George Carlin - Balance the Budget

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  • Опубліковано 8 вер 2024
  • George Carlin's brilliant idea on how to balance the budget by eliminating prisons...
    RIP George...
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 4,9 тис.

  • @frogboi8166
    @frogboi8166 5 років тому +12982

    The most inspirational TED talk I've ever watched

  • @abb5596
    @abb5596 4 роки тому +7258

    The more i watch of this guy, the more im convinced he wasnt doing stand up

    • @a2ndopynyn
      @a2ndopynyn 4 роки тому +664

      He was a philosopher with a sense of humor.

    • @Eranell
      @Eranell 4 роки тому +197

      It's funny because it's true.

    • @georgeovia
      @georgeovia 4 роки тому +15

      Hamza Jay I agree aha

    • @mariogonzalez1540
      @mariogonzalez1540 4 роки тому +56

      Me too. He isn't funny. This is more of a motivational speech.

    • @tyronenathan8209
      @tyronenathan8209 4 роки тому +17

      No, not at all. He was always talking his shit.

  • @schr4nz
    @schr4nz 5 років тому +2169

    Brilliantly layered, he's basically mocking the government for caring about balancing the budget whilst not caring much about its people

    • @TheBaseballGuy9
      @TheBaseballGuy9 4 роки тому +194

      And a terrific critique of the prison industrial complex and private prisons that care less about rehabilitation and more about profits

    • @turbostyler
      @turbostyler 4 роки тому +132

      He's not mocking government, he's mocking society. Our government is a reflection of society.

    • @kevinkieb904
      @kevinkieb904 4 роки тому +6

      @@turbostyler FACTS!!!

    • @firstandlastswagman269
      @firstandlastswagman269 4 роки тому

      People piss
      All ur faith full

    • @firstandlastswagman269
      @firstandlastswagman269 4 роки тому +1

      Hammerd

  • @ianfortuna9385
    @ianfortuna9385 2 роки тому +2990

    If George Carlin was still with us today he’d have one of the most successful podcasts of all time.

    • @gangstapenguin2773
      @gangstapenguin2773 2 роки тому +96

      regardless of what one thinks of Joe Rogan, Carlin's JRE episode would be something to see

    • @ianfortuna9385
      @ianfortuna9385 2 роки тому +5

      @@gangstapenguin2773 got to be something

    • @yusifhuseini
      @yusifhuseini 2 роки тому +25

      wrong, he would be canceled bcos some ppl are offended.

    • @ianfortuna9385
      @ianfortuna9385 2 роки тому +40

      @@yusifhuseini wrong!

    • @ianfortuna9385
      @ianfortuna9385 2 роки тому +33

      @@yusifhuseini you can’t cancel people who fight cancel culture.

  • @root19733
    @root19733 5 років тому +3793

    "Drug addicts and alcoholics. Not all of them, don't get nervous."
    Oh, thank God. I mean, thank Pesci

    • @riotraverv4518
      @riotraverv4518 4 роки тому +31

      Lmao, good one

    • @krmdagger1126
      @krmdagger1126 4 роки тому +5

      Tell ungbungalo that

    • @shadekiahpops8988
      @shadekiahpops8988 4 роки тому +9

      Nice, very nice. You are a very funny person. Many would be offended , not me. This genius is not well known in my country South Africa. I wish he was.

    • @randomvswhat5193
      @randomvswhat5193 4 роки тому +4

      We get it you smoke weed and drink a six pack before your shift at Wal-Mart, you're so cool and funny!

    • @sean8102
      @sean8102 4 роки тому +24

      @@randomvswhat5193 And you seem like a fun person to be around...

  • @AnimusPrime87
    @AnimusPrime87 4 роки тому +3330

    I love the enthusiastic guy in the crowd responding to him. “That’s me!” “Fuck ‘em!”, “Delaware!”.

    • @genevieverheuban8365
      @genevieverheuban8365 3 роки тому +141

      Don’t forget when he said “ rrrr’a”

    • @begirbigger7843
      @begirbigger7843 3 роки тому +92

      Where will you put this guy? Utah?

    • @AnimusPrime87
      @AnimusPrime87 3 роки тому +126

      @@begirbigger7843 He volunteered himself for that group.

    • @KickflipGnasty
      @KickflipGnasty 3 роки тому +39

      Hahaha I know I love that guy too. The more I listened to this bit the more I noticed how much he was contributing lol

    • @dant7072
      @dant7072 3 роки тому +9

      I'm guessing it's him doing all the shrieking as well

  • @maximturcan1722
    @maximturcan1722 8 років тому +10342

    This is pretty much how Australia started.

    • @neo2419912
      @neo2419912 8 років тому +332

      He's right.

    • @squatch545
      @squatch545 8 років тому +45

      Lol...

    • @turtleboy8827
      @turtleboy8827 8 років тому +63

      You dont know much about history do you?

    • @maximturcan1722
      @maximturcan1722 7 років тому +196

      Stefan Kovacevic wow, way to waste your time responding to me. Turns out you're not too much of a genius yourself.

    • @quizmaster85
      @quizmaster85 7 років тому +55

      Maxim Turcan I may be from Australia, but I'll pay that!

  • @niranjannaik8787
    @niranjannaik8787 2 роки тому +326

    Valid, no bullshit, blunt, remorseless and a genius who comes around once in a lifetime. And he always, absolutely always, spoke the truth. We miss you so much George. Rip...

    • @SPAnComCat
      @SPAnComCat Місяць тому +2

      Not to Mention he is Honest While being Hilarious.

    • @niranjannaik8787
      @niranjannaik8787 Місяць тому

      @@SPAnComCat very very true

    • @SPAnComCat
      @SPAnComCat Місяць тому

      @@niranjannaik8787 👍

  • @christophercox8927
    @christophercox8927 5 років тому +2191

    What a privilege it must have been to see George Carlin live.

    • @woodyanderson922
      @woodyanderson922 4 роки тому +57

      I was so lucky. The tour before his last comedy special. He died only 3 or 4 years later.

    • @loutorres2270
      @loutorres2270 4 роки тому

      P-LEASE!!!! WHAT AN UNFUNNY / NO TALENT FUCK!

    • @a2ndopynyn
      @a2ndopynyn 4 роки тому +33

      @@loutorres2270 What color is the sky in your world, snowflake?

    • @TheGodYouWishYouKnew
      @TheGodYouWishYouKnew 4 роки тому +6

      Christopher Cox I saw him on the Life Is Worth Losing tour. It was good but not much better than watching it on HBO.

    • @medicah
      @medicah 4 роки тому +19

      Lou Torres maybe you don’t find him funny and that’s ok for sure. But to say he has no talent is objectively false

  • @Dezdichado1000
    @Dezdichado1000 4 роки тому +1540

    Even if we ignore the fact that he was way ahead of his times with his intelligence, humor etc etc, he also had a way with words like no one else ever had.

    • @nimmernomma8830
      @nimmernomma8830 3 роки тому +6

      ahhhhh, a way with words

    • @ATFprdepartment
      @ATFprdepartment 3 роки тому +11

      5:12 exhibit A

    • @thecpmr6276
      @thecpmr6276 3 роки тому +10

      7:41 or the beginning part of life is worth losing are great examples. He'd be a weirdly good poet, I think.

    • @NO-gh4qp
      @NO-gh4qp 2 роки тому +1

      youtube A Modern Man - George Carlin or his first bit off Life Is Worth Losing. Phenomenal spoken word fr

    • @applejacks971
      @applejacks971 2 роки тому +6

      On his 'A Place for my Stuff' album, he literally stated just that. He said "I'm ahead of my time. The problem is, I'm only about 10 minutes ahead" :)

  • @silverwindspirit
    @silverwindspirit 5 років тому +2224

    "Everyone will have guns, everyone will have drugs and no one will be in charge. Just like now!"-george carlin.
    Has anything really changed since then?

    • @itookallthenames
      @itookallthenames 4 роки тому +42

      from australia it seems like yes, and the republicans still want to take your drugs and the democrats still want to take your guns!

    • @Gardstyle35
      @Gardstyle35 4 роки тому +17

      @@finn264 until the first shoots and the paranoid druggies with guns join in

    • @jajupa78
      @jajupa78 4 роки тому +1

      Knowone.

    • @twasgracethattaught
      @twasgracethattaught 4 роки тому

      No

    • @focusaddiction3460
      @focusaddiction3460 4 роки тому +3

      Yes, too many people are in charge now, they're taking over, everything changed. Carlin, the poor guy, had it good back then and didn't know haha

  • @whobitmyname
    @whobitmyname 6 місяців тому +23

    "The ones who live out where the buses don't run."
    In the crowd: "That's me!"

  • @hapowoverhere7951
    @hapowoverhere7951 4 роки тому +1914

    Is George Carlin’s comedy anyone else’s therapy at a time like this?😞

    • @marcelocaraveo6028
      @marcelocaraveo6028 4 роки тому +6

      Hapow Over Here man he was right about everything RIP

    • @nikaqavtaradze4443
      @nikaqavtaradze4443 4 роки тому +6

      You're not the only one man

    • @hapowoverhere7951
      @hapowoverhere7951 4 роки тому +6

      randy Ladouceur No need to “look it up”. I grew up watching George Carlin on a big wooden box tv on HBO, have seen him twice, and this is not the virus that turns out insides to “liquid shit”. This is a very mild virus that is HIGHLY contagious. Unhealthy people are dying from this. If it was a super virus, healthy and unhealthy people would be dying with the same contagion

    • @goodun2974
      @goodun2974 4 роки тому +8

      @@hapowoverhere7951 , "unhealthy people" includes a third or more of the (tyoically obese, sedentary, semi-diabetic) American population; and 95% of *grandparents*, which includes my wife and I. I am 62, not obese, mobile, but I had heart surgery a couple months ago. Do I deserve to die? PS, viruses can, and often do, mutate, becoming increasingly virulent as it jumps from host to host; if this one mutates, it could become deadly to people of all ages. Better to isolate ourselves and let it burn out from lack of new victims than to let it continue its course.

    • @BGcam
      @BGcam 4 роки тому

      Hapow Over Here somebody listens to too much corporate media. COVID19 is a serious virus that’s killing healthy, young people. Also, the people for whom the virus reaches the lungs may have long-term damage to their lungs. www.dw.com/en/covid-19-recovered-patients-have-partially-reduced-lung-function/a-52859671. www.itv.com/news/2020-03-31/13-year-old-boy-with-covid-19-dies-as-uk-sees-biggest-day-on-day-rise-in-deaths/. www.goodmorningamerica.com/wellness/story/healthy-18-year-speaks-contracting-covid-19-happen-69968217. gizmodo.com/teen-who-died-of-covid-19-was-denied-treatment-because-1842520539

  • @Clem-Kadiddlehopper
    @Clem-Kadiddlehopper 3 роки тому +988

    "We don't have time for rational solutions!" Great line...

    • @carreviewer6345
      @carreviewer6345 Рік тому +8

      "You could outlaw religion"

    • @andrina118
      @andrina118 8 місяців тому +5

      And that's just thrown in. Some comics would try to build an entire career off of a few lines from this bit

    • @FNMarketMaven
      @FNMarketMaven 6 місяців тому +1

      😂😂

  • @TheJay144
    @TheJay144 8 років тому +2474

    This man was way ahead of his time

    • @MrKenny777
      @MrKenny777 7 років тому +42

      Jason Great comedians are always highly intelligent. None more so than George Carlin. Bill Mahr is a pale imitation of this man.

    • @michaponka846
      @michaponka846 7 років тому +6

      Problem is he was only hour and a half ahead ;)

    • @HowlyPhook
      @HowlyPhook 7 років тому +3

      J.R. Ewing Bill Burr?

    • @Muscle462Memory
      @Muscle462Memory 7 років тому +1

      trouble is, he was only about an hour and a half ahead

    • @jamesmoore9271
      @jamesmoore9271 7 років тому +8

      George Carlin was blunt, real, and breathtakingly honest. Bill Burr is an arrogant ginger cunt basket.

  • @scottmcamis2127
    @scottmcamis2127 9 місяців тому +58

    George is sorely needed today!

  • @SirParcifal
    @SirParcifal 6 років тому +2814

    My father introduced me to George Carlin when I was 11 years old. My mom was soooo pissed. While other fathers were taking their daughters to dances and treating them like princesses, my Vietnam Vet dad made me watch George Carlin; John Belusi, Sam Kenison, Richard Pryor, and taught me how to work on my car; paint, clean a pool and mow a lawn. Thank you dad for introducing me to the 2nd greatest man on Earth! RIP POPS

    • @ahpacific
      @ahpacific 6 років тому +92

      Good dad!

    • @trythinkingforachange4201
      @trythinkingforachange4201 6 років тому +27

      Forget Kinison, the rest were good except Carlin - he was great.

    • @dittokitty85
      @dittokitty85 6 років тому +23

      Likewise but grandpa ww2 instead. Plus rated R movies too lol.🕯

    • @honeygfunkypish8404
      @honeygfunkypish8404 5 років тому +10

      I live your dad

    • @unboy915
      @unboy915 5 років тому +28

      damn, is you dad Chuck Norris? lol

  • @OMGtheykilledKenny42
    @OMGtheykilledKenny42 9 років тому +1227

    "Everyone will have guns, everyone will have drugs, and no one will be in charge. Just like now! But at least we'll have a balanced budget." Among GC's best quotes.

    • @MrWalker1000
      @MrWalker1000 6 років тому +3

      never really understood what he means by this. Because lots of people are in prisons so what does he mean just like now.

    • @sirchris6047
      @sirchris6047 6 років тому +15

      You mean all of the cops?

    • @dasein9980
      @dasein9980 6 років тому +10

      MrWalker1000 perhaps he means we live in a kind of lawless anarchy or perhaps he means the guys with the guns aren't really in charge. For instance, owning guns or being a policeman doesn't automatically make you one of the people in charge, the powers that be. They don't need guns. They have others do their dirty work.

    • @peanutt98
      @peanutt98 6 років тому +5

      Who knew he could have predicted Colorado. Weed is legal everyone has guns. And your budget is busting out the seams... lol!

    • @E.a.Z.S.e.n.T
      @E.a.Z.S.e.n.T 9 місяців тому

      I was looking for a comment with replies on that...at the end when he said that got me wondering what all that had to do with a balance budget.? Can you elaborate that quote and what it meant

  • @ImOK68
    @ImOK68 4 роки тому +1142

    12 years after his death hes still up to date on current events

    • @sunnysmiles8211
      @sunnysmiles8211 3 роки тому +6

      1000000000%%% absolutely ON POINT

    • @Spongebob0911
      @Spongebob0911 3 роки тому +18

      Truth never gets old and has no expiry date ...

    • @lordfogg9728
      @lordfogg9728 3 роки тому +7

      Society hasn't changed much...

    • @jerrylee2698
      @jerrylee2698 3 роки тому +3

      he was our Plato and jester

    • @thelastword4616
      @thelastword4616 3 роки тому +2

      There is nothing new under the sun.

  • @markmarderosian9657
    @markmarderosian9657 2 роки тому +94

    It took me awhile to get up to speed with the genius within that ending. He starts off talking about something outlandish for the future and brings it around to the fact that these are the conditions that exist right now.

    • @lukusblack6442
      @lukusblack6442 2 роки тому +5

      I suggest you don't read 1984, or watch Idiocracy if you're starting to note similarities with real life.

  • @davidkarstensen9677
    @davidkarstensen9677 5 років тому +2268

    It's too bad George isn't still alive today. He would be going nuts seeing his prophecies fulfilled

    • @davisnicholas9123
      @davisnicholas9123 5 років тому +73

      So much material for him

    • @twmax6525
      @twmax6525 5 років тому +34

      God, I would give my life to make him live forever.

    • @amicloud_yt
      @amicloud_yt 5 років тому +80

      @@twmax6525 Why would you curse that upon the man? :c

    • @RevenantCheetosx
      @RevenantCheetosx 5 років тому +8

      Release the Uncle Daves.

    • @sha11235
      @sha11235 5 років тому +29

      He would've loved Trump and the Wall St. meltdown that occurred after his death.

  • @streakydrip8792
    @streakydrip8792 3 роки тому +230

    "We don't have time for rational solutions" I felt that hard.

  • @karenielsen4713
    @karenielsen4713 4 роки тому +4713

    George would have a field day with 2020... “Pandemic you say? About f***ing time!!!” 😂
    Edit: Hey guys! Thanks for all your likes - hope you are safe out there. Peace!

    • @Behemoth9030
      @Behemoth9030 4 роки тому +166

      Technically he did predict this shit 🤣

    • @karenielsen4713
      @karenielsen4713 4 роки тому +35

      Paul Borst Wow.. Nice fact. I was not aware of that. Anyways.. he is missed sorely 😓

    • @victorywoo
      @victorywoo 4 роки тому +17

      @Paul Borst So you think George wouldn't have done a routine on the pandemic because of how sensitive it could get?

    • @victorywoo
      @victorywoo 4 роки тому +32

      @Paul Borst I guess we'll just never know for sure. George was a very thoughtful man, yes, but at the same time was ruthless at making fun of everything. And because COVID-19 is a different beast than 9/11, I personally think he would have at least made a joke or two about it, maybe in the way he passingly mentioned 9/11 in 2002. Just a thought though.

    • @EatPezzzz
      @EatPezzzz 4 роки тому +13

      He did do a bit about a "pandemic" that's later on in this show. Watch the entire thing or search "George Carlin germs".

  • @supersaiyanzero386
    @supersaiyanzero386 2 роки тому +56

    The culmination of all of this into "just like now" was one of the best things I've ever heard.

  • @KaizokuKevin
    @KaizokuKevin 7 років тому +2167

    Lol carlin just pitches the hunger games

    • @pepperroni2810
      @pepperroni2810 6 років тому +48

      battle royale is earlier than this.... it is the inspiration behind the hunger games

    • @sirchris6047
      @sirchris6047 6 років тому +2

      But not like this

    • @enlightenmentdoesntcomeeas5337
      @enlightenmentdoesntcomeeas5337 6 років тому +2

      We should do this....

    • @harfast10
      @harfast10 6 років тому +20

      Escape from New York.

    • @DlcEnergy
      @DlcEnergy 6 років тому +6

      Harfast these bloody kids these days. i'm surprised they didn't say fortnite.

  • @jaymana2569
    @jaymana2569 4 роки тому +1163

    I came for the laughs, I stayed for the Knowledge.

    • @patriotwave3975
      @patriotwave3975 4 роки тому +9

      Jay Mana I'm 14 and this is deep

    • @barneyblack7944
      @barneyblack7944 4 роки тому +14

      @@patriotwave3975 doesn't matter how old you are, George speaks volumes to everyone. I'm 22 and going to listening to im old as fuck. Yes its deep. All of his stuff is deep

    • @Tecolote41
      @Tecolote41 4 роки тому +3

      Barney Black Woosh

    • @chrisirving4735
      @chrisirving4735 3 роки тому +4

      He was facsinating. Love to listen to him. So intelligent.

    • @lugialover09
      @lugialover09 3 роки тому

      @@barneyblack7944 I'm 25, and I personally find this kind of material extremely cynical and over the top. Yeah, shit can be fucked at times, but he genuinely painted society like it was some goddamn nightmare. This isn't even comedy really. He just ranted for awhile without making any valid jokes. Contrast this with his earlier work which I actually think is funny.

  • @SquirrilahFish
    @SquirrilahFish 4 роки тому +1700

    “You give em a couple hundred dollars for their inconvenience”
    Covid-19 comes to mind.

    • @miket.220
      @miket.220 3 роки тому +42

      "Just like now!"

    • @automatonm99
      @automatonm99 3 роки тому +6

      More then 200, when are they sending the fourth stimulus btw?

    • @duncanotema
      @duncanotema 2 роки тому +1

      “Stimulus”

    • @saberiandream316
      @saberiandream316 2 роки тому +3

      @@miket.220 And we don't even have a balanced budget!

    • @C0SMICP0TAT0
      @C0SMICP0TAT0 2 роки тому +3

      Agreed, the worst symptom of covid was being moved out of the state of Kansas

  • @ElusivEnigma
    @ElusivEnigma 10 місяців тому +38

    His message went over SO MANY HEADS....

  • @uditbhatia4196
    @uditbhatia4196 4 роки тому +449

    I must have watched this like 200 times in past 10 years and honestly, I think this stand-up deserves a Nobel prize for comedy and writing.

    • @donwilcox728
      @donwilcox728 2 роки тому +15

      I could see reading this in a book and being amazed at the writing.

    • @sandraalegria3439
      @sandraalegria3439 8 місяців тому +1

      He his so transparent. The truth .

  • @aristogan
    @aristogan 7 років тому +675

    Carlin told Playboy in 2005 that he looked forward to an afterlife where he could watch the decline of civilization on a "heavenly CNN."
    "The world is a big theatre-in-the round as far as I'm concerned, and I'd love to watch it spin itself into oblivion," he said. "Tune in and watch the human adventure."

    • @jackvanderpool3417
      @jackvanderpool3417 6 років тому +5

      George isn't in Heaven

    • @synthwavedreamin2268
      @synthwavedreamin2268 6 років тому +13

      no hes dead

    • @trythinkingforachange4201
      @trythinkingforachange4201 6 років тому +29

      There is no heaven Jack. It's all an imaginary story from an ancient book written to control others (like ALL religions)

    • @EC-pl3px
      @EC-pl3px 5 років тому +8

      That’s religious people belong with the crazies in Utah

    • @EC-pl3px
      @EC-pl3px 5 років тому +5

      The majority of people are religious today, (stupid). No wonder everyone are slaves.

  • @thatcrystalpie
    @thatcrystalpie 4 роки тому +612

    G: "They gotta go over to Utah."
    Everyone: * laughing *
    that one guy: *dELAWARE!*

    • @JoeyTofMetroMusic
      @JoeyTofMetroMusic 4 роки тому +30

      That one guy was very annoying. He yelled a couple of times during the performance.

    • @omega1575
      @omega1575 4 роки тому +38

      “People who live out where the busses don’t run”
      That one dude: “THATS ME!”

    • @howardOKC
      @howardOKC 4 роки тому +25

      @Rental Cyprus sorry, i was that fucking idiot. I love Utah and I don't want my state to be full of maniacs. But my ex is from Delaware.

    • @christopherch
      @christopherch 3 роки тому

      @@howardOKC ok!

    • @AlexOtto
      @AlexOtto 3 роки тому +5

      @@howardOKC Ex is from Delaware ahahahaha. Now that makes a lot more sense 🤣🤣🤣

  • @alexcrawford5350
    @alexcrawford5350 10 місяців тому +11

    “The ones who live out where the buses don’t run.” *“THAT’S MEEE!”*

  • @mrgames4people
    @mrgames4people 6 років тому +1031

    4:41 "The ones who live out where the busses don't run"
    "THATS ME"
    😂

    • @diggitydoo5836
      @diggitydoo5836 6 років тому +44

      mrgames4people To be fair, it's because America has no public transport. Almost everyone lives where buses don't run.

    • @bradleycotton3237
      @bradleycotton3237 5 років тому +2

      mrgames4people Said Bertie to Thomas.

    • @theghost1234100
      @theghost1234100 5 років тому +1

      David Ullman if you think it is bad in the US then try it here, i can walk faster to school than taking the bus and i have 3,5 miles

    • @dezmonddurham7366
      @dezmonddurham7366 5 років тому

      Off to Utah with you

  • @volcryndarkstar
    @volcryndarkstar 4 роки тому +581

    4:40 "The ones who live out where the busses don't run." "THAT'S ME!!!" 🤣

  • @ninearthify
    @ninearthify 9 років тому +328

    RIP George Carlin. Hero of those who were not born to be mindless consumers.

    • @baayzil97
      @baayzil97 6 років тому +7

      ninearthify so you're a mindful consumer.. good for you 🙂

    • @grandmasterhashmixtapemast910
      @grandmasterhashmixtapemast910 6 років тому +10

      That guy probably has a broken wrist from patting himself on the back so much.

    • @kaptaintrips
      @kaptaintrips 6 років тому

      What guy?

    • @grandmasterhashmixtapemast910
      @grandmasterhashmixtapemast910 6 років тому +5

      "RIP George Carlin. Hero of those who were not born to be mindless consumers". Self-congratulatory as fuck.

    • @yankee2666
      @yankee2666 6 років тому +2

      In other words, you're broke.

  • @Artiej0hn0
    @Artiej0hn0 2 роки тому +92

    One of the amazing things about Carlin is that he never let his audience own him. Some really fine and celebrated comedians have fallen into that trap.

    • @godnotavailable2094
      @godnotavailable2094 10 місяців тому +10

      His style is a lot more rehearsed than most. I've heard that he wrote entire specials down word for word and just memorized them. He definitely did not have the time nor the patience for hecklers.

  • @NoizyBoyUS
    @NoizyBoyUS 7 років тому +8350

    Anyone else on a george carlin marathon?

  • @noddle045
    @noddle045 3 роки тому +838

    “rectangular states are cheaper to fence, saves the taxpayers some money” lmfao. You can tell he’s thought really hard about this lol.

    • @khalilrahme5227
      @khalilrahme5227 3 роки тому +18

      He'd been doing this for 40 years or something.

    • @procompsys
      @procompsys 2 роки тому +10

      If they touch each other and have common borders, yes. For all other cases: Of all rectangles with same circumference, the square covers the greatest area. Taking ALL shapes with same circumference into account, the CIRCLE covers the greatest area!

    • @davidwuhrer6704
      @davidwuhrer6704 2 роки тому +7

      @@procompsys Hexagons.
      Hexagons are the shape that fences in the largest continuously touching areas with the least circumferences.
      Not squares.

    • @k1ln1k37
      @k1ln1k37 2 роки тому +9

      More thought than our actual government puts into non-hypothetical engagements lol

    • @michaelbarlow6610
      @michaelbarlow6610 2 роки тому +4

      @@davidwuhrer6704 . But, as George Carlin would point out, there are no hexagonal-shaped states!

  • @B0NY_HAWK
    @B0NY_HAWK 3 роки тому +416

    There will never be another George Carlin. This man was so ahead of his time.

    • @txmale1977
      @txmale1977 3 роки тому +14

      Political correctness killed Comedy

    • @CamRebires
      @CamRebires 2 роки тому

      There will never be a time that matches him, that motherfucker was truly larger-than-life

    • @markcarey67
      @markcarey67 2 роки тому +1

      Tim Dillon is pretty much the closest as far as contemporary comedians

    • @CamRebires
      @CamRebires 2 роки тому

      @@markcarey67 dude's never had an original clever thought, he's just a fat kid angry at everything. If Alex Jones didn't read. No comparison to mighty G.

    • @chrislaprise7745
      @chrislaprise7745 2 роки тому

      Amen Bony!

  • @BrandonMinguez
    @BrandonMinguez 2 роки тому +47

    After hearing the news about Patrick Carlin today, it’s time to binge as much George Carlin as possible. RIP to another comedy great.

  • @krypticunlimited6925
    @krypticunlimited6925 6 років тому +433

    0:56 "The only thing you give them is lethal weapons and live ammunition-"
    *FucK EM!!*

    • @lickdacat2
      @lickdacat2 5 років тому +9

      THIS IS A TRULY INCREDIBLE IDEA THAT WOULD BALANCE THE BUDGET QUICKLY WHILE REMOVING THE WORST CRlMlNAL SCUM OF S0ClETY.
      IT WILL CREATE FOUR MOSTLY CH0C0LATE STATES WHICH WILL MAKE A CERTAIN GROUP OF OVERLY PRlVlLEGED "PE0PLE" HAPPY AS HELL.

    • @klutz3955
      @klutz3955 5 років тому +2

      There's another one later on "THATS ME"

    • @alexgreen1559
      @alexgreen1559 4 роки тому +1

      @@lickdacat2 I hope you like Utah...

    • @55187706344
      @55187706344 4 роки тому

      @@alexgreen1559 lol

  • @richardbarry04553
    @richardbarry04553 4 роки тому +639

    Somehow George Carlin’s brilliance was such that his words just age like the finest wine - no one knew just how right he was about everything

    • @TheAtkey
      @TheAtkey 4 роки тому +15

      We knew. I think he wants to be said "my job is to remind you of things you forgot to laugh at" or something to that effect couldn't find the exact quote.

    • @kaymedra6665
      @kaymedra6665 2 роки тому

      Absolutely!

    • @J5mobile
      @J5mobile Рік тому

      If you think about it. He predicted Colorado Now everybody's getting stoned

  • @MayoRopeRusty
    @MayoRopeRusty 3 роки тому +116

    the world is at a loss without this philosopher !

  • @brianm.armstrong70
    @brianm.armstrong70 2 роки тому +90

    The man was a genius...saying it like it is, and, at the same time, giving us all a laugh at our own expense! Genius!

    • @scottlee9373
      @scottlee9373 2 роки тому

      Practice Awareness Religiously.

  • @davethelong5093
    @davethelong5093 4 роки тому +75

    I love the guy who shouted "That's me!" when George started talking about the crazy people

  • @Isaac0110
    @Isaac0110 4 роки тому +343

    4:43 Did anyone notice someone yell "that's me." When he talked about crazy people?

    • @haydengroover590
      @haydengroover590 4 роки тому +17

      Came down here to see if anyone else did lol

    • @Murderbation
      @Murderbation 4 роки тому +17

      This was back when people weren't offended if they were made fun of 😂

    • @brienmaybe.4415
      @brienmaybe.4415 3 роки тому

      He was wearing a bugs bunny outfit during this taping.

  • @betsyveritas1055
    @betsyveritas1055 Рік тому +48

    I'll always love George Carlin. He was the funniest, most right on comic in the early 70s during the height of the counterculture. He was brilliant & poignant & painfully truthful. He made us laugh at ourselves. I miss him terribly.

    • @DH-xm3hc
      @DH-xm3hc 5 місяців тому

      Me too✌️ So glad I got to see him for the first time in a suit and tie, with his Military hair cut on the Johnny Carson Show. ✌️❤️🌼

  • @anamericanpatriot1026
    @anamericanpatriot1026 4 роки тому +90

    George: "The ones who live out where the buses dont run."
    Some dude: "THAT'S ME!!"

  • @capmendonca
    @capmendonca 4 роки тому +205

    This is how you hear the truth without getting depressed

    • @joechapman2981
      @joechapman2981 2 роки тому +2

      Exactly Charles. I get freaked out sometimes hearing this crap on the news

  • @Equitay
    @Equitay 8 років тому +872

    4:45 "The ones out where the buses don't run.." "Thats me!" Hahahah

    • @Mazaroth
      @Mazaroth 8 років тому +39

      +Equitay That guy is fucking awesome, he keeps yelling the loudest all the time on this show :D

    • @Equitay
      @Equitay 8 років тому +10

      He is hilarious. Sitting beside him would have been great XD Mazaroth

    • @russelltalker
      @russelltalker 8 років тому +9

      A unique insight into the mind of a heckler. Please continue.

    • @guikirsch9758
      @guikirsch9758 8 років тому +7

      A few seconds later some other dude made some hilarious noise

    • @Furykidxxx
      @Furykidxxx 7 років тому +9

      The case when the hecklers can actually be funny! :D

  • @justlooking4771
    @justlooking4771 Рік тому +7

    Holy shit. Watching this in July 2023 and he was spot on!

  • @davidmcmichael8843
    @davidmcmichael8843 3 роки тому +200

    George Carlin was a true gift to humanity, and this is my favorite bit by him. 😂🤣😂

    • @tomh3652
      @tomh3652 2 роки тому +3

      My favorite is a list of people that outta be killed. It is funny as hell.

    • @niranjannaik8787
      @niranjannaik8787 2 роки тому +1

      Oh... You Are so right

    • @niranjannaik8787
      @niranjannaik8787 2 роки тому +1

      Absolutely

  • @taleleny5999
    @taleleny5999 7 років тому +107

    Back when George was listened to, no one was in charge...Just like now.

    • @tysonromaniuk7674
      @tysonromaniuk7674 7 років тому +2

      Tale Leny he didn't really fall out of the public eye. he died

    • @taleleny5999
      @taleleny5999 7 років тому +5

      Tyson Romaniuk He's not dead, look at how many views these George Carlin videos receive, he's live-er than ever.

    • @tysonromaniuk7674
      @tysonromaniuk7674 7 років тому +2

      Tale Leny he passed away june 22 2008

    • @taleleny5999
      @taleleny5999 7 років тому +10

      Tyson Romaniuk And yet he's still living. Look at the views.

    • @jonsnor4313
      @jonsnor4313 6 років тому +1

      .. just like now, best quote.

  • @su-san675
    @su-san675 4 роки тому +360

    "The rapists and molesters - those hopeless romantics..."

    • @spanishinquisition4616
      @spanishinquisition4616 3 роки тому +26

      "who are so full of love, they end up getting a lil on ya, usually on your leg."

    • @jstravelers4094
      @jstravelers4094 4 місяці тому

      The Trumps of the world who get away with everything.

  • @daredevil1956
    @daredevil1956 6 місяців тому +4

    Can you imagine, for a moment, having George Carlin, Ricky Gervais, and Jimmy Carr on the same stage, discussing the state of the world today? I would mortgage my house to see that.

  • @ryanolink5054
    @ryanolink5054 3 роки тому +320

    If he was still alive his Twitter account would be the most famous account ever I love it😭

    • @ericbarkewitz7586
      @ericbarkewitz7586 3 роки тому +46

      He wouldn't have a Twitter account

    • @27jerry27
      @27jerry27 3 роки тому +11

      Twitter wouldn't allow that...lol

    • @theflipper404
      @theflipper404 3 роки тому +10

      @ProteusXF nah I don't think they would cancel him, he was actually pretty liberal lol.

    • @jaidendeprez1842
      @jaidendeprez1842 2 роки тому +2

      wbt John Lennon?

    • @anormalguy511
      @anormalguy511 2 роки тому +6

      @@theflipper404
      He wasn't even liberal he was pretty close to being a communist. His views were really close to the likes of Noam Chomsky

  • @SupaBlank
    @SupaBlank 8 років тому +1242

    Ha holy shit Carlin predicted reality TV and colorado as a drug state, lookout naustrodamous

    • @goaway8871
      @goaway8871 8 років тому +26

      Not hard to predict "reality TV" when Survivor was already on the air, and MTVs Real World had been around for over a decade.

    • @SuperSaltydog77
      @SuperSaltydog77 8 років тому +1

      mrcannfodder,smoking weed IS the zombie apocolypse

    • @b.a2921
      @b.a2921 8 років тому +2

      John Denver

    • @SupaBlank
      @SupaBlank 8 років тому +2

      Go Away
      holy shit your right, i forgot about those trainwrecks.

    • @5secondstudio771
      @5secondstudio771 8 років тому +4

      Actually he was parodying a Kurt Russell movie.

  • @UnderTheTableGremlin
    @UnderTheTableGremlin 4 роки тому +293

    “Next, drug addicts and alcoholics.”
    *The Gang Goes to Colorado*

  • @franciscooctavius5957
    @franciscooctavius5957 Рік тому +16

    I am so lucky to have been able to seen George during his later career. The man was an epic and unrelenting genius. The writing of his specials was and is second to none.

  • @mojojim6458
    @mojojim6458 6 років тому +287

    You move everybody out of Kansas. You give them a couple hundred dollars for the inconvenience. Brilliant.

  • @tarikay93
    @tarikay93 3 роки тому +285

    "You could outlaw religion and most of these sex crimes would disappear in a couple of generations, but we don't have time for rational solutions."
    I don't think people realize just how deep that sentence is.

    • @LexicalNoScope
      @LexicalNoScope 2 роки тому +17

      We could be just like North Korea 🇰🇵👍🏼

    • @cmecu_seemeseeyou9330
      @cmecu_seemeseeyou9330 2 роки тому +36

      Thats kind of silly because most sex crimes dont happen in religious circles. Many times the sex offenses are from the people who are closest to you, not someone who was already busted for something. Its normally a brother, a dad, a uncle , a grandfather, your best friend or neighbor.. those are the people to be weary of..

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 2 роки тому +21

      Usually the whole family goes to church

    • @cmecu_seemeseeyou9330
      @cmecu_seemeseeyou9330 2 роки тому +11

      @Spoiled Hu dikkat hai???? Yes really. Its not something I made, it is statisitcs, atleast for America. I cant speak for other countries. But here, its always someone close to the family, the victim knew the abuser, which most of the time is a family member. Not some person on some registry in the neighborhood.

    • @frankvonfrauner
      @frankvonfrauner 2 роки тому +10

      We're trying that right now, and it's not working, unfortunately.
      Instead of believing in a magical man in the sky, they believe their gender and sexuality is so unique and special that they desperately need children to validate them.
      No religion, no rules, no boundaries, the result is kids being desperately confused about everything and being convinced that the only path to salvation is through self-mutilation and sterilization.

  • @commodityjane
    @commodityjane 3 роки тому +38

    Brilliant delivery of a near perfect monologue. He must have had a photographic memory

  • @wakt21
    @wakt21 Рік тому +3

    George Carlin did make me laugh and chuckle but he was never one of those people who made me roar with laughter. Instead, most of the time, I'd be listening to him very carefully and then nodding my head in agreement. He always came across to me not as a comedian, but as a philosopher - kind of like a reincarnation of Plato or something.

  • @dale8809
    @dale8809 5 років тому +26

    God I freaking miss this guy. Makes me so sad he's gone.

  • @thenameless2379
    @thenameless2379 4 роки тому +50

    There is not one George Carlin stand-up that I do not find funny. And all this comedy is actually the truth in comedic form pure freaking genius George Carlin you need to come back.

    • @criztu
      @criztu 2 роки тому

      You are irrational. You're telling me you know the truth. God is the truth, you ignorant. Carlin was godless. he struggled with drugs and alcohols all his life, a slave to the Corporation.

    • @Raiden-the-Goat32
      @Raiden-the-Goat32 2 роки тому

      @@criztu Well I would not call an unproven hypothesis like god truth.
      Do you know why ?
      Considering you probably do not I will tell you.
      Simply put it need's confirmation and god has yet to be confirmed.
      Truth is Simply what ever the fact's are.
      Fact's are Simply what we have enough evidence to say is a fact.
      Example gravity is a fact.
      Another example is +2=4 is a fact.
      Another fact is you can stream TV show's on hulu.
      Calling an unproven god hypothesis Truth is to degrade the meaning to Truth.
      Infact it is to degrade the meaning to Truth so low that anything can classify as Truth when it has no Truth.
      With such definition to Truth being excepted I could come up with one just about as useful.
      Do you want to know what that is ?
      If so the answer is the pink leprechaun is Truth it is about as useful as calling an unproven god Truth.
      Considering 1 both the pink leprechaun and god are unproven currently.
      Is this to say a god or a leprechaun doesn't exist ?
      Well no it's not.
      What I am saying is if you try to use an unproven idea an act like that is true than you are lying.
      What if you turned out to be correct in the end ?
      Yet still that does not matter Considering when you made the claim it was true neither you nor anyone else had the proof to back it up.

    • @Raiden-the-Goat32
      @Raiden-the-Goat32 2 роки тому

      @@criztu You say " he struggled with drug's and alcohol all his life ".
      Okay when and where was this stated ?
      Furthermore using drug's and alcohol in and of itself is not a struggle.
      To struggle would imply he would
      1 over consume alcohol and drug's and 2 wanted to give it up.
      Finally 3 it would imply he could not give it up.
      Furthermore even if what you are saying about him being an alcoholic and drug addict was true this does not invalidate everything he say's.
      If you think it does you one do not know how logic and rationality work and lastly have a flawed methodology.

  • @elizabethferrier6429
    @elizabethferrier6429 4 роки тому +31

    Discovered this amazing man about 18 months ago. Now watching anything I can find. America, you had the best.

    • @danz58
      @danz58 2 роки тому +1

      if u know anything about american sports watch his comparison of baseball versus football. Classic.

  • @Unga_Bunga
    @Unga_Bunga 2 роки тому +23

    "We don't have time for rational solutions."
    Hey! That's my whole life in one sentence!

  • @eec589
    @eec589 6 років тому +74

    Hell, these ideas would've made a perfect sequel to "Escape from New York".

    • @98izzark69
      @98izzark69 5 років тому +1

      Have you seen Ghosts of Mars?

    • @eec589
      @eec589 5 років тому

      @@98izzark69 Now I will.

  • @natepark2973
    @natepark2973 8 років тому +365

    "A lot of tattoos, a lot of teeth broken off at the gumline. The True face of America."
    LMAO

  • @jerminator356
    @jerminator356 5 років тому +99

    RIP GEORGE 😢 you were one of a kind and the world is a lot less funny now

    • @Cazz8203
      @Cazz8203 4 роки тому +1

      kindly fuck off with your meaningless RIPs

    • @y7952
      @y7952 4 роки тому +2

      CazzSDMF he has good intentions with it, if you get so annoyed by it. Simply don’t transmit your feelings to others since it will only cause bad feelings and negativity

  • @georgejordan5611
    @georgejordan5611 Рік тому +8

    Side splitting humor! George Carlin always put me in tears with his comic delivery!

  • @10rrtyyssx769
    @10rrtyyssx769 2 роки тому +9

    This dude really is a master. Dark comedic and satirical storytelling at its finest

  • @bluerox3
    @bluerox3 8 років тому +205

    You know he basically describes Black Friday lines.

    • @bubbastill2040
      @bubbastill2040 5 років тому +2

      You just made me laugh out loud in April !

  • @brianblumenreich9026
    @brianblumenreich9026 2 роки тому +11

    George Carlin TRULY KNEW HIS WAY AROUND DIFFERENT SUBJECTS IN HIS STAND-UP ROUTINES!

  • @TheeKorovaMilkBar
    @TheeKorovaMilkBar 2 роки тому +24

    "The only things you give'em is lethal weapons and live ammunition...."
    "FUCK'EM!!!"
    "So they can communicate in a meaningful way."

  • @iheartchubbybellies
    @iheartchubbybellies 8 років тому +193

    Welcome to Kansas! I'd be happy to move out of this state to let people roam free. It'd be a better use for it than it's currently getting.

  • @topsouter
    @topsouter 2 роки тому +10

    This Guy was a true Master of Comedy.. took you on a walk with him for every joke and put 'life' in it's place.. loved him.. Ricky Gervais is the only one to come close for me.. raises a glass to George.. cheers!

    • @kenkaplan3654
      @kenkaplan3654 5 місяців тому

      Gervais who I like has gone off a cliff and likes to provoke without a point. I saw Carlin do that just once.

  • @danieljakubik3428
    @danieljakubik3428 Рік тому +42

    Legendary comedian George Carlin was a master of social commentary comedy.

    • @BA-de4pn
      @BA-de4pn Рік тому

      He hated liberals. Couldn't be to bad.

  • @BDBrawler77
    @BDBrawler77 Рік тому +3

    This is the best special he ever produced as far as I'm concerned that I love this one

  • @stefanandreipopa6681
    @stefanandreipopa6681 8 років тому +109

    Colorado actually sounds like a great time

    • @Gamerthinkersman
      @Gamerthinkersman 6 років тому +1

      stefan andrei Popa it really is

    • @jasonjames5292
      @jasonjames5292 6 років тому +1

      Is Trump going to have gates on the border

    • @Matanumi
      @Matanumi 6 років тому +1

      Until you open the gates...
      Shit they'd probably be partying with locals who never left and normals who fly in at all the ski resorts like Vile... they'll be the only. Desginated safe zones in the whole area

    • @BowzKnows
      @BowzKnows 5 років тому

      And they just legalized shrooms!

    • @sjjahoda5622
      @sjjahoda5622 5 років тому

      In reality it's true 😂

  • @jayakumar8294
    @jayakumar8294 4 роки тому +9

    The legend lives on the digital footprints. Don’t we all miss this genius?

  • @rustybeskar4664
    @rustybeskar4664 2 роки тому +22

    The longer I live, the more that George Carlin’s ideas start to makes sense.

  • @topnotch4564
    @topnotch4564 2 роки тому +8

    Earth was Blessed to have George Carlin, even for just a little while.

  • @halimahjedani7477
    @halimahjedani7477 8 років тому +454

    how strangely prophetic bout Colorado... ;-)

    • @TRVBAL
      @TRVBAL 8 років тому +27

      I was thinking the same thing!!!

    • @peteroz7332
      @peteroz7332 6 років тому +20

      Not prophetic => they watched his show and said 'good idea, why not, let's try it'

    • @rtaha93
      @rtaha93 6 років тому

      7

    • @kylealexander7893
      @kylealexander7893 5 років тому

      Halimah Jedani hahaha I know right?

    • @georgedoty-williams2085
      @georgedoty-williams2085 5 років тому +3

      But Colorado is quite decent and beautiful... take Nebraska instead

  • @Sylnaya
    @Sylnaya 5 років тому +13

    I miss George we need someone like him today so badly

  • @pedroking8202
    @pedroking8202 2 роки тому +23

    George Carlin is the most under rated comedian of all time for being a genius!!

    • @jerrygoldfarb7739
      @jerrygoldfarb7739 8 місяців тому +1

      Under rated? I disagree-any serious critic of people like him put him on Mt. Rushmore-he was a social/cultural critic using stand up as his delivery mechanism-saw a special about him recently and all the comedians without exception rated George as the greatest ever

  • @freindlycannuck1591
    @freindlycannuck1591 Рік тому +6

    Wow not only was he one of the top stand-up comics of his time but shit he could see in the future! Just an amazing man!

  • @ck4181
    @ck4181 3 роки тому +52

    Imagine if you were one of the lucky bastards to have been in the audience for this. R.i.p. George.

  • @iluvber247
    @iluvber247 6 років тому +6

    I'd be lying if I said I laughed a lot during that bit, but that was easily the most entertaining, impressive stretch I've seen from any comedian. And that's what makes Carlin one of the very best to ever do it.

  • @raylemieux3477
    @raylemieux3477 4 місяці тому +4

    Seen him live three times and never a disappointment ❤

  • @flyingleaf8929
    @flyingleaf8929 6 місяців тому +8

    What a great guy he was. Thank you for sharing your talent with us George. Nothing has changed you called out the Truth. R.I.P.

  • @hiy5088
    @hiy5088 3 роки тому +16

    Every country needs a person like him

  • @PawelAztec
    @PawelAztec 5 років тому +61

    I love the guy at 4:45 "that's me!" when Carlin speaks about maniacs.

  • @potiko16
    @potiko16 4 роки тому +15

    This is still one of the very best stand-up comedy bits ever.

  • @honestone490
    @honestone490 2 роки тому +9

    I think every US President needs an advisor like George Carlin. Someone who can keep the President well grounded and off kilter at the same time.

  • @Naruto4life3D2Y
    @Naruto4life3D2Y 4 роки тому +5

    Man this dude was unfiltered gold. Every line was very intelligent and very blunt. Gotta love it

  • @ZubairKhan-vs8fe
    @ZubairKhan-vs8fe 5 років тому +44

    This gated fenced off criminals is actually a brilliant idea. I'd pay to watch this on tv

    • @anomous2307
      @anomous2307 5 років тому +2

      ever hear of a prison?

  • @digimaks
    @digimaks 3 роки тому +16

    Carlin literally described how things are- the reality, which many people fail to acknowledge! And he predicted plenty of things!

  • @erikahentschke5208
    @erikahentschke5208 5 місяців тому +2

    So astute, so memorable, wonderful ideas, sadly missed.

  • @jonathancooney8855
    @jonathancooney8855 8 років тому +371

    4:45 George Carlin: The ones who live out where the buses dont run "That's me" lol

    • @TRVBAL
      @TRVBAL 8 років тому +4

      lol I heard that too ha.

    • @arcad1an292
      @arcad1an292 8 років тому

      Heard it too

    • @bbjornst07
      @bbjornst07 8 років тому +13

      This is where the majority of America lives! Okay, maybe not majority, but lets face it. All those that vote for Donald Trump live in this area.

    • @russelloriely6343
      @russelloriely6343 8 років тому +15

      as opposed to the ones that vote for clinton?
      he may be an ass but at least he isn't a total wack job.

    • @dougfoston4578
      @dougfoston4578 8 років тому +2

      BINGO