I'm 40 and having an early menopause and this is exactly how I'm feeling. It's making my relationship really difficult and upsetting and causing arguments. I feel totally detached and uninterested in sex .
I find its more of a mental thing also. I am very anxious and sweaty and I don’t even want to sleep in the same bed because its too hot. It can ruin your marriage and it might. It sucks but, I have zero desire to be touched by a man or woman. Yeah just leave me alone sounds so good.
You are amazing I am so glad I have discovered you. You are bringing me out of the dark miserable black hole I’ve been in for too long. I suffered for years with PMT I refuse to suffer again with menopause, I’m going to smack it in the face lol and learn to love me whatever, know it’s a phase and to work with my beautiful body and treat it as a friend not my enemy. Good luck to everyone in the same boat sending love peace and light ❤️❤️
I have no desire at all. I lost it at 50yrs old after a hysterectomy, and the thought of sex is actually sickens me. I was very sexual in my younger years. I now am dead inside...
I'm so thankful to be single at this time in my life. I have lost all desire and I LOVE it! I feel less distracted and feel I can focus on other passions of mine. It feels like MY TIME. It feels liberating and powerful. When a man approaches me I love thinking.....that I am unattainable, haha. No thanks....Mister.....had enough of relationships and sex was often draining and something I felt I had to do. This is the 3rd time I missed a period in 2 years and it feels so GOOD when my periods are gone. I'm so excited to get my LAST one forever.
It's a great advice again and you explain very well. I'm 49 years and my husband is very understanding whenever I refuse to make love sometimes. But we enjoy using Felina lubricant for dryness and it makes us satisfied. Prayers and acceptance is very important to fight stress,anxiety and depression during menopause stage. Thank you so much Eileen for continue sharing your knowledge to enlighten and comfort to all menopause women.😊😇
It's 8:23am Christmas Eve and I'm bringing on your videos and I have heard things that made a light bulb go on. I was scratching, the anxiety, etc. I'm 54 and didn't know my digestion was going haywire because of menopause ☹️. It's so much and the sad part is all of this stuff on social media with young women, with the bodies they ADMIRE and want so bad, they ALL have no idea of what's coming down the pipe line when everything starts to change. Happy Holidays Ladies🌈🌈🌈we who have kind, loving, positive hearts and minds are awesome 👍⭐💖💯
This post is right on time. Thank you so much for these suggestions and encouragement. I am thinking my estrogen has gotten way too low. I have tried maca but it increased my appetite. It was nuts.
Tribulus ( herb) made my libido shoot through the roof, try 1/4 tsp 3x daily, adjust dosing as u need. This herb is not only good for hormonal balance, it’s good for kidneys ( in TCM organ of sexual energy and feminine essence), a gentle diuretic ( much extra weight is actually water retention) , helps you feeling juicy again 🥰
Thanks Eileen - once again you're there with invaluable comfort and advice - especially with this issue which is the one thing I've found particularly hard to come to terms with. You're dead right that no.1 is to keep talking to your partner..I would even say that it should be added as an 11th Golden rule from your blog last week...it's very easy for us women to get so focussed on ourselves and our mad bodies that we forget they're living through this 'change' too...
Thank u doc... This help me a lot coping and understanding my situation and yet im right of doing as i talk to my husband All your vlogs helps a lot to us women who are in menopause phase of life God bless and more power
Ijust talked to my hubby....He looked at me in a :::::YEAH OKAY::::::: sort of way....and I hope he isnt cofused or anything.....But I will admit....my level hasnt completely disappeared and I tend to use it as soon as possible....after all he is waiting.....The ball is in my court and I should think of his needs also...MENOPAUSE...cant live with it and cant live without it !!!!!!!!!!!
As a Man I was never educated about this. My Wife literally turned into another person right in front of me. She was never actually a sexual person. Today she is like a total stranger to me and she left in Feb this year. This pain is horrible to deal with especially missing my Family together. She has zero desire for intimacy and the rejection over the years had me looking outside of our covenant. That made things even more worse than ever. At this point MY PEACE of mind is more important than a relationship if things stay this way it's impossible to be with her. Our babies are the only true casualties to the court system she put me in even with me still being there for her every way possible. I exhausted with every option I have tried and it's still the same zero effort from her. I guess it took me 10yrs to notice she was kind of always in her own world but now it's a dictatorship.
I've been married to my wife over 38 years, she has been going through menopause for the last 5 years, our sex life has depreciated to almost zero, it's sometimes weeks, if not months where we have no sexual contact. I've tried talking to her about our sexual situation, but she gets all hyped up into a frenzy, and becomes very aggressive, so much that she basically flies off the handle, then she shuts down, and refuses to talk to me for sometimes days at a time. Now, we are at a point that we basically live together, but have actually lost our once binding closeness that we once had. I'm overwhelming frustrated, and have no solutions. I've suggested even going together for marriage counseling, or even talking together to her gynecologist, that really makes her lose it. So, what to do? Does anyone out there have any kind of advice, that could bring back the woman that I love?
What a lucky lady to have such an understanding husband! Be patient and show kindness and love, hold her hand etc. She is going through such a tough time and it’s so out of her control. Carry on being a loving husband, she’s very lucky and I’m sure you’ll get your loving wife back soon. Good luck to you both!
Divorce and get a younger partner, or get a girlfriend. Its never going to be how it was with her, and most men can't deal with that. It's how we are wired..we need physical connectivity. Truth.
I feel your pain. I've been married to my wife for 36 yrs and your situation sounds exactly like mine.... I can't seen to leave the women I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with when I layed on her, but I can say I'm not happy in my marriage because of the menopause but I'm taking it one day at a time and it has driven me to counseling by myself just to try to make sense of it all. Hang in there
Thanx alot I've learned alot from u...I m not interested in sex anymore and I dnt have any feelings towards it anymore and it's really affecting my marriage...I dnt know how to explain it to my loving husband..
Yes, you are totally right. All of these various symptoms I discuss on this channel only happen in some women, not all! And menopause symptoms vary hugely across the board.
Hi Leanne You could investigate the herb Maca but this would need to be taken under the guidance of your consultant. It is known to be hormone balancing although it is not known to be oestrogenic as such Best Wishes Eileen
I just don't want to do it because of how I'm feeling with the perimenopause.... not interested at all...my husband sorts of understands but every so often he will say how about it, unfortunately i just dont want to... will this feeling ever change? Thank you as always...yes its the guilt...
Hi Jammyjay For most women, this is a phase that eases over time but it can depend on a lot of factors such as fatigue, vaginal dryness, mood, stress etc. Some women find that organising a proper date night every so often can help as anticipation can be a good aphrodisiac! Best Wishes Eileen
I'm all of the above,don't feel like doing anything NOTHING can't stand my husband ,lol uuuugh can not get nothing done anymore . What do you think about taking the over the counter stuff ?
Tammy Stegall I want a separation I think its best at this point. I am sick and he doesn’t get it and we have a damn quarantine......what a bad joke on us ladies and my husband retired! Someone come save me please LOl 😂
I still ovulate, so I still have lubricant…but, I also have a very moderate desensitization, and vulvar atrophy…I had been experiencing a fair bit of grief, and I I can tell my hormones have lowered. My periods are getting irregular, but currently still able to have some sort of sex life. I’ve been through the gamut of emotions over the past 10 years, and now I’m less labile. Is vaginal atrophy, and loss of moisture a for sure thing?
Hi Patricia, to some extent it is part of menopause and ageing but a healthy diet and lifestyle can also make a huge difference so it doesn't have to be a sure thing and many women enjoy great sex well past menopause!
What if your partner is not open to pilates, exercise, changing eating habits and being more participating in intimacy after breast cancer and experiencing menopuase?
Hi Omar This is a difficult one, maybe she needs some kind of counselling support, sometimes just having someone to talk to can be a big help. Best wishes Eileen
We tend to recommend seeking the advice of a Nutritional Therapist as diet, liver and bowel function may be factors. They can formulate a personalised treatment plan for you with support. Best Wishes Eileen
This is a tricky question. It can depend on lots of factors, such as, stress, health, diet or lifestyle factors. For some ladies symptoms don’t last too long but for others symptoms can linger a little longer.
I am unsure if it ever really goes away? Maybe in your 70’s? I will be 60 soon and am smack in the middle. I got a long time more to suffer its been 10 years I think another 10 is on the way! And I am pissed but never give up.I must fight my way forward with GODS help.
This post is very informative, as I am a 48 year old premenopausal person having high and low moods swings with severe skin problem during this time. I would like to know if you could talk about the types of HRT that is available and if they are safe to take. My GP has placed me on progesterone HRT Troche compounded as I am really low.
Hi Natasha, as HRT is a prescribed medication, the GP can discuss the different types with you. They can give you professional advice. We tend to recommend alternative herbal remedies such as, the Menopause support tablets.
Thank you for your words. I’m 62 and still feeling sexually active, could it mean my estrogen is still high? My hot flash is violent. Also, do fibroids affect sexual intercourse?🙏
If your libido is still strong that is a usually an indication that you have good oestrogen and/or testosterone levels. Fibroids may affect intercourse as this may cause pain, discomfort or bleeding during or afterwards. Best Wishes Eileen
Interesting how some speak so proudly of not having any interest in intimacy. I am there with my wife who's a bit older than me. She might hide the fact that she's not interested in intimacy.
Hi Tracy You do need to be careful with stimulants such as ginseng if you're on antidepressants; they are usually contraindicated. For libido, you may find the herb Maca can be of help. Best Wishes Eileen
Hi Maria, falling oestrogen levels during the menopause can affect mood and libido and energy level. Try to look after yourself, with plenty of relaxation as the menopause can be very demanding However, ask the doctor to test for low thyroid, low iron, low Vit D or Low Vit B 12. In the meantime, check my web pages for more information on energy and libido.
I'm 40 and having an early menopause and this is exactly how I'm feeling.
It's making my relationship really difficult and upsetting and causing arguments.
I feel totally detached and uninterested in sex .
Me to😢
I find its more of a mental thing also. I am very anxious and sweaty and I don’t even want to sleep in the same bed because its too hot. It can ruin your marriage and it might. It sucks but, I have zero desire to be touched by a man or woman. Yeah just leave me alone sounds so good.
I can relate...with new knowledge acquired, it's very helpful and hopeful..getting better❤
You are amazing I am so glad I have discovered you. You are bringing me out of the dark miserable black hole I’ve been in for too long. I suffered for years with PMT I refuse to suffer again with menopause, I’m going to smack it in the face lol and learn to love me whatever, know it’s a phase and to work with my beautiful body and treat it as a friend not my enemy. Good luck to everyone in the same boat sending love peace and light ❤️❤️
Hi Lisa
Thank you for your lovely words! Go for it! :)
Best Wishes
Eileen
I have no desire at all. I lost it at 50yrs old after a hysterectomy, and the thought of sex is actually sickens me. I was very sexual in my younger years. I now am dead inside...
Does this bother you? It doesn't bother me at all.
I'm so thankful to be single at this time in my life. I have lost all desire and I LOVE it! I feel less distracted and feel I can focus on other passions of mine. It feels like MY TIME. It feels liberating and powerful. When a man approaches me I love thinking.....that I am unattainable, haha. No thanks....Mister.....had enough of relationships and sex was often draining and something I felt I had to do. This is the 3rd time I missed a period in 2 years and it feels so GOOD when my periods are gone. I'm so excited to get my LAST one forever.
I’m also happy at not being plagued with sexual thoughts and urges; I’m making more spiritual progress and if I were single there’d be no “problem “
It's a great advice again and you explain very well. I'm 49 years and my husband is very understanding whenever I refuse to make love sometimes. But we enjoy using Felina lubricant for dryness and it makes us satisfied. Prayers and acceptance is very important to fight stress,anxiety and depression during menopause stage. Thank you so much Eileen for continue sharing your knowledge to enlighten and comfort to all menopause women.😊😇
Green GBM can your husband talk to mine
It's 8:23am Christmas Eve and I'm bringing on your videos and I have heard things that made a light bulb go on. I was scratching, the anxiety, etc. I'm 54 and didn't know my digestion was going haywire because of menopause ☹️. It's so much and the sad part is all of this stuff on social media with young women, with the bodies they ADMIRE and want so bad, they ALL have no idea of what's coming down the pipe line when everything starts to change. Happy Holidays Ladies🌈🌈🌈we who have kind, loving, positive hearts and minds are awesome 👍⭐💖💯
Hi Maureen
Glad to hear that the videos have been helpful for you :)
This post is right on time. Thank you so much for these suggestions and encouragement.
I am thinking my estrogen has gotten way too low. I have tried maca but it increased my appetite. It was nuts.
Damiana is also very good for this difficulty.
Tribulus ( herb) made my libido shoot through the roof, try 1/4 tsp 3x daily, adjust dosing as u need. This herb is not only good for hormonal balance, it’s good for kidneys ( in TCM organ of sexual energy and feminine essence), a gentle diuretic ( much extra weight is actually water retention) , helps you feeling juicy again 🥰
Thank you for this great tip Shakti! :)
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thanks Eileen - once again you're there with invaluable comfort and advice - especially with this issue which is the one thing I've found particularly hard to come to terms with. You're dead right that no.1 is to keep talking to your partner..I would even say that it should be added as an 11th Golden rule from your blog last week...it's very easy for us women to get so focussed on ourselves and our mad bodies that we forget they're living through this 'change' too...
Thanks Catherine
Great video which is precise and to the point. Thank you!
Thanks a lot you help me to understand myself much better. I was devastated by my situation.
Glad I could help Liniwe!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thank u doc...
This help me a lot coping and understanding my situation and yet im right of doing as i talk to my husband
All your vlogs helps a lot to us women who are in menopause phase of life
God bless and more power
Hi Susan
You're welcome, glad to be of help!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Ijust talked to my hubby....He looked at me in a :::::YEAH OKAY::::::: sort of way....and I hope he isnt cofused or anything.....But I will admit....my level hasnt completely disappeared and I tend to use it as soon as possible....after all he is waiting.....The ball is in my court and I should think of his needs also...MENOPAUSE...cant live with it and cant live without it !!!!!!!!!!!
As a Man I was never educated about this. My Wife literally turned into another person right in front of me. She was never actually a sexual person. Today she is like a total stranger to me and she left in Feb this year. This pain is horrible to deal with especially missing my Family together. She has zero desire for intimacy and the rejection over the years had me looking outside of our covenant. That made things even more worse than ever. At this point MY PEACE of mind is more important than a relationship if things stay this way it's impossible to be with her. Our babies are the only true casualties to the court system she put me in even with me still being there for her every way possible. I exhausted with every option I have tried and it's still the same zero effort from her. I guess it took me 10yrs to notice she was kind of always in her own world but now it's a dictatorship.
It’s ok to move on. You will grieve, but you will slowly make changes that will help you feel better. Good luck.
Thank you, this is the best advice I’ve heard. X
You are so welcome
Best Wishes
Eileen
I've been married to my wife over 38 years, she has been going through menopause for the last 5 years, our sex life has depreciated to almost zero, it's sometimes weeks, if not months where we have no sexual contact. I've tried talking to her about our sexual situation, but she gets all hyped up into a frenzy, and becomes very aggressive, so much that she basically flies off the handle, then she shuts down, and refuses to talk to me for sometimes days at a time. Now, we are at a point that we basically live together, but have actually lost our once binding closeness that we once had. I'm overwhelming frustrated, and have no solutions. I've suggested even going together for marriage counseling, or even talking together to her gynecologist, that really makes her lose it. So, what to do? Does anyone out there have any kind of advice, that could bring back the woman that I love?
What a lucky lady to have such an understanding husband! Be patient and show kindness and love, hold her hand etc. She is going through such a tough time and it’s so out of her control. Carry on being a loving husband, she’s very lucky and I’m sure you’ll get your loving wife back soon. Good luck to you both!
Divorce and get a younger partner, or get a girlfriend. Its never going to be how it was with her, and most men can't deal with that. It's how we are wired..we need physical connectivity. Truth.
@@unstoppableplayz6948 to cut, and run is not a solution, nor a option.
@@jerrygillespie6121 it is what is then, my man. Just have to deal with it, and accept your new normal😉
I feel your pain. I've been married to my wife for 36 yrs and your situation sounds exactly like mine.... I can't seen to leave the women I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with when I layed on her, but I can say I'm not happy in my marriage because of the menopause but I'm taking it one day at a time and it has driven me to counseling by myself just to try to make sense of it all. Hang in there
Thanx alot I've learned alot from u...I m not interested in sex anymore and I dnt have any feelings towards it anymore and it's really affecting my marriage...I dnt know how to explain it to my loving husband..
Hi Melody
Hope this helps.
Best Wishes
Eileen
@@AvogelCoUk Thnx again dear..I know wht to do now.
I’m going through all what you explained!!!
I'm gonna see a veterinarian...they can put me down pain-free like dogs. 👍
Girl I am so happy you are helping us ladies I have learn alot fr.you and have help alot.of ladies even some older ladies than me thanks alot
You are so welcome Annet!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Please can we acknowledge, not everyone loses their libido. In fact it can be the opposite, which has challenges of its own.
Yes, you are totally right. All of these various symptoms I discuss on this channel only happen in some women, not all! And menopause symptoms vary hugely across the board.
What about if you can't feel him when it goes in me
Thanks, we learn from experienced person
So nice of you
Best Wishes
Eileen
What would you recommend if you on hormone blockers for breast cancer. Estrogen and progesterone positive.
Hi Leanne
You could investigate the herb Maca but this would need to be taken under the guidance of your consultant. It is known to be hormone balancing although it is not known to be oestrogenic as such
Best Wishes
Eileen
I just don't want to do it because of how I'm feeling with the perimenopause.... not interested at all...my husband sorts of understands but every so often he will say how about it, unfortunately i just dont want to... will this feeling ever change? Thank you as always...yes its the guilt...
Hi Jammyjay
For most women, this is a phase that eases over time but it can depend on a lot of factors such as fatigue, vaginal dryness, mood, stress etc. Some women find that organising a proper date night every so often can help as anticipation can be a good aphrodisiac!
Best Wishes
Eileen
@@AvogelCoUk Thank you Eileen, much appreciated
Take edibles or smoke weed works for me
Thank you.😢
You're welcome 😊
I'm all of the above,don't feel like doing anything NOTHING can't stand my husband ,lol uuuugh can not get nothing done anymore . What do you think about taking the over the counter stuff ?
Hi Tammy
Hopefully the tips in the video will be of help.
Tammy Stegall I want a separation I think its best at this point. I am sick and he doesn’t get it and we have a damn quarantine......what a bad joke on us ladies and my husband retired! Someone come save me please LOl 😂
I still ovulate, so I still have lubricant…but, I also have a very moderate desensitization, and vulvar atrophy…I had been experiencing a fair bit of grief, and I I can tell my hormones have lowered. My periods are getting irregular, but currently still able to have some sort of sex life. I’ve been through the gamut of emotions over the past 10 years, and now I’m less labile. Is vaginal atrophy, and loss of moisture a for sure thing?
Hi Patricia, to some extent it is part of menopause and ageing but a healthy diet and lifestyle can also make a huge difference so it doesn't have to be a sure thing and many women enjoy great sex well past menopause!
Thank you !
What if your partner is not open to pilates, exercise, changing eating habits and being more participating in intimacy after breast cancer and experiencing menopuase?
Hi Omar
This is a difficult one, maybe she needs some kind of counselling support, sometimes just having someone to talk to can be a big help.
Best wishes
Eileen
How do I manage fibroids at 62?🙏😁
We tend to recommend seeking the advice of a Nutritional Therapist as diet, liver and bowel function may be factors. They can formulate a personalised treatment plan for you with support.
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thank you so much. Question does Menopause ever go away?
This is a tricky question. It can depend on lots of factors, such as, stress, health, diet or lifestyle factors. For some ladies symptoms don’t last too long but for others symptoms can linger a little longer.
Unfortunately you are in menopause for the rest of your life. ☹️
I am unsure if it ever really goes away? Maybe in your 70’s? I will be 60 soon and am smack in the middle. I got a long time more to suffer its been 10 years I think another 10 is on the way! And I am pissed but never give up.I must fight my way forward with GODS help.
Menopause is for the rest of your life , how can it go again ? Body stopped producing hormones , that is it .
This post is very informative, as I am a 48 year old premenopausal person having high and low moods swings with severe skin problem during this time. I would like to know if you could talk about the types of HRT that is available and if they are safe to take. My GP has placed me on progesterone HRT Troche compounded as I am really low.
Hi Natasha, as HRT is a prescribed medication, the GP can discuss the different types with you. They can give you professional advice. We tend to recommend alternative herbal remedies such as, the Menopause support tablets.
Thank you madam
Thank you for your words. I’m 62 and still feeling sexually active, could it mean my estrogen is still high? My hot flash is violent.
Also, do fibroids affect sexual intercourse?🙏
If your libido is still strong that is a usually an indication that you have good oestrogen and/or testosterone levels. Fibroids may affect intercourse as this may cause pain, discomfort or bleeding during or afterwards.
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thank u somuch
You're welcome Rose Mary
What about if a person still gets honey at age 63 still on menopause
Many women can still feel sexy and enjoy a regular sex life well past the menopause! :)
Thank you so much .I learned more about menopause.just one question?.can still have sex even I'm menopause?
Hi Patricia
Yes, of course; many women still enjoy and active sex life during the menopause.
Best Wishes
Eileen
@@AvogelCoUk Thank u so much for this very helpful information.God bless!
Interesting how some speak so proudly of not having any interest in intimacy. I am there with my wife who's a bit older than me. She might hide the fact that she's not interested in intimacy.
Thanks so much x please could I take a stimulant herbal for low libido as I’m on an antidepressant?
Hi Tracy
You do need to be careful with stimulants such as ginseng if you're on antidepressants; they are usually contraindicated. For libido, you may find the herb Maca can be of help.
Best Wishes
Eileen
Maybe it's just the inevitable part of life! A morality booster maybe???
*Some women have spouses
Infidelity can switch the wife off.
Well it's too late for me to take birth control I don't know if it makes any difference?
Hi Maria, falling oestrogen levels during the menopause can affect mood and libido and energy level. Try to look after yourself, with plenty of relaxation as the menopause can be very demanding However, ask the doctor to test for low thyroid, low iron, low Vit D or Low Vit B 12. In the meantime, check my web pages for more information on energy and libido.
@@AvogelCoUk thank you for your response. I needed to see that :) again thank you !
Maria Colburn no don’t do it
👍
It is called men on pause 😂Weed helps me❤ and coconut oil
👍🙏📖
When do I get it back ?my libido? The feeling of my my sexi Ness?
I'm hhappy ran across u b c me and my husband been going through and he is 77 I'm 45
Hope it helps in some way Deanna