“How Do I Get Him to Try Harder?”
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- Опубліковано 29 сер 2024
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Hey everyone! This episode is a little more echo-y than normal as we had some sound issues but I hope you enjoy it and please leave me a comment letting me know your thoughts below!
As a tip: Adobe Speech Enhancer is a free KI tool that does really well when it comes to removing echo!
Thanks to both of you for this video! Please see my full comment below. Great timing! As if you were spying on me & my ex, lol. 🤗😉👊
What an amazing episode. Thank you! I actually liked "echo-y." 😊
I actually grew to appreciate the echo--made me feel like I was in the room with you. :)
Sounds about right. The bad thing about "therapy" and. " Women's rights" at least in America is to speak up and you're worth something.. but thanks to the 1960's and the feminist movement people especially men are still sexist no monogamous relationships especially with men and or commitment anymore. People especially men going around with everyone nobody gets tested he sleeps around with 50 different people and women aren't allowed to and everyone wonders why how children come along they are dumb down and don't know anything anymore
When the guy I had been seeing for the past year said “you should be glad I’m setting time aside to hang out with you” that was it for me. I don’t need someone who sees spending time with me as doing me some kind of favor, or sees it as an inconvenience.
I ended it after that because I lost respect and therefore the spark was gone (there were other issues too).
Good for you...he should have realised he was lucky to have time with you
My story is similar… In the beginning of the relationship we used to spend a lot of time together, see each other at least 3x a week (but I never said it was an obligation he had with me, he wanted to hangout as well). In the last months, he started complaining about seeing me every weekend, but I needed that time with him (and honestly, all girlfriends want to spend as much time with their boyfriends as possible). He had a lot of self esteem issues and, last friday, he came up again with that talk about seeing me being such a burden for him, so I decided to finally let him go and accepted him breaking up with me (I didn’t had the guts to do it before cause I really liked his company). Now I’m on day 3 of the break up but it still hurts to know how little he valued me, even tho I know my worth. His loss, but it still hurts ❤️🩹
If you have to ask that question it's time to move on. Someone that doesn't see your value won't put in the work you trying to convince them of your value is you diminishing yourself let it go
Amen 🙌🏻
Yep. Just let him go (again), last night. 😣
Time to be strong because he will be back 🤍
AMEN!
not necessarily.
Please girls hear my advice! Leave him. It might hurt to but it hurts way more to find out that you wasted years in a depressing relationship that drained you. Appreciate your youth and don't waste it with someone who's too stingy with his feelings and time. Please do leave and you'll find better. Even being alone isn't as bad, you win your peace of mind. All the time you're with this kind of person you're abandoning yourself. I never thought I'd waste 6 years with anyone! But time just goes fast. I remember seeing advice like mine and thinking no way 6 years is impossible to waste. Think again please! Get him out of your way, clear his space for your peace of mind and for a better man
There's no one busier than someone who is not interested
This comment should be pinned and made into a plaque! Gaddamit!! Too stingingly accurate
Whew Chile 😲😩
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
🥹
The best advice I’ve heard is that if you’re the one doing all of the scheduling and chasing in the beginning, then you will be the one doing that for the rest of your relationship. So you have to decide if you care about that or not.
This is very true!
Facts!! 💯
4 years ago, my long-distance ex broke up with me. I tried to get him back and ofc failed. Then I went on crazy dating for over a year and ALL SHIT happened. I looked at myself in the mirror and could only find a psycho, a failure, a painfully struggling woman. This made me quit dating for my own mental wellness. After I quit dating, I put 100% focus on myself. I got promoted at work. I bought my own property as a foreigner in Germany. I got second cat. I started the cooking channel I wanna do all the time but never did. Recently I met a guy and agreed to date him cuz he is TRYING HARD to get me and he looks good. What I wanna say is rly cliche but girls...Cmon stop thinking about why he's not trying hard. You know the answer.
Congrats on working on yourself and having a strong willpower. I'm slowly getting there ❤
Second cat😂
You are an inspiration. Yes your right we know the answer if someone not trying harder or not reciprocating the way we were.
Congrats to you and best of luck to you and your new GOOD LOOKING man! 😉
@@Kindness-vl8hc Take your time! It took me long time to get rid of the old me too
How do I get him to try harder...... you can't. All you can do is decide what level of reciprocity you need as a baseline in your relationships and know when it's time to walk away when your needs aren't being met consistently. People don't change unless they want to and even then it's a hard uphill fight to change. Believe people when they treat you the way they do.
Listening to it i thought we were seeing the same guy, I even got nervous! I am in the same situation and last night after watching this I made the decision to close this door and give myself a chance to be happy. Thank you for making me understand I am just a “video game”.
No marriage or relationship is flawless; they're all different. What works for one person might not work for another. But I've figured out that there's always a way to fix things when there's a problem. Five years back, my wife and I were on the brink of divorce because of issues in our marriage, but we found a way to fix them. It was hard, but we made it through.
I genuinely want to find happiness as well. I've got someone special in my life, and even though we're not together at the moment, I can't picture my life without her; my love for her is solid. I really want her back, and I'm all in to make it work. We've tried different things, like therapy, to fix stuff.
Saying goodbye to someone you cherish is consistently difficult, yet in my case, I received support from a spiritual advisor who kept my marriage intact. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I value this advice. I'll promptly look her up online. Thank you. I'm optimistic that following this path will bring about positive outcomes for me too; I long for her deeply.
You should.
I have been this person once. I understand this man who is ”busy”. I was the same in one of my relationships.
When you are too busy for the person you date, it’s because of a very simple reason: You’re simply not that into them. That’s the sad truth. And the reason you don’t tell them is because you genuinely like them and there isn’t another option in your dating life. So it’s easier to just go along with it when the other person puts in the effort and clearly wants to be with you. It’s very hard to reject a person like that, and let that go because you are being showered with affection. And you don’t have to put in any effort! The problem is you’re not valuing what you get for free. You end up wasting the other persons time. It’s very selfish. I think Theresa must know that she deserves to be with someone who is as excited to spend time with her as she is to spend time with them. This man isn’t it. He likes her, sure, but only because she likes him. He isn’t valuing her at all and probably isn’t even that attracted to her. She is a friend with benefits.
Honest answer. If you feel Iike a placeholder, you're one 😢 move on. It's better to be single than alone in a relationship 😊
My mum used to say that “better to be alone and happy than with someone and miserable..” 😅 I used to say “what about with someone and happy” 🤷🏻♀️
This is my exact situation and breaks my heart because you're so right.
I cant and won't win at this game but its impossible.
I'm saving this and will rewatch and rewatch until its burnt in my brain and my heart.
Thankyou both ❤
When you have to ask yourself, "Should I accept xyz-" that's a good cue to take a step back and ask yourself what you truly want out of this relationship, this love, this life. If the person you're with makes you feel like a burden or obligation, it's time to move on. Long-distance relationships can be really challenging, and it's so important to honor your own needs and feelings. Remember, you are worthy of being a priority, not an option.
29:57 “ At any time, three things can change:
Your standards -behaviors you’re willing to accept from someone
Their behavior -what they do
The status of the relationship -whether you choose to have that person in your life and the degree/spectrum”
This sounds exactly like the 5 year plus situationship I escaped from six months ago. I made the mistake of thinking if I was just “good enough” his behaviour would change. It never did. I’m a similar age to Therese and I think I stuck it out for so long because I was scared this was my last chance. In the end I just got tired of coming last after his work, his own down time, his ex wife, his grown up kids……… I never felt safe or seen but my self esteem has returned dramatically and I feel so much better now I’m not expending so much energy trying to get my needs met.
Thank you so much! I’m 70, twice divorced. You just painted me a clear picture of my behavior and the dynamics it helps to create. Amazing. I’m willing to do what’s necessary to stop that game.
I’m grateful for the honesty and vulnerability of the woman who wrote you. And for her bravery. I hope she knows she has been a helpful part of my ability to finally see what I do in relationships. I send wishes for her happiness.
And you are very brave to comment about your experience too. Such a lovely point of view, we should always try to better ourselves and be fair to ourselves so that we don't tolerate these behaviors. You're an inspiration to me 🤗❤️
@@BurcuKyarGokkaya ❤
Thanks Carol - it’s been amazing to know how sharing our story can resonate with so many others 🥰
@@theresemavros8923 ❤
@theresemavros8923 sharing your story has really helped so many of us. I have just walked out on a guy I was besotted with. Who has been breadcrumbing me for months 😢 He text me after I blocked him on WA and presumed I was 'in a mood' and had the absolute audacity to say "This is why I won't commit to you. You're always going off in a mood" and saying I ask questions over and over about what he wants. Well, durrrrr!! I explained to him that I wasn't in a mood, but that despite what he thinks, I deserve alot better and that I can't do that situationship any longer. I'm not sure if he's taken me seriously yet. But he will. Because I am done with him now. Never again. Thank you so much for sharing your story for Matthew and Audrey to advise on, as it has helped me realise what needs to be done 💖💖
I could honestly have written Therese's story myself. I needed to hear this so badly. Thank you so very much ❤
I have a male best friend who works for a company that requires him to be on the road 90%-95% of the time. Yet, somehow some way, he finds the time to come see me. People make time for who they want to spend time with.
Thx to you both!❤💯🎯 The letter described my past relationship! It was working just long enough to give me hope, until it got worse again. I had to realize I wasn't needy or crazy to have & communicate my needs. It's not selfish to desire normal/mature/adult relationship goals. I tried patiently but got less if any effort & compromise in return. Difficult & hurtful yet ending it was better than wasting ANOTHER 5-10+ yrs accepting/tolerating breadcrumbs & stonewalling. Now I can be available for someone who is capable & willing to have a real relationship & be happy! Wish I'd heard this 25 yrs ago! TYSM for the confirmation.
Loved this podcast. Was in a similiar scenario. The videogame analogy really hit home. And it's true were not losing anything from letting go. We are gaining ourselves worth back in return. Thank you
It sounds like she likes the idea of him. And he likes knowing he has a fan somewhere far away, who he doesn't have to deal with much. Neither is defined as a "relationship."
Unbelievable the amount of value these young people are giving us. Thank you so very much🙏
I appreciate you Audrey! We are complex beings and sometimes I wake up mad/irritated, sad, lonely and yes sometimes I’m content and feel balanced. All of it.
If a woman feels like she has to ask then she already knows her own answer…
I’m currently going through this at 25 except we were in a committed relationship. My anxious attachment tendencies pushed him to his limit & he’s gone from being caring & in love to confused & detached. He just ended things for the 3rd time…I keep trying to salvage it thinking it’s all my fault but ultimately he has to want this relationship as well. I’ve watched you for 8 years now. The older I get and the more I experience, the better I am at truly taking your advice. Livin and learnin! Thank you Matthew and thank you Audrey.❤❤
Matthew you're absolutely right. I never been a needy woman but this time I question myself even if I felt that my requests were simply a basic things.
I stayed in a situationship were I never be able to talk about the bond and my feelings because he didn't leave me space and time to do that. And it was a tactic just to keep me around and never commit because he didn't want that. He wanted stay free in case that something better comes up but at the same time didn't wanted to set me free because he enjoyed my services and sex.
I was ok with that even if I was in pain but I thought naivetly that he was scared to be in a relationship after his break up. But when I had a surgery last year and he disappeared, I clearly understand that he didn't care at all as he said.😢
There are endless lessons in your videos, it has been so many years but you are never out of giving the best advice for whatever point in life one is. My most favourite life and love coach. I watch all your videos no matter if it’s relevant to my situation at the moment, there are always hidden gems in each video. The weekly emails are so incredible!! Thankyou so much for being such a force of nature. Absolutely love you and Audrey🥰.
I pay my compliments to whoever succeds in keeping a long-distance relationship. I don't want to judge, but for me it's pretty silly as long as one decides to relocate. In a long-distance relationship you maybe live the best moments of fun and relax when you meet your partner, but a person needs to be lived every single moment in every day life. Even if technology is great nowadays, you could never say you really know the individual living miles away from you.
Oh Teresa, it sounds like you know in your heart what to do. Let this guy go and find someone who will cherish you. Trust that you’re worth so much more. In the meantime, practice giving yourself the love you deserve. Best wishes! ❤
Thanks 🙏🏽 🥰
Agreed! You’re worth so much more Teresa. There is a man out there that will be more than happy to make you a Priority. This guy AINT IT and is showing you what he actually feels about you. Abort! ❤
He sounds like an avoidant (probably dismissive avoidant), which is not an excuse to treat a person like that. He can be a good person but doesn't mean he's good for you, the process just drains your energy (speaking from experience unfortunately 😞)
He just sounds like he doesn't want a serious relationship. Most men don't want committed relationships especially as they become older. It's a huge investment. Buzz words: avoidant and narc... Absolutely meaningless.
I've been in this situation. My ex kept me dangling for 5 years: I was his confidante, friend, holiday companion, quiz partner, surrogate mum to his child - and all the while he offered me NOTHING. I didn't even have a drawer in his house to store my toiletries/toothbrush!! When I plucked up the courage to ask about our future he very quickly got depressed and abandoned me. (I think he went back to his estranged wife as she was threatening to come after his pension in the event of a divorce, so he chose money over me). Lucky escape.
SURROGATE MOM?!!!!
Ouch sounds sooo painful omg *hugs*
I know how it feels when your partner only gives you breadcrumbs, or maybe more yet inconsistently (with long spans between). Selfish, inconsiderate, disrespectful... fits the description of an Avoidant personality. Makes you feel clingy when you're not - you're simply asking for reciprocation, normal/mature adult relationship skills.
* But... was this guy married? Never a good situation. (If he cheats on his wife, he'll likely cheat on you too!)
Thanks Audrey...sometimes we feel meh and then we feel like everything is a like party! Matthew this was a very good topic and spot on. The reason we avoid is due to Fear of losing someone but in reality, we already lost them. We just need a closure and move on...
Oh Therese, I can relate so hard to this! I pray for you to have the balls to safely say and do what you need to do for your own happiness! That Video Game analogy hit so hard, much harder than I anticipated 😮💨
to have the balls 😅
This is so good. It happens in friendships too, very difficult. Audrey is right, so many helpful things in this episode. Thanks Matthew and Audrey 🙂
29:57 “ At any time, three things can change:
Your standards -behaviors you’re willing to accept from someone
Their behavior -what they do
The status of the relationship -whether you choose to have that person in your life and the degree/spectrum”
31:24 31:54
“When someone changes their behavior, they try to shame you for your standards…”
24:00
A partner is not a video game that can be picked up, played with, and put down whenever they wants because a partner has needs.”
Yes, relationships take some compromise, but Matthew said years ago that the work shouldn’t be about trying to get them to be interested and spending time with you. That’s the minimum- that they actually want to make time for you. The work is when someone is sick, or loses their job, or maybe someone needs to work on how to communicate better. But the work isn’t trying harder to get them to want to spend time and treat you right. And that was a big moment that changed everything for me. I stopped listening to people that were in bad relationships and about how guys are just difficult, and i saw the light. If you have to work on them being excited to make time for you, let it go.
This really hit hard the video game metaphor. How are you so good at these Matthew? 😊 They always hit me right in face like a blast of cold water to wake me up and realize omg that is so true that was what it was like!
This happened to me. I love him BIG, but he has been unwilling to get permanent, stable employment and I couldn’t be with someone that was like that. It might not be a deal breaker to some, but it was for me. He was just incapable of giving me the safety and stability that I need. It killed me to let him go, but I am valuable too. My feelings matter too. I’m sad, but it is better for both of us.
Theresa you are not alone🙌
And Matthew and Audrey you two are so on point! Thank you✨
This was me for the past 3.5 years only a local distance. A good but broken and avoidant man, but he couldn't meet this exact need and I finally figured out that he wasn't going to make me or our relationship the priority. Hard to do, but I broke up with him, and I'm moving on.
Any three can change at any time: Your standards, their behavior, or the status of the relationship.
Why do you post these videos as I’m going through these situations in real time 😂
It’s not even funny omg
this video resonated a lot, which gave me vital realizations to propel my healing journey, thank you, i'm one of your subscribers for many many years already, looking forward to being a club member soon 😊
15:18 "We have to stop, in our love lives, giving people the role if they're not capable of doing the job ... Even if he was sincere in his effort, to be the guy for you, what's relevant is not that he wants to be that. What's relevant is can he do the job?"
Matthew Hussey
Ive been dating somone for 4 months now..at the beginning i was planning the dates, setting the times to talk, and it felt weird ...like role reversal, so i just stopped chasing the need to feel validated and suddenly HE started making the plans, arranging the dates and setting times to talk, just let him come to you ladies, and if he doesnt...so be it..focus on your life, your goals, and dont sit around waiting for some guy to step-up, if you start off as the chaser and planner or youll be doing it forever! ❤
🎯🎯🎯
Best video in a long time 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
23:56 - 26:03 This analogy hit me hard right now :(
Video games... I'm so tired of this. I can also enjoy a game and I would love to have the same opportunity to just play without my life falling apart while I do so, but I definitely wouldn't be able to enjoy a game and expecting someone I love to stay around, watch me play and suffer in silence, feeling lonely 'cause I'm "busy". I'm so tired of people who expect me to be there for them, when they are not there for me when I need connection or help, and it's not only about romantic partners, that goes for all relationships with family and friends. It's not loving and it's not kind to not care about the other person's pain and needs enough to make a change for them or at least help them make a change to transform the unnecessary suffering into support and trust. I want all the people I love and like to be happy and satisfied with their lives no matter what they decide to do, even with things I wouldn't want for myself, I would just want to see them happy and do what I can to make that happen for them. I feel so lonely when I don't feel any reciprocation in this sense.
"Trying to derive a sense of safety from something that is inherently unsafe" An unwinnable game. Omg so true 💯🥺
My question is this and I know you have a billion questions but it's just this- if you love someone and it has been a year of laughter, good communication, passion, and compromise and what you have described as partnership. And one day you find out about his depression. A depression that you feel has been somewhat concealed. A depression that comes in bouts and that he doesn't want you to know exists because he doesn't want you to worry. Is it something you stick out? Something you say every wonderful thing about him is worth these bouts of depression. Or is it something you sit with and think can I deal with this every so often and when it does happen it turns into weeks about him, his feelings, and what you can do to help?
As a woman who was the one with the depression I can say. Your boyfriend needs help and I mean professional help. It's an illness which get worse if there is no treatment. My now husband met me when it started (I got it from the pill) and was beside me through it. From bottom to back to normal. And one day he begged me to do therapy and I did it. Still it was a painful period. It was about 2 years. Now 3 years later I'm very thankful to my husband. I know how strong he is and I know now how hard it was for him as well. But when you're in depression, you whole world is dark and it's all about yourself. I don't know you, so only you can decide if you're capable of helping him and be by his side.
Met someone who is currently a relationship coach himself who has been following you for years. We both connected over your book when we met online. Long story short in five weeks he love bombed and offloaded all his childhood trauma within the first two weeks then he went into bread crumbing manipulation and then expecting me to be his carer when he gets out of hospital as he has skin cancer. I ended it after 5 weeks as I’ve honestly never met anyone so selfish as 90% of the conversation and effort was on Him I was the one buying gifts taking Him places putting in all the effort. I was just delusional from the front because he had said he had done the work following your book and guidance and as I said he coaches men in relationships.. the irony😂
Yes, yes, yes come to Australia especially South Australia-Adelaide
Love listening 😊
This is one of the best episodes, thank you Matthew
Love the smile when he says My wife Audrey Hussey 🙂
Dating a single busy father of 3 . He only text me. Only see him once a week .The time I needed him he wasn’t there, My bro has cancer , he wasnt there for me, barely text he never called me. Rarely checks up on me . 😞its more like a pocketed relationship. Met his kids once.
Why would you date him at all?
@@ojala5555 He’s a good guy, I don’t know why he even asked me out to be his girl, I was ok just being fwb . He did warn me he is busy 2 jobs , his kids are athlete . I have feelings for him, but im slowly checking out 💔
@@lensal9334 If you reread your first comment and imagine that it was written by someone else, not you, you'd see that he is clearly not a good guy. If he was good, you would not be unhappy like this, " Rarely checks up on me"..
Maybe you need to redefine what good means. Whatever he is or the status of your relationship, he cannot be good if he's not there for you when you really need it.
First of all, never settle for being fwb! He will never appreciate you with low standards. He uses you when it is convenient for him, giving back nothing when or what you need. Youth and lifetime is limited. Do not settle with the crumbs! Don't fool yourself! Don't just love "a potential"!
Sometimes we have to walk away to let someone really see us or understand their feelings for us.
Anyway, if we are not happy in our relationship, we need time and distance to see the bigger picture and truth about it.
@@lensal9334 Maybe you need to redefine what good means.
If you reread your first comment, does this mean " a good guy" in your opinion?
I wrote a longer answer but it was erased. I didn't say anything bad there, but it was still erased.🤷♀️
@@ojala5555 Not a good bf. My feelings for him slowly deteriorating. I know I deserve better or I wouldn’t be watching this.😞
This is how my current story stands, unfortunately. Ive communicated what I want and what I don’t want in a relationship and I’ve given myself a time frame for change … and should I not see any steps to change the current then I will most definitely be making changes to the status of our ship. Perhaps even sooner. We shall see.
23:41 Audrey is so sweet 🥰
You're his video game... enough said. I took that and will remember that because that is what I have been in every relationship. Stems from not having a voice when young. I will not be someone's video game anymore.
Teresa don’t waist your life live your life this man is not busy he’s an avoidant person your love is out there love yourself first
This is exactly my story too 😮😢 it's like playing a game of Russian roulette
Great episode! I was dating a guy that did not make me a priority and I finally let him go.
Sounds like my ex, its not worth staying. They'll dispose of you eventually.
Re "toxic positivity": I recall, Matthew, during the pandemic, how you posted a video with you looking all rumpled and unshaven. You were not all buoyant. You were sad and dishevelled. Obviously it made an impression, because I still remember it so clearly. It was actually very moving and uplifting. It was great! So, yes, being real is great.
I am dealing with a similar situation…it will be six months in the works at the end of July. We are one hour apart and meeting up is always when he is avaialble. I make so many excuses for him and I know I just need to ask the hard question. This guy is empathetic and sensitive to me he just doesn’t make seeing me a priority. I am 6 yrs out of a 20yr marriage to unfaithful husband and I just started dating so I am so thankful I found Love Life!
There is no hope for the human race if at 60 years old. We are still playinggames.😢
No, we have chosen or choose the wrong people. There always guys like that. My ex was 4 years older than me and played games. My husband is 5 years younger than me and doesn't. It's our choice and also boundaries which we don't have. Has nothing to do with age...
Hey, I had a guy like that in my life for about a year! After listening to this podcast for a long time, I ended things. He was a genius - brilliant, funny, a deep thinker - but he'd disappear in the middle of a conversation. He also had a terminal condition that was slowly paralysing him, so I forgave an awful lot. Finally though I figured he was playing me. I just cut contact and stopped responding.
Thanks for the message bring in this video, I even make a note. It helps me to clearer more about how’s relationships work
Yes, please come to Australia ( South Australia) 🙏
After 6 months , I asked him should we go on next step but I already know the answer is NO and the reason is he doesn’t know what he want and where he wants to go with me. He doesn’t want long distance relationship with me.
Loved this episode, absolutely related with the talk. I actually heard someone rustling around in the background (maybe a mic was in reach of someone or something) which was a little distracting...i'm not sure if i'm alone in hearing this? But just some feedback if you guys are open to it? Thanks so much for the wonderful chat..
She doesnt want to listen to her gut and choose to not look at how he's showing up bcuz she doesnt want to lose him
Well she is going to learn the hard way. Weak...
@@jessicahitchens6926 you have no empathy and super judgmental you need to heal
Open my eyes!!!! Thank you so much! Your podcast is lifesaver!
The man being described is clearly a narcissist and is not going to be able to meet her needs. I love love love how Audrey summed up the traits of a narcissist by just simply listing the problematic behaviour without actually calling him out with the label
My relationship to a t, spot on Matthew and Audrey ❤
Is this correct? -->. 1 more variable that can be changed is the Value she offers to him (E.g. Time, effort, etc)
I know how this feels. How crushing it is to be treated like you dont have value. He sounds like a selfish, manipulative man who i imagine sees someone else in his own city. These type of men leave a path of destruction and just get away with it. Its not fair. I hope you find a nice guy and my hope is men like this feel the pain they leave.
There is something I would like to address that you haven't spoken about. In the States so so many people are bipolar and there are many that do not even know about it. I'm on a marriage of 25 years that is a complete mess because of it. He is under a doctor's care but he continues to get worse with age. We are now living apart for my safety. Not sure where he is mentally anymore besides from where he tells me & that's not good. I realized it's not his fault he is mentally ill & I am no longer his priority like it should be. I personally believe that this is so much harder to judge what to do. But I'm open to suggestions.
" ..for your safety"? It sounds serious.
You can still be friendly with him if you want, but do all you can for your safety!
Am still single still looking for the best
That's a good stance Micah! Are you looking for a friend with the same mindset?
@@CocinandoconMartha121 yea ofcourse if the right one comes am all ready pls where you from?
Matthew is literally on point 😂
So I have just went through this yesterday. Just one day prior he wanted me to be his wife and saw a future with me. But I knew that the lack of attention I was getting but I was never ok with the lack of emotional security I was going getting from him. The next day I said if I meet someone on the way then I will not reopen this chapter we are finished. He responded to me that he doesn't see a relationship with me and we won't work out. I just responded with ok. But I spent one year with him saying we need to meet in person first but the entire time he was never going to move forward with me. I honestly am not hurt about this. Would you block him and cut all ties. I just expressed to him the abandonment issues I have and would you be willing to handle this. He said yes he can. The next day doesn't answer me and texts me this wow
@31:42 I've been there before with friendships and that's no way to live. I hope that she moves on without him, she will be better off!
I have a concern here, my boyfriend is not financially stable because he always keep changing jobs. Now he got a job. The issue here is he always complaining that he's tired and very busy at work and no money. We only see each other once a week, and during weekdays we talk at night sometime there are day that we dont talk because he always tell me he's tired. We've been together in a relationship for more than a year and he never bought me flowers even just once. He told me that hes unhappy and stress and he's afraid that it will cause him depression. I don't know what to do now because for now he's not meeting ny needs to makes me happy i didn't ask much from him sometimes he just want to be quiet.
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me, i still love her and most times I cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, i love her so much, i don't know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her.
wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
Fake
@MichaelCave-q2sfake scammers
I'm going to watch this video everyday until I forget about him
With regard to the video game analogy....ouch. Ouch because too, too true. Still, ouch. 😢
you are both sooo awesome ❤ you mean a lot to all of us ❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥
He doesn't want a relationship. It's a lifestyle choice a lot of men don't want to invest.
Good episode!
I'm interested in understanding what went wrong with the audio in this episode, seriously, I think the mics were off and audio came from another mic?
I know this to well
Fan from Tamilnadu ❤
I love you guys ❤ Thank you ❤
The roles need to be reversed here…. The lady writing in needs to start getting busy and real busy not laying games….and wait for him to ask and she hands the guy the calendar and saying here pick a date to see me ….
I thought, have we dated the same guy? But then she said he’s 58 years old. 😅
Obg por tudo divo ❤
Hi i do not understand how can i make him work harder towards me thank you😊😊
My crush just planned a trip with me. He said reservations were made but didn’t follow up with me. So I guess we’re not pushing it through. He’s done this a couple of times already.
I wonder what to say to make him feel bad and that Im done with it. (In a nice way)
just say no, sorry I'm not interested any more. he's not interested in u. he might eventually take u somewhere but it will just be for sex. take it from a guy, if we're interested remotely seriously in a girl we'll MAKE it happen. if we sideline u, with have other more attractive options n ur just a back up or one of many
Please talk about how to support my guy who suddenly faced with death of his mother right after our second week of dating when everything was working perfectly well...
Now he tells me he doesn't have the energy and concentration at all , by the way he seems to be still wanting me but I can't see any effort herein ...
Give him some time
Exclusivity is last of her concerns cause he doesn’t have time or energy for another girlfriend ? Sounds to me he doesn’t really want a relationship at all.
why isn’t stephen on here anymore? enjoyed your chats?