There is a viral video of a woman sharing her pregnancy story. Her mother-in-law wanted to see her giving birth with her husband 🤢 and the daughter-in-law obviously said no. But her husband enabled his mothers predatory behavior and let in. His mother recorded her giving birth and posted it on family group chat. This is the most disguisting story i have ever heard in a while, where a older woman do not understand privacy and pain of other woman and sabotage her most vulnarable moment. If i was her, i would've kicked the useless mommy issue husband and his mother out of the hospital 😂
How is wanting that predatory? I wouldn't mind my boyfriend's mother being there for my delivery because she's a doctor, plus my mom lives in a different state. But recording it is very strange... weird behavior
Oh oh these types of moms are going to have a hard time hearing the truth about themselves. This is what happens when you continuously give birth for reasons that are selfish and unhealthy, but then turn around and call child-free by choice women selfish 🙄
Nowadays, you definitely have to be selfish to some degree to have children. Everyone is selfish and everyone will try to justify their choice to act like they aren't selfish.🤷🏾♀️
My aunt did this with her son, and emotionally neglected her daughter. Now that son is 24 years old, has never held a job, eating all of her groceries, and stealing valuables for weed money. Even though her daughter had some bumps starting out, she now has her own daughter, works as a dental assistant, and is back in school to become a dental hygienist. Whenever I see these emotionally incestuous relationships, I only feel pity for the son, and the next woman they leech on to who they expect to be their surrogate mother 🥴
Ditto toxic fathers. men are not as exempt from blame as they like to think they are. If they are the "leaders" that we women are supposed to kowtow to, they are making a piss-poor showing on every level.
"After the free trial was up, then everything started happening" I vote we start calling the time period before the switch up, the free trial period. Because that is a perfect description of it. Once this people think they have you locked down in a difficult to cancel membership, suddenly the hidden fees and penalties show up.
Some of the most fantastic men I have been with were big time providers. They were not afraid to take care of me: whether it be giving flowers, bringing me coffee in the morning or even bringing medicine when I didn't feel well. This dynamic was completely flipped for the guys with Mommy Issues. You spot it a mile away. No grand gestures, no nice dates, no words of affirmation or really any signals that they will treat you well in the relationship. They expect YOU to do everything for them. RUN!
Mine doesn't have mommy issues because she died when he was very young and he still got those same "treating women like that" issues😂it's literally the trenches out here
I really used to believe that men raised by single mothers were more inclined to respect and appreciate women. Boy, was it a shock to find out that NO, the reality is they grow up in their feminine energy expecting women's LABOR to be free and unconditionally available to them. Sorry for all the boys born to deadbeat dads out there, as their circumstances are not their fault, but those men are disqualified from the dating pool!
OH BABY THOSE ARE TRULY THE WORSE ! those are the ones who blame their mothers for the fathers not being around and they will never respect women! They think all women should pay for their entire existence! Those are your cheaters ! Those are the ones who’s around and do the main chick / side chick thing !!!
AGREED. A mature person has a mature relationship with their parents. That means if you and your parents don’t get along you cut them off or keep a distant but cordial relationship with them. An adult being all, “I HATE YOU MOMMY” ain’t a good or grown up look.
My dad was a mama's boy. He told my mom flat out i will always choose her. I was also dragged into it as well. She was very mean to me and my brother, Like abuse level mean. One time i vividly remember crying to my dad to help us and he said shes my mom i can't. We ate a peice of food she wanted and made us sit at the table for over 5 hours. To this day almost 20 years later i still ask if i can eat or get something to drink in my own house. Its almost like a reflex at this point.
Someone needs to cover the men with daddy issues. I've seen stuff about women with daddy issues, women with mommy issues, men with mommy issues, but not men with daddy issues.
I am Moroccan and in my culture it's the standard that men are married to their mother and wives are a evil necessity to have grandchildren. The wife is always second best and easily disposable. The children too which causes the next generation of Mother emashed men. Absent fathers, overbearing and emotional neglected mothers. The World Cup gave a good glimpse of that. I know this sick culture isn't unique to Morocco but I speak of my own people because I wan them to do better.
Here’s an insider scoop ladies. If his mom lives in his house, he will treat her like his wife, and any girlfriend like a concubine. If they’re “taking care of their mother” they are not available. Effectively in a relationship with mom.
Emotional Incest: 1. "also called covert incest, describes an unhealthy family dynamic where a parent relies on their child for emotional and practical advice and support. Despite the name, it doesn’t involve physical sexual abuse: “Incest” refers to inappropriate emotional closeness." 2. "a form of emotional abuse where a parent or primary caregiver treats their child like a romantic partner, relying on them for the emotional support a partner would typically provide." EDIT: commented before watching the full vid, but imma leave these up anyways. But it's unfortunate because, while I understand what the women are doing is wrong and abusive, I also understand that the women are using their sons because they are not in suitable partnerships (either b/c physically single or married single moms). It's a choice and these women are responsible, but I think it's something to consider.
EDIT: Commented before finishing the videos cause I got big triggered LOL but imma leave this comment up anyways. Also, when I think about it, I believe there's at least 2 types of outcomes in these dynamics, with the possibility of a combo effect: (1) the types where the mothers infantalize their sons and breed the weaponized incompetent man-children. These moms tell you how you'll *_never_* be good enough for their precious baby boy, or take care of him like _sheee_ does 🙄🙄🙄. These men will expect you to act like a slave cause their moms did everything for them, and the mothers will encourage the idea of your inherent inferiority to these men. Or (2) they adultify their sons via emotional incest and create unhealthy dynamics and competition because _they_ want to be the woman in his life - they are the ones who've groomed their sons to take care of them and essentially drop everything they're doing to take care of mommy dearest - he'll always concede to her and have terrible boundaries with her because she's raised him to feel guilty about not meeting her needs, since he was the "only man she can rely on." These men are emotionally unavailable because their mothers occupy the intimate partner space and cannot give it over to you. You'll always be put last in this relationship, and he will allow her to violate and disrespect your boundaries again and again - and she will, because she has none and she destroyed her son's optimum opportunities to ever develop his own.
Emotional incest is so much more than that… it’s so much worse, and it’s ALWAYS an extremely painful, violating, and development-stunting type of abuse. The emotional incest that these men are in must be to a much smaller degree than what most people who experience it go through.
I wish i could have seen your videos 10 years ago. How many of us blame ourselves for YEARS trying to live a fantasy and nobody notices that we are in an unhealthy relationship that is like a dark hopeless pit and we don't know any better, because this is somehow normal, because there's just not enough discussion about this. I hope this content reaches everyone out there and i hope the algorithm recommends it to all the momma's boys too and that they will feel personally attacked
Girl, I used to read so many books on how to improve myself as a woman and a wife!!! Years I worked on myself! We were always working on improving me, never him, bc he was perfect and fantastic ofcourse!
Definitely be on the lookout for the other side of the spectrum of men that hate and/or have a negative viewpoint on their mom without proper reason. Men that have a vested interest in being hostile/disrespectful to their mother that’s shown to be rooted in misogyny rather than based on her individual actions are red flags. Because they also look for ‘mommy’ in women, but instead of another mom to replace her with, they’re looking for a woman like their mom to punish her. It took a long time to realize one of my ex’s resentment toward his mother wasn’t because she ‘broke up the family’ with divorce as he claimed. It was because she refused to continue to jeopardize her and her kids livelihoods and safety, and then ended up thriving with a business completely on her own while the dad still robbed Paul to pay Peter and had any endeavors he tried to scam his kids into fail. Myself being a successful, self sufficient woman who met my bum ex yrs ago didn’t understand the constant accusations of me being ‘selfish’ and overall disrespect while supporting him in all the ways someone can support their partner. Even when he put us in a bind (in hindsight, on purpose), I couldn’t figure out why this man got angry that his shortcomings didn’t affect me. Until one day it clicked that it wasn’t me he was angry and bitter at, but rather whose role I was given to reenact so he can have a different, preferred outcome.
My ex mother was the absolute worst everything she did or said was right and everything I did or said was wrong these mamas boys in my experience are the absolute worst
Listen to these wise words,,,I'm 57 years old, and have a 56 year old mama's boy for a boyfriend. HIs 83 year old mother lives in the in law suite, and it is absolute hell, no joke. Run like the wind and never look back. I'm trying to get out
My half brother is a son-husband. He is very toxic and mean and my mother enables his behaviour. He cant form a bond with anyone except his mother. My mother is toxic as well and she has borderline and narcistic tendencies and my brother took her behaviour over. He will be 31 soon and he is embarrased to be around men his age, because my brother still lives with his mother and does not plan to leave soon. I always feel anxiety being aroung them and they really love to gossip about others... and they also like to bully me and slander my name in the house. But at this point I am rather hated by my family, then cuddled into an emotionally retarded stunted adult-child
Uh yeah, I was in such a relationship for almost 7 years. It was a living hell.... She and her sister are both holding on extremly onto their sons and sabotage every relationship they get in. It was like having a relationship with him and her as he had to go to her for everything, he never had his own opinion, couldn't argue or discuss without going to her first. He couldn't do anything, completely helpless without her as she never raised him to be a grown, self-sufficient and life skilled adult. She held him in a constant depending on her teenage status and I had to pay more, managed all the finances, contracts, household, emotional labor, etc all while having a job, and going to study school every Saturday and Sunday, it was so draining After the break up the only thing I felt was relief! I was just glad to be out of it and never ever have to deal with her or him again. Since that day 5.5 years ago I'm single, childfree, celibate and not interested in dating 🙂
@@NightinGal89 no, she could support herself fine! But she never raised him that he could exist without her support. Guess she wanted to be needed all the time and liked the attention she got through this.
I learned my ex and his mom both had that dependent thing. He actually acts he’s her man. He took bring the man of the house to another level where it’s toxic and unhealthy and thinks he can do it to everyone. She never established a boundary. Then gets upset when he crosses a line like he’s her father. Every excuse in the book for both. I learn to never to be around anyone like that.
I'm a black woman. My white ex-fiancé was emotionally enmeshed with his mommy. The father was neglectful and psychologically and verbally abusive. My ex, while still a child, advised his mom to leave his dad. She did and they divorced. She adultified him, having her safekeep all her money in his bank account and telling him since childhood that women would only want him for his money. She was nice to me until we became engaged and then she began interfering in our relationship in every way she could. He did nothing, not challenging her as she attacked me to my face and behind my back to him, their family and people I didn't know in the unfamiliar town I'd just moved to days earlier. He simply whined and felt sorry for himself. I left him and want nothing to do with him. Years later, he's texting me for another chance. I'd sooner chew off my arm.
My ex’s mother was exactly like this. She was like a stalker. Constantly calling, making up stories, begging him to come help her, and calling me trying to influence our big move out of the city. She went nuts at 73 years old like a child. He would text her these huge messages of love and adoration and then tell me how much he can’t stand her. Well guess what? He chronically cheated on me and told me he needed someone who could get along with his mom. Both were the fakest people I’ve ever met in my life. He’s now with a mini version of his bat-shit crazy ass mom. Good riddance.
@@missminti my ex-fiancé's mother had mental health problems, also. It was a free pass to curse me out and verbally abuse without provocation. He ordered me to ignore it. I used to think that a man loving and looking after his mother was a sign that he respects women and would do the same for his wife. Now I see it as a red flag. Men are apparently unable to give that energy (can't call it love) to more than one woman at a time. I'm a daddy's girl and never had that struggle and would never tolerate my father acting like a jealous boyfriend.
My dad was a momma's boy, my grandma w 5:55 as narcissistic and had an emotionally incestous relationship with her kids. Needless to say, my mom suffered a lot and when she divorced, she started glowing.
10 years of pure hell with a man that was a mama's boy. She recklessly contributed to personally breaking up four marriages because she had three sons, two of which were mama's boys. The first son was married and divorced and then married me and divorced and was engaged and then THAT woman broke it off after spending time with this mother. The second son married and divorced, this one was interesting because the son's wife was visiting her sister in TX and turned around and got a job in TX and asked the husband to join her and he went to live with his mom, instead of going to his wife and children who was trying to escape the mom. Then the last son got married and divorced. Got married again and ALMOST divorced but they moved to AZ to escape her. All the daughter in laws including myself were having a discussion one day and we all agreed that if given the chance, she would have slept with all three of her sons. But karma got her back and she slowly died from Alzheimer's that took about ten years, before she finally succumbed.
@@humble.pie.if you're genuinely asking, Sam Varkin, a diagnosed narcissist and psychology professor, explains in detail the connection between emotional incest and narcissism in this video "Emotional Covert Incest is Lifelong: Birth of Shared Fantasy" ua-cam.com/video/ygtUc3B55Us/v-deo.html
Sidenote: Omg, the girl in the car randomly saying why are you parking next to me, its a big lot: I be feeling the EXACT same way. All these spaces in this big ass parking lot and you gotta park next to me, who purposely parked where I did to NOT be next to another car😒 😂😂
When i left my ex husband after 10 years, his mom started coming over to the house to do his laundry, make him meals and help take care of my kids when it was his turn. I wasnt shocked. Within 6 months he met a newly immigrated woman online and moved her into the house. Literal man-child that cant do anything alone or for himself.
stop treating these ninjas like gods , stop talking so much, stop being desperate, and stop acting like a blonde, make him WORK and prove himself, stop dating EX cons and ninjas on parole, NEVER let them move in your home, or drive your car and ladies, never co-sign for these ninjas, never let them isolate you from you support system (family/friends) ...and never take them serious date, and keep it moving !!
I feel like this also happ with sisters sometimes. The emotional incest is strong, I see it with my mom's family. All he sisters (who had distant husbands or were abusive or alcoholics) ADORE their brothers but not their sisters. My mom has a healthy marriage and she doesn't act that way... Just a thought
I already see a problem with the way two of my sisters are raising their boys. They tell them that they can’t love anyone else but them (mother). I told them they’re wrong for that. And I’ve asked them what about their daughters? No answer 😑 I mostly blame the mothers, they need to cut the umbilical cord early on, and raise their sons to be independent people.
Im so sock of the single mother hate. Don't you know how many mothers are this way woth their sons regardless if shes single. Plenty of married moms are toxic
They are the PRIMARY ones with these issues. The men I have dated who were raised by single mothers were actually BETTER than the dudes from a 2 parent household. 😅
@@lovelyloner what you say makes sense because, while it can happen in both, I also see it alot with mothers that are actually partnered when they have a husband who is chronically absent emotionally, physically, mentally, in the home/relationship - i.e., married single moms. But when I think about, it maybe it's 2 types? (1) the types where the mothers infantalize their sons and breed the weaponized incompetent man-children. These moms tell you how you'll never be good enough for their precious baby boy, or take care of him like _sheee_ does 🙄🙄🙄 Or (2) they adultify their sons via emotional incest and create unhealthy dynamics and competition because _they_ want to be the woman in his life - they are the ones who've groomed their sons to take care of them and essentially drop everything they're doing to take care of mommy dearest - he'll always concede to her and have terrible boundaries with her because she's raised him to feel guilty about not meeting her needs, since he was the "only man she can rely on."
married doesn’t mean they aren’t single. there are plenty of married mothers who are not getting what they feel they need from their partner, so they look for it in their sons
@@naediggs4816 Completely agree. I watched my stepmom treat my brother this way. A lot of these males watched their sisters go through hell and have zero empathy. Their mamas will always be there so what do they need a woman for besides shex. My brother is ran through, been to jail multiple times, assaulted his mother and still lives at home at 27. He genuinely believes he’s the prize, but can’t function as an adult.
@@lovelylonerI think modern demands from career and life in general have made men tired, lazy and selfish. Society in general and family in particular r also to blame. Society has changed so much over the years. People have become lying non adjusting misfits. So many women have given up perfectly good marriages cos they couldn't adjust and take up the challenges of married life. When they came back and became financially dependent on their brothers, society started thinking that all marriages that breakup have such women behind them. Men become exhausted and fed up of caring for and being pulled by their mothers, sisters wives and daughters.
I was with the guy at the beginning, up until he started in about 'single mothers'. Sighhhhhhhh... Some of the most toxic men I've ever met had married mothers, or mothers with live-in lovers, or domestic partners, etc etc. Ugh. Single motherhood is not the problem regarding 'momma's boys'. Unresolved/unexamined emotional trauma accumulated throughout a woman's life under patriarchal capitalism, and then carried forward and inflicted upon her children, THAT is the primary problem at play here. She gets to mold a man, from birth, to value her, to prioritize her, because no other man in her life has done so; not her father, not her boyfriends, or her spouse, and certainly not her extended male relations; she's always been expected to give to and support everyone ELSE in her family, because that's what girls and women are FOR, according to the social norms she's been conditioned to uphold. Now that she has her own little man, who she has authority over as his parent, she can 'fix' that wound in her psyche. THAT is the problem here. Some mothers are out here doing THAT, to their sons, and many of them don't even know that they're doing it, let alone why.
Excellent video. This is who I dated. His Mom still did his laundry at age 28, he never left home and spent every night paragliding or riding around in the scooter, no chores. Then as soon as he’d fly to see me all he did is answer to his Mom and message her. 😑 I’m very glad I’m out of it.
So true about momma's boy. Even when she died, his sisters replaced her. So much emotional trauma and family conflict. I wish I would have walked away 20 yrs ago
Omg. I’ve dated this guy before whom he thinks that my role in the relationship is to serve him in every way. I feel like I am not a partner but his personal maid hahaha. Then I found out I was actually dating a mama’s boy. Goodness 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
Once heard a story of this guy who was "perfect" in every way and hated vegetables. Girlfriend never met his fam until she demanded to coz he proposed. She meets them,they have dinner,mother puts veggies on son's plate,he throws a fit,when they all done eating,mommy picks up a fork,and does the "choo-choo train"..open up here comes the train" feeding him the veggies. And in the car,he tells her thats the ONLY way she will ever get him to eat veggies😂
This is why one main requirement I had when I was dating was: lives in his own house, handling the finances himself, and does his own cooking, cleaning and laundry, OR if he lives with parents (because this is the UK and it's happening more and more that people live with their families to save for a house), he pays bills in the house/contributes to the household, and does his own cooking, cleaning, laundry. I refuse to get with someeone that can't do this for themselves. Even if they don't do it all the time, I at least need to know that they are able! (Because I am)
Me and my boyfriend were in the dating phase had only known each other for a few months and not yet offical. His mom and dad came to visit him on Valentines day. I was suspicious but i honestly thought he was using that as an excuse not to see me until the day after we all went out to lunch. I was blinded by the excitement he was ready for me to meet his parents. Lol never again
I've had some exes that are 100% an ex for a reason. They f'd up at their "free trials" (as she said and I'm not stealing for myself). However, that said, I'm so glad none of them had these mommy issues. I feel like I dodge some kind of bullet.
This is something that women need to ask on the first date along with a whole list of questions. I can’t date a momma boy because she would get her mouth cracked along with his. 😂😂I have no patience.
Better you should observe what he DOES, rather than relying on what he SAYS. Asking questions just reveals to him what buttons he needs to press to turn you into his puppet.Observe-observe-observe!
I have a Pakistani friend who is going through this right now with her husband. Having an emotionally incestuous relationship with his sister while treating her (wife0 like an afterthought. This is how patriarchy harms society: by pushing women into a "single" role and allowing them nothing more. OF COURSE the women are going to cling as hard as they can to that "role", even when it becomes "inappropriate"- because it is the ONLY one they are allowed! What other option do they have?
The Ancient Greek language has different words for different types of love. Agape is selfless love, Philo is the love for friends, Storgate is the love for family and Eros is the love for a romantic partner! Thanks for posting this!
Oooh what you said about the family.. I realized my family, led by my mom, was being like that with my lady and we GTFO. I stopped talking to her over it. I called my mom all the time before that.. Often mutiple times a day. But saw her clearly when she disrespected my partner and realized she didnt respect or accept me either.
Exactly, especially women who teach their kids not to spend on women and to hold back. Always ib their skns business, doing everything for them so they dont have a sense of being responsible etc.
Imagine being with someone who has mommy issues and so do you. I WISH I had this info 10 years ago. Would’ve changed my life as a woman. I didn’t realize until I was an adult that I was groomed to be a replacement spouse. So, no one did everything for me, I had to do a lot more than I should have as a minor. So, I put up with a lot more than I should have because I didn’t fully recognize what his mother was doing since mine was toxic in her own way. I’m embarrassed by how much time I wasted, but I’m glad I figured it out in my early 30s versus 50s and 60s.
I'm more interested in what type of mother creates an abusive male Is it the mama's boy mom? or is it the violent abusive mother? Which one of these moms creates an abusive violent predator who is dangerous to women?
It could be all or it could be none. An abusive person may be predisposed to certain behaviors because of what they saw or experienced growing up. However at the end of the day, it's a choice and (potentially) some undiagnosed mental illness or personality disorder that's often found in a person who's abusive. But I think it's a choice that person made to behave in that manner.
I think that either could produce a toxic abuser, but in some cases a man raised by a mother like that can turn out to be a decent man after all. I think toxic mama's boy moms tend to produce men who are eternally dependent on their moms, who don't take responsibility because they have been shielded from it their entire lives, who can't cook or clean and expect their wives/gf's to do all that for them, who seek women with low self-esteems that are willing to settle for a manbaby who never prioritizes her, who are very easily manipulated and influenced by his mom's opinions and who will never be reliable husbands because they're willing to drop their wives for whatever dumbass reason their mom gives. These types of men can also be violent but not all of them necessarily are. They're still super toxic and horrible partners. I think that a man raised by an abusive, violent mom is more likely to become violent himself. He has been taught that violence is acceptable. The same effect is produced by a man raised by a violent father. These types of men are usually horrible at regulating their emotions, especially if they were shamed for showing emotion when they were kids. They have trauma and since men rarely seek mental health help, they probably haven't learned to cope with it and can be unpredictable, paranoid, distrusting, prone to anger, and reluctant to open up emotionally. They're also more likely to suffer from substance abuse issues, like many people with trauma do. He may also have a sour opinion of women because he might project his mom's actions onto other women. Of course this is not always the case, similar childhoods can produce very different people. But these are just some patterns I've recognized as I've met and interacted with men who have these types of childhoods.
I want to say it’s really neither of those in most cases. If you’re asking about an abusive male’s origins it boils down more to them witnessing abuse OF their mom or female relative by their dad or male relative and whether or not they empathize with their mother. Victims of direct abuse are more prone to be empathetic to abuse victims and people who share similar characteristics like gender, and witnesses to domestic abuse who empathize with their mom don’t develop mentalities of entitlement, misogyny, and objectify her and other women. It’s the boys and men who don’t empathize with women, or learn not to, who develop those mentalities and become abusive. Do abusive mothers exist? Absolutely. But if abusive mothers lead to abusive males, there’d be strong evidence to corroborate it. Also that would in turn make those men fearful and cautious of women, which isn’t really the case. Men will say they were abused in their childhood to justify their abuse of people, but there are plenty of men, women and nonbinary people who grow up NOT being abusive from similar and worst backgrounds. Abusive men know they can get a lot of mileage from claiming they’re also a victim, as long as we see their excuse as a justification to BE abusive. Plus, they get the added benefit of blaming a woman for their abuse of women. Studies by counselors such as Lundy Bancroft can bring more subjects like this into light. But to answer your question, the most common kind of ‘mother’ that is prone to raise an abusive male isn’t the one that coddles her son to death or is violent toward him. It’s the one that was the recipient of violence and abuse, to which the son doesn’t develop empathy for and adopts his father’s beliefs of her being an object, a utilitarian role to fulfill. And it’s definitely more likely to happen if she stays with his abusive father, because then the son learns that this dynamic ‘should’ be an ‘acceptable’, ‘loving’ relationship.
The single one who punishes him in anger. Try paying attention to that. I'm pretty sure that's a huge reason. Or the one who never punishes.(doesn't matter if single single or not) The one in between is the healthy middle 😅😅😅
people need to understand that we don't just stay with mamma boys.... we're coerced & manipulated. we have to keep spreading the word & support one another by arming ourselves with the knowledge necessary in order to completely swerve this situation INSTEAD of bashing/hating on/belittling women that were tricked... idk how it makes sense to kick people while they're down, but it's not giving whatever you think it's giving 🤮💔
Women need to be made AWARE of these issues and there needs to be a LIST of behaviours that women need to look out for. Also, decentering men makes it EASIER to see them and their bullshit clearly and allows women to not be "dazzled" by the fact of relationship! When a woman's freedom and peace of mind becomes the priority, then they are LESS likely to be trapped in a toxic relationship, because they will get out while you still can! This is a benefit of the Internet: that women can exchange information and share their experiences with other women, so we can all LEARN to AVOID toxic men and being'trapped"!
I had a mother call me a gold digger ( he wasnt even rich but very abusive) i refused to want him back. He proposed and i said no. Then SHE was insulted i didnt want him. Shes crazy.
OMG! Wrapping your legs around a man, or young male teen, is something that a girlfriend/wife does, not the mother of this male person. I have heard stories where a mother will keep her toddler son in her bed long past the time when he should be sleeping in his own bed, which is probably how this mama’s boy behavior gets started. These types of women seem to have an emotional void which even a boyfriend or husband can’t fill and their sons pay the price😢
It's pretty obvious what's she's after; if they aren't already having sex, they will be, sooner or later. She's already OPENLY "inappropriate" with him; the likelihood that this isn't going to escalate into incest at some point is SMALL.
It's real real BIG on Pornhub, apparently: incest porn. That is going to have repercussions on society, mark my words: making sex with children and relatives "acceptable" in men's eyes. Because that's the effect it will have on them. They will be looking at their daughters and sisters with lustful eyes because in their minds it has been "normalized" by the porn they watch..
Yup. A friend is a 54 year old virgin. He makes great money and between the sister and mother he might stay single forever. The stay by his places. When will he find a wife?
MY MOTHER NEVER WANTED DAUGHTERS. THEY TOLD HER I WAS A BOY. I CAME OUT A GIRL AND SHE HATED ME FOR IT. RIGHT AFTER ME SHE HAD CHRIS , THE GOLDEN CHILD. HER ONLY BOY. I LOVE HIM BUT HE IS ARROGANT, ENTITLED AND MESSY AF (CLEANS NOTHING). I WAS ABUSED AND TREATED LIKE THE MAID. MY MOTHER HAS ACTED JEALOUS OF CHRIS GIRLFRIENDS AND SAY THINGS LIKE YOUR MAMA IS ALWAYS GONNA BE YOUR NUMBER 1. I CUT HER OUT MY LIFE 3 YEARS AGO I CUT HER OUT MY LIFE. LAST YEAR MY BROTHER AND HIS FIANCE GOT RESTRAINING ORDERS ON MY CRAZY ASS MOTHER smh
Now you are FREE. People don;t seem to appreciate how FREE they are when parents have ignored them all their childhood. Being "free" of family is actually a GIFT: you can live your life any way you please, and can learn what benefits emotional independence and freedom from family pressures can bring!
A Mama's boy stole two years of my time. Incompetent. We were in university together so I had some hope. He was studying electrical engineering - He HAD to be smart, right? No. He didn't consider that he'd have to program, then dropped out. I helped him find a job, which he chose the night shift. I told him he'd hate it. He didn't listen, did it anyway, hated it and quit. This manchild then continued to play RDR2 not contributing financially at all for the next two or three months. He would complain when he'd be asked to use the riding lawn mower every two weeks despite not paying food or rent. Eventually he ended it saying I deserved better. He was right. But guess who came crawling back? And guess who told him he wasn't a good friend, let alone a good partner, and kicked him out of her life. Girls, don't assume he's smart just because of a degree program or a job or any of that other nonsense. Does he pick up the slack when you struggle, yes or no? If it's a no, move on. You'd do it for someone else so you deserve someone who would do it for you.
I’m so sorry, but exactly how old do you have to be before you stop blaming your mommy for your failed relationships? Father’s behave this way as well. They also create other issues more characterized with toxic father behaviors. At some point it’s up to you to do the work and set the boundaries.
The Mama's boy issue is created by you women, it's you to solve it. By the time someone is grown up it's difficult to unlearn those mistakes. So I encourage you to raise your kids to not be Mamas boys
Lots of fathers are responsible for turning their daughters into entitled princesses who think all men should treat them like their fathers do: no accountability; just take-take-take, while throwing temper tantrums when they don't get what they want, and playing cutesy "head games" like a toddler.
I have all sons and they are definitely Mamas Boys.😊 It's not hard for me to hear any of this. I raise my sons to be husbands and to treat his wife well. I am excited when they meet a girl that I actually like. But, if he chooses someone I don't like, he will know it. She will know it. He is my child and I want the best for my sons. Fathers are the same way with their daughters. We don't talk nearly as much about Daddy's girls.🙄 Bc everyone LOVES to bash Single Mothers then women in general because we live in a male worshipping society aka patriarchal society. Single mothers, don't feel bad if you're close to your sons.🥰🥰But, of course, be just as close to your daughter, if you have any daughters.🥰🥰 I would treat my children the same way, no matter their gender.🤷🏾♀️ Overprotective of both. I am this way with all the children in my family and my entire family.🤷🏾♀️🥰🥰❤ My son did say that he would tell his girlfriend/wife that I come first to him always and I quickly corrected him and told him NOT to do that because I do plan for all my sons to MARRY WELL and leave my house so I can live my life once they are all adults.😊 Another note that none of you Childfree ladies talk about is that a lot of you are Highly problematic and AREN'T being raised to be wives. 🙄😑I'll make a video about it. You will probably be offended bc most ppl are offended when ppl are critiquing them, especially CONSTANTLY. My sons aren't dating/marrying a mess. I will never be their friend. I am their Mother. Their One and Only mother and they will bring their women home to meet me and I will approve/disapprove accordingly. And, yes, most people date their mother or father. So, you will be compared to their opposite gender parent. Something else ppl will have to deal with when families are close.🤷🏾♀️ If I like a girl/woman then I fully support that relationship and really don't interfere. If I don't like her because she's a weed head who cheats on my child, mistreats my child, hits my child, can't cook, isn't clean, I won't like her, will be dismissive of her and my son will most likely cut her loose bc at the end of the day, blood is thicker than water and parents, especially the Mother who gave your boyfriend/fiance/husband life will come first because we love your bf/fiance/hubby and were there first, during and always. Mothers and Fathers of your significant other will play a large role in who the boy/man chooses and who their daughter chooses because WE LOVE THEM and rightfully are protective of them. Single mothers, don't change that. Ever Its like an abuser trying to shame you into abandoning your child so they can mistreat them and abuse them. Nope. Not on my watch. Sorry. Not sorry.
With all due respect ma'am you are talking too much considering you really have absolutely no control over who your children will end up with and because of your 'know it all' attitude I have a strong feeling that your sons are going to greatly disappoint you😂
I'm confused. You say that you will always come first because you gave your son life, but then earlier you said that your son had told you that he was going to tell his future wife that you come first to him and you told him to not say that. Why? If you believe that you should be first priority to your sons over his possible future wife/kids, why should he have to lie about it or hide it?
@lauraanderson8785 I come first because I am The Mother. My sons first true love is for his mother. Just as a girl's first true love is for her father. My sons ONLY bring women home if they know she is someone who he is serious about and who he KNOWS I will approve of. My opinion of you matters before we even meet. I believe all parents are like this with their children which is why most people are nervous to meet the parents. If I like you and you treat my son well, I won't interfere because I have my own life. But, Single mothers and/or fathers of these children will be there before the new girl, during and after that girl leaves. People hop on the Internet and just say anything and I'm here to let you Ladies know what it really is irl. I'm not changing for the Internet. This is my family and my real life and I don't play about my children. I never have and won't start now. The answer to the second part of your question is IF I approve of the woman my son is dating/marrying, I won't need to interfere. I raise my sons to be GOOD husbands so, no, I don't plan to come before his wife. But, we are all lying to ourselves if any of you think that sons won't talk to their mother about their girlfriends/wives. I'm the Matriarch of my family so I will have some input and will offer guidance because that is still my child and I am Elder in our family. But, I don't want any of my sons to put me above his wife. However, most children will hold their parents in high regard, as they should because we are their parents. And my sons know they will have to take care of me as I age. His wife will have to be Ok with that too. My advice to women is to be respectful of the mother and father of your boyfriend/fiance/husband. You'll have a better experience overall. I was married before and I consider my in-laws to be another set of parents. I am divorced but they are still like my parents. I RESPECT them and listen to them like I would my own parents. I am BIG on RESPECT. If a woman doesn't respect me, I know my sons won't tolerate it and I won't either.
@omphilemoerane2569 You sound stupid and childfree. People always say this but then ask where the parents are when kids are bad. We either have control or don't. And you're blabbing alot to not know my sons or me. I have raised 1 son into adulthood. And second just got his driver's license and will be an adult next year. I have 3 younger sons. What's your qualifications? I have heard what you said before but it's funny because everything I want my sons to do, they do it. They know Mama Knows Best and I'm ALWAYS looking out for THEIR best interest. I'm sharing this with you to prepare you so YOU all know that Single Mothers don't owe you anything. You all are trying to date/marry OUR CHILDREN, not the other way around. You have NOTHING I want or need. Being RESPECTFUL to the Woman who raised your boyfriend/fiance/husband ALONE would be BEST for you.
@libiaamares Fathers approve who their daughters date. There's cultures that still arrange marriages. Imagine that! So, yea, I do still plan to help my sons choose the best wife for him because that is going to be my daughters-in-law and the mothers of our grandchildren. People are so delusional if they think parents won't have any say in who their kids bring home. There's much older adults still dating badly and choosing undesirable partners. We are building generational wealth over here so nothing is done willy nilly with us. You sound like you're afraid you won't make the cut. That's more of a YOU problem. Not an US problem.😊 And I guess there's some jealousy for some folks because no one cares to help you pick better partners. It's sad that that is your life. You'll have to learn by experience and that could be very damaging and dangerous.
There is a viral video of a woman sharing her pregnancy story. Her mother-in-law wanted to see her giving birth with her husband 🤢 and the daughter-in-law obviously said no. But her husband enabled his mothers predatory behavior and let in. His mother recorded her giving birth and posted it on family group chat. This is the most disguisting story i have ever heard in a while, where a older woman do not understand privacy and pain of other woman and sabotage her most vulnarable moment. If i was her, i would've kicked the useless mommy issue husband and his mother out of the hospital 😂
Disgustingly sad that boundaries were disrespected for the pregnant lady. The mother in law's interference will continue into the grandchild's life.
they post whole vajayjay pics on social media with the baby's head crowning, like it's no big deal!
@@patty-pat-patthat is a sex crime. MIL needs to go to prison.
That is horrible. Hope she left that man baby
How is wanting that predatory? I wouldn't mind my boyfriend's mother being there for my delivery because she's a doctor, plus my mom lives in a different state. But recording it is very strange... weird behavior
Oh oh these types of moms are going to have a hard time hearing the truth about themselves. This is what happens when you continuously give birth for reasons that are selfish and unhealthy, but then turn around and call child-free by choice women selfish 🙄
Nowadays, you definitely have to be selfish to some degree to have children. Everyone is selfish and everyone will try to justify their choice to act like they aren't selfish.🤷🏾♀️
1. He cant cook, do laundry or clean but his a full grown adult, cause his mom did and still does that for him 🚩🚩🚩
My aunt did this with her son, and emotionally neglected her daughter. Now that son is 24 years old, has never held a job, eating all of her groceries, and stealing valuables for weed money. Even though her daughter had some bumps starting out, she now has her own daughter, works as a dental assistant, and is back in school to become a dental hygienist. Whenever I see these emotionally incestuous relationships, I only feel pity for the son, and the next woman they leech on to who they expect to be their surrogate mother 🥴
Exactly!
It's true that toxic mothers can produce toxic sons. 😢
Ditto toxic fathers. men are not as exempt from blame as they like to think they are. If they are the "leaders" that we women are supposed to kowtow to, they are making a piss-poor showing on every level.
"After the free trial was up, then everything started happening" I vote we start calling the time period before the switch up, the free trial period. Because that is a perfect description of it. Once this people think they have you locked down in a difficult to cancel membership, suddenly the hidden fees and penalties show up.
Some of the most fantastic men I have been with were big time providers. They were not afraid to take care of me: whether it be giving flowers, bringing me coffee in the morning or even bringing medicine when I didn't feel well. This dynamic was completely flipped for the guys with Mommy Issues. You spot it a mile away. No grand gestures, no nice dates, no words of affirmation or really any signals that they will treat you well in the relationship. They expect YOU to do everything for them. RUN!
Agreed. Nothing is ever about you, it’s always about them. They are always very, very cheap and needy!
Mine doesn't have mommy issues because she died when he was very young and he still got those same "treating women like that" issues😂it's literally the trenches out here
I really used to believe that men raised by single mothers were more inclined to respect and appreciate women. Boy, was it a shock to find out that NO, the reality is they grow up in their feminine energy expecting women's LABOR to be free and unconditionally available to them. Sorry for all the boys born to deadbeat dads out there, as their circumstances are not their fault, but those men are disqualified from the dating pool!
There's also the reverse where the man hates his mother. Those guys are super dangerous.
They secretly hate their mothers the closer they are because they desperately want to individuate and can’t free himself. Mommas boys are abusive!
We need a video about that
OH BABY THOSE ARE TRULY THE WORSE ! those are the ones who blame their mothers for the fathers not being around and they will never respect women! They think all women should pay for their entire existence! Those are your cheaters ! Those are the ones who’s around and do the main chick / side chick thing !!!
AGREED. A mature person has a mature relationship with their parents. That means if you and your parents don’t get along you cut them off or keep a distant but cordial relationship with them. An adult being all, “I HATE YOU MOMMY” ain’t a good or grown up look.
My dad was a mama's boy. He told my mom flat out i will always choose her. I was also dragged into it as well. She was very mean to me and my brother, Like abuse level mean. One time i vividly remember crying to my dad to help us and he said shes my mom i can't. We ate a peice of food she wanted and made us sit at the table for over 5 hours. To this day almost 20 years later i still ask if i can eat or get something to drink in my own house. Its almost like a reflex at this point.
Never related to 'grandmas' being kind troupe. They are homewreckers!
Someone needs to cover the men with daddy issues. I've seen stuff about women with daddy issues, women with mommy issues, men with mommy issues, but not men with daddy issues.
The fathers that abandon them and don't raise them.
I am Moroccan and in my culture it's the standard that men are married to their mother and wives are a evil necessity to have grandchildren. The wife is always second best and easily disposable. The children too which causes the next generation of Mother emashed men.
Absent fathers, overbearing and emotional neglected mothers.
The World Cup gave a good glimpse of that.
I know this sick culture isn't unique to Morocco but I speak of my own people because I wan them to do better.
This is the norm for northern Nigeria too. You gonna have to be married to him/mum😅
Go for a man whose mom passed away
@@l-kin3480 Great! Then you have to compete with a SAINT🙄
@@sparklemotion8377😂😂 but seriously it's so fked up.. I'm from India and its very similar circumstances here..
@@sparklemotion8377 😂😂😂 I can imagine the 'My mother used to..'
Here’s an insider scoop ladies. If his mom lives in his house, he will treat her like his wife, and any girlfriend like a concubine. If they’re “taking care of their mother” they are not available. Effectively in a relationship with mom.
I push my son to have a gf and wife cus I want him to be happy. It’s sick af for women that don’t want happiness for their sons
Emotional Incest:
1. "also called covert incest, describes an unhealthy family dynamic where a parent relies on their child for emotional and practical advice and support.
Despite the name, it doesn’t involve physical sexual abuse: “Incest” refers to inappropriate emotional closeness."
2. "a form of emotional abuse where a parent or primary caregiver treats their child like a romantic partner, relying on them for the emotional support a partner would typically provide."
EDIT: commented before watching the full vid, but imma leave these up anyways. But it's unfortunate because, while I understand what the women are doing is wrong and abusive, I also understand that the women are using their sons because they are not in suitable partnerships (either b/c physically single or married single moms). It's a choice and these women are responsible, but I think it's something to consider.
EDIT: Commented before finishing the videos cause I got big triggered LOL but imma leave this comment up anyways.
Also, when I think about it, I believe there's at least 2 types of outcomes in these dynamics, with the possibility of a combo effect:
(1) the types where the mothers infantalize their sons and breed the weaponized incompetent man-children. These moms tell you how you'll *_never_* be good enough for their precious baby boy, or take care of him like _sheee_ does 🙄🙄🙄. These men will expect you to act like a slave cause their moms did everything for them, and the mothers will encourage the idea of your inherent inferiority to these men.
Or (2) they adultify their sons via emotional incest and create unhealthy dynamics and competition because _they_ want to be the woman in his life - they are the ones who've groomed their sons to take care of them and essentially drop everything they're doing to take care of mommy dearest - he'll always concede to her and have terrible boundaries with her because she's raised him to feel guilty about not meeting her needs, since he was the "only man she can rely on."
These men are emotionally unavailable because their mothers occupy the intimate partner space and cannot give it over to you. You'll always be put last in this relationship, and he will allow her to violate and disrespect your boundaries again and again - and she will, because she has none and she destroyed her son's optimum opportunities to ever develop his own.
Emotional incest is so much more than that… it’s so much worse, and it’s ALWAYS an extremely painful, violating, and development-stunting type of abuse. The emotional incest that these men are in must be to a much smaller degree than what most people who experience it go through.
🎯
I wish i could have seen your videos 10 years ago. How many of us blame ourselves for YEARS trying to live a fantasy and nobody notices that we are in an unhealthy relationship that is like a dark hopeless pit and we don't know any better, because this is somehow normal, because there's just not enough discussion about this. I hope this content reaches everyone out there and i hope the algorithm recommends it to all the momma's boys too and that they will feel personally attacked
Girl, I used to read so many books on how to improve myself as a woman and a wife!!! Years I worked on myself! We were always working on improving me, never him, bc he was perfect and fantastic ofcourse!
I learnt a lot of this in therapy 💗 it was the best decision of my life to get educated on family dynamics and healthy relationships
Let's also talk about men with daddy issues his need for validation from his father brought our 13 year marriage to an end.
Pretty sure my ex has mommy and daddy issues, lol
Definitely be on the lookout for the other side of the spectrum of men that hate and/or have a negative viewpoint on their mom without proper reason.
Men that have a vested interest in being hostile/disrespectful to their mother that’s shown to be rooted in misogyny rather than based on her individual actions are red flags. Because they also look for ‘mommy’ in women, but instead of another mom to replace her with, they’re looking for a woman like their mom to punish her.
It took a long time to realize one of my ex’s resentment toward his mother wasn’t because she ‘broke up the family’ with divorce as he claimed. It was because she refused to continue to jeopardize her and her kids livelihoods and safety, and then ended up thriving with a business completely on her own while the dad still robbed Paul to pay Peter and had any endeavors he tried to scam his kids into fail.
Myself being a successful, self sufficient woman who met my bum ex yrs ago didn’t understand the constant accusations of me being ‘selfish’ and overall disrespect while supporting him in all the ways someone can support their partner. Even when he put us in a bind (in hindsight, on purpose), I couldn’t figure out why this man got angry that his shortcomings didn’t affect me.
Until one day it clicked that it wasn’t me he was angry and bitter at, but rather whose role I was given to reenact so he can have a different, preferred outcome.
I dated one for 8yrs. Worst 8yrs of my life…
My ex mother was the absolute worst everything she did or said was right and everything I did or said was wrong these mamas boys in my experience are the absolute worst
Listen to these wise words,,,I'm 57 years old, and have a 56 year old mama's boy for a boyfriend. HIs 83 year old mother lives in the in law suite, and it is absolute hell, no joke. Run like the wind and never look back. I'm trying to get out
Hope you get out soon sis.
Tf
My half brother is a son-husband. He is very toxic and mean and my mother enables his behaviour. He cant form a bond with anyone except his mother. My mother is toxic as well and she has borderline and narcistic tendencies and my brother took her behaviour over. He will be 31 soon and he is embarrased to be around men his age, because my brother still lives with his mother and does not plan to leave soon. I always feel anxiety being aroung them and they really love to gossip about others... and they also like to bully me and slander my name in the house. But at this point I am rather hated by my family, then cuddled into an emotionally retarded stunted adult-child
Uh yeah, I was in such a relationship for almost 7 years. It was a living hell....
She and her sister are both holding on extremly onto their sons and sabotage every relationship they get in.
It was like having a relationship with him and her as he had to go to her for everything, he never had his own opinion, couldn't argue or discuss without going to her first.
He couldn't do anything, completely helpless without her as she never raised him to be a grown, self-sufficient and life skilled adult.
She held him in a constant depending on her teenage status and I had to pay more, managed all the finances, contracts, household, emotional labor, etc all while having a job, and going to study school every Saturday and Sunday, it was so draining
After the break up the only thing I felt was relief! I was just glad to be out of it and never ever have to deal with her or him again.
Since that day 5.5 years ago I'm single, childfree, celibate and not interested in dating 🙂
That's so pathetic, like she can't support herself?
@@NightinGal89 no, she could support herself fine! But she never raised him that he could exist without her support.
Guess she wanted to be needed all the time and liked the attention she got through this.
I'm with you! After 5 years, I also still have no desire to date anyone new.
Same not dating and iam without kids and I don't see my self dating again
Toxic siblings may also hinder relationships :)
I learned my ex and his mom both had that dependent thing. He actually acts he’s her man. He took bring the man of the house to another level where it’s toxic and unhealthy and thinks he can do it to everyone. She never established a boundary. Then gets upset when he crosses a line like he’s her father. Every excuse in the book for both. I learn to never to be around anyone like that.
Codependency toxic family dynamic
I'm a black woman. My white ex-fiancé was emotionally enmeshed with his mommy. The father was neglectful and psychologically and verbally abusive. My ex, while still a child, advised his mom to leave his dad. She did and they divorced. She adultified him, having her safekeep all her money in his bank account and telling him since childhood that women would only want him for his money. She was nice to me until we became engaged and then she began interfering in our relationship in every way she could. He did nothing, not challenging her as she attacked me to my face and behind my back to him, their family and people I didn't know in the unfamiliar town I'd just moved to days earlier. He simply whined and felt sorry for himself. I left him and want nothing to do with him. Years later, he's texting me for another chance. I'd sooner chew off my arm.
My ex’s mother was exactly like this. She was like a stalker. Constantly calling, making up stories, begging him to come help her, and calling me trying to influence our big move out of the city. She went nuts at 73 years old like a child. He would text her these huge messages of love and adoration and then tell me how much he can’t stand her. Well guess what? He chronically cheated on me and told me he needed someone who could get along with his mom. Both were the fakest people I’ve ever met in my life. He’s now with a mini version of his bat-shit crazy ass mom. Good riddance.
@@missminti my ex-fiancé's mother had mental health problems, also. It was a free pass to curse me out and verbally abuse without provocation. He ordered me to ignore it.
I used to think that a man loving and looking after his mother was a sign that he respects women and would do the same for his wife. Now I see it as a red flag. Men are apparently unable to give that energy (can't call it love) to more than one woman at a time. I'm a daddy's girl and never had that struggle and would never tolerate my father acting like a jealous boyfriend.
Used to be a TV show I think on ABC channel called, “Mama’s boys” y’all need to take a look at that.
My dad was a momma's boy, my grandma w 5:55 as narcissistic and had an emotionally incestous relationship with her kids. Needless to say, my mom suffered a lot and when she divorced, she started glowing.
10 years of pure hell with a man that was a mama's boy. She recklessly contributed to personally breaking up four marriages because she had three sons, two of which were mama's boys. The first son was married and divorced and then married me and divorced and was engaged and then THAT woman broke it off after spending time with this mother. The second son married and divorced, this one was interesting because the son's wife was visiting her sister in TX and turned around and got a job in TX and asked the husband to join her and he went to live with his mom, instead of going to his wife and children who was trying to escape the mom. Then the last son got married and divorced. Got married again and ALMOST divorced but they moved to AZ to escape her. All the daughter in laws including myself were having a discussion one day and we all agreed that if given the chance, she would have slept with all three of her sons. But karma got her back and she slowly died from Alzheimer's that took about ten years, before she finally succumbed.
yup that mommy poisioning is what breeds narcissists. Narcs are usually just big mamas boys
No they're not. Wtf. How did you even come up with this conclusion?
Bingo
@@humble.pie.if you're genuinely asking, Sam Varkin, a diagnosed narcissist and psychology professor, explains in detail the connection between emotional incest and narcissism in this video "Emotional Covert Incest is Lifelong: Birth of Shared Fantasy"
ua-cam.com/video/ygtUc3B55Us/v-deo.html
So many women need to hear this advice.
Sidenote: Omg, the girl in the car randomly saying why are you parking next to me, its a big lot: I be feeling the EXACT same way. All these spaces in this big ass parking lot and you gotta park next to me, who purposely parked where I did to NOT be next to another car😒 😂😂
When i left my ex husband after 10 years, his mom started coming over to the house to do his laundry, make him meals and help take care of my kids when it was his turn. I wasnt shocked. Within 6 months he met a newly immigrated woman online and moved her into the house. Literal man-child that cant do anything alone or for himself.
SMH
stop treating these ninjas like gods , stop talking so much, stop being desperate, and stop acting like a blonde, make him WORK and prove himself, stop dating EX cons and ninjas on parole, NEVER let them move in your home, or drive your car and ladies, never co-sign for these ninjas, never let them isolate you from you support system (family/friends) ...and never take them serious date, and keep it moving !!
I feel like this also happ with sisters sometimes. The emotional incest is strong, I see it with my mom's family. All he sisters (who had distant husbands or were abusive or alcoholics) ADORE their brothers but not their sisters. My mom has a healthy marriage and she doesn't act that way... Just a thought
I already see a problem with the way two of my sisters are raising their boys. They tell them that they can’t love anyone else but them (mother). I told them they’re wrong for that. And I’ve asked them what about their daughters? No answer 😑
I mostly blame the mothers, they need to cut the umbilical cord early on, and raise their sons to be independent people.
Im so sock of the single mother hate. Don't you know how many mothers are this way woth their sons regardless if shes single. Plenty of married moms are toxic
They are the PRIMARY ones with these issues. The men I have dated who were raised by single mothers were actually BETTER than the dudes from a 2 parent household. 😅
@@lovelyloner what you say makes sense because, while it can happen in both, I also see it alot with mothers that are actually partnered when they have a husband who is chronically absent emotionally, physically, mentally, in the home/relationship - i.e., married single moms. But when I think about, it maybe it's 2 types?
(1) the types where the mothers infantalize their sons and breed the weaponized incompetent man-children. These moms tell you how you'll never be good enough for their precious baby boy, or take care of him like _sheee_ does 🙄🙄🙄
Or (2) they adultify their sons via emotional incest and create unhealthy dynamics and competition because _they_ want to be the woman in his life - they are the ones who've groomed their sons to take care of them and essentially drop everything they're doing to take care of mommy dearest - he'll always concede to her and have terrible boundaries with her because she's raised him to feel guilty about not meeting her needs, since he was the "only man she can rely on."
married doesn’t mean they aren’t single. there are plenty of married mothers who are not getting what they feel they need from their partner, so they look for it in their sons
@@naediggs4816 Completely agree. I watched my stepmom treat my brother this way. A lot of these males watched their sisters go through hell and have zero empathy. Their mamas will always be there so what do they need a woman for besides shex. My brother is ran through, been to jail multiple times, assaulted his mother and still lives at home at 27. He genuinely believes he’s the prize, but can’t function as an adult.
@@lovelylonerI think modern demands from career and life in general have made men tired, lazy and selfish.
Society in general and family in particular r also to blame. Society has changed so much over the years. People have become lying non adjusting misfits. So many women have given up perfectly good marriages cos they couldn't adjust and take up the challenges of married life. When they came back and became financially dependent on their brothers, society started thinking that all marriages that breakup have such women behind them.
Men become exhausted and fed up of caring for and being pulled by their mothers, sisters wives and daughters.
I was with the guy at the beginning, up until he started in about 'single mothers'. Sighhhhhhhh...
Some of the most toxic men I've ever met had married mothers, or mothers with live-in lovers, or domestic partners, etc etc. Ugh.
Single motherhood is not the problem regarding 'momma's boys'. Unresolved/unexamined emotional trauma accumulated throughout a woman's life under patriarchal capitalism, and then carried forward and inflicted upon her children, THAT is the primary problem at play here.
She gets to mold a man, from birth, to value her, to prioritize her, because no other man in her life has done so; not her father, not her boyfriends, or her spouse, and certainly not her extended male relations; she's always been expected to give to and support everyone ELSE in her family, because that's what girls and women are FOR, according to the social norms she's been conditioned to uphold.
Now that she has her own little man, who she has authority over as his parent, she can 'fix' that wound in her psyche. THAT is the problem here. Some mothers are out here doing THAT, to their sons, and many of them don't even know that they're doing it, let alone why.
We'll put, thanks.
Great analysis!
Excellent video. This is who I dated. His Mom still did his laundry at age 28, he never left home and spent every night paragliding or riding around in the scooter, no chores.
Then as soon as he’d fly to see me all he did is answer to his Mom and message her. 😑
I’m very glad I’m out of it.
So true about momma's boy. Even when she died, his sisters replaced her. So much emotional trauma and family conflict. I wish I would have walked away 20 yrs ago
Moral of the videos i have been watching these days: No two humans r getting along these days.
Not the ones that are the subject of the videos or the ones making them 😂
Omg. I’ve dated this guy before whom he thinks that my role in the relationship is to serve him in every way. I feel like I am not a partner but his personal maid hahaha. Then I found out I was actually dating a mama’s boy. Goodness 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
Once heard a story of this guy who was "perfect" in every way and hated vegetables. Girlfriend never met his fam until she demanded to coz he proposed. She meets them,they have dinner,mother puts veggies on son's plate,he throws a fit,when they all done eating,mommy picks up a fork,and does the "choo-choo train"..open up here comes the train" feeding him the veggies. And in the car,he tells her thats the ONLY way she will ever get him to eat veggies😂
Gtfo 😂 wtf 😮
🤦♀️
This is why one main requirement I had when I was dating was: lives in his own house, handling the finances himself, and does his own cooking, cleaning and laundry, OR if he lives with parents (because this is the UK and it's happening more and more that people live with their families to save for a house), he pays bills in the house/contributes to the household, and does his own cooking, cleaning, laundry. I refuse to get with someeone that can't do this for themselves. Even if they don't do it all the time, I at least need to know that they are able! (Because I am)
Me and my boyfriend were in the dating phase had only known each other for a few months and not yet offical. His mom and dad came to visit him on Valentines day. I was suspicious but i honestly thought he was using that as an excuse not to see me until the day after we all went out to lunch. I was blinded by the excitement he was ready for me to meet his parents. Lol never again
I've had some exes that are 100% an ex for a reason. They f'd up at their "free trials" (as she said and I'm not stealing for myself). However, that said, I'm so glad none of them had these mommy issues. I feel like I dodge some kind of bullet.
Just found your channel and binging your content😂 Love it and you are gorgeous btw😊 Kind regards from Germany
Thank you so much!!
This is something that women need to ask on the first date along with a whole list of questions. I can’t date a momma boy because she would get her mouth cracked along with his. 😂😂I have no patience.
Better you should observe what he DOES, rather than relying on what he SAYS. Asking questions just reveals to him what buttons he needs to press to turn you into his puppet.Observe-observe-observe!
Mothers are probably the biggest obstacle to boys being molded into useful respectful decent men.
Sadly these types of moms exist in my culture, I’m from the mid east Central Asia and also Pakistan
I have a Pakistani friend who is going through this right now with her husband. Having an emotionally incestuous relationship with his sister while treating her (wife0 like an afterthought. This is how patriarchy harms society: by pushing women into a "single" role and allowing them nothing more. OF COURSE the women are going to cling as hard as they can to that "role", even when it becomes "inappropriate"- because it is the ONLY one they are allowed! What other option do they have?
The Ancient Greek language has different words for different types of love. Agape is selfless love, Philo is the love for friends, Storgate is the love for family and Eros is the love for a romantic partner! Thanks for posting this!
Narcisstic mothers raise narcissistic sons
Sometimes, older women are our biggest ops, and this whole video is just one example of that...
… and it be those sons that resent and abuse them.
Oooh what you said about the family.. I realized my family, led by my mom, was being like that with my lady and we GTFO. I stopped talking to her over it. I called my mom all the time before that.. Often mutiple times a day. But saw her clearly when she disrespected my partner and realized she didnt respect or accept me either.
Exactly, especially women who teach their kids not to spend on women and to hold back. Always ib their skns business, doing everything for them so they dont have a sense of being responsible etc.
Imagine being with someone who has mommy issues and so do you.
I WISH I had this info 10 years ago. Would’ve changed my life as a woman. I didn’t realize until I was an adult that I was groomed to be a replacement spouse. So, no one did everything for me, I had to do a lot more than I should have as a minor. So, I put up with a lot more than I should have because I didn’t fully recognize what his mother was doing since mine was toxic in her own way.
I’m embarrassed by how much time I wasted, but I’m glad I figured it out in my early 30s versus 50s and 60s.
I'm more interested in what type of mother creates an abusive male
Is it the mama's boy mom?
or is it the violent abusive mother?
Which one of these moms creates an abusive violent predator who is dangerous to women?
It could be all or it could be none. An abusive person may be predisposed to certain behaviors because of what they saw or experienced growing up. However at the end of the day, it's a choice and (potentially) some undiagnosed mental illness or personality disorder that's often found in a person who's abusive.
But I think it's a choice that person made to behave in that manner.
I think that either could produce a toxic abuser, but in some cases a man raised by a mother like that can turn out to be a decent man after all.
I think toxic mama's boy moms tend to produce men who are eternally dependent on their moms, who don't take responsibility because they have been shielded from it their entire lives, who can't cook or clean and expect their wives/gf's to do all that for them, who seek women with low self-esteems that are willing to settle for a manbaby who never prioritizes her, who are very easily manipulated and influenced by his mom's opinions and who will never be reliable husbands because they're willing to drop their wives for whatever dumbass reason their mom gives. These types of men can also be violent but not all of them necessarily are. They're still super toxic and horrible partners.
I think that a man raised by an abusive, violent mom is more likely to become violent himself. He has been taught that violence is acceptable. The same effect is produced by a man raised by a violent father. These types of men are usually horrible at regulating their emotions, especially if they were shamed for showing emotion when they were kids. They have trauma and since men rarely seek mental health help, they probably haven't learned to cope with it and can be unpredictable, paranoid, distrusting, prone to anger, and reluctant to open up emotionally. They're also more likely to suffer from substance abuse issues, like many people with trauma do. He may also have a sour opinion of women because he might project his mom's actions onto other women.
Of course this is not always the case, similar childhoods can produce very different people. But these are just some patterns I've recognized as I've met and interacted with men who have these types of childhoods.
I want to say it’s really neither of those in most cases. If you’re asking about an abusive male’s origins it boils down more to them witnessing abuse OF their mom or female relative by their dad or male relative and whether or not they empathize with their mother. Victims of direct abuse are more prone to be empathetic to abuse victims and people who share similar characteristics like gender, and witnesses to domestic abuse who empathize with their mom don’t develop mentalities of entitlement, misogyny, and objectify her and other women. It’s the boys and men who don’t empathize with women, or learn not to, who develop those mentalities and become abusive.
Do abusive mothers exist? Absolutely. But if abusive mothers lead to abusive males, there’d be strong evidence to corroborate it. Also that would in turn make those men fearful and cautious of women, which isn’t really the case. Men will say they were abused in their childhood to justify their abuse of people, but there are plenty of men, women and nonbinary people who grow up NOT being abusive from similar and worst backgrounds. Abusive men know they can get a lot of mileage from claiming they’re also a victim, as long as we see their excuse as a justification to BE abusive.
Plus, they get the added benefit of blaming a woman for their abuse of women. Studies by counselors such as Lundy Bancroft can bring more subjects like this into light.
But to answer your question, the most common kind of ‘mother’ that is prone to raise an abusive male isn’t the one that coddles her son to death or is violent toward him. It’s the one that was the recipient of violence and abuse, to which the son doesn’t develop empathy for and adopts his father’s beliefs of her being an object, a utilitarian role to fulfill. And it’s definitely more likely to happen if she stays with his abusive father, because then the son learns that this dynamic ‘should’ be an ‘acceptable’, ‘loving’ relationship.
The single one who punishes him in anger. Try paying attention to that. I'm pretty sure that's a huge reason. Or the one who never punishes.(doesn't matter if single single or not) The one in between is the healthy middle 😅😅😅
@@jessikajane4967both
*I GIVE MY SON HEALTHY BOUNDARIES* 🤷🏾♀️ I DO NOT VIEW MY SON AS MY HUSBAND HE IS MY SON
people need to understand that we don't just stay with mamma boys.... we're coerced & manipulated. we have to keep spreading the word & support one another by arming ourselves with the knowledge necessary in order to completely swerve this situation INSTEAD of bashing/hating on/belittling women that were tricked... idk how it makes sense to kick people while they're down, but it's not giving whatever you think it's giving 🤮💔
Women need to be made AWARE of these issues and there needs to be a LIST of behaviours that women need to look out for. Also, decentering men makes it EASIER to see them and their bullshit clearly and allows women to not be "dazzled" by the fact of relationship! When a woman's freedom and peace of mind becomes the priority, then they are LESS likely to be trapped in a toxic relationship, because they will get out while you still can! This is a benefit of the Internet: that women can exchange information and share their experiences with other women, so we can all LEARN to AVOID toxic men and being'trapped"!
Love and support from Texas ❤😅
Thanks hunny 🤗❤️
@@Priscilla_Boye 🥰🥰🥰
I had a mother call me a gold digger ( he wasnt even rich but very abusive) i refused to want him back. He proposed and i said no. Then SHE was insulted i didnt want him. Shes crazy.
Been there! Got Out!
OMG! Wrapping your legs around a man, or young male teen, is something that a girlfriend/wife does, not the mother of this male person. I have heard stories where a mother will keep her toddler son in her bed long past the time when he should be sleeping in his own bed, which is probably how this mama’s boy behavior gets started. These types of women seem to have an emotional void which even a boyfriend or husband can’t fill and their sons pay the price😢
It's pretty obvious what's she's after; if they aren't already having sex, they will be, sooner or later. She's already OPENLY "inappropriate" with him; the likelihood that this isn't going to escalate into incest at some point is SMALL.
Incest in any form is DISGUSTING!!!!
It's real real BIG on Pornhub, apparently: incest porn. That is going to have repercussions on society, mark my words: making sex with children and relatives "acceptable" in men's eyes. Because that's the effect it will have on them. They will be looking at their daughters and sisters with lustful eyes because in their minds it has been "normalized" by the porn they watch..
Yup. A friend is a 54 year old virgin. He makes great money and between the sister and mother he might stay single forever. The stay by his places. When will he find a wife?
Woah 😮
Maybe he doesn't want one. Not everyone wants marriage or kids.
MY MOTHER NEVER WANTED DAUGHTERS. THEY TOLD HER I WAS A BOY. I CAME OUT A GIRL AND SHE HATED ME FOR IT. RIGHT AFTER ME SHE HAD CHRIS , THE GOLDEN CHILD. HER ONLY BOY. I LOVE HIM BUT HE IS ARROGANT, ENTITLED AND MESSY AF (CLEANS NOTHING). I WAS ABUSED AND TREATED LIKE THE MAID. MY MOTHER HAS ACTED JEALOUS OF CHRIS GIRLFRIENDS AND SAY THINGS LIKE YOUR MAMA IS ALWAYS GONNA BE YOUR NUMBER 1. I CUT HER OUT MY LIFE 3 YEARS AGO I CUT HER OUT MY LIFE. LAST YEAR MY BROTHER AND HIS FIANCE GOT RESTRAINING ORDERS ON MY CRAZY ASS MOTHER smh
Keep them out of your life
Now you are FREE. People don;t seem to appreciate how FREE they are when parents have ignored them all their childhood. Being "free" of family is actually a GIFT: you can live your life any way you please, and can learn what benefits emotional independence and freedom from family pressures can bring!
Reason #168 why I am childfree.
4:53-4:57 Me af! 😭💀
A Mama's boy stole two years of my time. Incompetent. We were in university together so I had some hope. He was studying electrical engineering - He HAD to be smart, right?
No.
He didn't consider that he'd have to program, then dropped out.
I helped him find a job, which he chose the night shift. I told him he'd hate it. He didn't listen, did it anyway, hated it and quit.
This manchild then continued to play RDR2 not contributing financially at all for the next two or three months. He would complain when he'd be asked to use the riding lawn mower every two weeks despite not paying food or rent.
Eventually he ended it saying I deserved better. He was right. But guess who came crawling back?
And guess who told him he wasn't a good friend, let alone a good partner, and kicked him out of her life.
Girls, don't assume he's smart just because of a degree program or a job or any of that other nonsense. Does he pick up the slack when you struggle, yes or no? If it's a no, move on. You'd do it for someone else so you deserve someone who would do it for you.
Blue face & his mommas unhealthy relationship should have been posted on here
I’m so sorry, but exactly how old do you have to be before you stop blaming your mommy for your failed relationships? Father’s behave this way as well. They also create other issues more characterized with toxic father behaviors. At some point it’s up to you to do the work and set the boundaries.
Mother-in-law, more like Monster-in-law
Eh! This point exactly smh The mum's are cray cray, all up in your business, as if their son's cannot make adult decisions without them🧐
what about if he’s a latino man/only child to a mom who was left for another woman 🤪
Where was this stuff 20 years ago?
In the therapist's office!
I lived this
I don't think a man who treats his mother good means it is a mammy issue
You need to see the son-mother relationship as a whole to see the issue
Gosh, this is gross
9:51 💯💯💯💯
I don't like the fact that in the first video he singled out single mothers...
You have men talkibg about the only women they will elevate or love unconditionally are their mothers 🤦🏽♀️
Blueface mum lol
The Mama's boy issue is created by you women, it's you to solve it. By the time someone is grown up it's difficult to unlearn those mistakes. So I encourage you to raise your kids to not be Mamas boys
Lots of fathers are responsible for turning their daughters into entitled princesses who think all men should treat them like their fathers do: no accountability; just take-take-take, while throwing temper tantrums when they don't get what they want, and playing cutesy "head games" like a toddler.
Too late for me. I already ruined my life.
YOU CAN STILL GET OUT
I have all sons and they are definitely Mamas Boys.😊 It's not hard for me to hear any of this. I raise my sons to be husbands and to treat his wife well. I am excited when they meet a girl that I actually like. But, if he chooses someone I don't like, he will know it. She will know it.
He is my child and I want the best for my sons. Fathers are the same way with their daughters. We don't talk nearly as much about Daddy's girls.🙄 Bc everyone LOVES to bash Single Mothers then women in general because we live in a male worshipping society aka patriarchal society.
Single mothers, don't feel bad if you're close to your sons.🥰🥰But, of course, be just as close to your daughter, if you have any daughters.🥰🥰
I would treat my children the same way, no matter their gender.🤷🏾♀️
Overprotective of both. I am this way with all the children in my family and my entire family.🤷🏾♀️🥰🥰❤
My son did say that he would tell his girlfriend/wife that I come first to him always and I quickly corrected him and told him NOT to do that because I do plan for all my sons to MARRY WELL and leave my house so I can live my life once they are all adults.😊
Another note that none of you Childfree ladies talk about is that a lot of you are Highly problematic and AREN'T being raised to be wives. 🙄😑I'll make a video about it. You will probably be offended bc most ppl are offended when ppl are critiquing them, especially CONSTANTLY.
My sons aren't dating/marrying a mess. I will never be their friend. I am their Mother. Their One and Only mother and they will bring their women home to meet me and I will approve/disapprove accordingly.
And, yes, most people date their mother or father. So, you will be compared to their opposite gender parent. Something else ppl will have to deal with when families are close.🤷🏾♀️
If I like a girl/woman then I fully support that relationship and really don't interfere.
If I don't like her because she's a weed head who cheats on my child, mistreats my child, hits my child, can't cook, isn't clean, I won't like her, will be dismissive of her and my son will most likely cut her loose bc at the end of the day, blood is thicker than water and parents, especially the Mother who gave your boyfriend/fiance/husband life will come first because we love your bf/fiance/hubby and were there first, during and always. Mothers and Fathers of your significant other will play a large role in who the boy/man chooses and who their daughter chooses because WE LOVE THEM and rightfully are protective of them. Single mothers, don't change that. Ever
Its like an abuser trying to shame you into abandoning your child so they can mistreat them and abuse them. Nope. Not on my watch.
Sorry. Not sorry.
With all due respect ma'am you are talking too much considering you really have absolutely no control over who your children will end up with and because of your 'know it all' attitude I have a strong feeling that your sons are going to greatly disappoint you😂
I'm confused. You say that you will always come first because you gave your son life, but then earlier you said that your son had told you that he was going to tell his future wife that you come first to him and you told him to not say that. Why? If you believe that you should be first priority to your sons over his possible future wife/kids, why should he have to lie about it or hide it?
@lauraanderson8785 I come first because I am The Mother. My sons first true love is for his mother. Just as a girl's first true love is for her father.
My sons ONLY bring women home if they know she is someone who he is serious about and who he KNOWS I will approve of.
My opinion of you matters before we even meet.
I believe all parents are like this with their children which is why most people are nervous to meet the parents.
If I like you and you treat my son well, I won't interfere because I have my own life. But, Single mothers and/or fathers of these children will be there before the new girl, during and after that girl leaves.
People hop on the Internet and just say anything and I'm here to let you Ladies know what it really is irl. I'm not changing for the Internet. This is my family and my real life and I don't play about my children. I never have and won't start now.
The answer to the second part of your question is IF I approve of the woman my son is dating/marrying, I won't need to interfere. I raise my sons to be GOOD husbands so, no, I don't plan to come before his wife.
But, we are all lying to ourselves if any of you think that sons won't talk to their mother about their girlfriends/wives. I'm the Matriarch of my family so I will have some input and will offer guidance because that is still my child and I am Elder in our family.
But, I don't want any of my sons to put me above his wife. However, most children will hold their parents in high regard, as they should because we are their parents. And my sons know they will have to take care of me as I age. His wife will have to be Ok with that too.
My advice to women is to be respectful of the mother and father of your boyfriend/fiance/husband. You'll have a better experience overall.
I was married before and I consider my in-laws to be another set of parents. I am divorced but they are still like my parents. I RESPECT them and listen to them like I would my own parents.
I am BIG on RESPECT. If a woman doesn't respect me, I know my sons won't tolerate it and I won't either.
@omphilemoerane2569 You sound stupid and childfree. People always say this but then ask where the parents are when kids are bad. We either have control or don't. And you're blabbing alot to not know my sons or me.
I have raised 1 son into adulthood. And second just got his driver's license and will be an adult next year.
I have 3 younger sons.
What's your qualifications?
I have heard what you said before but it's funny because everything I want my sons to do, they do it. They know Mama Knows Best and I'm ALWAYS looking out for THEIR best interest.
I'm sharing this with you to prepare you so YOU all know that Single Mothers don't owe you anything. You all are trying to date/marry OUR CHILDREN, not the other way around. You have NOTHING I want or need.
Being RESPECTFUL to the Woman who raised your boyfriend/fiance/husband ALONE would be BEST for you.
@libiaamares Fathers approve who their daughters date. There's cultures that still arrange marriages. Imagine that!
So, yea, I do still plan to help my sons choose the best wife for him because that is going to be my daughters-in-law and the mothers of our grandchildren.
People are so delusional if they think parents won't have any say in who their kids bring home. There's much older adults still dating badly and choosing undesirable partners.
We are building generational wealth over here so nothing is done willy nilly with us.
You sound like you're afraid you won't make the cut. That's more of a YOU problem. Not an US problem.😊
And I guess there's some jealousy for some folks because no one cares to help you pick better partners. It's sad that that is your life. You'll have to learn by experience and that could be very damaging and dangerous.
NEVER AGAIN @kai hoag