i think it would be really interesting to have an episode of sex workers versus ex sex workers. i believe that would provide a lot more perspective on how sex work affects people who get involved in it.
Also different kinds of sex workers. I'm happy they choose their work that way, it should be like the. But is not the case for all sex workers. But of course, is difficult to find forced sex workers for this kind of dynamic, the pimp wouldn't allow it
I wish there was a virgin on this episode that was a virgin due to choice not necessarily religion. That would've given another interesting perspective
Yes, I'm atheist virgin I'm over forty, ex lingerie model just to give some background. I chose a non piv sx lifestyle as a woman, but I've been with thousands of men. I'm also an ex sx worker.
Yes, but they chose religious virgins bc they have the opposite stance of sex workers. An atheist virgin for example wouldn't have any problem with sex work, making for a boring discussion. They try to have ppl from opposite ends of the spectrum to see if they can discuss and find any middle ground.
This is one of the most mutually respected videos I've watched on middle ground. Neither side was harshly judging anyone and they were laughing and learning together.
I think it's because they don't belong in "opposite groups" like other video where it's "that VS anti-that". Here, it's just people with different way of living their lives, they don't think necessarily that the other group is in the wrong, they just don't want to live like them
Also I think both groups might face a lot of criticism in their private lives, so I feel like they are more understanding to people facing similar experiences in that area
I found the idea of “not everyone should watch porn” interesting as it made me think of my friends who just shouldn’t watch horror movies as it really affects them negatively (like literally makes them anxious and paranoid etc..)
I love that they talked about that. How porn is just entertainment not reality and how it has a negative effect on people. I always felt like a prude or left out to admit that I dont like watching it
This goes to the heart of so many things. Porn is a tool. It can be used well. It can be abused. Simply because some people abuse it, doesn’t mean no one should have access to it or the tool is inherently bad. In the same way as there’s bad and unethical porn, some tolls are badly made some are not. But it doesn’t mean the tool is inherently bad and should be banned.
@@MikeCruzable This is false. Pornography is inherently destructive. It’s not just entertainment. Some things belong in the privacy of a bedroom away from the eyes of the world. This is one of them.
@@katethegreat4918 it might be false for YOU but it is not objectively false. Many couple - married and not married - have benefited from using porn as a tool. Many people with various medical conditions or people in a variety of situations have benefited from it. It’s also helpful for the occasional entertainment for some people. What’s unhealthy is obsessive use, addiction, or extreme or unethical porn exposure to people who are undereducated or too young, or porn paired with bad sex education/bad parenting. But again, like any tool, this is true. This is also true of most medical drugs, this is also true of marihuana, alcohol, and cigarettes. This is also true of exercise, or eating, or shopping. This is even true of religion as we all know what cults and fundamentalism can create. Excess and abuse is one thing, the tool is something else.
Agreed. This Made their side of the argument Stale . I always Pause these Videos in between different prompts and Try to check and form an opinion & in This Episode The Virgin side didn't gave me any fruitful inputs.
Tbh, almost 90% of people that are virgins are that because of religion. Others are probably virgins because they can't get laid ( incels) it'll be really difficult to find a person that isn't a virgin because of religion.
I agree. For a lot of people, they're virgins because it just hasn't happened yet. For me, I don't want to engage in sex until I find someone that I have a strong emotional bond with. That doesn't mean they're gonna be my forever person, but I have to be emotionally attracted to them. And that hasn't happened yet for me
I kinda wish the "virgin" side was not only for religious reasons but were for identities like asexuality and being able to see what different perspectives on intimacy could be.
@@noemisadventures206 I think they just worded it badly. They probably mean being a virgin by choice because of asexuality. Generally speaking you can be asexual and have sex anyways, but then again why would you want to?
I mean it could be interesting to see perspectives. I'm not saying it based off of "choice" of being a virgin or difficulty level of anything but it could level a view of how folks view sex.
It would have been interesting to have this discussion with sex workers and people who are virgins for a non religious reason. I guess it's a different discussion but it would be really interesting
agreed, nearly every episode of Middle Ground has some religious involved, and I felt somehow tired about that. I am really hoping there can be more arguments that is not "because the Bible say"
I was thinking the same thing! I'm a person who is a virgin by choice because I'm very selective about who I want to have that level of intimacy with. I've dated people and after even one month (sometimes a couple weeks) of dating them, it's revealed they've been putting up a front and they're clingy or hostile or looking to me to "fix everything wrong in their lives", and it's an immediate turn off. I've also had people say "I love you" when I'd been dating them for a short time (a week) and that just ruined the relationship for me. I'm now finally in a new city and great job and everything, and the pandemic is happening, so that's put my dating on hold. I'd love to see nonreligious virgins who aren't like the psycho "he has to be tall, dark, handsome, with a 401K, and who texts perfectly,etc" sort of high maintenance ppl.
Wouldn't it be more interesting to have virgins have this discussion with virgins for religious reasons? In my opinion hearing why people are virgins for different reasons would be cool.
I felt very weird with the whole “saving a man’s life” or “making men not be violent” with sex thing. I feel like there’s an underlying issue with this that is NOT fixed with sex, but it requires therapy and these people not behaving like feral animals.
This is exactly what I thought too!!! Like how is this taking back power it feeds into the fact of objectification and digs deeper for men to be allowed to be that nasty. Like we just allow that behavior by never addressing it for what it is which is mental and psychological beliefs
It's a shame you see it like this. The examples they gave were of prior experiences. She didn't make it up and decide what she thought she did for the person.
I'm so happy to see Nathan here again. He seems like such a nice, respectful person, I remember him from the video with his fiancé. The love and appreciation he expressed towards her was so heartwarming. He is great at expressing himself and is very empathetic. Great guy!
@@xellffs6258 That's not true. There is a stigma only if you had a LOT of partners (not saying it's right). The standards once you reach your 20s and up is definitely not to still be a virgin. If you are it's weird, something is wrong with you etc.
I feel like Nathan is an incredible person, he has so much respect, talks about things without making people feel ashamed about it I mean it can seem like it’s the strict minimum but I think that I would love having a discussion with him
He doesn't have sex with his own wife for the sake of his job... And she tells him that him having sex with younger girls makes her sad yet he keeps doing it...
bro wat. u should watch this cut truth or drink with pornstars and their partners. nathan's relationship is one of the healthiest relationship there can be.
As a Christian I am exhausted from having these conversations and only caring about how it affects men. I had a porn addiction from the time I was 12, and I KNEW that I as a girl could not get help from my church bc of the judgement and stigma that would come after. We shouldn’t only worry about how the things in this world are affecting our boys and men, we ALL deserve that.
@Cece_24 yes, porn addiction exists, but only so far as you can get addicted to say food or gaming, but imo it's far more likely (generally speaking) that you've been peer pressure shamed by our sex negative culture into believing you're doing something wrong... exactly how gay people were shamed into believing homosexuality is a mental disorder or child molestation for example... if you're not physically hurting yourself or watching illegal material, then you're doing great watching porn... imo :)
@Kevin Cobb kind of, it just woke me up to realizing these are real people with jobs. The fantasies went away. There is a vice doc about Japanese porn stars. In it , one of the male Japanese porn stars was asked if he would ever like his daughter doing porn. He said something along the lines of : " yes, only if she wants too. She has to realize that porn is a job though. That we have to go back a take certain shots again and again and again...."
As somebody who is saving sex for marriage for religious reasons I think it would be far more interesting to have virgins saving themselves for other reasons as well. I'd like to hear their perspective.
Agreed. Btw, just out of curiosity, as someone who's choosing to wait for marriage for religious reason, what's your opinion about countries that make it a criminal offense to do it before marriage? Personally, I don't see anything wrong with waiting until marriage, though I think it's important for such choices to be voluntary
I was a virgin for a while. Initially saving myself for marriage but eventually I decided I wanted to save myself for a boyfriend that loved me and I loved them. I’m glad I made that choice and don’t regret it. I no longer will have sex with anyone outside of a relationship where we both professed that we love each other... but won’t necessarily wait for marriage. Side note: I found that the shame I faced for having sexual thoughts really hurt me in the long run. I still have a fear of using tampons. I don’t really know the anatomy of my vagina..never put a finger or inserted anything myself up there. I always have this fear & I know that came from saving myself.
Agreed! I'm one of those people. I've dated casually and I've never felt compelled to be intimate with any of them for various reasons. I've had their true colors come out before even considering intimacy and then ended thing shortly after, I've had clingy, controlling, lying about smoking/drug use, lied about not being an alcoholic, no job, sketchy job "car part salesman" aka drug dealer, emotionally manipulative/abusive/gaslighting, and one saw me as their substitute for going to therapy/medication/getting their life together. So basically, my attempts at dating all ended in uncovered lies and varying degrees clinginess and disrespect. I'm a virgin because the guys all played their hands way too quickly. I won't let anyone get to the deeper intimacy with me until they're genuine with me. I had a shot before the pandemic to date someone but their true colors became evident the second we couldn't be in person due to lockdown. 🤷🏻♀️. I can wait. I have solid friends and family and coworkers, so it's not like I'm bored without dating right now
@@cosmeticaffairs7220 exactly! You put it perfectly how I feel as well! I want to wait until a committed relationship where I love my partner and WANT to be intimate with them in that way.
@@HouseMDaddict I relate to both your testimonies before I became a christian. I love sex so I thought I could just casually date. But the thought of a random/unworthy person touching me like that was just so eew everytime I came close to do it.
Not too too different if you believe the stereotype that goes with being a nurse/working in hospital settings, which is that everyone is banging everyone in those workplaces lol
“Keep that pussy on lock.” Lmao. This was a heartwarming and productive episode. As someone who had premarital sex and is now happily married, to me, it’s more intimate when we cuddle and laugh than when we have sex.
Sex becomes less meaningful to you when you share it with someone you don't love. In other words, you value it less or not value it at all. Your perspective is proof. It's just like anything else. For example, food. We take food for granted because we are so used to having it until it's gone. When there is a lack of sex all of a sudden it becomes important.
I actually think it's better this way, in this context, neither side is inherently against the other, but if it was pro sex work vs anti sex work, then there is a side obviously being attacked here,, it's like if you were to have gay people vs homophobes, one of the sides is very obviously attacked and antagonize by the other side,,, I believe having a more level ground of "here's two ways of viewing and interacting with sex that can coexist" instead of a pro xyz vs anti xyz concept which pits them against each other, often with one of the sides facing overt hate,, but that's just my take on it I guess
this episode made me so happy!! the way they all asked genuine questions and were so respectful to one another 💌 it must have been a memorable moment for all of them (the hug at the end was extremely cute!)
i find some of the arguments kinda weird tbh. like that one girl saying about how when violent men have sex, it can help calm them down. i’m sorry but if you are an angry & violent person, you need therapy, not sex. sex is temporary so that will only temporarily fix your anger. and then when that other girl said how sex work saves marriages. honestly i’d rather my partner divorce me & go through that whole shitty experience rather than finding out they are cheating on me bc for whatever reason they feel like they cannot communicate their needs to me.
I personally didn't see it that way. I thought she was more so saying that sex is just another way to release pent up stress that could potentially express itself in physical aggression, etc. Not that they specifically wanted to hurt someone and that sex is an alternative to doing that. Because of you really wanted to hurt people, sex isn't going to deter you from that.
@@etherealnerd but physical aggression is a massive issue in and of itself. if you are physically aggressive, you could hurt somebody & imo that potentially requires therapy, or maybe something else that isn’t sex. why tf should you be physically aggressive when you are stressed? my mum is a very stressy person but you don’t see her punching anybody. that behaviour is not ok, is unacceptable & sex will not fix your issue of physical aggression.
@@etherealnerd why anyone would want to release their stress at the expense of having someone sexually? Maybe it is not "intimacy" which soothes the anger but a feeling of dominance over someone vulnerable before you?
@@prod.bexerk8997 I’m a Christian we aren’t crazy lol we just have different beliefs the ones who are rude and horrible are the ones going against what our religion says I love and respect everyone no matter there sexuality, religion, or anything like that even if I don’t agree with it
@@lapris7380 😅😅😭I just red my comments again it's sounds way different then I thought in my head, what meant to say is that I expected the sex workers to be super aggressive towards the virgins when they said the were Christians
Everyone in this episode was so sweet and supportive of eachother. AND actually willing to hear out the others sides opinions and perspectives and further questioning them. I want to be friends with everyone in this video!
Same for the religious virgins though, they didn't represent the ones who insult, scoff and demonise sex work. There are extreme case scenarios in both sides. The religious virgins were the nicest bunch they could have found but we both know that a lot of them wouldn't have been this sweet to the sex workers.
I can understand both sides except the part about sex with a sex worker saving marriage. If you’re married, you’re basically cheating and that’s so unfair to the partner. Not trying to generalize sex workers. Just saying, we shouldn’t normalize adultery.
I don't agree with you. There are health conditions where human touch is painful and in those situations the other partner still has sexual desires then sex workers can save the marriage if it is talked about between the couple in these situations. It allows the other partner to still get that sexual desire they may have
I know, that moment shook me. They do it because they’re opportunists that know they can get away with it. Imagine the sex worker claiming that the police officer who caught her and took her in raped her. People will likely think she’s just trying to stir trouble and she won’t be believed.
That's not even taking into consideration how often cops will just turn away sex workers who have been raped. Saying stuff like "you asked for it." "that's part of the job" or other victim blaming crap.
Bruh with her being a sex worker, I would imagine she knows a LOT of other sex workers. Like, not trying to invalidate what she said, but maybe a bit because I highly doubt it's true
@@ItachiUchiha-sh6of It shouldn't be "part of the job", of course. Still, I think that the risk is part of the job. Kinda like if you were an insane stunt person, and then broke a leg. When you're then complaining to the hospital worker, I imagine they would still feel bad, but also be like "damn bruh kinda a risk of the job eh?". Not quite the same thing but I mean it is simply an insanely higher risk in that job and unfortunately that's just how it is. Also not saying the cop shouldn't help the sex worker, but like prob wouldn't feel the same way as if a different person had a similar experience.
@Nixulluve Assuming "almost every" is about 90%, you're saying about 90% of sex workers have gotten raped by cops? Not saying that's impossible, but I am because that's like, pretty impossible
As a virgin ace, I feel like there's a whole other side to this conversation that's getting missed since the only virgins in the conversation are religious. Nothing against the religious stand point, it's valid, duh, but not everyone is a virgin for religious reasons. To me, sex work is so alien of a concept for someone who experiences life like me that it's kind of fascinating. Like how someone might be fascinated by a great magician. I have no idea what's going on but I'm here for you doing you boo and I have a million and a half questions.
Yeah that's where I'm at in this conversation as well! Like sex work is such a wild but interesting field of work to me. It's so crazy to me that people really get naked and touch privates but also it's super valid and I wouldn't discourage it.
i think this conversation was about whether or not sex workers and religious people who were anti sex could see eye to eye. As for someone who is asexual this kind of conversation would be one of endearment, not disagreement. the point of the yt channel is for people who have polarizing beliefs to come together and talk about their own experiences. typically people who are of religious or spiritual faith have very conservative ideas when it comes to sex. I to was hoping to see an atheist talk about the sort of topic.
Thank you! Literally came to the coments searching for this. And I totally agree. I would have loved it if they had included a virgin ace and where that would have led the discussion
So glad the issue with trafficking was brought up. I wish they had spent more time talking about that because it really is a huge problem that needs more attention. Unfortunately the sex industry plays a part in that and will continue to unless people do something about it. Sex work should only EVER be by choice
This is a difficult topic and is not one that i feel sex workers have to tackle alone. Let's say I'm a farmer raising cruelty free chickens. Am i also responsible for the millions of farmers who are raising chickens in the most inhumane way? I don't think I have the power, nor the sway, nor the obligation to shut down or change those other farms. I can only be responsible for my chickens and my farm, not the world's.
@@MistaZULE yeah, I never said they did have to tackle it alone. But the industry is blended like that, so they do carry a bit of responsibility being a part of that industry because the industry itself makes things like trafficking easier. As a chicken farmer it says a lot about your ethics if you don't just care about your own backyard, but you work towards ethics in the community altogether. But also, unethical chicken farming is not even comparable to sex trafficking.
@@Charlie-tq9yb that's not how it works. Trafficking is forcing people to *work* Many people choose it, and many don't Sex work is not, by definition, by choice.
nathan's demeanor and respect, curiosity and open attitude was so attractive in a person. I feel like his corn is probably so much better than the average main strean video because of this background info on who he is!
i think angie's responses were actually really beautiful when she spoke about her knowing she was a sexual being but only wanting to share that with her husband...
About the "we (escorts) save marriages" part. I think it only saves a marriage if both can agree, that they aren't happy with their sex lives anymore but don't want to break up because of it. If they talk about going to an escort service and are okay with their partner having sex with someone else then why not. But if it's happening without telling your partner and they find out about it through another way, it can be really hurtful and trust breaking and then this is the reason why they even got divorced.
I agree completely, open and transparent communication is always best in any relationship. However, I imagine in some of those cases, if one partner came to the other with ‘it’s okay that you don’t want to have sex with me, I still love you and want to be with you, but I also want to get my needs met’ would still end that relationship because monogamy is seen as the default and the risk that through that intimacy, that partner might fall in love with someone else and leave them.
@@aaronweiss3294 not necessarily. there are polygamous people who are in marriages too. I think it's great that people are becoming open about their polygamy, instead of cheating on their partners. and I do agree with the comment you replied to, that escorts only save a marriage if both partners know what's happening and are okay with it.
THhis was the calmest, most respectful conversation I've seen about this. How the virgins and sex workers more respectful than the Christians and the non-christians?!
this was arguably the best jubilee content I've ever come across. And trust me, I'm an avid middle ground fan so i mean it when i say this, from the depths of my heart. I've seen everything. everyone on both sides was so well spoken, educated, and well-intentioned. i love the way everyone was laughing at each other, lightheartedly. laughter is the best medicine and the best common ground; this video was filled with respect and love for people that have extremely opposing sides. we need more of this.
jubilee if you're reading this right now and you ever want to produce any more content on mental health. please include me. I'm just an ordinary person, but it would be my greatest blessing and i would carry so much pride to be a part of something so amazing and revolutionary. your work is amazing and I have the utmost respect for what you guys stand for and promote. opposing sides having a positive and productive conversation, and people coming together on middle ground is what we desperately need in this country. thank you for all that you do.
I agree to a point, I think Jubilee could of delved deeper in more about the sex trafficking and connections to the industry, instead it was mostly statements about religious views (which will always have a bias).
I agree. I actually love it when they all share laughs cuz it makes them feel like they on the same page. It demonstrates a great deal of respect, maturity, understanding, and communication skills
The only reason why I’m still a virgin is not religious or marital at all. I just haven’t found someone who I feel is worthy enough for me to give it up. I crave giving it to someone I love and who loves me, that would be an experience worth waiting for xx
She said sex work could save marriages, but she also mentioned it as being a band aid on an issue in their relationship. I don't see a band aid "saving" a marriage. It seems like a quick easy short-term solution to a long-term issue. I understand her view, but counseling and therapy is one of the better avenues for such issues.
I'm a 21yr old virgin and I don't see virginity till marriage as something amazing nor do I put it on a pedestal. But I do know science have proven that sex with people who u r attached to emotionally is much better than random sex. Th marriage part is mostly a religious thing rather than a morality thing. Being a virgin isn't a measure of how pure a person is but neither is it a bad thing. Having sex before marriage isn't a bad thing either. I hate virgin shaming and sl*t shaming people.
Hi Sunny! I can definitely say sex is not something to be put on a pedestal because even though it is one of the most beautiful forms of intimacy, it is not the only one. I waited until I found my life partner and it was not intentional and that emotional connection makes it amazing because you don’t seek others at all. Stay virgin if that’s what you want because it is a beautiful thing to experience with someone who you truly love and loves you.
@@Ellieprez I agree with u. I'm just going with the flow tbh I'm not depressed cuz I'm not having sex nor am I gonna abstain from it intentionally. Emotions do matter alot. Some marriages last while some don't. Idk how my life is gonna be but if I want to have sex it's gonna be with someone who I love and who loves me alot.
I think it's much safer to have sex with someone you're emotionally connected to (not necessarily married, but at least in a more serious relationship where the two of you already know each other well enough), because it can be very dangerous to have that type of intimacy with someone you just met at a nightclub or something. You must first know if the person is violent, unreliable, jealous, controlling or has any other character flaws before going to bed with them.
5:09 I disagree here. You aren't "saving a marriage" by being the sex worker the husband hires to get his rocks off. That doesn't fix their lack of connection, trust, and lust with their partner. I argue that men in those situations need to learn to leave those situations instead of just satisfying their pleasures elsewhere. Also I doubt any of those wives would love that their husband was seeking sex elsewhere instead of communicating their needs or actually leaving the relationship first before cheating.
And she agreed that she wouldnt like to be married to a dude who hires someone else for sex... Then why do to others something you know its not right in terms of morals?
@@MrCheesecake1928 because its a morally grey issue rather than a black and white one. Who knows maybe the husband loves everything about his wife and doesnt want to leave her but also really enjoys sex that his wife cant provide to him. Or maybe the marriage is failing and he should leave the wife for someone else. Noone knows what kind of value sex holds to those men, especially not her. She doesnt have the knowledge to judge whether its the right choice or not.Thats something the husbands should realise themselves since theyre the ones who know their own situations the best.
@@tibi9733 exactly..studies show that not all men that cheats/have sex with another woman while married means that they don't unconditionally love thier spouse.. on the other hand if a woman cheats there's a way higher chance that she doesn't love her spouse and is just using him.. .... It is still wrong for men to cheat. Tho
Hey it’s Jake. The reason why I am strict with my sexual views is for my personal growth. I don’t look down on anyone that does it differently. Much Love ❤️
I appreciate that you are open about it because there are many guys out there who are ashamed and feel as if they are disadvantaged because of the stereotypes surrounding virginity.
Totally agreed with Nathan. Better sex education better parenting. I’d rather my 3 kids have a super uncomfortable conversation with them instead of them learning from porn or their friends
I agreed with her on everything except that. If I found out my husband did that marriage over. In fact of it came down to that I would rather the marriage be over instead
Not all marriages have sex at the center of the relationship, and put more value on emotional intimacy, companionship. One spouse may be unable to have sex, so the other will go outside the marriage to meet that need. This even happens sometimes with the other spouse's consent.
@@thegreatwesternbengalproje2863 gross if my husband killed my mom and I didn’t know that does that mean it helps my marriage? Not knowing doesn’t mean it’s okay
1 - Nathan is a very a open-minded person and he knows what he says and what he stands for 2 - there's nothing Wrong with being a sex worker as long as you're protecting your body, and at the end of the day everybody is free to do what they want,
@@dave1T I wouldn't mind. would you ? wow, its 2022 I thought we were beyond this by now, especially the western countries. why would you mind ? besides, nobody is forcing you to go "associate with them in public" if you don't want to.
@@dave1T your question makes no moral sense, I don't judge people based on their jobs I only care about how they think, and these sex workers are seem very open-minded I'd definitely love to hang out with them
Anytime y'all do things with virgins, they're always hella religious. The conversation always boils down to what Christians think about sex. Where are the asexuals or the virgins that wish they weren't a virgin or the virgins that's are struggling to find someone to have sex with? Not every virgin is a virgin by choice. Not all virgins are Christians.
This thank you. There are so many people who just haven’t found someone they love enough to give their virginity too. That’s most virgins.The religious people are the extreme side.
I am blown away by how respectful everyone here was. I think this is the first Jubilee episode where I didn’t hear one sideways comment or any form of disrespect. It was so genuinely uplifting and they were all so well spoken. Thank you to everyone in the video!
As someone who’s been sexually assaulted and has a very mixed relationship with my body and sexuality...this has been such a heartwarming conversation to watch tbh. Thank you guys for hosting this because sex in general can be a very touchy subject. The sex workers and the people who are virgins were so open and understanding...overall I’m happy and a little emotional in the best way possible
@@h3llboyyy407 not really ,some are demi sexuals , asexuals or simply stucked in a super religious society and cant experience the sexual experience freely without being shamed or even puting their lives in danger
As someone who was a virgin and waited to have sex with someone and then quite literally fucked up and ended up having sex - I justified it by saying well we are getting married anyway. That sexual guilt pushed me to a really unhealthy relationship and 100% would’ve ended up in divorce. I really caution people to not make an idol of sex because we are animals who have desire and this can cloud or judgement and sometimes fall in love with the wrong people.
If anything this video shows how we as people can have civilized conversations about sex. Having conversations like this should be normalized, and I’m not talking about having sex or not having sex being normalized, but more of being able to talk about it honestly and being able to express opinions.
I have a feeling that these sex workers are the "privileged" sex workers. Not the kind that live in 3rd world countries and are forced to perform sex work to survive and don't have the tools to protect themselves. I wish they talked about the way the sex/porn industry regularly exploits women, not to mention when it involves children. Not just women from third world countries, but the women in America who are exploited and trafficked.
I understand wanting to hear that conversation but seems like not the place for a sex workers v virgins discussion. Maybe sex workers that are “privileged” and people who have been forced into it can have a conversation about it.
Me and my partner have been together for 3 years and haven’t had sex for the past year. We ultimately lost sexual attraction to one another but love each other more than anything. Sex is not something every couple needs in order to be in a happy and healthy relationship. Don’t feel pressured to think sex is the most important part of a relationship- for me at least, it’s about the emotional connection and love you share for eachother
@@Sarah-po7ik I mean the fact yous said you lost sexual attraction for each other and haven’t had sex in the past year does give the impression your partner is getting it from else where you don’t just lose sexual attraction for someone you love
I’d love to see too a hypersexual/ someone who really enjoys sex VS asexuals, and the different perspectives of the intimacy and the connection VS the non-need to, and distaste toward it I also think a [people attracted to women] VS [people attracted to men] would be pretty interesting too, and then maybe bring in the bisexuals/ people into enbies as the translator type haha
My husband and I were virgins until marriage. I was nearly 27 and he was 36. We both had dated people beforehand. I really wish I hadn’t even held hands with or kissed other people before my husband. I cannot imagine how it feels when you’ve slept with others. I am thankful, after eighteen years of marriage, that we have no one to compare the other with.
i'm sorry-and without any disrespect to the woman who said this-in what world is having an affair with a sex worker going to save someone's marriage? adultery is a leading cause of divorce! if during a lull or difficult time my husband decided to be intimate with another person behind my back, THAT would end the marriage. i can't even begin to understand her logic or line of thinking
Not to mention that cheating causes way more damage to the other person than just ending a failed relationship, and I think most people who have been cheated on would agree, including myself. Her point made absolutely no sense.
One this is almost correct cheating is not the leading cause of divorce getting caught is. Two you seem to lack the ability to see circumstances other than your own where this would be a viable option especially if the spouse was informed beforehand. I’m not saying cheating is ok but in some cases it’s not the worst option.
Why do you assume sex workers who left the profession will be against it? I’m sure it’s a demanding but lucrative job which some might not want to do forever - doesn’t mean they hate it. If someone quit a travelling circus for a more normal life you wouldn’t assume they hated working in the circus - so why do you assume former sex workers hated their proffesion? I know several ex strippers who don’t hate it at all but they’ve moved on with life.
So, sex CAN be the ultimate form of intimacy, in fact in many relatioships it is. But it doesn't have to be in every relationship. In fact even in the relationships where it is other factors contribute to building that intimacy. Basically intimate sex is what you can achieve but the sex is not responsible for building the intimacy, it is merely the fruit of it.
This is just my opinion, but even though I agree that sex is a great form of intimacy, intimacy itself can be interpreted and shown in many different ways. It's not always about just doing it full force or taking your time, enjoying the foreplay or "build up", if you will. I've never had sex, but I know this is something I want when both my partner and I decide on it mutually.
Aella is absolutely gorgeous and she seems so kind and down-to-earth. Everyone here seemed to know exactly what they were talking about. Avery is interesting too. Sex workers seem to have an entirely different life philosophy. I can definitely understand the complication of sexuality and Judeo-Christian religions.
i’m just curious, not trying to be accusatory but is there a reason you said judeo-christian instead of just abrahamic? like was islam excluded for a specific reason?
@@efemenaipoko2205 I wish I could be more open with my sexuality but I don't think I could do it. I know variety is the spice of life, I just don't think I want to sleep with too many people.
@@somebrid2147 depends, some might say being asexual is perversion of the natural order by not feeling attraction/desiring sex with others whilst others would praise it as a pinnacle of godly purity
@@somebrid2147 Its pretty much abstinence. In one of the books written by Paul I believe he mentions some are called to lead a life of abstinence but its usually not because they lack desire.
@@levinorton8676 are you saying that asexuality is the same as abstinence or that christians see it as abstinence? because if you meant the former, that isn't the case at all. a lot of asexuals have sex, they just don't have sexual desire or they don't have as much sexual desire as an average allosexual.
Is it possible to do a video on people who waited till marriage and ended up getting divorced & ask if they regret waiting till marriage, what they learned, if they still have the same views on waiting till marriage, if they would recommend it (after what they’ve experienced), etc.
Yes! I wish I could remember the article I read awhile back but this woman waited til marriage & got divorced like 5 years later. Basically she said she had to learn what she liked & didn’t because she always went towards what her husband like
As someone who's ace, I'm honestly so surprised that a few of them actually referenced asexuality, like, even the "sex is something almost everyone engages with" or however they said it, but they didn't say it was everyone, and I just really appreciate that they actually acknowledged that asexuality is a real legit thing in this
I understand that peoples wives or partners owe you no loyalty but to sit there and say that you're in support of people cheating on their partners in order to "save" their marriage Is wrong on so many levels.
I don't think anyone on this panel is for slavery, which is what sex trafficking is. Let's not conflate voluntary sex work with forced or coerced sex work.
@@e.pluribusunum7916 mmmmm... We can have different perspectives, and that's okay! You can get trafficked in many ways. I work with a lot of victims who were voluntary at first and then it all got out of control. I don't believe there is a lot of instances where sexwork is voluntary (i was in the field for 10 years), and I think it's kind of gross to glamourize the industry as an empowering choice for women who have the money and safety to do it that way, all while women and children are still suffering, sacrificing their bodies for survival.
I mean, one side is consenting and one side isn't. It's like saying you want one side to be people who have had sex and one side to be people who were r@ped.
@@E.primordial94 That's like saying we should stop having sex, because there are people who r@pe. Have you ever considered the fact that trafficking wouldn't be such a thing, if prostitution were legalised? There would be so many regulations involved, that they wouldn't be able to hide away as easily. Sometimes, making things illegal doesn't make it dissappear; it just makes it worse.
So impressed with Aella. Rudy and Avery too. It's often the groups you "least expect" who are the most well-spoken, collected and calm on this channel. You learn so much about life in the trenches, more than most do in sheltered places. That said, Angie and the others were also thoughtful and fair!
This is by far one the best middle ground episodes you've done. People went in willing to listen, to educate, and to change their minds. Not just argue their positions and clap back at the other side.
When she said “we save marriages” that’s when I drew the line, that’s what breaks marriages not fixes them, if u r not being pleased by ur partner talk to them! If nth works divorce ! Adultery/cheating isn’t Noble tf?
@@theguywhoisaustralian1465 Correlation does not equal causation. Maybe legalised prostitution means degenerate men are comfortable with sex workers and don't get into relationships that lead to marriage. It doesn't indicate "prostitution is the antidote for a failing marriage!"
@@sjb_92 Hey, she said like Right After That Point, that it's NOT an antidote for marriage, like not at ideal at all. I don't think she expressed that point in the best way either, but I get what she meant. It preserves it on paper for a time, but is not ideal in a monogamous committed relationship.
I love how straightforward and considerate they where saying their side of the story and the way they tried to actually understand the other point pf view
I wasn’t expecting this, but this genuinely went so much better than I thought it would. Everyone was so friendly and respectful to eachother. It was really nice to see.
I love how respectful everyone is towards eachother :) it's nice to see people have a conversation rather than yelling at eachother, like a lot of these videos tend to be like
It absolutely can save marriages. If someone in a marriage could no longer perform sex, whether it be through a disability, illness or by choice, and the partner still needed to have sex. Through communication and consent, the partner can seek out a professional sex worker to have their needs met, while still being in their marriage.
Is no one going to talk about the horrendously bad take that sex work “saves lives” by giving violent men intimacy ???? Consent should never be a commodity, but least of all commodified for violent misogynists - surely this is not a controversial opinion????
I'll play "devil's advocate" so to speak. An argument could be made that visiting a sex worker could be a healthy Avenue for stress relief. Much like playing violent videogames or sports. Its also been said that the advent of the internet also helped reduce violent crime. So I think thats more what they were referring to.
@@ItachiUchiha-sh6of I know that’s what they meant I just think that is a terrible take lol. I think it is very wrong to compare sex - which should involve ONLY consenting adults - to hobbies like you mentioned, which don’t involve intimate physical relationships. Also I’m interested to know where you’ve seen the internet reduce violent crime?
If people have a problem with not having the amount of intimacy they want in a relationship then leave. Why cheat? Why be selfish because seeking attention from a sex worker is only damaging if not agreed upon by both parties. P*rn is also so damaging to relationships. People want what they can’t have… well go get what you truly want then and move on from your partner. Especially if that is not discussed in the relationship and kept a secret. P*rn (majority) is also not educational at all. It’s unrealistic and if that is also the only source of “education” then true intimacy and satisfaction will never be reached.
All men watch porn for the simple reason that it’s a quick way to get off when no ones around. Obviously your partner isn’t going to be avaliable or up for a quickie every time you feel like it - hence porn. You think if men didn’t have porn they wouldn’t still be masturbating to what they didn’t have and just thinking of their gf or wife lol? Of course not and neither do women.
It really comes down to IF it's cheating or not. If you talk to your spouse about it and you both agree it's a healthy outlet that's not an issue, it's only an issue if your sneaking around to see escorts.
I believe that very often, a marriage isn’t always about hyper-romantic love or sexual passion. And fairly often, a marriage turns into a partnership and an obligation. When finances are intertwined and there are children, divorce doesn’t feel like an option. If the sexual relationship in a marriage is over but one parter still feels like he needs that release or connection, he should be able to have it. If he is in that scenario, he should tell is wife.
Couldn't click fast enough. Nathan is just the cutest, he's just so happy to be there. And I kinda wish yall didn't cut Avery when she said "every sex work she knows who has had an encounter with the cops has been raped by the cops. People need to 1. Heard that and 2. Think about that. I feel you rushed that point
Came across this channel recently and I just love this concept. The open end conversations about literally any topic, sharing ideas, thoughts, beliefs, without judgement, and even being open to look the other side of things which you wouldn't have otherwise is just amazing. We need more openness and inclusively like this in our generation.
I came in expecting to judge both sides in one way or another and feel like I’ve actually learned quite a lot. I honestly think this might be the best middle ground episode they’ve done so far I am very surprised.
The biggest problem with sex is often lack of communication. Successful sex workers have to become very skilled in clear, direct communication regarding their body/sex and I think that is something all of us not in that career path should really learn and embrace. I can’t even begin to imagine how many relationships (one night stands, marriages, friends with benefits, etc) would be improved by that level of openness.
@@imanigordon6803 okay? And? She explained a little more what she meant by it, also what does that have to do with my question and this person's comment???????
i genuinely felt like both sides were super respectful towards each other-this is one of the better middle ground episodes definitely !!
except angie
Very different than when lotus lain was on the sex workers vs religious leaders episode.
Well a virgin literally can’t argue someone who isn’t to be one
@@Imstillgeorge yes but they could disrespect them and shame them for their decisions, but they didn’t
@@kara5281 I hope the rest of your year is great
i think it would be really interesting to have an episode of sex workers versus ex sex workers. i believe that would provide a lot more perspective on how sex work affects people who get involved in it.
That would be interesting.
Yes very interesting!
Also different kinds of sex workers. I'm happy they choose their work that way, it should be like the. But is not the case for all sex workers. But of course, is difficult to find forced sex workers for this kind of dynamic, the pimp wouldn't allow it
Yes.
I agree!
I wish there was a virgin on this episode that was a virgin due to choice not necessarily religion. That would've given another interesting perspective
Yes, I'm atheist virgin I'm over forty, ex lingerie model just to give some background. I chose a non piv sx lifestyle as a woman, but I've been with thousands of men. I'm also an ex sx worker.
I understand your point but following religious beliefs is a choice. Religion doesn’t force your to do anything. That’s what cults do.
That is a choice
Yes, but they chose religious virgins bc they have the opposite stance of sex workers. An atheist virgin for example wouldn't have any problem with sex work, making for a boring discussion. They try to have ppl from opposite ends of the spectrum to see if they can discuss and find any middle ground.
@@bodyofhope why not? An atheist can most certainly be against sx work. A stance regarding sx work has nothing to do with any religion!
This is one of the most mutually respected videos I've watched on middle ground. Neither side was harshly judging anyone and they were laughing and learning together.
This was the calmest, most respectful conversation iv seen on this channel. Who knew.
Both positions have been firm for centuries. Flat earth, tranz, hyper raciality are all brand new social constructs.
I think it's because they don't belong in "opposite groups" like other video where it's "that VS anti-that". Here, it's just people with different way of living their lives, they don't think necessarily that the other group is in the wrong, they just don't want to live like them
@@mauhine26 true, very true.
Because they don't contradict eachother... While vegans and meat eaters, it speaks for itself.
Also I think both groups might face a lot of criticism in their private lives, so I feel like they are more understanding to people facing similar experiences in that area
I found the idea of “not everyone should watch porn” interesting as it made me think of my friends who just shouldn’t watch horror movies as it really affects them negatively (like literally makes them anxious and paranoid etc..)
I love that they talked about that. How porn is just entertainment not reality and how it has a negative effect on people. I always felt like a prude or left out to admit that I dont like watching it
This goes to the heart of so many things. Porn is a tool. It can be used well. It can be abused. Simply because some people abuse it, doesn’t mean no one should have access to it or the tool is inherently bad. In the same way as there’s bad and unethical porn, some tolls are badly made some are not. But it doesn’t mean the tool is inherently bad and should be banned.
@@MikeCruzable this!!!
@@MikeCruzable This is false. Pornography is inherently destructive. It’s not just entertainment. Some things belong in the privacy of a bedroom away from the eyes of the world. This is one of them.
@@katethegreat4918 it might be false for YOU but it is not objectively false. Many couple - married and not married - have benefited from using porn as a tool. Many people with various medical conditions or people in a variety of situations have benefited from it. It’s also helpful for the occasional entertainment for some people. What’s unhealthy is obsessive use, addiction, or extreme or unethical porn exposure to people who are undereducated or too young, or porn paired with bad sex education/bad parenting. But again, like any tool, this is true. This is also true of most medical drugs, this is also true of marihuana, alcohol, and cigarettes. This is also true of exercise, or eating, or shopping. This is even true of religion as we all know what cults and fundamentalism can create. Excess and abuse is one thing, the tool is something else.
I feel like they could have gotten people that are virgins for different reasons other than religion for the sake of more opinions
like iamLucid
Agreed. This Made their side of the argument Stale . I always Pause these Videos in between different prompts and Try to check and form an opinion & in This Episode The Virgin side didn't gave me any fruitful inputs.
Tbh, almost 90% of people that are virgins are that because of religion. Others are probably virgins because they can't get laid ( incels) it'll be really difficult to find a person that isn't a virgin because of religion.
@@nonsomokwuah That's Actually true
I agree. For a lot of people, they're virgins because it just hasn't happened yet. For me, I don't want to engage in sex until I find someone that I have a strong emotional bond with. That doesn't mean they're gonna be my forever person, but I have to be emotionally attracted to them. And that hasn't happened yet for me
" i feel like we’re saving lives", saying that when there’s a nurse in the room is insanity at its peak.
You Must Not Know 🤣
The most insane thing was that sex worker who said she saves family and marriages like 😮
her point kinda made sense in a way. a lot of violet men probably do turn to sex workers instead of hurting their wives or families
there are more ways to save lives than medically.
😂😂😂
I kinda wish the "virgin" side was not only for religious reasons but were for identities like asexuality and being able to see what different perspectives on intimacy could be.
I mean it's not that difficult to remain a virgin for an asexual
@@noemisadventures206 I think they just worded it badly. They probably mean being a virgin by choice because of asexuality. Generally speaking you can be asexual and have sex anyways, but then again why would you want to?
they could've picked me. LMAO
Sex just scares me for some unknown reasons
@@noemisadventures206 were you replying to me?
I mean it could be interesting to see perspectives. I'm not saying it based off of "choice" of being a virgin or difficulty level of anything but it could level a view of how folks view sex.
It would have been interesting to have this discussion with sex workers and people who are virgins for a non religious reason. I guess it's a different discussion but it would be really interesting
I totally agree
agreed, nearly every episode of Middle Ground has some religious involved, and I felt somehow tired about that. I am really hoping there can be more arguments that is not "because the Bible say"
Agreed! But Jubilee is low-key a Christian-focused channel and they love to bring videos back to the religion
I was thinking the same thing! I'm a person who is a virgin by choice because I'm very selective about who I want to have that level of intimacy with. I've dated people and after even one month (sometimes a couple weeks) of dating them, it's revealed they've been putting up a front and they're clingy or hostile or looking to me to "fix everything wrong in their lives", and it's an immediate turn off. I've also had people say "I love you" when I'd been dating them for a short time (a week) and that just ruined the relationship for me. I'm now finally in a new city and great job and everything, and the pandemic is happening, so that's put my dating on hold. I'd love to see nonreligious virgins who aren't like the psycho "he has to be tall, dark, handsome, with a 401K, and who texts perfectly,etc" sort of high maintenance ppl.
Wouldn't it be more interesting to have virgins have this discussion with virgins for religious reasons? In my opinion hearing why people are virgins for different reasons would be cool.
I felt very weird with the whole “saving a man’s life” or “making men not be violent” with sex thing. I feel like there’s an underlying issue with this that is NOT fixed with sex, but it requires therapy and these people not behaving like feral animals.
Self-control is a virtue
This is exactly what I thought too!!! Like how is this taking back power it feeds into the fact of objectification and digs deeper for men to be allowed to be that nasty. Like we just allow that behavior by never addressing it for what it is which is mental and psychological beliefs
@@Friendly_Neigborhood_Astolfo am telling you!!..
It's a shame you see it like this. The examples they gave were of prior experiences. She didn't make it up and decide what she thought she did for the person.
@@artistetcascadeur I know it’s her experience, but I’ve heard these examples prior to this. It’s not an a isolated experience.
I'm so happy to see Nathan here again. He seems like such a nice, respectful person, I remember him from the video with his fiancé. The love and appreciation he expressed towards her was so heartwarming. He is great at expressing himself and is very empathetic. Great guy!
Can you tell me the title of that video? :)
What is his last name?
We been seen him 😂😂😂
@@emreayvazoglu7071 Nathan Bronson is his name.
Selling your body is respectful?
It was so nice to hear everyone's oppinion in this group. Nathan was so respectful to everyone and uplifting.
I am highly supportive of open relationships, but I also support abstinence. I think both are nice.
I was searching for a Nathan comment! He’s just so effortlessly likable
Oh the moment he spoke I knew I was going to like him.
I would like to hear Nate talk about stunt work now. It's like ok I know his side hustle, so pls don't throw a hip out, I wanna see him jump on a car!
Exactly.
I hate how society has made being a virgin something to be ashamed of. Not everyone is sexual.
I agree. It makes me feel like im unwanted, or disgusting, unlovable.
I hate how society made being a not a virgin a shameful thing.
I feel like it's the opposite, a big chunk of society glorifies being a virgin as some sort holy grail of religious purity
From this video it looks like the virgins are doing the shaming 😒
@@xellffs6258 That's not true. There is a stigma only if you had a LOT of partners (not saying it's right). The standards once you reach your 20s and up is definitely not to still be a virgin. If you are it's weird, something is wrong with you etc.
I feel like Nathan is an incredible person, he has so much respect, talks about things without making people feel ashamed about it I mean it can seem like it’s the strict minimum but I think that I would love having a discussion with him
Nathan's awesome! He'd be such a fun friend
would be a cool dad
do anybody know what his last name is i’m tryna see something
yeah he saves his load for pornstars and leaves his wife dry and she hates what he does, what a great guy
He doesn't have sex with his own wife for the sake of his job... And she tells him that him having sex with younger girls makes her sad yet he keeps doing it...
That guy saying he has to save his sex drive for work and he can't give that to his future wife is the most depressing thing I've ever heard
Same
That’s insane
bro wat. u should watch this cut truth or drink with pornstars and their partners. nathan's relationship is one of the healthiest relationship there can be.
his brain is rotted
Literally...
As a Christian I am exhausted from having these conversations and only caring about how it affects men. I had a porn addiction from the time I was 12, and I KNEW that I as a girl could not get help from my church bc of the judgement and stigma that would come after. We shouldn’t only worry about how the things in this world are affecting our boys and men, we ALL deserve that.
How did you get over it?? 😪😪
Yes! I feel exactly the same!
@@theofficial-j-2859 I honestly looked at sex workers documentaries and begin to realize that porn stars are just people again..
@Cece_24 yes, porn addiction exists, but only so far as you can get addicted to say food or gaming, but imo it's far more likely (generally speaking) that you've been peer pressure shamed by our sex negative culture into believing you're doing something wrong... exactly how gay people were shamed into believing homosexuality is a mental disorder or child molestation for example... if you're not physically hurting yourself or watching illegal material, then you're doing great watching porn... imo :)
@Kevin Cobb kind of, it just woke me up to realizing these are real people with jobs. The fantasies went away. There is a vice doc about Japanese porn stars.
In it , one of the male Japanese porn stars was asked if he would ever like his daughter doing porn. He said something along the lines of :
" yes, only if she wants too. She has to realize that porn is a job though. That we have to go back a take certain shots again and again and again...."
Can we see people who are into hookup culture and casual sex vs those who are not. Would be awesome to see.
Less extreme, but that would be interesting.
It would be
I would love love love an episode like this too.
I don't see the difference.
There is actually an episode that is about monogamy and polygamy and is similar to what you’re saying
As somebody who is saving sex for marriage for religious reasons I think it would be far more interesting to have virgins saving themselves for other reasons as well. I'd like to hear their perspective.
Agreed. Btw, just out of curiosity, as someone who's choosing to wait for marriage for religious reason, what's your opinion about countries that make it a criminal offense to do it before marriage? Personally, I don't see anything wrong with waiting until marriage, though I think it's important for such choices to be voluntary
I was a virgin for a while. Initially saving myself for marriage but eventually I decided I wanted to save myself for a boyfriend that loved me and I loved them. I’m glad I made that choice and don’t regret it. I no longer will have sex with anyone outside of a relationship where we both professed that we love each other... but won’t necessarily wait for marriage.
Side note: I found that the shame I faced for having sexual thoughts really hurt me in the long run. I still have a fear of using tampons. I don’t really know the anatomy of my vagina..never put a finger or inserted anything myself up there. I always have this fear & I know that came from saving myself.
Agreed! I'm one of those people. I've dated casually and I've never felt compelled to be intimate with any of them for various reasons. I've had their true colors come out before even considering intimacy and then ended thing shortly after, I've had clingy, controlling, lying about smoking/drug use, lied about not being an alcoholic, no job, sketchy job "car part salesman" aka drug dealer, emotionally manipulative/abusive/gaslighting, and one saw me as their substitute for going to therapy/medication/getting their life together. So basically, my attempts at dating all ended in uncovered lies and varying degrees clinginess and disrespect. I'm a virgin because the guys all played their hands way too quickly. I won't let anyone get to the deeper intimacy with me until they're genuine with me. I had a shot before the pandemic to date someone but their true colors became evident the second we couldn't be in person due to lockdown. 🤷🏻♀️. I can wait. I have solid friends and family and coworkers, so it's not like I'm bored without dating right now
@@cosmeticaffairs7220 exactly! You put it perfectly how I feel as well! I want to wait until a committed relationship where I love my partner and WANT to be intimate with them in that way.
@@HouseMDaddict I relate to both your testimonies before I became a christian. I love sex so I thought I could just casually date. But the thought of a random/unworthy person touching me like that was just so eew everytime I came close to do it.
Comparing being a nurse to a sex worker is crazzzzzzy😂
Came through at the end
Work is work, 5$ spends the same no matter how you make it. 🤷♂️
Not too too different if you believe the stereotype that goes with being a nurse/working in hospital settings, which is that everyone is banging everyone in those workplaces lol
Exactly what I was thinking💀
a respectable and higher education profession vs sex worker lmaoo
“Keep that pussy on lock.” Lmao. This was a heartwarming and productive episode. As someone who had premarital sex and is now happily married, to me, it’s more intimate when we cuddle and laugh than when we have sex.
Wholesome
Definitely a womem
Only a woman would say this.
@@anthropomorphicOrangetbh no
Sex becomes less meaningful to you when you share it with someone you don't love. In other words, you value it less or not value it at all. Your perspective is proof. It's just like anything else. For example, food. We take food for granted because we are so used to having it until it's gone. When there is a lack of sex all of a sudden it becomes important.
It should not be pro sex workers vs. virgins, it should be pro-sex work vs. anti sex work.
I agree, it was weird to see the title at first.
Anti sex work people HATE speaking to sex workers
I actually think it's better this way, in this context, neither side is inherently against the other, but if it was pro sex work vs anti sex work, then there is a side obviously being attacked here,, it's like if you were to have gay people vs homophobes, one of the sides is very obviously attacked and antagonize by the other side,,, I believe having a more level ground of "here's two ways of viewing and interacting with sex that can coexist" instead of a pro xyz vs anti xyz concept which pits them against each other, often with one of the sides facing overt hate,, but that's just my take on it I guess
it wasn't pro sex workers though? it was just sex workers? like people who have a lot of sex, contrary to people who haven't had any?
Those Anti-Sex Worker People are locked up Prison serving life or on Death Row, Facts!
Idk if Nathan goes to church at all but he gave us a WORD at the end! He said “intimacy is moments! Sex is not the thing you die for!” Wow, PREACH!!!
damn really, his response was amazing
I want him to do a lecture like that in sex ed classes. People need to hear that!
His father is a pastor. That will always be a part of him, even if it's suppressed.
But it's untrue though... Intimacy is not made up of moments. It's a long term, build up of familiarity and closeness with another individual.
I mean, he did say his dad was a pastor, so I guess he picked up some speaking skills from him
this episode made me so happy!! the way they all asked genuine questions and were so respectful to one another 💌 it must have been a memorable moment for all of them (the hug at the end was extremely cute!)
Nathan’s support and energy for everyone is just amazing
I know! I think I almost died at 12:20 💀
@@ajaysodumb lol and when he waved at aella walking over and said he was excited to be there☺️pure
he was so excited at the end lol, just like a child tbh! that bye at the end had me laughing haha :)
i agree!
@@kaylanicole5126 Pure? Lmao
i find some of the arguments kinda weird tbh. like that one girl saying about how when violent men have sex, it can help calm them down. i’m sorry but if you are an angry & violent person, you need therapy, not sex. sex is temporary so that will only temporarily fix your anger. and then when that other girl said how sex work saves marriages. honestly i’d rather my partner divorce me & go through that whole shitty experience rather than finding out they are cheating on me bc for whatever reason they feel like they cannot communicate their needs to me.
Agreed
I agree
I personally didn't see it that way. I thought she was more so saying that sex is just another way to release pent up stress that could potentially express itself in physical aggression, etc. Not that they specifically wanted to hurt someone and that sex is an alternative to doing that. Because of you really wanted to hurt people, sex isn't going to deter you from that.
@@etherealnerd but physical aggression is a massive issue in and of itself. if you are physically aggressive, you could hurt somebody & imo that potentially requires therapy, or maybe something else that isn’t sex.
why tf should you be physically aggressive when you are stressed? my mum is a very stressy person but you don’t see her punching anybody. that behaviour is not ok, is unacceptable & sex will not fix your issue of physical aggression.
@@etherealnerd why anyone would want to release their stress at the expense of having someone sexually? Maybe it is not "intimacy" which soothes the anger but a feeling of dominance over someone vulnerable before you?
Angie was so sweet and understanding to the other side, despite not personally agreeing with their opinions. What a great conversation this was!
yah it was expected horror when the virgins said they were christians
She even knew what asexual is, 2 points for her 🥰
@@prod.bexerk8997 I’m a Christian we aren’t crazy lol we just have different beliefs the ones who are rude and horrible are the ones going against what our religion says I love and respect everyone no matter there sexuality, religion, or anything like that even if I don’t agree with it
@@lapris7380 😅😅😭I just red my comments again it's sounds way different then I thought in my head, what meant to say is that I expected the sex workers to be super aggressive towards the virgins when they said the were Christians
@@prod.bexerk8997 oh lol my bad
Everyone in this episode was so sweet and supportive of eachother. AND actually willing to hear out the others sides opinions and perspectives and further questioning them. I want to be friends with everyone in this video!
totally
This is an incredibly privileged, sanitized representation of the reality of sex work.
This.
Yep
💯
Most representations are.
Same for the religious virgins though, they didn't represent the ones who insult, scoff and demonise sex work. There are extreme case scenarios in both sides. The religious virgins were the nicest bunch they could have found but we both know that a lot of them wouldn't have been this sweet to the sex workers.
I can understand both sides except the part about sex with a sex worker saving marriage. If you’re married, you’re basically cheating and that’s so unfair to the partner. Not trying to generalize sex workers. Just saying, we shouldn’t normalize adultery.
I agree but unfortunately it's part of human nature
@@NineToFiveGamerUC0079 evil is in human nature. Rejecting it for discipline is the hard thing to do, but it is also the right thing.
I don't agree with you. There are health conditions where human touch is painful and in those situations the other partner still has sexual desires then sex workers can save the marriage if it is talked about between the couple in these situations. It allows the other partner to still get that sexual desire they may have
@@EHowdy97 but not if they aren’t aware. she never said in the video that him going to an escort was talked about and consented from the wife/partner.
Exactly
"Almost every sex worker I know who has gotten involved with the cops has gotten r*ped by the cops". Wow. That is a horrible experience
I know, that moment shook me. They do it because they’re opportunists that know they can get away with it. Imagine the sex worker claiming that the police officer who caught her and took her in raped her. People will likely think she’s just trying to stir trouble and she won’t be believed.
That's not even taking into consideration how often cops will just turn away sex workers who have been raped. Saying stuff like "you asked for it." "that's part of the job" or other victim blaming crap.
Bruh with her being a sex worker, I would imagine she knows a LOT of other sex workers. Like, not trying to invalidate what she said, but maybe a bit because I highly doubt it's true
@@ItachiUchiha-sh6of It shouldn't be "part of the job", of course. Still, I think that the risk is part of the job. Kinda like if you were an insane stunt person, and then broke a leg. When you're then complaining to the hospital worker, I imagine they would still feel bad, but also be like "damn bruh kinda a risk of the job eh?". Not quite the same thing but I mean it is simply an insanely higher risk in that job and unfortunately that's just how it is. Also not saying the cop shouldn't help the sex worker, but like prob wouldn't feel the same way as if a different person had a similar experience.
@Nixulluve Assuming "almost every" is about 90%, you're saying about 90% of sex workers have gotten raped by cops? Not saying that's impossible, but I am because that's like, pretty impossible
One episode where I was expecting drama but instead it served goodness and stellar communication
I’m only three minutes in and I love Nathan. He seems like such a chill, smart dude to have a coffee with.
And fuck with
@@angelgonzalez5766 LMFAOOOOOOO knew this reply was coming
@Ángel González exactly.
Seems like an ok dude. Feel bad for his fiance.
You can get some cream in your coffee if you want mate
As a virgin ace, I feel like there's a whole other side to this conversation that's getting missed since the only virgins in the conversation are religious. Nothing against the religious stand point, it's valid, duh, but not everyone is a virgin for religious reasons.
To me, sex work is so alien of a concept for someone who experiences life like me that it's kind of fascinating. Like how someone might be fascinated by a great magician. I have no idea what's going on but I'm here for you doing you boo and I have a million and a half questions.
Yeah that's where I'm at in this conversation as well! Like sex work is such a wild but interesting field of work to me. It's so crazy to me that people really get naked and touch privates but also it's super valid and I wouldn't discourage it.
i think this conversation was about whether or not sex workers and religious people who were anti sex could see eye to eye. As for someone who is asexual this kind of conversation would be one of endearment, not disagreement. the point of the yt channel is for people who have polarizing beliefs to come together and talk about their own experiences. typically people who are of religious or spiritual faith have very conservative ideas when it comes to sex. I to was hoping to see an atheist talk about the sort of topic.
We should have a conversation here, if only there would be a sex worker to talk to
I'm a sex worker. You can ask me
Thank you! Literally came to the coments searching for this. And I totally agree. I would have loved it if they had included a virgin ace and where that would have led the discussion
So glad the issue with trafficking was brought up. I wish they had spent more time talking about that because it really is a huge problem that needs more attention. Unfortunately the sex industry plays a part in that and will continue to unless people do something about it. Sex work should only EVER be by choice
This is so true!! Specially in lower income environments and third world countries trafficking is a serious issue being fueled by the porn industry.
Sex work is by definition by choice. If it isn't by choice than it's sexual trafficking
This is a difficult topic and is not one that i feel sex workers have to tackle alone. Let's say I'm a farmer raising cruelty free chickens. Am i also responsible for the millions of farmers who are raising chickens in the most inhumane way? I don't think I have the power, nor the sway, nor the obligation to shut down or change those other farms. I can only be responsible for my chickens and my farm, not the world's.
@@MistaZULE yeah, I never said they did have to tackle it alone. But the industry is blended like that, so they do carry a bit of responsibility being a part of that industry because the industry itself makes things like trafficking easier. As a chicken farmer it says a lot about your ethics if you don't just care about your own backyard, but you work towards ethics in the community altogether.
But also, unethical chicken farming is not even comparable to sex trafficking.
@@Charlie-tq9yb that's not how it works. Trafficking is forcing people to *work*
Many people choose it, and many don't
Sex work is not, by definition, by choice.
This has to be my favorite Middle Ground episode for sure. I love how everyone's just laughing together regardless of which side they're on.
nathan's demeanor and respect, curiosity and open attitude was so attractive in a person. I feel like his corn is probably so much better than the average main strean video because of this background info on who he is!
Corn? You mean porn?
@@nemamodgeddi5338 no she means corn 🌽 he’s a farmer outside of the sex industry life
Yeah he probably cooks really well made corn
i think angie's responses were actually really beautiful when she spoke about her knowing she was a sexual being but only wanting to share that with her husband...
Agreed!
Yea
@@aishaz.a.k7656 u missed the whole point of the video but ight. As if they dont have self respect.....
About the "we (escorts) save marriages" part.
I think it only saves a marriage if both can agree, that they aren't happy with their sex lives anymore but don't want to break up because of it. If they talk about going to an escort service and are okay with their partner having sex with someone else then why not. But if it's happening without telling your partner and they find out about it through another way, it can be really hurtful and trust breaking and then this is the reason why they even got divorced.
The marriages they "save" are already dead, they help keep the corpse intact, for the kids and financial stuff.
They're right though
I agree completely, open and transparent communication is always best in any relationship. However, I imagine in some of those cases, if one partner came to the other with ‘it’s okay that you don’t want to have sex with me, I still love you and want to be with you, but I also want to get my needs met’ would still end that relationship because monogamy is seen as the default and the risk that through that intimacy, that partner might fall in love with someone else and leave them.
Yes, it’s absolutely devastating. My ex cheated on me with escorts. Completely destroyed me
@@aaronweiss3294 not necessarily. there are polygamous people who are in marriages too. I think it's great that people are becoming open about their polygamy, instead of cheating on their partners. and I do agree with the comment you replied to, that escorts only save a marriage if both partners know what's happening and are okay with it.
THhis was the calmest, most respectful conversation I've seen about this. How the virgins and sex workers more respectful than the Christians and the non-christians?!
nothing wrong with being a sex worker, nothing wrong with being a virgin.
your life, you live it how you want
@MorningStar9443 dad?
Well you can’t just leave everything up to the individual without any values and norms in society.
@MorningStar9443 You are misusing that term.
No, it spreads diseases and decays society.
Agree
this was arguably the best jubilee content I've ever come across. And trust me, I'm an avid middle ground fan so i mean it when i say this, from the depths of my heart. I've seen everything. everyone on both sides was so well spoken, educated, and well-intentioned. i love the way everyone was laughing at each other, lightheartedly. laughter is the best medicine and the best common ground; this video was filled with respect and love for people that have extremely opposing sides. we need more of this.
jubilee if you're reading this right now and you ever want to produce any more content on mental health. please include me. I'm just an ordinary person, but it would be my greatest blessing and i would carry so much pride to be a part of something so amazing and revolutionary. your work is amazing and I have the utmost respect for what you guys stand for and promote. opposing sides having a positive and productive conversation, and people coming together on middle ground is what we desperately need in this country. thank you for all that you do.
everyone inthis video was so wise. you guys did an incredible job with choosing all of these amazing people.i simply cannot get over this video.
I agree to a point, I think Jubilee could of delved deeper in more about the sex trafficking and connections to the industry, instead it was mostly statements about religious views (which will always have a bias).
I agree. I actually love it when they all share laughs cuz it makes them feel like they on the same page. It demonstrates a great deal of respect, maturity, understanding, and communication skills
agreed ! well said.
The only reason why I’m still a virgin is not religious or marital at all. I just haven’t found someone who I feel is worthy enough for me to give it up. I crave giving it to someone I love and who loves me, that would be an experience worth waiting for xx
exactly me too!!!!
Keep it up! Take care of your worth
@@rosegangsta4531 it’ll be worth it trust me 🥰
@@popcornmovietrailer960 thank you so much 🥰❤️
The only reason I’m still a virgin is because I’m 14 and don’t think I can bear the responsibility of a child 😭
She said sex work could save marriages, but she also mentioned it as being a band aid on an issue in their relationship. I don't see a band aid "saving" a marriage. It seems like a quick easy short-term solution to a long-term issue. I understand her view, but counseling and therapy is one of the better avenues for such issues.
I'm a 21yr old virgin and I don't see virginity till marriage as something amazing nor do I put it on a pedestal. But I do know science have proven that sex with people who u r attached to emotionally is much better than random sex. Th marriage part is mostly a religious thing rather than a morality thing. Being a virgin isn't a measure of how pure a person is but neither is it a bad thing. Having sex before marriage isn't a bad thing either. I hate virgin shaming and sl*t shaming people.
Hi Sunny! I can definitely say sex is not something to be put on a pedestal because even though it is one of the most beautiful forms of intimacy, it is not the only one. I waited until I found my life partner and it was not intentional and that emotional connection makes it amazing because you don’t seek others at all. Stay virgin if that’s what you want because it is a beautiful thing to experience with someone who you truly love and loves you.
Are you virgin because religious reason?
@@Ellieprez I agree with u. I'm just going with the flow tbh I'm not depressed cuz I'm not having sex nor am I gonna abstain from it intentionally. Emotions do matter alot. Some marriages last while some don't. Idk how my life is gonna be but if I want to have sex it's gonna be with someone who I love and who loves me alot.
@@kristianprigl7895 no. Not for any religious reasons. Its just the way my life has been. Idk how to explain it. Btw I'm not asexual by any means.
I think it's much safer to have sex with someone you're emotionally connected to (not necessarily married, but at least in a more serious relationship where the two of you already know each other well enough), because it can be very dangerous to have that type of intimacy with someone you just met at a nightclub or something. You must first know if the person is violent, unreliable, jealous, controlling or has any other character flaws before going to bed with them.
5:09 I disagree here. You aren't "saving a marriage" by being the sex worker the husband hires to get his rocks off. That doesn't fix their lack of connection, trust, and lust with their partner. I argue that men in those situations need to learn to leave those situations instead of just satisfying their pleasures elsewhere. Also I doubt any of those wives would love that their husband was seeking sex elsewhere instead of communicating their needs or actually leaving the relationship first before cheating.
And she agreed that she wouldnt like to be married to a dude who hires someone else for sex... Then why do to others something you know its not right in terms of morals?
@@MrCheesecake1928 because its a morally grey issue rather than a black and white one. Who knows maybe the husband loves everything about his wife and doesnt want to leave her but also really enjoys sex that his wife cant provide to him. Or maybe the marriage is failing and he should leave the wife for someone else. Noone knows what kind of value sex holds to those men, especially not her. She doesnt have the knowledge to judge whether its the right choice or not.Thats something the husbands should realise themselves since theyre the ones who know their own situations the best.
@@tibi9733 exactly..studies show that not all men that cheats/have sex with another woman while married means that they don't unconditionally love thier spouse.. on the other hand if a woman cheats there's a way higher chance that she doesn't love her spouse and is just using him.. ....
It is still wrong for men to cheat. Tho
“Tell me you have a low IQ without telling me you have a low IQ”
@@thelastkushbendr7091 to who?
Hey it’s Jake. The reason why I am strict with my sexual views is for my personal growth. I don’t look down on anyone that does it differently. Much Love ❤️
I appreciate that you are open about it because there are many guys out there who are ashamed and feel as if they are disadvantaged because of the stereotypes surrounding virginity.
I was a virgin until 22. I heard a lot of the same comments. No need to explain why you are as people should respect it regardless.
More grace to stay strong and be joyful, in Jesus Christ name.
I do SW and I respect your views!
From Frenship?
These people really compared themselves to nurses and claimed selling sex saves lives with a straight face . I cant
@romanaa7070 Ikr🤣
Totally agreed with Nathan. Better sex education better parenting. I’d rather my 3 kids have a super uncomfortable conversation with them instead of them learning from porn or their friends
Agreed, I tell my nieces all the time no matter the question. I'd rather they ask me an uncomfortable question over putting themselves in danger.
As someone who is a virgin for non religious reasons, I would have loved more representation (:
Yeah this was more like 'sex workers vs religious people'
What's your reason? Other than it not having happened yet or asexuality, that is.
@@RandomStreak-eo my reason is that I’m waiting to be in a relationship with someone I truly care about and that hasn’t happened yet
@@Oumaima500 me too! Just the thought of having sex with any random person just doesn’t seem very desiring to me
@@arianam.1571 same, it takes me forever to trust someone in a regular relationship...let alone bringing this other part into it.
I’m sorry homegirl lost me when she said we save marriages 😂😂
Same 😄😄😄
I agreed with her on everything except that. If I found out my husband did that marriage over. In fact of it came down to that I would rather the marriage be over instead
@@darkangelprincess101 but you wouldn't know, so you'll be fine and so will your marriage, that's the success in her words playing through
Not all marriages have sex at the center of the relationship, and put more value on emotional intimacy, companionship. One spouse may be unable to have sex, so the other will go outside the marriage to meet that need. This even happens sometimes with the other spouse's consent.
@@thegreatwesternbengalproje2863 gross if my husband killed my mom and I didn’t know that does that mean it helps my marriage? Not knowing doesn’t mean it’s okay
This wasn't sex workers vs virgins, this was sex workers vs religious nutcases.
1 - Nathan is a very a open-minded person and he knows what he says and what he stands for
2 - there's nothing Wrong with being a sex worker as long as you're protecting your body, and at the end of the day everybody is free to do what they want,
their body their choice
True. But let's be honest would you like to be seen associating with these sex workers in public?
@@dave1T I wouldn't mind. would you ? wow, its 2022 I thought we were beyond this by now, especially the western countries.
why would you mind ?
besides, nobody is forcing you to go "associate with them in public" if you don't want to.
There’s everything wrong with being a sex worker. It is the least respectful profession throughout all of human history
@@dave1T your question makes no moral sense, I don't judge people based on their jobs I only care about how they think, and these sex workers are seem very open-minded I'd definitely love to hang out with them
Anytime y'all do things with virgins, they're always hella religious. The conversation always boils down to what Christians think about sex.
Where are the asexuals or the virgins that wish they weren't a virgin or the virgins that's are struggling to find someone to have sex with?
Not every virgin is a virgin by choice.
Not all virgins are Christians.
This ^^
This thank you. There are so many people who just haven’t found someone they love enough to give their virginity too. That’s most virgins.The religious people are the extreme side.
@@adrianna5378 lol who do you know that loves someone enough to give up sex? 😆
@@imanigordon6803 I meant they haven’t found someone they love enough or trust to lose their virginity with.
@@adrianna5378 oh my bad I misunderstood
I am blown away by how respectful everyone here was. I think this is the first Jubilee episode where I didn’t hear one sideways comment or any form of disrespect. It was so genuinely uplifting and they were all so well spoken. Thank you to everyone in the video!
The audacity to say sex work saves marriages or comparing sex work to being a nurse. Some people are just delusional.
i was blown away by that smh
Genuinely though
Truly disrespecful to nurses. Would they say the same to doctors, veretinarians...? I don't know but It seems sexist 🧑🏻🦯
This!
womp womp
Yet Again I’d love to see NON-RELIGIOUS Virgins or Virgins whose virginity is not due to their religion or waiting til marriage
Not gonna find them lol
@@SacredTruthing haha I was one of them :)
@@SacredTruthing I guess I don't exist then xD and I'm not a teenager anymore
@@stupidlysmart13 then what is your reason?
@@Halvale then what is your reason?
As someone who’s been sexually assaulted and has a very mixed relationship with my body and sexuality...this has been such a heartwarming conversation to watch tbh. Thank you guys for hosting this because sex in general can be a very touchy subject. The sex workers and the people who are virgins were so open and understanding...overall I’m happy and a little emotional in the best way possible
I experienced date rape. Traumatizing for me. This open, gentle conversation feels healing to me.
😢💔
@@LL-cs2tr me too. this was great to hear.
I know this lady didn’t just say cheating on your spouse with an escort perseveres the marriage. Oh what a world we’ve come to 😭
Facts
Right, I had to rewind to make sure my ears were working 😂😂
The world has been worse
Nah because I wouldn’t hesitate to accidentally lock my spouse out of the house and mail divorce papers 🤣
Yes that was ridiculous… their should’ve been a wife there to tell how that does not save marriages
This may be the healthiest episode I’ve ever seen. These folks were just so respectful of one another and actually wanted to learn and share. So cool
Kind of wish they got more diverse virgins religion/non-religion wise..
Right? How do they get 3 religious people 🤔
Everyone in the video grew up Christian, like…?
@@iheartjbgccb because most adults who are virgins are likely religious???
@@h3llboyyy407 not true
@@h3llboyyy407 not really ,some are demi sexuals , asexuals or simply stucked in a super religious society and cant experience the sexual experience freely without being shamed or even puting their lives in danger
As someone who was a virgin and waited to have sex with someone and then quite literally fucked up and ended up having sex - I justified it by saying well we are getting married anyway. That sexual guilt pushed me to a really unhealthy relationship and 100% would’ve ended up in divorce. I really caution people to not make an idol of sex because we are animals who have desire and this can cloud or judgement and sometimes fall in love with the wrong people.
I’m not really sure what this comment is trying to say. This seems mostly to be an issue of dealing with regret and not letting regret consume you
@@mariellegomez5089 no
You were being convicted.
If anything this video shows how we as people can have civilized conversations about sex. Having conversations like this should be normalized, and I’m not talking about having sex or not having sex being normalized, but more of being able to talk about it honestly and being able to express opinions.
Absolutely
"She's _only_ slept with _13_ people" is wild 😭
Fr
Oh.....
Is it?
@@TheBritishCigarette THATS ALOT
@@JosephineSimmons776 oh....
Huh.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I have a feeling that these sex workers are the "privileged" sex workers. Not the kind that live in 3rd world countries and are forced to perform sex work to survive and don't have the tools to protect themselves. I wish they talked about the way the sex/porn industry regularly exploits women, not to mention when it involves children. Not just women from third world countries, but the women in America who are exploited and trafficked.
Eyo! What's going on with yo profile pic 🤣😭💀
@@marho_ok5626 LMAO but they got a point
@@marho_ok5626 don’t worry about that lmao
Gorilla Grip what?? 😭
I understand wanting to hear that conversation but seems like not the place for a sex workers v virgins discussion. Maybe sex workers that are “privileged” and people who have been forced into it can have a conversation about it.
Me and my partner have been together for 3 years and haven’t had sex for the past year. We ultimately lost sexual attraction to one another but love each other more than anything. Sex is not something every couple needs in order to be in a happy and healthy relationship. Don’t feel pressured to think sex is the most important part of a relationship- for me at least, it’s about the emotional connection and love you share for eachother
big chance your partner is getting it from someone else
@@RapBlas bruh what, not every relationship is toxic, sorry about whoever hurt you
@@RapBlas found the person who does in fact think that sex is the only important thing in a relationship
@@Sarah-po7ik I mean the fact yous said you lost sexual attraction for each other and haven’t had sex in the past year does give the impression your partner is getting it from else where you don’t just lose sexual attraction for someone you love
This is extremely interesting to me
I’d love to see too a hypersexual/ someone who really enjoys sex VS asexuals, and the different perspectives of the intimacy and the connection VS the non-need to, and distaste toward it
I also think a [people attracted to women] VS [people attracted to men] would be pretty interesting too, and then maybe bring in the bisexuals/ people into enbies as the translator type haha
Do you mean high libido, or hypersexuality? Cause hypersexuality is a medical or trauma based thing, not a sex drive thing?
@@AvaNightingaleI learned something new
My husband and I were virgins until marriage. I was nearly 27 and he was 36. We both had dated people beforehand. I really wish I hadn’t even held hands with or kissed other people before my husband. I cannot imagine how it feels when you’ve slept with others. I am thankful, after eighteen years of marriage, that we have no one to compare the other with.
i'm sorry-and without any disrespect to the woman who said this-in what world is having an affair with a sex worker going to save someone's marriage? adultery is a leading cause of divorce! if during a lull or difficult time my husband decided to be intimate with another person behind my back, THAT would end the marriage. i can't even begin to understand her logic or line of thinking
trust me, most people agree with your viewpoint, virgin or not
Not to mention that cheating causes way more damage to the other person than just ending a failed relationship, and I think most people who have been cheated on would agree, including myself. Her point made absolutely no sense.
they’re literally delusional and so self righteous
@@autumn7247 “Tell me you have a low IQ without telling me you have a low IQ”
One this is almost correct cheating is not the leading cause of divorce getting caught is. Two you seem to lack the ability to see circumstances other than your own where this would be a viable option especially if the spouse was informed beforehand. I’m not saying cheating is ok but in some cases it’s not the worst option.
I want to see a Middle Ground thing between present sex workers and former sex workers who left the profession
THIS.
Mia Kalifa
Why do you assume sex workers who left the profession will be against it?
I’m sure it’s a demanding but lucrative job which some might not want to do forever - doesn’t mean they hate it.
If someone quit a travelling circus for a more normal life you wouldn’t assume they hated working in the circus - so why do you assume former sex workers hated their proffesion?
I know several ex strippers who don’t hate it at all but they’ve moved on with life.
@@poocrayon4588 “Tell me you have a low IQ without telling me you have a low IQ”
@@poocrayon4588 where did she assume that they hate it?
So, sex CAN be the ultimate form of intimacy, in fact in many relatioships it is. But it doesn't have to be in every relationship. In fact even in the relationships where it is other factors contribute to building that intimacy. Basically intimate sex is what you can achieve but the sex is not responsible for building the intimacy, it is merely the fruit of it.
who knew, it's not black and white like so many people thought
You are absolutely right.
geez Big Bars right here 🔥🙌
well said!
This is just my opinion, but even though I agree that sex is a great form of intimacy, intimacy itself can be interpreted and shown in many different ways. It's not always about just doing it full force or taking your time, enjoying the foreplay or "build up", if you will. I've never had sex, but I know this is something I want when both my partner and I decide on it mutually.
they are so different yet so wholesome on these topics i feel like those hugs are totally genuine
Aella is absolutely gorgeous and she seems so kind and down-to-earth. Everyone here seemed to know exactly what they were talking about. Avery is interesting too. Sex workers seem to have an entirely different life philosophy. I can definitely understand the complication of sexuality and Judeo-Christian religions.
i’m just curious, not trying to be accusatory but is there a reason you said judeo-christian instead of just abrahamic? like was islam excluded for a specific reason?
don't lump us Jews into this lol
@@willbrockman
You must not be very familiar with Judaism then for such teaches abstinence.
exactly , different life philosophy
@@efemenaipoko2205 I wish I could be more open with my sexuality but I don't think I could do it. I know variety is the spice of life, I just don't think I want to sleep with too many people.
As an asexual, I'm so happy that they mentioned our existence. We are usually completely invalidated in these kinds of conversations.
I noticed the christian lady mentioned it. Is asexuality accepted in religions? Because I know homosexuality isn't in most.
@@somebrid2147 depends, some might say being asexual is perversion of the natural order by not feeling attraction/desiring sex with others whilst others would praise it as a pinnacle of godly purity
@@somebrid2147 Its pretty much abstinence. In one of the books written by Paul I believe he mentions some are called to lead a life of abstinence but its usually not because they lack desire.
@@levinorton8676 are you saying that asexuality is the same as abstinence or that christians see it as abstinence? because if you meant the former, that isn't the case at all. a lot of asexuals have sex, they just don't have sexual desire or they don't have as much sexual desire as an average allosexual.
@@somebrid2147 Asexuality is 100% accepted in Christianity keep in mind that a lot of monks were celibate
Is it possible to do a video on people who waited till marriage and ended up getting divorced & ask if they regret waiting till marriage, what they learned, if they still have the same views on waiting till marriage, if they would recommend it (after what they’ve experienced), etc.
please this
Yes this will be great. I've read some articles about this online
Yes! I wish I could remember the article I read awhile back but this woman waited til marriage & got divorced like 5 years later. Basically she said she had to learn what she liked & didn’t because she always went towards what her husband like
@@breonawarren1507 oh shii I never really thought of it that way. Ig iss true tho cus of how more religious women are brought up
This is literally the most respectful conversation ever
As someone who's ace, I'm honestly so surprised that a few of them actually referenced asexuality, like, even the "sex is something almost everyone engages with" or however they said it, but they didn't say it was everyone, and I just really appreciate that they actually acknowledged that asexuality is a real legit thing in this
I understand that peoples wives or partners owe you no loyalty but to sit there and say that you're in support of people cheating on their partners in order to "save" their marriage Is wrong on so many levels.
Yeah, I definitely didn’t agree with that take. Marriage counseling exists for a reason!
Fax
So true.
@@NatTheCatt communication exists for a reason! That's all that was needed. To pay for sex is an easy cop out than talking to your partner 🤔
I was about to say… chile… ain’t that cheating? 😭 a better approach to marital issues is directly talking to your wife about the issues at hand
it'd be interesting to have a video from chosen sexworkers and people who were trafficked bc it is two very different worlds
I’m triggered and traumatized by this statement and I’m not of either world. That would be a VERY interesting one!
I don't think anyone on this panel is for slavery, which is what sex trafficking is. Let's not conflate voluntary sex work with forced or coerced sex work.
@@e.pluribusunum7916 mmmmm... We can have different perspectives, and that's okay! You can get trafficked in many ways. I work with a lot of victims who were voluntary at first and then it all got out of control.
I don't believe there is a lot of instances where sexwork is voluntary (i was in the field for 10 years), and I think it's kind of gross to glamourize the industry as an empowering choice for women who have the money and safety to do it that way, all while women and children are still suffering, sacrificing their bodies for survival.
I mean, one side is consenting and one side isn't. It's like saying you want one side to be people who have had sex and one side to be people who were r@ped.
@@E.primordial94 That's like saying we should stop having sex, because there are people who r@pe. Have you ever considered the fact that trafficking wouldn't be such a thing, if prostitution were legalised? There would be so many regulations involved, that they wouldn't be able to hide away as easily. Sometimes, making things illegal doesn't make it dissappear; it just makes it worse.
So impressed with Aella. Rudy and Avery too. It's often the groups you "least expect" who are the most well-spoken, collected and calm on this channel. You learn so much about life in the trenches, more than most do in sheltered places.
That said, Angie and the others were also thoughtful and fair!
Nathan is seriously so supportive of the other side as well as his own i love him
This is by far one the best middle ground episodes you've done.
People went in willing to listen, to educate, and to change their minds. Not just argue their positions and clap back at the other side.
When she said “we save marriages” that’s when I drew the line, that’s what breaks marriages not fixes them, if u r not being pleased by ur partner talk to them! If nth works divorce ! Adultery/cheating isn’t Noble tf?
Whenever a place legalises prostitution, the divorce rate drops
@@theguywhoisaustralian1465 Correlation does not equal causation. Maybe legalised prostitution means degenerate men are comfortable with sex workers and don't get into relationships that lead to marriage. It doesn't indicate "prostitution is the antidote for a failing marriage!"
@@theguywhoisaustralian1465 and it’s the choice of the cheaters to cheat on their partners
@@sjb_92 Hey, she said like Right After That Point, that it's NOT an antidote for marriage, like not at ideal at all. I don't think she expressed that point in the best way either, but I get what she meant. It preserves it on paper for a time, but is not ideal in a monogamous committed relationship.
@@nemi4364 I was responding to the guy above me.
I love how straightforward and considerate they where saying their side of the story and the way they tried to actually understand the other point pf view
I wasn’t expecting this, but this genuinely went so much better than I thought it would. Everyone was so friendly and respectful to eachother. It was really nice to see.
Cheating does not save a marriage. It may make the person realize they want to be with their partner but it damages the relationship
The relationship is dead anyway, they're not having sex
I love how supportive Nathan is.
Honestly this is the best episode I've seen and the shortest. That last statement was the first time I've seen everyone agree or change their mind.
I love how respectful everyone is towards eachother :) it's nice to see people have a conversation rather than yelling at eachother, like a lot of these videos tend to be like
Never watched the video, but glad to read this when I do - or if I do not.
Nathan is just one solid A+ guy. I love hearing him talk.
He looks like Charlie Putt.
Sex work doesn't save marriages. That is just absurd to say. It increases the temptation to cheat, making the marriage fall harder than it would have.
Not to mention that it also reinforces human trafficking. It is not helping society AT ALL
This comment in delusional
I completely disagree
It absolutely can save marriages. If someone in a marriage could no longer perform sex, whether it be through a disability, illness or by choice, and the partner still needed to have sex. Through communication and consent, the partner can seek out a professional sex worker to have their needs met, while still being in their marriage.
Try being in a sexless marriage for 20+ years and see if you still believe that
This is genuinely the best middleground that I have ever watched
Is no one going to talk about the horrendously bad take that sex work “saves lives” by giving violent men intimacy ???? Consent should never be a commodity, but least of all commodified for violent misogynists - surely this is not a controversial opinion????
It's not that black and white
i thought that too
I'll play "devil's advocate" so to speak. An argument could be made that visiting a sex worker could be a healthy Avenue for stress relief. Much like playing violent videogames or sports. Its also been said that the advent of the internet also helped reduce violent crime. So I think thats more what they were referring to.
@@EricTitansSmith care to elaborate?
@@ItachiUchiha-sh6of I know that’s what they meant I just think that is a terrible take lol. I think it is very wrong to compare sex - which should involve ONLY consenting adults - to hobbies like you mentioned, which don’t involve intimate physical relationships. Also I’m interested to know where you’ve seen the internet reduce violent crime?
If people have a problem with not having the amount of intimacy they want in a relationship then leave. Why cheat? Why be selfish because seeking attention from a sex worker is only damaging if not agreed upon by both parties. P*rn is also so damaging to relationships. People want what they can’t have… well go get what you truly want then and move on from your partner. Especially if that is not discussed in the relationship and kept a secret. P*rn (majority) is also not educational at all. It’s unrealistic and if that is also the only source of “education” then true intimacy and satisfaction will never be reached.
All men watch porn for the simple reason that it’s a quick way to get off when no ones around. Obviously your partner isn’t going to be avaliable or up for a quickie every time you feel like it - hence porn.
You think if men didn’t have porn they wouldn’t still be masturbating to what they didn’t have and just thinking of their gf or wife lol? Of course not and neither do women.
Amen
It really comes down to IF it's cheating or not. If you talk to your spouse about it and you both agree it's a healthy outlet that's not an issue, it's only an issue if your sneaking around to see escorts.
I believe that very often, a marriage isn’t always about hyper-romantic love or sexual passion. And fairly often, a marriage turns into a partnership and an obligation. When finances are intertwined and there are children, divorce doesn’t feel like an option. If the sexual relationship in a marriage is over but one parter still feels like he needs that release or connection, he should be able to have it. If he is in that scenario, he should tell is wife.
“Tell me your low iq without telling me your low iq”
Couldn't click fast enough.
Nathan is just the cutest, he's just so happy to be there. And I kinda wish yall didn't cut Avery when she said "every sex work she knows who has had an encounter with the cops has been raped by the cops. People need to 1. Heard that and 2. Think about that. I feel you rushed that point
Are we freaks?
He's cutie 🐈
Agreed! I wanted to see the others reaction to that comment and have them discuss it! That's shocked me and angered me
Came across this channel recently and I just love this concept. The open end conversations about literally any topic, sharing ideas, thoughts, beliefs, without judgement, and even being open to look the other side of things which you wouldn't have otherwise is just amazing.
We need more openness and inclusively like this in our generation.
i think we need more openess like this in humanity in general
I came in expecting to judge both sides in one way or another and feel like I’ve actually learned quite a lot. I honestly think this might be the best middle ground episode they’ve done so far I am very surprised.
Nathan was very well spoken I liked how he explained his ideas and ways.
The biggest problem with sex is often lack of communication. Successful sex workers have to become very skilled in clear, direct communication regarding their body/sex and I think that is something all of us not in that career path should really learn and embrace. I can’t even begin to imagine how many relationships (one night stands, marriages, friends with benefits, etc) would be improved by that level of openness.
This comment is hilarious
@@shelbyspeaks3287 how is it hilarious? Lol communication is very important in every aspect of life?
It's just true idk how it's funny
@@allyrose6437 wasn’t the sex worker just talking about affairs helping marriages? 😂
@@imanigordon6803 okay? And? She explained a little more what she meant by it, also what does that have to do with my question and this person's comment???????
@@allyrose6437 Sex workers aren’t great at communicating if they have those conclusions
Saying “you sell your body for money” and then saying “we all sell our bodies and time and energy for money” is just playing with words.