4 relationship problems caused by menopause & what can help.
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- Опубліковано 6 лют 2025
- From having frequent arguments and feeling unloved to experiencing intimate issues, menopause can cause a number of relationship problems.
To explore these, I take a look at 4 questions I've been asked concerning what can impact your emotional and physical relationships with your partner.
A.Vogel products mentioned:
Stress Relief Daytime: www.avogel.co....
Menopause Support: www.avogel.co....
Omgoodness A.vogel me and my husband of 31 years were just discussing this last night. I told him I wish I could explain to him what I'm going thru. He tries to be so patient with me but at times gets so frustrated with me and it's so hard to explain exactly how I feel and u hit it right on the nail. I'm going to have him watch this video. I can totally totally relate to everything u spoke about here. I think with me being n menopause that I have changed dramatically because of all the hormone changes I've be going thru and sometimes u just feel like ur going crazy and like u said the things that use to interest me no longer do. I just told him last nite I wish I could talk to some one going thru the same thing so I could know what to do. It so good to hear someone talk about this so I know this is totally normal and I'm not alone in this. I so love ur channel and this video couldnt have come at a perfect time. Thank u again. Sending love and blessings ur way❤🥰🙏
Hi Diana, Thank you for sharing and it is good to know that this has helped you feel normal and supported.
@@WeTalkMenopausethank u so much for responding to my comment. Well it didnt turn out like planned. As we were watching the video he would keep pausing it and saying dont I understand? I already know all this! Dont I do this or that?? And I told him please just watch because this is how I feel that I could never fully explain to u. And he kept making it about him so we both just got very frustrated and argued a bit. I slept on the couch. All I kept telling him was I just wanted him to listen to the video because that's how I was feeling. What do I do now? I'm so frustrated and I know he is too but he always makes everything about him☹ can anyone relate?
Sorry to hear that this has not worked out as planned for you. Perhaps a family friend can help explain the affect the menopause has on you or a visit to the GP or try a local therapist to help you both explore feelings or emotions within the relationship.
Love your video! Very true what you said, impatience is one the big problem for me. Thanks love 🙂
I feel so irratable, unloved and like the blinkers came off, I'm usually such a calm person and at work is also very difficult I feel so hopeless... thank u I wasn't aware this.
I recognise these emotions I feel overwhelmed and misunderstood I feel compounded in such distress and it's hurtful. I'm going through a hr process currently never have I ever experienced this in all my working life and I think this may bring me to my knees. I'm helpless
Hi Marina, I hope my article and videos help here. Remember to look after yourself and see the GP if symptoms get too much for you. In the meantime, check out a female vitamin containing magnesium and Vit Bs, as this can support the nervous system during this time. Stress Relief daytime herbal remedy can help take the edge off any feelings of irritability or anger.
Laney Bucknor have you been to a GP? They might be able to help you with the HR issue and explain your problems to them?
Thank you for this very helpful advice. You are so knowledgeable. This is an important topic.
Needed this video. 45 and going through an insane amount of side effects. This helped a lot. Thank you.
You're welcome Sandra!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Hi my Dear thank you sooo much for your lovely speech 😍you’re sooo Knowledgeable ❤️ every day I been asking my self what is wrong with me 😢😢it’s sooo scary and hopeless 😩 I wish I could explain to my husband what I,m going thru . it’s horrible pain omg I wanna be a Normal again 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 I pray and cry 😢 every day I when my life bake sooo bad please please god help us thank you 🙏🏼 🙏🏼🙏🏼🤲🏻🤲🏻🤲🏻
You are welcome, Sultana.
Maybe ask your husband to watch some of the videos; women do find that this can help their partner understand a bit better.
Best Wishes
Eileen
I’m ready to pack up and go. I’m realizing that I have made things too easy for my husband for far too long. He’s spoiled. He doesn’t want to understand, he just wants it to stop. There is no reason to continue.
Wishing you well whatever you decide!
Your statement is confusing. I empathise with women, and realise that menopause is the most difficult period of their lives, and women need all the support they can get. But, I feel after having watched this video, as someone in menopause you must also look at engaging and internalising the issues raised by the good doctor. I feel your statement does not reflect that.
This is me at the moment. My husband doesn’t believe it is menopause.. 😢
Watched this video for the second time, and i must say i missed some important things. At that time I was quite new to my wife going through menopause, the pain was still raw. I am more mature and understanding of my wife and her situation. I will always love. She still don't talk to me about her problems, have the occasional outbursts. I am hanging in there. I will forward this video snd ask her to watch it. Hope we can make strides together. When I needed her, she was always there for me, I don't see why I should abandon her during this difficult period in her life. I just hope she will let me in.
Wishing you both well!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Hi Eileen! Thanks for this, my wife is acting very strange and saying some crazy stuff at the moment. I actually thought she was either going insane, or cheating on me. I knew nothing about menopause but I'm learning now. I was actually going to see a divorce lawyer on Thursday because I thought our 20 year marriage was over. You may have just saved it! Thank you.
Year ago I was chatting with a co-worker and he talked about how his wife left him "out of the blue" when she hit her 50s.
He said she became a different person.
I mentioned that menopause could have caused some of that and look of slow realization that came over his face was something I'll never forget.
Hi Jennifer,
Yes, unfortunatley, this can happen!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thank you I've tried
My wife is telling me about horrible things I said and did to her which have no place in reality. I think you skipped that one, confabulation, the fabrication of stories, aimed at hurting their partners. I love my wife dearly and committed myself to help her during this immense struggle. She wish to rather believe that I am this horrible person, kind of the devil's right hand man, than admitting that it is het hormonal imbalances caused by menopause that is the problem.
I feel for you and experienced extreme abuse and confabulation to the point where my freedom was in danger and my life. I would have stood by my wife and our vows but things reached a point where it was literally killing me - my Dr wanted to admit me to hospital, and we prepared notes for the coronor. I've been out of the house for 9 months and I would be dead otherwise. Unfortunately in a small % of cases it can get really dangerous. I hope my wife eventually gets through this but there reaches a point where if it's live or die, the marriage can't go on.
Great Video! Thank you for providing insight.
Glad it was helpful Eric!
Best Wishes
Eileen
How about honesty and humility. That’s not avoiding an argument. That’s asking for forgiveness and understanding. You are correct but you would have to understand what’s going on and many don’t know their selves in that way, sadly. Even when you can tell them they deny. Going to be tough, show no weakness and then expect mercy and grace.
I don’t have problems with any V dryness but my libido has completely gone 😢I just don’t have the energy or want for any sex.
My girlfriend has been displaying symptoms of perimenopause for just over a year and what you mentioned she is also going through.
Has things changed for you or have you tried any treatment that has helped?
For me, it's not just the intimacy but I am struggling with the anger outbursts combined with other things. It's almost like she hates me sometimes.
My wife’s in the same boat. Cant touch her cause my hands are apparently thermal and sex went from 2+/- X’s a week to 2/3 X’s a month and been married for 20 years and she said I’m crazy for thinking something is wrong. Doesn’t want to talk about anything adult and when pointed out with facts and stuff flys off the handle that I should be worried about myself not her. And that she loves me etc. I suggested HRT and the banshee was released about that. I know it’s menapause but to not even discuss it only leave the door open for a males imagination to go go to dark places as to why this is happening etc. especially when the only intimate contact or any contact whatsoever is during sex so for human contact I only have one choice. I tell her. If you minus off 10/15 minutes a month and we’re just friends. And that’s not cool. Makes for a long month of nothing. Everyone needs to feel desired, wanted important. And apparently I’m crazy and she’s just trying to take care of herself right now. Disheartening, frustrating and the list goes on
I always wondered when I was a young teenager /adult why I see so many older men with young woman. Now being in Menopause I know why! Men should also go in Menopause that their sex drives goes down as well. Unfortunately that is what men is all about!
We (2 women) are always fighting over absolutely nothing
Ah!! Feeling unloved
I'm so thankful for this video my partner, doesn't believe me when I say menopause 😢
You're welcome, glad to be of help!
Best Wishes
Eileen
Yup. The ex wife rewrote the history of our 27 year relationship. Told me it was all my fault. I am a manipulator, a narcissist, and a despite saying I was a good father still threatened to take my boys away from me. Filed for divorce and started dating her boss.
So sorry to hear this Russell, hope your doing well now.
Best Wishes
Eileen
Thank you.you the best
Hi way of explaining so nice but some of patnre don't understand tey trying to get another merig
Hi, thank you so much for your videos. I have a question... can stress and herbs cause bleeding to start up? I have been 9 months without a period, a family crisis just happened and since I found out about it I have been bleeding. I have also had some herbal teas to try to calm down. Maybe it was the herbs? Please let me know your thoughts. Thank you again. CaT
Hi Cat
We do know that any physical or emotional trauma can trigger periods back so this is certainly possible. Herbal teas are usually quite weak and you would need to have taken one with hormonal activity so this is less likely to be a factor.
However, if the bleeding has gone on for more than a week or is getting worse then it is important to contact your doctor.
Best Wishes
Eileen
Hi thank you for getting back to me. It was St. Johns Wort in pill form for my nerves. After some research I found it can "balance" hormones. Not sure thats what happened though...... Thank you for all the great much need info.@@WeTalkMenopause
You're welcome Cat,
We've been selling St John's Wort for many years and we've never found it to balance hormones, although, I suppose it could do this indirectly by calming the nerves :)
I hope this helps
I am struggling with recurring urinary tract infections , it's a nightmare. So many antibiotics I can't take because of side effects. I use all the herbal/natural remedies I know (believe me I know all of them!!) but nothings helping. Sex is a no fly zone and my husband is not a happy man. He blames me because he thinks the way I'm eating is the problem ( I eat an extremely healthy autoimmune paleo diet for arthritis). HOW do you get men to understand that it's not your fault and you're not making this stuff up!!
pauline doyle maybe you can show him some of these videos.
Yes I will be showing my husband as well. But they also have hormones so we have to understand them as well their frustration. Which makes it really hard as well🤦♀️
Hi Pauline, Sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time. It is important to get recurring urine infections checked out by the GP, in case it is not due to the menopause. Check out some of my articles on this topic. At A Vogel UK we stock Cranberry Complex and a herbal remedy called Uva Ursi that might help. You may find drinking heaps more water and a female pro biotic helpful for symptoms from the Health food shop.
@@WeTalkMenopause yes, I use uva ursi, d mannose and an excellent women's probiotic
Hi, just a thought - I only use Dove unscented soap and drink a lot o water - Works for me.
This was so helpful. I’ve been struggling with this so much while
I’ve been going through menopause and was worried that something was very wrong with me. You’ve helped shed light on the hormonal connection that I knew was there, I just didn’t have a name for it. The oxytocin connection is very interesting. I’ve lost interest in not just in sex, but in cuddling and kissing too. I’m hot and uncomfortable all the time (also self image is suffering greatly) and mostly just want to be left alone, so the idea of intimacy is very unappealing. I thought something was wrong with me. Thank you so much for this insight. I hope this is just a phase. Does oxytocin ever increase again on its own if estrogen stays low? I haven’t had a period for a year and 4 months, so I’m hoping that things will start to get better. Does this awfulness pass?
Hi
As far as I am aware, oxytocin doesn't tend to increase again but our body is a marvelous thing and can adapt to lower levels after the menopause; there is no reason why you can't still have an active and satisfying love life post menopause.
Most women do find that their symptoms ease off as they body learns to adapt but this can depend on lifestyle, diet and stress management so it is really important to
How are things now ?
it really sucks menopause stopped my sex life.
.we never touch
I'm 62, post menopausal. I had bad peri menopause,bad menopause, pretty much all the symptoms. Hot flashes and no libido, chronic uti's, vaginal atrophy. I'm much better now, feeling more like myself, but no sex drive. I still have anxiety right before a big hot flash every night! I have no desire to get cozy with him ,I love him but don't like him like I used to. He has changed too. So I waiting for times to get better!
Where do we get your Ebook referenced in this video?
Hi
You should be able to access the book from here; you might need to copy and paste the link www.avogel.co.uk/health/menopause/menopause-ebook.pdf
Hi Eileen, Where can I download your free e-book?
Hi, you can download my free ebook from here: www.avogel.co.uk/health/menopause/menopause-ebook-update-2018.pdf
My sex drive went down so sad we just recently broke up because he's not getting any loving from me. I'm soo sad.
Hi Maria
So sorry to hear :(
You still love him? We 56, and going through where I think she is cheating? Just been distant and no affection like what was normal before. She likes her shopping addiction. I always think she's out cheating, but at 56? Very confusing for me. Would like some clarity and certainty. Says she loves me. And we kiss when go to work. She still gives me sex if I persist. As long as she not cheating then it's OK with me.
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👍🙏
Devorce wife after meopause 17 years of marriage
Sorry to hear that David
Best Wishes
Eileen
Im sorry ladies but you shouldn't be allowed to abuse your husband because your goung threw the change of life
Tell them sugar mamas to smoke some weed😂😂😂
😂
Grounds for divorce 😉
A ‘date night’ with a week’s notice doesn’t just make anyone who is perimenopausal or menopausal calm down and want sex.. thank you for your video but this isn’t great advice in my opinion
Thank you for your comment Rosie
Best Wishes
Eileen