John Wick, but as a Seagal Movie
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- Опубліковано 29 кві 2023
- The greatest action hero*, now in the greatest action franchise.
Watch us make this: • We Replaced John Wick ...
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This Episode ►
Can the John Wick franchise withstand losing Keanu Reeves? We put it to the ultimate stress-test. Does it hold up?
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John Thick may be slow, but he's deadly... to a buffet table.
His finisher move is seating on your face and Suffocating you to death 😂😂😂
😂
They changed the title right?
I remember it just john thicc
@@ThatSlayerguy he makes you the chair
And the chairs. I can hear the creaking from a mile away.
If Seagal didn't take himself too serious, he could've been a great comedy actor 😂
there is Steven Seagal as Cock Puncher in the Onion movie.
It's because he takes it so serious that it's so funny
Very true. His classic Mountain Dew commercial from the 90s showed he actually had some comic timing.
He is friends with a terror leader
fuur Real!
Seagal shooting and sitting while moving with his chair has to be the greatest piece of cinema ever created! That shit cracks me up 😂
there is one movie with Segal where he does kung fu (kinda of) fighting while sitting in an office chair (only a fraction of that fight is in this John Thick video) .... also hilarious.
Watch his movie "Out for a Kill" it's from that and longer.
Him using his feet to propel the chair and himself forward is the funniest shit ive seen in awhile.
I actually had a hard time figuring out what's real vs. staged.
Yeah that had me DYING. Even more since that's apparently from one of his actual movies. It's a good thing I don't have roommates because I was laughing pretty hysterically at that for a good minute. 😅
The shot at 0:36 of him wheeling through the shootout scene is brilliant.
The real armchair warrior.
Duded its even worse when you realize its CGI, of him in a chair. Even the CGI team was like, yeah I can't make this look realistic if he stands.
I'm really glad you included both of those moments when he needlessly transitioned his firearms from one hand to the other lol
Yo, you forgot to include the moment where he transitions from white to native American
Well technically its not completely pointless. When youre going around a corner you want to have a rifle in the opposite hand so its against the shoulder furthest from the corner so you can aim at the corner without your whole head sticking out around the corner.
He just did it extremely awkwardly.
@@ge2719 We've used him as an example in what not to do in firearms training.
I love how he kept his finger on the trigger when swapping hands with the pistol.
@@ge2719 There are better ways to transition & see around corners than to waste time changing hands.....
MASTERPIECE the cinematography, the acting, the music and the CHAIR the story the set (chef kiss)
The part where it was shattered in pieces as Mr. Thick reminisces about it... I cried!
The CHAIR is worthy of an Oscar.
That chair may be wooden, but not half as wooden as Seagal... I cried, for that broken chair.
Return of the king of all action movies!
The chair proves that the most.
please stop kissing your fingers
I'm not joking when I say this: I would go to cinema to see Steven Seagal recreate the entire John Wicky movie while fighting sitting down.
I am totally bored of movies. That one would be great fun.
John Wicky made me chuckle
Me too this would be hilarious
The fact that no one has mentioned how genius “The Last Stand” is hurts me. Truly incredible marketing 😂
I can't believe you actually got the real Steven Seagal for the running scene - no one could fake that running style!
funny thing is that they actually tried to do the run irl but it was so hard that they instead used CGI to simulate the arms flailing
1 of his many stunt doubles. He uses them for walking and standing too!
Reminds me of a goose running
God 😂 I’m still laughing every time I see it, time and time again 😂
John Thick doesn't need a bulletproof suit. His body fat percentage is high enough to repel any attack. 😂
Bohahahahaa 😂😢😅
@@Kiss4cooper But if he runs he dies
Not to mention repel every woman who he does not pay handsomely to have around.
HAHAHAHAHA
Outrageous BMI and toupee!
Him wheeling around on the computer chair was absolute gold. 🤣
Its almost like Keanu and Seagul are the exact opposite in talent, charisma, ethics, and skill.
It is funny, because Lionsgate produces movies of both of them. But while John Wick nearly became a straight to video movie, the talent put in by everyone involved meant that it would become a hit. And it did, because if you have something good, something that is fun and dare I say inspirering, it doesn´t matter how many obstacles are in the way. Like the fact they didn´t even get permitts to shoot the action driving scenes for the first movie.
Meanwhile Seagal has movies that could in theory be decent, not good but decent action movies, even though they are recycled of other movies´ ideas, one can´t deny that it is kind of like watching a sequel:" The same stuff again, but rearranged".
But what hinders Seagal in becoming a good actor, and his movies to become decent action movies(they can be decent and still straight to video, art is art if it is, no matter how prestigeous it may be) is lazyness.
There is this joke that the only way his movies could have a use for anyone would be for money laundering, but if you think about it, it is hard to see why anyone would want to write a script for a movie, that is only finished to 20 percent, and then act in it, and then not even put effort into acting.
Even with someone like Schwarzenegger, who can act sometimes but is no Robert Di Niro, you see he tries hard.
With Seagal, he doesn´t.
Then the stupidity of the movies, movie can get away with being unrealistic, like fast and furious two, but they have to immerse the watched into believing that whatever happens on screen makes sense in the world of the movie.
With Seagal, the rules of the movie world are set up, and not followed.
Which is why, noone cares for the characters achievments, because they don´t mean anything.
Then, the thing John Wick does really good, the action.
Even if someone finds the plot idiotic(it may be simplistic, but it isn´t idiotic), the hand to hand fight scenes are top notch, and the most realistic out of all the John Wick movies.
The gun fight scenes are realistic too, and even though Keanu improved throughout the movies, especially with John Wick 3, in his first outing as the character he already handles guns in a believeable manner, so we buy John Wick as a former hitman, who didn´t sissy around and was IN the action.
Seagal on the other hand, not only violates almost all(if not all, but I can´t be bothered to watch his movies fully)firearm safety rules and behaves in such a way, that everybody understands that he has no clue how to even hold a gun, which is even more funny, because an actual veteran taught him for a lot of his straight to dvd movies, and he tries to hold them similar to how Keanu holds them, but fails miserably.
But that is still better than his fighting, which while his gun fu is bad, atleast some roles he plays he is a normal person, so him no knowing how to hold a gun in an action scenario makes sense.
But him "winning" with his waddeling around and bitch slapping of the enemy, breaks the last bit of believeability that his movies have.
Even if they were a carricatur of modern hollywood, noone would use a human bean bag for action scenes, atleast if the human bean bag can´t fight.
Because if Keanu Reeves was shaped like Steven Seagal, he would have massive problems fighting, because he would be a massive target with little muscles , but he could still do some impressive shit, because he is a really, really proficient fighter, and could overcome those obsticles.
Meanwhile Seagal in Keanus body, that is slim but with muscles, would loose against a lot of fighters.
Admittedly, Seagal does know some little Akido, but I think that he would be so unfocused, that anybody able to take a punch still have a 50/50 chance to beat him, if the have luck.
If someone knows a deeper-going martial art, or even akido themselves, or even just how to do a basic jab(if strong enough), they would win 9/10 times.
And I hate to say that, because Seagal could have become a good fighter.
Not necassarly the same level as Jean Claude Van Damm or Keanu Reeves, but good enough to not be a total cringe fest.
If then he had the talent to laugh at himself and collaborate with other action stars, like Van Damm, he could still be making pretty good movies, and maybe if he worked on his acting he could have become an actor that accasionly has good movies.
But because of his narcism he dug himself into the hole, where noone takes him serious, and the only "fan" he has that actually knows fighting sports is Jean Claude Van Damm, partly I imagine out of pity, but mainly because Jean Claude Van Damm actually wants to give Seagal a chance and is a pretty cool guy towards Seagal.
Meanwhile Seagal tries to shittalk him every opportunity, but only shows that he is a low cow.
And Van Damm compliments Seagal, but indirectly shows, that Seagal defiently is too heavy to fight.
I AIN'T READING ALLAT!
@@psychopathgaming.-bv3tt TLDR: There are S.W.A.T guys that are impressed with Reeves gun handling and fighting abilities, and even Putin doesn´t want to be associated with Seagal.
Alr thank you@@iammrbadguy9706
all of that plus matters of basic human decency, credibility, work ethic, the law, hair, weight management, IQ, will power, dressing and acting casual, hygiene, useful skills, actually knowing a martial art, employing a useful martial art and of course the ancient ways of not being a dipshit.
Been a while since the last time Steven Seagal worked on such a high budget production.
High buffet production
😂😂😂😂😂😂
The recent movies of his have gone straight to audio
Hi chair
*high
Props for highlighting Steven’s adopted black voice, ever since Glimmer Man he’s considered himself a brother. The “yeah, I’m thinking I’m black” line is pure gold
Is that the new "transraceal" trend, where more and more people identify themself as another race that they weren't born with?
That's not a black voice, that's his Louisiana Bayou accent. He picked that up when he was decided to be a cop. Just sayin...
I thought that's what he said🤣🤣🤣
@@Hanibul_Lecktor he changed accents in between talking to people in that show he did
@Mr Big B you remember? Was crazy seeing him with a 44" waist and Cajun accent. I thought it was a skit, fake etc...Nah, that was real !!! Haha good times
Even when they tried to parody the poorly imposed helmet shot, it looked great. Man you guys are so so talented!!!
They know their source material
It looks even better than how Seagal’s face was CGIed into a motorcycle man’s helmet in China Salesman
One of the funniest things I've ever seen when Segal was popping off while scuttling around in an office chair.
Can't remember last time I laughed so hard.
Then the way he ran... with his pants falling down.... LMAO
Now I genuinely want to watch a full length Steven seagal movie.- only if corridor makes it.
Under Siege 1/2 is good
@@drewzalo also Above the Law, most of his early 90s stuff was cool
@@renslo689 Back in the days when he occasionally stood up.
Haha yeah. Under siege 1&2 are good. Also, executive decision, where seagal doesn’t just stand but he flies out of the plane (and dies) early in the movie.
@@jayH325 he was still relevant when that came out, surprised he signed on for that. Maybe the pay was good.
This is incredible. Id pay a gold coin to see 118 more minutes.
Seagal only does 90 minutes LOL
@@Reacher_2215 still more time than Pedro Pascal on set!
@@Reacher_2215 Yer 90 minutes stretched out over 12 monthly instalments!!😂and a years supply of Ben and Jerrys chocolate chip ice cream😂
@@pv-mm2or and a mandatory trip to the strip club with every movie shoot
@@Reacher_2215 80 of them are just copy paste clips.
That CG Seagal with a slight exaggeration of his weird run and the ass crack hanging out nearly killed me. 🤣🤣🤣
"Wunz habbanormu skunform tubin theyu kinta kehi malbo weigh buhway fermawer" I think the sheer insight of this genius phrase gave me existential crisis. A true inspiration to us all.
Steven will definitely see this, and that amuses me greatly.
and it’s even more amusing that he will genuinely be offended, whilst also arguing why he’d be John Wick 🤣
/Imagine Steven Seagal receiving texts from friends aboutt he new trailer for his new movie John Thick
HE WILL SUE for using is thickness
@@fionnbarrcasey5247 No, why he'd be _better_ than John Wick.
He moved to Russia. He has no friends. He doesn't watch UA-cam. He will have no way of knowing lol
The gun transition from right to left hand is absolutely hilarious!
lololol
It's actually a thing though. Just don't know how good he did it, since I'm not trained.
@@clockwork204
I am( military guy myself) and you are right, the transition from to another hand is a real technique and actually very useful, if you do it right. The thing is, he is not doing it right. He his technique is sloppy, slow and just not right.
@@vencislavgynev8282 he's 70 year old
@@vencislavgynev8282 Im also pretty sure your not suppose to do it every 5 seconds, enemy literally running at him and hes just changing grips.
This trailer is already better than Steven Seagal’s entire film career.
you definitely missed Submerged
Knowing Seagal, he probably took credit for this trailer and said he made it
“People keep asking if I’m fat. Yeah I’m thinking I’m fat.”
😂😂😂
"Yeah. I'm thinking I'm black."
Bro the way he ran 😂😂😂😂
You can slip a cookie in there
@@Simigemastop it 😂😂
Steering a fucking pirate ship 😂
Hes doing the thug shaker
Like an ostrich..
John Thick: I saw him once eat 3 full pizzas in a bar with ramen.
John Wick: I saw him once kill three men in a bar with a pen.
glad you had the more in shape and completely different looking body double. thats my favorite Seagal trope
Gives "you run, you die" a whole new meaning
0:36 is the greatest thing I have ever seen outside of a bar in Thailand
Watch as this gazzelle runs with his hands flailing 😂
Corridor confirms they used you to go through his movies, this is all because of your sacrifice!
You should be a special guest of honour in this. And your comment should be pinned.
Why am I not surprised to find SpaceIce here? Lol 😂
I’m glad I found SpaceIce here 😂
0:59 cracks me up everytime.
Steven Seagal would be a legend if he would actually see & appreciate the humor.. and to also make a movie fully about parodying himself.
He is a legend . . . in his own mind. 😁
The Unbearable Weight of Enormous Ego.
Starring Steven Frederick Seagal.
He is a great actor already
The Chair deserves an Oscar. Such a moving performance!
I gave it a standing ovation 👏👏👏
It deserves an Oscar for its supporting role.
Him rolling around in his chair shooting people jad me dying. Lol.
Not only that, he had done a fight scenes sitting down. Not even joking.
@@Victimesty I’d say the bulk of his movies have fight scenes from a chair it’s hilarious
We really need to have this made. Only so Space Ice can make a video tearing it a new one.
😂😂😂
The special effects in this are better than actual Segal films
hahah this was insanely well done. The part where he's running and it cuts to the back with his pants low 🤣🤣🤣
This is insanely good! I’m falling out of my *chair* laughing at this!
are you ok?
@@RodrigoRenzo the chair’s fine, I asked it
The chair they broke lol
So long as you're not falling out of John Thick's chair...
😂 irony
"let me tac/tank up... (on the whiskey)" ... awesome..😁😁😁
That chair scene is wild asf his legs got crying n laughing for real 😂😂😂
The but crack cracked me up but not as much as the face replacement in the helmet IN CLOSE UP!!! Hilarious. This is art!
Having watched all the VFX artists react episodes, I understood that reference
Im pretty sure the face replacement thing was just straight up footage from one of his movies and not a thing done by Corridor. Which is honestly funnier in hindsight.
@@SovietMarmalade I saw the 'making of' after this and... they did the comp. They replaced his face. But competently.
@@HenkJanBakker aahh, right right. Haven't seen the BTS vid yet.
One of Seagal's movies *does* have scenes where they just comped his face onto the helmet of the stunt driver. Is them doing this referenced in the BTS? its one of the funniest things ever haha
@@SovietMarmalade Yes.
I was very close to laughing when I saw Seagal in the chair at the museum just scooting his feet along shooting people 😆
That plumbers crack while he's running...LOL Genius!!!!
The last time I flew, they showed a Steven Seagal movie on the plane. Half the audience walked out.
"I'm thinkin im black" killed me
🤣""and he did it all...sitting down" and his running had me dying
You know that giggling noise you make when you want to laugh but it just comes out as little sniffs. I just did a lot of those.
"Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should"
- behind the scene of making this monstrosity
John Thick was in every scene in that franchise movie but still somehow managed to end up on the editors cutting room floor; he also choreographed every fight and action scene in the movie where he re-used all the techniques he taught Bruce Key; he also organised funding for the movie from his best friend Vlad Putrid and managed to get very favourable terms as well in exchange for land in Russian speaking regions of the USA; and is now waiting for his Oscar Nomination for Best Bullsh!tter, Make Believe Artist and All Round Badguy to his fans (if they ever existed).
Greatest. Comment. Ever.
Bruce Key, lol!
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I found what I was looking for 😂
"You run you die" with the graphics of his heart almost exploding was amazing.
man i cant stop laughing with the running scene you people are unbelievable , thank you
This looks hilarious. I'd definitely buy a ticket if it came out as a action comedy
Oh my god this is brutal, theres nothing better than people ripping on the seagull
John Thicc is the character we didnt deserve, but needed. What a time to be alive
Yeah
why and how i dont get it where did you come from you're everywhere WTF
Separate people doing it
Segal ain't thicc, he's just thick.
@@blazenthunder3165 tbh I’m not sure, but I’m fairly positive it’s a bot
this is way too good for what it is. this is actually insane
Fantastic work! Love the jokes about him always sitting and his super strange run.
🤣 Damn you did him dirty with that runing scene. I love it!😂
You know, when you put it like this, it really does feel like a Steven Segal led film.
"John Thick may not stand often, but when he does... His joints creak."
"Baaaaaaaaam"-sound from trombones.
"John Thick, in a cinema near you".
loved the shooting from the chair bit
More effort went into making this trailer than Steven Segal's entire filmography.
I'd pay to see Steven Seagal's reaction to this
he’d be offended, and claim that he’s more badass than John Wick if he were a real person😂😂😂
@@fionnbarrcasey5247 Fortunatley I don't think Steven Seagal is a real person
Are you back?
Seagal: yeah I think I'm black
I love the added slurping sound after the "lemme tac up"
Okay, now we need a full movie
If Space Ice saw this, I wonder what his reaction would be?
Space Ice must see this if he hasn't yet!
The best Actor, marksman, lieutenant general, Martial artist, CIA, FBI agent, Harvard professor, acclaimed novelist, and sensai. He's just always the best.
He also "walks like a Black man, breathes like a killa." And will "Snatch every muthaf*c*in birthday." while killing innocent civilians.
That chair museum shootout killed me hahaha
John Thick: Gravy Seal. Order those tickets now guys!!
Please do everything you can to make this a full length movie, I'd pay to see it lol love this.
Absolutely hilarious! And seriously well done. You guys are really good!
I like how he closes his eyes when he shoots lol
There's a video of Rob Schneider telling a story he heard from a writer.
Seagal comes out of his trailer:
-I just read the greatest script I've ever read in my life.
-Really ? Who wrote it ?
-I did.
"Once ???? is confirmed being in there you can take him out but wait for my word."
If you could have worked in Weird Al Yankovic’s “Fat” this trailer would have been perfect!
I'm impressed with the chairs acting performance, he should be casted in a next action movie.
“Let me tack up” is now my favorite movie quote.
0:26 The way sensei switch hand so smooth
That butt crack kills me 😂😂😂
This had me in stitches, funniest thing I've seen in ages. Well done guys!
This needs to be brought to Tom Segura's attention immediately!!
Yes... yes, it does.
I've been sitting in chairs for like 85 years...
That chair's called a scooty - scoot scoot scoot scoot
Gone Thick does not just rolls his enemies, he fat rolls his enemies.
I’d unironically watch this
If only these enemies could weaponize a set of stairs...
"You run, you die" I was laughing hysterically omg, that's so fucking funny 🤣🤣🤣
That running is killing me :D
God I love John Thivk
Man, i have just watched a video about Steven Seagal just for fun, and then corridor uploads a Steven Segal John Wick mashup
Those chair scenes...mind blown. Even better than the flailing, mumbling and flinching scenes.
1:03 love the attention to detail - “john t.”
RIP Lance Reddick
I would love to see a whole Steven Seagal movie made by Corridor Crew with the most bizarre plot and sloppy action scenes ever 😆
His little feet paddling in the chair, omg, I can't. 🤣
I came for the run and wasn't disappointed.
Corridor won't ever run out of ideas, will they?
finally seagal gets the recoginiton he deserves, a true tactical genius
:)))))))))))) THAT WAS FANTASTIC. I had such a laugh :)))) Him moving with that chair underneath is....perfect.
This is absolutely fantastic, omg! Excellent, hilarious, and on-point.
Space Ice wept