10 MOST COMMON ETIQUETTE MISTAKES | Do Not Do This!

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  • Опубліковано 25 тра 2024
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    #etiquette #jamilamusayeva #etiquettemistakes
    Hi,
    I am Jamila Musayeva, an international social etiquette consultant and the author of two books "Etiquette: the least you need to know" and "Afternoon Tea Etiquette." My books are available in English language in print only. If you wish to order, please email info@jamilamusayeva.com or my website: jamilamusayeva.com/order-books
    In this video, you will learn about 10 most COMMON etiquette mistakes that many people are guilty of.
    My Social Media:
    Instagram: / jamila_musayeva
    TikTok: / jamila_musayeva
    Website: jamilamusayeva.com/
    Email: info@jamilamusayeva.com
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,4 тис.

  • @danieljellers
    @danieljellers 3 роки тому +772

    Classic etiquette and good manners are timeless. But occasionally, in our fast-casual society, we need gentle reminders.

  • @user-el3up3jr8g
    @user-el3up3jr8g 3 роки тому +1792

    Can we get a dressing etiquette ? I see people wearing anything on any situation 😣

    • @sonalideshmukh4484
      @sonalideshmukh4484 3 роки тому +22

      Good idea 👍

    • @kimplung8250
      @kimplung8250 3 роки тому +127

      Agree! Omg- I came to so many events, trying hard to dress up properly and most people wore casual on basically any occasion. I don't know what to wear anymore.

    • @meghnamathew7094
      @meghnamathew7094 3 роки тому +12

      try anna bey's channel

    • @wanda12411
      @wanda12411 3 роки тому +32

      Church is a big one.

    • @tresaduckworth1200
      @tresaduckworth1200 3 роки тому +24

      Yes! Dressing over 40 would be nice too!

  • @iamarnesh68
    @iamarnesh68 3 роки тому +334

    Her face really reflects coolness and lot of manners and etiquettes. Really master in her work.

  • @kowen3377
    @kowen3377 2 роки тому +124

    As my grandmother used to say about drinking tea "the higher the pinkie, the lower the class". So true.

  • @gintarezvinkliene5018
    @gintarezvinkliene5018 3 роки тому +1191

    Hello, can You make a video about how to react to rude people? Or people who try to hurt, attack or humiliate other person? Love your videos ❤️

    • @lenkacorlannova9346
      @lenkacorlannova9346 3 роки тому +35

      Exactly what I would be interested in, too! 🙂

    • @girlhappy6442
      @girlhappy6442 3 роки тому +14

      Yes great idea 👌🏻

    • @excxmoody
      @excxmoody 3 роки тому +32

      Agreed. I always try my hardest not to even respond but when it happens over years and years, cannot help but at some point give those that dish it out the same medicine.

    • @magdaforwomen2
      @magdaforwomen2 3 роки тому +6

      She did that in a video addressing rude comments

    • @gintarezvinkliene5018
      @gintarezvinkliene5018 3 роки тому +13

      @@magdaforwomen2 I know. I mean when you talk directly to people. Work, friends, family and so on

  • @nashmianorhan5193
    @nashmianorhan5193 3 роки тому +317

    I definitely feel bad when someone mispells my name even after i correct them politely.

    • @trankimanh4830
      @trankimanh4830 3 роки тому +31

      Agree. Mine was even worse. One of my friend used to call me by another girl's name a few times until I got so annoyed and he said "what's the big deal? Just a name" :/ yet some people claim they do this by mistake and it's not their intention but still, unacceptable.

    • @well-knownsnoozer3385
      @well-knownsnoozer3385 3 роки тому +8

      Yes! Admin workers are always too lazy to spell my name correctly, even though I already showed them my birth certificate / ID. Why are names so undermined? They're precious.

    • @agnesfrank2734
      @agnesfrank2734 3 роки тому +2

      Do you mean "misspells"????

    • @soniaf7794
      @soniaf7794 3 роки тому +4

      @@agnesfrank2734 Thank you for your comment.
      I have a hard to pronounce first and last name, but it does not bother me because life is too short and I rather to focus in important things and forget trivial ones. Maybe Nashmia Norhan will realize now that "misspells" happen everyday to everybody!

    • @foreveranelf9653
      @foreveranelf9653 3 роки тому +2

      this is the whole reason titles were invented. If feeling unsure, just address by titles. This is fairly common in Asian countries and even in Europe, but nowadays I feel Europe has adopted the American way.

  • @np1139
    @np1139 3 роки тому +112

    Love the “there’s no need to extend your pinky” Queen of Shade.

  • @emiks6612
    @emiks6612 3 роки тому +192

    _Mistakes_
    0:27 1. Not thanking the gift giver on time.
    1:09 2. Responding "no problem" to thank you.
    1:51 3. Greeting people you do not know with "hey".
    2:19 4. Man extending hand first to handshake woman in a *social setting* .
    3:22 5. Sneezing in your right hand palm.
    4:01 6. Pointing at people with fingers.
    4:35 7. Misspelling or mispronouncing someone's name.
    6:05 8. Placing utensils on the table after using them.
    6:34 9. Confusing the drinking glasses.
    7:44 10. Sticking pinkie out when holding a tea cup.

    • @angelenakashatok5925
      @angelenakashatok5925 2 роки тому

      Yes, people mispronounce my name and my name is not that difficult.

  • @tatjanakecman7236
    @tatjanakecman7236 3 роки тому +317

    The pinky extended is considered as a asign of uneducated person in most of Europian countries.

    • @tellingpool
      @tellingpool 3 роки тому +3

      YES!

    • @pinkandgreen7681
      @pinkandgreen7681 2 роки тому +48

      It’s tacky and try-hard, i can’t believe she asked to extend the pinky and make sure it’s at an angle lolol

    • @bigmoneymedia4832
      @bigmoneymedia4832 2 роки тому +4

      @@pinkandgreen7681 So it's "pefect"!

    • @carlitosway1330
      @carlitosway1330 2 роки тому +33

      According to history, the pinky extended was used by French aristocracy (who were very promiscuous) as a sign to who had a venereal disease. When you raised your pinky, you were signaling to anyone who wanted to be with you that you had an STD, so they would know and others who had an STD would know. I learned this from a video by William Hanson who also addressed this faux pa.
      🤘

    • @vanessa271
      @vanessa271 2 роки тому +5

      @@carlitosway1330 interesting factoid.

  • @KyCandicee
    @KyCandicee 3 роки тому +775

    Yes to a series of these (:

  • @-lavender-777
    @-lavender-777 3 роки тому +127

    Extending the pinkie was used in the high classes of old France to show that the person is single, available and interested in someone on the table. It is definitely not recommended anymore by multiple etiquette teachers.

    • @sbffsbrarbrr
      @sbffsbrarbrr 2 роки тому +5

      How interesting!

    • @alisameiah5035
      @alisameiah5035 2 роки тому

      i extend my pinkie because my pinkie is short and cannot reach to whatever i am holding in my hand.

    • @jerrymiller2367
      @jerrymiller2367 2 роки тому

      I wonder if this is where the admonition to "mind your p's and q's" comes from. The letters p and q on a keyboard are typed using the pinky fingers. And it wasn't that long ago that we were taught to extend our pinkies as the "proper" way to hold a drink. I remember it in the 1960s and it was regarded as a semi-automatic position of the fingers that you didn't really have to think about once you got in the habit.

  • @arvindkala5191
    @arvindkala5191 11 місяців тому +3

    I am from India. This Video on social etiquette was superb.
    The lady is super thin, soft-spoken, quick, speaks very few words, but conveys her meaning fast
    Excellent. I would like to hear more of her common sense.😅

  • @lovelylittlegirl3332
    @lovelylittlegirl3332 3 роки тому +59

    She is so effortlessly elegant and gentle!! Her voice sounds like a gentle pat of the back

  • @parkbanjam
    @parkbanjam 2 роки тому +231

    You made learning etiquette very interesting and positive. You are a role model. Thank you Jamila for inspiring us to become good people 🙂

  • @fantabulousstargirl
    @fantabulousstargirl 3 роки тому +57

    I personally think more young people are saying "no problem" instead of your welcome in certain scenarios because often times favors and other requests are "burdens", especially if they are for people who are not immediate family or close friends. They are not always "welcome" to my time and favors and sometimes it's not necessarily a pleasure to work for them.

    • @Shay45
      @Shay45 3 роки тому +23

      For younger people too “You’re Welcome” will come off wrong.
      Many people use it for sarcasm or if they are annoyed with a request.

  • @bitovroman7941
    @bitovroman7941 3 роки тому +27

    Such a classy and well-mannered woman you are! If everyone in this world was as polite as you it would have been a much better place to live. My personal mistake from the list in this video is that once I offered a handshake to a woman and she felt awkward about it and refused it,so my hand was just miserably hanging there...a good lesson but learned with blood :(

    • @qed456
      @qed456 Рік тому +1

      that must have been mortifying for yourself and the lady. Much better to learn this etiquette that in a social setting a lady outranks a man and then a lot of sub etiquette like walking a lady home , allowing her to sit first follow naturally

  • @relaxwhc
    @relaxwhc 3 роки тому +363

    Excellent content, this is much better than watching other programs like National Geographic.
    Any fan of Jamila? Please raise your hand ✋

  • @lasusurradoradegatos
    @lasusurradoradegatos 3 роки тому +93

    The topic about names is so true! My name is Cristina and specially when I get email answers from people outside Spain they usually write my name so wrong! I get emails every day like this: Christina, Kristin, Christine, Cristiana...and most of times they're replying an email from me with my signature on it. I find it so incredibly rude and annoying! I usually take my time to find out how to write other persons name correctly even if there's times when my keyboard doesn't even allows me to do it as there are names from other countries that have more symbols we don't use here.

    • @well-knownsnoozer3385
      @well-knownsnoozer3385 3 роки тому +2

      Same with me. Admin workers always misspell my name :(

    • @tinabean713
      @tinabean713 3 роки тому +5

      I feel for you. I used to work for a woman named Margarita and so many people would either misspell or mispronounce her name Marguerite, and it confused me because no one ever mispronounces the drink.

    • @shayk.393
      @shayk.393 2 роки тому +2

      if it isn’t spelled correctly- it isn’t your name !

    • @rubinsteinway
      @rubinsteinway 2 роки тому +3

      When you make the effort you are showing respect. They are not.

    • @DonaCrane
      @DonaCrane 2 роки тому +1

      @@shayk.393 That's exactly how I feel!

  • @dlbk
    @dlbk 3 роки тому +16

    Finally, I meet someone who thinks the same about how important it is to pay attention to others' names! I don't understand nowadays how it still possible that people misspell your name, most of the time you can just copy and paste it if you have any doubts!

  • @IrishChola7
    @IrishChola7 Рік тому +10

    Most of these are just plain common sense. Unfortunately, decent manners seem to be lost on so many people these days. Thank you for a wonderful, classy video! Hopefully everyone who views it will learn some valuable lessons. 💜

  • @ooooo000ooooo
    @ooooo000ooooo 3 роки тому +61

    I’d just like to share my thoughts from someone who uses “no problem” more. I’ve heard it more often among young people. The reason I prefer it over “you’re welcome” is because to me, YW sounds like it’s redirecting it back to the person thanking like “you’re free to ask for help again” when I just wanted to focus on complimenting the other person for their help. NP is like reassurance to me that they weren’t burdened by doing a favor. That’s why I personally like it more and prefer hearing that back.
    I definitely agree that YW is a more “proper” expression. Older people also tend to like it more. Just wanted to share my thoughts as someone on NP who doesn’t intend any malice from it lol

    • @isa9964
      @isa9964 3 роки тому +18

      I definitely agree with you. I've heard people say, "You're welcome" so snobbishly like, "Oh, I know you couldn't handle it on your own." (This is just my experience.) And it grates on my nerves and makes me not want to reach out for help. I've always thought of, "no problem" as a shorten version of, "It was no problem helping you." But that could just be me.

    • @logitek7778
      @logitek7778 3 роки тому +5

      I also agree with you.

    • @jhonsmith5710
      @jhonsmith5710 3 роки тому +23

      I think "you're welcome" is almost condensing. As saying "I'm doing you a favor." No problem sounds to me like "it wasn't a big deal. Don't worry about it." But I always just say "my pleasure" just because I feel it's the most neutral out of the 3. Context might also depend tho.

    • @Shay45
      @Shay45 3 роки тому +13

      @@jhonsmith5710
      I hate to agree with you but I COMPLETELY agree. With “You’re Welcome” all I hear in my head is “I’m doing you a favor” which is something that I DO NOT like

    • @andrewtenorio3195
      @andrewtenorio3195 2 роки тому +2

      I was actually going to make a comment about this very subject. I completely agree "You're Welcome" just doesn't work in our society today. As language changes so did the context of "You're Welcome" as it's now seen as condescending and snobbish.

  • @agnestaupelyte1096
    @agnestaupelyte1096 Рік тому +51

    I am so happy that I have found Jamila! This information is timeless and extremely helpful for everyone. Thank you for your meaningful work and the knowledge that you share :)

  • @Clolou
    @Clolou 2 роки тому +2

    Great video. In Britain the ring finger and pinky should follow the angle of the rest of the fingers they shouldn't be tucked away.

  • @tysongames2750
    @tysongames2750 2 роки тому +1

    Oh my gosh! I'm a man who knows about the handshake thing, but in my small town of local yokels, I've had women get angry with me for not offering my hand first.
    Even worse! The people in my town very often eat off of each other's plates during dinner 🤮.

  • @lenkacorlannova9346
    @lenkacorlannova9346 3 роки тому +143

    I would be interested in a video about how to react with etiquette to someone who behaves without etiquette.

    • @jennymarms
      @jennymarms 3 роки тому

      😂

    • @sadiaaa1373
      @sadiaaa1373 3 роки тому +38

      All of Jamila's viewers started off by basically learning how to be human and now we've leveled up to how to deal with _others_ that don't behave properly 😂

    • @charisma3479
      @charisma3479 3 роки тому +2

      Yes me too

    • @Chahlie
      @Chahlie 3 роки тому +9

      You aren't supposed to react to them as that would expose their failings, which they may not know.

    • @paolamura3497
      @paolamura3497 11 місяців тому

      Ignore any mistakes.

  • @katr9923
    @katr9923 3 роки тому +17

    that "no problem" response is so funny and takes me back to my childhood in the Midwest of the US. It's a very common inside joke among people who grew up in that area and for some reason particularly if you were raised in the Lutheran
    Church to use the phrase "no problem". I'm still trying to break myself of that habit.

  • @auberjean6873
    @auberjean6873 11 місяців тому +1

    ✨ Ms. Jamila Musayeva ✨
    I enjoyed your video so much. It reminded me of what my mother taught me when I was very young. It was also nice to hear someone speak English without slang, or "um" cluttering up their speech. You have such a lovely voice that I had to subscribe.
    Thank you, Ms. Jamila, for posting this video. May you bring manners back so they are commonplace.

  • @laibakausar8161
    @laibakausar8161 2 роки тому +7

    The b&d technique is so helpful, I always used to forget where to put my breads, I guess not anymore.
    I have seen many videos where people suggest to extend the pinky out and I always find it frustrating. Thank you for correcting.

  • @christinedhari6970
    @christinedhari6970 11 місяців тому +14

    Thank you Jamila for reminding me that I should still be following ways I was brought up with. In this day and age most of the people around me don't follow any etiquette at all but that shouldn't mean that I should forget my Mother's teaching. I found the tea cup holding session interesting. I've been told and have seen that the pinky is held up when drinking tea. I must admit my pinky automatically tends to stick out a little bit when holding my tea cup but not held up. I will practice tucking it in from now.

  • @neethunazareth
    @neethunazareth 3 роки тому +9

    I clearly remember my physical education instructor who gave me a rap on the knuckles in 5th grade, while he was supervising our class during lunch break to make sure we were all following dining etiquette. My pinky finger was pointing outwards while eating and he corrected me that it was impolite to point your pinky while eating or drinking. The lesson stays with me till today.😀

  • @suffragettesoul2687
    @suffragettesoul2687 3 роки тому +2

    In cross-cultural settings the matter of pronouncing correctly comes with limitations, some of them out of the control of the speaker, some able to be improved in time based on the grade or multilingual erudition, musical ear, the mother tongue and how close or far it is from the language of the name. The throat is genetically designed as a flute for the sounds of the mother tongue. This is why the young can modify it it and the old don't due to the level of elasticity.

  • @queenchiomaofficial
    @queenchiomaofficial 2 роки тому +5

    Such great etiquette tips! Thanks for sharing. I’ve noticed that I don’t like it when someone says ‘Hi’ to me (whether they know me or not). I think it’s because I work in PR so I’m used to going the extra mile in terms of politeness and also because of my Nigerian heritage. Nigerians generally expect you to say ‘Hello’, ‘Good Morning’, ‘Good afternoon’ or ‘Good evening’. 😊

  • @sbffsbrarbrr
    @sbffsbrarbrr 2 роки тому +4

    I can't imagine what I watched recently so that your video showed up in my feed. But I am happy to say "thank you" to the UA-cam algorithm gods. While I knew about most of these common mistakes, it's still nice to know that I am doing something right. Plus, you and your presentation are both so elegant that I just had to subscribe and see more. I think we all can use refresher courses on proper etiquette for various situations, especially nowadays when it seems that anything goes.

  • @absvkgaming2223
    @absvkgaming2223 3 роки тому +55

    She Is beautiful, elegant and a perfect idol all of us who are obsessed with etiquettes so much... Thank you for another polite video.

    • @girlhappy6442
      @girlhappy6442 3 роки тому +2

      @Godly Woman she should be an idol then our world would’ve been better. Jamila is an inspirational idol ❤️

  • @elizabethheather2543
    @elizabethheather2543 3 роки тому +53

    Sophistication at its finest
    Yes, that's Jamila 😵❤️✨

  • @foxesruler
    @foxesruler 3 роки тому +29

    Jamila, you have done an excellent job! I am glad that some people in 2021 still remember and worry about etiquette. Now, when you think about it - all these etiquette things are actually logic - aren't they? If you're in a formal social setting, all these moves and rules are something decent people would probably come up with themselves more or less. Keeping the cloth clean, being respectful, giving the advantages to women, etc - they all make sense. After all, we want our guests or friends feel good around us - right? Carry on the good job!

  • @ma.9029
    @ma.9029 Рік тому +6

    The “no problem” always sounded weird to me, English is not my first language and when I learned it I would always answer with You’re welcome or My pleasure but many teachers told me this wouldn’t sound natural at all, but for me No problem could give a wrong idea as you’ve said of burden, so I’m glad at least I was doing it the right way.

  • @farah9583
    @farah9583 3 роки тому +12

    I aspire to be as elegant and polite and well spoken as you 🥺 you’re doing great !

  • @francespike9780
    @francespike9780 3 роки тому +3

    Mistake #8 - placing cutlery.
    I've never seen anyone return cutlery to the table after using it.
    When pausing - two cutlery items are placed in an inverted V, as demonstrated.
    When finished and to signal place can be removed by waiting staff - cutlery items are placed side by side - not at 6 o'clock but at the angle as first demonstrated.

  • @restisetya2611
    @restisetya2611 Рік тому +2

    These etiquette are really needed altough it's common and sometimes people do not care about that, but for upgrade your attitude and get respected by others.
    Thank you for these advice I would love to practice when i'm in situation.

  • @PeacePlease.
    @PeacePlease. 10 місяців тому +4

    It's SO refreshing to see someone actually talk about good etiquette!! I remember I used to enjoy reading Miss Manners books in large print at the library, when my daughter was a little girl & a book worm!? It's sad that people simply don't pay attention to table manners, at all and good etiquette seems to be fading away & considered UNnecessary - like good hand writing. I think both are important, but my children & their friends would probably disagree!?

    • @sheilaterranovabeasley1966
      @sheilaterranovabeasley1966 10 місяців тому

      Miss manners was also terribly funny!

    • @PeacePlease.
      @PeacePlease. 10 місяців тому +1

      @@sheilaterranovabeasley1966 Funny🤨!?

    • @sheilaterranovabeasley1966
      @sheilaterranovabeasley1966 10 місяців тому +1

      @@PeacePlease. She had a hilarious dry sense of humor. I remember her replying to a woman who tripped and fell into an avocado dip causing a wardrobe malfunction at a cocktail party. The woman wondered what one should do in this particular circumstance? Her response was quite amusing referencing how often does this happen? Etc etc. she’d call rude guests mr. And mrs . dreadful…Miss manners was a hoot.

    • @PeacePlease.
      @PeacePlease. 10 місяців тому +1

      @@sheilaterranovabeasley1966 Intelligent people usually have a good sense of humor so I don't doubt it. It's been some years, I guess I either missed out, or don't remember details about her. ✌&💖2U!!

  • @JodiYeager
    @JodiYeager 11 місяців тому +17

    My mother did a pretty good job of teaching her children basic etiquette. The only rule I was ignorant of was the proper way to drink tea. Thank you for the clear directions. I will endeavor to remember that in future. Thank you also for the video, I enjoyed it very much.

  • @ecburt5046
    @ecburt5046 11 місяців тому

    The "b" & "d" tip will come in handy next weekend for a family wedding...great way to remember..thank you.

  • @Jupe367
    @Jupe367 Рік тому +1

    I wish the people would value and respect to these classic etiquettes. Reminds me of the good ole days.. Thank you.

  • @staceykersting705
    @staceykersting705 3 роки тому +5

    I surprised we don't all know these basic tips. Another favorite of mine is: make sure to hold the door open for anyone behind you. If someone has a heavy bag or bundle (or sleepy toddler) make sure to hold the door so they can precede you.

    • @jerrymiller2367
      @jerrymiller2367 2 роки тому

      In the building where I work, the Chinese students ALWAYS let me off the elevator first or through a doorway first, and without making a big deal about it or even making eye contact. It's because I'm older than most of them, and it's deeply ingrained in their culture to do this. It's kind of nice.

  • @girlhappy6442
    @girlhappy6442 3 роки тому +32

    This is the content UA-cam needs 👍🏻
    Such an extraordinary and unique channel. I’m in love with it 😍

  • @sarahsyed-chaudhry1724
    @sarahsyed-chaudhry1724 3 роки тому +23

    You have a great teaching style. Its efficient, informative and pleasant. Thank you for putting in so much effort into your videos ❤

  • @mjr8791
    @mjr8791 2 роки тому +9

    Simply loved it!! Just subscribed! What the world misses actually is elegance!! People usually mix being casual with being impolite.. :( That makes the world terribly unpleasant...

  • @brittneydawn2429
    @brittneydawn2429 3 роки тому +9

    Thank you for these videos!!!!! I can’t tell you how much I need them! I feel so much more confident in social settings 💜

  • @jerrymiller2367
    @jerrymiller2367 2 роки тому +3

    Excellent video, Jamila; thank you. You have to wonder where "you're welcome" came from, and what was said before that became common. Apparently many people infer too much formality is present when one says "you're welcome" , or even a mild or implied insult, depending on the tone of voice and other context. And what about the French "Je vous en prie" which means "you're welcome" in English, but literally means "I pray for you." That certainly could be perceived as an insult too !

  • @gusmonster59
    @gusmonster59 3 роки тому +16

    The name issue - I have a an uncommon last name (uncommon in America) that isn't pronounced as it looks. No one purposely mispronounces it, it often spelled in very creative ways. I can see how this can also being an issue with uncommon first or foreign names. Unless some is named 'Mary' and someone else goes out their way to mispronounce it, I can't see a mispronunciation as an etiquette blunder.

    • @ajs11201
      @ajs11201 10 місяців тому +1

      Like many things, I'd say that context matters here. If two folks are meeting for the first time, then messing up a name is understandable. However, I was recently attending a staff event, and one of the big bosses entered to give thanks to the front line staff, and he blundered a few of the names. Mind you, the "big boss" is at least four levels up on the org chart from those he thanked, but it's really a horrible look that he didn't take the time to learn the names of those he intended to publicly thank since they all do indeed work for him, albeit indirectly.

  • @maryhanwael8745
    @maryhanwael8745 3 роки тому +3

    This is the probably the first time ever for me to request some video from a UA-camr and here it is awe you’re the sweetest💕

  • @anastasiatokar5239
    @anastasiatokar5239 3 роки тому +37

    Wow! Very interesting topic! You could totally make a part 2. 😊 PS. The white looks beautiful on you💖

  • @basakburakci1698
    @basakburakci1698 3 роки тому +8

    I'm so lucky to watch your videos and improve myself. You are like a sister to me, thank you dear ❤
    -Greetings from Turkey xo

  • @kasiaa7675
    @kasiaa7675 3 роки тому +1

    I just wanted to say that I love your videos. Watching you and gaining the etiquette knowledge is a pleasure.

  • @katpic9470
    @katpic9470 3 роки тому +2

    Yes. I received a wedding thank you over a year after the wedding! Now people don't think that thank you cards are important
    We always send thank you cards for any gift received promptly..Thank you for the video 💐

  • @okiedokey3106
    @okiedokey3106 3 роки тому +19

    I just subscribed today and this video look's like a gift.🥰 To be honest I really find uncomfortable when someone who doesn't know use "HEY" to address and I would be like where is your manner's in my mind. Will be doing all this thing's in my daily life even if it is with my class mate
    Thank you

  • @chandlersampson
    @chandlersampson 2 роки тому +3

    Your skin. Your confidence. Your knowledge. Thank you 💗

  • @kartinihanitio6010
    @kartinihanitio6010 3 роки тому +1

    I agree about point #2. It annoys me when people responded with 'no problem' when I thanked them. Also point #3, I find it impolite when people younger than I at work write emails with the opening 'hey'.

  • @kimgisedai9780
    @kimgisedai9780 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much for listing these. I knew quite a few already, but I am guilty of the "sticking the pinky out" club when it came to tea. I'll be sure to correct myself and my children the next little tea party we have.

  • @JeanDee
    @JeanDee 3 роки тому +4

    I really appreciate this. In my opinion, it's easier for people to start with mistakes to avoid than to start habits they might not find themselves needing.

  • @TheKatherine1958
    @TheKatherine1958 2 роки тому +3

    Hello Jamila,
    What a happy occurrence in finding your video come through my feed on UA-cam!
    I was raised having etiquette as a most important part of my life. Recently though, I had a person tell me that I was: “old school” and that etiquette was ‘dead’!
    It seems this kind of thinking is partially the reason the world we live in is in such a horrible situation.
    So I thank you ever so much.

  • @biblicallyaccuratecockroach
    @biblicallyaccuratecockroach 3 роки тому +158

    In regards to the "no problem" point, I've seen it argued that it's a generational shift, old school versus new school ways of thinking. The old way of responding "you're welcome", since it refers directly to the other person, can sound more agressive, and implies that you just did the other person a favour, that you took trouble onto you and now they're indebted to you. While the new response "no problem" outright states it wasn't a problem to you to do the thing for the other person, it didn't inconvenience you in any way, and you did it because you wanted to.
    I'm a millennial, so a newer generation, and new school, and I do not like "you're welcome" because it sounds sarcastic to me, and I much prefer "no problem" for the reasons stated above.
    "My pleasure" is a bit of a middle ground, old school formality but without the direct confrontation of "you're welcome", since you're referring to yourself like you do with "no problem", sparing the other person from the discomfort of being directly referenced.

    • @supriyaarunnair
      @supriyaarunnair 3 роки тому +33

      True. Whenever I say no problem, I genuinely mean that it was literally not even a bother for me.

    • @bannedcommander2932
      @bannedcommander2932 3 роки тому +25

      It's more of an issue of setting and culture. In America, no one will think worse of you for saying "no problem", unless you're in an extremely formal setting. That said, I think considering "you're welcome" aggressive is a bit extreme.

    • @starstuff5324
      @starstuff5324 3 роки тому +12

      i’ve asked older people about that because “no problem” is what naturally comes out as a response, and none of them have seen an issue with it. i feel the same way you described, all i mean when i say it is to alleviate anyone’s concern that they might be bothering me or being a burden. maybe it just stems from my own anxiety asking anyone for help. 🥴

    • @user-mo8oh7kp6h
      @user-mo8oh7kp6h 3 роки тому +9

      @@bannedcommander2932 am I the only one here response to (thank you) with ( don't mention it) . OK .

    • @tinabean713
      @tinabean713 3 роки тому +2

      @@user-mo8oh7kp6h No, I hear that one quite a bit

  • @TheConfusername
    @TheConfusername 3 роки тому +68

    Another good etiquette rule for men shaking hands with women: don't use the same power grip you use with other men. Women generally appreciate having their hands treated like baby birds. They will not think less of you for refraining to fracture their phalanxes.

    • @patrickkobolt3069
      @patrickkobolt3069 3 роки тому +3

      Precisely.

    • @bitethatbullet7054
      @bitethatbullet7054 2 роки тому +5

      .... are women’s hands so delicate that they can’t stand a normal handshake? I don’t think so.

    • @TheConfusername
      @TheConfusername 2 роки тому +18

      @@bitethatbullet7054 Most women's hands are indeed more delicate than men's in terms of muscles and bone density and while you may have the good sense not to go overboard, I've encountered many a well-meaning gentleman who inadvertently communicated the opposite of friendliness with an overzealous grip. I'm just saying it's better to err on the side of gentleness.

    • @jerrymiller2367
      @jerrymiller2367 2 роки тому +4

      At my wedding reception I shook the hand of an elderly lady. My thoughts were to give a firm handshake, which I was taught was a sign of respect and interest for the other person and it makes you look sincere. Well, I did and she cried out in pain. It turned out she had arthritis in her hands and my "firm" (but not too firm!) handshake was much too hard for her. Live and learn! Now, with older women I might let their hand drape over mine and just lift their hand---not going as far as to kiss their hand, but sort of like that gesture, along with a smile and greeting. And even with younger women I'm reluctant to shake their hand "too" hard" or long, as I would for a man, as they might see it as sexual harassment or a sexual assault. Best to leave them alone.

    • @wendigo1919
      @wendigo1919 Рік тому

      I would hate if a man treated my hand like that of a baby bird when shaking it. How off-putting. I appreciate a proper handshake. It should be logical to not do so to an elderly person, or someone that appears frail due to health reasons. A proper, firm hand speaks volumes.. coming from a man, or from a woman. Wimpy hand shakes freak me out.

  • @dinotherugger4040
    @dinotherugger4040 11 місяців тому +4

    Almost everything you said here was taught to me by my mum ❤

  • @yenniavendano9360
    @yenniavendano9360 3 роки тому +3

    I loved these tips. I have to agree in regards to our names. I try so hard for others and am so taken aback when people say my name incorrectly. Maybe we can get a reactions video? On how to respond with etiquette when someone does something like saying our name wrong.

  • @amupitanadenike6556
    @amupitanadenike6556 11 місяців тому +1

    Wow! I love your tone of communication and I love the teaching. Thank you so much.

  • @janiegolden5338
    @janiegolden5338 11 місяців тому +1

    Thank you so much Jamila for the classic etiquette video!

  • @paraspereira6263
    @paraspereira6263 3 роки тому +5

    Loved the video. Yes a series is welcome. Thank you so much.

  • @samikshabagadia8669
    @samikshabagadia8669 3 роки тому +3

    Hello! I really loved this video and I love your channel. I am looking forward to seeing more content like this. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with us!

  • @rebekahjalali6435
    @rebekahjalali6435 3 роки тому +1

    I LOVED this video! Such good basic information and guidance, plus the bonus is your gentle and elegant manner of speaking. i look forward to many more! thanks.

  • @Vidagal222
    @Vidagal222 3 роки тому

    This is a refresher and helpful for social graces esp the position of the drink, butter and bread and how to drink tea. Thank you!

  • @___lbl3849
    @___lbl3849 3 роки тому +8

    Thank you very much, Lady Jamila!
    Such an inspiring video. Hehe As you mentioned when people respond to "Thank you" as 'No problem" I feel uncertain as If I made a person do a favour against their will. "My pleasure" or "You are welcome" sound right for me as well. 😄

    • @Shay45
      @Shay45 3 роки тому +1

      If someone says “No Problem” it usually means that is was no problem.
      If someone says “You’re Welcome” it could have been a burden to them OR it was no burden at all. You never know.

    • @___lbl3849
      @___lbl3849 3 роки тому

      @@Shay45 Oops Not for me. "No problem" sounds rude to me. :))))

  • @hanibee22
    @hanibee22 3 роки тому +6

    Yes I love etiquette series 👍🏼 Never get tired of it 😍

  • @roger3584
    @roger3584 2 роки тому +1

    I really watched this one all the way through and I learned a lot today I appreciate you sharing this and how you going to do these videos this is really a good idea you doing all 10 steps that right there is what's going to flip the switch and make whoever listens to it have better manners and again thank you very much

  • @marjaec
    @marjaec Рік тому

    When she mentioned the lower case name spelling, that is so real! I genuinely do not like and disregard people who don’t uppercase names and the letter “I” when referring to self. It’s just so displeasing😖.

  • @Liliana-uh6lw
    @Liliana-uh6lw 3 роки тому +229

    wow Tommy Hilfiger's wife was very serious about the pinkie belonging to etiquette 😂

    • @ballerinadunord2349
      @ballerinadunord2349 3 роки тому +46

      American. Nuff said.

    • @palomaisme
      @palomaisme 3 роки тому +86

      Money and fame don't give you neither elegance nor education.
      That's what my parents always told me.

    • @kennethgrener
      @kennethgrener 3 роки тому +2

      I was told that the pinky is only for women. Men should never. And we should use 2 fingers (against thumb) to hold the cup

    • @frenchygigi
      @frenchygigi 3 роки тому +3

      Money can't buy somethings

    • @kyupin1075
      @kyupin1075 3 роки тому +8

      i thought she was joking, she seemed kinda sarcastic lol

  • @petravandermeulen4751
    @petravandermeulen4751 3 роки тому +4

    Loved it! Especially the point about a person's name. I have been told so many times how I "should" pronounce my name. Thank you for this video. Please continue.

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 роки тому

      You are welcome

    • @IrishChola7
      @IrishChola7 Рік тому +2

      People actually dictate how you should pronounce your own name?? Geez, that's terrible. 😧

  • @MikSonus
    @MikSonus 3 роки тому

    Just so soothing. I love your quiet confidence. 💜

  • @claudiawilliams1288
    @claudiawilliams1288 10 місяців тому

    I did very much enjoy this video. I knew the rules of etiquette addressed in it, but it was to see it confirmed. Thank you

  • @mansoor3159
    @mansoor3159 3 роки тому +3

    Tysm Jamila for giving tips on 10 most common etiquette mistakes I will not try and I am very happy that you explain me♥️♥️😍🙈✨😊🥰❤️🥰

  • @sanasajid1117
    @sanasajid1117 3 роки тому +3

    I loved this video, and yes I would love a series of this video.. ❤️❤️❤️
    One suggestion, can you make a video on how to stay productive and plan your day for students.. that'll be really helpful for a lot of us ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @markgrenier6787
    @markgrenier6787 8 місяців тому

    You're absolutely the best thank you I'll pass this on to my children also so this culture is never forgotten

  • @farnooshparsa5215
    @farnooshparsa5215 3 роки тому +1

    Thanks Jamila, your content is always educational and helpful ❤

  • @garlicgirl3149
    @garlicgirl3149 3 роки тому +11

    This was great. I often wondered how and why in US we became so casual? Growing we were taught all of these issues. Every single one. You were talked to if you did not comply either. Sigh. The only I struggle with on the list is pronouncing names. I have met people with names that are extremely difficult because not if native language. Some do get offended even when you ask how to pronounce it or you don't get it right the second or third time. I think included in manners is mercy. When folks mispronounce my name from a foreign country, I understand. It can be hard. It is not purposeful.

    • @rauchschwalbelp7693
      @rauchschwalbelp7693 6 місяців тому

      Because most people just put it on for show. Doesn't matter if you know how to hold a tea cup but still are a nasty judgy being inside.

  • @NothingInMyChannel
    @NothingInMyChannel 2 роки тому +5

    This was super helpful and well explained! Thank you, Jamila!

  • @carimyfashion
    @carimyfashion 3 роки тому

    Thank you Ms. Musayeva. I will follow you because I need these ettiquette refreshers very much.

  • @artchem1
    @artchem1 10 місяців тому

    It was lovely to see Etiquette brought back into every day life's. THANK YOU, your voice is charming and your expose ' about all pertinent forms of Etiquette, were portrayed ever so kindly ♥️💎🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

  • @alevtina7403
    @alevtina7403 3 роки тому +28

    I am an ESL student and I thought that " No problem" means that the person who did a favor to you didn't have any problems to help you that time.

    • @Chahlie
      @Chahlie 3 роки тому +4

      What went through my mind was the reply I was taught in Spanish 'de nada' or 'it's nothing' so..... mind you I never felt comfortable saying that though.

    • @lynnebattaglia-triggs1042
      @lynnebattaglia-triggs1042 3 роки тому +1

      To me, it says I was possibly a problem. Just say “you’re welcome!”

    • @pinkandgreen7681
      @pinkandgreen7681 2 роки тому

      It’s not wrong to say, it’s just not formal

  • @bonnie2632
    @bonnie2632 3 роки тому +7

    This is excellent. So many people ignore these basic courtesies. Please say, "going" and not "gonna.."

  • @ilariamasullo3353
    @ilariamasullo3353 3 роки тому +1

    please Jamila, give us more videos like this one! I find them super helpful ☺

  • @jankowal4655
    @jankowal4655 3 роки тому +2

    Simply brilliant explanation! I appreciate that the music as a background was played very softly.

  • @twinklegarg2377
    @twinklegarg2377 3 роки тому +4

    Thank you so much ma'am! Just a small kid learning etiquette from you everyday. :)
    Your videos help me a lot. Love from India.

    • @katesaunders6999
      @katesaunders6999 2 роки тому

      Your etiquette lessons are spot on, so to speak. However, your grammar could be better.

  • @mirandablair8850
    @mirandablair8850 3 роки тому +46

    I'm so glad you brought up this topic! You and Anna Bey are the queens of self development 💜💜

    • @lenkacorlannova9346
      @lenkacorlannova9346 3 роки тому +8

      Wow, I am also a fan of Jamila and Anna 😍

    • @nikitamisra.
      @nikitamisra. 3 роки тому +3

      Me too

    • @Strutability
      @Strutability 3 роки тому +5

      I love them both :)

    • @dianejames9663
      @dianejames9663 3 роки тому +6

      They are not of the same class 😱

    • @peabeam6231
      @peabeam6231 3 роки тому +14

      Please, don't compare her to Jamila. They are miles apart. Jamila has Class.

  • @stephensynergy
    @stephensynergy Рік тому

    Thank you for this gracious presentation.
    When listening and considering the reasoning behind ridding ourselves of the phrase, "No problem," it seems to me that this ineffective phrase diminishes the effort, value or the careful matching of the gift to the recipient. When we say, "No problem," we seem to be saying, "The gift was not important enough for me to expend attention, time or resources. This ill-used phrase indicates the giving of the gift is inconsequential or the person receiving the gift is insignificant. Neither of these conclusions are good experiences unless a deliberate shaming or insult is intended, which violates good etiquette.

  • @Silkelovesit
    @Silkelovesit 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you , Jamila. I liked this video and would love to see more on this topic!

  • @sisigateva
    @sisigateva 3 роки тому +6

    This was a very useful and easy to digest video. Please make a series. ❤️

  • @rachelgreen6668
    @rachelgreen6668 3 роки тому +3

    Wow ! What a video! I love your elegance 💛

  • @h069401
    @h069401 5 місяців тому

    Guilty of most of these, over many years from mostly not knowing any better - so, lots of room for improvement for me in 2024. All ten sound like easy to keep, common sense New Year resolutions. I started your book on etiquette and was very impressed by all of it. Particularly the content. The cover, embossing, illustrations and even the silky bookmark all have your signature effect - elegant and first glance, then life changing upon further inspection. Well done Jamila!

  • @clementinepeaches
    @clementinepeaches 3 роки тому +1

    As always, amazing informative video. Thank you, Jamila.