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they stopped giving out ADD/ADHD medications because it got proven ADD/ADHD doesnt exist now it gets called ODD and why the children get off the medication at 18 they sometimes give a placebo to autistic people because lets face it autism is ADD/ADHD with the exception of hypomania being called it and a few other things
as someone with ADHD who was always told i was “wasting my potential” with my laziness, this video gave me a sort of inner peace, like healing a wound that’s been open for a really long time. thanks sm kati!!
It has been similar for me. For most of my childhood and college life, I thought I was just lazy and a procrastinator. I didn't know it was ADHD. (Diagnosed 4 yrs ago) This has helped in continuing to change my negative self talk that plagued me as well.
ADD/ADHD as far as i know doesnt exist because there are 0 tests for it my guess you more likely have autism and the adorol works great for autistic people but from any test i ever heard of to diagnosis ADD/ADHD everybody in the entire world has it including the curmudgeon dave koller from TYT because he never finished reading a manual or something like that
Honestly, I've learned that my ADHD, depression, anxiety and procrastination issues are all so intertwined that it doesn't make much practical sense to try to unravel them. Unmanaged attentional issues cause anxiety. The anxiety becomes a barrier to getting things done. Too much anxiety for too long leads to a depressive episode. Depression will cause negative thinking, self-criticism, physical inertia and worsened attentional difficulties until ... Anxiety strikes about everything not getting done, then avoidance of the amxiety is encouraged by the negativistic thinking of the depressive mood. If there depression lifts, you're back to square one. Rinse and repeat the cycle.
Can we just face the fact that no one is inherently lazy, that there's always a bunch of psychological and/or physical at play? I feel like I'm constantly chasing acknowledgement; whether through a diagnosis or not, I'm desperate to find justification for my limitations. The truth is, I can't be "happy and successful (financially)" in today's culture and economy, where we expect people to be super-productive and that this productivity has to be "in demand". It's like, I have to choose between ignoring my limits now and unrealistically hope to retire comfortably later, or give up and struggle to survive for the rest of my days.
Yes exactly. I struggle the same thing. People thing I am lazy but the truth is that my energy drains so fast and I can't even find a job beacuse working so fast eight hours every day is just too much for my body.
This makes so much sense. I've always been known for an extremely hard worker at any job I do. I clean houses on the side for extra cash and can get through a house fast and do a perfect job yet I continually struggle to keep my own home clean and it continually stresses me out!
Many house cleaners suffer same. Many chefs hate to cook at home. Many office workers hate to open mail and answer phones at home. It's a real thing...
You come home to relax not to do the same thing as you do for work, it may sound ironic but it would help if you hire a cleaner once in a while to clean yours and ask your friends to come over for a glass of wine to organize your closet. I don’t have ADHD but I did work as a house cleaner, the last thing I wanted to do is clean my own home on a weekend when everyone else are enjoying their precious family time.
I totally resonate with your comment!! As someone who has ADHD, it’s always harder to clean/organize my life/apartment than it is to want to help someone else tackle their organization piles!! I’m really struggling with my space lately! Mostly the motivation like she mentioned here! At least we’re not alone in our struggles! And I’ve found that if I pair a task that’s not exciting to me( like cleaning or organizing) with something that makes me happy like listening to a funny podcast/music then I’m more likely to enjoy it more! We gotta trick our brains to get motivated!👌👍hope it helps!!
Or years after cleaning the same things from other people in the home, you just dread when its all out of place again, like crumbs all over the place. Why cant they even wipe the counter for themselves, lol.. You clean the floor to stay clear, then next thing to notice is 20 things all over the floor again,errrr..
I'm 36, diagnosed within the past 2 years with ADHD and PTSD. I havent been able to get the appropriate treatment to figure it all out yet, but as someone who's parents say "you're fine", "suck it up and move on", or "I think your Dr is f*#&ing you up", watching some of your videos and being able to relate feels like being able to take a deep breath after being stuck under water.
I am 39, not officially diagnosed yet, but the signs have been there since I was a child. My parents refused to get me tested even though my teachers requested it - said I was just a normal kid and they were bad teachers/school environments weren't conducive to my age group. Neglecting to take into account everything I ever got in trouble for was related to forgetfulness/"laziness". Fast forward however three decades later, I've been doing a lot of research trying to figure out how/why my brain works the way it does - and surprise! My Dad has EVERY symptom of ADHD also. No wonder he doesn't believe in it and thought there was nothing weird about the way I was/am. 😅 He's the same way
I'm 44 diagnosed with ADHD combined type and according to the doctor one of the most extreme cases she's ever seen. My parents are the same way so I just didn't tell them. My small circle of grinds and my hubby are my support.
Totally! @ Casey Hage !! It does feel like taking a deep breath after being stuck under water 💦 what a smart analogy!!! How did you actually get diagnosed, from your primary doctor or does it have to be a psychiatrist?? I can’t seem to get into see a psychiatrist in my area😫 but, I know how you’re feeling I’m 45 and just kinda figured this out on my own a year ago via UA-cam videos and googling symptoms!! It helps to have a name for it… and not to feel like I was the only adult who doesn’t know how to adult!! I’m sorry your parents have been so dismissive though! That’s hurtful😓 at least you can feel good that you’ve sought out the help you deserve!!!! Way to go!! And welcome to ADHD tribe, we’re all pretty awesome peeps 🙌🏼💜💚💜
I’ve always felt I’m lazy and unorganised and I’m not doing nothing to change it so it’s my fault and then when Depression sets in everything just feels so much worse - I think you can do it because when you have no choice and the deadline is there I do it so must be lazy - also with someone helping overseeing I can understand and do it - but hearing this video makes me feel less shitty about myself thank you Katie as always your videos are healing peoples self critics - helping us be more compassionate to ourselves so we can love ourselves a little more !! ❤️ x
I'm not diagnosed with ADHD but this video really resonated with me. i've noticed that my anxiety and perfectionism is what prevents me from getting started on tasks even things I think are fun
Definitely helps reminding myself to take small/baby steps first. Especially when I want my self care routine to be “perfect”. I struggle with perfection a lot of the times.
I needed this video this morning! I started a new job yesterday, a pretty intense job, and there was A LOT to take on yesterday. Luckily my team seems very supportive and I can even bring up this video with them, but I haven't been sleeping well the past couple nights, thinking about all my tasks and responsibilities, but I need to e realistic about what I can do each day and minimize my perfectionist qualities, set goals, and not get overwhelmed by tasks that seem tedious and not let them lag behind and be honest with myself and my team about how I can achieve and orchestrate my tasks successfully while juggling work life balance. Thanks Katie!
Urgency is something I didn't even realise I was using: I'll make a fake event so that I have a deadline before I need to do something else, just so I can say "Okay, I've gotta go to the grocery store in 20mins, I gotta get this done before I go!" - even though I've made up the time for the grocery store, so it's not really a deadline
As a teacher I try to make sure that my students with ADHD that I'm not trying to fix them because they're not broken. I also tell them that we need to find tools to cope with the challenges because they are not going to grow out of it. It's always amazing how many assignments get turned in when I have the student do a bag or locker dump. A lot of the work is already done, but the executive function to turn stuff in is missing. I encourage the students to just do a bag dump every Friday.
As someone with ADHD, Dysthymia and chronic pain, I struggle with multiple things: Motivation Energy Bad Brain Days Bad Pain Days And it helped me to get used to the thought: productivity isn't the goal, living comfortable is.
I’ve never heard of dysthymia so I looked it up! Thanks for teaching me something new 🥰😘😘 I didn’t know that even had a name! I thought it was just persistent depression, I’ve had depression since a kid too and I’m on antidepressants for life, I still have some severe dips but thankfully since I got the right meds they’re pretty rare, I do have a lot of little down days still though, I hope yours is in a better place for you! ❤️❤️❤️😘😘xxxx
I can't even remotely count how often I've been told or people made me feel like I'm lazy and not working hard enough. Even people that love me and want the best for me and thought that it was just a reality and there was just nothing that could be done about that. But it always made me feel like I'm just a bad person and not like acceptance in any shape or form. In the end what it did was, that I "accepted" myself as lazy and gave up on everything, not even urgency could do anything to motivate me. Because bad, lazy people don't do things. So why would I? It took years of therapy to get rid of this horribly damaging belief and I'm so happy that my therapist realised that this was what crippled my ability to make progress in life.
I have ADHD and generalized anxiety disorder, so I procrastinate for everything you mentioned... I work well under pressure, or at least I used to. Lately, working on my master's degree has found me staring at my computer for hours unable to get started, because I have perfectionist tendencies and fear I'm not going to do the assignment right. School used to be easy for me, but it isn't anymore.
Going through this while doing undergrad and it's so freaking daunting and terrifying that my grades are affected only because of turning in my work late😭
Thank you for making this video❤ I’m dealing with a cocktail of ADHD, C-PTSD, chronic sleep disorders, fatigue and pain - and using the four factors you are talking about has certainly helped me. The best way for me to get by is to try and be gentle with myself, and accept that though I'm ambitious and a recovering perfectionist, I can't always live up to my own or others expectations. The lack of energy is the thing I’m mostly bothered by, and it’s really causing a lot of frustration for me. If I’m extremely low on energy, I can’t do much else than rest for as long as it takes for my body to regain enough energy so that I can function just a little bit again. It can take days and weeks and even months if it's really bad.
Just the video I needed to help me push through my online courses. I got up early and just made coffee so I can take on the day. I know this motivation won’t last but this year I want to finally get it right. Thankfully I finally got ADHD support as well. Thanks Kati!
That's brilliant! Yes, I feel that the video is helping as well; even just with understanding and acceptance. Like mentioning the large to do list! I do one of these most days!!! And almost always don't get through them all!!! Setting urgency/timers/deadlines is definitely helpful! I do this too, but not enough. I shall try to implement this. Thank you!
I was diagnosed with ADHD this year, at the ripe old age of 31! I've been watching your content for years, Kati! I'm so glad to see you cover ADHD in your thorough and compassionate "Kati style". Love from Australia! 🇦🇺
I have struggled with motivation my entire life. When I was in university, I was focused but I struggled to learn. I was constantly bullied as a child with words like, 'you will never succeed, you are not smart enough, you are stupid, and you will never accomplish the goals you want. In short, I was told by my Dad that I was garbage and I grew up with a deep sense of self-hate. This problem has caused so many problems for me. I wish parents would stop bullying their kids. They have no idea about the harm it causes. I have participated in mental health courses to improve my mental health and I have heard many people talk about the negative effects of bullying. Can we all just agree that bullying is harmful enough to be called a threat to our brain health and mental well-being?
I’ve never really been told that I’m lazy or a procrastinator per se but I’ve definitely always been told that my brain is going too fast, especially too fast for my hands so my handwriting is god awful etc, I definitely do procrastinate though, I’m struggling so much with executive dysfunction lately too! 😩
I'm Autistic and I procrastinate a lot. My therapist explained it's because I get too anxious to start the task. Perfectionism and lack of energy are also big reasons why I procrastinate.
Something that I've found is that there is a time factor anxiety mixed with perfectionism - can't start because I know how long it will take, and in the back of my mind I feel guilty like I should be doing something else. Unless I have the peace of mind to solely focus without guilt and enjoy the process, then I may as well not start at all. Ironically, when I finally get around to it I somehow get pulled away by other people.
Great video - thank you. However, wonder about depression and where that fits in. When I am stuck, I ponder if is it ADHD, procrastination or depression as to why tasks are so hard to start and complete. Thumbs UP!
Thanks for mentioning that!! Yes depression can steal our motivation too, and it can be hard to untangle where it comes from. When battling depression the best thing we can do (if we are able) is to do what's called behavioral activation, which really just means that we should push ourselves to start doing something we used to like. That can make us feel slightly better, and accomplished. xoxo
Thank you for the video, Kati! I'm struggling a lot these past few months.I have no motivation at all and hardly feel like getting out of bed. I'm anxious about the future in every way. I want to move out of the country, but as you said, the "reward is too far out". Thus, I need to get a job here first, but I'm scared of job interviews, I can't stand talking to people without freaking out. Getting out of my comfort zone gives me anxiety and I'm so afraid of failing miserably in the given role. Why is life so complicated?
Kati .. your videos take from me triple times that it is original times, because I have to stop and write down some really good notes that pops up to my mind after hearing and listening to your words. Thanks
Thank you, Katie! What helps me (sometimes, definitely not always) is tell myself I only do 5 minutes. Or for my writing or business administration: I'll just write something down and see how it goes. It doesn't need to make sense, just words, write them down. Because I need to wake up my brain and tbh my brain is either racing (towards something non urgent but novel) or sleeping. Once I sit down to write, I eventually wake up and continue. Its the getting started that's the worst for me. Overwhelm, perfectionism and so on. For cleaning I watch shows like hoarders. Watching others clean (and scream) helps me get motivated. I also use the flylady system! Do something small every day instead of crash and burn after hours of cleaning. And meds, I need my meds! ♥️
You are amazing and your videos often hit on the exact topic I need at that point in my life. Your hard work and information is very much appreciated by myself and I'm sure others out here! Thank you!
Thanks so much for creating this video! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year at 32 years old (after years of wondering and self-doubt) and I feel so often that it's a mix of not having the motivation to do what needs to get done on short term issues, and procrastination on longer term projects. I've found that chunking things down into much smaller steps has helped me out tremendously, but I still find myself occasionally in that space where I am missing the "motivational puzzle piece" that is keeping me from moving forward in a process or project, and I then try to reach out and feel around until I find the piece that fits and keeps me moving forward, or stop that "thing" I'm doing and regroup later.
Oh Kati, thank you so much for your content! I am struggling with procrastination since school, currently with writing my thesis...and having depression. Unfortunately I didn't find any way around it yet. Even though thinking of small bites of a big task, the awareness of the big task and the likely critism by others drains my whole energy.
I think this video is amazing as a limited introduction to some of the issues people with ADHD face! however there is the opportunity for a real risk of harm being created by this this video as a result of a theraputic practitioner with a large platform failing to address the physical component to executive dysfunction. When caused by the brain being structured differently (this is common) the strategies suggested are not resolutions. This is part of the common misinformation referenced in the introduction. ADHD is often incorrectly listed as a learning disability (IQ below 70) When actually it is categorically a learning DIFFICULTY (still a disability that affects learning but does not result in low IQ) ADHD falls into the same category as Dyslexia. The dysfunction is permenant and not removable. Eecutive dysfunction is also commonly found in traumatic brain injury. What actually helps is coming to terms with your disability and learning how to live the best life YOU can based on your individual capabilities. Therapy can help with this process but has limitations. In the same way therapy is not delivered as the primary treatment for restoration of brain functioning after a horrible accident , it is also not the cure for executive dysfunction stemming from a congenital difference in brain structure. If you are a neurodivergent reading this searching for answers/instructions/ the thing that will fix you and allow you to be happy, Hear me. What you are experiencing is not in your head, not your fault and probably not something you can change. Misinformation is everywhere. let go of what you're told is required for worthy existence. The same people responsible for your trauma and alienation are the ones convincing you the answer to your suffering is for you to "fix yourself" They are broken. They are wrong. They failed. Not you. There is nothing about you that ever needed to be healed.
I've suspected for a long time that I have ADHD (have never gone to get diagnosed for that) and nearly everything that was talked about in this video is what I've dealt with, and continue to deal with, on a daily basis. Feels very validating as my family always called me lazy and I know I can be at times but it's far more than that.
This does need to be heard by more. It took me way too long to get diagnosed and my "prime" years i kinda feel were wasted by not having help because people just didn't see the signs that this was a neurological issue and not just me "being lazy".
I have MDD and PDD and anxiety, and I’m horrible about procrastinating. The fear of failure, not seeing into the future, perfectionism, and anxiety are dead on the reasons I procrastinate. I never use to be this way either, and I’ve always struggled with depression and anxiety. I use to get assignments done a week or two ahead of time. Now I wait until the very last second, and I DO NOT work well under pressure.
I use the analogy of a dead car battery. We can have a thought to do something; that’s turning the key. The procrastination or AD[H]D Is the dead battery, the inability to turn over to start the car.
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age and this perfectly explains problems I've been dealing with for my entire life and especially so now in grad school. I particularly relate to the information you talk about when it comes to anxiety and perfection. This video was eye opening and I hope I can put some of your tips into action to make tasks that seem daunting much more approachable. I'm happy that I found this channel through YMH and Christina P.
I have always had an issue with procrastination- my earliest memories of it go back to early elementary school. When I was in my spring semester of my sophomore year of college, it got REALLY bad: every long weekend as well as spring break got "robbed" from me because I was constantly playing catch-up on the work I had chosen to avoid doing when it was assigned. It was THE WORST. For fall semester of my junior year, I was resolved not to let it get that bad again, so I kept an agenda for about the first month of school until the accountability made me feel more stressed than the procrastination itself. Procrastination still shows itself to me now (fifteen years later), and thankfully it isn't with catastrophic things. To-do lists are definitely a helpful reminder about what needs to get done.
A really good discussion on procrastination. I think breaking tasks into small parts is a good idea. Being physically fit and exercising will give you energy and strength for the day. Also, if you can create a list of reasons to complete a task then that will motivate you to finish the task. Write a list of compelling reasons or benefits to complete the task. When you know there is a strong reason to work hard, then you work hard and finish tasks.
As a person struggling with ADHD since I was 9yrs old (I'm 42 now) and still struggling (but with the luxury of inner peace, thankfully), thank you Kati. 🙏🤗😉🇧🇷
Same. I'm 37 and @times worry about the "how the fuck can this have lasted since I was a child" line of thoughts. So.. inner peace just always seems so far away unless I literally talk myself out of it.
@@EMdemo it took me a long time to accept myself as I am (not as efficient as other people and on top of that, not understood by friend and family, AKA lazy or victim). Thankfully I'm an introvert, so if they don't care I make do with the company of my cats and dogs. That's how I found some degree of inner peace. EMdemo, I truly wish you the best and that you find means to cultivate your inner peace as well. Best wishes and take good care of yourself. 😉😉🤗🤗
Thank you! Struggling with this! The brain is on or off, really annoying. Diagnosed now at 48 (!) and all my strategies has been worn out. I can’t seem to trick myself to do things. I can see trough my self’-manipulation. So now it’s kind of meta - I have to trick myself that I don’t trick myself in order to make myself doing stuff… it’s tiring! Thanks for your pod! It’s a lifesaver! ✨🎈✨
I have ADHD and I find that by setting goals in my life. I set goals that I can perseverate on. I think I do this because I kind of become addicted to the dopamine hit so to speak. I am physically disabled so I struggle with doing my physical therapy exercises. But when I don't do them my joints hurt more.
Thank you Kati I have been struggling with it,it has brought so many proplems specially in school I left the school and transformed to a military night school .during college I toke medicine and a lot of sessions praise to Allah I have never faced any problems because of it during college.I hate to remember it it was igony.
I was a young girl around the time when it was extremely rare that girls could be diagnosed with ADHD as well as boys. Though I felt like something was different about me growing up, I was always gaslit out of my belief by everyone around me, every time I brought it up to an adult or a friend, and was always dismissed with a larger amount of guilt than I had before for being lazy, or seemingly anxious for no reason. I have been struggling now as a young adult in the world, especially economically. As I've learned more about ADHD I've come to realize I relate to almost every single symptom, and though I'm not officially diagnosed, I feel comfortable labeling myself this way for now. I don't have health insurance and live in the U.S. so I just wanted to say these videos are like a lifeboat to those of us young adults out here who can't afford to be seen by a professional, but are really struggling and need help. 🖤 Thanks so much for the effort you put into these helpful and knowledgeable videos!! They give me faith and relief to know that my experience is the norm for many people, and that there's hope for my struggling brain, and ways to cope with how it works 🖤
I set 20 minute timers and just work on that dreaded thing for 20 minutes. I usually reset the timer a few times and then BOOM!...I've made significant progress on that project.
I have a question because I relate with a lot of adhd symptoms and alot of advice given for adhd viewer is helpful to me but when i asked to be diagnosed by a previous therapist he said he didnt think i have adhd because im too functioning. Aside two or three times i always make it to work most therapy appointment at the time and things like that. At this point i do have a planner i use on and off. im sure youd probably need more information but is it possible to only experience system in certain areas of life, for me cleaning up my apartment and making sure my dishes and laundry are done have been a real big struggle and when i experience most system. i did relate to the functioning with urgency portion of the video you mentioned because i have anxiety about missing work alot
I am a procrastinator AND it’s adhd, lol. What helps is checking for body needs (including meds!), making sure I am clear on the first two smallest possible actions towards doing the thing, coworking with a friend on zoom, and sometimes setting a timer to just work on it for 20 minutes and then I can stop. What doesn’t work is berating myself in my head, and any productivity advice aimed at neurotypicals based around planning and prioritizing and scheduling.
Medication has helped me tremendously! I wasn't diagnosed until I was 30 and I can't tell you how many doors have opened up because I can now focus and complete tasks in a timely manner!
One thing that helps with putting thing off is I do 30 minutes of the project then 30 minutes of something fun as well as music helps my motivation cause I can’t really find the motivation
I REALLY wish you were my personal therapist 😞 I have BPD, bipolar 2, cptsd, panic disorder, gad, and health anxiety and I struggle with finding a therapist that I can get along with and that doesn't make me feel shitty after seeing them. You explain things in a way that is easy to understand while giving ways to help without judgement. Just being a borderline patient alone causes attitude from most therapists I see especially being a low income patient. I wish more therapists were like you and strongly considering moving to wherever you are (not actually going to and not trying to be creepy 😆) just to get good therapy. Ty for your time with your videos! It's appreciated more than I can explain in words 💜
Yep, I'm struggling with depression, ADHD, and procrastination. Especially, tasks I do not want to do, like having to call people I don't know personally. In my household, I keep putting tasks off out of fear of failure. My mobility is low, I need a walker outdoors and crutches in my flat. My wishful thinking revolves around a flat that's always clean and presentable, no physical strain necessary. I hate physical strain. Anything that requires physical activity, be it sports or a deep clean is clearly a no-can-do. You might be able to persuade me if I knew for sure I would have to do it only once and never again. Yes, I know there is the KonMari method and a few others, and I was able to sort out clothes, books, and documents. Then the motivation bubble collapsed. It is still lying there, no air.
Exactly. Maybe the whole world has ADD based on the lack of dopamine to get us to finish tasks we don’t like. So people without ADD don’t need to trick or reward ourselves to do unwanted tasks? LMAO. Currently I am procrastinating on cleaning my basement flooded by my fa,ily dumping things there. I don’t have the dopamine to carry out this cleaning task. Wait, I think I have ADD.
I've found that being kind to myself, gamifying mundane tasks, and keeping fast-acting methods at work that push dopamine and norepinephrine can be really helpful. Like a lot of acupuncturists, I'm self-employed, so being my own boss does allow me the luxury of keeping a guitar (an unamplified electric, so it's not loud), kettlebell, and a huge collection of books on meditation and qigong in my back office. When I'm having difficulty doing something mundane, a few kettlebell swings, some qigong, or a couple of minutes of guitar can give a bit of a push if I need one. Aside from that, I don't let myself start certain admin tasks (like paperwork) before 11am. That seems to be the sweet spot for me for fully engaging in the most mundane parts of work. I really lack dimmer switches on my focus, so if I'm not fully engaged in a task, it will take me a really long time to get it done. I feel like timing tasks in a way that fits our own brain architecture can make such a difference...and on that note, the "do the most difficult thing first" piece of common advice is not very helpful for me. I need a few minor wins before the difficult thing comes up.
Hey Kati, thank you so much for your content! It has truly been a sanity saver for me. You put my mind at ease day after day after day. I don’t know where to go to ask you a question so I’m hoping that here is ok. Do you think you could make a video on migraines and mental health and if there is a connection there? I have suffered terrible migraines since I was 9 years old. They gave me a lot of anxiety and caused me to become avoidant. Plus I developed OCD tendencies (not sure if that’s related) but it was truly traumatic in my youth especially. I had all the symptoms: nausea, aura, dysphasia, complete numbness on one side of the body etc. etc. I would get them as often as every 2 weeks and sometimes they would last for up to 5 days, reoccurring. It made me hyper vigilant and I am already highly sensitive and rejection sensitive. I also developed and eating disorder (which I believe to be connected). These days (at 36) I have the migraines mostly managed but I’m only now realising how my mental health has suffered and so I’m out to find out as much information as I can. I want to know which most likely came first, the anxiety? Or the migraines? Can you help?
I've never been diagnosed but I know I am or I'm on the autistic spectrum...At school I was often in a dream world of my own..I would get obsessed with things and then discard them completely..I would get lost on school trips etc or would fall behind in maths or science classes etc..I was often branded as a bit stupid by other kids or the teachers would say I was lazy..I would often over compensate by being the class clown etc...I would also be and still am in some respects a people pleaser and never really knew who I was.. As I got older I'd forget where I parked my car or lose concentration whilst driving or even crash as I was concentrating on something else..I also noticed I drank to access and took other recreational substances and would be hyper sometimes and out of control...I always knew something was wrong..I'd adopted lots of habits from childhood to deal with stress like biting my nails or picking my nose etc..I had bad negative self asteem etc I can be a perfectionist at times or I can completly put off tasks that I need to do where I literally can't be bothered to do a mundane task etc...My GP has told me it takes years to get a diagnoses in the UK..
Thank you Kati, I've watched several of your clips over the last year or so. But the latest ones feel like they are the universe saying "Here you go, this is some information you needed but didn't know you needed it". I have ADHD and suffer from procrastination as well, but it was the Childhood Emotional Neglect clip that rocked me to my core, I have suffered from Dysthymia for most of my life an been in and out of mental hospitals for nearly a decade and have had way to many MDD episodes to keep count. Over the last 10 years I have done a lot of self-examination/self-reflection and have gotten a fair idea of my negative self-beliefs and self-talk, and how they talk/feed in to each other. As I watched and processed the Childhood Emotional Neglect clip, it was like a light had been turned on and it allowed me to see where the beliefs had come from. Thank you Kati for all you do, and for helping me to have a massive breakthrough and unlock more of my mental health. Chris PS currently in hospital for MDD again but always trying to get the little bit better than yesterday.
@@louiserothman6566 The Childhood Emotional Neglect clip is here :>> ua-cam.com/video/q7Nlxwgy79U/v-deo.html Hope it helps and sorry for the delay n getting back to you.
As someone with nonverbal learning disorder and ADHD this makes a lot of sense. I have so much difficulty completing the project management tasks at work because i have to keep jumping through folders to get to them. I then have to scroll through and find something else. It makes me so mad that my work is set up for neurotypicals, and i always get frustrated trying to finish my tasks because of how many friggin folders i have to jump through. I feel seen
Thank you for the video reminding me to finish my Innerchild workshop homework Kati. At least me overscheduling these days has been in favor of my schoolwork for the most part. I'm proud of myself for that.
Ok miss muscle mommy!!! I’m sorry I clicked because your arm looked so jacked in the thumbnail and as a bonus I was able to learn about ADHD! Thank you
I think I missed the point of the video. The title says "ADHD *OR* Procrastination" however, all of the factors Katie mentioned were a mix of both conditions and procrastination was also a symptom of ADHD. So how do I know if what I am struggling with is just your run of the mill procrastination or if its ADHD and I should get extra help?
To add to this: I watched a video on TikTok where someone talked about INCUP for adhd. INCUP stands for Interest, Novelty, Competition/Challenge, Urgency, and Pressure. Just a few more things that might help someone with their adhd brain.
So very validating.... I totally used to not want to leave my house until after my amazing therapist physically took me to mental health LNP and got me evaluated . I definitely have come a long way with the right meds but processing time is still so hard. So some times I don't know if I'm late because I'm procrastinating or I'm in a time fog. Timers for everything but what 5mins feels like for me is still not the reality of 5mins. Lol I tell people to literally lie to me if they want me there on time. Its at 6 pm but really it starts at 7:30pm . It actually does work lol
Hi Katie, thank u so much for all your wonderful videos, they’ve been really helping me a lot? I was wondering if u could make a video about autism and ways to know if you have it? Because I think I might be Thanks!
Sometimes I tell myself "Your future self is going love it when this is done." I also tell myself sometimes "Doing X is self care." It doesn't always work but it does some of the time.
Hi Kati! Thank you so much for this video. Really helpful. ❤ Just want to ask, aside from the things you mentioned in the video, when do you think someone should consult a therapist about having ADHD symptoms? Thanks in advance! 🥰
I have to do a project for college that is working against me in every single one of the four factors, and even beyond them. It also plays right into my social anxiety, and so much more. I have done nothing, the deadline is tomorrow, and I will fail. There is no way in hell this could have gone any other way. It has happened before, and it will happen again just like this, without me being able to put up a fight. It's just how I am.
One thing that works well for me: if I do not want to do a set of tasks because of these kinds of reasons, I always do something fun first. Either my favorite task or something smalls that gives me a small dopamine boost. Also, with tasks that are too boring (like doing the dishes) I always make sure to pair it with something more stimulating. I have found that podcasts or documentaries stimulate me enough to do the boring task on the side
The motivation issue is a huge problem for me in that I have problems getting motivated for even those things I WANT to do. Which is why I have 100’s of books that haven’t been read yet and I haven’t been able to write with any consistency in years. Specialists are stretched to the breaking point, which is why it’s hard getting help. ‘Fabulous’ sounds good but I’m afraid it’s just going to be something else I spend money on only to not use it because it’s not quite what I need. I’m in a bit of a struggle. 🤷🏻♀️
10:00 people are able to memorize long soliloquies or hundreds of digits of pi thanks to chunking. I wonder if we can treat tasks like that and increase the size of our To Do lists. Like, group "sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor, wipe down and clean out fridge, run and empty dishwasher, wipe down cupboards and counters" into just "clean kitchen"
What always puzzled me was, why I cannot get the motivation to do the things, that I actually really enjoy doing? If it just was something I hated doing, then it would make sense.
I just got diagnosed with ADHD. and through this process, I’m having doubts, like maybe it’s not ADHD but it’s just a lot of anxiety. So every time I’ve been doing a task since then, I realize that I am really anxious about not being able to get it done correctly so I avoided. And I go do some thing that just makes me feel better. But it’s confusing because more often than not I tune out or want to do like five different things at the same time.
Hello! i'm someone whose been quite associated with mental problems already and im here like trying to know about amother disorder like what the f am i collecting these bunch of sickness and it makes me feel weird but still i just wanna make sure. one thing to note, i have ocd. and nonetheless i have problems with trying to differentiate ADHD with plain laziness. for example, i am also that kind of person who puts off work for several days or so when in reality i know i can do that work even less than half a day. i also know in myself that i am much more capable of always making outstanding outputs (at least this is what i thought of). i know if i just work on this if i just truly devote and focus on this, i know i can do a great job. but doing it and starting it just seems real challenging. i also have a hard time multi tasking. for example, when i decide to work on my study loads, then I MUST WORK NONSTOP. once i go out of my room or even do other things which requires me to go out of my freaking room, or even just take a break with substantial time, i just know it will ruin my moment. i think it is rlly inconvinient because not at all times i can just stay in my room, sometimes i rlly need to go out etc. but i can't and i shouldn't because that would ruin the current situation or condition i barely managed to place myself in. another example! sometimes i even put off going to the restroom because i'm afraid it will ruin the glimpse of hard work i tried so hard to achieve. heck, i dont even eat outside my room because i have problem with consistency and HONESTLY idk what's my freaking problem. oftentimes it's also because of my rituals which takes sm time that's why i just want to avoid moving a lot from my desk. it is indeed frustrating. not to mention all the rituals, obsessive actions, and instrusive thoughts trying to come all at once every minute every second i breathe so idk rlly. does these things have to do with ADHD? actually, i don't think i have ADHD but i'm just asking because i don't know this disorder well. and like my ocd, tricho as well excoriation went along for like my whole life before i discovered such "thing" exists with other ppl. HOPE U COULD ANSWER MY INQUIRIES! Have a good day! 🔥☔
For a while I used to set up a routine on Alexa and it would play music for exactly 30 minutes and that was the motivation time to get up and clean the kitchen
I have add but paired along with ocd ptsd and schizoaffective - it does feel painful to do things. I suffer from black and white thinking it’s either going to be perfect or it’s not happening. I hate it but I’m happy I downloaded the app. I’m going to try and stick to it.
I wanted to say that even though I didn't stick with Fabulous in the long run, I did find it really useful to condition some routines into my day and they did stick 👌 (I'm ADHD/Autistic)
I went to get evaluated by a neuropsychologist because my therapist said I seemed like I could have ADHD. She found it is all GAD, no ADHD. Procrastination... Yeah.... Anxiety... Yup. It was great to have that diagnosis though. My doctor added Buspar to my Zoloft, and it's only been a few months... But hey, feels like it's helping. Thanks for all your informative videos, Kati. Always nice to know I'm not the only one who feels certain ways! ☺
Do you mind if I ask how they are able to diagnose adhd and generalized anxiety disorder differently? I feel like there’s a lot of overlap. How I know it’s not just anxiety for me is because the 4 SSRIs I’ve been on made basically no difference
I just wait until a wave of “oooh, want to do that now” hits me, and I roll with it. Making myself do things NOW using almost any trick leave me feeling tired and resentful. I just need a domamine drip.
There is also many who simply see themselves as 'superior' to others and do even want to give time to those with ADHD or any other so called 'weaknesses'. Nobody is 'perfect'. Everyone is different. It's very important to show 'respect' for and to others in a non judgemental manner. I trust that many will gain a true understanding of ADHD and not use this knowledge as a way to 'control' manipulate or bully those living with ADHD. Mutual respect needs to be present in all environments including the work and home environment. If you 'care' for others you should care to respect 'who' they are and be a true friend to them, not someone who laughs at them behind their back.
If you are not a qualified Doctor, then 'self medication' is a dubious route to follow. We all have 'unique' individual requirements. A fully qualified Doctor in whatever field they practice and if a consultant in this field has gained years and years of experience. They are also held accountable for what they say and what they proscribed. The world is full of 'half penny' Doctors. 'Paper never refused ink'. Health Professionals are 'Health Professionals'. The Royal Colleges set a high standard both of entry requirements and standards required to practice. The medical professional in the United Kingdom are world class Professionals in whatever field they practice.
The biggest one for me is my depression hole. It's huge. And I know they're are broken, damaged, irreversibly dirty things buried in it. Plus the insurmountable energy required to clean it all, and the pain that's to come join in, and make me feel pathetic. I was already weak and stupid before, but covid took me down to half that... I can't stand/ bend, my depression is worse than ever, and I just have no energy, even worse than before. And now I've finally gotten a job, my first since February. I want to crochet when I get home, but I just can't moved once I'm at down 😭 I feel so lazy.... like such a waste.... and then I look at the disgusting mess I created and what a horrible person I am...
Thank you for this, my son really struggles and sleeps a lot of the time. He finds motivation very difficult. Here in Britain there seems to be no help what so ever. He is 21 now and didn't finish school because he became very depressed aged 14 and tried to take his life on several occasions. He was diagnosed with adhd aged 18. I have just no idea how to help him. I think I have a milder form as I find I recognise some of the features in myself. I will look through the comments but wondered what books you would recommend. At this point he is finding everything difficult and rarely leaves the house.
Hello, Im a mom and i started noticing things in myself that I might have ADHD, then I started noticing things in my son, hes 14. I told his dr. And was referred to another dr to get Evaluated. Your son is not getting any medical attention, medication, etc. Im no doctor but maybe thst would help him. I have heard of people that take medication and helps them have a "normal" life.
We paid and took him to a phyciatrist when he was 18 and was prescribed medication which did help and do help our GP continue to support but private medical health support was out of our means. He managed a year training at college and since the pandemic has lost his confidence. Just struggling to help him.
I would just like to say thank you for taking the time to actually be empathetic and loving to your children who are struggling to even do the most simple of things like chores. So many of us have parents who tell us we just aren’t working hard enough or we don’t care. I also want to thank you guys for having the empathy to realise that you may have the same traits and possible have ADHD yourselves. Adhd is genetic and usually passed down from the mother to the child but a lot of moms often don’t have the emotional maturity to take a moment and see that they also have the disorder. And it’s usually the parents who don’t share the motivations symptoms who end up emotionally abusing their kids by telling them they’re lazy or that ADHD isn’t that bad and to just try harder. I hope you both realise that so many of us wish we had mothers who love and care for their children and adult children and just want to help without making things worse by not believing the condition (or worse the diagnosis)
Thank you to Fabulous for sponsoring this video!! Start building your ideal daily routine! The first 100 people who click on the link will get 25% OFF Fabulous Premium: www.thefab.co/katimorton2
they stopped giving out ADD/ADHD medications because it got proven ADD/ADHD doesnt exist now it gets called ODD and why the children get off the medication at 18
they sometimes give a placebo to autistic people because lets face it autism is ADD/ADHD with the exception of hypomania being called it and a few other things
Would have really loved some actionable items at the end of this video and would welcome watching a future follow up ~
as someone with ADHD who was always told i was “wasting my potential” with my laziness, this video gave me a sort of inner peace, like healing a wound that’s been open for a really long time. thanks sm kati!!
You’re not lazy and you’re welcome. Thank you for watching the video and sharing how it made you feel. 🙌🙌
It has been similar for me. For most of my childhood and college life, I thought I was just lazy and a procrastinator. I didn't know it was ADHD. (Diagnosed 4 yrs ago)
This has helped in continuing to change my negative self talk that plagued me as well.
ADD/ADHD as far as i know doesnt exist because there are 0 tests for it my guess you more likely have autism and the adorol works great for autistic people but from any test i ever heard of to diagnosis ADD/ADHD everybody in the entire world has it including the curmudgeon dave koller from TYT because he never finished reading a manual or something like that
So happy for you. Be happy🙏
Yes!!, relateable!! Poison of the lies Thank you ! For sharing..
Honestly, I've learned that my ADHD, depression, anxiety and procrastination issues are all so intertwined that it doesn't make much practical sense to try to unravel them.
Unmanaged attentional issues cause anxiety. The anxiety becomes a barrier to getting things done. Too much anxiety for too long leads to a depressive episode. Depression will cause negative thinking, self-criticism, physical inertia and worsened attentional difficulties until ... Anxiety strikes about everything not getting done, then avoidance of the amxiety is encouraged by the negativistic thinking of the depressive mood.
If there depression lifts, you're back to square one. Rinse and repeat the cycle.
Can we just face the fact that no one is inherently lazy, that there's always a bunch of psychological and/or physical at play? I feel like I'm constantly chasing acknowledgement; whether through a diagnosis or not, I'm desperate to find justification for my limitations. The truth is, I can't be "happy and successful (financially)" in today's culture and economy, where we expect people to be super-productive and that this productivity has to be "in demand". It's like, I have to choose between ignoring my limits now and unrealistically hope to retire comfortably later, or give up and struggle to survive for the rest of my days.
Absolutely this! I always challenge people when they use the term "lazy" and encourage to discover what the real reasons are.
Yes! This is exactly what/how I think.
Yess agreed it can feel like an easy hit to be self deprecating when it isnt super helpful
💯
Yes exactly. I struggle the same thing. People thing I am lazy but the truth is that my energy drains so fast and I can't even find a job beacuse working so fast eight hours every day is just too much for my body.
This makes so much sense. I've always been known for an extremely hard worker at any job I do. I clean houses on the side for extra cash and can get through a house fast and do a perfect job yet I continually struggle to keep my own home clean and it continually stresses me out!
xoxo
Many house cleaners suffer same. Many chefs hate to cook at home. Many office workers hate to open mail and answer phones at home. It's a real thing...
You come home to relax not to do the same thing as you do for work, it may sound ironic but it would help if you hire a cleaner once in a while to clean yours and ask your friends to come over for a glass of wine to organize your closet.
I don’t have ADHD but I did work as a house cleaner, the last thing I wanted to do is clean my own home on a weekend when everyone else are enjoying their precious family time.
I totally resonate with your comment!! As someone who has ADHD, it’s always harder to clean/organize my life/apartment than it is to want to help someone else tackle their organization piles!! I’m really struggling with my space lately! Mostly the motivation like she mentioned here! At least we’re not alone in our struggles! And I’ve found that if I pair a task that’s not exciting to me( like cleaning or organizing) with something that makes me happy like listening to a funny podcast/music then I’m more likely to enjoy it more! We gotta trick our brains to get motivated!👌👍hope it helps!!
Or years after cleaning the same things from other people in the home, you just dread when its all out of place again, like crumbs all over the place. Why cant they even wipe the counter for themselves, lol.. You clean the floor to stay clear, then next thing to notice is 20 things all over the floor again,errrr..
I'm 36, diagnosed within the past 2 years with ADHD and PTSD. I havent been able to get the appropriate treatment to figure it all out yet, but as someone who's parents say "you're fine", "suck it up and move on", or "I think your Dr is f*#&ing you up", watching some of your videos and being able to relate feels like being able to take a deep breath after being stuck under water.
I am 39, not officially diagnosed yet, but the signs have been there since I was a child. My parents refused to get me tested even though my teachers requested it - said I was just a normal kid and they were bad teachers/school environments weren't conducive to my age group. Neglecting to take into account everything I ever got in trouble for was related to forgetfulness/"laziness".
Fast forward however three decades later, I've been doing a lot of research trying to figure out how/why my brain works the way it does - and surprise! My Dad has EVERY symptom of ADHD also. No wonder he doesn't believe in it and thought there was nothing weird about the way I was/am. 😅 He's the same way
I just got diagnosed too at 28. My mom has always been that way with me too. She has depression, so she thinks it’s normal to feel shitty.
I'm 44 diagnosed with ADHD combined type and according to the doctor one of the most extreme cases she's ever seen. My parents are the same way so I just didn't tell them. My small circle of grinds and my hubby are my support.
Totally! @ Casey Hage !! It does feel like taking a deep breath after being stuck under water 💦 what a smart analogy!!! How did you actually get diagnosed, from your primary doctor or does it have to be a psychiatrist?? I can’t seem to get into see a psychiatrist in my area😫 but, I know how you’re feeling I’m 45 and just kinda figured this out on my own a year ago via UA-cam videos and googling symptoms!! It helps to have a name for it… and not to feel like I was the only adult who doesn’t know how to adult!! I’m sorry your parents have been so dismissive though! That’s hurtful😓 at least you can feel good that you’ve sought out the help you deserve!!!! Way to go!! And welcome to ADHD tribe, we’re all pretty awesome peeps 🙌🏼💜💚💜
*FRIENDS. ADHD TYPO TAX!
I’ve always felt I’m lazy and unorganised and I’m not doing nothing to change it so it’s my fault and then when Depression sets in everything just feels so much worse - I think you can do it because when you have no choice and the deadline is there I do it so must be lazy - also with someone helping overseeing I can understand and do it - but hearing this video makes me feel less shitty about myself thank you Katie as always your videos are healing peoples self critics - helping us be more compassionate to ourselves so we can love ourselves a little more !! ❤️ x
I'm not diagnosed with ADHD but this video really resonated with me. i've noticed that my anxiety and perfectionism is what prevents me from getting started on tasks even things I think are fun
Have you been officially diagnosed with ADHD now? Based on what I’m reading it seems like they can go hand in hand
Definitely helps reminding myself to take small/baby steps first. Especially when I want my self care routine to be “perfect”. I struggle with perfection a lot of the times.
I needed this video this morning! I started a new job yesterday, a pretty intense job, and there was A LOT to take on yesterday. Luckily my team seems very supportive and I can even bring up this video with them, but I haven't been sleeping well the past couple nights, thinking about all my tasks and responsibilities, but I need to e realistic about what I can do each day and minimize my perfectionist qualities, set goals, and not get overwhelmed by tasks that seem tedious and not let them lag behind and be honest with myself and my team about how I can achieve and orchestrate my tasks successfully while juggling work life balance. Thanks Katie!
Urgency is something I didn't even realise I was using: I'll make a fake event so that I have a deadline before I need to do something else, just so I can say "Okay, I've gotta go to the grocery store in 20mins, I gotta get this done before I go!" - even though I've made up the time for the grocery store, so it's not really a deadline
I love how you innately knew that helped and it would keep you motivated to finish tasks!! Thanks for sharing :) xxoo
As a teacher I try to make sure that my students with ADHD that I'm not trying to fix them because they're not broken. I also tell them that we need to find tools to cope with the challenges because they are not going to grow out of it. It's always amazing how many assignments get turned in when I have the student do a bag or locker dump. A lot of the work is already done, but the executive function to turn stuff in is missing. I encourage the students to just do a bag dump every Friday.
As someone with ADHD, Dysthymia and chronic pain, I struggle with multiple things:
Motivation
Energy
Bad Brain Days
Bad Pain Days
And it helped me to get used to the thought: productivity isn't the goal, living comfortable is.
I’ve never heard of dysthymia so I looked it up! Thanks for teaching me something new 🥰😘😘 I didn’t know that even had a name! I thought it was just persistent depression, I’ve had depression since a kid too and I’m on antidepressants for life, I still have some severe dips but thankfully since I got the right meds they’re pretty rare, I do have a lot of little down days still though, I hope yours is in a better place for you! ❤️❤️❤️😘😘xxxx
I haven't been diagnosed with dysthymia but I suspect I have it. This all totally sounds like me...
Amen. Healthy and happy too.
I love that quote thank you
I can't even remotely count how often I've been told or people made me feel like I'm lazy and not working hard enough. Even people that love me and want the best for me and thought that it was just a reality and there was just nothing that could be done about that. But it always made me feel like I'm just a bad person and not like acceptance in any shape or form. In the end what it did was, that I "accepted" myself as lazy and gave up on everything, not even urgency could do anything to motivate me. Because bad, lazy people don't do things. So why would I?
It took years of therapy to get rid of this horribly damaging belief and I'm so happy that my therapist realised that this was what crippled my ability to make progress in life.
I have ADHD and generalized anxiety disorder, so I procrastinate for everything you mentioned... I work well under pressure, or at least I used to. Lately, working on my master's degree has found me staring at my computer for hours unable to get started, because I have perfectionist tendencies and fear I'm not going to do the assignment right. School used to be easy for me, but it isn't anymore.
semangatttt !!
Going through this while doing undergrad and it's so freaking daunting and terrifying that my grades are affected only because of turning in my work late😭
You've described exactly what I feel perfectly
Thank you for making this video❤
I’m dealing with a cocktail of ADHD, C-PTSD, chronic sleep disorders, fatigue and pain - and using the four factors you are talking about has certainly helped me.
The best way for me to get by is to try and be gentle with myself, and accept that though I'm ambitious and a recovering perfectionist, I can't always live up to my own or others expectations.
The lack of energy is the thing I’m mostly bothered by, and it’s really causing a lot of frustration for me. If I’m extremely low on energy, I can’t do much else than rest for as long as it takes for my body to regain enough energy so that I can function just a little bit again. It can take days and weeks and even months if it's really bad.
@VETSPORES ON INSTAGRAM No thanks.
Just the video I needed to help me push through my online courses. I got up early and just made coffee so I can take on the day. I know this motivation won’t last but this year I want to finally get it right. Thankfully I finally got ADHD support as well. Thanks Kati!
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That's brilliant! Yes, I feel that the video is helping as well; even just with understanding and acceptance. Like mentioning the large to do list! I do one of these most days!!! And almost always don't get through them all!!!
Setting urgency/timers/deadlines is definitely helpful! I do this too, but not enough. I shall try to implement this. Thank you!
I was diagnosed with ADHD this year, at the ripe old age of 31!
I've been watching your content for years, Kati! I'm so glad to see you cover ADHD in your thorough and compassionate "Kati style".
Love from Australia! 🇦🇺
I have struggled with motivation my entire life. When I was in university, I was focused but I struggled to learn. I was constantly bullied as a child with words like, 'you will never succeed, you are not smart enough, you are stupid, and you will never accomplish the goals you want. In short, I was told by my Dad that I was garbage and I grew up with a deep sense of self-hate. This problem has caused so many problems for me. I wish parents would stop bullying their kids. They have no idea about the harm it causes. I have participated in mental health courses to improve my mental health and I have heard many people talk about the negative effects of bullying. Can we all just agree that bullying is harmful enough to be called a threat to our brain health and mental well-being?
I’ve never really been told that I’m lazy or a procrastinator per se but I’ve definitely always been told that my brain is going too fast, especially too fast for my hands so my handwriting is god awful etc, I definitely do procrastinate though, I’m struggling so much with executive dysfunction lately too! 😩
I'm Autistic and I procrastinate a lot. My therapist explained it's because I get too anxious to start the task. Perfectionism and lack of energy are also big reasons why I procrastinate.
miss, you're fit
body goals ✨
Something that I've found is that there is a time factor anxiety mixed with perfectionism - can't start because I know how long it will take, and in the back of my mind I feel guilty like I should be doing something else. Unless I have the peace of mind to solely focus without guilt and enjoy the process, then I may as well not start at all. Ironically, when I finally get around to it I somehow get pulled away by other people.
Great video - thank you.
However, wonder about depression and where that fits in.
When I am stuck, I ponder if is it ADHD, procrastination or depression as to why tasks are so hard to start and complete.
Thumbs UP!
Thanks for mentioning that!! Yes depression can steal our motivation too, and it can be hard to untangle where it comes from. When battling depression the best thing we can do (if we are able) is to do what's called behavioral activation, which really just means that we should push ourselves to start doing something we used to like. That can make us feel slightly better, and accomplished. xoxo
@@Katimorton Many thanks Kati, you are very kind for replying and with something helpful too. Thanks.
Very best - Gray
Undiagnosed adhd leads to anxiety and depression, the trick is to find a good doctor who can differentiate. Good luck!
As someone who was born with an intellectual disability, sometimes, I always dealt with procrastination.
Yup, the reasons to procrastinate really resonate with me...
Thank you for the video, Kati!
I'm struggling a lot these past few months.I have no motivation at all and hardly feel like getting out of bed. I'm anxious about the future in every way. I want to move out of the country, but as you said, the "reward is too far out". Thus, I need to get a job here first, but I'm scared of job interviews, I can't stand talking to people without freaking out. Getting out of my comfort zone gives me anxiety and I'm so afraid of failing miserably in the given role. Why is life so complicated?
Kati .. your videos take from me triple times that it is original times, because I have to stop and write down some really good notes that pops up to my mind after hearing and listening to your words. Thanks
Thank you, Katie! What helps me (sometimes, definitely not always) is tell myself I only do 5 minutes. Or for my writing or business administration: I'll just write something down and see how it goes. It doesn't need to make sense, just words, write them down. Because I need to wake up my brain and tbh my brain is either racing (towards something non urgent but novel) or sleeping. Once I sit down to write, I eventually wake up and continue. Its the getting started that's the worst for me. Overwhelm, perfectionism and so on. For cleaning I watch shows like hoarders. Watching others clean (and scream) helps me get motivated. I also use the flylady system! Do something small every day instead of crash and burn after hours of cleaning. And meds, I need my meds! ♥️
You are amazing and your videos often hit on the exact topic I need at that point in my life. Your hard work and information is very much appreciated by myself and I'm sure others out here! Thank you!
Thank you 🫶
Thanks so much for creating this video! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year at 32 years old (after years of wondering and self-doubt) and I feel so often that it's a mix of not having the motivation to do what needs to get done on short term issues, and procrastination on longer term projects. I've found that chunking things down into much smaller steps has helped me out tremendously, but I still find myself occasionally in that space where I am missing the "motivational puzzle piece" that is keeping me from moving forward in a process or project, and I then try to reach out and feel around until I find the piece that fits and keeps me moving forward, or stop that "thing" I'm doing and regroup later.
Oh Kati, thank you so much for your content! I am struggling with procrastination since school, currently with writing my thesis...and having depression. Unfortunately I didn't find any way around it yet. Even though thinking of small bites of a big task, the awareness of the big task and the likely critism by others drains my whole energy.
Thanks for existing Kati! I find ALL of your videos helpful. Thank you!
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I am still learning how to set SMART Goals & breaking things down into smaller steps.
I think this video is amazing as a limited introduction to some of the issues people with ADHD face!
however there is the opportunity for a real risk of harm being created by this this video as a result of a theraputic practitioner with a large platform failing to address the physical component to executive dysfunction.
When caused by the brain being structured differently (this is common) the strategies suggested are not resolutions.
This is part of the common misinformation referenced in the introduction. ADHD is often incorrectly listed as a learning disability (IQ below 70) When actually it is categorically a learning DIFFICULTY (still a disability that affects learning but does not result in low IQ)
ADHD falls into the same category as Dyslexia. The dysfunction is permenant and not removable.
Eecutive dysfunction is also commonly found in traumatic brain injury. What actually helps is coming to terms with your disability and learning how to live the best life YOU can based on your individual capabilities. Therapy can help with this process but has limitations.
In the same way therapy is not delivered as the primary treatment for restoration of brain functioning after a horrible accident , it is also not the cure for executive dysfunction stemming from a congenital difference in brain structure.
If you are a neurodivergent reading this searching for answers/instructions/ the thing that will fix you and allow you to be happy, Hear me. What you are experiencing is not in your head, not your fault and probably not something you can change.
Misinformation is everywhere. let go of what you're told is required for worthy existence. The same people responsible for your trauma and alienation are the ones convincing you the answer to your suffering is for you to "fix yourself"
They are broken. They are wrong. They failed. Not you. There is nothing about you that ever needed to be healed.
That thumbnail is dope! That is some sick guns sister!
Thank you for always explaining complicated topics in a respectful and non-judgemental manner :))
I've suspected for a long time that I have ADHD (have never gone to get diagnosed for that) and nearly everything that was talked about in this video is what I've dealt with, and continue to deal with, on a daily basis. Feels very validating as my family always called me lazy and I know I can be at times but it's far more than that.
This does need to be heard by more. It took me way too long to get diagnosed and my "prime" years i kinda feel were wasted by not having help because people just didn't see the signs that this was a neurological issue and not just me "being lazy".
I have MDD and PDD and anxiety, and I’m horrible about procrastinating. The fear of failure, not seeing into the future, perfectionism, and anxiety are dead on the reasons I procrastinate.
I never use to be this way either, and I’ve always struggled with depression and anxiety. I use to get assignments done a week or two ahead of time. Now I wait until the very last second, and I DO NOT work well under pressure.
I use the analogy of a dead car battery. We can have a thought to do something; that’s turning the key. The procrastination or AD[H]D Is the dead battery, the inability to turn over to start the car.
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age and this perfectly explains problems I've been dealing with for my entire life and especially so now in grad school. I particularly relate to the information you talk about when it comes to anxiety and perfection. This video was eye opening and I hope I can put some of your tips into action to make tasks that seem daunting much more approachable. I'm happy that I found this channel through YMH and Christina P.
I have always had an issue with procrastination- my earliest memories of it go back to early elementary school. When I was in my spring semester of my sophomore year of college, it got REALLY bad: every long weekend as well as spring break got "robbed" from me because I was constantly playing catch-up on the work I had chosen to avoid doing when it was assigned. It was THE WORST. For fall semester of my junior year, I was resolved not to let it get that bad again, so I kept an agenda for about the first month of school until the accountability made me feel more stressed than the procrastination itself.
Procrastination still shows itself to me now (fifteen years later), and thankfully it isn't with catastrophic things. To-do lists are definitely a helpful reminder about what needs to get done.
Thank u Kati. I ain’t lazy I struggle somethings 💯🔥✌🏽
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A really good discussion on procrastination. I think breaking tasks into small parts is a good idea. Being physically fit and exercising will give you energy and strength for the day. Also, if you can create a list of reasons to complete a task then that will motivate you to finish the task. Write a list of compelling reasons or benefits to complete the task. When you know there is a strong reason to work hard, then you work hard and finish tasks.
And how do you motivate yourself to get the paper, get the pen and write??
As a person struggling with ADHD since I was 9yrs old (I'm 42 now) and still struggling (but with the luxury of inner peace, thankfully), thank you Kati.
🙏🤗😉🇧🇷
Same. I'm 37 and @times worry about the "how the fuck can this have lasted since I was a child" line of thoughts. So.. inner peace just always seems so far away unless I literally talk myself out of it.
Of course!! So glad it was helpful :) xoxox
@@EMdemo it took me a long time to accept myself as I am (not as efficient as other people and on top of that, not understood by friend and family, AKA lazy or victim). Thankfully I'm an introvert, so if they don't care I make do with the company of my cats and dogs. That's how I found some degree of inner peace.
EMdemo, I truly wish you the best and that you find means to cultivate your inner peace as well.
Best wishes and take good care of yourself.
😉😉🤗🤗
Thank you.
Also:
dogs and cats are literally the best.
Thank you! Struggling with this! The brain is on or off, really annoying. Diagnosed now at 48 (!) and all my strategies has been worn out. I can’t seem to trick myself to do things. I can see trough my self’-manipulation. So now it’s kind of meta - I have to trick myself that I don’t trick myself in order to make myself doing stuff… it’s tiring! Thanks for your pod! It’s a lifesaver! ✨🎈✨
I have ADHD and I find that by setting goals in my life. I set goals that I can perseverate on. I think I do this because I kind of become addicted to the dopamine hit so to speak. I am physically disabled so I struggle with doing my physical therapy exercises. But when I don't do them my joints hurt more.
Thank you Kati
I have been struggling with it,it has brought so many proplems specially in school I left the school and transformed to a military night school .during college I toke medicine and a lot of sessions praise to Allah I have never faced any problems because of it during college.I hate to remember it it was igony.
I was a young girl around the time when it was extremely rare that girls could be diagnosed with ADHD as well as boys. Though I felt like something was different about me growing up, I was always gaslit out of my belief by everyone around me, every time I brought it up to an adult or a friend, and was always dismissed with a larger amount of guilt than I had before for being lazy, or seemingly anxious for no reason. I have been struggling now as a young adult in the world, especially economically. As I've learned more about ADHD I've come to realize I relate to almost every single symptom, and though I'm not officially diagnosed, I feel comfortable labeling myself this way for now.
I don't have health insurance and live in the U.S. so I just wanted to say these videos are like a lifeboat to those of us young adults out here who can't afford to be seen by a professional, but are really struggling and need help. 🖤 Thanks so much for the effort you put into these helpful and knowledgeable videos!! They give me faith and relief to know that my experience is the norm for many people, and that there's hope for my struggling brain, and ways to cope with how it works 🖤
I really hope you’re able to get a doctor. Medication and CBT have made a huge difference for me.
Thank you for displaying the fabulous logo during your presentation of their sponsorship. It really helps me as an audience member
I was looking for a list of 4 or 5 things to do to stop procrastinating. You did an excellent job of describing it. Thanks so much.
This is the best procrastination video, something that was so difficult to put into words and sort out.Thank you!
I set 20 minute timers and just work on that dreaded thing for 20 minutes. I usually reset the timer a few times and then BOOM!...I've made significant progress on that project.
What’s been your experience with ADHD and motivation? What has helped? What hasn’t? Let me know in the comments! 👇
I have a question because I relate with a lot of adhd symptoms and alot of advice given for adhd viewer is helpful to me but when i asked to be diagnosed by a previous therapist he said he didnt think i have adhd because im too functioning. Aside two or three times i always make it to work most therapy appointment at the time and things like that. At this point i do have a planner i use on and off. im sure youd probably need more information but is it possible to only experience system in certain areas of life, for me cleaning up my apartment and making sure my dishes and laundry are done have been a real big struggle and when i experience most system. i did relate to the functioning with urgency portion of the video you mentioned because i have anxiety about missing work alot
I'll need to write a book lol
I am a procrastinator AND it’s adhd, lol. What helps is checking for body needs (including meds!), making sure I am clear on the first two smallest possible actions towards doing the thing, coworking with a friend on zoom, and sometimes setting a timer to just work on it for 20
minutes and then I can stop. What doesn’t work is berating myself in my head, and any productivity advice aimed at neurotypicals based around planning and prioritizing and scheduling.
Medication has helped me tremendously! I wasn't diagnosed until I was 30 and I can't tell you how many doors have opened up because I can now focus and complete tasks in a timely manner!
One thing that helps with putting thing off is I do 30 minutes of the project then 30 minutes of something fun as well as music helps my motivation cause I can’t really find the motivation
I REALLY wish you were my personal therapist 😞 I have BPD, bipolar 2, cptsd, panic disorder, gad, and health anxiety and I struggle with finding a therapist that I can get along with and that doesn't make me feel shitty after seeing them. You explain things in a way that is easy to understand while giving ways to help without judgement. Just being a borderline patient alone causes attitude from most therapists I see especially being a low income patient. I wish more therapists were like you and strongly considering moving to wherever you are (not actually going to and not trying to be creepy 😆) just to get good therapy. Ty for your time with your videos! It's appreciated more than I can explain in words 💜
I’d love to see a video specifically on task paralysis!
Yep, I'm struggling with depression, ADHD, and procrastination. Especially, tasks I do not want to do, like having to call people I don't know personally.
In my household, I keep putting tasks off out of fear of failure. My mobility is low, I need a walker outdoors and crutches in my flat. My wishful thinking revolves around a flat that's always clean and presentable, no physical strain necessary. I hate physical strain. Anything that requires physical activity, be it sports or a deep clean is clearly a no-can-do. You might be able to persuade me if I knew for sure I would have to do it only once and never again.
Yes, I know there is the KonMari method and a few others, and I was able to sort out clothes, books, and documents. Then the motivation bubble collapsed. It is still lying there, no air.
Exactly. Maybe the whole world has ADD based on the lack of dopamine to get us to finish tasks we don’t like. So people without ADD don’t need to trick or reward ourselves to do unwanted tasks? LMAO. Currently I am procrastinating on cleaning my basement flooded by my fa,ily dumping things there. I don’t have the dopamine to carry out this cleaning task. Wait, I think I have ADD.
Yayy! Glad you were able to make a video on ADHD. Thank you! 😊
I've found that being kind to myself, gamifying mundane tasks, and keeping fast-acting methods at work that push dopamine and norepinephrine can be really helpful. Like a lot of acupuncturists, I'm self-employed, so being my own boss does allow me the luxury of keeping a guitar (an unamplified electric, so it's not loud), kettlebell, and a huge collection of books on meditation and qigong in my back office. When I'm having difficulty doing something mundane, a few kettlebell swings, some qigong, or a couple of minutes of guitar can give a bit of a push if I need one.
Aside from that, I don't let myself start certain admin tasks (like paperwork) before 11am. That seems to be the sweet spot for me for fully engaging in the most mundane parts of work. I really lack dimmer switches on my focus, so if I'm not fully engaged in a task, it will take me a really long time to get it done. I feel like timing tasks in a way that fits our own brain architecture can make such a difference...and on that note, the "do the most difficult thing first" piece of common advice is not very helpful for me. I need a few minor wins before the difficult thing comes up.
Hey Kati, thank you so much for your content! It has truly been a sanity saver for me. You put my mind at ease day after day after day.
I don’t know where to go to ask you a question so I’m hoping that here is ok.
Do you think you could make a video on migraines and mental health and if there is a connection there?
I have suffered terrible migraines since I was 9 years old. They gave me a lot of anxiety and caused me to become avoidant. Plus I developed OCD tendencies (not sure if that’s related) but it was truly traumatic in my youth especially.
I had all the symptoms: nausea, aura, dysphasia, complete numbness on one side of the body etc. etc. I would get them as often as every 2 weeks and sometimes they would last for up to 5 days, reoccurring.
It made me hyper vigilant and I am already highly sensitive and rejection sensitive. I also developed and eating disorder (which I believe to be connected).
These days (at 36) I have the migraines mostly managed but I’m only now realising how my mental health has suffered and so I’m out to find out as much information as I can.
I want to know which most likely came first, the anxiety? Or the migraines?
Can you help?
I've never been diagnosed but I know I am or I'm on the autistic spectrum...At school I was often in a dream world of my own..I would get obsessed with things and then discard them completely..I would get lost on school trips etc or would fall behind in maths or science classes etc..I was often branded as a bit stupid by other kids or the teachers would say I was lazy..I would often over compensate by being the class clown etc...I would also be and still am in some respects a people pleaser and never really knew who I was.. As I got older I'd forget where I parked my car or lose concentration whilst driving or even crash as I was concentrating on something else..I also noticed I drank to access and took other recreational substances and would be hyper sometimes and out of control...I always knew something was wrong..I'd adopted lots of habits from childhood to deal with stress like biting my nails or picking my nose etc..I had bad negative self asteem etc I can be a perfectionist at times or I can completly put off tasks that I need to do where I literally can't be bothered to do a mundane task etc...My GP has told me it takes years to get a diagnoses in the UK..
Thank you Kati, I've watched several of your clips over the last year or so. But the latest ones feel like they are the universe saying "Here you go, this is some information you needed but didn't know you needed it".
I have ADHD and suffer from procrastination as well, but it was the Childhood Emotional Neglect clip that rocked me to my core, I have suffered from Dysthymia for most of my life an been in and out of mental hospitals for nearly a decade and have had way to many MDD episodes to keep count. Over the last 10 years I have done a lot of self-examination/self-reflection and have gotten a fair idea of my negative self-beliefs and self-talk, and how they talk/feed in to each other.
As I watched and processed the Childhood Emotional Neglect clip, it was like a light had been turned on and it allowed me to see where the beliefs had come from.
Thank you Kati for all you do, and for helping me to have a massive breakthrough and unlock more of my mental health.
Chris
PS currently in hospital for MDD again but always trying to get the little bit better than yesterday.
How do I find that clip please?
@@louiserothman6566 The Childhood Emotional Neglect clip is here :>> ua-cam.com/video/q7Nlxwgy79U/v-deo.html
Hope it helps and sorry for the delay n getting back to you.
As someone with nonverbal learning disorder and ADHD this makes a lot of sense. I have so much difficulty completing the project management tasks at work because i have to keep jumping through folders to get to them. I then have to scroll through and find something else. It makes me so mad that my work is set up for neurotypicals, and i always get frustrated trying to finish my tasks because of how many friggin folders i have to jump through. I feel seen
Thank you for the video reminding me to finish my Innerchild workshop homework Kati. At least me overscheduling these days has been in favor of my schoolwork for the most part. I'm proud of myself for that.
Ok miss muscle mommy!!! I’m sorry I clicked because your arm looked so jacked in the thumbnail and as a bonus I was able to learn about ADHD!
Thank you
I think I missed the point of the video. The title says "ADHD *OR* Procrastination" however, all of the factors Katie mentioned were a mix of both conditions and procrastination was also a symptom of ADHD. So how do I know if what I am struggling with is just your run of the mill procrastination or if its ADHD and I should get extra help?
To add to this: I watched a video on TikTok where someone talked about INCUP for adhd. INCUP stands for Interest, Novelty, Competition/Challenge, Urgency, and Pressure. Just a few more things that might help someone with their adhd brain.
This whole damn video is GOLD. ⭐️
So very validating.... I totally used to not want to leave my house until after my amazing therapist physically took me to mental health LNP and got me evaluated . I definitely have come a long way with the right meds but processing time is still so hard. So some times I don't know if I'm late because I'm procrastinating or I'm in a time fog. Timers for everything but what 5mins feels like for me is still not the reality of 5mins. Lol I tell people to literally lie to me if they want me there on time. Its at 6 pm but really it starts at 7:30pm . It actually does work lol
Hi Katie, thank u so much for all your wonderful videos, they’ve been really helping me a lot?
I was wondering if u could make a video about autism and ways to know if you have it? Because I think I might be
Thanks!
Perfectionism! Yes! My husband calls it my OCD but it's not the same.
Sometimes I tell myself "Your future self is going love it when this is done." I also tell myself sometimes "Doing X is self care." It doesn't always work but it does some of the time.
This is very interesting to listen to because my husband has a PhD in Psychology, specializing in personality and procrastination/procrastination.
🫶
I am the perfectionistic procrastinator and it's kept me from reaching my potential. People don't understand it. It's debilitating.
Hi Kati! Thank you so much for this video. Really helpful. ❤ Just want to ask, aside from the things you mentioned in the video, when do you think someone should consult a therapist about having ADHD symptoms? Thanks in advance! 🥰
I have to do a project for college that is working against me in every single one of the four factors, and even beyond them. It also plays right into my social anxiety, and so much more. I have done nothing, the deadline is tomorrow, and I will fail. There is no way in hell this could have gone any other way. It has happened before, and it will happen again just like this, without me being able to put up a fight. It's just how I am.
Everyone has to be more and more careful to keep up
One thing that works well for me: if I do not want to do a set of tasks because of these kinds of reasons, I always do something fun first. Either my favorite task or something smalls that gives me a small dopamine boost. Also, with tasks that are too boring (like doing the dishes) I always make sure to pair it with something more stimulating. I have found that podcasts or documentaries stimulate me enough to do the boring task on the side
The motivation issue is a huge problem for me in that I have problems getting motivated for even those things I WANT to do. Which is why I have 100’s of books that haven’t been read yet and I haven’t been able to write with any consistency in years. Specialists are stretched to the breaking point, which is why it’s hard getting help. ‘Fabulous’ sounds good but I’m afraid it’s just going to be something else I spend money on only to not use it because it’s not quite what I need. I’m in a bit of a struggle. 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks for your tips, reminders & transparency, Kati!
It’s scary how much adhd does to the brain… I never realized how much isn’t just me being bad at school or work
10:00 people are able to memorize long soliloquies or hundreds of digits of pi thanks to chunking. I wonder if we can treat tasks like that and increase the size of our To Do lists. Like, group "sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor, wipe down and clean out fridge, run and empty dishwasher, wipe down cupboards and counters" into just "clean kitchen"
What always puzzled me was, why I cannot get the motivation to do the things, that I actually really enjoy doing?
If it just was something I hated doing, then it would make sense.
The answer might be depression. ❤ I speak from experience and have heard content from doctors say exactly this.
I just got diagnosed with ADHD. and through this process, I’m having doubts, like maybe it’s not ADHD but it’s just a lot of anxiety.
So every time I’ve been doing a task since then, I realize that I am really anxious about not being able to get it done correctly so I avoided. And I go do some thing that just makes me feel better.
But it’s confusing because more often than not I tune out or want to do like five different things at the same time.
Hello! i'm someone whose been quite associated with mental problems already and im here like trying to know about amother disorder like what the f am i collecting these bunch of sickness and it makes me feel weird but still i just wanna make sure.
one thing to note, i have ocd. and nonetheless i have problems with trying to differentiate ADHD with plain laziness. for example, i am also that kind of person who puts off work for several days or so when in reality i know i can do that work even less than half a day. i also know in myself that i am much more capable of always making outstanding outputs (at least this is what i thought of). i know if i just work on this if i just truly devote and focus on this, i know i can do a great job. but doing it and starting it just seems real challenging. i also have a hard time multi tasking. for example, when i decide to work on my study loads, then I MUST WORK NONSTOP. once i go out of my room or even do other things which requires me to go out of my freaking room, or even just take a break with substantial time, i just know it will ruin my moment. i think it is rlly inconvinient because not at all times i can just stay in my room, sometimes i rlly need to go out etc. but i can't and i shouldn't because that would ruin the current situation or condition i barely managed to place myself in.
another example! sometimes i even put off going to the restroom because i'm afraid it will ruin the glimpse of hard work i tried so hard to achieve. heck, i dont even eat outside my room because i have problem with consistency and HONESTLY idk what's my freaking problem. oftentimes it's also because of my rituals which takes sm time that's why i just want to avoid moving a lot from my desk.
it is indeed frustrating. not to mention all the rituals, obsessive actions, and instrusive thoughts trying to come all at once every minute every second i breathe so idk rlly. does these things have to do with ADHD? actually, i don't think i have ADHD but i'm just asking because i don't know this disorder well. and like my ocd, tricho as well excoriation went along for like my whole life before i discovered such "thing" exists with other ppl.
HOPE U COULD ANSWER MY INQUIRIES! Have a good day! 🔥☔
For a while I used to set up a routine on Alexa and it would play music for exactly 30 minutes and that was the motivation time to get up and clean the kitchen
Good stuff here. thank you!
I needed this video.
I have add but paired along with ocd ptsd and schizoaffective - it does feel painful to do things. I suffer from black and white thinking it’s either going to be perfect or it’s not happening. I hate it but I’m happy I downloaded the app. I’m going to try and stick to it.
I'd like to leave a comment, but I'm not sure....
Terimakasih videonya sangat bermanfaat..
I wanted to say that even though I didn't stick with Fabulous in the long run, I did find it really useful to condition some routines into my day and they did stick 👌
(I'm ADHD/Autistic)
I went to get evaluated by a neuropsychologist because my therapist said I seemed like I could have ADHD. She found it is all GAD, no ADHD. Procrastination... Yeah.... Anxiety... Yup. It was great to have that diagnosis though. My doctor added Buspar to my Zoloft, and it's only been a few months... But hey, feels like it's helping. Thanks for all your informative videos, Kati. Always nice to know I'm not the only one who feels certain ways! ☺
Do you mind if I ask how they are able to diagnose adhd and generalized anxiety disorder differently? I feel like there’s a lot of overlap. How I know it’s not just anxiety for me is because the 4 SSRIs I’ve been on made basically no difference
I just wait until a wave of “oooh, want to do that now” hits me, and I roll with it. Making myself do things NOW using almost any trick leave me feeling tired and resentful. I just need a domamine drip.
i just click on home page the moment the ad start and came back now
There is also many who simply see themselves as 'superior' to others and do even want to give time to those with ADHD or any other so called 'weaknesses'. Nobody is 'perfect'. Everyone is different. It's very important to show 'respect' for and to others in a non judgemental manner. I trust that many will gain a true understanding of ADHD and not use this knowledge as a way to 'control' manipulate or bully those living with ADHD. Mutual respect needs to be present in all environments including the work and home environment. If you 'care' for others you should care to respect 'who' they are and be a true friend to them, not someone who laughs at them behind their back.
If you are not a qualified Doctor, then 'self medication' is a dubious route to follow. We all have 'unique' individual requirements. A fully qualified Doctor in whatever field they practice and if a consultant in this field has gained years and years of experience. They are also held accountable for what they say and what they proscribed. The world is full of 'half penny' Doctors. 'Paper never refused ink'. Health Professionals are 'Health Professionals'. The Royal Colleges set a high standard both of entry requirements and standards required to practice. The medical professional in the United Kingdom are world class Professionals in whatever field they practice.
The biggest one for me is my depression hole. It's huge. And I know they're are broken, damaged, irreversibly dirty things buried in it. Plus the insurmountable energy required to clean it all, and the pain that's to come join in, and make me feel pathetic. I was already weak and stupid before, but covid took me down to half that... I can't stand/ bend, my depression is worse than ever, and I just have no energy, even worse than before. And now I've finally gotten a job, my first since February. I want to crochet when I get home, but I just can't moved once I'm at down 😭 I feel so lazy.... like such a waste.... and then I look at the disgusting mess I created and what a horrible person I am...
Thank you for this, my son really struggles and sleeps a lot of the time. He finds motivation very difficult. Here in Britain there seems to be no help what so ever. He is 21 now and didn't finish school because he became very depressed aged 14 and tried to take his life on several occasions. He was diagnosed with adhd aged 18. I have just no idea how to help him. I think I have a milder form as I find I recognise some of the features in myself. I will look through the comments but wondered what books you would recommend. At this point he is finding everything difficult and rarely leaves the house.
Hello, Im a mom and i started noticing things in myself that I might have ADHD, then I started noticing things in my son, hes 14. I told his dr. And was referred to another dr to get
Evaluated. Your son is not getting any medical attention, medication, etc. Im no doctor but maybe thst would help him. I have heard of people that take medication and helps them have a "normal" life.
We paid and took him to a phyciatrist when he was 18 and was prescribed medication which did help and do help our GP continue to support but private medical health support was out of our means. He managed a year training at college and since the pandemic has lost his confidence. Just struggling to help him.
I would just like to say thank you for taking the time to actually be empathetic and loving to your children who are struggling to even do the most simple of things like chores. So many of us have parents who tell us we just aren’t working hard enough or we don’t care. I also want to thank you guys for having the empathy to realise that you may have the same traits and possible have ADHD yourselves. Adhd is genetic and usually passed down from the mother to the child but a lot of moms often don’t have the emotional maturity to take a moment and see that they also have the disorder. And it’s usually the parents who don’t share the motivations symptoms who end up emotionally abusing their kids by telling them they’re lazy or that ADHD isn’t that bad and to just try harder. I hope you both realise that so many of us wish we had mothers who love and care for their children and adult children and just want to help without making things worse by not believing the condition (or worse the diagnosis)
Came here for kati’s gun show 💪🏽💪🏽, stayed for the mental health gold. 😍💙💙