@@1Skeptik1 LOL they are though, like a jungle hunt 😆 Life is a wild journey through nature. Rough terrain, if they end up on an adventure with you, that’s pretty much what chicks really want. Remember Wayne’s world ? … Garth Algar has the greatest advice ever in the first one. Was it Heather Locklear and he did foxy lady with the jukebox (Dana Carvey 💯 awesome) Finally it’s revealed that he actually “was” in a relationship with her and he goes like this he goes …. Women want you to come get them… In fact, they love it. Not exactly what he says but she looks at him and wink. I’ve had some interesting friends throughout my life short, fat friends with bombshell girlfriends wait a minute, let me rephrase that wives, and they act like teammates because they are. Or even better watch those remodeling reality, shows and look at those dudes and then look at their wives. Or storage wars the German guy especially he kind of talks like a baby because he has some weird German accent. He’s kind of a Toby guy kind of adorable LOL but yeah check out his wife. I think you can look them up and they are a dream couple. She literally loves him till death. Also, noticed these guys don’t act like they’re gonna cheat on them, there’s no need for them to feel that way. When it’s right it’s right…right as rain.
The same criticism towards a man's personality and approach to dating also applies to women. Whether the woman believes in equality or not, they are not better than us men. They use our sex drive against us to gain control but men need to learn how to do without and use the magical all-powerful word, boycotting, which also works with being a consumer. Gentlemen, never simp for the sake of getting laid. Just like Spock said in that Star Trek movie, Desiring something in fantasy is much more pleasurable then actually having it.
Turns out that one spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage ... My Canadian buddy Dan once accidentally texted his wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.” * Moscow, Russia
- Mom, I'm dating the neighbor ... - But he could be your father, dear ... - Age doesn't matter to me, Mom ... - I don't think you understand, honey ... * Moscow, Russia
@@draltamimi First of all it's tOvarish ... Second of all, I was born 10 years after this form of address went out of use in this country ... So just plain muzhik, bratan, druzhishe or chuvak would do ... )))
A very enlightening video! Much of what you said describes me. You get in a rut that is hard to get out of. Get up go to work, come home tired, almost too tired to make anything to eat, so heat up pre made batches of food made from freezer. Watch TV, go on computer, go to bed, repeat 5 days a week. Weekend you spend time doing the errands that you cannot do or have energy to do during the week. Groceries, laundry, banking etc. Of course being 63 years old is not an asset either. Time, money, are key factors needed. Time being probably the most important. After awhile you become introverted to a point of being a hermit.
Start by committing to 15 min a day after work to do something that will move you forward in a positive way. Choose only one thing or you won't stick with it. Maybe it's body weight exercises. When it's a habit, add something. You'll end up with more energy and make better dinner choices. You can do it!
Great comment !!! I am the same as you Nick. I'm only 59 but that's pretty much my life. I do go to the gym daily. I just completed 14 years of care taking for my parents. Now that they are both gone. I have begun to get back into the dating world. Wow has it changed. I think it has passed me by.
Make the gym part of your life. Everyday or every second day. You will feel much better. I got wealthy years ago so don't have to work. Was married ,have kids the whole thing. I dated a couple of American w-m-n and that was enough I don't need drama in my life and 99% of single women over 40 are train wreaks. I book a flight to Thailand 3 times a year for about a month each time. And have fun. If you look for single women in the U.S. you will either have to lower your standards way down or you will waste alot of time with the entitled masculine American w-m-n. If you fish in a swamp full of sucker fish that is what you will catch.
After having moved on from listening to “red pill” “manosphere” content creators, I’d say the best thing they have done for me is getting many men to remove themselves as my competition by making them bitter and paranoid towards women and relationships.
@@deneseepaul6882 I’ve met soo many people that are not bitter or negative. Go in with an open mind and she switches out of nowhere. Society now is all about ghosting and situationships. I think me are realizing they are better off single than chasing something that is real one day and gone the next.
If beeing yourself seemed to be wrong who would you pretend to be to have more success? I don't understand what's wrong with being yourself if that means to be authentic and honest.
@@masterofdesaster8610 If being yourself means being soft and insecure you've already lost. Project self confidence even if you have to force yourself to do it. Self confidence (and I don't mean arrogance or meanness) is catnip for women
@@PendeltonWhiskey ...and vice versa. As a woman I like confident men and I know men like confident women. And being yourself is the shortes way to get rid of incompatible people.
The biggest problem I have is politics. I am a conservative man living in California. I'm financially secure and decent shape reasonably handsome, but when women find out about my politics they lose interest. I am not getting involved with any more liberal women, and she definitely cannot be an atheist. Those are pretty core values I will not compromise on.
Hi Anthony, I'm British but have visited the US. Do you need to be exactly where you are? California is full of conservatives once you go south of LA (Orange County, San Diego etc.). You know that Ronald Reagan was a governor there, and Richard Nixon a senator? Either that or hop over the state border to Nevada - plenty of conservatives there too. I stayed in Boulder City (near the Hoover Dam) and the local library took the National Review (this was when Bill Buckley and Joe Sobran wrote for it, so I'm dating myself here).
sure but don't have sex with them cause abortion is tabo and you'll be paying for at least 18 years. Keep it in your pants with the red tie wearing girls unless you find the unicorn
How are you supposed to figure our your purpose in life. They say God has a plan for everyone but most don't live long enough to hear what it is. He don't talk to people either. What were they smoking to be hearing voices.....wow.
I lie about my height all the time because six foot is so much easier to say than five foot eleven and three-quarters, and most women here don't understand what 182 cm means. Now that I think about it, I'm probably more interested in the women who do know what 182 cm is.
I happen to be exactly six feet tall and I don't envy anyone taller than me. Even at six feet which isn't unusual I've banged my head on things more times than my not so good memory can remember. I wouldn't have minded being a bit shorter just not so short that I'd need a big pickup truck to bolster my insecurity about being short
Even someone who is negative, addicted, out-of-shape, victim-mentality, women-hating, broke AF can attract someone...but it might not be who they want. But yes, honesty (without cruelty) is attractive to the right person!
@@YourWingmamand, what exactly makes you think that we're all out-of-shape, poor, addicts? Many of us don't even personally care about relationships. We're more concerned about the future of our civilization. And, whether or not women can change for the better while it still matters.
Dear Anna: Ouch on the "just be yourself" piece of advice, but I really appreciate the honesty. So, if we were on a date, or dating , you would appreciate my passion in talking about one of my favorite subjects, the American Civil War? A "yes" answer would be such a turn on. Thank you so much for this video. It really is sad how much we are influenced by everything we hear, and you are correct, all our shortcomings in life are our fault and nobody else's. Anyway, I am off to working on myself, great day for a run. I hope you have a great Sunday and an amazing week. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful smile with us today. Hug and a peck on each cheek. See you next week.
The right lady will be engaged by whatever brings you joy! Minor edit (more positive): Our shortcomings in life are our *responsibility* and nobody else's. Have a great week!
Good women are so damn scarce when you get to my age it's unreal. I know only 4 single women in their 50's and would not date them if my life depended on it.
The True Better self, points some of them I do for me. The healthier you is one: My health is tops no matter what. the inner inspiration : I am about 50/50 on that some improvement. The self growth, I have made a list, but seem to keep procrastinating too much or not focused. I need to find my niche on a career that is better , the day job pays the bills but makes me sick and is not healthy environment. I guess I am proud of my passions and can be me. You have to act natural not any put on false facades to impress anyone. If they cannot like you for who you are then they are not really genuine to start off with.
Start with one thing. Either the easiest or the one that will move the needle the most. Commit to 15 min a day until it's a habit. It will have a ripple effect. When there's too many things on the list it feels impossible to start. :)
Hello Anna how are you. First of all I like the background where you filmed for this video. So, lot of people had told me since I was little to be "yourself" even if their are full of flaws and bad habits in my life. We have to be our better self like you said and that's what which will get us positive in our life. We have to be healthy first both physically and mentally. We have to stop worrying about the things which happened in the past. Yes, we have to make the steps to be our true and better self. You helped me a lot and thank you for that. Thank you for the video as well Anna ❤. You are my good friend dear Anna.
"Be yourself". I fell for this advice from women my entire life. I think women don't understand self-improvement, and mostly don't understand their own instincts, and what drives what they look for,
Anna, you are so damn right. I always be your true self. It go back to self-identity. most people have problems with self-identity. people think their identity are associated with other person.
I think it's good you challenge the assumption behind the phrase "Be Yourself". Being yourself is good only if you have good habits and principles and only if you are striving to become a better person than before. Seeing jocks with big muscles flexing high value material possessions and succeeding in life and with women can make you lose hope because their standard can seem right, but there is a better standard out there. By normalizing negative societal norms, it's easy to become hopeless due to how unfulfilling they are. So, that's why it's important to not give up and remember what is truly right.
Anna,you are my wingman,you saved me as man,and at the same time destroyed me . You opened my eyes,but now,i cant do more than cry for not knowing you 10 years ago. Two weeks ago i discovered and saw 3 of your vids about flirting.........suddenly i understand all, i understand women,i remembered many acts,behaviours of girls......and all has sense. I passed from bad felling against women to LOVE ALL women,because now,i understand em . But, im 42 years old (everybody says that i look younger),i Lost 20 years of my LIVE,first for my cowardice with the girl Who i liked, second,the las 10 years for my hostility fellings against all women......Now i see the oportunities that some girls,specially one Who i loved, gived me........i can do nothing more than cry. I always was a family man,my dream was to be with my loved girl, and have childs.......Now,i dont know if i Will have this,and of course,i Will never have this innocent youngs love. Love you Anna for opening my eyes.
There’s still time! Maybe not with girls of the past but perhaps someone even more suitable for you now. Try not to think of it as wasted time but a long learning journey. Work on what you can and the tears will dry up, and your life will change. 🫂
@@YourWingmam thanks Anna. (And sorry for my english,isnt my first lenguaje,Im european) now i started makeing myself better,trying to fix my weak points. People always told me that Im Happy and handsome, every girls of the past looks happy when see me,but my insecurity (only whith girls that i liked) always made me a "friend". Soo, i worked on this ,now y can maintain eye contact on girls , i look more secure ,"fake It till make It" and i perceibed changes on girls and on me. I Will try your program. You are the only mentor on a entire world who actually made me understand women,and after understand women i understand myself as a man,thanks,because i feel that without this i would be a child forever. A man cant be a man without a woman and viceversa,web are a binary system.
@@YourWingmam sorry for looking so enthusiast,but all my life changed in one day for seeing 3 vids,your vids,you made my mind blowing,and isnt easy. I feel blessed now. I only wish to this happened years ago,i would be now with a loved girl and 2 or 3 childs.
Someone once said to me "Closure is something you do for yourself, you don't need someone else to allow for YOUR closure " Deciding to be yourself is along the same lines; but I like the idea of "Be your better self"
First off .....you don't have to justify to us the audience about the background. If people think you're going to dress up in warm clothing to stand indoors in front of a green screen , then not only are they small-minded , but also they are naive ..... and yes , it's awesome looking . However , I am a little biased in that the eastern provinces are my preferred cup of tea ! Not too far east though. This video was awesome , out of all your videos Anna. Love how you have taken your material for this one from real life feedback it seems. Regardless who a person is , whether you're a man or woman , we can all improve on one thing at very minimum about ourselves . Life for each person is a work in progress. Sometimes people need to not throw in the towel in relationships so quickly in some cases..... in other situations sometimes the problem is themselves and they don't even realize it. I can honestly say I learned something about myself over the last few years . Often my actions were a result of a learned behavior from parents.... as was the case with me and I'm sure is the case with many people . The apple doesn't fall far from the tree ....often !
From the outset, I recognized that this video would be like the first few sentences of a really good sermon; a presentation that I recognized immediately would need to be listened to again in order to receive the full benefit of the overwhelming insights. Therefore, my mind wandered to details during the first watch: 3:03 The cat appeared; 3:59 The cat disappeared; 4:42 "suspend disbelief that change is possible," implied a depth of understanding that few other commentators have; 7:41 "embracing agency." Agency is a much neglected concept in the philosophy of governance. You are to be commended for bringing this concept to the understanding of relationships.
Hi Anna, Fantastic you dropped in a couple of refs to spiritual alchemy and calcination. I thought of the poem Noche Oscura by San Juan de la Cruz. Hope you’re enjoying the cacao. Hugs and a blessed journey
Thank you for your sound advice! I can say that it adds up pretty quickly. Especially the part about becoming your true best self. Becoming magnetic. The law of doing as it applies to the law of attraction directly!
Thank you, Anna for your invaluable tough love. I’ve been inspired by it and today I got to do a four minute interview by phone with the great Brian Lara of national public radio NYC in New York and I got to talk about memories of my New Jersey shore life with my family and meeting Bruce Springsteen in Stone pony in 1973 before anybody in New Jersey of the world knew him and actually sitting at his table and drinking beers with him Now you tribute the confidence to call the radio station to some of the great advice I got from you over the last week or two so thank you. We love you.
I meant that I attribute my newfound confidence to listening to your wonderful podcast. That’s all I was trying to say OK peace out. Thank you for the great advice stay healthy and well and keeping inspiring us little caveman all the Beatles. Love you.
You make really solid points and often I am grateful when I feel “ thankfully this one doesn’t apply to my quest.” I am never satisfied with what I do others maybe which I admit feels good but for me nothing is ever complete I always feel I can do better. When I see her we will both know. Waiting ,GB
Hey. Thanks. Psychology suggests that "being yourself" (authenticity) is the only way to have a healthy relationship. I tried to change for a woman. It didn't work. It's too much effort. Even if you land one, you'll have to maintain the charade to keep her. Do you. Don't settle. Actually, it seems narcissism works. Do that. 😛
Every man needs to watch this video IMO. You just gave the best advice to men I've ever heard, in great detail, and in only ten minutes. Really, it's good advice for women too. Such men do not want 2 dimensional women after all. Such people are the only ones who ever have happy and healthy relationships.
I have been working on and accomplishing your six steps for a "True Better Self." Still, when women conclude I have never had a girl friend, they do a 180 and ignore me. I am 73 and dealing with an older demographic. Income level is the #2 factor in interest ceasing. The women I can talk to are either married or have friend zoned me..
0:39 Thank you for covering this! So true! 2:35 That's annoying because then that sets the stage that he's probably shorter than he is, when some of them do tell the truth
Hi doc the love game is just that a challenge game , 1) we need to beat attracted to them. 2)check out close up view grooming cleanliness 3)the quality of conversations 4)do they contradict themselves and lie 5) check out where they live and how they live . So if everything is cool basically time will tell and hopefully she is bearable or totally lovable 6) don’t rush it take time ok ,then have those will you marry me discussion , if he or she hesitate to answer this ask another question when and if you receive an even more Vague answer, start thinking about who gets to take what and go each other’s ways, because he or she who you were, asking, is obviously not as committed as you , chin up, have another go. I’m afraid this is the love game. If you’re after a wambam thank you mam or guy just Exaggerate , your gorgeous , you have great dress sense , I love your smile , plaster them with drinks cross your fingers and hope for the best and you might be lucky that’s my advice leave the hate out of it , it will only make matters worse.
Good to see the scenery and good advice. I had also thought, "be yourself" is bad advice. A lady would be bored stiff, if I was myself. I have wondered if people got tired of me talking about my love for Shania Twain (I'm seeing her twice in July), and the band I crowdfund. Shania Twain has become an in-joke at work, and I call her my girlfriend, but she doesn't know it. Strange thing happened on my dating site. A lady sent me a "like". I looked at her profile, only said she loves to travel. I sent her a message, asking where was her favourite place to travel to. She blocked me! Another lady, 3 weeks ago blocked me after I sent a message in response to her interests. Most ladies I send a message, don't reply. Only takes one lady to be the right lady, she's out there somewhere.
Really like the genuineness of Anna. All good advice. Got on this train (becoming a better version of yourself) years ago and haven’t looked back. It works.
Of course be yourself, but that means not self-editing yourself to please women and instead being true to yourself, but being a better self, being on a constant path of self improvement for you.
Being autistic, “just be yourself” was, by far, the worst advice (such as it is) I’ve ever been given on any subject. In order to get anywhere in life, I’ve had to mask my true self so as to come across as neurotypical as I’m capable. Which is not to say that I’m fake or inauthentic. It just means that I have to calibrate the interaction and keep my guard up a bit
You can be your better self, your best self, and still endure rejection or miss out on the one you really desire. There are no guarantees, as we can never totally influence the desires of another person. Be yourself. Be your best self, even. Never lose hope. But have no expectations.
Wow. Relationships seem like really hard. I'm nearing 30, and the sound of using my time and money for things I like (books, games, gym, music) sound more and more appealing
Don't care if being myself doesn't work. I outright refuse to be anything other than authentic. if they don't like me as I am then they aren't the one. if that means there aren't any for me that's fine. I'm not going to lie to myself, and her, just to not be alone. Take me as I am nor not at all. The fact is I am boring, stubborn and weird. lol Traits that people put up with but not ones they seek out.
Thanks for your help and support. Anna, please give some examples about how we don't have to be ourselves. Perhaps you can use some things that your boyfriend uses on you? Suppose your boyfriend isn't being himself, to attract and keep you. Then you get married and maybe have a kid. Then he starts showing his real self, which is something you didn't want and don't find attractive. You grow apart and now you're looking at a second divorce. Well duhhhh. Now you have an innocent child tossed in this toxicity and chaos. I have to stop now, this is getting too messy. I'm going to make myself some hot chocolate. Final thought: Anna, how much are you not being yourself with your boyfriend?
I can see how someone who doesn't know your work could get stuck on the "don't be yourself" statement early on. The first thought to come to mind was, "Wait, I'm supposed to be fake?" But the second thought was "She's going down the Best Self trail" which is, of course, spot on. If you take more heat than usual for this video, it could easily be from guys who tuned out before 5 minutes were up. Your topics were on-point today. My big one is weight loss; I put on pounds trying to fix meals for the granddaughter with the narrow appetite whom I'm now raising (working on expanding her palate, but it's a slow climb!). I find myself wondering how much of the Anna energy is from caffeine and how much is from the stimulating BC chill in the air (betting on the latter). Praying for you! -- Russ P PS/Ginger seems to be healing well from her spaying. Now, at least, Tyson shouldn't totally lose his mind because she went into heat. I prefer him sane, thank you. ;)
Hopefully, most will be curious enough to watch the rest, but if not they may not be ready for it anyway (and that's ok). As for fussy teen appetites, all too common, I feel for you! But awareness of how it's impacting your health is good. #caffeineforthewin #sanepupsforthewin lol Thank you, Russ!
Apparently being tall is a factor because I seem to be too short for some women. I'm only 5' 3 and a half. I'd have to be like 5 8 or taller to get the kind of woman I want. 😔 I'm sorry I'm down. Just a tough week, but it's getting better. 😊 Awesome video ⭐⭐⭐ ⭐⭐ five stars! You are totally spot on about everything and I'm learning so much! Keep the videos coming! 😊
You have an open mind! You’re miles ahead already. Work on what you can and the right woman will appreciate you. I know a guy who’s 5’ being chased by a cute 5’4” blonde. He’s not rich, but he’s got moxie! Let him be an inspiration.
I love the backgrounds you choose and how you put your videos together. I'm a filmmaker myself you know and I'm always trying to figure out just how you do it, ha. Well done
@@calebz5890 I have to agree ..... Fact , I have known guys with not so great looks that have awesome looking girl friends .... not trophy women as they are called , but really genuine good looking women . I was certain it was because of their innate confidence. When I started dating looking for my person about 5 ish years ago , I knew I wasn't going to get anywhere allowing women to pick me. Not that I am less than average . So I initiated everything .... the first communication , etc everything from the start . I decided , on each of the first dates thst I should be the one to ask most of the questions , Attempt ( regardless how hard it was for me ) to direct the conversation , but also showing interest , demonstrate the qualities I am looking for by asking all these questions . Before starting out I knew it wasn't going to benefit me to hope that the conversation was going to be 50 / 50 , so I took all the lead and if there was conversational reciprocation I would let it occur. Which of course is what I wanted to happen anyway. Long story short , by attempting to ""act"" confident, I became confident . I told myself they are just a person , no better or worse than myself. From attempting to act confident I not only became confident on those first dates / interviews , but I also found it a LOT LESS stressful to go on future first dates . I soon discovered the obvious ... you can't judge a book by its cover , meaning them. So often the ones that at first glance in their bios seemed like "" under dogs"" would actually be high achievers , and sometimes vice versa . One thing I do know , with my attempts at being highly confident on first dates , it would turn the other person into a very accepting person of me. As long as I wasn't making any judgements of them , they would open up willing with a smile like they were talking with an old friend . From there I could decide if a second date was in my best interest .
Right now i'm going with "be myself". I don't think it will give me any success, but after 3 decades of "change, change, change! I'm not good enough as i am" i've got enough. I'm 45 with no success whatsoever with women. Enough is enough..
@@YourWingmam Some things. e.g: - I have learnt to speak, as I was a very strong stutterer until I was 30. I am now very good in the local German dialect, but not yet in foreign languages (e.g. English or French). - I had acquired hobbies with lots of social contacts. However, I've put these aside again and I'm back to my original interests: hiking and fishing. - I went out a lot in the evenings. Concerts, events, meetings with friends. but now I'm spending more time outdoors again at the nearby lake or in the mountains. - I have tried to improve my demeanour in social situations. This has also worked and has been very helpful at work. - I've tried everything I can think of in singles apps, but it's no good. As a result, in terms of women... I can talk to women very well. Older ladies (20-30 years older than me) also like me very much because I am polite, very tall (1.96m), educated (I am an engineer) and have a decent figure. However, women in my age range still avoid me and I have never made it to a second date.
@@YourWingmam Some things. e.g: - I have learnt to speak, as I was a very strong stutterer until I was 30. I am now very good in the local German dialect, but not yet in foreign languages (e.g. English or French). - I had acquired hobbies with lots of social contacts. However, I've put these aside again and I'm back to my original interests: hiking and fishing. - I went out a lot in the evenings. Concerts, events, meetings with friends. but now I'm spending more time outdoors again at the nearby lake or in the mountains
@@YourWingmam I have tried to improve my demeanour in social situations. This has also worked and has been very helpful at work. - I've tried everything I can think of in singles apps, but it's no good. As a result, in terms of women... I can talk to women very well. ladies (20-30 years older than me) also like me very much because I am polite, very tall (1.96m), educated (I am an engineer) and have a decent figure. However, women in my age range is still avoid me and I have never made it to a second date
be yourself means ... dont pretend to be someone else ... making yourself ... more social or ... less isolated is not quite in the same wheel house ... you have to be social, you can be better .. but you really cant be "someone you are not"
Good advice, Anna, though I do question you on saying in bad advice be yourself and then say as good advice being your true self. One has to remember that many women out there are working and is use to be living in a certain lifestyle and profession, especially when you are older. You have to get out there and enjoy dome after work activities also. Tell funny stories and tales of work and your adventures. Be positive and when things are tough, put a good spin on it. Saturday night I went Tango dancing at two different locations for 7 hours. Looking back, I am guessing that I danced for 5 of those hours at least. ( recovering on Sunday) so figure out 10-12 minutes per 3 song set that is dancing 25-30 times. Yes, I danced with a few women twice, but I was not turned down once in all of the time I was out there. What does that have to do with what Anna said? I got to chat with the women out there while dancing and at times in between the dances. I told them a bit about myself on work and other activities that I do. It puts me out there for when I see them again, I get a smile, a hug, and a chat before and after I dance with them. Yes, there were some ladies that I did not dance well with. Yes, some of the ladies are married. Or prefer women. Yes, some of those ladies were in their early thirties, or in their mid 70's+. Yes, some of those ladies were very good looking 👍👍👍. I am putting myself out there, and when I am dancing well, enjoying it.
Love it! And I'll bet the more women you've asked the less scary it is. As for be yourself and be your better self, they are two different things..sorry I wasn't able to be clear enough in those differences. :)
Thanks, Anna. It all depends on my 'dancing' There are some times I feel that I brought my hiking legs to the dance floor instead of my dancing legs. When that happens, I become spectator or just leave early.
you gotta be yourself to a certain extent, because if you change who you are then you wont be happy in the long wrong because a woman wont know who you actually are
I don't even know who I am, being ,myself' feels strange, speaking my own language feels artificial, I feel at ease only when they give me a role to play, bc being myself is like getting lost in endless space, which part of that I am I just don't know
A few years ago I helped a divorced woman get back to a sound financial state with her investments - I gave her lots of good advise and encouragement over 5 years - One day I asked her for some dating advise - She was so BRUTAL with her comments - Calling me VERY BORING - It was like we were married and she wanted a divorce - It really HURT - She was a divorced Chinese American with one daughter - Thanks Nancy for being such a good friend ?
I wasn't able to date until now,which is much later in life. My question is this, When I meet someone they always seem to ask if everything works below the belt, when I tell them the truth that it doesn't,they stop all communication,What should I do?
If you’re meeting on dating apps subtly put that in your profile. Example “More interested in cuddles than carnal activities.” You’ll get fewer matches but already filtered for that.
Anna simplified it in points But the conclusion is the same - its complex with what women want from men That's often an unhappy reality most men face with their own women Basically become Superman 🦸♂️/Clark Kent but still Lois Lane wasn't happy Or become Batman/Bruce Wayne but still Rachel chooses Harvey Dent 😂😂😂😂😂 Then settle for your own personal Selina Kyle - if you find her - what a comedy 😂😂😂😂😂
I don't say negative things about dating American women to stop men from trying to date them. I say it because good modern single women are very rare and unless you are will to spend alot of time looking or willing to settle for much less then you deserve. You are far better off booking a flight to another country where you are valued. And the women have the qualities that would compliment your life. I know so many guys that got divorced from American women. And now they have a GF or a wife from another country and they seem much happier.
Very good video. Best thing I did was ditch the online and got out in the real world. Still single because I will not settle but definitely alot more quality dates and I'm having a ball trying.
Regarding the disclaimer at the start. "Better the wounds from a friend than the kisses from the enemy". Don't worry about it. Terrible advice #2: can confirm this is bad. I am 6'2", financially stable, have been told I'm "not unattractive" ... and still single.
It's so easy to just get a woman. But most guys are not looking for just any woman, they want that special one who's out of reach and that's why they stay single and so be it. This is true for women as well. So don't sweat it if you don't wanna settle for less. It's better to be single than to be miserable and be in a relationship just because. There is one truth that she talks about and that is don't try to impress others, don't let the culture control your mindset. There are so many things you can do just hanging out with friends or doing sports.
Lady you scary me with this "do not be yourself", but i get your point :D of course it is not always works if someone is addicted to something for example.
I have lived and traveled around the world. I have totally given up on Western women! I now only date Latina and Asian women. That have traditional values ingrained in them from childhood.
I'm not the richest, tallest, most muscular, handsome-est?, funniest (actually I'm witty), most intelligent (but close), have some defects and insecurities but you put me around women of all legal ages, sizes and colors (18 to 88 years old) and they will eventually want a piece of me or all 😂 why? because I can sense deep needs and meet them. The problem is, can they meet my needs? 1)Affection, and 2) can they not be a hassle? Affection they can sometimes meet but not being a hassle I haven't been able to find.
Height is a parameter mentioned by most women angling for the 'right man' Guys, abandon the quest your beloved, in the offing, is actually a high energy reducing force
"A man is only loved under the condition that he provides something."
- Chris Rock
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
What a sad and poor attitude
Rock is an idiot. Why would anyone, man or woman want to be with someone that provides nothing?
Does anyone? know, was he home schooled?
@@toygiants8748 Do you think that disrespecting a super successful and obviously intelligent man like Chris Rock makes you look good?
@@PendeltonWhiskey Pull your head out of Rocks ass and enjoy the day.
*Understanding what you bring to the table and not being afraid to walk away from situations that don’t serve you is huge.*
One minute in " if being yourself worked you wouldn't be single". Brilliant. I laughed aloud.
Sense of humour: check! 👏
But later on w are advised to 'authentic'; so what is the difference?
She thinks women are the prize. If you believe that you have much to learn.
@@1Skeptik1 LOL they are though, like a jungle hunt 😆
Life is a wild journey through nature. Rough terrain, if they end up on an adventure with you, that’s pretty much what chicks really want.
Remember Wayne’s world ? … Garth Algar has the greatest advice ever in the first one.
Was it Heather Locklear and he did foxy lady with the jukebox (Dana Carvey 💯 awesome)
Finally it’s revealed that he actually “was” in a relationship with her and he goes like this he goes …. Women want you to come get them… In fact, they love it. Not exactly what he says but she looks at him and wink.
I’ve had some interesting friends throughout my life short, fat friends with bombshell girlfriends wait a minute, let me rephrase that wives, and they act like teammates because they are.
Or even better watch those remodeling reality, shows and look at those dudes and then look at their wives.
Or storage wars the German guy especially he kind of talks like a baby because he has some weird German accent. He’s kind of a Toby guy kind of adorable LOL but yeah check out his wife.
I think you can look them up and they are a dream couple. She literally loves him till death.
Also, noticed these guys don’t act like they’re gonna cheat on them, there’s no need for them to feel that way.
When it’s right it’s right…right as rain.
The same criticism towards a man's personality and approach to dating also applies to women. Whether the woman believes in equality or not, they are not better than us men. They use our sex drive against us to gain control but men need to learn how to do without and use the magical all-powerful word, boycotting, which also works with being a consumer. Gentlemen, never simp for the sake of getting laid. Just like Spock said in that Star Trek movie, Desiring something in fantasy is much more pleasurable then actually having it.
Turns out that one spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage ...
My Canadian buddy Dan once accidentally texted his wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.”
* Moscow, Russia
lol! 🤣
That's hilarious
Hi beautiful
- Mom, I'm dating the neighbor ...
- But he could be your father, dear ...
- Age doesn't matter to me, Mom ...
- I don't think you understand, honey ...
* Moscow, Russia
hahahahahha good one, bro
Ha!!!
😂😂😂
@@draltamimi
First of all it's tOvarish ...
Second of all, I was born 10 years after this form of address went out of use in this country ...
So just plain muzhik, bratan, druzhishe or chuvak would do ... )))
@@SteelFanther The "о" is not stressed so it's pronounced more like an "а", but yes that is the transliteration.
A very enlightening video! Much of what you said describes me. You get in a rut that is hard to get out of. Get up go to work, come home tired, almost too tired to make anything to eat, so heat up pre made batches of food made from freezer. Watch TV, go on computer, go to bed, repeat 5 days a week. Weekend you spend time doing the errands that you cannot do or have energy to do during the week. Groceries, laundry, banking etc. Of course being 63 years old is not an asset either. Time, money, are key factors needed. Time being probably the most important. After awhile you become introverted to a point of being a hermit.
Start by committing to 15 min a day after work to do something that will move you forward in a positive way. Choose only one thing or you won't stick with it. Maybe it's body weight exercises. When it's a habit, add something. You'll end up with more energy and make better dinner choices. You can do it!
Great comment !!! I am the same as you Nick. I'm only 59 but that's pretty much my life. I do go to the gym daily. I just completed 14 years of care taking for my parents. Now that they are both gone. I have begun to get back into the dating world. Wow has it changed. I think it has passed me by.
Make the gym part of your life. Everyday or every second day. You will feel much better. I got wealthy years ago so don't have to work. Was married ,have kids the whole thing. I dated a couple of American w-m-n and that was enough I don't need drama in my life and 99% of single women over 40 are train wreaks. I book a flight to Thailand 3 times a year for about a month each time. And have fun. If you look for single women in the U.S. you will either have to lower your standards way down or you will waste alot of time with the entitled masculine American w-m-n. If you fish in a swamp full of sucker fish that is what you will catch.
@@briar35981 Get your passport.
Too many games 🤦♂️
It doesn’t matter what you do or how you think.
The best time to have a relationship was 30 years ago.
After having moved on from listening to “red pill” “manosphere” content creators, I’d say the best thing they have done for me is getting many men to remove themselves as my competition by making them bitter and paranoid towards women and relationships.
@@deneseepaul6882 if you don’t think you have competition, you are wrong. Chad hasnt given up, and you will never compete with chad
@@deneseepaul6882 I’ve met soo many people that are not bitter or negative. Go in with an open mind and she switches out of nowhere. Society now is all about ghosting and situationships. I think me are realizing they are better off single than chasing something that is real one day and gone the next.
@@Mistah_Boombastic_BiggieCheese lol, see what I’m talking about ☝️
@@deneseepaul6882 come to me after you get constantly rejected for Chad and tyrone. I will never be proven wrong about anything I believe
"Is she right enough for me" may be the most useful part of this whole video.- as far as I'm concerned at least. Not that I disagree with the rest.
Glad you found a nugget of value!
It's a good call. "Right enough for me". There are no "perfect" for me women. "For me", the only one who's evaluation counts (besides hers).
"Just be yourself" The absolute worst advice my dad ever gave me. Wasted years of my life finding out that wasn't the case 😢
They usually mean well. Use your knowledge now. :)
If beeing yourself seemed to be wrong who would you pretend to be to have more success? I don't understand what's wrong with being yourself if that means to be authentic and honest.
@@masterofdesaster8610 If being yourself means being soft and insecure you've already lost. Project self confidence even if you have to force yourself to do it. Self confidence (and I don't mean arrogance or meanness) is catnip for women
@@PendeltonWhiskey ...and vice versa. As a woman I like confident men and I know men like confident women. And being yourself is the shortes way to get rid of incompatible people.
Number 2 will still affect your ability to get a date, being tall rich and fit makes dating a lot easier
owning an airplane helps
get enough money and fit enough. for height, find out how to gain respect of other men despite your height
The biggest problem I have is politics. I am a conservative man living in California. I'm financially secure and decent shape reasonably handsome, but when women find out about my politics they lose interest. I am not getting involved with any more liberal women, and she definitely cannot be an atheist. Those are pretty core values I will not compromise on.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback and pray that you receive the woman who is truly best for you, the woman God has for you 🙏
Hi Anthony,
I'm British but have visited the US.
Do you need to be exactly where you are? California is full of conservatives once you go south of LA (Orange County, San Diego etc.). You know that Ronald Reagan was a governor there, and Richard Nixon a senator?
Either that or hop over the state border to Nevada - plenty of conservatives there too. I stayed in Boulder City (near the Hoover Dam) and the local library took the National Review (this was when Bill Buckley and Joe Sobran wrote for it, so I'm dating myself here).
Can you find them in the more rural areas? The story of California's decline is so depressing.
You must live in southern California. Move to a Red State and enjoy all the hot conservative women.
sure but don't have sex with them cause abortion is tabo and you'll be paying for at least 18 years. Keep it in your pants with the red tie wearing girls unless you find the unicorn
Exactly. The problem with the advice “just be yourself” isn’t that it’s false, but that it is incomplete.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
Heres best advice for women, be young, dont argue, keep in shape, be a compliment to his life, have a low body count. Done
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
I tend to dismiss and despise dating and relationship advice online but this was actually very good.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
Good point at 6:45. Chasing validation from others always left me feeling empty.
Zactly!
Thanks dear Anna . To achieve this you must have a pleasant masculine face, be handsome and slender. The rest will follow without difficulty.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
at 68 I could not imagine dating now, not interested in older women, quit at 46, tired of the stress and not looking for marriage
All things will unfold once you understand your God-given purpose in life and are pursuing it. May it be so for you!
How are you supposed to figure our your purpose in life. They say God has a plan for everyone but most don't live long enough to hear what it is. He don't talk to people either. What were they smoking to be hearing voices.....wow.
I lie about my height all the time because six foot is so much easier to say than five foot eleven and three-quarters, and most women here don't understand what 182 cm means. Now that I think about it, I'm probably more interested in the women who do know what 182 cm is.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
I happen to be exactly six feet tall and I don't envy anyone taller than me. Even at six feet which isn't unusual I've banged my head on things more times than my not so good memory can remember. I wouldn't have minded being a bit shorter just not so short that I'd need a big pickup truck to bolster my insecurity about being short
Being yourself works! You can't fake honesty, which is the most attractive quality.
in her videos, which instruct us on how to attract women, it only proves that women aren't worth attracting. (lol).
Even someone who is negative, addicted, out-of-shape, victim-mentality, women-hating, broke AF can attract someone...but it might not be who they want. But yes, honesty (without cruelty) is attractive to the right person!
@@YourWingmamand, what exactly makes you think that we're all out-of-shape, poor, addicts? Many of us don't even personally care about relationships. We're more concerned about the future of our civilization. And, whether or not women can change for the better while it still matters.
Dear Anna:
Ouch on the "just be yourself" piece of advice, but I really appreciate the honesty. So, if we were on a date, or dating , you would appreciate my passion in talking about one of my favorite subjects, the American Civil War? A "yes" answer would be such a turn on.
Thank you so much for this video. It really is sad how much we are influenced by everything we hear, and you are correct, all our shortcomings in life are our fault and nobody else's.
Anyway, I am off to working on myself, great day for a run. I hope you have a great Sunday and an amazing week. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful smile with us today. Hug and a peck on each cheek. See you next week.
The right lady will be engaged by whatever brings you joy! Minor edit (more positive): Our shortcomings in life are our *responsibility* and nobody else's. Have a great week!
@@YourWingmam Our shortcomings are the fault of our biological parents.
I haven't had much joy from being a model railway person.@@YourWingmam
I'm loving the new animated Anna!
It's been too long since I watched one of your videos. Must be something about the UA-cam algorithms.
Welcome back! And thank you!
@YourWingmam Thanks! You always make me smile with your wit, common sense, and insights. You are definitely the type of person I like to be arou.
Good women are so damn scarce when you get to my age it's unreal. I know only 4 single women in their 50's and would not date them if my life depended on it.
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
The True Better self, points some of them I do for me. The healthier you is one: My health is tops no matter what. the inner inspiration : I am about 50/50 on that some improvement. The self growth, I have made a list, but seem to keep procrastinating too much or not focused. I need to find my niche on a career that is better , the day job pays the bills but makes me sick and is not healthy environment. I guess I am proud of my passions and can be me. You have to act natural not any put on false facades to impress anyone. If they cannot like you for who you are then they are not really genuine to start off with.
Start with one thing. Either the easiest or the one that will move the needle the most. Commit to 15 min a day until it's a habit. It will have a ripple effect. When there's too many things on the list it feels impossible to start. :)
Hello Anna how are you. First of all I like the background where you filmed for this video. So, lot of people had told me since I was little to be "yourself" even if their are full of flaws and bad habits in my life. We have to be our better self like you said and that's what which will get us positive in our life. We have to be healthy first both physically and mentally. We have to stop worrying about the things which happened in the past. Yes, we have to make the steps to be our true and better self. You helped me a lot and thank you for that. Thank you for the video as well Anna ❤. You are my good friend dear Anna.
Glad you appreciate the location setting and glad you've found value in my videos! 💞
"Be yourself". I fell for this advice from women my entire life. I think women don't understand self-improvement, and mostly don't understand their own instincts, and what drives what they look for,
Agreed!
Thanks for being straight-forward Anna!
Anna, you are so damn right. I always be your true self. It go back to self-identity. most people have problems with self-identity. people think their identity are associated with other person.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
I like your delivery, the gestures and intonation are perfect.
So pleasant.....and sometimes thei intentional wink wink expressions are so hilarious 😁
She is a keeper😅
I think it's good you challenge the assumption behind the phrase "Be Yourself". Being yourself is good only if you have good habits and principles and only if you are striving to become a better person than before. Seeing jocks with big muscles flexing high value material possessions and succeeding in life and with women can make you lose hope because their standard can seem right, but there is a better standard out there. By normalizing negative societal norms, it's easy to become hopeless due to how unfulfilling they are. So, that's why it's important to not give up and remember what is truly right.
Well said! Unless she’s super fit or and gold digger and under 25 most women don’t want gym obsessed or flashy guys. Seriously.
The best advice is to stop basing your happiness on women, then you're happy no matter what.
Anna,you are my wingman,you saved me as man,and at the same time destroyed me .
You opened my eyes,but now,i cant do more than cry for not knowing you 10 years ago.
Two weeks ago i discovered and saw 3 of your vids about flirting.........suddenly i understand all, i understand women,i remembered many acts,behaviours of girls......and all has sense. I passed from bad felling against women to LOVE ALL women,because now,i understand em . But, im 42 years old (everybody says that i look younger),i Lost 20 years of my LIVE,first for my cowardice with the girl Who i liked, second,the las 10 years for my hostility fellings against all women......Now i see the oportunities that some girls,specially one Who i loved, gived me........i can do nothing more than cry. I always was a family man,my dream was to be with my loved girl, and have childs.......Now,i dont know if i Will have this,and of course,i Will never have this innocent youngs love.
Love you Anna for opening my eyes.
There’s still time! Maybe not with girls of the past but perhaps someone even more suitable for you now. Try not to think of it as wasted time but a long learning journey. Work on what you can and the tears will dry up, and your life will change. 🫂
@@YourWingmam thanks Anna. (And sorry for my english,isnt my first lenguaje,Im european) now i started makeing myself better,trying to fix my weak points. People always told me that Im Happy and handsome, every girls of the past looks happy when see me,but my insecurity (only whith girls that i liked) always made me a "friend". Soo, i worked on this ,now y can maintain eye contact on girls , i look more secure ,"fake It till make It" and i perceibed changes on girls and on me. I Will try your program.
You are the only mentor on a entire world who actually made me understand women,and after understand women i understand myself as a man,thanks,because i feel that without this i would be a child forever.
A man cant be a man without a woman and viceversa,web are a binary system.
@@YourWingmam sorry for looking so enthusiast,but all my life changed in one day for seeing 3 vids,your vids,you made my mind blowing,and isnt easy. I feel blessed now. I only wish to this happened years ago,i would be now with a loved girl and 2 or 3 childs.
Someone once said to me "Closure is something you do for yourself, you don't need someone else to allow for YOUR closure "
Deciding to be yourself is along the same lines; but I like the idea of "Be your better self"
First off .....you don't have to justify to us the audience about the background. If people think you're going to dress up in warm clothing to stand indoors in front of a green screen , then not only are they small-minded , but also they are naive ..... and yes , it's awesome looking .
However , I am a little biased in that the eastern provinces are my preferred cup of tea ! Not too far east though.
This video was awesome , out of all your videos Anna.
Love how you have taken your material for this one from real life feedback it seems.
Regardless who a person is , whether you're a man or woman , we can all improve on one thing at very minimum about ourselves .
Life for each person is a work in progress.
Sometimes people need to not throw in the towel in relationships so quickly in some cases..... in other situations sometimes the problem is themselves and they don't even realize it. I can honestly say I learned something about myself over the last few years . Often my actions were a result of a learned behavior from parents.... as was the case with me and I'm sure is the case with many people .
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree ....often !
Wonderful self-reflection! #progressnotperfection :))
@@YourWingmam
Thank you.... I genuinely appreciate that
A nice pep talk today. Chase down your better self and see if Anna's advice works for you!
This gal keeps it real ..honest advice ...listen up guys it's never too late to learn..knowledge is power. Stay blessed my friend
❤️ 🙂 Thank you!
From the outset, I recognized that this video would be like the first few sentences of a really good sermon; a presentation that I recognized immediately would need to be listened to again in order to receive the full benefit of the overwhelming insights. Therefore, my mind wandered to details during the first watch: 3:03 The cat appeared; 3:59 The cat disappeared; 4:42 "suspend disbelief that change is possible," implied a depth of understanding that few other commentators have; 7:41 "embracing agency." Agency is a much neglected concept in the philosophy of governance. You are to be commended for bringing this concept to the understanding of relationships.
Thank you for understanding the insights! (Hopefully, I wasn't too preachy.) :)
Hi Anna, Fantastic you dropped in a couple of refs to spiritual alchemy and calcination. I thought of the poem Noche Oscura by San Juan de la Cruz. Hope you’re enjoying the cacao. Hugs and a blessed journey
Spiritual alchemy, calcination. Have to admit, I had to look them up. Thanks for the new words! ✨
Thank you for your sound advice! I can say that it adds up pretty quickly. Especially the part about becoming your true best self. Becoming magnetic. The law of doing as it applies to the law of attraction directly!
Thank you, Anna for your invaluable tough love. I’ve been inspired by it and today I got to do a four minute interview by phone with the great Brian Lara of national public radio NYC in New York and I got to talk about memories of my New Jersey shore life with my family and meeting Bruce Springsteen in Stone pony in 1973 before anybody in New Jersey of the world knew him and actually sitting at his table and drinking beers with him Now you tribute the confidence to call the radio station to some of the great advice I got from you over the last week or two so thank you. We love you.
I meant that I attribute my newfound confidence to listening to your wonderful podcast. That’s all I was trying to say OK peace out. Thank you for the great advice stay healthy and well and keeping inspiring us little caveman all the Beatles. Love you.
I'm happy my content has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
You make really solid points and often I am grateful when I feel “ thankfully this one doesn’t apply to my quest.” I am never satisfied with what I do others maybe which I admit feels good but for me nothing is ever complete I always feel I can do better. When I see her we will both know. Waiting ,GB
I pray that you receive the woman who is truly best for you, the woman God has for you ❤ 🙏
Hey. Thanks. Psychology suggests that "being yourself" (authenticity) is the only way to have a healthy relationship. I tried to change for a woman. It didn't work. It's too much effort. Even if you land one, you'll have to maintain the charade to keep her. Do you. Don't settle. Actually, it seems narcissism works. Do that. 😛
Never change for someone else. Only you.
Every man needs to watch this video IMO. You just gave the best advice to men I've ever heard, in great detail, and in only ten minutes.
Really, it's good advice for women too. Such men do not want 2 dimensional women after all. Such people are the only ones who ever have happy and healthy relationships.
Glad you enjoyed it! Please share it. :)) 🙏🥰
I have been working on and accomplishing your six steps for a "True Better Self." Still, when women conclude I have never had a girl friend, they do a 180 and ignore me. I am 73 and dealing with an older demographic. Income level is the #2 factor in interest ceasing. The women I can talk to are either married or have friend zoned me..
Glad I could help 🙏
0:39 Thank you for covering this! So true!
2:35 That's annoying because then that sets the stage that he's probably shorter than he is, when some of them do tell the truth
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Hi doc the love game is just that a challenge game , 1) we need to beat attracted to them. 2)check out close up view grooming cleanliness 3)the quality of conversations 4)do they contradict themselves and lie 5) check out where they live and how they live . So if everything is cool basically time will tell and hopefully she is bearable or totally lovable 6) don’t rush it take time ok ,then have those will you marry me discussion , if he or she hesitate to answer this ask another question when and if you receive an even more Vague answer, start thinking about who gets to take what and go each other’s ways, because he or she who you were, asking, is obviously not as committed as you , chin up, have another go. I’m afraid this is the love game. If you’re after a wambam thank you mam or guy just Exaggerate , your gorgeous , you have great dress sense , I love your smile , plaster them with drinks cross your fingers and hope for the best and you might be lucky that’s my advice leave the hate out of it , it will only make matters worse.
Good to see the scenery and good advice.
I had also thought, "be yourself" is bad advice. A lady would be bored stiff, if I was myself. I have wondered if people got tired of me talking about my love for Shania Twain (I'm seeing her twice in July), and the band I crowdfund.
Shania Twain has become an in-joke at work, and I call her my girlfriend, but she doesn't know it.
Strange thing happened on my dating site. A lady sent me a "like". I looked at her profile, only said she loves to travel. I sent her a message, asking where was her favourite place to travel to. She blocked me!
Another lady, 3 weeks ago blocked me after I sent a message in response to her interests.
Most ladies I send a message, don't reply. Only takes one lady to be the right lady, she's out there somewhere.
Any woman who blocks an innocent message like that wasn't worth knowing! As for bands, focus more on the band you crowdfunded, way more interesting.
@@YourWingmam Ok, thanks. Good point about the lady.
The band is doing great, they were invited to The Brits - UK's music equal to The Oscars.
Really like the genuineness of Anna. All good advice. Got on this train (becoming a better version of yourself) years ago and haven’t looked back. It works.
Thank you and high five!
When they say be yourself, I take as being your authentic self, not whatever one is doing when one is in a toxic relationship.
Wow! Anna is an Aristotelian! Teleological approach to dating advice! You go!
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Of course be yourself, but that means not self-editing yourself to please women and instead being true to yourself, but being a better self, being on a constant path of self improvement for you.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
You crack me up - I really enjoy your approach on the subject of acceptance of self, and love!
Being autistic, “just be yourself” was, by far, the worst advice (such as it is) I’ve ever been given on any subject. In order to get anywhere in life, I’ve had to mask my true self so as to come across as neurotypical as I’m capable. Which is not to say that I’m fake or inauthentic. It just means that I have to calibrate the interaction and keep my guard up a bit
Your awesome, I love watching all your videos and listening to your advice. Thank you so much xoxo
You can be your better self, your best self, and still endure rejection or miss out on the one you really desire. There are no guarantees, as we can never totally influence the desires of another person.
Be yourself. Be your best self, even. Never lose hope. But have no expectations.
Truth
Thank you sincerely, Anna, for reminding me to like myself. I've struggled with that for years now, but that is the wellspring of true vonfidence,
Love your insights Anna, you give me hope for the future. Cheers from Melbourne Oz. ❤
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
Anna is a dynamo with a coherent message, delivered with skills better that most motivational speakers, great sincerity and often in scenic venues.
Wow, thank you so much!
Maybe the realest video, and best video on dating advice I've seen, and I've been seeing many for a while
Thank you for appreciating!
Wow. Relationships seem like really hard. I'm nearing 30, and the sound of using my time and money for things I like (books, games, gym, music) sound more and more appealing
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
love the outdoor settings
... great way to change gears
and keep up the genuine tone
even tho your prior work is
also great viewing/wisdom
Don't care if being myself doesn't work. I outright refuse to be anything other than authentic. if they don't like me as I am then they aren't the one. if that means there aren't any for me that's fine. I'm not going to lie to myself, and her, just to not be alone. Take me as I am nor not at all. The fact is I am boring, stubborn and weird. lol Traits that people put up with but not ones they seek out.
If it’s working for you in your life regardless of anyone else, don’t change. :)
Thanks for your help and support.
Anna, please give some examples about how we don't have to be ourselves. Perhaps you can use some things that your boyfriend uses on you?
Suppose your boyfriend isn't being himself, to attract and keep you. Then you get married and maybe have a kid. Then he starts showing his real self, which is something you didn't want and don't find attractive. You grow apart and now you're looking at a second divorce. Well duhhhh. Now you have an innocent child tossed in this toxicity and chaos. I have to stop now, this is getting too messy. I'm going to make myself some hot chocolate.
Final thought: Anna, how much are you not being yourself with your boyfriend?
Zig Ziglar - 'We all need a daily checkup from the neck up to avoid stinkin' thinkin' which ultimately leads to hardening of the attitudes.'
You're absolutely right!
Stay hard!
De plane...de plane! Lot's of great information...Thank you.
Lol
I can see how someone who doesn't know your work could get stuck on the "don't be yourself" statement early on. The first thought to come to mind was, "Wait, I'm supposed to be fake?" But the second thought was "She's going down the Best Self trail" which is, of course, spot on. If you take more heat than usual for this video, it could easily be from guys who tuned out before 5 minutes were up. Your topics were on-point today. My big one is weight loss; I put on pounds trying to fix meals for the granddaughter with the narrow appetite whom I'm now raising (working on expanding her palate, but it's a slow climb!). I find myself wondering how much of the Anna energy is from caffeine and how much is from the stimulating BC chill in the air (betting on the latter). Praying for you! -- Russ P PS/Ginger seems to be healing well from her spaying. Now, at least, Tyson shouldn't totally lose his mind because she went into heat. I prefer him sane, thank you. ;)
Hopefully, most will be curious enough to watch the rest, but if not they may not be ready for it anyway (and that's ok). As for fussy teen appetites, all too common, I feel for you! But awareness of how it's impacting your health is good. #caffeineforthewin #sanepupsforthewin lol Thank you, Russ!
You don't have to be Rich, Tall, and have a six pack..... but it helps a lot.
Most definitely!
Apparently being tall is a factor because I seem to be too short for some women. I'm only 5' 3 and a half. I'd have to be like 5 8 or taller to get the kind of woman I want. 😔 I'm sorry I'm down. Just a tough week, but it's getting better. 😊 Awesome video ⭐⭐⭐ ⭐⭐ five stars! You are totally spot on about everything and I'm learning so much! Keep the videos coming! 😊
You have an open mind! You’re miles ahead already. Work on what you can and the right woman will appreciate you. I know a guy who’s 5’ being chased by a cute 5’4” blonde. He’s not rich, but he’s got moxie! Let him be an inspiration.
@@YourWingmam oh wow!! Don't I wish!!! Lol! But seriously thank you! I appreciate the encouragement. It helps a lot! 😊
I love the backgrounds you choose and how you put your videos together. I'm a filmmaker myself you know and I'm always trying to figure out just how you do it, ha. Well done
Thank you! Sometimes it takes hours to find the right locations. :)
Thanks for the advice and the enthusiasm.
My pleasure ❤️
Being a tall man and being a woman with large breasts.
2 things that are not important but some of us sure think they are.
True!
Amazing! Clear as mud Anna😂 So i can sell dating band aids and be rich. I enjoyed this video Anna. Love to see you smile.
Oh dear. Maybe watching again will help? Glad you enjoyed it anyway!
@@YourWingmam
Lol
She talks quick so we are riveted to our seats 😁
Really Appreciated your effort to make video at a peaceful place.Love and Respect for you mam
Wingmaam expresses her personality at the end. Very cute 😊
❤️ 🙂 Thank you for watching. I appreciate your feedback!
I found what works best attracting woman is to be tall, dark and handsome....well, two outa three ain't bad....lol
Confidence beats all three.
@@calebz5890 false
@@calebz5890
I have to agree .....
Fact , I have known guys with not so great looks that have awesome looking girl friends .... not trophy women as they are called , but really genuine good looking women . I was certain it was because of their innate confidence.
When I started dating looking for my person about 5 ish years ago , I knew I wasn't going to get anywhere allowing women to pick me. Not that I am less than average .
So I initiated everything .... the first communication , etc everything from the start .
I decided , on each of the first dates thst I should be the one to ask most of the questions , Attempt ( regardless how hard it was for me ) to direct the conversation , but also showing interest , demonstrate the qualities I am looking for by asking all these questions .
Before starting out I knew it wasn't going to benefit me to hope that the conversation was going to be 50 / 50 , so I took all the lead and if there was conversational reciprocation I would let it occur. Which of course is what I wanted to happen anyway.
Long story short , by attempting to ""act"" confident, I became confident . I told myself they are just a person , no better or worse than myself. From attempting to act confident I not only became confident on those first dates / interviews , but I also found it a LOT LESS stressful to go on future first dates .
I soon discovered the obvious ... you can't judge a book by its cover , meaning them. So often the ones that at first glance in their bios seemed like "" under dogs"" would actually be high achievers , and sometimes vice versa .
One thing I do know , with my attempts at being highly confident on first dates , it would turn the other person into a very accepting person of me. As long as I wasn't making any judgements of them , they would open up willing with a smile like they were talking with an old friend . From there I could decide if a second date was in my best interest .
@@calebz5890 no it doesn’t.
This dating advice is a game-changer! 🔥
I love BC, and I learn so much from you.
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
Love you Sis. Palm Sunday Holy Week.
Right now i'm going with "be myself". I don't think it will give me any success, but after 3 decades of "change, change, change! I'm not good enough as i am" i've got enough. I'm 45 with no success whatsoever with women. Enough is enough..
What did you change?
@@YourWingmam Some things. e.g:
- I have learnt to speak, as I was a very strong stutterer until I was 30. I am now very good in the local German dialect, but not yet in foreign languages (e.g. English or French).
- I had acquired hobbies with lots of social contacts. However, I've put these aside again and I'm back to my original interests: hiking and fishing.
- I went out a lot in the evenings. Concerts, events, meetings with friends. but now I'm spending more time outdoors again at the nearby lake or in the mountains.
- I have tried to improve my demeanour in social situations. This has also worked and has been very helpful at work.
- I've tried everything I can think of in singles apps, but it's no good.
As a result, in terms of women... I can talk to women very well. Older ladies (20-30 years older than me) also like me very much because I am polite, very tall (1.96m), educated (I am an engineer) and have a decent figure.
However, women in my age range still avoid me and I have never made it to a second date.
@@YourWingmam Some things. e.g:
- I have learnt to speak, as I was a very strong stutterer until I was 30. I am now very good in the local German dialect, but not yet in foreign languages (e.g. English or French).
- I had acquired hobbies with lots of social contacts. However, I've put these aside again and I'm back to my original interests: hiking and fishing.
- I went out a lot in the evenings. Concerts, events, meetings with friends. but now I'm spending more time outdoors again at the nearby lake or in the mountains
@@YourWingmam I have tried to improve my demeanour in social situations. This has also worked and has been very helpful at work.
- I've tried everything I can think of in singles apps, but it's no good.
As a result, in terms of women... I can talk to women very well. ladies (20-30 years older than me) also like me very much because I am polite, very tall (1.96m), educated (I am an engineer) and have a decent figure.
However, women in my age range is still avoid me and I have never made it to a second date
Dear Anna, great content as always!!! Many thanks and best wishes!
be yourself means ... dont pretend to be someone else ... making yourself ... more social or ... less isolated is not quite in the same wheel house ... you have to be social, you can be better .. but you really cant be "someone you are not"
Good advice, Anna, though I do question you on saying in bad advice be yourself and then say as good advice being your true self.
One has to remember that many women out there are working and is use to be living in a certain lifestyle and profession, especially when you are older.
You have to get out there and enjoy dome after work activities also.
Tell funny stories and tales of work and your adventures.
Be positive and when things are tough, put a good spin on it.
Saturday night I went Tango dancing at two different locations for 7 hours. Looking back, I am guessing that I danced for 5 of those hours at least. ( recovering on Sunday) so figure out 10-12 minutes per 3 song set that is dancing 25-30 times. Yes, I danced with a few women twice, but I was not turned down once in all of the time I was out there.
What does that have to do with what Anna said?
I got to chat with the women out there while dancing and at times in between the dances. I told them a bit about myself on work and other activities that I do. It puts me out there for when I see them again, I get a smile, a hug, and a chat before and after I dance with them.
Yes, there were some ladies that I did not dance well with.
Yes, some of the ladies are married. Or prefer women.
Yes, some of those ladies were in their early thirties, or in their mid 70's+.
Yes, some of those ladies were very good looking 👍👍👍.
I am putting myself out there, and when I am dancing well, enjoying it.
Love it! And I'll bet the more women you've asked the less scary it is. As for be yourself and be your better self, they are two different things..sorry I wasn't able to be clear enough in those differences. :)
Thanks, Anna. It all depends on my 'dancing'
There are some times I feel that I brought my hiking legs to the dance floor instead of my dancing legs. When that happens, I become spectator or just leave early.
you gotta be yourself to a certain extent, because if you change who you are then you wont be happy in the long wrong because a woman wont know who you actually are
🙏 ❤️
I don't even know who I am, being ,myself' feels strange, speaking my own language feels artificial, I feel at ease only when they give me a role to play, bc being myself is like getting lost in endless space, which part of that I am I just don't know
A few years ago I helped a divorced woman get back to a sound financial state with her investments - I gave her lots of good advise and encouragement over 5 years - One day I asked her for some dating advise - She was so BRUTAL with her comments - Calling me VERY BORING - It was like we were married and she wanted a divorce - It really HURT - She was a divorced Chinese American with one daughter - Thanks Nancy for being such a good friend ?
I'm sorry to hear about that. I pray that you heal from all that you have been through and be able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
I wasn't able to date until now,which is much later in life. My question is this, When I meet someone they always seem to ask if everything works below the belt, when I tell them the truth that it doesn't,they stop all communication,What should I do?
If you’re meeting on dating apps subtly put that in your profile. Example “More interested in cuddles than carnal activities.” You’ll get fewer matches but already filtered for that.
@@YourWingmam Thank you
Anna simplified it in points
But the conclusion is the same - its complex with what women want from men
That's often an unhappy reality most men face with their own women
Basically become Superman 🦸♂️/Clark Kent but still Lois Lane wasn't happy
Or become Batman/Bruce Wayne but still Rachel chooses Harvey Dent 😂😂😂😂😂
Then settle for your own personal Selina Kyle - if you find her - what a comedy 😂😂😂😂😂
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
thank you wingmam, i know my discomfort zone and am willing to face it and destroy it
👏🫶🙌
I don't say negative things about dating American women to stop men from trying to date them. I say it because good modern single women are very rare and unless you are will to spend alot of time looking or willing to settle for much less then you deserve. You are far better off booking a flight to another country where you are valued. And the women have the qualities that would compliment your life. I know so many guys that got divorced from American women. And now they have a GF or a wife from another country and they seem much happier.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Very good video. Best thing I did was ditch the online and got out in the real world. Still single because I will not settle but definitely alot more quality dates and I'm having a ball trying.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Regarding the disclaimer at the start. "Better the wounds from a friend than the kisses from the enemy". Don't worry about it.
Terrible advice #2: can confirm this is bad. I am 6'2", financially stable, have been told I'm "not unattractive" ... and still single.
I pray that you receive the partner who is truly best for you, the partner God has for you ❤ 🙏
It's so easy to just get a woman. But most guys are not looking for just any woman, they want that special one who's out of reach and that's why they stay single and so be it. This is true for women as well. So don't sweat it if you don't wanna settle for less. It's better to be single than to be miserable and be in a relationship just because. There is one truth that she talks about and that is don't try to impress others, don't let the culture control your mindset. There are so many things you can do just hanging out with friends or doing sports.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
Lady you scary me with this "do not be yourself", but i get your point :D of course it is not always works if someone is addicted to something for example.
I have lived and traveled around the world. I have totally given up on Western women! I now only date Latina and Asian women. That have traditional values ingrained in them from childhood.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
I am 6'5" but sometimes worry girl thinks I'm too tall because I like short girls.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback 🙏
I'm not the richest, tallest, most muscular, handsome-est?, funniest (actually I'm witty), most intelligent (but close), have some defects and insecurities but you put me around women of all legal ages, sizes and colors (18 to 88 years old) and they will eventually want a piece of me or all 😂 why? because I can sense deep needs and meet them. The problem is, can they meet my needs? 1)Affection, and 2) can they not be a hassle? Affection they can sometimes meet but not being a hassle I haven't been able to find.
Ah, so your task is to train them! ;) We teach people how to treat us.
The best advice i got from this channel is tell her that safety is the most important thing to you
I'm glad you got something and that's a good one!
Thank you Anna😊
Good advice. Thank you.
My pleasure ❤️
Height is a parameter mentioned by most women angling for the
'right man'
Guys, abandon the quest your beloved, in the offing, is actually a high energy reducing force
Focus on improving your life *for you* and not hiding who you really are.