Most folks are sadly merely surface lvl & our society actually promotes surface lvl perspective thinking BS. Instead of true critical thinking & diving deep beyond the mere surface lvl. Hell telling folks to actually look at themselves in the mirror might as well be some sorta new hate speech from the way folks be defensively reacting
@@anaibarangan4908 You're basically just talking and talking about yourself when no one asked. You probably need to listen more and make it less about you
I'm the conquer and deceive you type. "The fact is that a man who wants to act virtuously in every way necessarily comes to grief among so many who are not virtuous." -Machiavelli
Painful to admit but yes if you've been betrayed by your own family you can never trust people and you keep yourself guarded in the slightest sign of betrayal or even before it. Of course that doesn't mean people don't turn on you any chance they got. Sometimes just because it's fun no other reason at all. These really go hand in hand 😢
I’m reminded of the chicken & egg problem. It seems we can only learn about the world through others before we attempt to have others see it through ours. Seeing does require more than eyes but I don’t think we see them as we are exactly. It’s the concert of both that ultimately unify what we see or others see. In the end, we see. But even then we don’t.
@@elisemiller13 eliseee dear you are in hurry to make judgements I see, you should know I wasn't talking about myself, I listen actually and pay close attention because I'm not a kid anymore. But you still have a lot to learn it seems
Soon, there is going to be the rapture. It's when there will be trumpet sounds, and after the trumpet sounds, God will lift his people from here. Also, God said people should be living by the Bible. Amen, and God bless you. 1. ❤* John 3:16 - "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have eternal life". ❤
“Always assume the person you’re doing business with is trying to rip you off because most likely they are and if they aren’t, you can be pleasantly surprised.” -Steve Martin as Julian Dell
How do u operate like this without putting people in negative boxes and thinking the worst of others constantly? It doesn't seem like a good way to live, seems rather soul sucking, tho it doesn't serve to be gullible either but ijdk how can one achieve the balance in being wary without being paranoid and pessimistic
@@getgot3461 that’s a great concern. And that all comes down to protecting your downside. I get paid before services are delivered and not after. The second I spot a red flag with a woman, I’m gone. And if I get the feeling a friend, is not looking after my best interest, I cut them off. This is probably why I love my life and the people I surround myself with, and I’m not complaining about this disloyalty, cheating, jealous friends, etc. Your time, attention and affection is the most important thing in the entire world. I don’t want you to waste it.
@@getgot3461The solution is simply to unsugar coatedly understand actual reality & the nature of man or us humans. Which literally says or strongly indicates that the average person in general is a selfish lil piece of crap that is out for themselves or themselves & small circle who also sadly on average can't be trusted like that. Or the basic fact that we live in a world where man has adopted ideologies such as it's a dog eat dog world bc it actually is & why is it so? Bc man has willingly adopted it for himself. Long story short unsugar coatedly facing & understanding the true nature of things in general usually clears up the confusion as well as allows one to see & move objectively accordingly. Instead of holding on to & moving off of ones own subjective right or wrong personal opinions & feelings
@@getgot3461it is hard but with practice you can train yourself to just keep reflecting until you hit that point of neutrality with yourself like , " does how I perceive this situation actually matter, and if so what will solve my situation, be as direct to yourself and others as possible once you realise what you need, always show consideration of others and their time and you will earn the necessary respect to help solve your problems and have the trust in you that you can solve theirs too
That's a pretty bad example. You have to trust people in order to live a fulfilling life. However, if they don't have integrity, you are not responsible for that.
Wise advice for narcissists who need to break free. The empath needs to be very careful when relating to others pain. The challenge is compartmentalization in the pain of others.
@@waleedimtiaz9994precisely, which is why an aspect of our nature includes curiosity; other wise, why would we value knowledge, or our ability to apply knowledge in practicality. Why do we like building and categorizing and collecting? Memories, relationships, financial pursuits, personal goals; we are simply searching for, defining, and finding out who we are ourselves; as such, how could we possibly expect to duly and completely know someone else? When our knowledge, perspectives, physical form, and mental capabilities are all known to be limited, how could we possibly assert to know anyone or anything as truly?
I chose to see the good on people, don't let anyone use divisions and fears to lock you in yourself. Life is beautiful experience it with all has to offer.
I think the message here is more about how much (or little) you engage in getting to actually know you're closest, and yourself in a way.. not that much about how many you can rely on.. maybe we all felt more trust if we actually knew the people closest to us better❤❤❤ Important message i think ❤❤❤️
I try my best to never make assumptions of other people but rather get to know them and understand their way to see things. I always been like this cause we all have problems and we all want to bee seen, heard, felt so I always do my best to offer that to others
I don't know how about other people,but when i see a person,my first impression turns to be correct later on. Their behavioural patern show i was right most of the time
Seek and be understanding, because understanding is always better than assuming, and knowing is better than believing. But completely understanding another human being is essentially impossible.
This is a terrifying but also relieving piece of wisdom. Thank you Robert i have never been so self aware before since i started watching you're videos i have been able to navigate relationships with family and people in general im grateful to be able to learn more and more from you also the way you deliver in a captivating way. Much appreciated and best wishes.
That’s why communication is key ! Deep Listening and Honesty! I always have to tell my boyfriend “I don’t need you to give me advice or try to fix this”. Just listen to me . If I want advice or help I’ll ask after and be very clear about what I want. No person can be exactly “in your shoes”. We do t know what someone is feeling and yes we all project images onto other people. GREAT VIDEO!
Yes. And this video speaks to why...conversation could be so much more than small talk. If we really are interested in who the other person is, and seek to know more than or own projections.
No amount of conversation matters!!!!!! And no matter how well you listen to others. And ask good questions. And you have great self knowledge. Work with them. Live with them for years. NO ONE REALLY KNOWS ANYONE ELSE!!!! Brother or sister. Parents. Kids. Sponse. You don’t know them! And they don’t know you!! 😅
people with authority are a big chain in jobs. many are not pleased to work with nonexperienced ,or hate facing workers with great skills becoming a danger for their career. Authority and managerial behaviour is a real art.ciao from italy.
That's one of the reasons being self aware is super important. Once you accept this truth, you start asking people more questions about their experiences and listening, watching, observing.
Following your gut is usually the key. Our intuition can be "off" especially if it's programmed to look at only the negatives and not the positives (and vice-versa), but it's also best to be safe than sorry. Especially if it's a higher stakes situation.
I believe we all possess good gut feelings & good intuition agree both quite similar must listen to them especially when can't stop thinking samething that keeps popping into your head all the time. Sometimes question all as trust huge.
Well some people project more than others.. Knowing one’s own tendency to project, or not, will help you be more accurate. Also assessing how much another person is projecting is useful too.. usually the more immature, ambitious, any strong emotional state or fragility will increase projections..
I say this all the time I swear we don't know anyone no matter how long you think we know them. I now understand it's all about projecting your own images / trauma. Nobody can see us for who we truly are not even ourselves. It's really all in our mind 😢 profoundly simple
Thank you! 🤗 You can't change anything in your life if you start with a wrong attitude, but if you change your attitude and the way you look at things, everything changes automatically! 🎉 STOP projecting, msg for good people out there!!
@@livelearn06livelearn86and those me me me are immature ones, because they can't learn and evolve spiritually if they only care about themselves all the time
When I was younger, I was often seen as Miss Goody Two Shoes. For quite a while, I tried to make myself more likable by drinking or simply agreeing with others. I have a tendency to see the positive in people even when their actions don't reflect it, and I tend to place people on a pedestal. Unfortunately, many of the men I was involved with ended up leaving because they didn't want to live up to this ideal. They grew weary of trying to be the good person I saw in them and eventually gave up.
Honestly people don't want to be or do better at least most 🤷 I somewhat relate as I'm someone who had to learn the hard way everyone doesn't think like I do even when that is something good kind and positive 😅😢
@Clevelandsteamer324 I generally agree but I'd like to specify it by saying it should be normal to expect of people to be kind trustworthy and faithful even though that's not the case most of the time I think we were brought up to believe society want and can do better once again we've been deceived from the get go thank you parents you failed me 😢
You are right Robert Greene. What we take to be true is based upon our perception. Our perception is based on what we believe. What we believe is our reality.
He’s saying, projections are Not reality and if you don’t become aware of your projections, you aren’t living in reality; you’re living in made up beliefs in your mind. He’s Not saying that whatever you believe is actual reality.
You have Andrew Tate… Joe Rogan… Tony Robbins….. then This guy. Idc what people think but this guy has a unique perspective that we can learn so much from. Each person we hear today, brings their own interpretation of wisdom… yet it’s wise. If we can take nuggets from this and that one… and actually apply them, we would be a powerhouse of a person
in healthy personal relationships, you have each other's backs and you each compensate for what the other is lacking. might not be 100% success, but you make it better, rather than nitpick and make it worse
You’re right. Some people think that just because they know about my past, that that automatically gives them some sort of clever insight into who I am - it doesn’t! I’m much more than a stupid background check - believe me.
Prospective and reality. No two people grieve the same at a funeral. So realize every person is going through something. Don't take things personally. It is all a test.
I tend to do this with people of a higher social class than me, here in the UK, class is a big divider but I rend to think that people from certain privelidged backgrounds are instantly looking down on me or will reject me
Yes, eventhough we have siblings, relatives and friends ,and associates we don't know all their experiences they had in their lives which contributes to their life,s views .
Open communication is freely given & received in our family. We LIKE KNOWING the REAL each other. Encourage REAL TALK. Its a blessing and can be ROF funny...❤ Generational Curse is exactly WHY we share TOTALLY. We LEARNED from that sh*t !!!!!!!
love past pain if you have pain that’s blocking you from loving someone unconditionally than honor your heart space and take time to heal. Speaking from current experience. It will serve you better in the long run
Robert Greene is amazing author and behavioral expert. His books and speeches all carry a profound wisdom he gained over the many years of working and learning from different work cultures ( Hollywood, USA vs Europe, Italy etc.) He learnt the art of reading people or at least at best trying.
This is the reality of projection of fears and emotional triggers and self protection amygdala etc, and existential isolation which it’s actually impossible to close that gap.
There are millions of people who have done & continue to do the hard work of cultivating emotional/psychological healing, growing, maturity, discernment, awareness & critical & complex thinking skills.
I get this from people all the time. They force me to fight their ghosts. They assume who I am instead of learning who I am. They accuse without asking questions. Why don't people want to learn new experiences?
Robert said I don’t have a clue but I can tell you that is Robert’s personal opinion of himself and projects it. In that sentence, the idea is refuted, even Robert may understand we do not live in darkness, some people are shine brighter, and you can share perspectives accurately if you know your capabilities and limits.
I think i understood this at a young age. I used to continually tell my eldest sister that our parents are not her childrens parents so she has to stop using an emotiinally neglected childhood as an excuse for her behaviour. It didnt work, she still failed to see that so continued down same pattern. Whereas, i made sure not to tarr everyone with same brush. Unfortunatley it made me over giving and that childhood love i had so desired made me show too much love to others so id end up getting used and hurt. So I ended up seeing people as self absorbed and selfish because thats what i was shown by the people i loved and trusted. People let you down. It will happen. Even if youre the sweetest, kindest, someome will always find a reason to shit on you so instead i have realised all of this comes from self worth. If you have self worth, you end up not caring about negative opinions. If you have self worth you learn to create healthy boundaries. As long as you are true to yourself, defend yourself, live a life of dignity then you can say im trying, i tried and im succeeding. Love yourself first cos no one else really will, not truly.
My mother-in-law met me and projected a ton of negative thoughts on to me and made me think I was horrible for my life circumstances. Yet it was all about her and her perceptions. She told me I wasn’t worthy of being in their family because I was from a broken home and my mom was an alcoholic which meant I was going to be one and I didn’t go to college and wasn’t planning on it at the time that I was 18 and immature. Lol. None of her judgments were about my character or who I was an an individual person. It had nothing to do with how much I loved her son or how devoted I was to her son. That didn’t matter one bit. Emotions and feelings are a weakness to her. It took a long time to realize that it wouldn’t have mattered who her son married. She’d never be fully happy with her person. My mother was an alcoholic yes, but she loved people with her whole heart and she showed that love for you.
They are so keep your guard up. Thankfully most of them arent smart enough and too impulsive so what they want is clear. If they want attention/they are gossiper back stabbers/if they want money they are filled with drama galore ready to bring it to your world. People also tell on themselves ive noticed when you first meet them. "people always got rid of me or threw me away! they said i talked too much!" THis is used like they're a victim when theres a huge reason this happened and they are surprised you're giving them a chance. Take that info and save yourself the agony of future misery
Just remember adult bullying is real, best to ignore it the best you can, and focus more on loving yourself. This is coming from decades of learning and growing from abuse. Feel sorry for people, and no matter how bad they try to make you feel .. remember who you are, and what you deserve. We cannot change how people act. We can only change how we react. So just don't. Loss is hard, yet it's more difficult when we allow others to make us lose focus on what really matters, our peace.
Yeah it’s tough. I am weary of new people who come into my life. But stay wise like a serpent, gentle like a dove. It’s a hard battle to fight knowing who is for you, time and actions will prove that though.
Well,look for the red flags,,you are probably dealing with MILIGNANT narcissists. Run for the hills before they get you. Look at Narcdaily videos. Get some insight about these toxic people..
@arizonadreaming4183 two days ago,,my husband said something me that was far from being in my mind,just trying to share the driving,,we were coming from a long journey and still had many more hundreds of miles to drive ,and i knew he was tired,after the fiasco of words,,, I was thinking,,the more your try and do good to people,,you end up feeling like the fool...and wondering what just happened?
You are soooooo very right about this ! And unfortunately there is no way it could be different ! But this awareness is already a huge step in helping to live with yourself !.
How Very True Is That I Ask You? Robert Greene You've Really Have Hit 🎯💯💯💯 The Bullseye This Time!!! What A Wise Man You Are For Saying That! Shalom And Amen!✝️✝️🛐🛐😇🌟🤗🙏🙏🙏🇨🇦🇮🇱♾️🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🗽🦅❤❤❤‼️
I was raised by narcissistic psychopaths. You learn how to gauge them from quite a young age, as it is a matter of survival…..you develop instincts for protecting yourself. So when I am near such people, don’t tell me I don’t ‘know them’! Not everyone develops that skill, and his talk may be for them? Example; Back in 1966, my sister dated Robert Benjamin Smith. He wasn’t a ‘mass murderer’…..yet. I usually would tease her boyfriends when they would come calling…..but this dude was different. I peeked around the front door as he was coming into the house, to size up my quarry…..I got such a chill when our eyes locked! Apparently, he was ‘sizing up his quarry’! I ran to my bedroom and locked the door…..I was shaking…..I didn’t understand what just happened. I just felt really scared…..like the devil just entered our home…..but he looked ‘normal’ enough. A short time later, they called my sister to be a character witness in court…..he had shot and killed several women and some children, at Rose-Mar Beauty Salon in Mesa, Arizona. To read his story, he was looking for who he would kill, as he wanted to be remembered for killing the largest amount of people at one time. It was said that he apparently went to the salon too early, as there was usually around 40 people there on a good day. My ‘spidey senses’, from growing up around the narcissistic psychopaths that I did, were obviously maxing out when I looked in his eyes. On a deeper level, I KNEW something was definitely ‘off’ about him…..so I reacted on that. So, this guy in this video can keep his advice for himself where I am concerned…..I’ll listen to my own ‘gut’ about people, before I shut down my instincts to suit this dude! I say, ALWAYS trust your gut! It could cost you your life if you ignore it.
Bad friends ruin lives. Anyone that introduces to bad habits is not a good friend. Surround yourself with happy healthy positive minded people who are grateful for smallest things. They don’t have victim mentality nor are angry all the time. Stop negative thinking. Look at obstacles in your life opportunities to learn and grow.
Let us just assume that he is only 75% correct. If you think that you know the most important people in your life, you are most likely less than 5% correct. My own family decided when I was very young that I was the black sheep of our family because after years of being ignored and physically abused, I began to act out, but I never harmed anyone other than myself in hopes that they would see the damage they were doing. Now, as a father, I remind myself to take a step back and realize that I may not fully understand my own children, and I earnestly try to explore their behaviours before my children feel as desperate as I felt.
You're correct! I knew a woman for 3 years. She was 63 yrs. She rented a house on my property. I fed her, I helped her. She was so nice to my face. One day, she shot her head off in my rent house. She left me messages on every wall, even in the closets, blaming me for her suicide. The county came and got her torso and left the rest for me to clean up. It was definitely the worst thing I have ever had happen to me. The messages were awful. It happened 2 years ago, and I can't get it out of my head. It is in my head every day. I tell my kids dont trust people you don't know them.
To be far, most people don’t even really know themselves.
i do boo
Exactly
Most folks are sadly merely surface lvl & our society actually promotes surface lvl perspective thinking BS. Instead of true critical thinking & diving deep beyond the mere surface lvl. Hell telling folks to actually look at themselves in the mirror might as well be some sorta new hate speech from the way folks be defensively reacting
Bingooooo ❤
@@TYRONE-kh9zn100%
“Be quick to listen, and slow to speak…”
The good book
I'm usually that way in person with other people
I also have quick empathetic connections with other people, and that's why I now know and understand why I'm kept away from others unlike me.
I'm the love your neighbor type
@@anaibarangan4908 You're basically just talking and talking about yourself when no one asked. You probably need to listen more and make it less about you
I'm the conquer and deceive you type.
"The fact is that a man who wants to act virtuously in every way necessarily comes to grief among so many who are not virtuous."
-Machiavelli
We don't see people as they are we see them as we are. Seeing requires more than eyes.
Painful to admit but yes if you've been betrayed by your own family you can never trust people and you keep yourself guarded in the slightest sign of betrayal or even before it. Of course that doesn't mean people don't turn on you any chance they got. Sometimes just because it's fun no other reason at all. These really go hand in hand 😢
Appreciate the colours of the soul & maybe listen others without judging, then you could know them. But it looks quite mastery 🔅
I’m reminded of the chicken & egg problem. It seems we can only learn about the world through others before we attempt to have others see it through ours. Seeing does require more than eyes but I don’t think we see them as we are exactly. It’s the concert of both that ultimately unify what we see or others see. In the end, we see. But even then we don’t.
Or, we see them as we want them to be ...
It requires seeing the truth and not what we’d like to see. Only then will you see people’s true colors
Listen, really listen, ask questions, watch patterns❤
Yes, but how many people have the disposition or the time for that...but I totally agree with you ❤
I'm meeting my sisters new boyfriend soon I will definitely be analyzing everything @@rodicapepescu4599
@@rodicapepescu4599 said like a truly impatient person who loves to excuse their behavior
@@elisemiller13 eliseee dear you are in hurry to make judgements I see, you should know I wasn't talking about myself, I listen actually and pay close attention because I'm not a kid anymore. But you still have a lot to learn it seems
Soon, there is going to be the rapture. It's when there will be trumpet sounds, and after the trumpet sounds, God will lift his people from here. Also, God said people should be living by the Bible. Amen, and God bless you.
1.
❤* John 3:16 - "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have eternal life". ❤
“Always assume the person you’re doing business with is trying to rip you off because most likely they are and if they aren’t, you can be pleasantly surprised.” -Steve Martin as Julian Dell
How do u operate like this without putting people in negative boxes and thinking the worst of others constantly? It doesn't seem like a good way to live, seems rather soul sucking, tho it doesn't serve to be gullible either but ijdk how can one achieve the balance in being wary without being paranoid and pessimistic
@@getgot3461 that’s a great concern. And that all comes down to protecting your downside. I get paid before services are delivered and not after. The second I spot a red flag with a woman, I’m gone. And if I get the feeling a friend, is not looking after my best interest, I cut them off. This is probably why I love my life and the people I surround myself with, and I’m not complaining about this disloyalty, cheating, jealous friends, etc. Your time, attention and affection is the most important thing in the entire world. I don’t want you to waste it.
@@getgot3461The solution is simply to unsugar coatedly understand actual reality & the nature of man or us humans. Which literally says or strongly indicates that the average person in general is a selfish lil piece of crap that is out for themselves or themselves & small circle who also sadly on average can't be trusted like that. Or the basic fact that we live in a world where man has adopted ideologies such as it's a dog eat dog world bc it actually is & why is it so? Bc man has willingly adopted it for himself. Long story short unsugar coatedly facing & understanding the true nature of things in general usually clears up the confusion as well as allows one to see & move objectively accordingly. Instead of holding on to & moving off of ones own subjective right or wrong personal opinions & feelings
@@getgot3461it is hard but with practice you can train yourself to just keep reflecting until you hit that point of neutrality with yourself like , " does how I perceive this situation actually matter, and if so what will solve my situation, be as direct to yourself and others as possible once you realise what you need, always show consideration of others and their time and you will earn the necessary respect to help solve your problems and have the trust in you that you can solve theirs too
That's a pretty bad example. You have to trust people in order to live a fulfilling life. However, if they don't have integrity, you are not responsible for that.
The trauma part is so correct . It can make someone act different than they are . I’m finding that out quick.
Wise advice for narcissists who need to break free. The empath needs to be very careful when relating to others pain. The challenge is compartmentalization in the pain of others.
You are so correct. I didn't know any of my family and none of them knew me.
Got evil bastards in my 'family'
Yep. I too have a few evil siblings.@yeldarleumas1847
Its a very wise statement....projecting our own images.
Anyone knows the title of the full video?
Every one has their own perception about you. Nobody knows the real you except God. Even you have a perception of you which might be incorrect.
@@waleedimtiaz9994precisely, which is why an aspect of our nature includes curiosity; other wise, why would we value knowledge, or our ability to apply knowledge in practicality. Why do we like building and categorizing and collecting? Memories, relationships, financial pursuits, personal goals; we are simply searching for, defining, and finding out who we are ourselves; as such, how could we possibly expect to duly and completely know someone else? When our knowledge, perspectives, physical form, and mental capabilities are all known to be limited, how could we possibly assert to know anyone or anything as truly?
Cognitive distortion
There is no reality without projecting your own understanding onto it
The more you think you know you find that you really don't know! "Man know thyself " most important!
Saying "I don't know" is more powerful than we think
I chose to see the good on people, don't let anyone use divisions and fears to lock you in yourself. Life is beautiful experience it with all has to offer.
I agree
Think about it. The ONLY person you can rely on is YOURSELF. Period.
I think the message here is more about how much (or little) you engage in getting to actually know you're closest, and yourself in a way.. not that much about how many you can rely on.. maybe we all felt more trust if we actually knew the people closest to us better❤❤❤ Important message i think ❤❤❤️
Wasn't the point...
Self knowledge and self maturity......yes😮
Sadly..this is not the idea of this video clip !...
My uncle said you will never know everything about your wife. Get over it. Some things she will take to her grave and vice versa. 😊
Robert, you are so right. 35 years & I actually believe I know him less now, than I did in the beginning 😮
I try my best to never make assumptions of other people but rather get to know them and understand their way to see things. I always been like this cause we all have problems and we all want to bee seen, heard, felt so I always do my best to offer that to others
I don't know how about other people,but when i see a person,my first impression turns to be correct later on. Their behavioural patern show i was right most of the time
Cos you manifested it to be that way - your thoughts create reality! Test it out for your self and see
@@richrich2862 no I did not. They prove it by themselves.
Totally. Because gut instinct is always right
He's a superb author. A modern intellectual
Seek and be understanding, because understanding is always better than assuming, and knowing is better than believing. But completely understanding another human being is essentially impossible.
This is a terrifying but also relieving piece of wisdom. Thank you Robert i have never been so self aware before since i started watching you're videos i have been able to navigate relationships with family and people in general im grateful to be able to learn more and more from you also the way you deliver in a captivating way. Much appreciated and best wishes.
Appreciate your positive reply. This negativity was off putting for me, but I still retain the message.
I identify with you. Be brave 💕🙏🏻🫶🏻
Yes. Terrifying is a good word.
✨👍🏼✨
I was listening this 40 times and finally wrote the essential message down and understood. Thanks 🙏
It is so refreshing to actually see and hear a good psychologist. There are so many quacks out there, i have been very unlucky with counselers.
So true. Transference and Projection, and Displace anger.
Very true, we think we know people, but we never know them
Sometimes even a lifetime is not enough to know someone and sometimes (rarely) all it takes a moment to know someone.
I like this guy. Very wise.
Ironically, this advice from Robert in less than a minute, is more valuable and PRACTICAL than all the psychologists talking online 👏
There are some parallels. Projecting parts of yourself you don't like onto others is what Carl Jung called the shadow self.
What value did you gain from it exactly? Was it ("dont piss off people in positions of authority")?
@@velvetbeesdo you even know what you are talking about?
That’s why communication is key ! Deep Listening and Honesty! I always have to tell my boyfriend “I don’t need you to give me advice or try to fix this”. Just listen to me . If I want advice or help I’ll ask after and be very clear about what I want. No person can be exactly “in your shoes”. We do t know what someone is feeling and yes we all project images onto other people. GREAT VIDEO!
That's now how it works, people don't give you advice don't give a poo about you
So true. Subconsciously driven. It’s driving the vehicle not our conscious mind.
See people and things as they are and understand them, remove the bias you have or filters you have acquired over time 🙏🏼
He's correct ...so what he should be saying is get your mind sorted before letting someone
Correct. This means … before letting someone sort our minds for us.
@@Lily_faith227 yes😊😊
We do know them based on their actions… if they’re hurt u in obvious ways, neglect, ridicule, overly critical , we know them
People are like light switches... they can turn on you in a heartbeat... we all have it in us.
Got these people in my so called 'family'
Damn I felt that statement in my soul
Yes. And this video speaks to why...conversation could be so much more than small talk. If we really are interested in who the other person is, and seek to know more than or own projections.
No amount of conversation matters!!!!!! And no matter how well you listen to others. And ask good questions. And you have great self knowledge. Work with them. Live with them for years. NO ONE REALLY KNOWS ANYONE ELSE!!!! Brother or sister. Parents. Kids. Sponse. You don’t know them! And they don’t know you!!
😅
@@richardfadle5921 I don't know about that
people with authority are a big chain in jobs. many are not pleased to work with nonexperienced ,or hate facing workers with great skills becoming a danger for their career. Authority and managerial behaviour is a real art.ciao from italy.
We see things from our own perspective - but we can expand that, by stop judging people and listen more to each other ☺️
That's one of the reasons being self aware is super important. Once you accept this truth, you start asking people more questions about their experiences and listening, watching, observing.
Especially if they do not know themselves. That is even more terrifying
Following your gut is usually the key. Our intuition can be "off" especially if it's programmed to look at only the negatives and not the positives (and vice-versa), but it's also best to be safe than sorry. Especially if it's a higher stakes situation.
What's the difference between gut intensity & intuition?
@@ccbluesky9780gut is felt, intuition is thought
@@ccbluesky9780 To me they both sound the same.
I believe we all possess good gut feelings & good intuition agree both quite similar must listen to them especially when can't stop thinking samething that keeps popping into your head all the time. Sometimes question all as trust huge.
You are spot on!
Well some people project more than others..
Knowing one’s own tendency to project, or not, will help you be more accurate.
Also assessing how much another person is projecting is useful too.. usually the more immature, ambitious, any strong emotional state or fragility will increase projections..
I say this all the time I swear we don't know anyone no matter how long you think we know them.
I now understand it's all about projecting your own images / trauma. Nobody can see us for who we truly are not even ourselves.
It's really all in our mind 😢 profoundly simple
its all part of the computer game called life
My last relationship made me realize this is true! He was always projecting. It was extremely confusing. He was living in his past. It was very sad.
@victoriagargano8332 What's your current status.....?
Keep the faith. You will prevail. 🙏🏻💕
Shitmhappens
Maybe..... but you do it as well. There aren't exceptions
Thank you! 🤗 You can't change anything in your life if you start with a wrong attitude, but if you change your attitude and the way you look at things, everything changes automatically! 🎉
STOP projecting, msg for good people out there!!
Doesn't work in some families. Everybody has ego problems. Me me me. Tried for a long time.
@@livelearn06livelearn86and those me me me are immature ones, because they can't learn and evolve spiritually if they only care about themselves all the time
TRUTH✨✨✨
I removed myself from a lot of people & places after realizing this TRUTH✨✨✨
Probably realized,true Narcissist behavior
You can think you know someone your whole life long and then realize at the very end, that you never knew them at all, or they you.
What a great spirit Greene has.
What a great spirit you've always had.
do you really know him though? 😄
Mr Greene is so Right!😊
Has Robert Greene ever had a discussion with Jordan Peterson?? I’d love to watch it. If so, someone please tell me where to find it.
This has to be the most accurate piece of information to be spoken by someone that I totally agree that makes so much sense....
You feel who they are...If it feels trash it is trash
Gut feeling..yes
When I was younger, I was often seen as Miss Goody Two Shoes. For quite a while, I tried to make myself more likable by drinking or simply agreeing with others. I have a tendency to see the positive in people even when their actions don't reflect it, and I tend to place people on a pedestal. Unfortunately, many of the men I was involved with ended up leaving because they didn't want to live up to this ideal. They grew weary of trying to be the good person I saw in them and eventually gave up.
You are pedastalizing people. No one can live up to that pressure. Check your co-dependency. Lots of material for free
It’s great that you’ve now become self aware. That’s the step towards working on it. Goodluck on your journey
Honestly people don't want to be or do better at least most 🤷 I somewhat relate as I'm someone who had to learn the hard way everyone doesn't think like I do even when that is something good kind and positive 😅😢
@Clevelandsteamer324 I generally agree but I'd like to specify it by saying it should be normal to expect of people to be kind trustworthy and faithful even though that's not the case most of the time I think we were brought up to believe society want and can do better once again we've been deceived from the get go thank you parents you failed me 😢
@@annaisis7510sad face emoji, pity party crap. Sickening
I'm 62, and I honestly had that same thought or opinion for the last 20 years so so.
It’s based on philosophical precepts that people have written about for 1000’s of years.
You are right Robert Greene. What we take to be true is based upon our perception. Our perception is based on what we believe. What we believe is our reality.
......and what we want to believe.
He’s saying, projections are Not reality and if you don’t become aware of your projections, you aren’t living in reality; you’re living in made up beliefs in your mind. He’s Not saying that whatever you believe is actual reality.
If you don't lie, cheat or scam ,you don't expect others to do so, it's always a surprise when you figure someone out..
.
You have Andrew Tate… Joe Rogan… Tony Robbins….. then This guy. Idc what people think but this guy has a unique perspective that we can learn so much from. Each person we hear today, brings their own interpretation of wisdom… yet it’s wise. If we can take nuggets from this and that one… and actually apply them, we would be a powerhouse of a person
All those people you mentioned are not authors of books like Green
@@Clevelandsteamer324 I’m a bit of a writer myself. I can appreciate this man’s perspective for sure
Andrew Tate 😂
I like this man. he just makes sense.
in healthy personal relationships, you have each other's backs and you each compensate for what the other is lacking. might not be 100% success, but you make it better, rather than nitpick and make it worse
You’re right.
Some people think that just because they know about my past, that that automatically gives them some sort of clever insight into who I am - it doesn’t!
I’m much more than a stupid background check - believe me.
What a calming voice coming out of a real calm persom
The ability to understand & accept that even ppl close to us change with age & circumstances the easier it is to know them
Oh I understand what I'm dealing with ..their patterns show me
Prospective and reality. No two people grieve the same at a funeral.
So realize every person is going through something. Don't take things personally. It is all a test.
You can actually know them based on consistent patterns of behaviour
We may understand how to deal in better way, but that doesn't mean we know them fully
@ABQ... just cause someone is an ass too you. We know they an ass. We don't know why but they stll an ASS. Projection orn not
This guy is always full of wisdom
I tend to do this with people of a higher social class than me, here in the UK, class is a big divider but I rend to think that people from certain privelidged backgrounds are instantly looking down on me or will reject me
Yes, eventhough we have siblings, relatives and friends ,and associates we don't know all their experiences they had in their lives which contributes to their life,s views .
Open communication is freely given & received in our family. We LIKE KNOWING the REAL each other. Encourage REAL TALK. Its a blessing and can be ROF funny...❤
Generational Curse is exactly WHY we share TOTALLY. We LEARNED from that sh*t !!!!!!!
This is why I now keep to myself. People are too shady.
Many are Narcissists.
love past pain if you have pain that’s blocking you from loving someone unconditionally than honor your heart space and take time to heal. Speaking from current experience. It will serve you better in the long run
Robert Greene is amazing author and behavioral expert. His books and speeches all carry a profound wisdom he gained over the many years of working and learning from different work cultures ( Hollywood, USA vs Europe, Italy etc.) He learnt the art of reading people or at least at best trying.
This is the reality of projection of fears and emotional triggers and self protection amygdala etc, and existential isolation which it’s actually impossible to close that gap.
There are millions of people who have done & continue to do the hard work of cultivating emotional/psychological healing, growing, maturity, discernment, awareness & critical & complex thinking skills.
I get this from people all the time. They force me to fight their ghosts. They assume who I am instead of learning who I am. They accuse without asking questions. Why don't people want to learn new experiences?
Very true... even your children. You don't know the people you are dealing with...
Robert said I don’t have a clue but I can tell you that is Robert’s personal opinion of himself and projects it.
In that sentence, the idea is refuted, even Robert may understand we do not live in darkness, some people are shine brighter, and you can share perspectives accurately if you know your capabilities and limits.
Initially it sounded like a precaution for not getting hurt, not hurting someone.
I think i understood this at a young age. I used to continually tell my eldest sister that our parents are not her childrens parents so she has to stop using an emotiinally neglected childhood as an excuse for her behaviour. It didnt work, she still failed to see that so continued down same pattern. Whereas, i made sure not to tarr everyone with same brush. Unfortunatley it made me over giving and that childhood love i had so desired made me show too much love to others so id end up getting used and hurt. So I ended up seeing people as self absorbed and selfish because thats what i was shown by the people i loved and trusted. People let you down. It will happen. Even if youre the sweetest, kindest, someome will always find a reason to shit on you so instead i have realised all of this comes from self worth. If you have self worth, you end up not caring about negative opinions. If you have self worth you learn to create healthy boundaries. As long as you are true to yourself, defend yourself, live a life of dignity then you can say im trying, i tried and im succeeding. Love yourself first cos no one else really will, not truly.
My mother-in-law met me and projected a ton of negative thoughts on to me and made me think I was horrible for my life circumstances. Yet it was all about her and her perceptions. She told me I wasn’t worthy of being in their family because I was from a broken home and my mom was an alcoholic which meant I was going to be one and I didn’t go to college and wasn’t planning on it at the time that I was 18 and immature. Lol. None of her judgments were about my character or who I was an an individual person. It had nothing to do with how much I loved her son or how devoted I was to her son.
That didn’t matter one bit. Emotions and feelings are a weakness to her.
It took a long time to realize that it wouldn’t have mattered who her son married. She’d never be fully happy with her person.
My mother was an alcoholic yes, but she loved people with her whole heart and she showed that love for you.
You have a point John Malcovich
We see people they way WE WANT TO SEE THEM- through our perceptions, not as they are
Generational curses
Sometimes cause these issues
You need to do the work and
Good results will prosper
Trust & believe
Best wishes
Yup. This is why i think they are all out to get me
They are so keep your guard up. Thankfully most of them arent smart enough and too impulsive so what they want is clear. If they want attention/they are gossiper back stabbers/if they want money they are filled with drama galore ready to bring it to your world. People also tell on themselves ive noticed when you first meet them. "people always got rid of me or threw me away! they said i talked too much!" THis is used like they're a victim when theres a huge reason this happened and they are surprised you're giving them a chance. Take that info and save yourself the agony of future misery
Just remember adult bullying is real, best to ignore it the best you can, and focus more on loving yourself. This is coming from decades of learning and growing from abuse. Feel sorry for people, and no matter how bad they try to make you feel .. remember who you are, and what you deserve. We cannot change how people act. We can only change how we react. So just don't. Loss is hard, yet it's more difficult when we allow others to make us lose focus on what really matters, our peace.
Yeah it’s tough. I am weary of new people who come into my life. But stay wise like a serpent, gentle like a dove. It’s a hard battle to fight knowing who is for you, time and actions will prove that though.
Well,look for the red flags,,you are probably dealing with MILIGNANT narcissists. Run for the hills before they get you. Look at Narcdaily videos. Get some insight about these toxic people..
@arizonadreaming4183 two days ago,,my husband said something me that was far from being in my mind,just trying to share the driving,,we were coming from a long journey and still had many more hundreds of miles to drive ,and i knew he was tired,after the fiasco of words,,, I was thinking,,the more your try and do good to people,,you end up feeling like the fool...and wondering what just happened?
This is so true. This is why it took for me to start paying attention and realizing what drives other people to act like what they do.
You are soooooo very right about this ! And unfortunately there is no way it could be different ! But this awareness is already a huge step in helping to live with yourself !.
How Very True Is That I Ask You? Robert Greene You've Really Have Hit 🎯💯💯💯 The Bullseye This Time!!! What A Wise Man You Are For Saying That! Shalom And Amen!✝️✝️🛐🛐😇🌟🤗🙏🙏🙏🇨🇦🇮🇱♾️🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲🗽🦅❤❤❤‼️
Faith in things working out is always key
That's why knowing attachment style is important!!!
So true parents be thinking they know their children
The things I’ve done with other girls in the past and their parents will have them in church on a Sunday thinking she’s a virgin.
@@RevealedFilms "The thing you have done with other girls" as a boy or as their bff.
@RevealedFilms wait til you have daughters
I was raised by narcissistic psychopaths. You learn how to gauge them from quite a young age, as it is a matter of survival…..you develop instincts for protecting yourself.
So when I am near such people, don’t tell me I don’t ‘know them’! Not everyone develops that skill, and his talk may be for them?
Example; Back in 1966, my sister dated Robert Benjamin Smith. He wasn’t a ‘mass murderer’…..yet. I usually would tease her boyfriends when they would come calling…..but this dude was different. I peeked around the front door as he was coming into the house, to size up my quarry…..I got such a chill when our eyes locked! Apparently, he was ‘sizing up his quarry’! I ran to my bedroom and locked the door…..I was shaking…..I didn’t understand what just happened. I just felt really scared…..like the devil just entered our home…..but he looked ‘normal’ enough.
A short time later, they called my sister to be a character witness in court…..he had shot and killed several women and some children, at Rose-Mar Beauty Salon in Mesa, Arizona. To read his story, he was looking for who he would kill, as he wanted to be remembered for killing the largest amount of people at one time. It was said that he apparently went to the salon too early, as there was usually around 40 people there on a good day.
My ‘spidey senses’, from growing up around the narcissistic psychopaths that I did, were obviously maxing out when I looked in his eyes.
On a deeper level, I KNEW something was definitely ‘off’ about him…..so I reacted on that.
So, this guy in this video can keep his advice for himself where I am concerned…..I’ll listen to my own ‘gut’ about people, before I shut down my instincts to suit this dude! I say, ALWAYS trust your gut! It could cost you your life if you ignore it.
That's true , we don't know anyone really.
So true you don’t know anyone and you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors.
Nice one Robert, we are blessed with you❤
to understand others, one must first understand themself
Mr Greene! I’m so glad I finally found you! Thank you for coming to my life! :) I’m honoured🧎🏼♀️
Bad friends ruin lives. Anyone that introduces to bad habits is not a good friend. Surround yourself with happy healthy positive minded people who are grateful for smallest things. They don’t have victim mentality nor are angry all the time. Stop negative thinking. Look at obstacles in your life opportunities to learn and grow.
Truth , we truly do not know others even if they share a bit, all you truly know is yoursekf
Exactly I've thought this for years, do you ever know anyone, and then when they die you don't know where they go,am i all wrong here, thanks,
We really don't know. You're right!
Let us just assume that he is only 75% correct. If you think that you know the most important people in your life, you are most likely less than 5% correct. My own family decided when I was very young that I was the black sheep of our family because after years of being ignored and physically abused, I began to act out, but I never harmed anyone other than myself in hopes that they would see the damage they were doing. Now, as a father, I remind myself to take a step back and realize that I may not fully understand my own children, and I earnestly try to explore their behaviours before my children feel as desperate as I felt.
Such brilliant life advice. Thank you
Thats why people whom talk with Heart and are honest (and you have to be the same) are easy to understand and to Believe and "read"..
It's true that is why I study a course in miracles. We see everything through the eyes of the past
God bless you 🙏😊
If people with power and authority do not try to control others and you can be yourself with them, I am okay.
You're correct! I knew a woman for 3 years. She was 63 yrs. She rented a house on my property. I fed her, I helped her. She was so nice to my face. One day, she shot her head off in my rent house. She left me messages on every wall, even in the closets, blaming me for her suicide. The county came and got her torso and left the rest for me to clean up. It was definitely the worst thing I have ever had happen to me. The messages were awful. It happened 2 years ago, and I can't get it out of my head. It is in my head every day. I tell my kids dont trust people you don't know them.
Get therapy,,none of that was about you...thank God you were not the one killed..
This is very true....THANKS 4 SHARING.