Please Don't Ever Give Up
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- Опубліковано 2 чер 2024
- I don't normally comment on news events, but this one got to me. Let me know what you think about this complex issue.
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But I do care.
My husband was told by professionals that he would just always be anxious, and he would always be stuck on meds. Turns out we were both dealing with mold toxicity from our house. Left the house, got off the meds, and we are doing better every day.
How did you determine it was mold toxicity? Did your husband have any other symptoms?
@@kats9754Commenting to follow because I've heard about mold toxicity affecting physical and mental health.
most mental health issues have health related origins. but people cant get help from a doctor and psychologists and therapists learned about the mind so they cant help too much either, sometimes it works, fix your mind fix your body, but more times its faster and healthier to fix the body and the mind follows
@@kats9754 yes I need to know!
Y’all rely way too much on businesses and doctors. Realize that your Brain is super powerful and can mentally heal itself. It can cry on command if trained (actors), it can control your body temperature etc. It’s so powerful, yet y’all immediately resort into putting medicines into your bodies which is NOT FOOD! Many side effects.
That’s why politicians love dumb people, they can’t think critically for themselves hence they are easy to manipulate.
A psychatrist once told me that i will deal with depression for the rest of my life when I had only just turned 20 :(.. im 22 now and even though i have terrible days and anxiety, my quality of life has increased by like 1000%, i did it all myself because the mental health system is so flawed. I'm still trying to fully recover. But I'm glad i didn't give up
I’m glad you didn’t too. ♥️
power to you!
I went through a very rough depression then I went on vacation for ten days. That was all. Snapped me out of it.
Well done. 💜 This is not easy to push through
Same! I had 2 years of therapy to start me off. I couldn’t bring myself to do meds because it felt effortful and expensive to find the right one that would work for me. So, I used other outlets. I read books. I’ve been clinging onto journaling like I have been since 13. And I worked on things one step at a time. And I’m so much better for it. And knowing that my episodes are cyclical and have waves help. Because I know that the lows are temporary, and that they were getting shorter and shorter and lighter each time
Getting told "There's nothing more we can do for you" by a medical professional is heart breaking to say the least
When I feel low I think of the crucifixion of Jesus.
Honestly I prefer that to not being told anything at all and being left in the dark.
@@terywetherlow7970 THANK YOU AND AMEN!!!
I was told in 2021 that I would not get any better from a brain injury 1 years prior.
I was depressed and suicidal. I understand your pane of glass theory. I called it the box.
I chose to get better. I got better. I fought very hard for myself.
Never quit. Doctors do NOT know everything.
Have an ICU RN for 25 years. Although I haven't worked in two of them because I am now in a wheelchair, I never ever would let people give up hope. If they wanted an honest answer, I would tell them ," you have to ask me what I would do if this were my mother father sister Etc..". Because I can only tell you what I would do with the knowledge I have If This Were my family member. But I would never ever lose hope, for anyone. Even when they are taking their last breath I have seen crazy Miracles I have seen awful tragedies. Doctors don't know everything, usually the nurse is no more, lol I'm just kidding, but we do spend a lot more time with the patients. If you want to fight you fight and you never give up. Thank you for staying, we need you here with us❤❤
Is that all you can say?? Never Quit?? Smh
You did damn good. ❤
I chose to get better. Yeah it doesn’t always work like that. If it did nobody would be depressed.
Any doctor who tells you "you'll never get better" is either lazy or wants to make money off you. Are their just an asshole
I called a crisis line. They proceeded to tell me I wasn’t having a real crisis, and they needed to keep the line open for people who really need it.
Wow. That's just... wow.
Wtf 😡😡see this is why i never even bothered to try calling any of those numbers
See, this is what I mean. What the h*ll is the profession doing when they tell people in crisis that they're not in crisis??? They need to get their heads out of their ass*s and actually start helping. And at the least, "do no harm."
I stopped trying to look for any help just because I can't handle being retraumatized more. Those are the people who achieved this shit
This has happened to me, and it’s devastating. I am so sorry, i feel for you and send my love. Sarah ❤
Thank You, Scott. I am a 71 yr old single gal who has no family and a few friends. I struggle with feeling “ dis-connected “ from the World. Your very empathetic words are saving lives and truly helping people get through another day. I am sending warm and loving energy to all of us who are struggling. Hang-on everyone.
I really hope you have a lovely day!
I'm sending warm and loving energy back to you too. Struggling too.
Warmest wishes to ya hun ...the world is disconnected now. So sad.
I understand so much... please take care of yourself...it is a horrific time now but I believe God is at work.
I am a67-year-old married lady with no family other than a narcissist husband of almost 30 years. I have no way out because of $. I do have two friends who live about 400 miles away I get to see once or twice a year and that is my only escape. I have struggled with depression since childhood but so far, because of my faith, I keep hanging on.
It’s not malpractice, its malevolence
Exactly , that’s inhuman , she had hope , many of us had a lot of problems and fight to get by , this is wrong
They do it to save money.
@@firstnamelastnamethirdnameThat makes no sense. They make more money by keeping people hanging there. People need to pick a side, if they don’t offer a final solution , “they’re getting rich on her illness”; if they tell the person there’s nothing left to do “they’re saving money” 😂
You have hit the nail on the head. My first thought is that this is terrible beyond words but you have found the right one
@@Schrodingers_KatHow about we just tell the truth and say how vile and dystopian it is.
I have CPTSD from child abuse. I can't tell you how many therapists have told me, " you can only manage your symptoms, but you can't be cured." Therapy becomes a glorified form of bullying almost. I won't give up on myself.
And you shouldn’t! I also have cptsd from brother and mother abuse. But I’m telling you… we can be healed !🙏 It takes time surely, one day at a time.🧡
I have gotten so much better over the past few years just working on myself and it keeps me hopeful that I can live life without so much fear in my heart. I pray you the happiest recovery my love. 🤍You are going to take back your life. I’m cheering you on :)
Pete Walker’s book on CPTSD is very helpful with providing a roadmap for treatment. Those people don’t know what the hell they’re working with.
The thing is, it's OK if you can't be cured. It doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong. A lot of conditions are chronic and can be hard to manage, but it is just the nature of the sickness, not a moral failing
@ellotheregovna401 I read it, and while he explains the symptoms well, it falls short for me because it's too deterministic for me. I believe that survivors have the ability to achieve alot more than the therapeutic community leads on. I met a holocaust survivor who is 96 years old. He was told he needed to become a carpenter. He became a doctor, got married, and had a son who is a commercial pilot. In an interview when asked how he coped with the trauma, he said, "keeping busy help."
@@battlehymnoftheempath3610At the same time, if a therapist promised something they couldn't deliver they'd be giving the patient false hope.
I hate those mornings where I wake up and the first thing that comes into my head is "Fvck. Gotta do this again..." Those are long days.
I know, right? Since my oldest son took his own life in 2021, every day is like this. I'm alive and breathing for my youngest son, but that's about it. S**cide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, but it leaves permanent problems behind for us 'survivors'. My own family can't understand why I say my life is ruined, and they knew him! Irreplaceable son, human being, love of my life!
Wow, you said what I say every day. Im suffering from something,.. that caused insomnia, anxiety,... and depression. Guilt and unforgiveable forgivenes are unbearable for me.
🙏
I hate those mornings where I wake up.
@annehedonia156
I am sorry to hear that for you and that you have to go through this. I don't know why, but something came up on my mind and it felt that I had to share it with you. I hope it can give you a bit of peace of mind ❤️🩹 m.ua-cam.com/video/a-vc6Xk-hyc/v-deo.html&pp=gAQBiAQB
I have so many of those days, feels so lonely!
Best quote ‘some of us are playing Mario Bros, others are playing Dark Souls,’ I’m in the pits currently but this video has inspired me not to give up. Thank you
I'm playing Silver Surfer, Ninja Gaiden and Battletoads all at the exact same time. Already beaten the Sphere skill game from Trials Evolution and gotten the world record for it as well. That's how hardcore I am..
watch?v=TMdvQql4tyY
I'm not a video gamer, but know enough to get that one. LOL
@@Cloven137 Haha, I doubt it. I raise you nearly 20 minutes of world records in N+. Regarded one of the hardest platform games to speedrun. You had to do 5 levels in a row perfectly, before registering any of the times in them. I did 4 other perfect lvl runs at the same as each one of these clips. Life difficulty is still harder than all of these together, though. I'll write the book about it. Read it later. Gonna be called 'You Won't Believe My Story'. Epic video. Should have millions of views..
watch?v=Pqghwml2CxU
haha I feel that many peers around me are playing dark souls and I'm playing FEAR AND HUNGER
I’m playing Dark Souls figuratively and literally
My father killed himself in 2006, I found out years later that only a few months before he died, he was told by a board of doctors in a mental hospital that if he ever "came back" they would make him a ward of the state and never let him go.
thats horrible... I'm so sorry that your dad had to go through that. I'm also sorry for your loss.
Truly hideous. 🙏
💔
Im so sorry 😞 what a horrific thing.
I am so sorry. That should never have happened to him.
What’s worse though is when you’re poor and don’t have the money to get help. It’s food or a better life…
I’ve been homeless, I’ve lived in my car, I’ve lost everything over and over again. During those times I did the most work that I’ve ever done seeking out resources and ways to be better. There is a ton of free information and help online, if you look for it. If instead you read about others in pain like you and none of them are offering options for healing, you’ll just stay in pain. You should be able to qualify for healthcare in the marketplace and within that plan they are required to offer you mental health services, and all towns offer free mental health services. But beyond that, you have a million answers at your fingertips. You started out right when you looked at a vid that was asking you not to give up. Keep moving forward and finding positive helpful resources online, not just things that confirm your pain, bc it is valid, you have every right to feel it. It’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility, and you can do it. You can be who you want to be, you just need to imagine them and work towards them. Believe they exist, and fight for their place. There are books and podcasts and a million websites that can help you.
I started by just consuming a ton of comedy because it takes the icky glaze off of my heart so I can start to find better options for how to face my demons. You’ve just got to figure out what kind of thing you respond to and then seek that out. I encourage you find something that makes you laugh, and let it lighten your heart enough to find something to help you heal. Just keep laughing until you have the strength to heal, bc laughing will keep your head above water until you have the strength to heal
Our economic system is terribly unequal and unsustainable. It’s awful that so many people can’t access healthcare.
@@catlyn777I know this all too well unfortunately. I come from a poor-middle social class and have an extremely unhealthy relationship with money. I will literally avoid eating bc it just costs too much when I can instead skip the meal and just suck it up… I hate it so much. Similarly, I’ve wanted to see a therapist for the last couple years but after being drained financially by my last psychiatrist, I don’t see how it would be worth it when it may not even work for me. I actually downloaded the “better help” app just yesterday, but even that charges like $60 a week which I just can’t see being worth it so I ended up deleting it. It’s a sad world we live in 😔
You don't need money to move forward! Most therapists are meh to bad frankly - doing your own research on psychology, techniques to help cope better, and especially working on body awareness - exercising to strengthen your body, figuring out what foods it does best with, tuning into stored tension and learning how to release stuff. It's especially empowering to make progress this way because you realise that while help from others is special and needed for some things, for the main stuff you can totally work it out yourself. Courage!
@@Anomalous_Sophistahh, was wondering how much it costed briefly... the ads don't mention $60 per week, and I feel like it might be, for some, a set and forget subscription, which makes the company cash without as much work as non subscription companies
I attempted it many years ago. We used to tell people "depression lies," and that the lies are the ideas that "things will never get better" or "you'd be better off dead." Now, it seems more doctors and politicians would rather accept that lie because it's easier and less expensive than saving lives. It's horrifying.
So you’re trying to say you were a bully?
@@tslinger21 What? I said that depression tells lies like "things will never get better," and that it's horrifying that more dr's and politicians would rather repeat the lie. How on Earth is that bullying?
@@365ral ah, now I see what you meant. Sorry, misunderstood you there 😅
Not exactly. Politicians don’t want to spend money to help us get better, and money is required to do that. But they still can’t afford for the workforce to off themselves, which is what more and more people will do as we become progressively more dystopian. So they don’t want you to get better, but they don’t want you to die and stop working (probably why this story got headlines, and why legal euthanasia is rare in the US).
This is why suicide hotlines and mental prisons (“hospitals”) exist. Those are forms of citizen surveillance and control, not mental health treatment. Many red states will detain you, and then dump you at mental institute against your will, regardless of whether or not you have insurance or money to pay for it (and you will have to), simply for choosing to use a suicide hotline. Sometimes they won’t help you until they receive your contact info, so they can dispatch police while they pretend to care about you. The hotlines don’t even use professionals, it’s often just barely-trained volunteers. I’m sure people here will give anecdotal evidence as to why their particular hotline is not the problem…but it is. They all are. This is a system of oppression toward the mentally unhealthy, since we are perceived as too expensive to treat. Do not use suicide hotlines, as they will just make you more suicidal. Seek a therapist or group first.
@@zacky7572 The "less expensive" part mainly applies to Canada. Trudeau and woke activists don't care if the population declines. They think it's better for climate change, and saves money on "free" healthcare.
You're not wrong, but I'm exhausted and nearly completely hopeless.
25+ years of terrible disappointment, pain, and suffering.
I want to hug you so bad :(
Agree. I've been an empty place for 18 years already
Please hold on.
I'm 53, anxiety started for me when i was around 12yo, coupled with chronic depression at 26.
I recovered after 30yo, completely.
I want you to know it's definitely a possibility.
I wanna get a stellate ganglion block injection if I could. Maybe check it out. It's supposedly permanent.
How old are you? Please know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE, I've been in that dark place during many years, I'm not THAT better now but I know for a fact I won't kill myself. I will fight this for the rest of my life if necessary, doesn't matter if I reach the mountain top or not. Just want to feel better before I die
That Dark Souls/Mario analogy was spot on for me (One of the five people who understood it.) Not everyone gets to live their life with powerups and extra lives. Some of us have to crawl on our knees and fight tooth and nail, hoping and praying a bonfire is just around the corner so we don't lose everything we've fought for.
The funny thing is and for anyone that's played Dark Souls before, once you know what to do, things get much, much easier in the game.
Dark souls I think is proof that a lot of times, our most difficult struggles can be overcome. Especially when the solution is as simple as picking the master key, opting for a sorceror build, getting key equipmet by sequence breaking before the first boss.
Even if you've never played a video game before, you can beat a game that is that difficult with the right person guiding you along the way.
Dark Souls taught me that nothing is stronger tha ganking. So co-op always wins.
@@TarTarkus-un9nb
@@TarTarkus-un9nb Such choices make things easier, but lead to a less rewarding journey.
@Gorgonzeye Why make things harder if it's not necessary though?
If you have major personal struggles, solving them as quickly, efficiently and with the least amount of pain is smart.
For Dark Souls, how you start doesn't matter so long as you can grow into being able to tackle what the game throws at you.
Funnily enough darks souls is the one game I go back to when I'm depressed.
That game changed my life.
I'm autistic and also have bpd and depression.
This horrified me because my worst fear of all time is having someone tell me I can never be happy, that there's nothing they can do to help me.
It also cuts straight down to that fear of abandonment that so many bpd folks in particular face.
That you are "not good enough", not worthy of help. It really sucks feeling that way in your own head, so imagine a person who is *supposed* to help telling you this.
forgot to add the cptsd as well haha. point still stands
Unfortunately, this is the reality for most BPD sufferers. I’ve seen a lot of horror stories where mental health “professionals” give up and kick us out the door or give us terrible advice. I’d also went through many, MANY “professionals” who were absolute jokes.
Luckily, after dozens of flops I found one who is wonderful, compassionate, genuinely cares for her patients and actually knows her stuff. Idk what I’d do without her. She was my last attempt at seeking help and I’m so thankful I found her, I was gonna give up trying. I’ve been with her for 10 years, she knows I can’t afford her services and doesn’t even charge me and I’m so grateful. I know I’ll never find another like her.
(CPSTD and BPD tend to go hand in hand btw)
Nobody has the right to tell you that you can never be happy, or that you’re not good enough or that you’re beyond help. Nobody, let alone a medical professional. ❤
I can only try to help you from the standpoint of a dietician. Recent studies have shown rather impressive benefits of a ketogenic diet for people with BPD. Neurological activity running on ketones are much more stable without the spikes and valleys. So i urge you to try either a ketogenic diet you can follow, or simply go carnivore to make it easier but a bit more pricey.
Imagine being the partner. That's equally as scary if not more to have the person you love voluntarily leave you forever.
Last year I was feeling so depressed and sad that everything I could think about was that I didn’t want to live my life anymore. I traveled to a country and spent time in nature, talked to people, made connections, watched the sunset every afternoon and spent a lot of time offline. My depression disappeared and I even forgot to take my medication. That was an amazing experience. When I came back to my “normal” life I felt depressed again. My plan now is to go back and live a slow life close to the nature and this gives me hope.
61 yr grandma here. Yes nature IS medicine. Try grounding? I don't wear shoes if I don't have to. They making 'grounding' shoes now...6 yrs ago I came off big pharma in a horrible way. Docs were no help. Took 2 YEARS before I felt semi normal. Used lots of CBD & weed to get thru the withdrawals. Swore to never go on SSRI's, benzos, opioids & seizure meds ( which I don't have)...ever again. Barely take OTC stuff...still trying to mend my brain & muscles. Nature plays a big part in your recovery.
I hope you succeed at achieving that, our “normal lives” are constructs of modern society rather than how we originally lived ❤
You were most likely lacking in vitamin D. That deficiency can cause severe depression. Kudos to you for not giving up.❤
You were most likely suffering from a vitamin D deficiency. Sunlight and fresh air and nature can really help that. So glad you are feeling better. Fish oil helps too. We are partially products of what we put into our bodies and what we surround ourselves with. As you found out.❤. Wishing you continued recovery and success in your life. 😊
Ah, you give me hope, too.
A majority of my depression definitely comes from not having anything I feel like is worth being alive for. Never really did ever. It's just becoming too much to power through the bullshit that is life without a really good reason. I don't consider simply being alive a good reason.
Especially when the world is one fucking ugly dumpster fire of hate and greed and poverty and perversion.
same, I do feel that
though for me, I went to philosophy for help and learnt many different views towards life
today, i see life as a one-time 70-100 years trial of consciousness, and eventually, I can get it cancelled as I grow old and die and refuse to purchase any subscription to consciousness again after death
I also learn to be comfortable with not living for a reason or purpose, but instead, to just stay seated in the roller coaster ride cause it's a one-time ride.
In fact, in philosophy, having no purpose in life can be seen as a good thing too, because no purpose means no expectations, no disappointments, no regrets. you just start living life for what it is, not for why it is a thing. you will never be thinking about what's next, and constantly chasing things for your whole life, you will be start living in the present
maybe u can try looking into philosophy, which I think is just as important as psychology
That is absolutely false. A majority of depression comes from genetic/biological predisposition to depression, not from negative life experiences.
@@gregorymalchuk272if u dont mind, could you send me the research supporting your statement? im interested in understanding your view
Agreed
"Nobody is qualified to tell you that you are hopeless." 💯 Thank you for being such a powerful voice
This is why recovering addicts are the best counselors.....give me a counselor who has been there every single time. Thank you Dr. Scott for being one of those special ones.
As a mental health professional myself, working with addicts I am appalled, embarrassed, and broken hearted by this story.
That is NOT client centered, has no unconditional positive regard, No compassion!!
Whoever that practioner is they need to leave the profession. 😢😢
We ALL deserve care, compassion.
Absolutely
You know Marsha Linehan was “incurable “, but spent a year with Buddhist monks and came out with DBT as a result!
@aquariusdreaming exactly!! There is something called referral in the profession. That does not always mean to another psychology professional.
you have it completely backwards imo
Please tell the outside world to practice care and compassion because that's where the harm is coming from
This video should go viral. A lot of people need to hear these words 😢
Yes!!!!
Agreed!
And there are just as many people who are sick of hearing them.
It is upsetting that many are calling this a short coming of the doctor who was honest with her about the limits of treatment.
It robs her of her autonomy as it pushes an assumption she is not capable of making this decision.
It is cruel to force people to live if they do not want to.
It’s the ultimate action of free will.
Zoraya’s real story should go viral. Not someone’s opinion based on it’s headline.
@@Desiderata_Ooloihit the nail on its head there 👍🏽.
tfw waking up and realising you didn’t die in your sleep.
Yeah...
And then your chest starts hurting
Feels bad bro 😑
huh?
Yep, some days I’m grateful some days I’m not.
this is why i don’t trust therapists that arent also neurodivergent in some way. neurotypicals will never truly understand you even if you have mild GAD, let alone a personality disorder, autism, or a dissociative disorder. this is fine in most casual relationships, but not doctor patient.
I paused at 8 seconds in..No judgment from me...a fellow mental health sufferer. I, too was in a dark place this morning upon waking. Using all my recently learned skills to reason my way into the day took about two hours. While practicing "wise mind" thinking, I realized that logic was playing no part in my angst - it was all emotion. Yet I have lived with collapsing emotion for so long that it is a huge challenge to balance it with logic. Strength to all of us.
😢keep on swimming 🏊♀️
I've been where the person he's talking about is, and it is so much worse when a doctor says something like that. One thing that helps me day to day is understanding that depression comes with the understanding that we live in an imperfect world. For so many reasons, we feel the pain in this world more keenly. This also means we can live and love more fully, but we need to give ourselves the care and compassion that we simply can't get out of the world. I start my day with gratitude and the prayer that no one should understand the darkness that depression sufferers fight all the time. I've had times when suicide looks like the only answer since I was six, though I rarely soke of it, I thought everyone felt that way. I'm 60 now, and there are times I still feel like that, I have come to understand the harm I would cause people I may not even know. I also have come to learn that we all have a like in us that darkness cannot defeat once we are willing to share it at all costs.
I also woke up today in a very very bad place in my mind, happening more often lately. I’m 40, I used alcohol to deal for 2 decades. Been sober for about 7 years, there were two years during sobriety where I was able to not be depressed and anxious 24/7, however it has been returning, and I often think about both returning to the alcohol or ending it completely. This life is not way. Ever. Even when you put the work in. I exercise, meditate, hike, reflect, try new habits and routines…even with tremendous effort, I wish I were not alive.
@@jimmcd5660 - Like me, we seek permanent answers to questions we may never have asked of ourselves. I asked the questions and found the root causes of my issues. That was the easy part. Undoing and replacing deeply held incorrect beliefs continues to hold me back from a good life. I am not alone. I will not quit.
@@jimmcd5660 i have been through similar feelings and used alcohol for decades too. i found that going to AA meetings caused my depression to get worse (took a long time to make the connection). there's another program called "smart recovery", and it is popular in the EU. it uses CBT and group therapy to challenge our beliefs. hope your day improves. be kind to yourself.
I was told for 20 years there was nothing else that could be done for me. I finally found the right help in my 30s. ❤
Dont believe those lies they told you
cute kitty :)
What was it?
As someone WHO BELIEVES in assisted suicide, for terminal patients, I FULLY agree with you, when you say "The field I'm in has failed this person (mental health), because for a mental health professional to tell someone its never going to get better is beyond malpractice." I explained it that way because I didn't want to make it seem like I was casting a shadow on doctors in any spectrum in trying to describe.
Assisted suicide is literally just eugenics in disguise.
okay… but also, if someone is incapable of surviving by making money to afford food or shelter, then YES their condition is terminal because society has decided they are not worthy of having their base SURVIVAL needs met. and this all revolves around a manufactured monetary system that was created to enforce slavery & the working class.
unless the ROOT issue gets solved, then autistic people, like myself, are just slowly dying and wasting away.
people getting relief to leave is fair. especially if the world doesnt want to help them in any other way… which is doesnt.
Unfortunately assisted suicide is misused the majority of the time 😢
As an autistic and suicidal person, this is absolutely sad. What is wrong with that person who said there was no help left for this lady?
Please hold on. I'm autistic too, so I know that I can be hard.
I'm a psychiatrist and had a relative struggle with self-harm, emotional dysregulation, eating d/o, and multiple hospitalizations as a teenager. It would have been easy to assume she was headed for a life of misery as an adult and that there was no hope. Fortunately, several years ago she got involved in DBT with other teens and has turned her life around. She tends to be a bit anxious, but she's rockin it as a young adult and almost through college. No more self-harm. In a healthy relationship. It's complete B.S. for any psychiatrist or other mental health professional to ever tell a patient/client that there's no hope. Never give up! Life isn't fair and is often difficult, but I honestly believe there's always hope. I had a cousin take his own life about 30 years ago. He never got another chance...
I appreciate you ❤️
Which parent is a narc or ppath? BPD which is a temporary condition only occurs when there is a narc or psychopath with caregiving responsibilities prior to age 12. extremely abnormal external factors are at play with self-harm because mammals are not wired to act against their survival instincts unless extreme measures are needed to protect their survival. A child faced with abuse will take extreme measures to survive and this is what is called BPD.
@@atheistbewildered2987nope
@@atheistbewildered2987 interesting I never heard about that theory about bpd.
It's definitely a theory not fact. @@sandralison7584
People with BPD are frequently told that they cannot be treated. Cluster B personality disorders are highly stigmatized and regarded by professionals as incurable. Not an uncommon experience, actually. BPD is also specifically a disorder that you only develop as a response to trauma, and because autistic people lack the social skills to protect ourselves from predators, we are statistically a lot more likely to be traumatized than the general population. To be honest, as someone with the same set of diagnoses as this woman, I wish I could explain to you all just how awful and hopeless it is. Imagine the only thing you've ever wanted in your whole life is one singular human being who could see you for who you really are without abandoning you, and it never happens. Imagine lacking the social skills to even make a friend like a normal person. You can say that things will get better, but the numbers don't lie, and the average life expectancy of people with a BPD diagnosis is 25, and the second biggest killer of autistic people after seizures is suicid3. These are extremely isolating disorders to live with.
It can get better. Dont give up. Ive fought this shit my whole life. And I refuse to give up, im too goddamn stubborn not to grow, learn, love laugh and leave this world a better place than it was before I came. You can too ❤❤
Same set of problems here. I understand your pain. I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about it a lot. Holding down a job is hard, making and keeping friends is near impossible, life just hits you with one thing after another, trust me I understand.
It sucks, there's no way around it. Psychedelics like ayahuasca and shrooms have helped me move past some of the symptoms. I have cptsd as well from narcissistic and physical abuse growing up. All I can say is to keep moving forwards. That's all you can do. Maybe you can help share your knowledge and experiences with the world to help them heal and grow. That's what I hope to do, but as fate would have it, I found myself stuck at rock bottom.
Keep going. I hope things get better for you. I really do because I know how much things suck.
Is it really a coincidence that in the past ten years we’ve seen a MASSIVE amount of people being diagnosed as autistic, who don’t act/communicate ANYTHING like autistic people?
I can’t help but feel this is big pharma & modern psychology’s new adhd…
Keep here, keep there... It seems like a game about losing instead of keeping: losing your mental stability, losing your ego, losing your dignity. And for what? To live just another day? The only thing I see people tell you to keep is your miserable life.
At these moments only one thing could make the difference: changing your state of life. You can take it away or just change the background, but keeping the same shit over and over, just because people around you can't stand your choice is miserable.
Im giving you a big hug right now.
When I heard that story my first thought was, "have they tried _everything?"_ Have they checked, for example, if she can metabolise the medications she's been given? Have they checked what happens when she takes a tablet? What do her hormones do? Have they checked her brain and her gut for parasites, e.g. the parasite that causes toxoplasmosis? Have they checked for a variety of physical conditions that could cause or exacerbate her depression? Is this an unusual type of chronic fatigue syndrome?
If they haven't checked those sorts of things then, as far as I am concerned, no they haven't checked everything.
I'm not sure what would change if she would be diagnosed with CFS. That's very much the same darkness.
How do you test for the parasites you mentioned? Is it any reliable? :)
i’m so extremely sick of people telling me “it’ll get better”
eh but if you teleported to some random ass country and started over you'd eventually lead a different life. even if you don't, theres no way you'll be the same type of person in a decade from now.
@@mataznuiz you said it
Different life. Not a BETTER life.
What's the point?
That's not what he's saying. He's saying it CAN get better, and don't ever believe anyone who says it can't. I understand and empathize with what you're saying but I think you've taken this video the wrong way. He's not trying to belittle or ignore your problems at all. Anyways, I hope you find happiness, you deserve it
UGH
@@andybreadley429 it very easily could be better
This is why I quit studying mental health. It harmed me and I’ve watched it harm others. What I really need is the ppl who are supposed to care actually show up and care
Facts
Hu?
Nature and kind people making videos on the internet helped me way more than any "professional"
Too many people looking for perfection. What they really should be looking for is authenticity and your true self. Suicide creates a ripple effect that is felt for generations.
why therapists never mention capitalism and all the other unnecessary pressures and obligations in modern society as a possible cause of why many people are giving up?
I mention it to them and that is the easiest way to get them to take their mask off. Haha.
It's something they can't fix individually 🤷♀️ but yeah, this is a big reason why lots of people are mentally struggling
I've been saying this for a long time.
You will make your mental state worse by shifting it onto things you can't change.
It's not like we are slaves.
There is still happiness and freedom to be enjoyed, and you have to work for it as hard as you ever had to in past centuries - you've just been dealt different hands, not worse ones.
Save some money and buy a bicycle.
Go ride up a mountain.
i wanna die too sooo bad but i cant do it myself and euthanasia aint legal here. i wish life could let us do what we love to do without stressing about financial issues but thats not reality there’s no time, too many obligations, the dread of possibly ending up homeless , the joy is fickle. work work work, routine routine routine, status status status, gatekeepers everywhere, capitalist doom, life passes by rapidly you gotta be constantly updated with the new technology and high demand skills and achieve the highest standard to feel entitled to belong somewhere or get things you want in this world, only few energy and hours left, debt debt debt, you’re ugly and broke? good luck , trying to keep up with the million jonenses over the internet, your mind always yelling at u for not doing enough, never feeling enough, considering prostitution and self exploitation to buy some time , every minute is like a death sentence, every minute feels like a regret bomb, time changes but you stay the same, you’re older every minute and you feel helpless and you don’t know how to fix ur self you have no one else but you and you cant figure it out. And if you’re like me, you’ve never ever experienced what having friends is like, or accepting yourself as gay is like, or having sex is like, or being in a relationship is like, or not being free from vices like porn, or connecting with others and you’re close to your thirties and you feel like a major loser and the shame is eating you alive.
For whatever reason it comes to a shock to people that many folks simply don't like participating in the casino/gacha game of Life. It is fine that some like to play, but it is illogical to shame others for not wanting to participate and objectively evil to force them to keep on playing.
Having said that, the only thing the psychiatrist is wrong of is not doing her job properly. Otherwise, the person that was fortunate enough to go out on their own terms had every right to do so. Unless people plan on paying those that want to exit's way through life, people need to mind their own business like they do in nearly every other instance.
Good for her. I’m moving & signing up next.
It is true that we do not know what will happen in the future. I had a rock bottom depressive episode when I was 22. My attempt was unsuccessful thankfully. The years that followed were autopilot. Very little joy even though I was a stay at home mom to 4 children. My turning point began when I was 44 years old. A neighbor needed help feeding his bottle calves. That learning experience changed my life. (I tell my neighbor often that he changed my life.) Now I raise livestock, garden, preserve the harvest, use natural medicine and live life with great joy. I do still have my days when the old me comes back and I see the world with despair. In those days, Dr. Scott, you always have a wise word and I appreciate you.
Your story is truly amazing. I kept thinking about it and sharing it. It is so unpredictable what will make us 'click'. What was in feeding the calves that changed you? Thank you ❤
@@benedettasavitri9644 I think it was mostly that my neighbor ( 3 miles down the road neighbor) was encouraging me, had faith in me that I was of worth. He was teaching me a skill that I never even knew about.
Livestock was something that none of my siblings did. I was the only one out of 6 that did not have a higher education or career. I was a stay at home mom. With the feeding of the calves, it opened a whole new world to me of "homesteading". Now I thrive in it and feel useful to this world.
I know raising 4 children is a very worthwhile achievement, but when society at large pushes higher education, its sometimes hard to find self worth outside of societies pressures.
@@benedettasavitri9644 It was much more that my neighbor found worth in me and taught me a skill I which I did not know about. I do not have higher education like my siblings and felt a little less than. Keeping livestock, gardening, natural medicines are useful skills that I learned by reading and doing. People often ask, "what is my purpose in life?". I have now found that our life purpose changes with time. Not that the new purpose is better than the previous, it's just different. I was once an obedient daughter and good student, then a wife along with raising 4 children. Now I live a rural life, am a helpmate to my husband and look after my aging parents. Someday I will be a grandmother. Life flows, we must learn to flow with it.
That sounds so wonderful, I wish I could visit your farm. I dream of having my own homestead one day. I love animals and feel at peace around them, plus a few kind humans. I've felt depressed at how far out of reach having a homestead feels, especially in the UK where land is expensive and we're not allowed to build homes in the countryside. But maybe there's another way I could do it. Reading your story gave me some hope, thanks for sharing.
If that changed your life then you didn't have it bad at all.
I have struggled with depression for 12 years. All i need is love. Coffee ☕️ and cake are one reason to live for. Every morning for breakfast, one thing to look forward to.
I’m sorry that you have struggled so much. I had to laugh though when I saw “cake” because I’ve thought that too. Well, as long as there is cake🥰🤣
I too stuggle with depression. I find a walk in the morning is great way to deal with it.
Please try some sunshine and vitamin D supplements along with Fish or fish oil supplements. It really works and helped my depression a lot. I can now get through the day. I'm so sorry for your suffering. May you find all of the support you want.💛. Hang in there. Sending you a mental hug. I hope you feel better soon.
That's very sweet. I agree.
You are right even if we can just look forward to our favourite breakfast it means we have hope and hope keeps us alive.
Best Wishes❤
10000% I was told that eating disorders last FOREVER and I knew in my heart that this was false. I worked so hard in so many forms of treatment and I gotta tell you… I’ve been 100% recovered from my eating disorder (that lasted from age 5 to age 25) for almost 5 years!!! I’m so thankful and proud!!! I listened to my intuition which said “that’s false as hell. You can be 100% recovered”
I’m happy for you and so proud of you 👍 Good work, keet it up! I also beat my eating disorder that took many years and feel relieved that it doesn’t control me anymore. Cheers!
@@maryn4150 Thank you! I am so happy for you too. Those disorders are beasts. We are heros for overcoming them. I want everyone struggling to overcome their beasts, too.
And on another note I wish psychologist/psychiatrist and regular folks would stop telling mentally ill folks " It will get better". ..people eventually do get exhausted and fed up. With the system.
yep it makes me no longer want to talk to therapists who keep preaching hope and ignoring the realistic issues in my life
I think it helped me to remember that life is a roller coaster. Some days are very low and some days are very high. Things do get better and they get worse and they get better again.
The worst thing when you're feeling that hopeless is the feeling of being totally alone in it. I suffer from chronic hopelessness, and man, it's hard to not got to the dark place. This post is really shines a light into that darkness. Thank you for taking this very, very painful subject seriously and compassionately.
Your not alone thinking and praying for you x
You should get a bicycle.
A lot of psychiatrist never had depression or OCD, so they do not understand what people been thru. Theory is a good thing but if you've been there and seen there you know what you are talkig about. Thank you dr. Scott for words of wisdom!
Exactly!
I'm a therapist. I've struggled with mental illness my whole life & was raised in utter chaos. Healing what attracted me to psychology and eventually becoming a counselor. Ask your potential counselors if they are humanists and have they struggled depression & see that one ❤ best wishes friends!
My friend struggled with a lot mentally, dealing with depression, attempting to take her own life, coming from an abusive family and having been in a traumatic car accident resulting with PTSD.
She is academically VERY smart. So she got back on her feet, going to Uni to study psychology and she wants to be a counselor. I’m so proud of her for moving forward in life. She is honestly so inspiring and I think she’d be a great counselor . ❤️😊
A mental health doctor once told me there was no medicine no pill that could help someone like me. I left that day in tears.
in a dark souls earth, i pray you may all find a solaire. it’ll be okay
For many it won't be ok
\[T]/
That article is truly heartbreaking. I don't blame you for struggling to find the words to say about it, because there really aren't many. That said, I'm sorry to see you so shaken up like this. It's true that clients should not internalize the inadequacies of the field of mental health, but you shouldn't either. It's frustrating, it's not fair, I'm sure you wish you could speak to this woman right now and help her. But try not to blame yourself for other people's stupid mistakes.
Thank you for making this video. I am tired. I'm tired of working, going to college, doing basic functioning tasks. I'm tired of trying to be okay. I'm tired of suffering so much and not being able to let anyone else into my personal life because they won't understand if I'm honest to them. I'm tired of fighting my demons. I'm tired of feeling so powerless and hopeless. I'm tired of living. It's taking all of my energy to keep myself from doing something reckless. And meanwhile I'm supposed to keep acting like everything is fine because I've learned that there is no space for me to not be fine. My dumb brain just keeps getting worse. Finding someone who I actually feel is capable of reaching me seems impossible. I'm going to keep trying and I'm going to keep living. But I'd be lying if I said I was happy about it. If anyone relates to this, I'm sorry. Just know you're stronger than you think you are.
You are strong as well!
I relate and I'm so sorry ❤
I can relate also and I hope you can find relief!
I feel you... I'm so tired also. Was just thinking earlier how I wish there was some place I could go to be put to sleep. No family.. No friends. While my mind deteriorates more and more, I'm petrified of becoming a ward of the state. Just put me to sleep.
I feel you... Fighting depression, anxiety and Bpd.. It's hell on earth... I barely have energy to do basic stuff.. I wear a mask that I am OK while I am not.. Sometimes I wish I could scream myself out... Just scream and let all of that out of... Wish all of that ends one day for all of us..
Appreciate you calling a spade a spade. A great deal of "calling out" the mental health corporation/cult is indicated.
Dr. Scott, you're the best doctor in the world. My story: I have had extreme suicidal thoughts & ideations in my 20s and now I'm in my 30s, things have been going through alot in my life not having parents (mom & dad) for 34 years of my life. I'm about to be 34 yrs old this year in June 22nd, 2024. And your advice really helped me out deeply and genuinely, because we are living in a world that's chaotic & full of madness. I have been having alot of mental health issues throughout my life, I have to be grateful that I have a support team, family & friends and my gaurdians that are on my side whether its good or bad circumstances. So thank you so very much my superhero, Dr. Scott Eilers. You're The Best Doc!!!!❤🕯😥🖤
I'm invisible now. I have no dreams
Trouble is, when you go to the doctors feeling grim, all they do is load you up with anti-depressants (which I don’t take, so I have to just struggle on with no support). I’m an older person with no family, no friends, no children and who lives in a town where no-one cares about people enough to extend the hand of friendship. My neighbour is a priest who stands at the pulpit on Sundays spouting ‘love thy neighbour’ but whose family never even says “hello”. My future looks as bleak as this woman’s.
Sending you so much love ❤️ you seem like an amazing person, I'd have loved to hang out with you if I were your neighbour
Maybe psychedelics will work better for you than traditional antidepressants
I'm in the same boat...I never married, 60 years old, no relatives bcoz i am an orphan, very little friends, suffering daily pain due to bladder pain syndrome. I am tired of daily suffering. Not worth living.
You are going to be OK. Hugs
@@calsonyap8337 Perhaps Google Marek Jantos. He is an Australian Pain Specialist, particularly Urogenital pain: bladder etc. I saw him for Vulvadynia (pain during intercourse). Marek travels the world speaking at medical conferences. BTW, he was not born in Australia so don't expect an Australian accent LOL. Marek knows his stuff, believe me! All the best 🤗
I've been in therapy of one sort or another for decades. Some was useless, some was harmful, and some helped a little bit. My current therapist offers sympathy and little else. Her favorite saying is "that must be hard for you", but there is no practical help offered to make my struggle easier. Your videos have been more helpful than any of the therapists I've had. Please keep making them, and thank you for caring enough to try to help.
Yes it’s incredibly frustrating! One of my therapists even said to me I was very good at being a therapist myself. Perhaps I was trying to compensate! 😂
That's exactly what therapy was like for me. That's why I don't go anymore. 🤦♀️
I can help myself better than they ever could
@@ciera4935 it's rubbish
I feel worse afterwards
That is not a good therapist. Jeesh.
If you want concrete advice, tell them that you want concrete advice. Tell them in no uncertain terms and keep asking for it. If you don't do this, they will err on the side of caution, because thier ethics prohibits them from telling you what to do, and concrete advice walks that thin line that many therapists are afraid to cross.
Bad mental health care left me with essentially untreatable PTSD. I was 11 years old. It's been almost 40 years, and what those doctors did has just got worse.
I’m so sorry
I had situational stress but a good life, all the ingredients had I taken time out and utilised them
Psychiatry has ruined my brain and life. Those meds have dos sled me and changed my ability to function. Lost everything including my family and career
I studied psychology in college and gave up my career in psychology because I have bipolar disorder. Bipolar Disorder in America is extremely expensive to manage.
People giving up because they're not getting better shouldn't be flooded with begging that they stay and continue to suffer.
I'm in my 30's, I've had 2 attempts, I've been seeing specialists since I was 17, was diagnosed after college, and I've yet to get better. Life is too expensive for someone impoverished. I tried to get more from my education, but my brain can't keep up with anything academic anymore. I tried to keep to my jobs and work hard, now I'm unemployed, applying to jobs nearly every day, and remain jobless.
I do think about giving up everyday, and after so many years of suffering and not improving, it would piss me off to hear such a tone deaf take where hope is the only "reason" to not throw the towel.
If not for my dog and me being responsible for him, I would have already, knowing that not everyone gets the happy ending they deserved, no matter how hard they tried, and everyone in the field should acknowledge this before saying that things get better when in some cases it actually doesn't.
I have been told by my psychiatrist that there is nothing else they can do for me. I have major depressive disorder that seems to be treatment resistant. I have tried so many different medications and treatments. I cannot seem to get out of this!! I fight every day all day just to survive! I understand why she chose this route. When I think of living the rest of my life this way I think why bother!
Dr. Scott your words mean a lot to someone like me! Please keep doing what you are doing you give me the hope to keep going even when I’m exhausted and ready to give up! Thank you
Hi Rebecca. I'm sorry you're going through this. Please try the carnivore diet, just for a month. I know it sounds insane, but just give it a shot. There is no reason not to. I don't know how to inspire you, so please search "carnivore depression" on youtube and just listen to these vids.
@@HunxRepairgreat comment! I've been carnivore for 20 months now. I haven't gotten off my meds, but I do feel that it helps my head a great deal. I still have a lot of problems to deal with. And I'm still a trauma survivor, with an ACE score of 7 which does affect me everyday. But I am so happy to be living the carnivore lifestyle and it does keep me on a more even keel emotionally and I feel so much less physical pain and illness than I did before. I was thinking that I wish this woman that Scott is talking about could be guided to the carnivore diet and decide to give it a try before giving up.
Try micro dosing mushrooms? Try weed? Weed saved my life.
@@chifreak6I learned that antidepressants kind of neutralize psilocybin mushrooms. So people that are on an antidepressant won't experience the same high that someone who is not on an antidepressant will if they were to use psilocybin. A caveat some people don't know about. And I agree that cannabis is good for helping me sleep and taking the edge off if I'm too anxious or stressed.
@@therealdeal3672yes this is true, and it breaks my heart. The people that most need mushrooms can't get their benefits, due to them being on srris. I've been stuck on antidepressants for many years despite many attempts to ween off. :(
Im 35 with Autism, BPD, PTSD, Depression, and severe anxiety. Been there many times....😢 poor girl.
Wow sidenote: Ive had 2 or 3 therapists tell me they couldn't treat me or werent qualified enough. Soon as I mention BPD they dont want to deal with me. Ive had zero help for the worst diagnosis I have. Been in patient suicidal at facilities 3x.
*Im a 28 year old man and ive also lately been seriously considering and also trying to build up the guts to 3nd my life.*
The world of psychiatry and mental health need more professionals like you. Thank you.
Honestly I find that most of the MH professionals I have met don't care. And I have worked in many areas of the MH field
I am one of those hopeless cases on whom the mental health care system has utterly given up. However I am now in the middle of a spontaneous remission. I am super happy and I have found a reason to live. The turnaround was not totally spontaneous. I had to kick.some bad people out of my life, but I got better. I feel this video. Thank you for this apology. It means a lot to me.
Cool!
I pray your remission is permanent
Friends, family, accountability, avoiding alcohol, avoiding illegal drugs, and repitition of good habits every day. Its the only way. But you can do it!! I'm living proof! I was seen as severe, out of control. In my teens I was an absolute wreck and a danger to myself and others.
Now I've been on meds consistantly for 8 years, I make mindful evaluations of my feelings and thoughts at all times, I focus on my goals and make notes to check on the people I love (autism and adhd makes it hard to keep track without a diary). My BPD is in remission, but I still never forget or deny that I HAVE it. I take accountability for every one of my feelings and actions
I am 67 years old.
I have been in the mental Health System since 1989..
I been treated like shit by the Mental Health System.
I am not just saying this to get Brownie Points from YOU.
BUT,
You have changed my whole life to one of being more active, positive and especially not to give up..
I know I depending a long time on Dr's ect that only had book knowledge.
Your experience has made all the difference.
If this lady could listen to You.
I know YOU could give her hope.
GOD bless you to be so concern about a lady really in a terrible crisis..
U ever been on medications?
That’s happened tome, a long time ago and I’m still struggling. ‘We can’t do any more for you’. ‘They’ were useless. So good to hear about this.
Even living a day at the bottom of the dark pit of despair is absolutely backbreaking
I cried during this episode. It really hit me hard. I saw this on FB this week and my first thought was, "I can do that?" I'm 53 and have been depressed all my life. My hope is extremely minimal. In my mind, the only thing keeping me alive is my 14 year old daughter and what it would do to her if I died. Dr Scott, your videos have helped me more than you can possibly know. I so wish that you were in Canada so I could see you. Instead, I just bought your book and can't wait to read it. Thank you, Dr Scott, for all you do.
His book is excellent. He communicates so well with you because he has been there. Its like having an understanding friend holding your hand not a psychotherapist talking from miles away. I hope his book helps you like it helped me.
@@susanhills8015 Thank you! I will start it today. I'm glad that it was able to help you ❤️
i feel you, friend. 🤍
I hear you. I’m almost 55 and have been battling depression and low self-esteem probably most of my life, and it stems from living with my mother’s mental illness and her subsequent suicide when I was 11. I just got on with life and took over caring for the house and my sister, but now I realize I never got over the loss. There’s always a void. Your daughter does need you more than you know. More than she may know now. She’ll appreciate you when she’s 30 if she’s going through any of that pre-frontal cortex coming online awkward teenage stuff. Have you tried something like mushroom gummies or capsules? Seems to take the edge off. Sending you love and hugs!
@@mjrussell414 I'm sorry about your mom. After the divorce, mine was never around so I also took over caring for my brother and sister. I was 10. I thought about mushrooms. There's a clinic here that offers mushroom therapy, but it costs $4000!
The mental health system has failed so many of us. It is a struggle to get the right care. I’ve been fighting to find proper treatment for a myriad of disorders and many times theres been therapists who say i’m “too complex” for them. I’ve had to fight tooth and nail to be taken seriously, let alone receive proper treatment to help my mental health issues.
Yeah, but it's not really a problem of just mental health system. In every profession are people like this one therapist mentioned in video, that do wrong decisions. Doctors especially.
Do you smoke weed?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm autistic but in India nobody cares.
I was diagnosed 2 years ago with ADHD and autism. It made me start a journey of recovery from crippling depression. After 2 years I finally got an appointment with a psychiatrist with a view to him taking over the ADHD treatment plan that had already been put in place but I had moved house. Instead he told me (after a 1 hour session in which he took a case history but didn't ask me anything about my symptoms) he told me that he was not accepting my diagnoses (that involved around 12 hours of assessment over 6 sessions and where specific to diagnosis of particular conditions) and he would not be carrying out the treatment plan and would instead be referring me to psychotherapy 'in the hope that they will offer you an appointment' even though I have been having psychotherapy, that I pay for, weekly for the last 3 years. So now I am back to square one and can feel myself spiraling again
Some of us were given a lousy start at life and never could make right with it since. Sometimes you just get tired of the fight. I am tired of fighting. Some of us are just not meant for this world. To much struggle for one lifetime
It is awfully cruel to tell anyone they're beyond hope. To hear it is horrible. To believe it is even worse. A little compassion would go a long way.
People with BPD frequently lie about, or at least distort, 'negative' things that have been said to or done to them, in order to portray themselves as the 'victim'. . .with the intent that those who've upset them will face some kind of assault.
There's a good chance that the doctor(s) probably told her that UNLESS she changes--takes a conscious, proactive approach to finding her well-being--she is beyond hope.
Thanks for this Dr Scott. My (ex) psychologist once told me if im not going to do the work he wanted me to do with his deadlines, he couldn't help me and nobody else could. He practically broke up with me. Gave up on me. I ended up in a mental clinic not long after. I met my current psychologist there. He was willing to help me hang on until i was ready and had the strength to do the work. But for a long time he was just there, helping me to just keep living. And that was what I needed.
As someone diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, OCD, and BPD (and suffering with something akin to chronic depression), I've been told the exact same by a psychiatrist. I left his office crying and having a complete meltdown. He didn't even attempt to comfort me. I already hadn't seen a future for myself in years - and that man obliterated any little hope could've had. I heavily considered throwing myself in front of a car on my way back home multiple times.
Please don’t let someone else define you. You have a special, beautiful brain. Take care to figure out what you uniquely need. Sometimes “helpers” can be very abusive. Guard your heart.
Know that there are people who truly care, no matter how few. Persist. If only to prove them wrong. That might have to do for awhile.
@@maryk4588 Wonderful answer Mary. True and loving.
I actually found out about this woman because I got long covid and started reading about chronic fatigue. While society focuses on the most fortunate people like her fighting poorly researched life-destroying diseases don’t get any support until it’s way too late. I appreciate the effort you’ve taken by releasing this video. Some of us really need it.
The fact that this was the first video on my for you page is almost a bit spooky. I’m 29, I have autism and BPD and recurring episodes of depression and I really wasn’t having a very good time tonight to put it mildly and this video kind of shocked me out of my downward spiral. So thanks! I agree, never give up hope. For every time I almost checked out because I thought everything was awful and I’d never be happy again there’s great memories that came afterwards, really important people in my life I never would have met and amazing experiences I never would have had otherwise. As the great philosopher Jimmy Buffet said “some of it's magic, some of it's tragic. But I had a good life all the way.”
I think most often it’s not necessarily the mental health community or professionals that let people down, but rather modern society and expectations. As someone with depression and persistent existential dread, I find it difficult to be a functional and productive contributing member of society. What does that lead to? Possible job loss, possible long periods of time between jobs, having and earning less money to pay for rent and food and medical services and therapy… it’s hard enough to live with any kind of illness, but add adulting on top of that and just surviving financially, that’s when it becomes impossible to want to keep living. Rent and gas prices don’t wait for you to get better. Neither do most relationships, realistically.
Just don't give up so that the government has the chance to milk you for your tax money.
Exactly! You have no choice but to struggle. I’ve been on both ends.. having money but no time to do anything and not having money which means anxiety with bills and rent and getting kicked out. There is no winning and not to mention being a gifted child but ending up being a failure without a job.
I've always been grateful to live in the Netherlands for what I thought were extremely tight regulations around assisted suicide for painful physical terminal illness. This news changes everything. I am currently on community crisis support because I was caught preparing to take my own life a month ago. It was the second time in 3 years. Fast forward to yesterday, a gynaecologist put me firmly in perimenopause, and told me that what I've been experiencing is extreme, but understandable given my age. Little social support meant I didn't put 2+2 together until it was nearly too late. My thyroid plus reproductive hormone profile are largely responsible. Neither were caught by my general practitioner: I had to do the research. I'm afraid this young woman has things going on that have never been caught, and that scares me. My life changed yesterday as a result of bloodwork and a good community crisis team. Like you, this news has hit me hard. I'm tempted to tell local Christians to keep an eye out for her.
I’m so happy for you that you’re on the road to recovery!
God has nothing to do with mental health. If anything, when we created Him, it made things worse.
What's a community crisis team?
Gambling addict here, I was told that I wasn’t “trying hard enough” to be sober. I attempted to take my life to stop the financial damage I caused to my loved ones, bc no matter how much I tried, it wouldn’t stop. It is madness.
Life is a struggle. I keep my demons - thoughts I cannot control but I can cope with- at bay at every moment of every day, through the little things in life. I cling onto any relief from my brain constantly telling me I am better off gone.
The last thing anyone needs is to be stepped down even more by crappy “professionals” in the field.
When I was 38, about 15 years ago, I was diagnosed with Avascular Necrosis of both hips and needed them to both be replaced. The surgeon botched my first replacement and lied to me about it for years. I as in tremendous pain and no one would believe me. A pain doc sat me down and suggested that the pain was all in my head. It almost broke me, but I decided that he doesn't get to say that. He doesn't get to fail like that when it comes to me. Here I am, fifteen years later, and I know why it hurt and I feel complete again because of therapy.
All I every needed to hear was don't worry I've got you 😢
Don't worry, I've got you. I'll be praying for you every day. Please don't neglect yourself and please try vitamins D and B1 and fish oil supplements and CBD oil. Try everything before you give up. You can do it! I'm rooting for you. You are not alone ❤❤❤
I don’t know you, but I got you, too. Know that there’s at least two of us out there praying for you. ❤
I just prayed for you again. You'll get through this. We've got your back. If you ever need to vent just message one of us. Sorry for everything you are going through.:-(
😭Thank you so much to everyone who reply to my message god bless 🙏 nice to know of the lovly people out there xx
@@deborahbull5968 God bless you too sweet one. Keep hanging in there 💛😇
I was depressed since i was a child, bullied, went to a special school. I had 2 abortions under pressure, 1 healty son and 4 miscarriages. Was bullied again in the hospital where i worked when i had the 4 miscarriages, worse. I'm not saying this because i want pity. But because i was so depressed that i was suicidel, for a long time. Not seeying any light, not even my son because i felt so dark. Now i'm so much better because i take care of myself, i care about myself! I felt nobody understood me. Not a medium, psycholigist, medication etc helped me. I did the work, hard work and have compassion for myself. PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP!!!❤
Yes, this!! I was diagnosed with clinical depression after being depressed all my life, disabled since birth. God told me the meds would not help. Stopped taking them and worked on myself. This is how you get healed. If you have peace with God and yourself, that is what matters most.
I had my first panic attack when I went to college at a foreign country. Went to see the school counselor, who basically told me "it doesn't get better" and that I need to "get over it". Had a couple more breakdowns after that and then had to drop out of school, and most of that period of time are still missing chunks in my memory. I failed at getting over it, and those words I was told that day still haunts me today, ten years later.
I really needed to hear this. I’m at a point in my life where I’m just standing still watching the world pass me by. I’m disabled, I’m legally blind, autistic I have lupus and hEDS and am a stage 4a uterine cancer survivor. My parents are in their 70s and are my care givers. I get $500 a month from disability which is not even close to what I need for my special diet for my illnesses, other necessities and bills. My parents are on a very limited strict budget having to help care for me. This month is particularly tight financially. I just keep thinking maybe they’d be better off if I weren’t weighing them down. I have such low self esteem that I can’t even begin to imagine what I could do to help out bringing more money in.
Hearing this though really made me feel some hope for the future that I’ll think of something to better our finances.
IFS (Internal Family Systems Therapy),and DBT (dialectical behavior therapy ) are really excellent for borderline treatment. Hope for the hopeless! ❤
And autism, DBT helped manage meltdowns and emotions
There are people that cannot afford help and just want the suffering to stop. There are people that want help and are denied help, gaslit by therapists and medical professionals and told “it’s getting nice out, go take a walk”~DO medical doctor-WI, told how “inconvenient” testing is because “it would required multiple office visits to take the tests and therapy and meds will help” tells you they’ll email you therapists but never emails you~ PhD, IL or how helpful tests would be, that “often they’re done when there is a complicated history or let’s say services are needed in the home or school” and doesn’t recommend anything, the conversation just ends right there ~ therapist, IL. Some of these people are adults looking to be diagnosed, affirmed and supported and can’t or aren’t. It’s like an intentional block, a far fetched service some don’t have access to. Some people don’t have supports. Some people get worn out, they just don’t know what else to do. It’s sad.
it’s kinda hellish, if i’m honest.
@@lisalasersI'm sorry. I hope you're able to access everything you need to feel better soon. I'm sending you healing vibes your way. Also try vitamins D and B1 and fish oil supplements. They've been proven to help depression,or at least make it tolerable. Works for me. Hopefully everything works out for you. Please don't give up. Keep on fighting. ❤
@@StubbornclarityHUUUEEGG I just remembered Gonesh's lavender incense sticks! I like to smoke up a room with them and listen to calming music! Oh, I'm so excited!
I believe….even though I feel extreme sadness for this woman…she does have the right to choose when to go…
I say that as someone who also suffers from severe mental health issues, especially my ocd.
I unfortunately had a suicide in my family - happened the same day that I was doing research for myself even hours before hearing the news.
I couldn’t do it after that- I saw the aftermath. It was surreal. The thing that really kept me going was my little dog, who had faced trauma himself. I kept going for him.
In a way- I am disturbed. This poor woman, her therapist, doctors, support system…just to be basically told “sorry can’t help ya, shits fucked” and pretty much pushed to death. It feels…it feels like people who are neurodivergent are being pushed to go this route cuz society refuses to really acknowledge them and help create a better environment for everyone.
I wish this world wasn’t like this…
🫂
I don't like her choice, but it's her choice. I can respect that.
Doc told me yesterday that it will never get better and I need to learn to accept it.
I had a similar situation with a "doctor" who gave up on me without truly being a part of my I guess rehabilitation. That was in 2016. I recently almost committed suicide, and during my leave of absence from work I did the rest of the deep, completely heartbreaking soul searching. These days, I'm renewed but apprehensive when another depressive episode wants to start up. I've always just waited it out. As someone who's been completely alone and on their death bed before (I have physical health issues), I still say life is worth living. Do I always feel that way? No. But we know better than our STUPID emotions 😂❤
There's a song by Coldplay from there parachutes album talks about life is worth living
My State has "death with dignity" for people diagnosed with certain terminal conditions, but not for mental health issues. Thanks for sharing your experiences and words of hope.
They don't even empower those dealing with mental illness to live with dignity...we should try that first ❤
@@EdnaBeLurking Vermont
Why the discrimination?
@@tslinger21because mental health still isn’t taken as seriously as physical health.
@@tslinger21 Because terminally ill patients are actually in their right mind when they make their decision. This is coming from someone with Depression, GAD, ADHD, ODD and BPD before you come after me
Love the pane of glass analogy because that’s how depression feels - like a barrier. Like your perspective on life is closed off and you aren’t truly experiencing things. Meaning and hope are lost. You aren’t living anymore, in a sense. What’s the point in going on when you feel like that? But I can say, as someone with Bipolar disorder, that your perspective on the world and yourself can DRAMATICALLY change based on how your brain is functioning. Whether you’re depressed, manic, anxious, etc. - it’s physiological. If the cause can be addressed or at least the symptom itself, then it is possible to achieve a more stable life.
For the years I was depressed prior to having my first upswing and receiving my diagnosis, I truly thought things were hopeless. Experiencing mania turned things 180 degrees and gave me an identity crisis. I didn’t even know what “normal” meant. But with medication I feel so much more stable and in control! I feel “normal.”
I hope whoever is struggling mentally finds a doctor that prioritizes getting to the root of the issue and addresses it properly. The world is processed through your own mind and you deserve to experience things from a healthy point of view.
The one thing that gave me a renewed spark of life and hope despite abysmal treatment by the mental health system was this epiphany: no one is coming to save me. I had to make a decision at this point whether to love myself enough to understand that the people I entrusted with my health did not have the tools to do their jobs (hmmm, much like an emotionally immature parent; funny/not funny how strong a parallel that is).
I managed to get out of community mental health altogether and started seeing a therapist that specializes in abuse recovery. Now I’m doing much better, as I’m no longer expending energy on explaining basic concepts like trauma competency to those whose only interest is to cover up iatrogenic harm and engage in outdated “best practices” that serve no one.
For many of us, it's very difficult to continue to hang on because it seems that nothing we do makes things better. People forget that depression is often a terminal disease. It hurts. I do hope this young woman finds someone somewhere who will help her hang on, but I know the feeling of just wanting the pain to stop. It's a daily fight.
Mario life vs Darksouls is exactly it! Another strong and reassuring video as always 💯
NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER GIVE UP YOU CAN WIN THAT VICTORY ROYALE
As someone with severe BPD, CPTSD, anxiety and ADHD...this video moves me in all the way. It's awful. I feel so sorry for her, why would any doctor say such 🐂💩.
That "professional" should be persecuted for that. That's not euthanasia. That's not assisted suicide. That is manslaughter in my opinion. Horrible. Absolutely horrible.
I'm really crippled due to my medical conditions and yet...giving up life isn't an option. I won't change the tiny moments of joy for... nothingness.
With all due respect, Scott, I never fully trusted advice from anyone in the medical field, let alone my therapist. I wish everyone could develop that skill. Your words are appreciated.
Well, yes, it is important to remember that the most critical part of mental health treatment is the internal work. At the end of the day, you have to work on yourself, with yourself. Teach a man to fish.
This is an underated thing.
I was made into a prescription addict because I listened to the doctor's advice as a teen. That woman neglected my severe side effect and refuse to offer anything more than med. I got toxicated twice and every psychiatrist just switched pills. Zero help on helping you to reduce the intake. Now I know the farmacal companies taught them to produce addicts. I tried on my own it didn't work dispite I'm a stong willed person who survived and solved lots of other impossibles.
Anyone on early stage, please don't trust anyone.Try to get help but just try.Don't grap them as a savior even though I know it's their fault to pray on the most vulnarable
This is a nice young man but he doesn’t accept you can not always fix it. I have fought depression for 30 years (am 68 now). I do all I can - psychiatric practitioners for meds, good psychologists, re-reading my positive notes, exercise, and way more. I’ve talked myself out of ending it a 1000 times. Last summer my first bipolar “manic” episode, two weeks I have no memory of and 5 days in hospital. Came out with lesser issues now, but blissfully no depression at this time. And I finally forgave myself for being unable to “just get over it”. Best to all of you.
I hear ya 🖤
I've suffered from severe mental illness since I was 4 years old. It hasn't got better and I have accepted that it won't. I'm 25 now. I have just had to deal with it. Every time I have any sort of thoughts that are suicidal or related to self harm I have trained myself to immediately push them away. It does rub me the wrong way when people who work in Psychology try to claim that we can get better if we actually can't.
Try eating healthier food and work out, then read the bhagavad gita
@@coco-ongelzelaah yes, eating healthy food and working out, something they said they already tho. Nice
Dr Scott, you are such an amazing human being. The selfless giving of your professional/personal gifts and compassion to us so freely as you do, is beyond priceless. I’m choking back tears as I listen to the last few minutes of your message. I have both you and God in my corner, I can’t go wrong. Thank you SO much for what you do. I pray God continues to bless your life beyond measure.
Still Imagine mental health care that forces you (as an adult) to be involuntary trapped in mental hospital for 3 months under a threat of violence like tying to bed, getting treated like criminal and deliquent because your depression got so bad that you have tried to die even though you never posed any threat to another person, never been agressive, never commited a crime. most traumatising, vile and dehumanizing experience regarding mental health and since experiencing that I regret every single day that I woke up in Icu instead of dying, every single day for years.
Appalling. I’m a psychotherapist, and I’m speechless. I’m seriously speechless. I’ve written a lot of words only to erase them, there’s nothing that can be said to cover the disrespect I feel towards this “psychiatrist” (my predictive text kept trying to use psychopath). Seeking help by choosing to enter therapy is a difficult endeavor. It’s a journey that challenges the mind, spirit and soul. Ugh, I can’t go on writing because you said it best. I pray she’s saved.
Lots of sadists and authoritarians in ANY profession in which clients or students are supplicants or can be subdued by legal force improperly exercised. PSYCHIATRY has ALWAYS been one if the worst of these havens for pathological adults to harm both children and adults, often wrecking their lives.
Did you bother to take the time to read beyond the conservative American headlines? Did you even look up who this young woman is, how many years of counselling and how many different therapists she’s had? You’re not worth calling yourself ‘psychotherapist’, you’re only worth the title ‘know-it-all’.
@@tslinger21 I’m not sure what you mean. Where’s your defensiveness coming from? Those are strong words, what are you implying?
@@tslinger21 There's breakthroughs happening right now as we speak in psychedelic therapy.
If ir does't matter anyways she should at least try that on her own. Who cares, it doesn't matter if it's illegal, if she's planned to die anyways.
Adopt a pet for a few weeks, or take care of a toddler or elementary school kid for a day (because kids are the embodiment of. hope and potential)
Move somewhere else where the system is not as cruel. At least travel to a warm country and leave work for a sabbatical for a month. Enjoy the sun. Fuck all that. She needs to experience a live outside of the sickening hamster wheel that is our western civilization.
THEN if she did all those things and they didn't even bring her a glimmer of hope, not even a tiny bit of hope for joy in her live, then she can say she tried everything.
@@hubbysswee what I mean is that professionals shouldn’t jump to conclusions on the basis of reading a headline. As you and dr. eilers do. You obviously don’t have a clue about Zoraya’s story, or about Dutch legislation. Read up, then come back.
The meds have failed me, the doctors have failed me, but I'm not giving up. Therapy hasn't and exercise hasn't. Ty for making this. 😪
Can you please try vitamin D and B1? Fish oil has been proven by scientists to assist with anxiety and depression. I tried it and it helped me. Along with sunshine. I was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder. Adding these things to my diet helps me a lot. Bonus is no side effects but maybe fish burps. Lol. But I was desperate to try anything!
I had a similar situation. It’s taken a ton of experimentation, but I’d recommend yoga and meditation. Especially meditation! Even for 10 mins a day. It’s been a game changer for me. May you feel better soon and enjoy life to the fullest 💗
@@StubbornclarityAll B makes me super anxious and angry but i know b and b1 is important. Thanks for the D reminder
@@sarahjaye4117 oh! That's interesting. About the b vitamins. Maybe u should just get them from food. But I'm glad that at least you can try the D. Good luck 🍀 with everything. I hope everything gets better for you really soon. I'm taking vitamin D and calcium and fish oil and it helped with the depression and bone loss as I age. Here's hoping things get better soon for both of us💛
Sometimes at night I think to myself, “man, I’m glad to be alive”. It’s not always like that, but I’m glad that I stuck through the worse parts of my life to make it to the better parts.
This makes me so angry because 28 was the turning point of my rock bottom. I have similar diagnoses to her and struggled with thoughts of suicide almost daily. The difference is I absolutely refused to give up on myself no matter how many horrible days I had. I also refused to take the advice of others that said it never gets better. I did years of research and started taking care of myself more, got a physical job, took supplements, ate better, drank more water, and finally I challenged my thoughts and changed them. It took years to unlearn all the BS in my head but I did it and I rarely have bad days now. It’s incredible how far I’ve come and if I can get through the crap my mind and body put me through most of my life, I strongly believe lots of other people can too. It’s not easy, but it is worth it on the other side.
Life is worthless without hope, no reason to get out of bed everyday
Please do it one day at a time I'm thinking and praying for you xx
@@deborahbull5968 No, let somebody go if they want to go. Especially if they're a criminal, hypothetically. And there's only physics, no dieties.
I agree laura. Life needs to be tolerable on some level before one ought to live in it. Some of these people here would gladly live while constantly suffering agonizes, and claim YOU should do the same! Clowns!
There is someone that will be devastated if you pass away, whether it's in real life or its your online community of friends. Please keep hope alive!
Reason why I stopped caring about dating or working
I've been here. A therapist told me they couldn't do anything. I knew it all. That led me to the most amazing therapist who DID help me. I feel so much better than I did. It isn't hopeless. It feels it but it isn't. ❤
Another issue is that when you tell someone who is ready to die that "you can be helped, but it is the hardest thing you'll ever have to do" they may be even more ready to go. I have felt this before. I was literally done, and if you had told me, already so exhausted, that all I had to do was "the hardest thing ever" it would have been enough to check out.
In my case of chronic depression and anxiety, after suffering for 30 years the solution turned out to be intense meditation retreats, looking deeply at my sensations and seeing thoughts as thoughts, and sensations as sensations (haha, yes a lot of work).
Well that along with taking NAC and glycine to restore glutathione levels in the body devastated by constant fight or flight stress responses and never ending DP/DR. I think low glutathione is a dramatically overlooked cause of chronic depression. It is a self perpetuating vicious cycle.
As much as as I want to believe when people say it will get better, it’s simply unrealistic. There’s no possible way everyone can get better. If you’ve been depressed for 10 or 20+ years in and out of inpatient facilities, therapy, out patient, medication, alternative treatment, etc. It would be stupid to think they just haven’t found the right person to help them. People know when they can’t keep going, however I do think professionals telling people they will never get better is wrong, if someone who went to school to “help” people & studied hundreds/thousands of hours says they can’t help you, how will that make someone who’s already down feel?
I struggle with social anxiety, depression, disordered eating, and OCD. I’m a shut-in (hikikomori) I can’t leave my house, no job, can’t study, for someone like me there’s really no hope. Accessing treatment is hard even if you have a job but if you’re unemployed it’s impossible, some people are helpless. Let’s accept it.