@@john-griffin healthiest food on the planet is beef butter and bacon! New carnivore doctors say that Carbohydrates aka sugar turn into health problems
That's a great analogy! It's all about the mindset. I see so many men struggling to get there because of the loss of identify that comes with divorce. If they don't see it coming, it can hit them like a freight train. And in many cases they go through it all alone. I did too and had to reach really deep in order to overcome and get to where I am today. The work you are doing is important as it helps create awareness and a path forward.
@@john-griffin Thank you John for posting this video. I'm standing on that railway track right now and the train is approaching. Your words about the stress that lies just beneath the surface of your life every single day when in this situation are so accurate. I still can't quite believe that my best friend for over 38 years is abandoning me, but deep, deep inside I believe I will, just like you, come out the other side of this process a better, happier man. Thank you again.
Divorced @ 50 after 25 years married. Now 61 and life's better than ever. As the Buddhists say: "The root cause of all human suffering is the inability to accept things as they are." Three things to focus on that helped me: my kids, my career, and my health. If you're down, you're better off going to the gym instead of the bar. Two pieces of advice helped me: "It will get better." (from a friend). "If you have to eat something bitter, swallow it all at once." (from my lawyer). Holding on to your anger is like taking poison and expecting someone else to die. Stop the contact with your ex-wife; you don't work for her anymore.
Awesome to see Men helping other Men!! My buddy lit himself on fire on the day of his divorce settlement. He is one of 3 friends I lost to Divorce Rape. Thank you for helping men in society. Timmy C Arizona
Wow. You know, we identify so strongly with being the husband and the father that I think we forget that we still have our own identity and there is a way forward. I'm really sorry to hear about your friends. It is a very tough thing to go through, and guys aren't very comfortable with strong emotions because they can be overwhelming, and we don't want to feel out of control. Thanks for sharing!
@TimmyCramer YOUR TEXT COMPELLED ME TO MENTION AN AUTHOR ,DR. HELEN SMITH( author of Men on Strike). IN MY OPINION SUCH WOMEN ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN AND HER BOOK WAS AN AFFIRMATION OF MEN. OF COURSE THE PRETORIAN GUARD MEDIA, SAVE FOR WALL STREET JOURNAL , GAVE SHORT SHRIFT AND THE BOOK WAS IGNORED. BUT HAVING READ THE REVIEW WHEN IT APPEARED IN WSJ LEFT AN IMPRESSION ON ME. UNDERSTAND I HAVE NEVER MARRIED, NO ILLEGITAMI HAVE I , AND YET AM FULLY AWARE THAT WESTERN CIVILIZATION ITSELF HANGS IN THE BALANCE. NO LESS THAN ELON MUSK SECONDED THAT JUST RECENTLY.
@raygross1931 I feel you brother. I was a liteal mental torture chamber for the first 3 months. After the 6 month mark, I was better. After the 2nd year mark, I get fragments of that hell once in a while. After 33 years, she called it quits. Living life one day at a time, one moment at a time...
I cried quite a bit too. I.just didn't want to admit it on tape. But, I think mourning the marriage is OK, even if it wasn't what you ideally wanted. Hang in there. Life does get better! Thanks, John
I’m not divorced yet, but I would think it strange if you didn’t cry. From what I have seen from other men and myself is when we say forever we mean it. It would be no different to a death. I can’t see it would be avoided
Been there twice. I know it’s hard . But what I did I put everything into yourself by get into hobbies and get back in shape. You feel better both physically and mentally. For those men out there, everything will be better. Just move forward no matter what. Take care!
I am 2 years post-separation from my wife of 12 years. Divorce nearly concluded, still living in the same house with her and our 12 year old daughter. Has been the hardest 2 years but it is getting easier as time passes. Moving out in the spring after wife buys me out of the house. She moved on with one of our friends within a couple of months of the split. Hurt like nothing I have ever experienced. And I think the first 18 mths I was almost nurturing my resentment towards her and our 'friend'. But as time passes, I can feel myself letting go. We are getting on fairly amicably for my daughter's sake and the pain and resentment has started fading. Your videos are superb John and I agree with so much of your perspective. We have to forgive don't we. It is ONLY us that suffers when we hate and resent others. Like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick. Keep up the good work, you are saving lives
Wow, you’ve really had it rough. My ex wanted to do the separation under one roof also. I told her that if she wanted to be separated, she would need to separate. At the time of our separation our house was just a small rental property and we only had three bedrooms one for us and one for each of our daughters. So there was no way for us to actually not be sleeping in the same room. And the separation agreement required that we not be sleeping in the same bed. I refuse to lie so she had to leave. She went right back to her ex boyfriend before we got married 21 years earlier. Anyway, I can only imagine how difficult it must’ve been for you living under the same roof with your ex-wife while she’s dating a family friend for two years. You deserve a metal for not killing anyone. I’m glad you’re nearing the end of this hell. I think what you get your own place you can start developing your own lifestyle and your life will get so much better. Make sure you maintain a really powerful relationship with your daughter. You’re going to become really important to her over the next few years , especially as she becomes a teenager. Obviously her mother is preoccupied. Thanks for your comment. I really appreciate you telling your story. I wish you the very best.
It's highly likely that your ex-wife was carrying on a relationship with the family friend, before she filed for a separation. It's in women's nature to monkey branch, so they don't leave until they've already got something else going on.
@@john-griffin Do you ever wonder if your life didn't lead a double life, hooking up with her 'ex', the whole time you were married and that maybe this was part of the source of her perpetual discontent?
@@DriversOfLife They can't take ownership for their moral failings, so they blame the victim. The gynocracy carries on and about 'toxic masculinity', but the more you come to understand innate female behaviour, you see that apart from a small subset of men who are criminals, the toxicity amongst humans is all on their side, with a minority of women actually being virtuous (but still voting for the collective female hive mind).
Forgiveness after my 25 years of marriage was key for me and I'm glad you recognized that here. What I found tougher was the "forgetting" and the endless days/nights trying to make sense of it. And yes, I broke down and "cried it out" a few times. Like you, my daughter was an angel from god for me through it all...but she was not interested in forgiving her mother or even speaking to her. I think helping my daughter to understand what forgiveness really means and how important it was for her own health and well being helped me along the way and now they have a better relationship then before the divorce. Thanks for the insight John, be well.
I just found your channel here, absolutely love it. I was divorced 10 years ago. Very painful experience, your words ring true about train analogy. I got married late(46 years old) thinking we were mature enough to talk about anything. Nope. 30 months, actually fraudulent. Lost a great deal, including my daughter. I remain single + cherish my time alone. I have great friends, travel + see the world through a different lens. Blessings to you John, you are spreading an important message for men out there.🙏
@@DUNEATV same here, October 2024 marks my 2nd year...went thru mental hell for the first 3 months. I was married 33 years. My full identity was a husband and father.
@@Frank1life2live Yes, me too. I was a good man and played by the rules. Always put my wife first then kids…but she left anyway. I kept the house and my teenage daughters live with me…
Mine leaving in 3-4 weeks. Will have my three teenage daughters half the time. This video resonates a lot with me. I never would have left her, or lied to or treated her like how she treated me. She is trying to be nice and wants to remain best friends. I don’t see how anyone could do that. Working out 7 days a week, cooking and eating healthy and in best shape in 20 years. I am sad, but also excited and hopeful and my kids are too.
@@jasonbaker4120 it will take time, but you will find your way. I never wanted a divorce and was always faithful. But my wife left and crushed all of my dreams of having a family forever. I focused on myself and was always in great shape going to the gym on a regular basis. I am now dating a woman 17 years younger than me who is Head Over Heels. It feels great, but honestly, I enjoy my alone time and being single is absolutely fantastic!
It gets better guys, I promise! It has been 6 years and I am better off after the divorce. I can say the same for my son after I got full custody last year. If you are in the thick of it, hang in there! There is light at the end of the tunnel. Find happiness within.
Your comment about forgiveness is so important, but that's just my opinion. Forgiving the other person is a self-preservation tool. Holding onto anger and hurt only hurts the person with those thoughts. You have noted that believing there's a better future ahead is a key element to pulling through the sadness and difficulty of getting through a separation and divorce. It helps in many areas of life to have something to look forward to. Your advice is helping me, and thank you for that.
Thanks for your input. When I was going through it, I didn’t even have any idea where to turn for advice or understanding. I felt like I was on an island. I could see how easy it would be to allow the darkness of my emotions to overwhelm me and go down a very dark path. I knew if I didn’t take charge of it, it would beat me. I hope that this video helps other guys avoid going down that dark path. Thanks again for your input.
@@timizo691 I feel you brother. It’s hard to forgive someone who never asked for forgiveness or feels guilty about breaking up a family. I’ve dealt with it the best way I could and have moved on with my life and I’m a much better person for it
Your calm serene background is very nice as you lay out the truth. If you were still married, your wife would be back at the car, ready to talk your head off the moment you got back, and that serenity would disappear. God Bless Single People
I think you’re right. It’s really hard to forgive her. My ex slept with her old boyfriend that she was with before we met within a few weeks of leaving my house. The forgiveness is not to benefit her. The forgiveness is too relieve your state of mind from the anger and resentment That you feel. Walking around with that in your chest is toxic. It does nothing to hurt her, but it kills you. So if you want revenge, then you need to forgive her. Because if you die of a heart attack or cancer she gets the last laugh. Thanks for your input. I appreciate it.
mine put a restraining order at the condo complex we used to live in ie. if i came near, they had the right to call the cops. and i didn't do anything to deserve it.
I was against divorce. We have a kid in autistic spectre. I simply was too weak and hurt and could not acept it. And did the worse thing possible to cope. Alcohol,pills and weed. It all spiraled into psycosis/mania that lasted for a year and two months and in that period got hospitalized twice and destroyed almost every realthionship with hers and my family and friends and a bunch of random people in my hometown. We maybe had too many "friends".So in a way i made the situation hundred times worse for everyone and in the end i made my situation living hell. Alone and depressed and medicated. For anyone reading and going thru divorce dont be an idiot like me. Try to stay as calm as possible and try to acept it and try to stay sober thru divorce. Honest advice.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I hope you’re on a good track now. I think facing hard things and pushing through to what you know when your heart is right can be extremely difficult, especially when the circumstances are the way you described with a special needs child. Thanks for commenting. I really appreciate your feedback.
Glad to hear you're doing well. Lots of guys struggle with it. It's amazing how the pain stops when you stop banging your head against the wall! Thanks for you comment, John
Out of all the mens divorce recovery and motivational channels out there, your content is the most that I can relate to right now. Its not hardcore red pill material, but just fact based on raw, yet natural feelings we has human beings (men) face during divorce. For the majority of us, myself included, didnt ask for the divorce or separation. Appreciate all that you’re doing. I know things will get better. 5 months into my separation and things are already on the incline. Even though I wont get to see my child as much as I thought I would when i first became a father. Cheers.
Women don't ever take accountability for anything. DON'T ever take a Woman back after she decides to leave/divorce you. It's never the same. You never get over what she did. And most important, never marry another Woman. You will be much happier a single Man.
What the other person is, that is exactly what you get. The issue never was someone else's accountability or the lack of it, the issue is always that we must treat people _accordingly_ If they have no accountability, then they're exploring that realm, and that's ok, let them do that alone.
dude, you MUST stop talking to your ex. Be with other women more compatible with you, it is very simple. Thanks for the video! And avoid marriage at all cost, it is pernicious by nature.
you are a lucky and fortunate to have her gone. you couldn't have gotten rid of her any other way. now, what's yours is yours. and she was probably cheating. now enjoy the rest of your life and that alone will spark her. good for you.
Either you pour into yourself being single or you pour into her being married or in a relationship. Unfortunately it takes the pain and trauma to truly understand. Escape the Matrix and live your real life.
I survive a divorce by buying myself a new Harley Davidson motorcycle each time: 1979 Low Rider, a 2008 Sportster, and a 2011 Road King. I've never missed any one of them for a single second.
Not sure why your you tube was recommended to me but I watched and wow I appreciate your insight into all the issues you talk about. I have been divorced for over 10 years and wish I would have heard all the points you are sharing to help me recover. Even though your focus is on helping men, it has helped me as a woman. Hearing you describe your feelings and understanding gives me so much comfort even now so many years after. Not all women are the same thankfully. Thank you so much for sharing!
You know, I’m pretty sure the emotions are universal. We get caught up in the façade that we put on every day and sometimes we think it’s real. But each of us at our core are far more similar than we are different, regardless of our culture, our race, or even our gender. Emotional pain is the same for everyone. I’m glad you enjoyed the video.
If I don't trust someone, they will not be in my life at all no matter how much history there was before. Time on the earth is limited and spending any of it with someone I don't trust is the very definition of wasting VALUABLE time. I heard somewhere that if you were told you only had 90 days to live, how much would you spend with people you don't trust, like, or love. For me the answer is simple. ZERO! Thank you for the video.
I am going through a divorce right now after 28 years. My kids don’t talk to me and I can’t sleep and still have to work and pay alimony and child support. With a lawyer who is not doing a good job. I am on my own and is very hard. All I can do is pray.
When my wife blindsided me with a divorced I was not really surprised. What saved my sanity was the fact that I had an iron-clad prenup. Now I know what you're going to say, prenups are worthless in today's world, but that is not true. As a business owner I had mine drawn up by a retired family court judge. He gave me a strict list of things I needed to do to make sure the prenup would hold up in court and I made damn sure I followed his advice. All in all, I walked away with my kids and 90% of my assets. Today I'm retired, still single, and living a great life in the south of France.
@@yai837 As someone who had a prenup upheld in court, make sure you do 5 things: 1. Prenup should be signed at least 6 months to a year prior to the marriage, so she cannot argue that she was "pressured" into signing. 2. Make sure she has her lawyer present when she signs the prenup, and there are at least 2 other witnesses. 3. Make sure your attorneys have a background in "family court" law. 4. Make sure if you own a business prior to the marriage, it is clearly stated in the prenup that the business is 100% off the table in the event of a divorce. 5. The prenup should include wording that states each party's own banking, investment, and retirement accounts are not be designated as community property, and that any and all settlement monies can only be dispensed from joint accounts opened after the date of the marriage.
Hello John, as a younger guy (42) (single, no children) I just want to thank you for your honesty. A lot can be learned from a man like you. Keep sharing the wisdom.
Loved your video despite having never been divorced you just talk so much sense. One phrase iv always hung on to when it comes to relationships of any kind is … " when someone fucks you over believe them the first time"❤👍
I think you understand perfectly. I don’t know that the UA-cam sensors would like me to use that metaphor, but I think it’s applicable. Thanks for your input.
I just found your channel… It’s crazy because I’m going through a divorce right now. I just moved out of my house last month….. It was a custom built 4000 square-foot home sitting on 1.3 acre land we had just moved in it last year 2023…. we had been having problems for a while, but I was hoping we could fight through it and be successful always heard the first couple years of marriage are the toughest… we moved into this beautiful custom built home.… after a month in the home my wife was sleeping in the other room and we were just really roommates….the whole time we were in this brand new house we had sex twice and get this one time she apologize for having sex with me she said Her hormones got out of control…… that’s when I said that’s it. I got to get the hell out of this and now I’m going through a divorce.
I’m certain you won’t regret your decision. Just be careful to love yourself enough to carry yourself through the process. In a couple of years you’ll be able to enjoy your new life.
Why did you move out? When mine told me she wanted to leave, I told her she knew where the door was. There was no way I was going to move out because of something SHE wanted.
Although I'm a few years ahead of you, the story is pretty similar. Even the Sept. departure date (6th). You've summed up my experience pretty well. Interesting to hear it put into words so accurately. Thank you John.
Thanks for commenting, I really appreciate your input. I’m glad that this video resonated with you. I hope it helps other guys go through the transition. I’ve heard some real horror stories about guys killing themselves as they go through divorces. I know it’s pretty rough on some guys. Thanks again.
I liked your video until you said you continue to be friends. Although I disagree with that part. I like your content. I never see myself even remotely fiends with the ex. I firmly believe that when she (my ex), lied and cheated, she lost me 100%. Even if I eventually forgive her, she is a stranger that I will never want to know.
I understand exactly how you must feel. My ex went back to her boyfriend before I met her and slept with him. I was pretty furious. And hurt deeply. But that’s on her not me. Thanks for your comment. I really appreciate your input.
@@john-griffinmy ex wife waited until she finished college, which I put her through, until she ran off with another man and took my kid far away. I lost everything in an instant and it took me more than a decade to get over the hurt and build my life back even better
@@Navy35 man, my 5 year relationship came to an end on february, it was devastating for me, I cannot beilive what other people have went trough, one decade to get over it, man I take my hat off, I feel as if wearing diapers by reading this.
Very thought provoking video. Thank you. I am a widower and I am learning divorcees are to be treated very carefully. It seems the worst of a female appears when they run on emmotions. They can have a fantastic thing, but something in their head will throw it all out the window due to their subjectivity. As you pointed out, they will usually regret it
I'd never marry. We are not owners here, we are just passing through. We must acknowledge that people are in and out of our life according to THEIR desires, and not ours. _It all comes down to treating people accordingly_
I was 30 yeas old when I got divorced in 2005. From there on it was full HUMILIATION for 10 years. Child support sh1t and all. I rebelled from 30 to 40. Full reckless enjoyment. 40 to 50 sobered up and invested. Today i feel like a hero. Single and free.
My x2 dogs were the only ones I have left. Many men don't have any decisions in divorce, including their children. My wife also would complain about my dogs, the hair they loose, their barking. She not thankful the dogs accepted her into the pack (to my surprise) that they would give their lives to protect her and they were always welcoming and happy to see her. My dogs were a huge benefit to keeping me going on those dark days. (they do require work and cost) my x wife was the opposite to my dogs, besides the cost.
I been there 15 years ago it about killed me I lost my house my dog everything but my clothes on my back and everything I could put in my dads truck and move out and give myself amount to heal😊
Sometimes I think the pain comes from the resistance, not from the actual event. It’s like we don’t want to accept it until we push it away and that’s what causes the pain. But if we just accept it and move on, it’s a lot easier. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
@@lochnessmunster1189 I understand what your saying believe me... but never give up always atleast one thing to be greatful for... today has been hard for me.
If still married, you would arrive back at the car you didn’t really want but we’re forced to buy and would have to answer the following questions. Why did it take so long? What were you doing out there? Hurry up we have to be to my mothers by four.
Narcissists hoover over past victims to keep a backup supply. If she is untrustworthy, she will always be. My ex is already fighting with her new supply after a couple of months. Avoid vampires.
I learned to never burn the bridge of having friends with benefits. It took me years to realize that was even possible, and it only benefited me. You can never have too many options... I would never return to an exclusive relationship with any of them, whether they had cheated or not. There was a reason we split up, and that reason most likely would never dissolve. For any of the men here that don’t agree with the forgiveness process, they just don’t understand that it’s to benefit us, not them. These are great videos btw.
My Ex packed up and left. I don't think she regrets anything. Yes I still communicate and I don't hate her. We get on. She has another guy, I feel especially sorry for him. But love is blind. I'm with you totally in your conversation. Love nature and love my family and the Ex. But there is no turning back, she is gone. You can't put the toothpaste back in the tube. 😅🤣🤣🤣🤣. Never lose your sense of humour.
Estimado Jhon...es notable lo similar que es la vida de la gente en el mundo y sus desavenencias también. Aprecio la valentía de compartir tus experiencias tan personales, muy similar a la de muchos. Saludos desde 12 k de km.
Thanks for the video! I heard health problems stem from too many Carbohydrate intake. Carbohydrates turn into sugar in the body. Examples of carbohydrates include bread, rice, noodles
I think over consuming anything can cause your problems. What pseudoscience has gotten wrong over the last 10 years is the cause of insulin resistance. Glucose is stored as glycogen in your muscles. Muscle cells become resistant to glucose because they get coated with fat. The fat literally blocks the glucose from being absorbed into the tissues. As a result when you eat carbohydrate, your blood sugar skyrocket because the muscle cells will not absorb the sugar out of your bloodstream. This caused people to believe that sugar was the problem. The truth is the underlying problem was too much fat and saturated fat in particular. I hope that helps. Thanks for your comment.
I know your channel is primarily for men but I'm thoroughly enjoying this as an almost one year divorced (unwanted) woman with a small child. Thank you for your content. It's beautiful out there.
Thanks for sharing! I’ve been really surprised how many women have been watching. The feedback has generally been really great. I’m glad that you’re finding the content at least interesting and the setting appealing. I have to admit if I didn’t have that forest and those streams to walk-through each day I think I would’ve lost my mind. It makes such a huge difference. I’m glad more people are getting a chance to see it and I hope it’ll inspire more people to get outside and enjoy their own slice of nature more. Thanks again.
You clearly got alimony AND child support. Because you talk the same way as single men who worked 30 years for the government and have retired on a govt pension.
Yes, its called the Hover XT. It uses facial recognition and pre-planned flight plans. I noticed that DJI just came out with a similar one this year. Glad you enjoyed it.
There's something very wrong with how we've handled mating ever since Industrialization. Pair-bonding might be the best strategy under very harsh environments, but it falls apart otherwise.
Great video!! I always did fear divorce and now that it happened there is a weird sense of relief. I just always knew in the back of my mind it was coming.
That's really nice and mature of your daughter helping out in that way! Usually, daughters' side with the mother the mother usually alienate the children from the father.
Great video, A month ago, my five-year relationship came to an end. I really can't stop thinking about the love of my life, who made the decision to leave me. I've done everything in my power to win him back, but it's all in vain, and I can't imagine my life with anyone else. I genuinely miss him and just can't stop thinking about him, even though I've tried my hardest to stop thinking about him. I'm not sure why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
Hey John, I appreciate your help and your advice as it relates to my situation even though I am a 50 something female who is embarking on her next journey of life
It takes time but believe me it gets better if you let it go. It’s a disruptive change which eventually let you have a better life and make you take better decisions.
The interesting thing that arise from most of these divorces that are initiated by wives, that most of the time they are the ones who regret their decisions soon after, since they never appreciated what they had until they lost it! If you were a good husband and a father while married then start counting your blessings after such divorce.
Funny how she took everything and threw me out of her life but I've still got to pay, and pay, and pay. I'm out the door and down the road with the shirt on my back, lost everything, still waiting for the other shoe to drop, but somehow, after taking everything I've had to give for 19 years, I continue to "owe" her. There's some common core math for ya.
@@john-griffin You are absolutely correct. Saying you want to end a relationship, except for the money, is absolutely asinine on it's face. For that matter, why doesn't everyone in the world whom she's not involved with, pay her? They have no relationship, right? Me thinks it's probably because no lawyer could make that argument and get a cut of the action, and that's the only reason. PS. Thank you for putting this out there. As men, we so often have to face the "fact" that "no one cares", which isn't true. Other men care.
It's insane. If you are paying her alimony to maintain HER lifestyle, she should come to your house to clean, cook, and have s3x with you. Family law is completely one-sided.
Yes, I am in Northern Virgina. The forest here is amazing. It is an oasis in the middle of an urban / suburban sprawl. It is a stream that has been here for hundreds or thousands of years that is spring fed and runs between hills. As a result it floods often and so no one can build on it. So, it is now a network of trails and parks that create this incredible hide out for me and the dogs. It is not well known so relatively few people use it. Thanks!
I was with you all the way with the greatest admiration, and then you said you’re still helping your wife out with her emotional baggage. That’s a shame.
Did she regret the divorce years later? Did she think the grass was greener on the other side and it's not? Does she still expect you to perform husband duties even though you are no longer married anymore?
Oh yes, she still regrets it. I talked to her frequently and she has asked me to get back with her at least three times. I told her there is no way I could ever go back. But we still get along fine.
He has some good insight but he’s not holding his wife’s “happiness” as lack of accountability. Men will sacrifice their happiness for their family and women will sacrifice their family for their happiness. Judgment day will be bad for many women unfortunately
The issue for me is that I asked my wife for divorce and I feel bad and lament about my mistakes throughout the marriage. My wife is ready to move on. I am still holding on and I don't understand why? Losing her side of the family ? Maybe
Divorce? If someone killing, its just puppet of system. Every crash my relationship is freedom for me, and I wanst pity. So, divorce its the way to freedom. And after all fails in relationship, is only free. Free man is a like free horse in wilderness. Married man is a work horse on farm. Dont be a farmer horse, just stay wild Mustang.
Life provides us with challenges that we need to act on. If you feel that, chances are it's your inner voice telling you to go. I don't know you, but I know that feeling. Good Luck
Remember marriage vows: for better or for worse, for richer or poorer in sickness and health til DEATH do you part. Did she marry you in church? Anyway, marriage is not for the individual but for the couple as long as there is no abuse. People are just TO DAMM SELFISH TODAY plain and simple.
I never understood that, what is the purpose of marriage if you can walk away anytime? How is it possible that women file for divorce as if it was something ordinary, they can change their minds anytime(sure some men do as well)
Change alimony laws! I gave my wife 40 years of a retired life style. She can choose to divorce me for her personal trainer and I pay her future retirement. A woman's victim hood runs the courts. Make it make sense. Who thought this one up?
This is for guys experiencing that transition from being married to becoming single. Think of it as the entry point to life 2.0!
@@john-griffin healthiest food on the planet is beef butter and bacon! New carnivore doctors say that Carbohydrates aka sugar turn into health problems
That's a great analogy! It's all about the mindset. I see so many men struggling to get there because of the loss of identify that comes with divorce. If they don't see it coming, it can hit them like a freight train. And in many cases they go through it all alone. I did too and had to reach really deep in order to overcome and get to where I am today. The work you are doing is important as it helps create awareness and a path forward.
@@john-griffin Thank you John for posting this video. I'm standing on that railway track right now and the train is approaching. Your words about the stress that lies just beneath the surface of your life every single day when in this situation are so accurate.
I still can't quite believe that my best friend for over 38 years is abandoning me, but deep, deep inside I believe I will, just like you, come out the other side of this process a better, happier man.
Thank you again.
@@john-griffin Thanks John, I’m in the trenches right now.
Divorced @ 50 after 25 years married. Now 61 and life's better than ever.
As the Buddhists say: "The root cause of all human suffering is the inability to accept things as they are."
Three things to focus on that helped me: my kids, my career, and my health. If you're down, you're better off going to the gym instead of the bar.
Two pieces of advice helped me: "It will get better." (from a friend). "If you have to eat something bitter, swallow it all at once." (from my lawyer).
Holding on to your anger is like taking poison and expecting someone else to die.
Stop the contact with your ex-wife; you don't work for her anymore.
Awesome to see Men helping other Men!! My buddy lit himself on fire on the day of his divorce settlement. He is one of 3 friends I lost to Divorce Rape. Thank you for helping men in society. Timmy C Arizona
Wow. You know, we identify so strongly with being the husband and the father that I think we forget that we still have our own identity and there is a way forward. I'm really sorry to hear about your friends. It is a very tough thing to go through, and guys aren't very comfortable with strong emotions because they can be overwhelming, and we don't want to feel out of control. Thanks for sharing!
@@TimmyCramer I'm as so sorry to hear that.
@TimmyCramer YOUR TEXT COMPELLED ME TO MENTION AN AUTHOR ,DR. HELEN SMITH( author of Men on Strike). IN MY OPINION SUCH WOMEN ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN
AND HER BOOK WAS AN AFFIRMATION OF MEN. OF COURSE THE PRETORIAN GUARD MEDIA, SAVE FOR WALL STREET JOURNAL , GAVE SHORT SHRIFT AND THE BOOK WAS IGNORED. BUT HAVING READ THE REVIEW WHEN IT APPEARED IN WSJ LEFT AN IMPRESSION ON ME. UNDERSTAND I HAVE NEVER MARRIED, NO ILLEGITAMI HAVE I , AND YET AM FULLY AWARE THAT WESTERN CIVILIZATION ITSELF HANGS IN THE BALANCE. NO LESS THAN ELON MUSK SECONDED THAT JUST RECENTLY.
Damn. That's tough to hear. May he rest in peace.
Damn.
I am starting over at 54
After 23 years of dedication to one woman.
If I am honest, I cried everyday for over a year.
@raygross1931 I feel you brother. I was a liteal mental torture chamber for the first 3 months. After the 6 month mark, I was better. After the 2nd year mark, I get fragments of that hell once in a while. After 33 years, she called it quits. Living life one day at a time, one moment at a time...
I cried quite a bit too. I.just didn't want to admit it on tape. But, I think mourning the marriage is OK, even if it wasn't what you ideally wanted. Hang in there. Life does get better! Thanks, John
I’m not divorced yet, but I would think it strange if you didn’t cry. From what I have seen from other men and myself is when we say forever we mean it. It would be no different to a death. I can’t see it would be avoided
It is true mourning gentlemen... most men that have loved have been there
I know that pain.
Been there twice. I know it’s hard . But what I did I put everything into yourself by get into hobbies and get back in shape. You feel better both physically and mentally. For those men out there, everything will be better. Just move forward no matter what. Take care!
I am 2 years post-separation from my wife of 12 years. Divorce nearly concluded, still living in the same house with her and our 12 year old daughter. Has been the hardest 2 years but it is getting easier as time passes. Moving out in the spring after wife buys me out of the house. She moved on with one of our friends within a couple of months of the split. Hurt like nothing I have ever experienced. And I think the first 18 mths I was almost nurturing my resentment towards her and our 'friend'. But as time passes, I can feel myself letting go. We are getting on fairly amicably for my daughter's sake and the pain and resentment has started fading.
Your videos are superb John and I agree with so much of your perspective. We have to forgive don't we. It is ONLY us that suffers when we hate and resent others. Like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick. Keep up the good work, you are saving lives
Wow, you’ve really had it rough. My ex wanted to do the separation under one roof also. I told her that if she wanted to be separated, she would need to separate. At the time of our separation our house was just a small rental property and we only had three bedrooms one for us and one for each of our daughters. So there was no way for us to actually not be sleeping in the same room. And the separation agreement required that we not be sleeping in the same bed. I refuse to lie so she had to leave. She went right back to her ex boyfriend before we got married 21 years earlier.
Anyway, I can only imagine how difficult it must’ve been for you living under the same roof with your ex-wife while she’s dating a family friend for two years. You deserve a metal for not killing anyone. I’m glad you’re nearing the end of this hell. I think what you get your own place you can start developing your own lifestyle and your life will get so much better. Make sure you maintain a really powerful relationship with your daughter. You’re going to become really important to her over the next few years , especially as she becomes a teenager. Obviously her mother is preoccupied. Thanks for your comment. I really appreciate you telling your story. I wish you the very best.
It's highly likely that your ex-wife was carrying on a relationship with the family friend, before she filed for a separation. It's in women's nature to monkey branch, so they don't leave until they've already got something else going on.
@@john-griffin Do you ever wonder if your life didn't lead a double life, hooking up with her 'ex', the whole time you were married and that maybe this was part of the source of her perpetual discontent?
@@dleetri wonder this too! In my estimation the women say they are not happy but they are itching to run to another man
@@DriversOfLife They can't take ownership for their moral failings, so they blame the victim. The gynocracy carries on and about 'toxic masculinity', but the more you come to understand innate female behaviour, you see that apart from a small subset of men who are criminals, the toxicity amongst humans is all on their side, with a minority of women actually being virtuous (but still voting for the collective female hive mind).
Forgiveness after my 25 years of marriage was key for me and I'm glad you recognized that here. What I found tougher was the "forgetting" and the endless days/nights trying to make sense of it. And yes, I broke down and "cried it out" a few times. Like you, my daughter was an angel from god for me through it all...but she was not interested in forgiving her mother or even speaking to her. I think helping my daughter to understand what forgiveness really means and how important it was for her own health and well being helped me along the way and now they have a better relationship then before the divorce.
Thanks for the insight John, be well.
Thanks for sharing your story. It sounds very similar to my own.
The only thing that heals is time. Staying busy helps the time to pass. I went to bed exhausted for almost 2 years. Doing is a man's best medicine
100% work on yourself. Home, career, build
I just found your channel here, absolutely love it. I was divorced 10 years ago. Very painful experience, your words ring true about train analogy. I got married late(46 years old) thinking we were mature enough to talk about anything. Nope. 30 months, actually fraudulent. Lost a great deal, including my daughter. I remain single + cherish my time alone. I have great friends, travel + see the world through a different lens. Blessings to you John, you are spreading an important message for men out there.🙏
Thanks. I really appreciate that!
Our situation was almost identical…January will be my two year mark being single. The healing takes time!
Yeah, you really can’t rush it . Thanks
@@DUNEATV same here, October 2024 marks my 2nd year...went thru mental hell for the first 3 months. I was married 33 years. My full identity was a husband and father.
@@Frank1life2live Yes, me too. I was a good man and played by the rules. Always put my wife first then kids…but she left anyway. I kept the house and my teenage daughters live with me…
Mine leaving in 3-4 weeks. Will have my three teenage daughters half the time. This video resonates a lot with me. I never would have left her, or lied to or treated her like how she treated me. She is trying to be nice and wants to remain best friends. I don’t see how anyone could do that.
Working out 7 days a week, cooking and eating healthy and in best shape in 20 years. I am sad, but also excited and hopeful and my kids are too.
@@jasonbaker4120 it will take time, but you will find your way. I never wanted a divorce and was always faithful. But my wife left and crushed all of my dreams of having a family forever. I focused on myself and was always in great shape going to the gym on a regular basis. I am now dating a woman 17 years younger than me who is Head Over Heels. It feels great, but honestly, I enjoy my alone time and being single is absolutely fantastic!
When you set someone free you are also freeing yourself.
It gets better guys, I promise! It has been 6 years and I am better off after the divorce. I can say the same for my son after I got full custody last year.
If you are in the thick of it, hang in there! There is light at the end of the tunnel. Find happiness within.
Your comment about forgiveness is so important, but that's just my opinion. Forgiving the other person is a self-preservation tool. Holding onto anger and hurt only hurts the person with those thoughts. You have noted that believing there's a better future ahead is a key element to pulling through the sadness and difficulty of getting through a separation and divorce. It helps in many areas of life to have something to look forward to. Your advice is helping me, and thank you for that.
Thanks for your input. When I was going through it, I didn’t even have any idea where to turn for advice or understanding. I felt like I was on an island. I could see how easy it would be to allow the darkness of my emotions to overwhelm me and go down a very dark path. I knew if I didn’t take charge of it, it would beat me. I hope that this video helps other guys avoid going down that dark path. Thanks again for your input.
I just don’t think I can ever forgive my ex for what she did to me and my son. Indifference is the best I think I will ever achieve.
@@timizo691 Indifference is my strategy also after 5 years from divorce.
@@AleksandarŽivković-c5g how close have you gotten? I’m almost exactly 2 years out and still struggling. The anger and rage is still strong.
@@timizo691 I feel you brother. It’s hard to forgive someone who never asked for forgiveness or feels guilty about breaking up a family. I’ve dealt with it the best way I could and have moved on with my life and I’m a much better person for it
Your calm serene background is very nice as you lay out the truth. If you were still married, your wife would be back at the car, ready to talk your head off the moment you got back, and that serenity would disappear. God Bless Single People
You know it. the forest is great. It really helps me think. Thanks!
The only chirping heard is from birds and crickets!
My ex wife made false domestic violence accusations during divorce proceedings. It makes it very difficult for me to want to forgive her.
I think you’re right. It’s really hard to forgive her. My ex slept with her old boyfriend that she was with before we met within a few weeks of leaving my house. The forgiveness is not to benefit her. The forgiveness is too relieve your state of mind from the anger and resentment That you feel. Walking around with that in your chest is toxic. It does nothing to hurt her, but it kills you. So if you want revenge, then you need to forgive her. Because if you die of a heart attack or cancer she gets the last laugh. Thanks for your input. I appreciate it.
mine put a restraining order at the condo complex we used to live in ie. if i came near, they had the right to call the cops. and i didn't do anything to deserve it.
Don’t forget her betrayal, but forgive her for your own peace.
I was against divorce. We have a kid in autistic spectre. I simply was too weak and hurt and could not acept it. And did the worse thing possible to cope. Alcohol,pills and weed. It all spiraled into psycosis/mania that lasted for a year and two months and in that period got hospitalized twice and destroyed almost every realthionship with hers and my family and friends and a bunch of random people in my hometown. We maybe had too many "friends".So in a way i made the situation hundred times worse for everyone and in the end i made my situation living hell. Alone and depressed and medicated. For anyone reading and going thru divorce dont be an idiot like me. Try to stay as calm as possible and try to acept it and try to stay sober thru divorce. Honest advice.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I hope you’re on a good track now. I think facing hard things and pushing through to what you know when your heart is right can be extremely difficult, especially when the circumstances are the way you described with a special needs child. Thanks for commenting. I really appreciate your feedback.
My marriage was bad for over 20 years. So this divorce is not that painful. I am excited about the next stage of my life
Glad to hear you're doing well. Lots of guys struggle with it. It's amazing how the pain stops when you stop banging your head against the wall!
Thanks for you comment, John
For God's Sake DONT marry again my friend.
So pleased to have come across your channel. I am a year divorced and I found your comments inspiring. Blessings from the UK 🙏.
Welcome!! Thanks!
Out of all the mens divorce recovery and motivational channels out there, your content is the most that I can relate to right now. Its not hardcore red pill material, but just fact based on raw, yet natural feelings we has human beings (men) face during divorce. For the majority of us, myself included, didnt ask for the divorce or separation. Appreciate all that you’re doing. I know things will get better. 5 months into my separation and things are already on the incline. Even though I wont get to see my child as much as I thought I would when i first became a father. Cheers.
Women don't ever take accountability for anything. DON'T ever take a Woman back after she decides to leave/divorce you. It's never the same. You never get over what she did. And most important, never marry another Woman. You will be much happier a single Man.
What the other person is, that is exactly what you get.
The issue never was someone else's accountability or the lack of it, the issue is always that we must treat people _accordingly_
If they have no accountability, then they're exploring that realm, and that's ok, let them do that alone.
dude, you MUST stop talking to your ex. Be with other women more compatible with you, it is very simple. Thanks for the video! And avoid marriage at all cost, it is pernicious by nature.
Thanks for the view. Unfortunately she is the mother of my kids, so I have to deal with her. Thanks again for the advice.
I just found this channel and I'm addicted, he speaks a lot of what I have been thinking.... keep up the good work
Thanks so much!
you are a lucky and fortunate to have her gone. you couldn't have gotten rid of her any other way. now, what's yours is yours. and she was probably cheating. now enjoy the rest of your life and that alone will spark her. good for you.
You are soooo right! Thanks!
Either you pour into yourself being single or you pour into her being married or in a relationship. Unfortunately it takes the pain and trauma to truly understand. Escape the Matrix and live your real life.
I survive a divorce by buying myself a new Harley Davidson motorcycle each time: 1979 Low Rider, a 2008 Sportster, and a 2011 Road King. I've never missed any one of them for a single second.
Not sure why your you tube was recommended to me but I watched and wow I appreciate your insight into all the issues you talk about. I have been divorced for over 10 years and wish I would have heard all the points you are sharing to help me recover. Even though your focus is on helping men, it has helped me as a woman. Hearing you describe your feelings and understanding gives me so much comfort even now so many years after. Not all women are the same thankfully. Thank you so much for sharing!
You know, I’m pretty sure the emotions are universal. We get caught up in the façade that we put on every day and sometimes we think it’s real. But each of us at our core are far more similar than we are different, regardless of our culture, our race, or even our gender. Emotional pain is the same for everyone. I’m glad you enjoyed the video.
If I don't trust someone, they will not be in my life at all no matter how much history there was before. Time on the earth is limited and spending any of it with someone I don't trust is the very definition of wasting VALUABLE time. I heard somewhere that if you were told you only had 90 days to live, how much would you spend with people you don't trust, like, or love. For me the answer is simple. ZERO! Thank you for the video.
I am going through a divorce right now after 28 years. My kids don’t talk to me and I can’t sleep and still have to work and pay alimony and child support. With a lawyer who is not doing a good job. I am on my own and is very hard. All I can do is pray.
When my wife blindsided me with a divorced I was not really surprised. What saved my sanity was the fact that I had an iron-clad prenup. Now I know what you're going to say, prenups are worthless in today's world, but that is not true. As a business owner I had mine drawn up by a retired family court judge. He gave me a strict list of things I needed to do to make sure the prenup would hold up in court and I made damn sure I followed his advice. All in all, I walked away with my kids and 90% of my assets. Today I'm retired, still single, and living a great life in the south of France.
Could you share your knowledge sir? How was the layout?
@@yai837 As someone who had a prenup upheld in court, make sure you do 5 things: 1. Prenup should be signed at least 6 months to a year prior to the marriage, so she cannot argue that she was "pressured" into signing. 2. Make sure she has her lawyer present when she signs the prenup, and there are at least 2 other witnesses. 3. Make sure your attorneys have a background in "family court" law. 4. Make sure if you own a business prior to the marriage, it is clearly stated in the prenup that the business is 100% off the table in the event of a divorce. 5. The prenup should include wording that states each party's own banking, investment, and retirement accounts are not be designated as community property, and that any and all settlement monies can only be dispensed from joint accounts opened after the date of the marriage.
Hello John, as a younger guy (42) (single, no children)
I just want to thank you for your honesty. A lot can be learned from a man like you.
Keep sharing the wisdom.
I appreciate that, thank you
Loved your video despite having never been divorced you just talk so much sense. One phrase iv always hung on to when it comes to relationships of any kind is … " when someone fucks you over believe them the first time"❤👍
I think you understand perfectly. I don’t know that the UA-cam sensors would like me to use that metaphor, but I think it’s applicable. Thanks for your input.
A man will forgive his happiness for his family, a woman will forgive her family for her happiness.
Well said
They are never happy.
Great Vido John. Beautiful scenery and great advice!
I just found your channel… It’s crazy because I’m going through a divorce right now. I just moved out of my house last month….. It was a custom built 4000 square-foot home sitting on 1.3 acre land we had just moved in it last year 2023…. we had been having problems for a while, but I was hoping we could fight through it and be successful always heard the first couple years of marriage are the toughest… we moved into this beautiful custom built home.… after a month in the home my wife was sleeping in the other room and we were just really roommates….the whole time we were in this brand new house we had sex twice and get this one time she apologize for having sex with me she said Her hormones got out of control…… that’s when I said that’s it. I got to get the hell out of this and now I’m going through a divorce.
I’m sure you will find that life gets better when you get through this! Good luck
Thank you
I’m certain you won’t regret your decision. Just be careful to love yourself enough to carry yourself through the process. In a couple of years you’ll be able to enjoy your new life.
Thanks I appreciate it 👊🏾
Why did you move out? When mine told me she wanted to leave, I told her she knew where the door was. There was no way I was going to move out because of something SHE wanted.
I’m 55 and doing this right now three months in. The mind games for the last two years were incredible then she just left
Although I'm a few years ahead of you, the story is pretty similar. Even the Sept. departure date (6th). You've summed up my experience pretty well. Interesting to hear it put into words so accurately. Thank you John.
Thanks for commenting, I really appreciate your input. I’m glad that this video resonated with you. I hope it helps other guys go through the transition. I’ve heard some real horror stories about guys killing themselves as they go through divorces. I know it’s pretty rough on some guys. Thanks again.
I am not angry at my wife. We were just incompatible even when we were dating .
I liked your video until you said you continue to be friends. Although I disagree with that part. I like your content. I never see myself even remotely fiends with the ex. I firmly believe that when she (my ex), lied and cheated, she lost me 100%. Even if I eventually forgive her, she is a stranger that I will never want to know.
I understand exactly how you must feel. My ex went back to her boyfriend before I met her and slept with him. I was pretty furious. And hurt deeply. But that’s on her not me. Thanks for your comment. I really appreciate your input.
@@john-griffinmy ex wife waited until she finished college, which I put her through, until she ran off with another man and took my kid far away. I lost everything in an instant and it took me more than a decade to get over the hurt and build my life back even better
@@Navy35 man, my 5 year relationship came to an end on february, it was devastating for me, I cannot beilive what other people have went trough, one decade to get over it, man I take my hat off, I feel as if wearing diapers by reading this.
Very thought provoking video. Thank you. I am a widower and I am learning divorcees are to be treated very carefully. It seems the worst of a female appears when they run on emmotions. They can have a fantastic thing, but something in their head will throw it all out the window due to their subjectivity. As you pointed out, they will usually regret it
Well said!
I'd never marry.
We are not owners here, we are just passing through.
We must acknowledge that people are in and out of our life according to THEIR desires, and not ours.
_It all comes down to treating people accordingly_
I was 30 yeas old when I got divorced in 2005. From there on it was full HUMILIATION for 10 years. Child support sh1t and all. I rebelled from 30 to 40. Full reckless enjoyment. 40 to 50 sobered up and invested. Today i feel like a hero. Single and free.
Freedom is really the best medicine for what ails you! Thanks for the comment, John
My x2 dogs were the only ones I have left. Many men don't have any decisions in divorce, including their children. My wife also would complain about my dogs, the hair they loose, their barking. She not thankful the dogs accepted her into the pack (to my surprise) that they would give their lives to protect her and they were always welcoming and happy to see her. My dogs were a huge benefit to keeping me going on those dark days. (they do require work and cost) my x wife was the opposite to my dogs, besides the cost.
You and I may have been married to the same person
I been there 15 years ago it about killed me
I lost my house my dog everything but my clothes on my back and everything I could put in my dads truck and move out and give myself amount to heal😊
It is a hard road, but one worth walking for your freedom!
Going through this now. It was tough at first, but once I stopped trying to fight it and accepted it, things got way better.
Sometimes I think the pain comes from the resistance, not from the actual event. It’s like we don’t want to accept it until we push it away and that’s what causes the pain. But if we just accept it and move on, it’s a lot easier. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
This part of life is when you learn the basic needs of life and most importantly your relationship with our Creator.
I tried that, but this creator doesn't respond.
@@lochnessmunster1189 I understand what your saying believe me... but never give up always atleast one thing to be greatful for... today has been hard for me.
If still married, you would arrive back at the car you didn’t really want but we’re forced to buy and would have to answer the following questions. Why did it take so long? What were you doing out there? Hurry up we have to be to my mothers by four.
Don't help her with her problems. Be not her backup-plan. Her problems are no longer your problems.
Thanks
Narcissists hoover over past victims to keep a backup supply. If she is untrustworthy, she will always be.
My ex is already fighting with her new supply after a couple of months. Avoid vampires.
I learned to never burn the bridge of having friends with benefits. It took me years to realize that was even possible, and it only benefited me. You can never have too many options... I would never return to an exclusive relationship with any of them, whether they had cheated or not. There was a reason we split up, and that reason most likely would never dissolve. For any of the men here that don’t agree with the forgiveness process, they just don’t understand that it’s to benefit us, not them. These are great videos btw.
Great Video! Beautiful scenery and good advice. Thanks
Thanks. glad you liked it
I’m in the D boat now Thank you John for helping me and all other to sail through out of this . We are destined to make it happen again soon
I thoroughly relate to, and pretty much agree with every point that you make John. Thank you for sharing good sir! 👊💪
Thanks, I just don’t think many guys talk about this stuff out loud. I think it’s time. Thanks for your input.
My Ex packed up and left. I don't think she regrets anything. Yes I still communicate and I don't hate her. We get on. She has another guy, I feel especially sorry for him. But love is blind. I'm with you totally in your conversation. Love nature and love my family and the Ex. But there is no turning back, she is gone. You can't put the toothpaste back in the tube. 😅🤣🤣🤣🤣.
Never lose your sense of humour.
Another great segment John! Truth and wisdom. 🙏
Thanks! This video is more focused but at the same time I think it’s more meaningful. I hope you guys find it useful.
@@john-griffin wish I had that video for my divorce 14 years ago. Absolutely useful. Love the dogs too! 😉 They give unconditional love.
@@mariocouture1596 Thanks! The dogs are really the stars of the show. Them and the forest!
Estimado Jhon...es notable lo similar que es la vida de la gente en el mundo y sus desavenencias también. Aprecio la valentía de compartir tus experiencias tan personales, muy similar a la de muchos. Saludos desde 12 k de km.
Thanks very much for your comment! Gracias
Thanks for the video! I heard health problems stem from too many Carbohydrate intake. Carbohydrates turn into sugar in the body. Examples of carbohydrates include bread, rice, noodles
I think over consuming anything can cause your problems. What pseudoscience has gotten wrong over the last 10 years is the cause of insulin resistance. Glucose is stored as glycogen in your muscles. Muscle cells become resistant to glucose because they get coated with fat. The fat literally blocks the glucose from being absorbed into the tissues. As a result when you eat carbohydrate, your blood sugar skyrocket because the muscle cells will not absorb the sugar out of your bloodstream. This caused people to believe that sugar was the problem. The truth is the underlying problem was too much fat and saturated fat in particular. I hope that helps. Thanks for your comment.
Excellent channel...
Thanks!
Thanks brothers
I’m glad we have each other back brothers
I know your channel is primarily for men but I'm thoroughly enjoying this as an almost one year divorced (unwanted) woman with a small child. Thank you for your content. It's beautiful out there.
Thanks for sharing! I’ve been really surprised how many women have been watching. The feedback has generally been really great. I’m glad that you’re finding the content at least interesting and the setting appealing. I have to admit if I didn’t have that forest and those streams to walk-through each day I think I would’ve lost my mind. It makes such a huge difference. I’m glad more people are getting a chance to see it and I hope it’ll inspire more people to get outside and enjoy their own slice of nature more. Thanks again.
You clearly got alimony AND child support. Because you talk the same way as single men who worked 30 years for the government and have retired on a govt pension.
@@andre1987eph You got all that from my comment?
How do you film this? Is it a drone?
Yes, its called the Hover XT. It uses facial recognition and pre-planned flight plans. I noticed that DJI just came out with a similar one this year. Glad you enjoyed it.
Mine was easy. Best decision i ever made. Much happier now with a much better woman.
How to Survive a Divorce ..... easy ... Never Get Married...
Agreed 👊🏾
There's something very wrong with how we've handled mating ever since Industrialization. Pair-bonding might be the best strategy under very harsh environments, but it falls apart otherwise.
You’re so right! There has to be a better way!
Great video!! I always did fear divorce and now that it happened there is a weird sense of relief. I just always knew in the back of my mind it was coming.
It is like being reborn into your old self. Like coming home!
Good choice DO NOT TAKE HER BACK. Heck, I wouldn't even help her she really doesn't care about you she only care's what you can DO for her.
This is exactly right. It's your utility they love, not you.
That's really nice and mature of your daughter helping out in that way! Usually, daughters' side with the mother the mother usually alienate the children from the father.
Another great video John.
Thanks
Fantastic video! Greetings from Sweden!
Thanks for your comment. I’m glad to get your input. Did the Swedes have the same problems that we Americans have with marriage?
@@john-griffin I am not Swedish but I think Swedes are very similar to US in this regard.
Thank you so much! Your videos are right on and very comforting. 🙏
Glad you like them! Thanks for your comments. I really appreciate the feedback!
Great video and fantastic points ! Stay strong!
Thanks!
I’m enjoying your channel, really appreciate you being open to sharing 💯 Please keep making more videos 🙏❤️
Thank you, I will
Thank you for this. So very needed in my life right now. Again, thank you.
I had people like you in mind when I made it. I'm glad it found you.
Great video, A month ago, my five-year relationship came to an end. I really can't stop thinking about the love of my life, who made the decision to leave me. I've done everything in my power to win him back, but it's all in vain, and I can't imagine my life with anyone else. I genuinely miss him and just can't stop thinking about him, even though I've tried my hardest to stop thinking about him. I'm not sure why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
Thank you for sharing.
Hey John, I appreciate your help and your advice as it relates to my situation even though I am a 50 something female who is embarking on her next journey of life
I’m really glad you enjoyed the video. We all have the same needs. Independence and freedom to live our lives as we wish. Thanks
thank you
I have to admit that this video really made an impact in me, and made me a better person. Thanks, a lot
Glad to hear it, thanks
Easy...... DON'T GET MARRIED
It takes time but believe me it gets better if you let it go. It’s a disruptive change which eventually let you have a better life and make you take better decisions.
It does get better! Thanks, John
Thank you for putting it in words ❤
You're welcome 😊
The interesting thing that arise from most of these divorces that are initiated by wives, that most of the time they are the ones who regret their decisions soon after, since they never appreciated what they had until they lost it! If you were a good husband and a father while married then start counting your blessings after such divorce.
Funny how she took everything and threw me out of her life but I've still got to pay, and pay, and pay.
I'm out the door and down the road with the shirt on my back, lost everything, still waiting for the other shoe to drop, but somehow, after taking everything I've had to give for 19 years, I continue to "owe" her.
There's some common core math for ya.
The laws are out of date and need to be changed. Alimony is ridiculous!
@@john-griffin You are absolutely correct.
Saying you want to end a relationship, except for the money, is absolutely asinine on it's face.
For that matter, why doesn't everyone in the world whom she's not involved with, pay her?
They have no relationship, right?
Me thinks it's probably because no lawyer could make that argument and get a cut of the action, and that's the only reason.
PS. Thank you for putting this out there. As men, we so often have to face the "fact" that "no one cares", which isn't true.
Other men care.
It's insane. If you are paying her alimony to maintain HER lifestyle, she should come to your house to clean, cook, and have s3x with you. Family law is completely one-sided.
Im completely lost. I use alcohol just to get by and it sucks
In which state are you taking these beautiful walks? I'm guessing you're on the east coast?
Yes, I am in Northern Virgina. The forest here is amazing. It is an oasis in the middle of an urban / suburban sprawl. It is a stream that has been here for hundreds or thousands of years that is spring fed and runs between hills. As a result it floods often and so no one can build on it. So, it is now a network of trails and parks that create this incredible hide out for me and the dogs. It is not well known so relatively few people use it. Thanks!
So grateful I never married 😅. Hope my cat never leaves me.
Me neither. I wish our futrry friends lived longer!
Unforgiveness keeps you in a place that God never intended you to be.
Powerful.
Thanks!
You gotta change the parameters of a relationship based on behaviour
Sh*t happens, or shift happens. A bonus that you came out of it with good kids.
I was with you all the way with the greatest admiration, and then you said you’re still helping your wife out with her emotional baggage. That’s a shame.
Did she regret the divorce years later? Did she think the grass was greener on the other side and it's not? Does she still expect you to perform husband duties even though you are no longer married anymore?
Oh yes, she still regrets it. I talked to her frequently and she has asked me to get back with her at least three times. I told her there is no way I could ever go back. But we still get along fine.
He has some good insight but he’s not holding his wife’s “happiness” as lack of accountability. Men will sacrifice their happiness for their family and women will sacrifice their family for their happiness. Judgment day will be bad for many women unfortunately
"I quit my job and my wife left me." Yup. sadly.
What’s funny is my wife left me shortly after I quit my job also, but she quit many jobs during our marriage, and I never left her not once
@@john-griffin That's how they do it. You are doing great though. love the channel. acceptance is key!
Thanks
The issue for me is that I asked my wife for divorce and I feel bad and lament about my mistakes throughout the marriage. My wife is ready to move on. I am still holding on and I don't understand why? Losing her side of the family ? Maybe
Divorce? If someone killing, its just puppet of system. Every crash my relationship is freedom for me, and I wanst pity. So, divorce its the way to freedom. And after all fails in relationship, is only free. Free man is a like free horse in wilderness. Married man is a work horse on farm. Dont be a farmer horse, just stay wild Mustang.
"Save the man, not the marriage." - George Bruno
Sadly, I know in the deepest part of me, if I stay with my wife I will die prematurely.
Life provides us with challenges that we need to act on. If you feel that, chances are it's your inner voice telling you to go. I don't know you, but I know that feeling. Good Luck
I’m pretty sure she watches these videos and regrets every moment 🤣
Remember marriage vows: for better or for worse, for richer or poorer in sickness and health til DEATH do you part. Did she marry you in church? Anyway, marriage is not for the individual but for the couple as long as there is no abuse. People are just TO DAMM SELFISH TODAY plain and simple.
I never understood that, what is the purpose of marriage if you can walk away anytime? How is it possible that women file for divorce as if it was something ordinary, they can change their minds anytime(sure some men do as well)
I agree with that last statement. Selfishness is at the core of most of our social problems.
Poor John
Again? Another poor John? At least you’re persistent and consistent.
Change alimony laws!
I gave my wife 40 years of a retired life style. She can choose to divorce me for her personal trainer and I pay her future retirement. A woman's victim hood runs the courts. Make it make sense. Who thought this one up?
At year 38 you would have said, "mine is not like the others, we've been going strong for 38 years!" 😢