love. Thanks to that I can enjoy the high standards for dutch men with my dutch husband. I am very thankful to Dutch women.

  • @smilingatbadpeople1413
    @smilingatbadpeople1413 3 місяці тому

    IT'S TO BUSY YOU ARE NOT WELCOME!

  • @House.ofAI_
    @House.ofAI_ 10 годин тому

    I'm Dutch and avoided Dutch women like the plague. They are a lot of better flavors.