Every Country England Has Invaded: Visualized

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  • Опубліковано 16 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 25 тис.

  • @jet_flyer
    @jet_flyer 4 роки тому +2809

    England: "Who are you?"
    -"You Invaded us"
    England "...Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?

    • @cerealman2751
      @cerealman2751 4 роки тому +201

      "in sub-saharan Africa...?"
      England: still not narrow enough....

    • @beerykids6703
      @beerykids6703 4 роки тому +141

      Oh I’m in Europe.
      England: _bruh_

    • @McMurica
      @McMurica 4 роки тому +26

      @Celtic Revival / Adfywiad Celtaidd Ignoring what the other person said, he does mention English invasions of France and the Netherlands, and the invasions by the UK are also inherently invasions by England, as well as by Wales, Scotland, and sometimes Irish countries, just like how invasions by America are technically invasions by Wyoming and every other of the 49 states. So technically he is right.

    • @quidam_surprise
      @quidam_surprise 4 роки тому

      @@alphanox8326
      Not really, that's just a figure of speech. These are definitely not synonyms.

    • @aman123go
      @aman123go 4 роки тому +2

      Omg WTF

  • @db-7531
    @db-7531 3 роки тому +5350

    Colony: "You took everything from me"
    Britian: "I dont even know who you are"

    • @TheDutchRiposte
      @TheDutchRiposte 3 роки тому +152

      It do be like that

    • @gaithealwahab5202
      @gaithealwahab5202 3 роки тому +30

      Oofff

    • @nowwhat4322
      @nowwhat4322 3 роки тому +172

      India in a nutshell

    • @67lionsoflisbon37
      @67lionsoflisbon37 3 роки тому +40

      So as a legacy of your colonialism our decendants will come to dear old blighty and return the favour. You'll complain but You started it!

    • @selenayue3628
      @selenayue3628 3 роки тому +8

      Mcu reference

  • @tadoshka5170
    @tadoshka5170 4 роки тому +18395

    When you realize that the Aliens were speaking English in Infinity Wars, so Britain must have colonized the entire galaxy

    • @kunalanand4469
      @kunalanand4469 4 роки тому +461

      Good one

    • @lawrencian
      @lawrencian 4 роки тому +1417

      Or us British are actually aliens

    • @kube2555
      @kube2555 4 роки тому +496

      Shh, dont tell them

    • @kube2555
      @kube2555 4 роки тому +276

      @@kunalanand4469 judging by ur profile pic ur not british, so u wont know our secrets.. -laughs in british-

    • @thegoldengamer9315
      @thegoldengamer9315 4 роки тому +42

      Oh shit

  • @francescocremante3691
    @francescocremante3691 Рік тому +87

    0:46 Europe
    4:47 Asia
    7:03 Oceania
    7:19 Africa
    8:10 Americas

  • @orbracha25
    @orbracha25 3 роки тому +1987

    "who are you?"
    "you invaded me"
    "do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?"

    • @legionx4046
      @legionx4046 3 роки тому +19

      Lol

    • @dice7584
      @dice7584 3 роки тому +6

      You stole this comment.

    • @GromHatt3r
      @GromHatt3r 3 роки тому +55

      @@dice7584 No. He's referencing a very popular batman beyond meme....

    • @orbracha25
      @orbracha25 3 роки тому +32

      @@dice7584 it is possible that someone else has made this comment before me, it's a very popular meme, all i can say is i never saw anyone in this comment section referencing the meme

    • @Wash3D122
      @Wash3D122 3 роки тому +2

      @@dice7584 Ok who cares

  • @kaizermierkrazy6886
    @kaizermierkrazy6886 4 роки тому +1294

    Not British land: *exists*
    The British: ah, I see an issue here.

    • @Xen_the_legend
      @Xen_the_legend 4 роки тому +71

      "And I took that personally"

    • @16kashman
      @16kashman 4 роки тому +28

      OI OI OI! DO YEAOUH HAVE A LOICENSE TO REJECT MY INVASION?

    • @klchai7884
      @klchai7884 4 роки тому +5

      @@Xen_the_legend Anglo-Saxons' des-truc-tion of the world, human beings, human civilization, etc. is a great tra-ge-dy of human history. Their culture has created their bru-tal , gree-d y , of-fen-sive, In-va-sive behavior like the most vicious cancer cells in human body penetrating everywhere in the world, Britain, ARMerica, Australia, Canada, New Zealand etc. are their l o o t s , they are not the native there originally, their e x t r e m e acts of p l u n-d e-r i n g des-troy-ed the harmony of the world and humans which originally maintained an ecological balance in nature, they I n v a d e d more than half of the world, hundreds of millions of human beings have been k i l l e d by them during their ag-gre-ssive behavior, the cultural relics of countries lo-ot-ed and des-troy-ed are countless, the exhibits in the Great Britain Museum in London illustrate all this, but that is only the tip of the iceberg.
      Sadly, in the 21st century, this e x t r e m e l y u-gly human character is still prevailing and destroying the world and human being which represented and lead by the ARMerica government, it uses its powerful mi-li-ta-ry power, continue to obstruct the progress of the world and human civilization with extreme b r u t a l, s h a m e l e s s , most d I s g u s t I n g and greediest actions. It has become a major obstacle to human progress and peaceful coexistence. The Anglo-Saxons and today’s ARMerica government are useless except for op- pres-sing the world’s human right and civilization. The ARMerica government’s complete inability to deal with the current virus pandemic is an excellent proof that they are a paper tiger. They are so Incompetent, incapable in doing something good to human, they are shameless, good for nothing good except lying, rumors fabrication, demonize, blaming, pushing of responsibility to other nation or organization who is doing better than it , and all kinds of atrocities against humanity have reached the highest peak of humanity, and they are clamoring for freedom, democracy, and human rights, but the real fact is that their behavior which violation of human freedom, democracy, and human rights is the most intrusive in human history, their wanton killing of humans, extreme plundering and destruction of human civilization can no longer be repaired, and these behaviors are still continuing today. Who in the world can end this most inhumane behavior in human history? Stop it from continuing in harming the world and mankind? Yes, the rise of the great eastern civilized ancient nation will change all of this and the process and destiny of mankind, the west export only war, military power, weapon, mass slaughtering, day light killing and assassination, booming of other nation’s embassy, colonization, slave trade, demonizing, fabricating of lies and rumors, creating of fake video, blaming, organizing and leading the illegal violent activities in other country, support the illegal group of people against their nation, spying, looting and destroying of other nations’ historical and culture relics etc. etc…… , in fact, there is no end in writing out the bad things the western country did, and just opposite, the eastern great nation does not do all these things against human survival and improvement, great eastern country’s government exports only technology, construction, pandemic essential materials etc. only, and some more, it is so keen in improving the human living standard as a whole so that it planned and launch a super major project which unprecedented in human history-one belt one road, it is why it is qualified to be the biggest hi-tech entrepreneur and capitalist in the world, it is so easy to differentiate good and bad with just a simple compare..Chai from Malaysia.

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому +6

      @@klchai7884 DONT FUCKING DARE BLAME THE ANGLO-SAXONS FOR THIS. It was the fucking Normans. The Anglo-Saxons are a peaceful, friendly, familial and religious people. The Normans are the establishment, the ones you blame. They massacred Anglo-Saxons. They are the monarchy. They do the conquests, they are the globalist collaborators. The Anglo-Saxons are innocent and they only ever came to America to get away from the fucking oppressive Norman government, as they are inherently an egalitarian, tolerant people who don’t like constant war, and despise oppression.

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому +2

      @Андрей Славиков because they know secretly that they couldn’t do it themselves. They would have tried if they could but they couldn’t. Nobody could beat us, until some of us actively started wanting us to be beaten.

  • @joshuabudiarto5036
    @joshuabudiarto5036 4 роки тому +5083

    Immigration officer literally anywhere: “Occupation?”
    British person: “Yes! Wait no sorry force of habit ”

    • @User31129
      @User31129 4 роки тому +182

      And to think that before this I thought only "Sex?" could be hilariously answered with "Yes!"

    • @Thenorthsace
      @Thenorthsace 4 роки тому +26

      You're all big and smart behind your screens aren't you.

    • @bruhwhat8586
      @bruhwhat8586 4 роки тому +83

      @@Thenorthsace Yes!
      Wait no sorry force of habit

    • @the_unsilenced3138
      @the_unsilenced3138 4 роки тому +93

      @@Thenorthsace I'm guessing you're salty you got invaded?

    • @TurboThunda
      @TurboThunda 4 роки тому +21

      @@the_unsilenced3138 prob just an unhappy person projecting their negativity onto all of us. so many losers on the internet lol

  • @bencochrane6112
    @bencochrane6112 Рік тому +458

    If you've experienced the weather in the UK you'd understand why we wanted to go literally anywhere else.

    • @AmericansMarryCousins
      @AmericansMarryCousins Рік тому +14

      Said by someone who never lived on the south coast

    • @DarrenHoussein
      @DarrenHoussein Рік тому

      @@AmericansMarryCousins South coast is still shit

    • @AmericansMarryCousins
      @AmericansMarryCousins Рік тому +14

      @@DarrenHoussein its comparable to france, its why English sparkling wine consistently outscores french champagnes

    • @chatteyj
      @chatteyj Рік тому +12

      @@AmericansMarryCousins I live near the south coast and the weather is just as sh*t as anywhere in the UK, its slightly milder in winter sometimes but otherwise the weather is often poor.

    • @AmericansMarryCousins
      @AmericansMarryCousins Рік тому +4

      @@chatteyj said by someone who aint ever been up north rofl get a grip mate the difference is huge, the south is same latitude as northern france wheres the north is same latitude as denmark and norway. Let alone Scotland.

  • @The_Soviet_Onion
    @The_Soviet_Onion 4 роки тому +947

    1800s: * exist *
    Random 2 meters squared island in the pacific: *Why do I hear the British anthem?*

    • @m4raw121
      @m4raw121 4 роки тому +25

      Philippine: ah nvm we got spain

    • @ssssSTopmotion
      @ssssSTopmotion 4 роки тому

      He

    • @BH-zj1kh
      @BH-zj1kh 4 роки тому

      P

    • @The_Soviet_Onion
      @The_Soviet_Onion 4 роки тому +1

      @@arolemaprarath6615 but spain was never a British colony
      And neither was the philipines

    • @Reynning
      @Reynning 3 роки тому +3

      @@The_Soviet_Onion The Philippines is British colony, since 1762 to 1764.
      The occupation was an extension of the larger Seven Years' War between Britain and France, which Spain had recently entered on the side of the French. The British wanted to use Manila as an entrepôt for trade in the region, particularly with China.
      The Spanish agreed to deliver a ransom to the British in exchange for the city being spared from any further sacking.
      Aftermath. The British occupation of Manila lasted until Manila was returned to Spain according to the 1763 Treaty of Paris. News that it had been lost did not reach Spain until after the cessation of hostilities between the two powers.

  • @alex29443
    @alex29443 3 роки тому +3127

    I imagine that for Americans this is like finding out that your estranged father used to be in a biker gang before he settled down to become an insurance salesman.

    • @livingispain-e4i
      @livingispain-e4i 3 роки тому +185

      This made me think of a biker girl who thinks her dad is an uncool old man but then sees his old pictures fuck

    • @england1413
      @england1413 3 роки тому +100

      Insurance salesman = spot on

    • @PNW_Marxist
      @PNW_Marxist 3 роки тому +68

      Not really, considering we seem to be carrying the torch for imperialism in the modern era.

    • @alex29443
      @alex29443 3 роки тому +36

      @@PNW_Marxist Ah, the USA isn't so bad, other than the occasional oil war (which OPEC did provoke a little), the USA has been pretty free-wheeling and laissez faire.

    • @Vitorruy1
      @Vitorruy1 3 роки тому +59

      You'd be surprised at how many countries the US invaded, it wasnt just iraq

  • @patrickcharzin3062
    @patrickcharzin3062 4 роки тому +4587

    "Look out guys, Germany is going to invade everyone and take over the world!"
    -Britain, 1939

    • @lightr2187
      @lightr2187 4 роки тому +32

      @Eureka like everyone else during that time

    • @simonmartinez91
      @simonmartinez91 4 роки тому +13

      @@lightr2187 not everyone.

    • @stung39
      @stung39 4 роки тому +180

      The British and French always hated Germany

    • @blanne9628
      @blanne9628 4 роки тому +113

      you forgot the bit about genocide

    • @gamebawesome
      @gamebawesome 4 роки тому +188

      “OUR WORLD”
      -Britain, 1939

  • @BritishLad87
    @BritishLad87 3 роки тому +991

    Britain: It was just business, nothing personal.

    • @wlockhart
      @wlockhart 3 роки тому +9

      Sanchez, Licence to Kill.

    • @BritishLad87
      @BritishLad87 3 роки тому +22

      @NeEYaH Yes... What do you want peaple to do... Lie about it? It's what we as a species have done throughout human's Civilizations, right across the planet, how do you think the man kind has spread throughout the entire world? giving Roses and daffodils out? wise up and get with reality.

    • @odin5188
      @odin5188 3 роки тому

      @@BritishLad87 I wouldn't be advise to it if now they're saying too many foreigner here. Ala Brexit. Go figure

    • @BritishLad87
      @BritishLad87 3 роки тому

      @@odin5188 It's inevitable... who said people couldn't come here lol

    • @odin5188
      @odin5188 3 роки тому

      @@BritishLad87 Mate, not sure if serious answer.
      That was the whole idea behind Brexit, dressed up as sovereignty.

  • @szoszaty
    @szoszaty 4 роки тому +13037

    "Every country England HAS NOT invaded" would be easier.

    • @coatofarms4439
      @coatofarms4439 4 роки тому +1183

      It’s literally just Kazakhstan, Sweden, Czechoslovakia, Mongolia, and surprisingly Poland.

    • @TheTibetyak
      @TheTibetyak 4 роки тому +564

      @@coatofarms4439 For some reason, they failed to list Tibet. The British invaded Tibet in 1904. Bayonets to Lhasa by Peter Fleming (1961)

    • @coatofarms4439
      @coatofarms4439 4 роки тому +295

      @@TheTibetyak Britain and China do have things in common then.

    • @cococly
      @cococly 4 роки тому +72

      Korea too

    • @Manananggal-oe8gs
      @Manananggal-oe8gs 4 роки тому +51

      @@coatofarms4439 Philippines because it's a US colony before.

  • @alccap
    @alccap 3 роки тому +4399

    Alternative Title: The Nations of The World

  • @ForburyLion
    @ForburyLion Рік тому +346

    It's worth noting that the British were not the only ones invading or colonising foreign territories, they were just better at it. The Spanish even attempted to invade Britain but the British sank the Spanish Armada... to be fair though, The British later attempted to invade Spain with an armada of their own, which was also a failure, but they don't teach that part of history in British classrooms. In fact I only learnt about that part of history today thanks to google.

    • @JOHNNYBOI999
      @JOHNNYBOI999 Рік тому +6

      Yes true there's so many people hating on them

    • @iliketurtles5180
      @iliketurtles5180 Рік тому +12

      They did it at a far larger scale though so they do still deserve blame. It still effects millions of people today as well, just look at Bangladesh and India and the Middle East.

    • @JakeKoenig
      @JakeKoenig Рік тому

      Yeah but Brits are white, which is why everyone always whines about "colonization, (including the dipshit who runs this channel) and doesn't talk about anyone else on Earth doing the same thing. Islam has spent the past 1400 years invading non-Muslim lands, but you won't see that on this channel.

    • @Jluna16
      @Jluna16 Рік тому +6

      Nah, they just had more greed then anyone else

    • @lizardtenticlez4000
      @lizardtenticlez4000 Рік тому +1

      Lol “better at it” the British just aimlessly spread chaos around the world and couldn’t maintain control of anywhere. Just another war obsessed culture.

  • @KombiLife
    @KombiLife 4 роки тому +12784

    This explains why my British passport keeps getting rejected at the border. 😂

    • @DonnieX6
      @DonnieX6 4 роки тому +242

      Good to see you two here, safe travels!

    • @sryld
      @sryld 4 роки тому +89

      yes same

    • @ssssSTopmotion
      @ssssSTopmotion 4 роки тому +99

      Good joke ,dad

    • @kacitalasekrichard4985
      @kacitalasekrichard4985 4 роки тому +72

      @@ssssSTopmotion WTF

    • @ImmAdam
      @ImmAdam 4 роки тому +6

      Fancy finding you two here lol, safe travels

  • @anthonywhelan5419
    @anthonywhelan5419 3 роки тому +5254

    My old Irish father, rip, used to say, "The sun never set on the British Empire because Christ couldn't trust them in the dark."

    • @brozolotamang6269
      @brozolotamang6269 3 роки тому +162

      Wow

    • @JSGRanks
      @JSGRanks 3 роки тому +61

      wow 😒

    • @Trackrace29582
      @Trackrace29582 3 роки тому +221

      That’s pretty poetic

    • @trollinape2697
      @trollinape2697 3 роки тому +169

      I send my condolences, but I think this was a copy of a well known quote

    • @christianf99
      @christianf99 3 роки тому +214

      @@trollinape2697 maybe that’s where his father got the quote 🤷🏾‍♂️

  • @ssmmmfeaa8657
    @ssmmmfeaa8657 4 роки тому +1360

    Land: exists
    The British: That is now mine, and mine only.

    • @Triplen01
      @Triplen01 4 роки тому +9

      @Cowboy Cookie that was a civil war if anything. Would be an L if it were the natives who had fought and won instead of British settlers who rebelled.

    • @A1057-m5w
      @A1057-m5w 4 роки тому +2

      Hippity Hoppoty, your home is our property...

    • @akshit318
      @akshit318 4 роки тому +1

      How nice of you to think that Britain only likes to show ownership over land... When most of their major disputes were over trading sea routes....

    • @MsGazpugh
      @MsGazpugh 4 роки тому +1

      Hippity hoppity the world is my property

    • @arcticowl2401
      @arcticowl2401 4 роки тому

      Think of your own meme you losers!

  • @Yora21
    @Yora21 4 роки тому +667

    "Serbian Serbs"
    The fact that this term is not redundant tells a lot of how messed up the Yugoslav Wars were.

    • @neonlight1214
      @neonlight1214 4 роки тому +5

      Pretty sure he didn't intend to say that. If he would use that in any other country, like Britain invaded French cities, he would have also said "Spanish Spaniard targets bombarded" or something. "Serbian serb" is something that doesn't exist and is a grammatical error.

    • @vujkee
      @vujkee 4 роки тому +3

      Yup, they were

    • @antoniofrancis1736
      @antoniofrancis1736 4 роки тому +25

      @@neonlight1214 he actually probably said that because he also mentioned bosnian serbs

    • @emperor_ra
      @emperor_ra 4 роки тому +3

      @@neonlight1214 problem is in the Yugoslav you actually had serbs in Serbia and serbs in bosnia for example and other places

    • @neonlight1214
      @neonlight1214 4 роки тому +1

      @@antoniofrancis1736 bosnian Serbs don't exist. It's only a nationalistic, fashistic term used only by those who have hate among others. It is downgrading someone. It is like someone is born in Germany ---> he is a German but his parents are from Turkey and you call him a "German turk". Doesn't make sense, how is he a turk when he barely goes there, and has tradition he learned while being in Germany, his mother language is German. Noone uses this term. Only idiots use this and that's why the war happened there in west Balkan and not somewhere in Europe...

  • @deathsquad8891
    @deathsquad8891 3 роки тому +1452

    Switzerland, Sweden and most of Eastern Europe: If I stand perfectly still he won't notice

    • @goatmansasquatch1485
      @goatmansasquatch1485 3 роки тому +75

      Eastern Europe was nothing to fuck with back then

    • @hihowareyou8287
      @hihowareyou8287 3 роки тому +20

      Switzerland strong

    • @XGD5layer
      @XGD5layer 3 роки тому +29

      England and Sweden fought first on different, then on the same side in the 30 years war

    • @oldzkr
      @oldzkr 3 роки тому +14

      @@hihowareyou8287 yep you cannot invade Switzerland even with nukes

    • @j3dR576
      @j3dR576 3 роки тому +26

      There were strong Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth over centuries 💪 + we have always had nice/neutral relations with England/UK

  • @christofu3111
    @christofu3111 3 роки тому +5856

    It’s amazing how just a small country on an island took over so much of earth

    • @L_Bo549
      @L_Bo549 3 роки тому +745

      Because we invaded one country, trained troops from that country, continued to do that, got bigger armies, invaded bigger countries, etc.

    • @christofu3111
      @christofu3111 3 роки тому +478

      @@L_Bo549 I know but still, Britain managed to invade countries with a higher population than them as well

    • @khorasan2152
      @khorasan2152 3 роки тому +375

      @@L_Bo549 because british are in a small Island and the sea surrounds them, british at that time had the fastest boat and can move anywhere easily hence conquering half the world

    • @alecfongy3175
      @alecfongy3175 3 роки тому +159

      I think they also had a massive navy of warships that improved over time

    • @christofu3111
      @christofu3111 3 роки тому +184

      @@alecfongy3175 yeah they had the best navy out of any empire

  • @bettybunbun9664
    @bettybunbun9664 Рік тому +51

    That wasn't even an exhaustive list- you could have added much of Antarctica, Falklands, Malta, etc. And Wales and Scotland seeing as you said England and not Britain.

    • @Kakarot64.
      @Kakarot64. Рік тому +3

      Right lads got some penguins to colonise let's go civilise them barbarians and introduce them to the wonders of tea and penguin bars.

    • @The-Cat
      @The-Cat Рік тому +2

      @@Kakarot64. tea wasn't a British drink it was Chinese that the Brits fell in love with.

    • @damienreilly4347
      @damienreilly4347 Рік тому +6

      People like to think Britain is just England, especially the Welsh and Scottish, because that way they can look like victims instead of the aggressors that they also were.

  • @kob6912
    @kob6912 4 роки тому +1815

    “The English continue to invade Spain by the millions every winter”
    TRUE LMAO

    • @cargumdeu
      @cargumdeu 4 роки тому +23

      not this winter chum

    • @SCARPENTER290
      @SCARPENTER290 4 роки тому +24

      Could you imagine the standard of living and the economy if they didn't.

    • @garyt123
      @garyt123 4 роки тому +37

      Coastal Spain isn't doing too good this year without the Brits and the Germans :(

    • @VenomousCompany
      @VenomousCompany 4 роки тому +31

      @@SCARPENTER290 Isn't like 20% of the Spanish GDP coming from the British alone? xD

    • @kingofthejungle3833
      @kingofthejungle3833 4 роки тому +9

      and England today only exists because a French duke invaded and killed the Viking king, and his 2 brothers. At little place called Hastings

  • @heriaramburo5561
    @heriaramburo5561 3 роки тому +1579

    I love the British argumentation for conquering places: "because it's french territory" or "because it's from a nation that is allied with France".

    • @dredd1502
      @dredd1502 3 роки тому +215

      Still a reasonable argument! Ha ha.

    • @tonyb9735
      @tonyb9735 3 роки тому +150

      In fairness we were at war with the French at the time. Which is to say, most of the time.

    • @jamesblackwell2067
      @jamesblackwell2067 3 роки тому +82

      they did it to us, too, its just that we were better at it than they were ^^

    • @thoraero
      @thoraero 3 роки тому +30

      Very justified. Very justified :D

    • @andrewgarner2224
      @andrewgarner2224 3 роки тому +46

      France the only thing the British are allowed to hate/mock/despise without being labelled 'phobic
      Doubly so for Macron ;)

  • @tiredgardener
    @tiredgardener 4 роки тому +624

    British History is so fascinating, a thousand years of being invaded/colonised/raided (Roman, Danes, Irish, Norwegians, Jutes, Angles, Saxons, Normans, etc), then a thousand years of doing the same to just about everybody.
    Not trying to justify or pardon it, just that one small piece of rain soaked land has played a massive role in shaping the modern world.

    • @CountScarlioni
      @CountScarlioni 4 роки тому +80

      We can blame the Normans for kicking off a lot of the conquering. Until 1066 England was an insular, almost isolationist country with a Scandinavian culture and almost no relationship with the powers of continental Europe.
      Post Norman conquest and now there's a hyper-aggressive French speaking aristocracy in charge. They bleed England of all its wealth and manpower in order to fight endless, protracted wars against their (many) enemies in Europe. Even William the Conqueror spent more of his years fighting his rivals in France than he ever spent fighting England. It sets up a pattern of militarism that never ends.

    • @jasperlawrence5361
      @jasperlawrence5361 4 роки тому +56

      It is interesting, and being an island the last real invasion (though not technically the last) was the Normans in 1066. As a consequence, very few wars fought on English territory, as a consequence of that it was the wealthiest country in Europe for centuries and it wasn't even close. In fact, that was why the Normans invaded. On top of that, it was very safe and peaceful. England's murder rate in the 12th century or thereabouts on was better than Italy's in the early twentieth century. And they emasculated their Monarchy and church really early, that is why they got the industrial revolution. At one point I have read that about 75% by value of Global Trade went through the Port of London. 3/4 of the entire world's trade through one port.

    • @montyboon4127
      @montyboon4127 4 роки тому +51

      I take offense to the term "rain soaked" just because i have to take a canoe for the first 2 miles to work, doesn't mean it rains a lot. And just because all my furniture is in stilts doesnt mean its rain soaked

    • @okenough2124
      @okenough2124 4 роки тому +8

      @@montyboon4127 As a bri ish person myself, I think ha 's really funny

    • @floflo1645
      @floflo1645 4 роки тому +6

      @@jasperlawrence5361 it was the wealthiest country in Europe for only two centuries. Spain was wealthier for much longer.

  • @nandarafi9788
    @nandarafi9788 Рік тому +49

    "So which country do you want?"
    England: "Yes."

  • @somedude8468
    @somedude8468 3 роки тому +2419

    The world:
    *exist*
    Brtitish:
    "Is for me?"
    👉👈

  • @GabrielTravelerVideos
    @GabrielTravelerVideos 4 роки тому +2184

    Irak, Wassington and Nicarague?

  • @andreasklindt7144
    @andreasklindt7144 Рік тому +824

    In Europe you forgot Malta! The Maltese asked England to help them against Napoleon's forces, they did. The British navy arrived in 1798 - and they stayed until 1964. Malta became officially part of the Empire in 1814 and regained its independence 200 years later.

    • @skierskymichael2681
      @skierskymichael2681 Рік тому +7

      No invadet but England supported invaders like protestant Prussia particulary in XVIII by partition of Poland … UK plays friend but it is enemy of Poland…

    • @the98themperoroftheholybri33
      @the98themperoroftheholybri33 Рік тому +12

      It's still remembered the resistance the Maltese gave against the Axis bombers

    • @stanislavl8356
      @stanislavl8356 Рік тому +5

      Prior to this Malta, or SMOM as you want, elected Pavel I as a protector against Buonaparte in 1798 after islands were captured. But Pavel was killed and his son Alexander renounced his claim in 1803 with full support of the Pope (catalicism ordo conflicted with orthodox custos). Very interesting and not wide known fact. Who knows what would have happened if Alexander had balls, because his father of course had plans for Malta. "British navy arrived in 1798" not in 1799?

    • @andreasklindt7144
      @andreasklindt7144 Рік тому +4

      @@stanislavl8356 Rear Admiral Sir Horatio Nelson arrived with the HMS Vanguard and the HMS Minotaur on the 24 October 1798 at Gozo. The French surrendered the island to the British on 28 October, which also effectivly started the British blockade. The French on Malta retreated to Valetta, kicked the civilians out of the city, and finaly surrendered in september 1800, if I remember correctly.
      Pavel I., at this time de facto Grand Master of the Knights Hospitaller (Order of Knights of the Hospital of Saint John of Jerusalem), was not really having balls or not. The fact that the Knights Hospitaller lost 90% of their income sources - including Malta, their "HQ" - to Napoleons wars, was significantly more severe. And that he was never de jure ratified as Grand Master by the Pope. The order was broke, Alexander would've had no ressources to do anything.
      In 1834 the order settled in Rome and became the Souvereign Military Order of Malta (SMOM). The order is quite unique, since it is kind of a souvereign state without a country. It has it's own embassies, international relations to 120 countries, passports, license plates and special observer status at the UN. It's main activities today is humanitarian aid.

    • @stanislavl8356
      @stanislavl8356 Рік тому +1

      @@andreasklindt7144 "was not really having balls or not" Disagree. Treaty of Paris is a key point here. Yeap, de facto British hold Malta since 1800, but again who knows what would have happened if Alexander had not
      nullified claims by himself. There are were enough resources to obtain Poland and no resources for a little Malta at the same time, nonsense as for me. Thanks for a date clarification. Finally, history does not tolerate the subjunctive mood.

  • @philliplee9545
    @philliplee9545 Рік тому +101

    In Asia, UK sent troops to Korea during the Korean War 1950-53 with over 60,000 troops with 1,100 KIA. I'm sure S. Koreans do not look at Britain as "invaders" but nevertheless, if you are mentioning some other instances such as Iceland in this video which in comparison was very peaceful and cooperative from the host country, the sacrifice of British troops to defend S. Korea against communism is worthy of mentioning and remembering.

    • @xtinct77able
      @xtinct77able Рік тому +1

      거문도 사건은 뭔데? 거기 영국 수병 무덤도 아직 있는데

    • @xtinct77able
      @xtinct77able Рік тому +2

      영국이랑 러시아랑 아프가니스탄 땅따먹기의 연장선으로 조선에 들어왔는데
      Britain=Invader

    • @xx765
      @xx765 Рік тому +6

      Man I don't know... was it also a sacrifice that they made in Iraq to 'protect' the people there from an evil regime? The one in Afganistan was the same then? Do you feel the same towards the 'sacrifice' that Russian troops are making to protect Ukranian people from some other evil regime? Or do you know so much about Korean and Russian histories that you can tell which side is 'the bad guys'?

    • @piggysew797
      @piggysew797 Рік тому +2

      @@xx765 Iraq and Afghanistan were no doubt a illegitimate use of British troops, but South Korea on the other hand was absolutely justified to protect S.Korea and stop the spread of communism. They are certainly not comparable.

    • @cambellsolar6934
      @cambellsolar6934 Рік тому

      Actually, it's easy to predict the North Korea will take over South in not far future.

  • @saisuhas7107
    @saisuhas7107 3 роки тому +2396

    The video would be a lot smaller if it was about every country England hasn't invaded

  • @nelgw
    @nelgw 4 роки тому +793

    "Hey look at this island lets conquer it"
    a couple hundred years later:
    "why do i hear God save the Queen"

    • @infinityxtanishq8712
      @infinityxtanishq8712 4 роки тому +17

      Britain should actually be made to pay for its crimes....

    • @Kallum-Bone
      @Kallum-Bone 4 роки тому +32

      INFINITY x Tanishq what for things we done hundreds of years ago when society was completely different to how it is now

    • @doctorwoah9672
      @doctorwoah9672 4 роки тому +14

      If i had a nickel for every time britan try to invade Argentina and failed i would have 2 nickels, that isnt much but is strange it happened twice

    • @Chuked
      @Chuked 4 роки тому +37

      @@infinityxtanishq8712 like how? People who live in Britain now deserve punishment for the things their ancestors did? Give me a break

    • @saldan3985
      @saldan3985 4 роки тому +4

      @@infinityxtanishq8712 nah, I think the queen saying "Hey, sorry my ancestors invaded most of the planet that one time, any way cheers" in an official royal speech would be good enough.

  • @exaaalted
    @exaaalted 3 роки тому +4083

    I feel like this explains why English is the universal language...

    • @PM-sh1jz
      @PM-sh1jz 3 роки тому +321

      The world would have a lot more wars today if everyone still didn't understand each other.

    • @Paul.......
      @Paul....... 3 роки тому +121

      @*O MITO* and look! Theres still wars!

    • @noorulhasan4904
      @noorulhasan4904 3 роки тому +65

      Universal?wait so the alien that speak English..........oh ok it make sense

    • @Siegmeyer_
      @Siegmeyer_ 3 роки тому +15

      @@noorulhasan4904 So does that mean Aliens have universal remote controls?

    • @willmdmv8848
      @willmdmv8848 3 роки тому +135

      It started with British conquest
      Then followed by American capitalism (products, services, technology, entertainment….)
      A couple factors why English is so dominant

  • @AKknapper
    @AKknapper Рік тому +3

    I was recently wondering if anyone made this video, glad I found it!

  • @archangel7772
    @archangel7772 3 роки тому +837

    The British looking at a world map: that belongs to me

    • @Tempusverum
      @Tempusverum 3 роки тому +15

      🎶This land is mine. God gave this land to me🎵

    • @user-ne1vt6qp7t
      @user-ne1vt6qp7t 3 роки тому +3

      especially if they bought the map

    • @DanielRand
      @DanielRand 3 роки тому +9

      World Map is a weird way to spell "map of the United Kingdom"

    • @joker6.p
      @joker6.p 3 роки тому +1

      As a Briton I can attest to this

    • @TheNewFanny
      @TheNewFanny 3 роки тому +1

      Except Mongolia

  • @figueiredomarcos
    @figueiredomarcos 2 роки тому +4072

    As a Brazilian citizen I also feel disrespected and humiliated that England did not think of Brazil as worthy to conquer

    • @altug7032
      @altug7032 2 роки тому +97

      ahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahah

    • @arnoldsadinmaa1443
      @arnoldsadinmaa1443 2 роки тому +215

      Na cause Portuguese invaded

    • @matthewburris769
      @matthewburris769 2 роки тому +110

      too jungle-y.

    • @k.c1126
      @k.c1126 2 роки тому +286

      More like Portugal was their only friend on the continent for many a year .... lol .

    • @fredbarker9201
      @fredbarker9201 2 роки тому +245

      England was always allied with Portugal that’s probably why
      Also it was an incredibly skilled and successful British sailor, Thomas Cochrane, who help fight and win independence for Chile and Brazil

  • @Oh_the_humanity
    @Oh_the_humanity 4 роки тому +708

    Other Countries: *exist*
    Britain: “...is for me?”🥺👉👈

  • @diki1967
    @diki1967 Рік тому +5

    One Englishman you have a fool
    Two Englishmen you have a club
    Three Englishmen you have an Empire

  • @faris76
    @faris76 4 роки тому +774

    Switzerland: *eating popcorn*

    • @DustyDuk.
      @DustyDuk. 4 роки тому +52

      11/10 would be neutral again

    • @Soff1859
      @Soff1859 4 роки тому +6

      En guete

    • @Azet_KMN
      @Azet_KMN 4 роки тому +5

      Züri isch de bescht kanton und fuck alain bersert!! Mached schuele zue!!

    • @ceriuslawliet8766
      @ceriuslawliet8766 4 роки тому +26

      Sorry old chap we've sailed every coastline but haven't discovered this nation... Sure it's a real place?

    • @FriedEgg101
      @FriedEgg101 4 роки тому +4

      And Thailand.

  • @SuzutakeJP
    @SuzutakeJP 3 роки тому +605

    5:34 *Armenia: “if I stay still, they won’t see me.”*

    • @PynApolJosh
      @PynApolJosh 3 роки тому +10

      HAHAHAHA

    • @suren2313
      @suren2313 3 роки тому +8

      Lmao

    • @canadian__ninja
      @canadian__ninja 3 роки тому +18

      This is a strategy they used throughout their history and they were never invaded, not even once.

    • @gymrat5014
      @gymrat5014 3 роки тому +45

      @@canadian__ninja insert persians macedinians romans arabs and turks(all under various dynasties)

    • @matthewmcguire224
      @matthewmcguire224 3 роки тому +7

      @@gymrat5014 ok besides them damnit lol

  • @fuegobans
    @fuegobans 4 роки тому +1431

    Countries : exist
    England: "it's free real estate"

    • @blubfishuwaaa
      @blubfishuwaaa 4 роки тому +13

      not funny

    • @inguunenkhtaivan9146
      @inguunenkhtaivan9146 4 роки тому +1

      More than one man's life is not free real estate.

    • @muhammadjhanzeb4076
      @muhammadjhanzeb4076 4 роки тому +9

      The truth sure hurts

    • @tabeebrahman4843
      @tabeebrahman4843 4 роки тому +38

      To be fair most countries that england invaded weren’t countries as we know them today before the british came, its britain who generalised land masses then split them into chunks, bordered them started civil wars and then left

    • @zzygyy
      @zzygyy 4 роки тому +3

      Age of conquest. Shit happens

  • @muhammaduvais9624
    @muhammaduvais9624 Рік тому +25

    Random piece of rock: **resting on the Ocean**
    England: *And I took that personally*

  • @wimaranes
    @wimaranes 2 місяці тому +1

    You forgot Portugal, a de facto protectorate during the Napoleonic wars, under Beresford, until 1820; also the Madeira Archipelago was occupied during those same wars, but really great video :-)

  • @ramen_9588
    @ramen_9588 4 роки тому +698

    World: **Exists**
    England: Its mine

    • @shazmeertv44
      @shazmeertv44 4 роки тому +1

      Check my channel i made an among us compilation

    • @flipflop9561
      @flipflop9561 4 роки тому +2

      Except poland

    • @CoreRealm
      @CoreRealm 4 роки тому +1

      @@flipflop9561 and Russia

    • @Qingep
      @Qingep 4 роки тому +2

      @@shazmeertv44 Among us is shit

    • @blossom99-
      @blossom99- 4 роки тому

      @@CoreRealm pretty sure he said Russia got invaded too but aight

  • @skymaster4121
    @skymaster4121 3 роки тому +1401

    Next: a shorter video: “all the countries that England hasn’t invaded”....

    • @stanleywoodison8699
      @stanleywoodison8699 3 роки тому +30

      we don't care we'll fight any bugger ...

    • @8tonystark8
      @8tonystark8 3 роки тому +16

      Could be a vine video

    • @Fylnnn
      @Fylnnn 3 роки тому +4

      Not too much

    • @Jan-Sery
      @Jan-Sery 3 роки тому +15

      I think it would have been better if the Czech republic was "invaded" by the UK and US instead of the Soviet Union after the WW2.

    • @gembly3237
      @gembly3237 3 роки тому +1

      @@Jan-Sery we gotta deal with that though, we can't change history

  • @noidadeepti
    @noidadeepti 3 роки тому +2054

    "Did you manage to invaid 90% of the world"
    British empire: Yes
    "What did it cost ?"
    British empire: Sunsets

    • @azia5051
      @azia5051 3 роки тому +26

      At lest they were rich back then unlike today. Lol

    • @Jose04537
      @Jose04537 3 роки тому +36

      @@HitCannon People don't dimension who much luxury and commodity they have, compared to even royal monarchy of the past. Running water, electricity, artificial climatization, fast transportation & communications, abundant, cheap & long lasting food.

    • @bob69927
      @bob69927 3 роки тому +23

      @@azia5051 we were broke when we had an empire

    • @davidsilverfield835
      @davidsilverfield835 3 роки тому +1

      Lol

    • @ps4logic87
      @ps4logic87 3 роки тому +13

      @@azia5051 if you look around central London, you will see McLaren, Bentley's, Rolls Royces, Porsches, Lamborghinis,I even saw Bugattis

  • @elphonsaminis
    @elphonsaminis Рік тому +52

    As a British person I am very proud of our status as histories final boss.

    • @HarmonicaGuitar
      @HarmonicaGuitar Рік тому +3

      Вы не финальный босс, а фашистские ублюдки, которым наступает финальный конец.

    • @mohdadeeb1829
      @mohdadeeb1829 Рік тому +5

      Based! As an Indian.

    • @____o____279
      @____o____279 Рік тому +8

      As an American I am jealous

    • @DeamonDragoon
      @DeamonDragoon Рік тому

      @@____o____279your the final boss of the 21st century. You have stepped in as the final boss,

    • @doraemon61377
      @doraemon61377 Рік тому +1

      Napoleon hated England the most.

  • @blobfishyyyyy7640
    @blobfishyyyyy7640 3 роки тому +903

    New English Soldier: Okay, so how many enemies am I going to fight?
    Great Britain: Yes.

    • @h4rdi7g3
      @h4rdi7g3 3 роки тому +14

      Practice makes perfect

    • @lanishajackson2677
      @lanishajackson2677 3 роки тому +2

      Ok so how many countries will I see as my enemy? Who actually attacked GB 🇬🇧?
      No1

    • @lonimox3817
      @lonimox3817 3 роки тому +2

      Is England the only place in Britain

    • @kriichan6100
      @kriichan6100 3 роки тому +5

      @@lonimox3817 no but England has typically always had the most say

    • @Caterblock
      @Caterblock 3 роки тому +1

      @@lonimox3817 no lmao, there's England, Wales, Scotland, Ireland, and Northern Ireland

  • @ravercorum20
    @ravercorum20 4 роки тому +764

    *England:* Gets invaded, conquered and colonized for most of its early history
    *The rest of the world 100s of years later:* Why do I hear boss music?

    • @BritishEmpireForHisMajesty
      @BritishEmpireForHisMajesty 4 роки тому +39

      Last successfully invaded in 1066 baby!

    • @torinjones3221
      @torinjones3221 4 роки тому

      Dungeon keeper?

    • @ravercorum20
      @ravercorum20 4 роки тому

      @@Lorddonen Upboat my comment baby!

    • @Oh_the_humanity
      @Oh_the_humanity 4 роки тому +5

      @@Lorddonen why are there so many people with your pfp and similar usernames spending their time whining for hours instead making their own comments?

    • @Oh_the_humanity
      @Oh_the_humanity 4 роки тому +2

      @@Lorddonen ok but other than the fact that whether or not this is funny ( I literally do not care) there are like six people with your pfp cropped slightly differently, with your name switched around a bit, commenting “this isn’t funny” everywhere.

  • @Darkest_matter
    @Darkest_matter 4 роки тому +514

    England: land
    America: Oil
    Hotel: Trivago

  • @CarlWheatley-wi2cl
    @CarlWheatley-wi2cl Місяць тому +1

    British schoolkid: "got history class next on places we've invaded"
    Other schoolkid: "OK, I'll see you next term".

  • @frootluips7970
    @frootluips7970 4 роки тому +439

    “Everything the light touches is our kingdom.”
    “What about that shadowy place?”
    “That’s France. We’ll get it one of these days.”

    • @mitjed
      @mitjed 4 роки тому +18

      The British / Coalitions painted napoleon as a hungry warmonger, but during that time they were conquering lots of lands around the world and a warmonger themeselves.

    • @vhalnor6775
      @vhalnor6775 4 роки тому +2

      @Leroy Jenkins 2.0 dis (sorry don't want to do a spitch in english you can still translate, I understand english but debating with a Yankies pissed me that's why (I know that you aren't one but still)), t'as oublié quand la France a gardé un certain pouvoir en Angleterre, tellement longtemps qu'elle en a perdu une partie de sa langue, genre 400 ans environ.

    • @williammerkel1410
      @williammerkel1410 4 роки тому +1

      @Leroy Jenkins 2.0 maybe he is so bad at it that he gives up mid-sentence.

    • @skyrimdominator0150
      @skyrimdominator0150 4 роки тому

      @Leroy Jenkins 2.0 you know he was saying that as a joke, right?

    • @r32guy85
      @r32guy85 4 роки тому

      and spain lmao, they tried getting spain multiple times but failed

  • @sidhantkashyap4045
    @sidhantkashyap4045 4 роки тому +446

    The world : HOSTS A PARTY
    Britain : INVADES THE PARTY

    • @HighLatencyEmu
      @HighLatencyEmu 4 роки тому +4

      We are the party

    • @kerriekupar6466
      @kerriekupar6466 4 роки тому +10

      US: Throws tea in the harbor during the party.

    • @clementwolf4081
      @clementwolf4081 4 роки тому

      @@HighLatencyEmu in the words of dan from nerdcubed in democracy 2 " i want to have the party party"

    • @sensei2067
      @sensei2067 4 роки тому

      ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢛⢛⡛⡻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
      ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⢱⡔⡝⣜⣜⢜⢜⡲⡬⡉⢕⢆⢏⢎⢇⢇⣧⡉⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
      ⣿⣿⡟⡱⣸⠸⢝⢅⢆⢖⣜⣲⣵⣴⣱⣈⡣⣋⢣⠭⣢⣒⣬⣕⣄⣝⡻⢿⣿⣿
      ⣿⠟⡜⣎⢎⢇⢇⣵⣷⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠛⢿⣦⢵⣷⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠓⢲⡝⣿
      ⢏⢰⢱⣞⢜⢵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠐⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣻⣿⣿⣿⠡⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣺
      ⢕⢜⢕⢕⢵⠹⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠸⠗⣀⠄⠄⣼⣻⣿⣿⣿⡀⢾⠆⣀⠄⠄⣰⢳
      ⡕⣝⢜⡕⣕⢝⣜⢙⢿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣥⣤⣾⢟⠸⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣉⣤⡴⢫⣾
      ⡪⡪⣪⢪⢎⢮⢪⡪⡲⢬⢩⢩⢩⠩⢍⡪⢔⢆⢏⡒⠮⠭⡙⡙⠭⢝⣨⣶⣿⣿
      ⡪⡪⡎⡮⡪⡎⡮⡪⣪⢣⢳⢱⢪⢝⢜⢜⢕⢝⢜⢎⢧⢸⢱⡹⡍⡆⢿⣿⣿⣿
      ⡪⡺⡸⡪⡺⣸⠪⠚⡘⠊⠓⠕⢧⢳⢹⡸⣱⢹⡸⡱⡱⡕⡵⡱⡕⣝⠜⢿⣿⣿
      ⡪⡺⡸⡪⡺⢐⢪⢑⢈⢁⢋⢊⠆⠲⠰⠬⡨⡡⣁⣉⠨⡈⡌⢥⢱⠐⢕⣼⣿⣿
      ⡪⣪⢣⢫⠪⢢⢅⢥⢡⢅⢅⣑⡨⡑⠅⠕⠔⠔⠄⠤⢨⠠⡰⠠⡂⣎⣼⣿⣿⣿
      ⠪⣪⡪⡣⡫⡢⡣⡣⡣⡣⡣⣣⢪⡪⡣⡣⡲⣑⡒⡎⡖⢒⣢⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
      ⢁⢂⠲⠬⠩⣁⣙⢊⡓⠝⠎⠮⠮⠚⢎⡣⡳⠕⡉⣬⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
      ⢐⠐⢌⠐⠅⡂⠄⠄⢌⢉⠩⠡⡉⠍⠄⢄⠢⡁⡢⠠⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

  • @ryantruax4635
    @ryantruax4635 3 роки тому +1278

    I like how Iceland got invaded and all they did was protest like "That's not very nice Britan. You didn't even call first. No soup for you"

    • @azia5051
      @azia5051 3 роки тому +62

      Or why just say no “tea” today. Lol

    • @hf4124
      @hf4124 3 роки тому +35

      @@azia5051 ok yeah that's worse 😭

    • @Pabloto-dq3sx
      @Pabloto-dq3sx 3 роки тому +11

      @@azia5051 if that was the case they would have killed them all.

    • @KaotikBOOO
      @KaotikBOOO 3 роки тому +16

      Well they have no army, even the pope's army is bigger xD

    • @KaotikBOOO
      @KaotikBOOO 2 роки тому +16

      @@JohnDoe-on8gl haha
      Yes, we're used to see them in parade uniforms but the Swiss guards are actual soldier taken into the Swiss army, the officers also are a real thing, not just ceremonial
      A bit like Buckingham palace guards, they look fancy with their uniforms but the guys underneath are real military personnel taken in the British army

  • @sutty85
    @sutty85 Рік тому +7

    My Cuban husband said his teacher was angry that Britain handed Havana back to the Spanish or he could bave been a British subject and wouldn't have had Fidel.

    • @Michelle-rdz17
      @Michelle-rdz17 11 місяців тому

      The Spanish were really bad at managing their “colonies” lol. Ik cuz my moms Colombian.

  • @_chase_lol1154
    @_chase_lol1154 2 роки тому +1021

    imagine being a british student back in the 1900’s and having to color all those places

    • @machupikachu1085
      @machupikachu1085 2 роки тому +25

      lol cramps!

    • @akadam90
      @akadam90 2 роки тому

      imagine being british and deciding that the prisoners should be carted off to Australia... we should have left them here and fucked off to Australia :P

    • @danko5866
      @danko5866 2 роки тому +10

      Cursed comment

    • @alan1340
      @alan1340 2 роки тому +11

      The colour used was pink.

    • @anteep4900
      @anteep4900 2 роки тому +3

      Would be pretty good for their geographical knowledge

  • @garply101
    @garply101 4 роки тому +4290

    I think the Brits should be the first to colonize Mars. We should send the best and most experienced first.

    • @rudmanpaul2812
      @rudmanpaul2812 4 роки тому +291

      No pub tho? What do you do when you get there?

    • @keithmacfarlane5907
      @keithmacfarlane5907 4 роки тому +192

      Could send the Welfare Migrants first and free up the hotel space in U.K.

    • @shaunfoley8679
      @shaunfoley8679 4 роки тому +42

      Haha love it 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇬🇧

    • @fatetestarossa2774
      @fatetestarossa2774 4 роки тому +11

      NOICE : )))))))
      jajjajajajajajajjajajajajajajajajjajajajajjajajaj

    • @josef596
      @josef596 4 роки тому +6

      das uberkät - Simple, just build one.

  • @erickveraurra3497
    @erickveraurra3497 4 роки тому +402

    USA: *invades Afghanistan*
    UK: I raised that kid

    • @eliyahufogel
      @eliyahufogel 4 роки тому +37

      When your kid finally learns.. 🤧

    • @hlamb9500
      @hlamb9500 4 роки тому +25

      USA is making us proud 😂

    • @LedosKell
      @LedosKell 4 роки тому +36

      "Most walk so their sons can run. We ran so that boy could fly." - UK

    • @AA-hg5fk
      @AA-hg5fk 4 роки тому +21

      I don't think they're as good at conquering as we were, they couldn't even win in Vietnam!

    • @erickveraurra3497
      @erickveraurra3497 4 роки тому +7

      @@AA-hg5fk true

  • @IAmNinboy
    @IAmNinboy Рік тому +9

    Wales was the first nation invaded wholly by England. I assumed that would be in this video from the title 'ENGLAND has invaded'. England is not a synonym for Britain.

  • @bingkoirekt5057
    @bingkoirekt5057 4 роки тому +645

    The world: *exist*
    England: Is for me?👉👈

    • @arnoldukra
      @arnoldukra 4 роки тому +5

      lmao

    • @Aasn9
      @Aasn9 4 роки тому +2

      Since 1684, when the Vipers Of Venice took control of the Bank Of England. The headline should read...

    • @Aasn9
      @Aasn9 4 роки тому +1

      P. G.M England became a corporation and forgot the Law that made the U.K. great. The Bank Of England is guilty of many things but altruism is not one of them. Charles II was our last King that ruled as Monarch.

    • @normanshafty
      @normanshafty 3 роки тому +1

      Did you not know that God is an Englishman?

    • @Chill1227
      @Chill1227 3 роки тому +1

      @@normanshafty it’s implied

  • @theplugcharlie7483
    @theplugcharlie7483 4 роки тому +899

    “Every country England has invaded”
    Yakkos world starts playing

    • @GeorgeDenis.
      @GeorgeDenis. 4 роки тому +30

      United States
      Canada
      Mexico
      Panama

    • @pawn1234
      @pawn1234 4 роки тому +27

      @@GeorgeDenis. haiti jamaica peru

    • @matas253
      @matas253 4 роки тому +21

      @@pawn1234 Republic Dominican, Cuba, Caribbean, Greenland, El Salvador too

    • @jerungbiru55
      @jerungbiru55 4 роки тому +18

      Puerto rico

    • @winstonbritto2789
      @winstonbritto2789 4 роки тому +20

      Colombia, Venezuela, Honduras, Guyana, and still

  • @aduncan520
    @aduncan520 3 роки тому +305

    Diversify your portfolio
    Britain: okay

  • @simplesimon5739
    @simplesimon5739 Рік тому +6

    This can be explained in our strong desire to build roads, railroads, and parliamentary democracy.

  • @paulmk2290
    @paulmk2290 3 роки тому +1610

    As a Brit, I find this a bit embarrassing. I mean, how on earth did we miss so much of America?

    • @fmp_sharl
      @fmp_sharl 3 роки тому +164

      he probably skipped the falklands to avoid controversy lol

    • @prestigev6131
      @prestigev6131 3 роки тому +67

      Probably had something to do with the Monroe doctrine. The USA basically told Europe to stop creating new colonies in the Americas and it somehow worked... kinda

    • @jmajor1915
      @jmajor1915 3 роки тому +71

      US: Monroe Doctorine...
      UK:* *laughs*
      US: What?
      *Canada towers over America*

    • @Rizz_guy
      @Rizz_guy 3 роки тому +26

      Didnt the british empire took over whole america after the french surrendered?

    • @HOBBL3
      @HOBBL3 3 роки тому +13

      It was all aggressively defended by natives and had no transportation systems in place, I think that’s why but not sure. Also Had to keep close to the sea for the Royal Navy to supply etc

  • @DerGrosTitan
    @DerGrosTitan 4 роки тому +518

    Literally any country: Guess Ill be neutra-
    England: How about you *DONT*

    • @shazmeertv44
      @shazmeertv44 4 роки тому

      Check my channel i made an among us compilation

    • @channel_no_longer_active
      @channel_no_longer_active 4 роки тому +14

      @@shazmeertv44 No

    • @lorenzomagicdm7537
      @lorenzomagicdm7537 4 роки тому +4

      Only Switzerland was not annexed by the British and it is insanely neutral

    • @DerGrosTitan
      @DerGrosTitan 4 роки тому +1

      @@lorenzomagicdm7537 although england never annexef switzerlanf, it did technically invade it during ww2 along with nazi and american aircrafts.

    • @koya6470
      @koya6470 4 роки тому

      @@DerGrosTitan any aircraft that entered Swiss airspace was shot down allies or axis

  • @ThuggDuckk
    @ThuggDuckk 4 роки тому +481

    Country: *minds it's own business
    Britain: *where is my flag?!*

    • @HighLatencyEmu
      @HighLatencyEmu 4 роки тому +6

      Oooo, look there, it's flying nice and high in your capital, ooopsies

    • @davidtuttle7556
      @davidtuttle7556 4 роки тому +1

      @@HighLatencyEmu Ueah they tried that here. After about three days they pulled out when they realized we hate washington politicians more than they did and that burning the town was actually a favor. That and when one of ours gave a general of theirs a third eye, they skedaddled and never came back.

    • @ThuggDuckk
      @ThuggDuckk 3 роки тому

      @Return of the grapes. You would possibly understand with the limited neurons in your brain.

    • @davidtuttle7556
      @davidtuttle7556 3 роки тому

      @Return of the grapes. Open a history book. Battle of North, Bombardment of Fort McHenry. Occupation of Washington Point. 1814 Chesapeake Campaign. Read about it.

    • @davidtuttle7556
      @davidtuttle7556 3 роки тому

      @Return of the grapes. Well truth be told, losing efforts qnd foreign wars tend to get less attention in most countries and education systems. Remember education is by its very nature indoctrination into some sort of philosophy or set of cultural norms. But yes as an American we tend to have an adverse reaction to the windage usually coming out of Washington, DC. You m8ght say that we scorn and dislike those assholes more than we dislike you.

  • @cleothechicken686
    @cleothechicken686 Рік тому +23

    As a singaporean I knew that Britain has colonised us and our neighbour and I am proud to be part British!

  • @tomduke8788
    @tomduke8788 2 роки тому +739

    I'm British and I once got asked, by a Pacific Islander, when our independence day was. I had to explain that it was from my country that everyone else celebrated independence.

    • @USERNAMEfieldempty
      @USERNAMEfieldempty 2 роки тому +83

      Tell the Dutch, The French, The Danes and Germans and Scandinavians that. They all invaded Britain and NEVER WENT HOME.

    • @jacob2808
      @jacob2808 2 роки тому +31

      @@USERNAMEfieldempty Not technically correct

    • @Hugh.G.Rectionx
      @Hugh.G.Rectionx 2 роки тому +28

      @@USERNAMEfieldempty the dutch never invaded, french were beaten last time they did, danes were beaten last time they did along with Scandinavians and germans never succeeded. any more? hahaha

    • @TankManHeavy
      @TankManHeavy 2 роки тому +5

      @@USERNAMEfieldempty cope + seethe

    • @TornadoShaunUK
      @TornadoShaunUK 2 роки тому +19

      @@Hugh.G.Rectionx Actually think it's fair to say the Danes did succeed for a time.

  • @Musikur
    @Musikur 4 роки тому +442

    “the day that his majesty’s armies graced your shores with their presence was the most important day of your miserable existence. But for us, it was Tuesday”

    • @veruspatri
      @veruspatri 4 роки тому +28

      Such confidence can only come from British nobility. To have anyhope of gaining favor with the Crown, one has to first be noticed. The easiest way for a officer of nobility to be noticed halfway around the 🌎 ... Conquer something in His Majesty's name.
      This competitiveness for the Crowns favour between the noble families, built the British Empire.

    • @danielmatthews4149
      @danielmatthews4149 4 роки тому +3

      What's this from?

    • @Kangaroos_News
      @Kangaroos_News 4 роки тому +3

      @@danielmatthews4149 I wanna know too lol it sounds like a good one that would have fit a Greek, Carthaginian, Roman or Brit lol

    • @danielmatthews4149
      @danielmatthews4149 4 роки тому +5

      @@Kangaroos_News ikr such a chad quote

    • @itsbloodyengland9835
      @itsbloodyengland9835 4 роки тому +5

      im just waiting for someone to correc you to *chewsday because haha funny-

  • @VEE3RDEYE
    @VEE3RDEYE 4 роки тому +2450

    Britain is such a small island yet somehow claimed 60% of the world??? hahahahahaha we are a bored bunch

    • @ruibrito8141
      @ruibrito8141 4 роки тому +17

      No u didn't

    • @ruibrito8141
      @ruibrito8141 4 роки тому +74

      U claimed 25%

    • @anonb4632
      @anonb4632 4 роки тому +65

      If you think it is a small island, try walking from one end to the other. Ellis Island, Heligoland or Guernsey are small islands...

    • @klchai7884
      @klchai7884 4 роки тому +58

      @@ruibrito8141 Anglo-Saxons' des-truc-tion of the world, human beings, human civilization, etc. is a great tra-ge-dy of human history. Their culture has created their bru-tal , gree-d y , of-fen-sive, In-va-sive behavior like the most vicious cancer cells in human body penetrating everywhere in the world, Britain, ARMerica, Australia, Canada, New Zealand etc. are their l o o t s , they are not the native there originally, their e x t r e m e acts of p l u n-d e-r i n g des-troy-ed the harmony of the world and humans which originally maintained an ecological balance in nature, they I n v a d e d more than half of the world, hundreds of millions of human beings have been k i l l e d by them during their ag-gre-ssive behavior, the cultural relics of countries lo-ot-ed and des-troy-ed are countless, the exhibits in the Great Britain Museum in London illustrate all this, but that is only the tip of the iceberg.
      Sadly, in the 21st century, this e x t r e m e l y u-gly human character is still prevailing and destroying the world and human being which represented and lead by the ARMerica government, it uses its powerful mi-li-ta-ry power, continue to obstruct the progress of the world and human civilization with extreme b r u t a l, s h a m e l e s s , most d I s g u s t I n g and greediest actions. It has become a major obstacle to human progress and peaceful coexistence. The Anglo-Saxons and today’s ARMerica government are useless except for op- pres-sing the world’s human right and civilization. The ARMerica government’s complete inability to deal with the current virus pandemic is an excellent proof that they are a paper tiger. They are so Incompetent, incapable in doing something good to human, they are shameless, good for nothing good except lying, rumors fabrication, demonize, blaming, pushing of responsibility to other nation or organization who is doing better than it , and all kinds of atrocities against humanity have reached the highest peak of humanity, and they are clamoring for freedom, democracy, and human rights, but the real fact is that their behavior which violation of human freedom, democracy, and human rights is the most intrusive in human history, their wanton killing of humans, extreme plundering and destruction of human civilization can no longer be repaired, and these behaviors are still continuing today. Who in the world can end this most inhumane behavior in human history? Stop it from continuing in harming the world and mankind? Yes, the rise of the great eastern civilized ancient nation will change all of this and the process and destiny of mankind, the west export only war, military power, weapon, mass slaughtering, day light killing and assassination, booming of other nation’s embassy, colonization, slave trade, demonizing, fabricating of lies and rumors, creating of fake video, blaming, organizing and leading the illegal violent activities in other country, support the illegal group of people against their nation, spying, looting and destroying of other nations’ historical and culture relics etc. etc…… , in fact, there is no end in writing out the bad things the western country did, and just opposite, the eastern great nation does not do all these things against human survival and improvement, great eastern country’s government exports only technology, construction, pandemic essential materials etc. only, and some more, it is so keen in improving the human living standard as a whole so that it planned and launch a super major project which unprecedented in human history-one belt one road, it is why it is qualified to be the biggest hi-tech entrepreneur and capitalist in the world, it is so easy to differentiate good and bad with just a simple compare..Chai from Malaysia.

    • @richardpoynton4026
      @richardpoynton4026 4 роки тому +35

      I think we had, as a nation, the worst case of ADHD ever...

  • @pearofgeeksii8156
    @pearofgeeksii8156 Рік тому +10

    You missed some, off the top of my head: Greenland, Malta, Falklands & Faroe Islands.

    • @gnezlukc
      @gnezlukc 3 місяці тому

      Falklands had a whole thing

    • @pearofgeeksii8156
      @pearofgeeksii8156 3 місяці тому

      @@gnezlukc just because there was a war does not mean Britain was the invader. You can't invade your own sovereign territory.

    • @sambmortimer
      @sambmortimer 3 місяці тому

      @@pearofgeeksii8156 The Falklands were uninhabited islands when Britain colonised them, so I wouldn't call that an 'invasion' per se, more just picking up a piece of unclaimed land

  • @darkstock5103
    @darkstock5103 3 роки тому +641

    Wait, if everyone in Star Wars speaks or understands English, does that mean...

    • @corey2232
      @corey2232 3 роки тому +107

      Yes, the British invaded Tatooine & quickly expanded to Coruscant.

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +11

      Ok but
      Навеки соединены дружбой и трудом,
      Наши могучие республики никогда не устоят.
      Великий Советский Союз переживет века.
      Мечта народа, его крепость в безопасности!
      Да здравствует наша Советская Родина,
      Построен могучей рукой народа.
      Да здравствует наш народ, единый и свободный!
      Крепкая в нашей дружбе огнем испытанная,
      Да пусть вдохновляет наш багровый флаг,
      Сияние во славе на всеобщее обозрение!
      Через дни темные и бурные, куда вел нас Великий Ленин,
      Наши глаза увидели яркое солнце свободы наверху,
      И Сталин, наш вождь, с верой в народ,
      Вдохновили нас на строительство любимой земли!
      Мы боролись за будущее, уничтожили захватчика,
      И принес на нашу Родину Лавры Славы.
      Наша слава будет жить в памяти народов,
      и все поколения будут чтить ее имя!

    • @darkstock5103
      @darkstock5103 3 роки тому +26

      @@Owenbot3000 uh, I don’t speak Russian

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +7

      I put a translation

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +12

      Its the soviet national anthem

  • @protorhinocerator142
    @protorhinocerator142 3 роки тому +644

    America: Invades Iraq
    UK: Aw... how cute!

    • @gabyoseg
      @gabyoseg 3 роки тому +21

      *Laughs in bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki*

    • @skyguy1236
      @skyguy1236 3 роки тому +9

      @@gabyoseg laughs in nanking

    • @gabyoseg
      @gabyoseg 3 роки тому +5

      @@skyguy1236 🗿

    • @JasonTheSilence
      @JasonTheSilence 3 роки тому +10

      you mean Irak?

    • @Vibes_FC
      @Vibes_FC 3 роки тому +33

      @@gabyoseg when the British empire was at its best it didn't need nukes to win.

  • @sergiull95
    @sergiull95 3 роки тому +716

    Portugal be like: "Thank f*ck we had a contract!"

    • @lastbaratheon8043
      @lastbaratheon8043 3 роки тому +3

      😂😂

    • @ganados0
      @ganados0 3 роки тому +67

      Brits be like "Thanks for introducing us to tea, how could we possibly invade you?"

    • @nyarlathotep6465
      @nyarlathotep6465 3 роки тому +17

      Still technically invaded in August 1808, just pretended we were 'ahem' fighting the French as an excuse to get away with a sneaky one

    • @makemap
      @makemap 3 роки тому +4

      Um, ya. The Brits invaded china for Tea.

    • @alexander9703
      @alexander9703 3 роки тому +3

      During the scramble for Africa, out of nowhere Britain suddenly recognised the part of the 'Inter caetera' Papal Bull that gave Portugal the rights to most of west Africa, knowing that being bros Portugal had to share with them.

  • @bjamesm
    @bjamesm Рік тому +5

    Also, British Virgin Islands, Jersey Island off the coast of France, part of Antartica, Falkland Islands, and some tiny islands in the South Atlantic.

    • @cvk4488
      @cvk4488 6 місяців тому +1

      It's not longer an empire

  • @newagetapes
    @newagetapes 4 роки тому +358

    "Serbian Serbs in Serbia"
    Y'know, in any other context except the Balkans this would be weird wording

    • @who-would-know
      @who-would-know 4 роки тому +11

      unless it is British Brits in Britain, or Spanish Spaniards in Spain.

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku 4 роки тому

      GAGAGAGAGAGA! I will now count to 3 and then I am still the unprettiest UA-camr of all time. 1...2...3. GAGAGAGAGAGA!!! Btw I have TWO very HOT GIRLfriends who I show off in my v*deos. Thank you for your attention, dear co

    • @gavinisdie
      @gavinisdie 4 роки тому

      English Englishmen in England lol

    • @neonlight1214
      @neonlight1214 4 роки тому

      Pretty sure he didn't intend to say that. If he would use that in any other country, like Britain invaded French cities, he would have also said "Spanish Spaniard targets attacked" or something. Such phrases dont exist and is a grammatical error.

    • @arrctic7283
      @arrctic7283 4 роки тому

      @@neonlight1214 +Bosnian Serbs

  • @atticusv668
    @atticusv668 4 роки тому +153

    “Being British is like being an alcoholic; whenever someone says you did something bad you find yourself going ‘honestly I don’t even remember that but yeah probably’.” - John Oliver

    • @yoshimonsterhamoomoo8413
      @yoshimonsterhamoomoo8413 4 роки тому +5

      @Ahajqjkw Njwkwkwk anw he wasn’t saying we’re bigger alcoholics. Although...have u seen our chav culture?

    • @bulletghost3452
      @bulletghost3452 4 роки тому

      Gopniks are just drunken thugs like chavs but you guys fail at mentioning the hooligan culture around sports where they usually get drunk and beat each other up over a soccer teams.

    • @anonb4632
      @anonb4632 4 роки тому

      That guy's a hypocritical twat of the first order. I suppose he's not biting the hand that feeds him since his career went nowhere when he was in England and he got his desperately unfunny show by brownnosing US execs. Oh, and he doesn't get Laibach. I think he's spent so long in the USA that his irony gland was removed.

    • @atticusv668
      @atticusv668 4 роки тому

      @@anonb4632 bro chill it’s just a quote

    • @klchai7884
      @klchai7884 4 роки тому

      @Ahajqjkw Njwkwkwk anw Anglo-Saxons' des-truc-tion of the world, human beings, human civilization, etc. is a great tra-ge-dy of human history. Their culture has created their bru-tal , gree-d y , of-fen-sive, In-va-sive behavior like the most vicious cancer cells in human body penetrating everywhere in the world, Britain, ARMerica, Australia, Canada, New Zealand etc. are their l o o t s , they are not the native there originally, their e x t r e m e acts of p l u n-d e-r i n g des-troy-ed the harmony of the world and humans which originally maintained an ecological balance in nature, they I n v a d e d more than half of the world, hundreds of millions of human beings have been k i l l e d by them during their ag-gre-ssive behavior, the cultural relics of countries lo-ot-ed and des-troy-ed are countless, the exhibits in the Great Britain Museum in London illustrate all this, but that is only the tip of the iceberg.
      Sadly, in the 21st century, this e x t r e m e l y u-gly human character is still prevailing and destroying the world and human being which represented and lead by the ARMerica government, it uses its powerful mi-li-ta-ry power, continue to obstruct the progress of the world and human civilization with extreme b r u t a l, s h a m e l e s s , most d I s g u s t I n g and greediest actions. It has become a major obstacle to human progress and peaceful coexistence. The Anglo-Saxons and today’s ARMerica government are useless except for op- pres-sing the world’s human right and civilization. The ARMerica government’s complete inability to deal with the current virus pandemic is an excellent proof that they are a paper tiger. They are so Incompetent, incapable in doing something good to human, they are shameless, good for nothing good except lying, rumors fabrication, demonize, blaming, pushing of responsibility to other nation or organization who is doing better than it , and all kinds of atrocities against humanity have reached the highest peak of humanity, and they are clamoring for freedom, democracy, and human rights, but the real fact is that their behavior which violation of human freedom, democracy, and human rights is the most intrusive in human history, their wanton killing of humans, extreme plundering and destruction of human civilization can no longer be repaired, and these behaviors are still continuing today. Who in the world can end this most inhumane behavior in human history? Stop it from continuing in harming the world and mankind? Yes, the rise of the great eastern civilized ancient nation will change all of this and the process and destiny of mankind, the west export only war, military power, weapon, mass slaughtering, day light killing and assassination, booming of other nation’s embassy, colonization, slave trade, demonizing, fabricating of lies and rumors, creating of fake video, blaming, organizing and leading the illegal violent activities in other country, support the illegal group of people against their nation, spying, looting and destroying of other nations’ historical and culture relics etc. etc…… , in fact, there is no end in writing out the bad things the western country did, and just opposite, the eastern great nation does not do all these things against human survival and improvement, great eastern country’s government exports only technology, construction, pandemic essential materials etc. only, and some more, it is so keen in improving the human living standard as a whole so that it planned and launch a super major project which unprecedented in human history-one belt one road, it is why it is qualified to be the biggest hi-tech entrepreneur and capitalist in the world, it is so easy to differentiate good and bad with just a simple compare..Chai from Malaysia.

  • @hadridurrani188
    @hadridurrani188 4 роки тому +614

    Interviewer: What are your hobbies?
    England: You know........... travelling around the world and invading them for fun.

    • @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142
      @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142 4 роки тому +9

      the twats stilL do it today. with a new form of colonisation. they use spain and their sun every summer pull europan girls an use their former colonies as a brothel holiday destination, i don't know a girl who doesn't love their fucking accent

    • @JH-zs3bs
      @JH-zs3bs 4 роки тому +7

      @@igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142 Spain never was a british colony. Or any colony whatsoever.

    • @mwafrikahalisi2549
      @mwafrikahalisi2549 4 роки тому +3

      @@JH-zs3bs The key word here is *"invaded"* and not necessarily *"colonized."* Some countries were colonize and some were not while some were just partially colonized for different periods of time.

    • @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142
      @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142 4 роки тому

      @Lurker M ьлуат. but hey you did a good job establishing those colonies so I can go too every summer

    • @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142
      @igorvyacheslavtherussianmu3142 4 роки тому +1

      @@JH-zs3bs the British screwed spain as they keep one small part of spain today as their colony and Spain keep crying about it and the British won't give it back. and they also use Spain as a favourite holiday destination I am sure at this rate they bought all your houses next to the sea and their is nothing Spain can do because it boosts your country economyeconomically

  • @aggi9995
    @aggi9995 Рік тому +6

    Icelander here, the government at the time was incredibly stupid, Britain and the US actually catapulted the economy into the modern age. They "invaded" just before we got our independence in 1944 so they didn't actually invade us but Denmark which we belonged to at the time...which had been under german occupation for a month... so to conclude they basically freed part of denmark from German occupation, this part just so happened to be Iceland, which also about 30 years later went to war with britain over some fish (the cod war)

    • @system3008
      @system3008 Рік тому

      He said it was to stop others gaining control of it.

    • @system3008
      @system3008 Рік тому

      That's why Britain left the eu for ballshit you mentioned

    • @system3008
      @system3008 Рік тому +1

      It wasn't a war if it was a war you would know about it

    • @aggi9995
      @aggi9995 Рік тому

      @@system3008 You talking about the cod war? I did know about it, that's why I mentioned it, what's your point?

    • @neil8675
      @neil8675 Рік тому

      ​@@aggi9995 Point is, it wasn't a war. Just a dispute over fishing territory. If it was a real war the Royal Navy would have blockaded you. And there's absolutely nothing Iceland could have done. But we didn't go down that road.

  • @ooofffbobsquarepants7349
    @ooofffbobsquarepants7349 3 роки тому +399

    At this point it’s more insulting if England hasn’t even tried to invade ur country seeming how they practically invaded most of the world at least once

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +4

      Chad, and Switzerland didn't get invaded.

    • @ooofffbobsquarepants7349
      @ooofffbobsquarepants7349 3 роки тому +4

      @@Owenbot3000 dw i got that coverd when i said most instead of all

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +1

      @@ooofffbobsquarepants7349 that's not what I was saying but ok.

    • @ooofffbobsquarepants7349
      @ooofffbobsquarepants7349 3 роки тому +2

      @@Owenbot3000 Then what was the point in saying that? im very confused

    • @Owenbot3000
      @Owenbot3000 3 роки тому +2

      To be completely honest I don't know

  • @octarineflame
    @octarineflame 4 роки тому +377

    If you lived in the rain and drizzle of Britain then conquering another country is the only way to get a sunny holiday in past times

    • @shaunfoley8679
      @shaunfoley8679 4 роки тому +2

      Our winters are getting warmer so we I’ll stay home and just send the Americans off to scout for land🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇬🇧

    • @jagdpanther1944
      @jagdpanther1944 4 роки тому +10

      rain and drizzle in Ireland: romantic
      rain and drizzle in Britain: terrible

    • @pinehawk9600
      @pinehawk9600 4 роки тому

      And good food

    • @ccahill2322
      @ccahill2322 3 роки тому

      octarineflame, something wrong with the weather advice in those early days. Did you ever spend a few months in Ireland looking for a sunny day? Maybe the leaders were as stupid then as they are now--I mean in almost all countries.

    • @Jabber-ig3iw
      @Jabber-ig3iw 3 роки тому

      That’s a myth to keep all the foreigners out of the country.

  • @TOM-xy4bb
    @TOM-xy4bb 3 роки тому +1016

    The world exists
    England: it's a free real estate

    • @J-678hdj
      @J-678hdj 3 роки тому +12

      *uk

    • @coffeebrown9371
      @coffeebrown9371 3 роки тому +6

      @@J-678hdj England still works

    • @J-678hdj
      @J-678hdj 3 роки тому +7

      @@coffeebrown9371
      No not really

    • @coffeebrown9371
      @coffeebrown9371 3 роки тому +9

      @@J-678hdj Wdym not really it was England in the uk that actually conquered everything *“British* Empire”

    • @wassimkh9120
      @wassimkh9120 3 роки тому +7

      england is my city

  • @bobbysands6923
    @bobbysands6923 Рік тому +33

    Now the "British Empire" is now a few rocks in the North Atlantic, and damn cold ones at that. That said, it is worthwhile visiting. Loved my time in London. Brits are awesome.

    • @JBplumbing12
      @JBplumbing12 Рік тому

      I think the Brits have done more good than bad for the world. The English speaking democracies are together the strongest force for freedom on earth, and are the countries that refugees and immigrants mostly want to go to.

    • @isziahs5951
      @isziahs5951 Рік тому +13

      Britain's always been a few rocks. It's crazy how much those tiny islands have been able to achieve.

    • @KeyDash753
      @KeyDash753 Рік тому +7

      And yet King Charles III is still king of 15 countries including Canada, Australia, and New Zealand.

    • @JBplumbing12
      @JBplumbing12 Рік тому +8

      @@isziahs5951 I think the success of the British has had to do with the collective character of the British, an island people, widely diverse but cooperative, an overall sensible people, a historically armed and well trained populace, their religion, and their Westminster system of government. It all rolled together to make a formidable nation throughout the centuries. And the English speaking people of UK, USA, Australia, NZ, Canada, are still one of the most powerful people on earth and of great benefit to the world. The Jews too, have had an extraordinary beneficial effect upon the world, and continue to do so.

    • @icedanilzation
      @icedanilzation Рік тому

      Many of its colonies still look to Britain for leadership in economics, science and industry. Also, the British Empire didn't turn off for any one reason, it simply fizzled out due to WW2, peace revolutions, value of the monarch, rise of the U.S., etc. What that means is, leftover British power still exists, it is still the center of much of the world and is still a major leader.

  • @ryanbright1363
    @ryanbright1363 3 роки тому +791

    Britain: I’m going to launch invasions
    EU: where to this time
    Britain: Yes

    • @RRR_CDS
      @RRR_CDS 3 роки тому +7

      How is feels to be British

    • @comradekenobi6908
      @comradekenobi6908 3 роки тому +6

      next the Brits will claim Mars

    • @danjames5552
      @danjames5552 3 роки тому

      @@RRR_CDS GREAT !!!

    • @PrivateMcPrivate
      @PrivateMcPrivate 3 роки тому +5

      @@comradekenobi6908 I,as an American from East Asia,Recognize their future claim.

    • @robcfc400
      @robcfc400 3 роки тому

      @@RRR_CDS Good. Thanks for asking.

  • @owenevans4212
    @owenevans4212 4 роки тому +539

    Britain - “Hey, so I did some grinding off camera...”

  • @b0bethey342
    @b0bethey342 3 роки тому +1026

    I think Britan just wanted some friends but was socially akward.

    • @bulletproofguy5112
      @bulletproofguy5112 3 роки тому +15

      Except the British are th best at smooth talk and have loads if friends, the british passport is the most accepted on earth getting the british into more nations without hassle than any other passport, true.

    • @KittyNoo
      @KittyNoo 3 роки тому +46

      @@bulletproofguy5112 sorry to say that but the British passport isn't the most accepted. For example, Japan, Germany and Singapore are more accepted.

    • @bulletproofguy5112
      @bulletproofguy5112 3 роки тому +3

      @@KittyNoo Nope your wrong, it’s a Nordic country and the UK.

    • @wet0wl
      @wet0wl 3 роки тому +26

      @@bulletproofguy5112 As a true Brit I say with a heavy heart that they’re right. Britain has 185 locations whereas Japan has 191

    • @zennar8294
      @zennar8294 3 роки тому +16

      @@bulletproofguy5112 You are right, the British passport is the best if we exclude: Japan, Singapore, South Korea, Germany, Italy, Spain, Luxembourg, Finland, Denmark Austria, Sweden, France, Portugal and the Netherlands.

  • @cnxexpat1862
    @cnxexpat1862 Рік тому +3

    Amazing how a "few" British soldiers can invade so many countries with so many citizens and had them under control over such a long time.

  • @YipPlusYap
    @YipPlusYap 4 роки тому +302

    "Who should we conquer next?"
    Great Britain: *Yes.*

  • @jackfitzgerald2955
    @jackfitzgerald2955 4 роки тому +269

    HG Wells: "Have you read my book War of the Worlds?"
    Britain: "Dont need to. I've completed it mate"

    • @smackbackgaming9861
      @smackbackgaming9861 4 роки тому +1

      Championship manager?

    • @anonb4632
      @anonb4632 4 роки тому +1

      Where do you think HG Wells got the idea from?

    • @cliveengel5744
      @cliveengel5744 4 роки тому

      And look at the UK now - on their knees, waiting for the America’s to Feed them, supply them just like 1939/1945 - after making the mistake of declaring war on Germany’s when they were not even threatened.

    • @anonb4632
      @anonb4632 4 роки тому

      @@cliveengel5744 The UK was allied with Poland in 1939. Know your history...

    • @cliveengel5744
      @cliveengel5744 4 роки тому

      @@anonb4632 why was The UK allied with Poland - they entered into an Defense pact 30 Days prior to Germany invaded - that lead to the Dunkirk defeat and subsequent loss of Empire due to the American Inspired Atlantic Charter signed by UK and US - the rest is history.. Comrade and the Glorious Soviet Armies defeated Germany by taking on May 6 1946

  • @MrSplodez
    @MrSplodez 4 роки тому +322

    Me: Impressive rock collection, Britain
    Britain: They're MINERALS

  • @veteranclips007
    @veteranclips007 2 місяці тому +3

    This was all over the search for the best Tea ☕️ 🇬🇧👍

  • @iSparkx
    @iSparkx 3 роки тому +430

    *Faint sound of Rule Britannia in the distance*
    Some random guy on an island: Why do I hear boss music?

    • @mcfrosty8739
      @mcfrosty8739 3 роки тому

      Wigan Warriors, good man I like it to see it

    • @pepitogrillo3368
      @pepitogrillo3368 3 роки тому

      I’m sure that if you knew under what context that song was composed you wouldn’t have written that comment

    • @mcfrosty8739
      @mcfrosty8739 3 роки тому

      @@pepitogrillo3368 Care to elaborate?

    • @pepitogrillo3368
      @pepitogrillo3368 3 роки тому +1

      @@mcfrosty8739 I’ll make it brief. The ‘song’ was first presented in a banquet that had been held in honor of Admiral Vernon after his easy conquest of Portobello, under this triumphant aroma a massive fleet of nearly 200 ships (the largest naval operation in history up until D-Day) was given to Vernon for him to sail to Cartagena de Indias and Capture the lightly reinforced Spanish garrison there of around 2830 (including locals) amidst a peace between Spain and England. Vernon even sent word of his victory before capturing the fortification. The English succumbed to a euphoria back in England and begun handing out medals of honour for the ‘victors’ and making coins. The defeat was humiliating, so humiliating in fact that King George II prohibited writing about the matter to try and hide it.

    • @mcfrosty8739
      @mcfrosty8739 3 роки тому +2

      @@pepitogrillo3368 Fair enough, I anticipated a pathetic PC/woke explanation about how the song had links to Britain's colonial past. Thank you for the detailed explanation though and I appreciated the level of grammar

  • @CheeseWithMold
    @CheeseWithMold 4 роки тому +314

    Country: Just chilling, minding their own business
    England: "And I took that personally..."

    • @mariahxjimin141
      @mariahxjimin141 4 роки тому +2

      England: **And I took that

    • @cfnretro6448
      @cfnretro6448 4 роки тому

      “We must liberate them from themselves. Liberate them of their land and resources” is the English motto

    • @klchai7884
      @klchai7884 4 роки тому

      @@mariahxjimin141 Anglo-Saxons' des-truc-tion of the world, human beings, human civilization, etc. is a great tra-ge-dy of human history. Their culture has created their bru-tal , gree-d y , of-fen-sive, In-va-sive behavior like the most vicious cancer cells in human body penetrating everywhere in the world, Britain, ARMerica, Australia, Canada, New Zealand etc. are their l o o t s , they are not the native there originally, their e x t r e m e acts of p l u n-d e-r i n g des-troy-ed the harmony of the world and humans which originally maintained an ecological balance in nature, they I n v a d e d more than half of the world, hundreds of millions of human beings have been k i l l e d by them during their ag-gre-ssive behavior, the cultural relics of countries lo-ot-ed and des-troy-ed are countless, the exhibits in the Great Britain Museum in London illustrate all this, but that is only the tip of the iceberg.
      Sadly, in the 21st century, this e x t r e m e l y u-gly human character is still prevailing and destroying the world and human being which represented and lead by the ARMerica government, it uses its powerful mi-li-ta-ry power, continue to obstruct the progress of the world and human civilization with extreme b r u t a l, s h a m e l e s s , most d I s g u s t I n g and greediest actions. It has become a major obstacle to human progress and peaceful coexistence. The Anglo-Saxons and today’s ARMerica government are useless except for op- pres-sing the world’s human right and civilization. The ARMerica government’s complete inability to deal with the current virus pandemic is an excellent proof that they are a paper tiger. They are so Incompetent, incapable in doing something good to human, they are shameless, good for nothing good except lying, rumors fabrication, demonize, blaming, pushing of responsibility to other nation or organization who is doing better than it , and all kinds of atrocities against humanity have reached the highest peak of humanity, and they are clamoring for freedom, democracy, and human rights, but the real fact is that their behavior which violation of human freedom, democracy, and human rights is the most intrusive in human history, their wanton killing of humans, extreme plundering and destruction of human civilization can no longer be repaired, and these behaviors are still continuing today. Who in the world can end this most inhumane behavior in human history? Stop it from continuing in harming the world and mankind? Yes, the rise of the great eastern civilized ancient nation will change all of this and the process and destiny of mankind, the west export only war, military power, weapon, mass slaughtering, day light killing and assassination, booming of other nation’s embassy, colonization, slave trade, demonizing, fabricating of lies and rumors, creating of fake video, blaming, organizing and leading the illegal violent activities in other country, support the illegal group of people against their nation, spying, looting and destroying of other nations’ historical and culture relics etc. etc…… , in fact, there is no end in writing out the bad things the western country did, and just opposite, the eastern great nation does not do all these things against human survival and improvement, great eastern country’s government exports only technology, construction, pandemic essential materials etc. only, and some more, it is so keen in improving the human living standard as a whole so that it planned and launch a super major project which unprecedented in human history-one belt one road, it is why it is qualified to be the biggest hi-tech entrepreneur and capitalist in the world, it is so easy to differentiate good and bad with just a simple compare..Chai from Malaysia.

    • @allanburgess4889
      @allanburgess4889 4 роки тому

      @@klchai7884 Technology computers invented in Great Britain.The internet a free gift to the world from GB .

    • @h4rdi7g3
      @h4rdi7g3 3 роки тому

      Not really the case to be honest.
      A lot of these countries were invaded as he said because they had alliances with enemies of Britain.
      So for a lot of them they had little choice but to colonise them before the other world powers.

  • @mastersaures9502
    @mastersaures9502 4 роки тому +308

    World: exists
    Britain: its a free real estate

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому +2

      If they don’t defend themselves 🤔

    • @lightr2187
      @lightr2187 4 роки тому

      @Eureka who didn't?

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому

      @Jim Hester We didn’t ask for them to come, we didn’t want them to come, they’ve done nothing for us, and we didn’t stay in their nations intending them to be our new homes. It was just an elite group of people doing it as at the time it was an efficient way to make money through trade. Normal British people had nothing to do with the Empire and shouldn’t deserve to suffer in some sort of bizarre cosmic retribution for it. The worst part is that the people that perpetrated the empire are still the ones profiting off of destroying native Brits’ lives as well, ruining the environment through rampant encouragement of mass-consumerism to a dumbed down global population, and are exploiting child labour nonetheless in those old imperial nations to further their agenda of turning human beings into consumption slaves. It’s not fair to try and heap blame on all Brits for this travesty of globalism because it has nothing to do with 99% of us - in the same way that WW1 was tragic because it was normal people being sacrificed (almost an entire generation of young men) for the sake of the petty wars and rivalries of the upmost European elite, and their own financial interests.

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому

      @Eureka The British empire did not genocide “half the planet” lmao. The one example most people give is what happened during WW2 in Bengali, but even the details surrounding that are highly disputed and questionable. I despise Churchill anyway, but the whole Bengali thing is overly attributed to the “evil” actions of one man, when it was caused by a whole number of factors.

    • @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713
      @orthodoxbelarussianopinion713 4 роки тому

      @Jim Hester In fairness, you could say that if you want some more territory and resources as a people, then you are welcome to go looking for it and if you fight for it and win, you may take that territory, in a sort of natural “survival of the fittest” sense. In which case, it’s up to the people who are experiencing the invasion, occupation, and even replacement to fight back, but if they don’t even fight back, then they are bringing upon them their own fate. Unfortunately our own government has actively subverted and undermined its people so that we cannot fight back even if we wanted to, and in all cases of such conflict it sides with the invaders against the natives. So the fight is maybe not as fair in terms of one side has been purposefully demoralised by its supposed “own leaders” since the conflict began. Nonetheless, we should, if one believes in the universality of nature and the sort of bizarre balance, or justice, that it eventually brings, have a right to fight back against the invasion, as any people should. The Native Americans were simply a less military developed, weaker people, so they lost.

  • @rickclaark8459
    @rickclaark8459 Рік тому +6

    Listened to this while smashing a full English breakfast and a tea. Bosh

  • @theninethrees8044
    @theninethrees8044 3 роки тому +1448

    This is why “English” is the chosen language for communication around the world.

    • @makemap
      @makemap 3 роки тому +146

      It is chosen because it has way less alphabets than all other languages making it a universal language among everyone else.

    • @greendro6410
      @greendro6410 3 роки тому +18

      Yep thus it became a universal language

    • @johnganggang9992
      @johnganggang9992 3 роки тому +70

      It wouldnt be if America hadn’t succeeded. It would just be like French or German

    • @crazytingz7006
      @crazytingz7006 3 роки тому +128

      @@johnganggang9992 not German, it would probably still be English or French

    • @aegoniisunfyre1460
      @aegoniisunfyre1460 3 роки тому +108

      @@johnganggang9992 nope the British made it a universal language when other countries are learning English they use British dictionaries

  • @beastmaster0934
    @beastmaster0934 3 роки тому +292

    The World: *exists*
    Britain: “It’s free real estate”

  • @Isleofskye
    @Isleofskye 3 роки тому +633

    As a Swiss National I feel disrespected and humiliated that your great Nation did not think of us as worthy to conquer :(

    • @andkerr4923
      @andkerr4923 3 роки тому +149

      No need, it's where we hid all the money.

    • @Isleofskye
      @Isleofskye 3 роки тому +37

      Tur Andy but maybe a little invasion would have been ok even just to take the watches, cuckoo-clocks, cheese, rolls and chocolate...

    • @jamesblackwell2067
      @jamesblackwell2067 3 роки тому +48

      its coz youre so annoyingly neutral - we cant think of any reason to invade; now that brexit happened, just say something bad and give us a reason :D

    • @Isleofskye
      @Isleofskye 3 роки тому +15

      Neutral is right. Brexit does not affect us as we were not in The EU so nothing changes or as my London friend says Nuffink changes...

    • @szolanek
      @szolanek 3 роки тому +2

      It was for the King of England hired Swiss mercenaries to occupy Holland. They would not occupy their own country for money.

  • @youvebeengreeked
    @youvebeengreeked 4 місяці тому +2

    This... is... *Beautiful.*

  • @RedoStone35
    @RedoStone35 4 роки тому +285

    "Irak"
    "Wassington"
    Hmm... That seems... correct...