let's be real: are you insecure? - here's how to *actually* become SUSTAINABLY confident in 2024

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  • Опубліковано 30 тра 2024
  • The first 500 people to use my link will get a 1 month free trial of Skillshare skl.sh/icharly02241
    other socials: @iCharlyprime
    hi guys!! So so happy to be back and bring you the 4 steps to confidence that helped me immensely in understanding how confidence even works and consists of!! I hope these tips help you as much as it did me, I love you, goodbyyye!!!
    0:00-1:01 you've been looking for confidence in the wrong places
    1:02-4:03 stick to the promises you make yourself
    4:04-7:13 how to stop feeling like an imposter
    7:14-9:00 social media isn't always right
    9:01-12:38 grieve your old self
    12:39-13:22 et voila: how I became sustainably confident
    how to stop being insecure
    how to find yourself
    how to be yourself in 2024
    how to be yourself
    how I became authentic
    how I started to love myself
    why I love myself
    how I became so confident
    why I am confident
    new years resolution 2024
    why new years resolutions suck
    why new years resolutions never work
    how to set sustainable goals
    how to achieve all of your dream goals
    how to know who you are
    how to make 2024 your year
    how to make 2024 the best year of your life
    why you need to celebrate your growth
    how to grow as a person
    why you need to script your life
    why you need core moral values
    how to set core moral values
    how to change your life
    how to actually change your life in 2024
    how to sustainably change your life
    how to use the butterfly effect
    why you should script your life
    why scripting works
    how to write your life's script
    how to stop daydreaming
    how to make your dreams come true fast
    how to be yourself
    how to know who you are
    how to be authentically you
    body neutrality
    body confidence
    how to be myself
    limerence
    obsessing over fictional characters
    how to stop obsessing over fictional men
    how to stop coping with daydreaming
    daydreaming coping mechanism
    how to stop escaping reality
    impact theory
    101 sustainable goal setting guide
  • Розваги

КОМЕНТАРІ • 130

  • @Tenafotena
    @Tenafotena 3 місяці тому +218

    “If I am worth anything later, I am worth something now” that was great🎉

  • @tanihrt
    @tanihrt 3 місяці тому +194

    thank you for making self development actually doable ( with real actionable steps instead of some vague advice ) and entertaining i love you

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +12

      thank you for saying this, it makes me so happy to hear that the stuff I produce is helping others ❤🌞

  • @tanvi.ra.1480
    @tanvi.ra.1480 3 місяці тому +63

    " My body is an instrument , not an art project” well said 💯👏

  • @hazellevesque692
    @hazellevesque692 Місяць тому +4

    The crying over the "it'll pass" scene in Fleabag at 3 am in the morning was real

  • @e.m.6536
    @e.m.6536 3 місяці тому +60

    I stopped white-lying when I was in high school and in my mid-twenties I can confirm this is actually a very practical life policy. Your friends, colleagues and employers really appreciate honesty when it comes to occasional "sorry, I was really tired and overslept my appointment" because it shows that if you're not ashamed to admit such small things, you (potentially) are also not prone to bigger lies about yourself. Also it helps to show a more humane and rellatable side of yourself so that people around you also stop white-lying to you, because they feel like because you don't judge yourself about small things you will not judge them

  • @afrofaeries
    @afrofaeries 3 місяці тому +34

    Deleting my social media (Twitter, TikTok, Snap, Facebook, Instagram) literally uplifted my mental health and self image. Now I only have UA-cam, Discord for messaging, and Pinterest. It’s psychologically mind blowing ❤

  • @alexyssaubrie1606
    @alexyssaubrie1606 3 місяці тому +88

    This video was so helpful! I asked a therapist once how to be more confident and she told me to watch the movie “I feel pretty” with Amy Schumer, so thank you for being more thought provoking than an actual licensed professional! (I did watch the movie and it didn’t help)
    I’ve found myself always wanting to review things “good” or “bad” and this is a nice reminder that we don’t need to. I’m having to start over and thank you for a realistic view on life. Part of it for me is that I have to grieve a world that doesn’t exist anymore. A lot of the goals I have don’t seem possible, like owning a house. But I’m ready to finally show off my talents and no longer want to be afraid of being seen.

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +9

      Never fear being seen!! Sending you all the love and thank you so so much for leaving this lovely comment, it fills me with pure joy to read stuff like this ❤

    • @plasticfrog4533
      @plasticfrog4533 3 місяці тому +11

      omg that's wild, I think I'd actually laugh if my therapist said that

    • @allyson--
      @allyson-- 3 місяці тому +6

      Shaking my head @ that licensed professional

    • @tutaserene
      @tutaserene 3 місяці тому +8

      i’d sue my therapist if she recommended me an amy schummer movie 😭

    • @justabout6979
      @justabout6979 Місяць тому

      so happy for you!

  • @safichii
    @safichii 3 місяці тому +32

    Was shedding some good -ol tears from this about grieving over deep buried teen dreams I had been holding onto. I'm so surprised of how until this video, I had been both holding on to as well as comparing my current self to them constantly EVERYDAY! AND I HAD NO IDEA I WAS DOING THAT! It's quite miraculous, like I feel like I've been carrying a invisible sack full of heavy rocks on my back and only now to realise I don't have to carry them if I don't want to.. man didn't expect this to hit so deep...Sending deep gratitude for all your time to craft this video 🌼🌿

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +8

      it truly fulfils me to read stuff like this, thank you for being here and giving yourself the chance to let go of this heavy burden ❤

  • @nuttynoshie
    @nuttynoshie 3 місяці тому +33

    12:30 yes yes yes to this section! I just recently started saying “I do not need the comforts of my past in order to thrive” as an affirmation to myself - this video really couldn’t have come at a more perfect time to confirm that :)

  • @toni2309
    @toni2309 3 місяці тому +19

    I have lately heard about the idea of insecurity vs confidence to understand those words to actually look at the meaning of them. That insecurity is about being unsure, and confidence about being able to trust in an outcome. That blew my mind because it finally explained why people saw me as insecure. I never knew, because the talk about insecurity vs confidence seemed never about that.
    Now I feel like I don't want to be confident. I'm pretty comfortable with being unsure.

  • @Aurelia2147
    @Aurelia2147 20 днів тому +1

    I think what is so hard for me with ADHD is that I know I cannot rely on myself. I have definitely ways that make it easier for me to go through with things but they are not a 100% fix. I get distracted way too easily and my worst enemy is my phone and doom scrolling. Dopamine deficiency sucks. I can literally feel when my dopamine level drop after i.e. deep cleaning for an hour or two and whatever I started becomes near impossible to finish.
    I hope I can find ways to be more reliable in the future but that first one really hit me...
    Being self-compassionate in these moments is so hard and holding myself to a good amount of accountablity even harder

  • @clau6972
    @clau6972 3 місяці тому +6

    Oh this is also something i learned in therapy. Tresting yourself like you would treat your best friend ever, or the person you love most in the world, is really useful for many things!!

  • @baddie_dar
    @baddie_dar 3 місяці тому +8

    I love how color coordinated this video is

  • @aell.e
    @aell.e 3 місяці тому +8

    I almost skipped the last few seconds, as valuable as the rest of the video.

  • @BAR0N48
    @BAR0N48 4 дні тому

    This cideo really helped me open my eyes to loving myself
    From what I learnt over my 5 years of struggling with mental health
    1. Be yourself: when you put on a persona, the only progress you make on improvment goes towards the persona, not you
    2. Try your absolute best to see the positive in everything, even a bad situation. This will reinforce that you doing something right and you will want to keep trying
    3. Dont struggle with yourself: dont be negative towards yourself. I like to think we are actually 2 people and not one. The mind and the body. So treat yourself the way you want to be treated.
    4. Seek therapy: getting your thoughts out in an unfiltered way will really help. If you can afford a therapist, write them down in a book.

  • @BonBonHassan
    @BonBonHassan 21 день тому

    Telling the truth 24/7 is my biggest issue but my number one goal

  • @rafaellarocha4732
    @rafaellarocha4732 2 місяці тому +7

    You have no idea how much i needed this

  • @honeycheesechips
    @honeycheesechips 8 днів тому

    I used to faked my confidence with social media mantras and perspectives. It really worked until it doesn’t anymore. It crumbled so fucking fast when I was triggered by things out of my control. I didn’t have a solid foundation. I still don’t but I’m building it little by little. _Just respect today_ I’m heavily leaning on _respect_ Someone said _I can’t love, accept myself yet. But I have to respect myself_ And it stuck with me ever since.

  • @lonelywife7468
    @lonelywife7468 2 місяці тому +2

    That outro was pure serotonin

  • @aquilliusranger2137
    @aquilliusranger2137 3 місяці тому +3

    This is also why my friend group had to stop a friend from rambling on about her plannings, when in reality it’s better to find liked-minded people who shares your struggles and know when those flaws of yours and others should be addressed in a healthier way, if we were all brutally honest to each others, EVERYONE would get immediately hurt, so it’s best to resolve the situation either immediately or even just at a later point instead of hiding it away.
    That is how you build healthy relationships, to work both through the good and the bad to find the strength and the flaw of your relationship as well. If you were to repress everything, if you were to be apathetic to everything you cared about them, then you might as well let the bridge rot, and not even burn it.

  • @dc_rocker
    @dc_rocker 3 місяці тому +7

    this is so much better than those videos that are like "feel bad about yourself? just don't! 🙂" thank you!

  • @talz.3357
    @talz.3357 3 місяці тому +15

    i genuinely love u you’re so smart

  • @laurajaneg
    @laurajaneg 3 місяці тому +1

    watching the "it'll pass"-scene from fleabag at 3 am - I felt offensively called out haha

  • @HollyBean77
    @HollyBean77 3 місяці тому +6

    We really like you today too ❤❤ also as a tall big nose girly with a deep voice, you tell ‘em bishhhh

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +6

      I’ll tell ‘em as long as you do too!!! ❤️❤️❤️

    • @spacebar9733
      @spacebar9733 3 місяці тому +2

      Oh this must be our support group, hi yall 🩷

  • @aquilliusranger2137
    @aquilliusranger2137 3 місяці тому +4

    I’m not really apart of the masses though since I’m quite a contrarian myself, but I did loved ATLA. The reason I also followed you was because your video blew up and I actually like your style of video.

  • @movsess
    @movsess 3 місяці тому +1

    the only youtuber who's videos i watch on playback speed 0.75 instead of 1.25

  • @lyaloverr
    @lyaloverr 3 місяці тому

    i loveeee your content so much!!

  • @salmareads
    @salmareads 3 місяці тому +3

    love youu girly😘

  • @sarahe6629
    @sarahe6629 3 місяці тому +2

    i loveeee your video/editing style

  • @madeleineclement2764
    @madeleineclement2764 3 місяці тому +1

    THATS SO GOOD

  • @inacave1
    @inacave1 3 місяці тому

    this was incredible. thank you!

  • @alexyssaubrie1606
    @alexyssaubrie1606 3 місяці тому +10

    Love this thumbnail! ❤

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +5

      thank you!! thumbnails are always the hardest part for me, so it’s nice to hear that people like them haha

    • @alexyssaubrie1606
      @alexyssaubrie1606 3 місяці тому +4

      The pop of red is really striking and definitely ties everything together 😊

  • @dasmoex
    @dasmoex 3 місяці тому

    Just love it 🎉❤

  • @Dream_Sailor
    @Dream_Sailor 2 місяці тому

    This is on point

  • @hathorsheathen
    @hathorsheathen 2 місяці тому

    I'm so glad I found your channel ❤

  • @ajsjs9
    @ajsjs9 3 місяці тому

    this is actually a really beautiful video. thank u girl

  • @angie2043
    @angie2043 3 місяці тому +2

    i love your videos so much, they've kinda become a safe space for me when I'm not feeling my best

  • @phoesmi
    @phoesmi 2 місяці тому +1

    you are so good! how are you so good! ily!

  • @hell.en18
    @hell.en18 2 місяці тому

    What an amazing video!!! Thank u, Gorge.

  • @SidraTulMuntaha1234
    @SidraTulMuntaha1234 3 місяці тому +1

    Very helpful ❤❤❤❤

  • @pameladenicolo3300
    @pameladenicolo3300 3 місяці тому +1

    Everything was alright. Then you put the "it'll pass" scene from Fleabag in the video and no Charly, I'm not feeling okay again :)

  • @dzhiae
    @dzhiae 2 місяці тому

    an absolute gem ❤ loved the takeaways of the video 😊

  • @notruetwo
    @notruetwo 2 місяці тому

    You’re a genius, Gorge

  • @marielei90
    @marielei90 3 місяці тому

    Loved this video! You have great insights and a really great and unique style of storytelling ❤.

  • @kiki-qp7jx
    @kiki-qp7jx Місяць тому

    this video is so powerful. for once actual good advice that is implementable and meaningful, not just another “work out and journal or something” video.

  • @katttea
    @katttea 3 місяці тому

    Ohhhh this video is amazing so happy to meet it exactly now! You are the best, this mechanisms are so complicated to be faced and verbalized!

  • @mort47
    @mort47 3 місяці тому

    your'e such an inspiration. thank you for sharing your process and wise words, it resonates very deeply.

  • @samwood9706
    @samwood9706 3 місяці тому +1

    you're pretty cool. I love your filming, editing, humor and content :D let's stay confident about ourselves

  • @kaylee201x
    @kaylee201x 3 місяці тому +1

    I don’t usually comment on videos, but I just wanted to say how much I LOVE and APPRECIATE you making these videos!!
    They’ve really helped me get out of this funk I’ve been in, so thank you! 💖

  • @sophiasframeli
    @sophiasframeli 2 місяці тому

    I LOVE YOU I LOVE THIS VIDEO I LOVE THIS LOOK

  • @June_diaryy
    @June_diaryy 2 місяці тому

    this is some solid advice!! you are so wise & articulate, i appreciate this video sm it rlly resonated with me ❤

  • @sambadivilleroine6083
    @sambadivilleroine6083 3 місяці тому

    The grieve yourself part got me

  • @yellowscarf9239
    @yellowscarf9239 2 місяці тому

    I love your channel and your videos. You make sense. Thanks. a lot

  • @erinburke6169
    @erinburke6169 3 місяці тому

    That letter to yourself was beautiful. Thank you for this video!!

  • @ren-lvr
    @ren-lvr 2 місяці тому

    i feel crazy watching your videos because i relate so hard to everything you say and i feel like im in a similar spot as you! thanks for your videos i love how authentic you are

  • @IzuAurora
    @IzuAurora 3 місяці тому +5

    The ending of this video 🥹♥️♥️ I aspire to one day be in that place mentally and I'm grateful for all the things you are doing and have done to help me even if it's just to not feel alone in these thoughts and showing there's a way out.

  • @helenp703
    @helenp703 3 місяці тому +1

    This is truly some of the most refreshing and resonating words of advice I've ever come across, I'll practice!

  • @jazmineutubes
    @jazmineutubes 3 місяці тому +1

    Your videos bring me so much joy, peace, and reassurance. I’m glad that you’re part of my healing journey. Thank you, gorge! Love you, gorge ❤

  • @chelseacounsell
    @chelseacounsell 2 місяці тому

    Wow I did not expect this to hit me as hard as it did. Damn.

  • @maddoxnous4047
    @maddoxnous4047 3 місяці тому

    Your videos veel so healing. After i watch one I'm always just able to put my phone down and do what i need to do. You really make the Internet a better place.❤

  • @jessicabirkeland1580
    @jessicabirkeland1580 3 місяці тому +1

    The editing of this video!❤

  • @danaLikesBuidcuits
    @danaLikesBuidcuits 3 місяці тому +2

    Thank you for existing, seriously. Ever since I stumbled across your channel my life’s just been so much better. So thank you for making those incredible aesthetic and helpful videos. Much love :))))

  • @jayana2
    @jayana2 3 місяці тому +1

    this was SUPER relatable and helpful for me. Thank you for giving such great wisdom and actionable guidance to something Ive always struggled with!!

  • @rafaellarocha4732
    @rafaellarocha4732 2 місяці тому

    Thank you thank you thank you

  • @julieperez7505
    @julieperez7505 3 місяці тому +1

    this was such a great video. you get straight to the point and provide simple actionable steps, all while entertaining us 😜💕 QUEEN! what can’t she do 💕

  • @adenosinemyass
    @adenosinemyass 3 місяці тому +1

    I already love your content, I've had the exact same problem so thank you for sharing these tips. This one video is really helpful in a way that others video lack, it is not forceful and it feels so natural. In a world where lies are almost everywhere, something like this is very special. To accept yourself without regrets. Once again, thank you for posting this video and keep up your great work!

  • @justabout6979
    @justabout6979 Місяць тому +1

    you are dropping bombs this whole video. How do you come up with this stuff. Thank you so much!!

  • @user-xj8dh9fp8r
    @user-xj8dh9fp8r 3 місяці тому

    off topic but your hands are soo pretty uwu

  • @minimar55677
    @minimar55677 3 місяці тому

    I'm happy that I stumbled on your channel. A lot of your videos have been so helpful to me now that I'm in this new stage of my life. I wonder though, what if that letter or mantra is towards someone that is not you? What would you write then?

  • @Lavinia_Garcia
    @Lavinia_Garcia 2 місяці тому

    Your editing, lighting, makeup, hair, outfits AND advice are allll so on point, like damn gurl 💅: congrats, I just subscribed and can't wait to see and hear more from you, but also I wish you the best in your journey to your own existential version of Uncle Iroh's teashop 😉❤️

  • @EricB256
    @EricB256 3 місяці тому

    Thanks for doing the work. You are quite amazing. Congrats.

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +1

      All I do is give you the information on which path I'd recommend, but the person you need to thank is yourself bc YOU'RE the one putting in the work!! ❤

  • @kaisa1476
    @kaisa1476 3 місяці тому

    And now I'm grieving that I didn't know all this at 25 but had to wait until I'm 40. Funny how you can always find points of comparison if you just keep your eyes open. (PS. I love whatever you are doing with your hair, even if you don't know what to do with it.)

  • @lcu.1
    @lcu.1 3 місяці тому +1

    thanks for explaining your own thoughts about this topic, and not only repeating and summarizing everything that is already out there. When I feel low I tend to watch a lot of those selfhelp videos. After I finished with one I always feel a bit unsatisfied and watch another one and so on. This time I kind of feel refreshed and clear and gonna close my laptop now. Thanks for being authentic! Ps love that you include fleabag and avatar in your videos, huge green flag

  • @sambadivilleroine6083
    @sambadivilleroine6083 3 місяці тому

    I relate so bad to the points at 9:34

  • @reganshalome7438
    @reganshalome7438 3 місяці тому +4

    Thank you for spreading your light with the world :,)

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +1

      thank *you* for being here to receive it!! ❤

  • @tairinjane
    @tairinjane 3 місяці тому +1

    Your curls are really pretty though

  • @strawdoll
    @strawdoll 3 місяці тому +1

    That quote was amazing and i feel like it broke down a big wall in my mind. Thankyou for your videos! Have you heard of the book the Artists Way? It seems like you've reached some of the steps it lays out, and might have some more tools that will be helpful!

  • @LaytonObserves
    @LaytonObserves 3 місяці тому

    You didn't have to go this hard with the c r e a t i v i t y, but I am so grateful you did

  • @milaces1323
    @milaces1323 3 місяці тому +2

    Girl, your editing skills are insane and also you're giving very sound advice. Keep it ip! 🩷

  • @tut2506
    @tut2506 3 місяці тому +1

    That hit deeper than I expected and I am greatful for every second of it. Probably need to rewatch it like 5 times to truly take every word in.. Thank you:)

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +1

      I am grateful that you're giving yourself the grace to take care of yourself, thank you for that!! ❤

  • @arianeguima3633
    @arianeguima3633 3 місяці тому +3

    crying because i loved this vídeo so só much ❤

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому

      thank you, I love you so só much ;;) ❤️

  • @konezummmi
    @konezummmi 3 місяці тому

    girl i love you, u so smart and beautiful. thank you for sharing always ✧˖*°࿐

  • @susanaescavil
    @susanaescavil 3 місяці тому +1

    Girl, this video has found me in one of my deepest moments and has help me inmensly! Just know that you have made a Spanish girl cry but also be hopeful for tomorrow ☺️
    Tons of love and keep up with the videos, they are pieces of art!! ♥️♥️

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +2

      Sending tons of love, support, strength and courage back to you!! Letting yourself feel all the things is a wonderful first step ❤

  • @at.margos
    @at.margos 2 місяці тому +1

    Change can be hard and being able to accept yourself and be more secure with yourself as well as your surroundings can sometimes seem incredibly impossible. But first steps, as hard they may be, need to be taken, because nothing comes from nothing. I love your advice and I think your take can help a lot of people to start viewing themselves in a more positive light. I feel very uplifted after watching this. Thank you for your service, Gorge.

    • @sufi497
      @sufi497 2 місяці тому

      Love the way you worded it! "Nothing comes from nothing." I wrote that down, honestly sums up everything so well

  • @user-vl9kb3eq3e
    @user-vl9kb3eq3e 3 місяці тому +1

    I have got a big nose as well !!

  • @isydoyle
    @isydoyle 2 місяці тому

    “I am dissatisfied.” My mantra.

  • @kristinamoore8782
    @kristinamoore8782 3 місяці тому +1

    Watching your videos make me feel like your going to therapy for me 😂😅
    Thanks you for your content, your advice is GOLD

    • @iCharlyprime
      @iCharlyprime  3 місяці тому +1

      just trying to save people from making the same mistakes as me haha

  • @jngk24
    @jngk24 2 місяці тому

    You may be the eldest daughter but you are MY eldest sister!
    Keep going you're amazing gorge

  • @rafaellarocha4732
    @rafaellarocha4732 2 місяці тому

    Thanks again 12:59

  • @wertyfgu-hiomp
    @wertyfgu-hiomp 3 місяці тому

    What are your thoughts on makeup? Just curious as a gal who used to refuse to go to school without it and now hasn't worn it in years

  • @Emma-vk9ts
    @Emma-vk9ts 2 місяці тому

    OMG where does your red tights comes frOm ?♥️🌷

  • @solvamstudio
    @solvamstudio 3 місяці тому

    If I watch enough of these something will give right?

  • @serenalandolina8974
    @serenalandolina8974 3 місяці тому

    First! 💓

  • @Aphrodite-474
    @Aphrodite-474 3 місяці тому +4

    I love this series so much!!

  • @metaDeWeta
    @metaDeWeta 3 місяці тому

    i love your videos and i also think you might be neurodivergent and also very pretty

  • @lisamarie1629
    @lisamarie1629 3 місяці тому +1

    can I be your friend? Such a good videooo

  • @prince.c8458
    @prince.c8458 2 місяці тому

    🙏

  • @sambadivilleroine6083
    @sambadivilleroine6083 3 місяці тому

    10:31 got my eyes stinging a little

  • @maddoxnous4047
    @maddoxnous4047 3 місяці тому

  • @CoolGutrun
    @CoolGutrun 3 місяці тому +3

    Part 4 do be hitting hard as a trans person with how distinct my old and new selves are in the most literal sense. Great video!