I decided to chase my dreams, this is what happened. | very honest reflection (rewriting me ep.4)
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- Опубліковано 5 сер 2024
- The first 500 people to use my link will get a 1 month free trial of Skillshare skl.sh/icharly03241
hi gorgeous girlies!! I am so happy to finally be able to tell the next part of my story and to be open about the discomfort that comes with change - bc turns out it's not as sparkly as some people make it out to be ;;)
But unfortunately it's necessary in order to grow, sooo here we are. this is my story, it's not perfect, but it is my own. And as uncle iroh said: "It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. If we take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. Understanding others, the other elements, and the other nations, will help you to become whole."
and this is me exploring those other elements ;)
0:00-1:55 I let go.
1:56-3:25 moving out at 25
3:26-7:42 how do I take care of myself
7:43-11:57 what happens when you leave your comfort zone
11:58-19:44 what change actually looks like
19:45-24:07 you have to dare to grow
i followed my dreams for a year
i changed my life in a year
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following your dreams in 2024 - Розваги
"I didn't feel at home in myself. And I want this chapter to be that. I want to be at peace with me, so that even if I feel uncomfortable in a certain place, I can always rely on the fact that I have a home within myself." Not me openly sobbing into my cheerios because this is exactly the same conclusion I've arrived at very recently myself. This is what I'm working on, loving and accepting myself above all else. I truly do think that this is the key to happiness actually. To true confidence. I see so much of myself in you. I too moved out of my mom's house at 25 and moved 9 hours away to a place I barely knew anyone. It was the best decision I ever made. Keep being you and making these videos 💕
thank you for saying this, truly. It can get real tough out here sometimes but knowing that other people did the same thing and are now calling it 'the best decision I ever made' gives me so so so much hope that this whole process will be worth it. You're a star, thank you ❤
I moved back home at 25 because I had to move out so young, and all it did was ensure that I failed to launch as an adult due to financial hardship. If I had a safe home to stay at til age 25 I'd have surely been a lot more successful already. There should be no judgement for you living at home til 25.
The more I grow and heal the more I cry. I cry all the time a lot of times for seemingly no reason but now I know that I’m trying new things and not suppressing my feelings
Calling yourself out for being distracted by UA-cam Shorts of horse hooves cleaning, & then reminding yourself you haven't had physical proximity to a horse in over a decade --- Only to still hang up the phone on yourself is so real
10:19 Saying you felt like another version of yourself that you haven't met yet was driving, and you had to be the passenger, will be on my mind for YEARS
so glad my analogies are of help ❤
The final "I trust her." really stood out to me. I would love to get to that point. Thank you for this video
matter of fact is: you will. just give yourself time, trust needs patience and care but the good thing is, it can't help but grow when love is present ❤
I am so glad I found your channel, I amazed at how much I relate to your content. Thanks for sharing your growth
daaamn the blonde eyebrows read was the necessary spice haha
not but fr thank you so much for being here and tagging along my journey ❤
It is so good to see somebody being real. I relate to you so much, I am also tortured by anxiety but if I say I'll do something I go through with it. But in my case it's because the anxiety of cancelling and being seen by everyone as somebody who doesn't keep their word and/or fails whatever they start is SO MUCH STRONGER lol
omg I think I just found sm out about myself thank you girl haha
your writing is GOLD!!! you are a storytelling QUEEN! love your thoughts and your creations! this video is so yummy for the eyes, the color grading, the scrambled clips and b-roll, it's all just GOLDEN
well I cried through the last half, thank you so much fo sharing, I've been going through a very similar experience and it felt almost like I can't explain it, the anxiety but hunger for change, the being alone for the first time but conditioned to care for others. almost missing my chaotic childhood more than enjoying my early adulthood which was there waiting for me to enjoy, but I was very stuck. and disconnected from myself. I want to move out again soon and give it another shot and have been letting go of childhood and relationship trauma. this was beautiful and brought me closer to myself. I hope you're doing better now!
oh man, the beginning got me in tears. I can really relate. I love when you post Charli. Love n hugs.
all the love n hugs right back at ya ❤
Oh God. I don't even know how to describe what I felt watching this video. It feels like a punch but also a hug. Thank you, Gorge.
I can relate so hard, my brain would finish sentences before you did 🥲
Moving out has been the best decision I ever made and I'm so happy to be in therapy and learn to take care of myself and not make myself a slave to everyone else's needs anymore. It really changed a lot for me. And even though I'm a sucker for nostalgia, I know that I'm much better now.
I've always been a "jump into the ice-cold water right away-type of person as well. The difference between then and now is though that today I jump into this lake of uncertainty trusting myself to somehow keep swimming (haha, writting this made me think of Finding Nemo "just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming")
Anyway. Be proud of yourself! And if you ever feel in doubt or judge yourself for still being damaged, just know that you'll learn more everyday and will know yourself everyday a little better than the day before 💙
A small book recommendation because it really helped me after moving out of my traumatic past and let go of self-destructive patterns: "Self compassion" by Kristin Neff
Have a great time, I believe in you! 💙💙💙
you're getting soooo much better with the editing, the narration, the cinematography and everything with every single video!!!!! it's insane seeing you grow from the very beginning
thank you this is SO rewarding to hear ❤
i don't know how to explain it except that you feel like a friend who articulates the things i feel so well. like as if you read my mind and were like yeah fuck, we're both in the same boat. you're gonna be hugeee one day, thats for sure. take care always
First, you popped off with the video I loved every second of it and the sponsor was so slick lol.
Also, everyone’s circumstance is different! I moved away from home when I was 19 and moved back at 26 :) your journey is your own and lots of people can relate to you. Thanks for sharing!
@@a85922 I agree so much, I think it's one of the only reasons that I have been able to take the risks I have is that I have somewhere to go back to if I "fail". I'm so greatful even if I haven't had to use it yet but you never know.
I had a therapy session today where I talked about a lot of what you're talking about, and I was also trying to decide whether to move across the country. I've realized that addressing trauma and healing from it also means releasing parts of you that you didn't know you were suppressing or that you overlooked. Now that I've seen those parts of me, I can't look away and keep living the same way I have for so long. I was trying to figure out how to show my inner child that I am someone she should trust, and you're right about the actions. So, I'm going to move across the country with my partner and I'm going to put myself first now and not hold myself back anymore. Thank you for making this video.
it's amazing that you were able to decide that for yourself ❤
Thank you for this beautiful message, it inspires me. What I struggle with is cleaning, but I rather have an ache in all my body and having a clean space to gift myself, than protecting myself from the ache, and living in an unhealthy filthy house.
I'm a therapist and 31 years old and you are figuring out what I am just now figuring out...WELL DONE. you are lovely.
you just changed my life
Thank you.
I was married for 7 years, after the breakup i went back to my mom's and its just awful :L
But life is full of surprises, and hope it is for the better, i wish i could leave Brazil or be good enough for a job overseas but these kind of thoughts are too destructive.
Tho, i like your content and the shown personality, its very relatable haha. Im really glad you could move at 25 its an unique experience, a roller coaster of feelings if you must, but a great one in most cases, all the best wishes to you :D
Almost teared up listening to you describing these insane feelings of anxiety, regret, doubt, adrenaline kicking at night and not being able to sleep bc of it, thinking you're having some kind of heart attack or are about to and just wanting to have your life back, be comfortable in yourself again - I relate so hard and while I know that I'm not the only one going through things like that, it's different to actually see and hear someone else talk about it. Thank you so SO much for this, truly. 🤧
Never mind, I am tearing up 😗✌
Also, your ex therapist sounds so nice!
Charly you are such a unique soul 🥺I love that you are sharing your journey with us. Can't wait to see where life in Berlin takes you, I'm looking forward to your new videos!
thank you! I am so happy to have you here on my journey with me ❤
@@iCharlyprime Girl I've been here since your styling vids and I'm not planning on leaving! 💟
It is uncanny how much I relate to this video. It’s so comforting to hear other people going through similar things and to hear all the pain,joys, weaknesses, and strengths in their journey
Watching you from Italy. Top content as always. Thank you for sharing 🙏🏻
this was so moving... tysm
You have no idea how much i love your channel and the strength and hope it gives me 🩷
This touched me deeply. Thank you for this. It truly was beautiful and relatable in so many ways
my comfort youtuber
This hits in all the right ways … u articulated every thought I’ve had , thank u for proving ur doubt wrong so that maybe one day I can prove mine wrong too… going to study abroad for a semester and I’ve never even been on a plane by myself. Change is coming and I’m terrified but u being happier makes it seem like it’ll be worth it
I need to save this video to come back to it when in denial
Have never felt like I had so much in common with a UA-camr before haha. Was feeling all excited about a dream I'm working towards today, and something as simple as my sunglasses breaking was enough to fill me with doubt and self-hatred that I was bound to fail. But it's like you said, those voices are an illusion. Thank you! xx
I just wanna say that looking at you and listening to your thought processes I can’t help but feel that someone is gonna be extremely lucky to share a life with you one day. You have glimpses of genius and more importantly you are determined to grow out of the shit, not everyone is really growing like that, wanting to be better. I too sometimes want to stay in my little comfy shell. Keep doing you, having fun and I wish you the best. You really do feel like a good friend because you’re very real yet very funny.
i had a terrible day and this really made me feel a bit more reconnected with myself. not trying to be cheesy or smth, but i rlly appreciate you sharing this healing journey - it speaks to me on a very humane level
Without giving to much personal details, you're videos are so relatable, it is crazy. You are so great at expressing things that I also feel. And a lot of people in the comments do too, so it is kind of comforting to know that there are people out there that *do* understand. And knowing you are German too, is also weirdly comforting cause it make feel like that maybe there are other people similar to you in this country and I just have to find them. Because boy, do you seem like someone that would be a great friend to have in life. It may be weird to write that, because obviously I do not *actually* know you, but your videos seem so authentic and personal that I feel confident in that statement. Honestly, thank you for your videos. I don't know how I found you're channel but I am happy I did.
You are incredible and I feel very proud of you. Normally I wouldn't say I feel proud of someone I don't know, but from bingeing your videos these last weeks, I really feel like I resonate with so much you have been through and how your anxiety functions. I have been stuck in that whole 'is it my intuition telling me I'm doing the wrong thing because I AM doing the wrong thing or is it just my anxiety lying to me and this choice is GOOD for me?' for years now! The way you describe it - how your anxiety became deeply intwined with your inner voice to the point that your inner voice WAS your anxiety - that's me. I have lived that. I am still living that. And I feel so seen by you. So thank you, so much, for sharing such raw and vulnerable words (and footage) in your videos. It is already helping me in ways no previous videos on anxiety/'overcoming your mind blah blah blah' videos have before. I feel renewed hope for my own future...
P.s. I think one reason I have been stuck in that conflict of 'is it real or just the anxiety?' for so long is because it is really hard to admit that your mind is so against you being happy. I know it is (for most people with anxiety like myself) to keep them safe. But to put that above all else at all costs, especially my own happiness.. it's hard to accept. It's the antithesis of loving myself and believing in myself. Thanks for biting the bullet there and saying it aloud. (I know I shouldn't seek validation from others - but it's still so encouraging!). I hope you're doing okay. Keep up this amazing journey you're on x
Man, I really wish this video existed when I was about to move out again one and a half years ago. I can relate to all the bombardment your brain begins to unleash when it thinks you are about to march into danger blindly. I also got therapy for a year to ensure that I got on the right path, and didn't make the same mistake as the first time I moved out. But maybe that first mistake was what tripped me because I could not handle it. My brain was to suspicious.
Many weeks before the date I was about to move out I started to get nervous. Like really nervous. I wasn't able to do most things normally anymore, without enduring a shit ton of stress.
Then when the time came I wasn't able to handle it. I called all my close friends and even my therapist and tried to convince me to just be brave but it wasn't enough. I called it off and got depressed. Now I'm not in a good place mentally.
But now I realise that most times there is no other way but to push through and see where it takes you. When it doesn't work out you have to change course again but avoiding it doesn't solve anything. So better luck next time I guess.
I really am happy for your success and wish you all the best for the years to come!
I can relate to all of this so so much. There were also so many moments during this process in which I started doubting everything and wanted nothing more than to return to my safe shell to just be able to relax for *one* day. Being an anxious person isn't easy, so don't beat yourself up over following your instinct. Soon enough this phase will find a place in your life's story and I'm sure will be a great lesson later on ❤
20:00 the "for whatever only God knows reason" definition....iconic
I love the way you describe things cause you use a ton of metaphors (like me!!!) and it makes things easier to take in. Btw ur editing is iconic and so fun go skillshare
thank you. i never thought that another person can relate that much as you did to my current emotional state and life changing situation. I moved across countries to end up in Germany and now i'm trying to get my life together. I thought i wanted to get my old self back, but turned out it never was me. All this years i was just a summ of every f* thought of other people about me, their myths and their definitions of me. Now i feel like in a boat in an open ocean free to explore. Is it overwhelming? Yes it is. Am i terrified? jeez sometimes i want to wake up and realise that this new cool life i started to discover was just a dream and I'm back at my sh* old life when i was continuously destroying myself. Will i give up? i wish not..? anyway, love you so much, your video was like a breath of fresh spring air. Bye gorge!
I always watch your videos and then I actually don't know what they are about all of a sudden, but at the end, they make so much sense. and I guess that sumps it up. love from a fellow german.
This is a fantastic video 👏👏👏👏👏👏🎬
Thank you so much for sharing your journey! It’s so helpful 🙏
thank *you* for watching, it's what makes it possible for me to keep doing these videos ;)
I love this video ❤
O.M.G! So Relatable! Thank you for making this video! I loved how you incorporated the skill share Ad. Talking to your past self that edited your video, classic. Very original and creative.
This is incredible! I’m about to make a move to another part of my country for no real reason other than that I want to move and get out of my hometown- I’m going to trust my decision a bit more thanks to you
and what got me was the 'at first I was driving the car now im in the passengerseat and someone that looks like me is driving and won't let me know where to or why' not exactly what you said but it felt very accurate. feeling like a part of you you don't know or understand yet is leading. like the adult you're becoming has got you but you're yet to know her and understand her and trust her. that hit me so hard. I hope to not sit in the passengerseat cluelessly anymore. I want to trust myself to drive and navigate and know where I am going. owning up to that selfresposibility we owe ourselves has been soooo hard. for me at least. ugh I thought im going to watch a fun cute video I didn't expect to relate this deeply and now im so glad this is not a solitary experience. growth hurts but its worth it. and knowing ourselves is key.
Hello :) great video! Love it
The editing is fabulous✨ GIRLLLLLL! You look AMAZING! Congrats on the new place. This series is my happy place like frfr. 💙 (Ps. Can't wait for more)
omg thank you, makes me very happy to hear that this is your happy place ☺
Dude, you rock! You are doing it!! I'm the opposite, I had no real anxiety about moving out and having my own place somewhere new, but the idea of driving my own moving van in a new city is just NOPE :*D And frankly I'm terrified of flying, which you've done! Driving in general scared the sh*t out of me when I first learned, and kind of still does tbh. Anxiety is personal and doesn't make sense lol :D We're getting thru it together!!
"My anxiety has so much room to grow" - I felt this SO much🙃
Yesterday I was reflecting about this exact topic, people talk about change constantly so you become a certain version of yourself. But there’s so much grief in change, you die a little, but you become YOU a little more too. It’s a very odd and emotional process.
I'm rewatching this after one month… I'm planning to move to another country in a few months, and your video doesn't just speak to me-it shouts. Sometimes I'm afraid, sometimes I'm excited; other times, I spend an hour asking myself if I'm just delusional for leaving everything behind and making that jump without a safety net. But watching you makes me feel calm, like everything is going to work out. I'm less scared of facing the discomfort of trying to write my own story.
I'm working on changing my life rn too. Reading All About Love by Bell Hooks was a great starting point for me, i highly recommend it!
This gives me bestdressed vibes and I love it
She’s the closest thing to filling the bestdressed shaped hole in my heart tbh
Thank you for sharing, I am 33, done some stuff already, but after some injuries I got back where i was before. I hope you never do my mistake - if you feel like you cant do it ( in the future,) seek help cause going back to toxic place was the worst what I could do. Please call your ex-therapist when you will feel "loosing". Berlin was my of my goals, but did not make it.
It helps so much watching you on your journey. Like a comfy chat. Außerdem Galigrü ausm Ländle :)
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
idk if it's cause i'm on my period but i'm full on, sobbing crying throwing up
actually panicking about a last minute decision and wondering if i should fuck around and find out or stay in my comfort zone helppp
You have great music taste :D
thank you!
Love you're energy. ❤
She is Energy
haha thank you so much ☺
@@allyson--hahaha
The typo 🥲
tolles Video ❤️
danke dir ❤
Let pain and growth be the excavators, digging down into the core of who you really are inside, which is pure, unconditional love for others, but most importantly, for yourself ❤
I trust you, too
sorry this sounds co-dependent, it's just that right now I'm only capable of completely turning off my brain and awareness of my free will and just take in everything you're saying
but at some point a little past the middle of your video, I felt that way
Not that it helps much in my self development, but it's nice to see someone who's that self aware and trying, like really fucking trying to make changes, when I just feel like giving up and completely surrendering myself to my problems and degenerate
Is that mexican music (a corrido) you put in your video?! 😮 😊 im mexican and i kept pausing and rewinding "like is the for reals" hahaha love it
Ich hab irgendwie gar nicht gewusst dass du deutsch bist. Dieses Video hat mir grade irgendwie so gut getan, weil ich mich original in der gleichen Situation befinde. Ziehe grade auch in ne andere Stadt und erfinde mich bisschen neu und stelle mich meinen Ängsten, aber es ist so hart. Hab auch ne Angststörung, die mich auch die ganze Zeit davon abhalten will Dinge zu tun, die ich tun will. Und dann denk ich auch immer das es meine Intuition ist, obwohls nur meine Angst ist.
und das was du grade über deinen Ex gesagt hast, trifft auch komplett auf meinen zu lol.
naja bisschen viel Info für einen UA-cam Kommentar, aber es war grad schön zu wissen dass andere Menschen ähnlich ticken wie ich :D
es ist leicht der Angst zu glauben wenn sie einem einredet 'you're the only person that feels *this* bad' aber man muss sich bewusst sein, dass es da draussen immer Milliarden von Menschen gibt denen es genau wie dir geht. Also keine Sorge, bin nicht die einzige die das selbe Gehirn wie du hat ;)
❤!
Hello friends. I've been following along with charly's process for a while now and I am starting to realize that I don't really know what I want anymore. I know my values and work to incorporate them more deeply, but I am beginning to doubt my passion for hobbies, schooling and potential careers. Everything sounds too exhausting to do now, so how can I believe that future me will be as excited as younger me was? With that uncertainty, how can I be happy knowing that I am not moving forward in those things, treading water to stay afloat instead of getting to the destination?
10:28 this is very Sarah-core
I just binged all your Rewriting Me episodes tonight and I wanted to say I'm so happy to have found your channel 🥹 For the longest time I've been in denial about feeling burnt out and insecure, but watching your videos helped me realize I can still move forward and reach my dreams. Thank you so much for sharing your journey and I wish you all the best 🥹💗🫶
Omy god damn.... like didnt watxged vuedio. But i know u wont disappint me❤
The Spanish music was such a nice surprise 😅
I was asking myself the questions you're asking years ago and I remember going through almost the same hardships (anxiety, fear, loneliness..) but now alhamdulilah it's all good. I genuinely wish you try to read Quran and learn about Islam and its perspective towards us as human beings and what is life and why we're here and where we're going. Especially how it guides us through life whether dealing with ourselves or outer circumstances. In the Quran there's the answer to everything and I sincerely hope you find the peace within yourself when you do it. Love your videos by the way, great editing 👌🏼
What is the song in the background??? I love it
Schönes Video und dir eine gute Zeit in Berlin! An sich eventuell komische Frage, aber glaubst du dass sich so ein „Narrativ zum Selbst“ aufbauen hilft? Ganz liebe Grüße 🌻
what's the song in 14:31? thank you!
7:15 past you: the one that does the work to make sure you are all set up
11:27 future you: listens to a healthy inner voice and says “you know what, I’m just gonna have to do this to you”
Hi Charly, i just read the war of art. If you didn’t read it i would absolutly suggest it to you :)
I'll look it up, thank you!!
Craving a new video.... ☕️ 😗
❤
ohhhh I didn't know you live in Germany :D I live in Leipzig, I would love to be friends with you.
Which sounds creepy, haha. I am 25 too and going through heartbreak at the moment and reinventing myself, so I just can relate to you so much
reinventing yourself is always an amazing idea ❤
"i didn't feel at home because i am not a home to myself" ??! jesus
sometimes anxiety makes you spit some sick bars
You sound so american! Aber bist du aus Deutschland? Ich bin verwirrt :D Habe deinen Kanal vor kurzem entdeckt und bin sehr begeistert.
I'm curious, are you German? :) (sorry if I am mistaken)
Wait a goddammed second you lived in Frankfurt until this past October? I could have gone to a meet and greet or something? We drink coffee in the same Uni... Whaaaat?
.... I am having a legitimate mental breakdown.
I finished the video and related so hard it was kind of creepy. The main difference being that while this city might have been your cage it is my gateway to freedom. Just turned 24 this past month, hopefully will be able to jump ship before 25. Good luck in Berlin 🩵
I've never seen a girl make content like this. Nice :)
Im a couple years older than you and I always forget that I moved out of my parents house pretty early; every time someone talks about that I'm like "aw but everyone lives with their parents until then". I am studying at uni again and a classmate was telling me all her anxieties and I told her OMG that was EXACTLY how I felt, wait how old are you? she's 23.... so I had to be like hmmmm yeah idk what to tell you being 23 sucked ;_; I'm not sure what I have learned, but I do feel much better now than I did at 23-25. I made a big move and I'm still not sure what the 'right' decision was, but you know what, I'm totally fine either way, the world didn't end actually! "the amount of calories I burned just from laying down worrying was probably enough for me to be labeled a green energy source" hmmm yes I can relate 🥹
watched this in such a timely manner😵💫🥲 this was lovely, Charly! and I feel you too:') I'm a graduating senior from college and life feels so..fast? yet it felt like I've lived so....slow? these past years in uni (which is crazy!!)
the idea of living and moving out in my family seems so foreign, but it's that very space of not fully knowing yet wanting to explore a life out there that brought me peace and comfort. thank u for this.