Travelling Back In Time

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  • Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
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    The Lads discuss what time period they would like to RETVRN to and why.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 174

  • @PunksterOS
    @PunksterOS 4 місяці тому +39

    Akira Kurosawa needs to have a word with John about these camera angles.

  • @amandajean7738
    @amandajean7738 4 місяці тому +31

    Agree with Beau seeing the pyramids in their prime would be amazing.
    The ancient Britons constructed small hive like stone houses. Metallurgy was something the ancient Britons were known for with numerous archeological finds all cross England with intricate designs of nature and animals.
    Ancient Pagans especially Britons and Norse weren't known for their tolerance of "Gods" deniers. Many of us would be burned alive as heretics by these Pagans.

  • @watteffer
    @watteffer 4 місяці тому +13

    whispering in King Edward's ear about starting up a R&D program had me on the floor

  • @WizardJim
    @WizardJim 4 місяці тому +93

    "The britons weren't bad at metallurgy were they?"
    "They weren't exactly known for it."
    They literally were though, these are the people who invented maille armour and created some of the most intricate metalwork of the ancient world. Surprised Carl didn't know this.

    • @MacNab23
      @MacNab23 4 місяці тому +17

      Snettisham torc, Kirkburn sword, Battersea shield...not to mention the Continental Celtic metalwork. I do a bit of metalwork and I'm astonished by the skill of smiths working with primitive tools, and no modern lighting or magnification.

    • @VallornDeathblade
      @VallornDeathblade 4 місяці тому +21

      Tin from Britain powered the bronze age heights of civilization.

    • @TimothySielbeck
      @TimothySielbeck 4 місяці тому +17

      Metallurgy is not the same as metalworking. What you describe is crafting items out of metal not the discipline of creating metallic alloys and studying their qualities.

    • @kelotane
      @kelotane 4 місяці тому +1

      @@TimothySielbeck this.

    • @beewee4987
      @beewee4987 4 місяці тому +1

      Absolutely Wrong....I Invented Maille Armor

  • @shaulkramer7425
    @shaulkramer7425 4 місяці тому +14

    You guys should check out the book "How to Invent everything". It addresses all of these things really well.

  • @rogerfurlong1535
    @rogerfurlong1535 4 місяці тому +8

    I bring the secret of steel! Um, figure it out amongst yourselves😆

  • @Crusty_Comrad
    @Crusty_Comrad 4 місяці тому +11

    I personally would go back to that point in pre history where humanity was near extinct and leave a larger genetic imprint than gengis khan.

    • @JessyDoyle
      @JessyDoyle 4 місяці тому

      would be quite the challenge to try and get it done before being eaten by a cave bear or murdered by barbarians.

    • @Crusty_Comrad
      @Crusty_Comrad 4 місяці тому +1

      @@JessyDoyle only need one kid

    • @Inquisitor_Vex
      @Inquisitor_Vex 4 місяці тому +1

      All that to make one kid and it gets eaten by an 8ft eagle 🦅

  • @Crusty_Comrad
    @Crusty_Comrad 4 місяці тому +9

    #1 best way to succeed in history is go back to ancient Rome and invent brandy. Sell it as a cure to bad water, wounds gone foul, and as just brandy. Distillation is a simple enough process that it would only take a few tries to get a product worthy of the age.

    • @Crusty_Comrad
      @Crusty_Comrad 4 місяці тому +11

      In addition a "wine that doesn't go sour" is a selling point enough for back then, when drinking sour wine was common practice.

    • @TfuckyoutubeC
      @TfuckyoutubeC 4 місяці тому

      This is a much better idea than your other one I scrolled past to "go back in time and bang some hideous tribals during the planet-wide disaster that made us an endangered species at the time".
      For one, classical era women were likely more attractive than tribals, and for two, you wouldn't have to live in the immediate aftermath of the supervolcano that was so difficult to live through, that literally our entire species can now trace our genetic lineage back to one woman in Georgia (the country) because only a few hundred humans survived the event on the planet.

  • @Jubilo1
    @Jubilo1 4 місяці тому +11

    The crucifixtion?

    • @cftyftyufyfuyfty
      @cftyftyufyfuyfty 4 місяці тому

      Shilling goth cross accessories for ultimate grift

  • @timalley3906
    @timalley3906 4 місяці тому +2

    I love these Lads Hour segments so much. Keep them coming 👍

  • @jamiearmstrong3487
    @jamiearmstrong3487 4 місяці тому +6

    It did take till the 1200's for Scotland to kick out the Vikings and take the Isles, at a beach, in Ayr, not to far from Stirling lucky area.

  • @dashingeduardosuarez
    @dashingeduardosuarez 4 місяці тому +5

    I'd have gone back to when Titus ran the Hats out of Israel and explained to him what this would do to the world. Penicillin, be damned.
    I'd bring 'With Usura' by Ezra Pound for him to contemplate, just to be sure.

  • @RatchildUK
    @RatchildUK 4 місяці тому +4

    For me it's either: Witness the Egyptian Pyramids being constructed, witness the three unifiers of Japan or witness the rise of Ghengis Khan.

    • @jeremiaas15
      @jeremiaas15 4 місяці тому

      Speaking of Japan, I always thought it would be dramatically better if Sekigahara was some 40 years earlier and between Takeda Shingen Harunobu and Mouri Motonari. Would be rather hard to arrange that without instant long-distance communication though.

  • @stuartlonnen5355
    @stuartlonnen5355 4 місяці тому +3

    To make a magnet heat ferrous metal until malliable, place on large lump of (prefferabley flat) ferrous metal and strike it with another lump of ferrous metal. Ions in the heated metal will slowly allign in one direction and set as the metal cools - repeat this process until sufficiently magnetic.

    • @HERITAGE12
      @HERITAGE12 3 місяці тому

      yup. IIRC didnt the vikings have a crude compass made from a magnet floating in water or sommat ?

  • @holynoly3983
    @holynoly3983 4 місяці тому +10

    I’d argue the easiest option would be to simply travel to the beginning of Silicon Valley and just every penny you can earn into Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, etc…but that sounds pretty boring.

    • @holynoly3983
      @holynoly3983 4 місяці тому +5

      *and just INVEST every penny.

    • @Carma123
      @Carma123 4 місяці тому +6

      That doesn’t sound boring… you could change the future by subverting Bill Gates.

    • @jonathanwells223
      @jonathanwells223 3 місяці тому

      @@Carma123didn’t Bill Gates just steal all of his partner’s work and publish it as his own?

  • @alexanderm8880
    @alexanderm8880 4 місяці тому +7

    I gotta go with Beau on this, so much of prehistory and near pre-history is poorly understood and/or poorly explained by modern archaeologists.

  • @timesthree5757
    @timesthree5757 4 місяці тому +19

    Harry put those guns away.

  • @baldieman64
    @baldieman64 4 місяці тому +2

    Send me back to Arthurian times - Castle Anthrax to be precise....

  • @gideonhorwitz9434
    @gideonhorwitz9434 4 місяці тому +6

    Honestly I’d choose the Napoléonic era and just be like a real life Richard Sharpe

    • @everwake2689
      @everwake2689 4 місяці тому +3

      Now that's time travelling!

    • @Drewbius333
      @Drewbius333 4 місяці тому

      Bite...pour...spit...tap...aim.

  • @thatguy-gl3zl
    @thatguy-gl3zl 4 місяці тому +2

    This is like a connecticut yankee in King Arthur's court

  • @SuperTommox
    @SuperTommox 4 місяці тому +2

    I would love to see any period that is called "dark".
    It could either be the Greek dark age or the usual dark age.
    Basically any time period which we have little written documents of.

  • @cftyftyufyfuyfty
    @cftyftyufyfuyfty 4 місяці тому +2

    What we learned today is that as a man you should figure out how things work and how to make them before time travelling (or, you know, just waiting for the collapse)

  • @MichaelLeBlanc-p4f
    @MichaelLeBlanc-p4f 3 місяці тому

    Anyone who can read can 'Time Travel' without a magic machine . . .
    Do it a lot . . . Like travelling with Beau & Carl . . . only regret they won't sea-air-land travel to Canada and buy me a beer for being a no 1 fan. Love you guys.

  • @DavidTheConkerer
    @DavidTheConkerer 4 місяці тому +1

    Amusing!

  • @chadcadsonvii5258
    @chadcadsonvii5258 3 місяці тому

    On the subject of manufacturing tech, their is a YT channel called HTME how to make everything. He starts off with no tech , then stone age, copper age and builds upon each new technology.

  • @jekyllpark5570
    @jekyllpark5570 3 місяці тому +1

    Have a word with a certain Mr Alexander about rotating the troops. Periodically allow some of the battle-fatigued men to return home, with word to send replacements and reinforcements. That way Alexander can keep conquering all he wants.
    Also, remind him to produce a male heir, lest all his hard work disintegrate and fragment the moment he dies…

  • @seanturner1197
    @seanturner1197 3 місяці тому

    I'd go back in time to the year 2010 and redo my a levels and do better than what I got.
    I still remember some of those god awful exam questions for chemistry, biology, English and history.

  • @myopinionsmayoffendyou
    @myopinionsmayoffendyou 4 місяці тому +1

    Pre history, I'm going bring civilisation forward in my image.

  • @johngalt2506
    @johngalt2506 4 місяці тому +2

    I would go back to 1AD and develop the steam engine.

  • @OrwellsHousecat
    @OrwellsHousecat 4 місяці тому +1

    Harry looking very Viking

  • @DutchFurnace
    @DutchFurnace 4 місяці тому +5

    Unless you could teleport an entire, fully stocked/supplied, bunker complex into history, from which you could somehow contact local authorities to come liaison with you and to who you'll show/prove your advanced technology capable, and from which you could do your history altering, you probably won't make it till the end of the week. Even if you magically spoke the language and even if you could "practice" for a bit and look around while remaining invisible.
    If you got teleported somewhere into the woods, you could be dead before you ever even found a village, unless, but even still, if you're a confident outdoorsman. If you got teleported to somewhere near civilization, now unless you're a confident traveler and know where to head and what to do around town and have coin in your pocket, you'll come across as some vagabond really quickly and will have to convince people where and why you as a stranger without any papers/money came from, and if you can't explain that, you'll be thrown into jail straight away.
    Just the fact that you'll be an "unknown person" who can't connect to anyone else in the world to vouch for you, will probably make it nearly impossible to engage with anyone. If they catch you lurking around a village, and you can't explain who/why/where, they could kill you right there and then. And you're not getting into a walled/gated city, as unlike in Hollywood movies, unless you were a very familiar face to the guards, you WERE getting stopped and questioned, and at least turned away, if not jailed and eventually killed, when you fail again, to find anyone to vouch for you being a decent person and not some runaway crazy criminal.

    • @Trent-m6j
      @Trent-m6j 4 місяці тому +1

      "I'm a mercenary looking for work"
      Everyone's willing to do their part for the nation and direct the random merc to someone who'll hire him, and nobody wants to try and rob you or anything cause they assume you can fight.

    • @DutchFurnace
      @DutchFurnace 4 місяці тому

      @@Trent-m6j That's how it works in fantasy, but in reality you would be unable to just show up somewhere, armed, and say you're a mercenary for hire, without having "identification and/or recommendations and/or right of passage from the local lord". How would they know you're not a criminal, constantly on the move trying to stay ahead of being caught and recognized?
      City walls/gates served for security for people only partly in sieges, but mainly in being able to have clear controllable entryways where especially strangers to the area could be checked out, often having to stay outside of the protected area while their given information was being confirmed. Which is also why there's often taverns just outside the city/village wall/protected area.

  • @TheAlison1456
    @TheAlison1456 3 місяці тому

    Harry is risking being arrested by open-carrying like that

  • @myopinionsmayoffendyou
    @myopinionsmayoffendyou 4 місяці тому

    We would be a sorcerer with the right knowledge to the ancient britons. We'd make the druids look like a stage act.

  • @logangrimnar3800
    @logangrimnar3800 3 місяці тому

    These guys need to watch a few episodes of Doctor Stone.

  • @drdeesnutts48
    @drdeesnutts48 4 місяці тому

    Late Republic Rome would be a trip and great bang for your buck if you go to when Spartacus rose up and stayed safe you'd witness the rise of Caesar, the civil war, Cleopatra and the rise of Octavian.
    A lot of history is crammed into that 1 or 2 generations.

  • @shughy1
    @shughy1 4 місяці тому +1

    The Celts were armed with only spuds and you still couldn't control them 😀

    • @dashingeduardosuarez
      @dashingeduardosuarez 4 місяці тому +1

      Spuds arrived to Ireland with Sir Walter Raleigh in the late 1500's. Spanish brought them to Europe before him, in around the 1530's.
      Salutations from Ireland, thicko.

    • @shughy1
      @shughy1 4 місяці тому

      @@dashingeduardosuarez thanks for confirming they were indeed armed with spuds just like I said, you really didn't think that through, are you even aware of when the Irish war of independence was? I dont think you should go around calling people thick when you are so obviously struggling with historical basics.

    • @dashingeduardosuarez
      @dashingeduardosuarez 4 місяці тому +1

      @@shughy1 We're talking about the Romans here. Derp.

    • @dashingeduardosuarez
      @dashingeduardosuarez 4 місяці тому

      @@shughy1 The Celts were a Roman enemy. Rome...you plank. You think Michael Collins and my great grandfathers fought for 'the Celts'?
      That's proper funny. The three lads...running into battle naked with war paint on, spears in hand...against the Black and Tans with their rifles and their machine guns!
      'Historical basics', he says 🤣🤣on yer bike, lad; you're off by almost two millennia!

    • @shughy1
      @shughy1 4 місяці тому

      @@dashingeduardosuarez today the Irish and Scottish are commonly viewed as the Celts, how could you not know this? Have you been in a coma for hundreds of years?

  • @oswulf3142
    @oswulf3142 4 місяці тому

    Putting aside the risk to your own existence by changing time. The question is which period could you survive in until you could use what you know today to your advantage. Also as pointed out what do you know. If in a Terminator style scenario you can't take anything with you. Can you live off the land until you can make your way into the society to work your way up. Love how Carl is putting his DM skills to squash the boys start plans with restrictions ;)

  • @CivilizedWasteland
    @CivilizedWasteland 3 місяці тому

    Imagine just spreading university math courses to the Romans you'd jump technology by a thousand years just doing that.

  • @jekyllpark5570
    @jekyllpark5570 3 місяці тому

    Rome just as Augustus is mopping up after all the wars, start spreading Zen Buddhism.

  • @lisapop5219
    @lisapop5219 4 місяці тому +1

    Did Harry just come from the gym?

  • @thorshammer8033
    @thorshammer8033 4 місяці тому +1

    saltpeter, sulfur, and charcoal ....... This is my Boomstick
    or bump off Marx as a child

    • @Pangora2
      @Pangora2 3 місяці тому +1

      I'd make his dad make him get a job.

  • @JadeRunner
    @JadeRunner 4 місяці тому

    That's actually part of the plot of the 5th Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy book, Mostly Harmless. Arthur Dent is on a transport ship that crash lands on a planet populated by primitive, Bronze Age humanoid lifeforms and he's the only survivor. His first thought upon meeting them is "well, I'll be able to show these primitives a thing or two..." then he gradually realizes he doesn't actually know anything about how modern machines and technology work, and in fact these primitives are in a better position then he is because they're at least used to surviving in primitive conditions.
    Then one day he makes himself a sandwich in front of the other villagers and they all drop to their knees in awe. They make him the village's official Sandwich Maker.

  • @pinkandfluffysuperwokeblok9859
    @pinkandfluffysuperwokeblok9859 4 місяці тому

    I want to be a ‘non-technical manager’ in the Middle Ages

  • @robertwhiteley-yv1sy
    @robertwhiteley-yv1sy 4 місяці тому

    I’m allergic to penicillin.

  • @EdmundMartyn
    @EdmundMartyn 4 місяці тому +1

    What in the Harley Davidson happened to Harry??

  • @ChaptermasterPedroKantor-kv5yw
    @ChaptermasterPedroKantor-kv5yw 4 місяці тому

    If I got to travel back in time I'd go back to the 60's and 70's and using a 4K camera I'd record all the great bands of that era in glorious 4K live. We have next to nothing from those bands in the golden age of rock except the odd clips made for TV and shite sounding bootlegs. Because until the advent of the VCR and VHS sales of live concerts there was no financial incentive to film those bands and their shows. Whereas now we have shitloads of recordings of them playing as old geezers living off old glory, but nothing from when they were actually still relevant

  • @duncefunce1513
    @duncefunce1513 4 місяці тому +1

    Weren't the Anglo-Saxons invading foreigners?

    • @jeremiaas15
      @jeremiaas15 4 місяці тому +2

      Thats the Angles AND Saxons. Anglo-Saxons are a British-made thing.

    • @duncefunce1513
      @duncefunce1513 4 місяці тому

      @@jeremiaas15 hmmm. Hmmm...seems fishy

    • @jeremiaas15
      @jeremiaas15 4 місяці тому +2

      @@duncefunce1513 Not really, it's pretty much the same thing as the Americans who call themselves Italian/Irish/Asian. Slight genetic residue and bare-bones clutural elements, otherwise it's all original.

    • @duncefunce1513
      @duncefunce1513 4 місяці тому +1

      @@jeremiaas15 fair enough, you've convinced me

  • @2tone209
    @2tone209 4 місяці тому +2

    AY UP LOTUS EATERS

  • @darthlaurel
    @darthlaurel 3 місяці тому

    Definitely team off William first and foremost.

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    The microwave is another story 🤣🤣

  • @arden8290
    @arden8290 4 місяці тому

    At least a few weeks ago so yoy can place some trades or bets

  • @Build_Secrets
    @Build_Secrets 4 місяці тому

    What an easy question. The start of covid. I know everything, but most of all how the stock market plays out. Throughout lockdown there can be two of me working form home instead of one, we can share the workload while getting rich off my knowledge of the future. And in 2024, the younger me will go back in time, and I can just slip back into my life. A few years older, but much wealthier and having had a great time.

  • @DreadnoughtXXL
    @DreadnoughtXXL 4 місяці тому +1

    Go back pre 1066.
    Introduce steam engines, start with an Aeolipile.
    Hot air balloons, a simple bike or scooter.
    Change your family name to 'Invest in Microsoft'

  • @tim2024-df5fu
    @tim2024-df5fu 4 місяці тому

    Proving the existence of electricity will be fairly easy at least to people who have carpets.

  • @paryanindoeur
    @paryanindoeur 4 місяці тому

    I picked Athens at the time of Socrates. Evidently I belong here, because you all think like me :P

  • @jamescarty7598
    @jamescarty7598 4 місяці тому

    Dinosaurs OR spartans against Xerxes.

  • @Capt.Thunder
    @Capt.Thunder 4 місяці тому

    I would go back to some time before WW1, which I think is the single biggest misstep in European history, and arguably world history. The primary issues were down to a lack of communication infrastructure, so I would try to stop the Kaiser and Austria from starting things. Avoid the genetic bottleneck from the countless needless deaths, avoid so many economic crises, avoid the disaster of the 20th century bs ideologies from properly taking root like commies, Nazis, and modern liberals. You could do so much good for humanity at that single inflection point with surprisingly few changes.

    • @Pangora2
      @Pangora2 3 місяці тому

      "Hey Brits. You lose the whole Empire and Brussels becomes the capital of a German-dominated Europe anyways if you join this war." Easy enough of a sell. Convincing Austria not to go after Serbia would be hard. You could tell the Kaiser in Germany certain things, but not worrying about the Eastern Front might work. If they got to Paris in the opening weeks or months the war is over quick.

    • @Capt.Thunder
      @Capt.Thunder 3 місяці тому

      @@Pangora2 Technically Germany is under the thumb of the Americans, and will be for at least the foreseeable future, but I know what you mean.

    • @Pangora2
      @Pangora2 3 місяці тому

      @@Capt.Thunder the French wanted the ecc because German steel was once again crushing them. Europe wants to unify to get out from under us, and Germany is the biggest muscle to do so. In NATO the US rules, but in the EU it's the Germans

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    No up or down 😂😂

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    Put ya phone near a microwave it goes mad 😂😂

  • @121dan121
    @121dan121 4 місяці тому

    I'm convinced Tesla was from the future and desperately trying to recreate future technology with the primitive tools of the past.

  • @Fedoratip79
    @Fedoratip79 4 місяці тому

    1965

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    Did steve jobs understand microwave and mobile devices😂😂

  • @colmduggan8230
    @colmduggan8230 4 місяці тому

    I think meeting Jesus would be a big one for me im an atheist but it would be quite interesting to see if he lived up to his name

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    Aliens 🤣👽 bin and gone to trust me bro 👅👅

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    😂😂

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    No going back 😅😅

  • @withered8253
    @withered8253 4 місяці тому

    Damn Harry put on some clothes, im one inch away from becoming a simp

  • @stevemckenna1122
    @stevemckenna1122 4 місяці тому

    We would be killed for witchcraft lol

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    If Elon musk goes mars ask him after the 5 year journey😂😂

  • @HighLatencyEmu
    @HighLatencyEmu 4 місяці тому

    Id want to go back to see Jesus

  • @Trent-m6j
    @Trent-m6j 4 місяці тому

    I'm vaccinating North America. Just out of curiosity. Wanna know what the natives would've done if they'd become part of the gloabal economy and advanced.
    They had a tech-philosohy based in tension instead of compression that might've yielded fascinating results.

  • @joelkurowski9276
    @joelkurowski9276 4 місяці тому

    Knossos or Santorini before the Minoans fell.

  • @CroMagnon42
    @CroMagnon42 4 місяці тому

    4-11-76

  • @the98themperoroftheholybri33
    @the98themperoroftheholybri33 4 місяці тому +47

    Romans: "we shall rule the Celts".
    Gemanics: "we will pillage the Romans, but we'll be extremely loyal to them, but also we'll eventually rule the Romans"

    • @logangrimnar3800
      @logangrimnar3800 3 місяці тому

      Did they actually say this?

    • @swaythegod5812
      @swaythegod5812 2 місяці тому

      In reality Rome lost
      to Multi culturalism ironically
      witch torn it in half and greatly
      weakened it from within

  • @AuthoritativeNewsNetwork
    @AuthoritativeNewsNetwork 4 місяці тому +29

    I've read enough Isekai novels to know how this goes.

    • @beewee4987
      @beewee4987 4 місяці тому +7

      Slave Harem and OP Creation Magic?

    • @logangrimnar3800
      @logangrimnar3800 3 місяці тому

      More like Doctor Stone in this case. ​@@beewee4987

  • @annatardlordofderps9181
    @annatardlordofderps9181 4 місяці тому +17

    Varna, Nov 10th 1444, just to tell Wydelslas to be careful.

  • @RoyalFizzbin
    @RoyalFizzbin 4 місяці тому +9

    This guy wants to see the Geezer Plateau? Where in England is that?

  • @Roman.Leave.Me.2.My.Circles
    @Roman.Leave.Me.2.My.Circles 4 місяці тому +15

    Step 1:Don't be dead. Before going back in time, why not make sure you Pack antibiotics, lots and lots of antibiotics - especially doxycycline, if you're going anywhere near the bubonic plague. If you run out of antibiotics - and under no circumstances do this unless you are, in fact, a stranded time traveller - you can make very improvised penicillin by leaving moldy bread until it goes bluish.
    Also, if you aren't getting water from a well, or the rain, or an aqueduct, how 'bout don't drink that shit ever!? Boil ALL of your water first. Then you'll need to filter it. Find something bottle-ish, add a layer of charcoal, layer of sand - hooray and a cheer... You just beat diarrhea.
    Step 2: Get clever. Before you go, read up on the basics of steam power, harmonic oscillators, pendulum clocks, germ theory, modern military strategy, monarchic history, the schematics of the printing press, and ALL the card tricks you can stand, using mnemonic technique to commit stuff to memory. A good one is the person-action-object system. Let's say you want to remember the dates of... Oh, I dunno, solar eclipses - for no reason in particular... We'll aim for memorizing about 30 of them, so pick ones in the time and location of whichever era you're going to. Now, you need to remember the date of the eclipse and the exact time of day.
    Now come up with at least 10 people, 10 actions, and 10 objects. So let's say we're trying to remember the number 326. Well, 3 in the people list is Winston Churchill, 2 in the objects is "wash", and 6 is a unicorn. So Winston Churchill washing a unicorn. 326 is easy to forget, but good luck getting THAT image out of your head, though. Next, memorize any embarrassing secrets we now know about the monarchy of the time you're going to, and congratulations - you now have the foresight... of a god. Now, pack some gold, and silk, and nylon, and a laser pen, and an air horn,
    Personally, as an English native speaker, I would wander back to 14th century England, because A) it's before the Enlightenment, and people will be way easier to bullshit, and B) further back, and there isn't enough metallurgy, and they'll be speaking Old English. But it's your time machine - do whatever. Anyway, welcome to the past - it smells weird, and everyone talks funny. So
    Step 3, then: Become a living deity. But first, remember that English is a bit of a work in progress, and even just decades back from our own century, and you sound suspicious. Stick to the hundred most common words in modern English, and you'll hopefully be all right. Still, if you open your mouth in public... You're boned. Locate someone vaguely trustworthy, but not TOO clever, give them some gold, make sure they understand your instructions. From now on, they speak for you. Next, you need to dress up in all that silk and nylon. Nylon won't be invented until 1935, and silk is still rare in Europe at the time. People will love that shit! Now introduce modern music. The rhythms are so alien that people will immediately flock to it.
    Next, go out in the streets, and get your spokesperson to announce the next solar eclipse, which you've memorized. People are gonna freak out a bit, so let off your air horn a few times, flash your laser pen about a bit - make a song and dance of it, yeah? When the solar eclipse happens, immediately announce the next one, and claim it's you doing it. If people say: "Hey! You didn't do that!" just say: "Y... Yes I did!" Teach your followers basic hygiene, teach them modern battle strategy, teach them the foundations of royal rule, and how flimsy it is. People might talk funny in the past, but power still relies on more or less the same foundations as today, namely weapons and money.
    The monarchy WILL send an army, and they WILL attempt to make you dead. You can't win against that, however clever you are. So instead... Incite revolution. Most of the monarchs at the time retain their power by the threat of violence, and the promise that God put them there by divine right. Invent Gutenberg's printing press decades before Gutenberg, begin churning out pamphlet after pamphlet laying out the embarrassing secrets of the current king. Step up antibiotic production, cure people of basic ailments, move you and your followers to a remote patch of the countryside, declare it independent, give it a flashy name. Perform miracles every now and then - card tricks will go down really well, probably: people haven't seen them before in Europe. Have your followers track down the finest engineers of the day Begin constructing basic steam engines, use them to pump clean water up from the ground for all your followers.
    Have an elaborate underground temple built for you. Disappear inside, only let your spokesperson come out and give orders. Leave behind extremely specific instructions about how to begin the Industrial Revolution early, and grow your army, and maintain your future empire, and design good irrigation. Finally, have a very basic periscope constructed, and stick it out the top of your temple.
    So let's travel a few decades into the future and see how everything is going. Slowly accelerate the passage of time. Day and night will begin to pass visibly in front of you, until the sun appears a single golden line across the twilight sky. The seasons fleeting by in seconds. The fevered commotion of insects no more than a blur. Then the flurry of passersby outside, of generations waxing and waning, of great structures built in your name, the fingerprints of science and philosophy born long before its time, the drumbeat of industry coming alive. The development of modern medicine, of scientific materialism, of the mastery of nature, of the acknowledgment of the right of all humans to exist in a state of international equanimity. The dawn of an age where millions need not die of disease, of hardship, of war.
    You steer humanity now. There have been leaders and thinkers and sages throughout history, but none of them had your advantages. Now you can refashion history in the image of dignity, and kindness, and universal concern for every human alive. And all of it presided over by you: half human, half deity. Moral, just, indomitable, indefatigable. How noble in reason. How infinite in faculty. In apprehension how like a god! Well, I mean... Not a god, technically, because people can still revolt against you, and you can't do anything about it. So let's try a few changes in tactic.
    To protect your master plan, direct technology towards absolute surveillance of the population, towards a perfect political science, towards total hegemony. If you want to help humanity, you'll need to live a long time, so order your scientists to research a cure for aging. Drop by to collect the rewards of the new sciences and become immortal. Enhance yourself with electronic augmentation. The problem with humanity - too much freedom and leisure time. Remove both. Ban books, ban mass communication. Rule undisputed, technology in your left hand, power in your right, dropping in occasionally to make alterations or dispense great justice and retribution - in the name of peace. Shepherd humans up to the local planets, establish colonies, then spread out to the stars. Create a galactic empire ruled with imperious malice, lest humanity revert back to its bad habits. There'll be no love, except the love of you. There'll be no art, no literature, no science. Total domination. Unimaginable power. Who could stand in your way now? Who would fucking dare?! as monarch of the galaxy. As pilot of history. As God Emperor of time...

    • @tishie42
      @tishie42 4 місяці тому +3

      So you have thought about this a little bit? 😂😂

    • @davestevenson9080
      @davestevenson9080 4 місяці тому

      >germ theory
      >antibiotics
      NGMI

    • @Inquisitor_Vex
      @Inquisitor_Vex 4 місяці тому

      King of the cave!

  • @sweetie4915
    @sweetie4915 2 місяці тому +1

    I could picture Carl going back to the Persian Empire and becoming the real Sargon of Akkad. Josh becomes a General in Ancient Rome or Greece fighting his way to becoming Emperor and Harry would become King of the Vikings. Then Harry and his Vikings would raid Josh and his Roman Empire, while Josh was trying to invade Persia to beat Alexander the Great. There, I think I've got the line-up now.

  • @jackm2293
    @jackm2293 4 місяці тому +3

    that was really fun and distracting thanx guys.

  • @TheSev117
    @TheSev117 4 місяці тому +1

    You guys should read "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's court". It is literally this concept by Mark Twain.

  • @photosyntheticzee9915
    @photosyntheticzee9915 4 місяці тому +2

    I would go to USA before the civil war or Europe before WWI. Just to see all the chads that would end up dying in those wars. We don’t really know what it’s like to be around men like that, especially natural aristocrats who would attempt to lead from the front.

    • @timesthree5757
      @timesthree5757 4 місяці тому +1

      They died cause they weren't chads

    • @photosyntheticzee9915
      @photosyntheticzee9915 4 місяці тому

      @@timesthree5757 I always heard those wars were notorious for killing the bravest men, the men who fought hardest for victory, while those who lagged behind were the ones who survived.
      Seems accurate since you don’t avoid a bullet except by never poking your head above the trench, even though the only way you can win is to do so eventually.
      If you are defining whatever survives and reproduces the most as ‘Chad’ then that completely invalidates the concept of eugenics.

  • @hewhoshallnotbenamed5168
    @hewhoshallnotbenamed5168 4 місяці тому +1

    For me, I'd go back to the reign of Majorian prior to his assassination and tell him, "Hey, your boy Ricimer? He's actually a backstabbing, power hungry little prick. You might want to deal with him." And, BOOM! I just saved the Western Roman Empire!
    😁

  • @stanisawzokiewski3308
    @stanisawzokiewski3308 4 місяці тому

    2:06 Nietzsche be like
    8:10 thats very germanic "wordbook"

  • @MichaelLeBlanc-p4f
    @MichaelLeBlanc-p4f 3 місяці тому

    As an old Crown Loyal CanUk of long colonial history in my genes (with a mix of loyal Dutch & as well as French) and a life of serious historical interest & research, the absolutely overwhelming number of genes shouting pure pride in Britain, win by a huge margin.
    May God Save the precious Crown that unites all Anglos and May God Bless the King, Confound His enemies and Protect Him especially from His friends, family and the press that wallows in athe stys for the pleasure of the ignorant mob.

  • @mattanderson6672
    @mattanderson6672 3 місяці тому

    Defund the government, stop paying tax
    Thanks Lotus Eaters

  • @notshapedforsportivetricks2912
    @notshapedforsportivetricks2912 4 місяці тому

    France anytime between 1952 and 1973 when Brigette Bardot was young, sexy and available.
    One would have to learn french of course, but sacrifices must be made.

  • @voxsvoxs4261
    @voxsvoxs4261 4 місяці тому

    I'd want to be apart of Socrates' clique, probably about the same age as Plato, so I don't have to participate in the Pelopenesian war, claim that I have some skill in divination, predict the thirty tyrants, Athenian revolt, trial of Socrates, Plato's academy, Aristotle and so on, meet them and have some good chats, probably get provided for as a guest of Plato's family.

  • @johnwhick7419
    @johnwhick7419 3 місяці тому

    Every American going back to the founding to help rinse the British is an awkward one lol

  • @frankbarron1481
    @frankbarron1481 4 місяці тому

    printing press, camera and a daguerreotype and a bike

  • @Pangora2
    @Pangora2 3 місяці тому

    I would arrive next to Hadrian and tell him, of all the things he built, its what he took down that he left half unfinished will be his legacy.

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    Black hole interesting 🕵️🕵️👋👋😎

  • @debbielangton8371
    @debbielangton8371 4 місяці тому

    Theres more 😅 really 😎 electric and water 💦 😂😂

  • @BerndFelsche
    @BerndFelsche 4 місяці тому

    Build a (primitive) steam engine 200 years earlier.

  • @mrgabagoo580
    @mrgabagoo580 4 місяці тому

    Last week, the day before the lottery.

  • @thekinginffff0095
    @thekinginffff0095 4 місяці тому +17

    As an engineer, the level of dis-comprehension of technology is hilarious.

    • @GSPfan2112
      @GSPfan2112 4 місяці тому +7

      You mean the lack of comprehension? You definitely aren't a linguist.

    • @jane---489
      @jane---489 4 місяці тому +5

      *_Oh, shut up, Dilbert, your oversized ego is showing ..._*

    • @chadcadsonvii5258
      @chadcadsonvii5258 3 місяці тому

      As a physicist, I agree.

  • @amarok5048
    @amarok5048 4 місяці тому

    Slow news day?

  • @magicmanticore3536
    @magicmanticore3536 4 місяці тому

    2006, short before the crash, but houses and crypto after the crash.

  • @jeremiaas15
    @jeremiaas15 4 місяці тому

    I'd like to see how cavalry was invented. As Lindybeige noted, cavalry, to people who had no concept of it, must have seemed like an amazingly stupid idea. Also, I'd quite like to meet the first person who ate a fugu fish and didn't die.

  • @lindastone6868
    @lindastone6868 4 місяці тому

    Stop Blair's father from meeting Blair's mother, and you would do the UK a great service!