The key to control is WHISPERING…Next fight,let them scream & be the crazy person. You WHISPER every single thing you want to say back. I learned this from watching 2 Netflix shows: Ozark & The Black List-so I tried it & I ’ll be damned,😅 It worked!
Narcs are stupid. The now ex actually hand wrote a letter to me admitting physical, emotional, and financial abuse over 10 yrs. He signed it or i told him i was leaving. I figured he might change. My attorney loved all the little notes i saved over the years. I settled out of court for 51%, moved 500 miles away, bought a house, and 5 yrs later...never heard from the mind fuck again. PURE JOY
My wife learned this is how to start fights when I had no desire. Just start throwing out exaggerations and flat out lies in front of my daughter. My daughter doesn't know any better then to just accept anything she says. When I try to refute, she laughs, talks over me and insists its all true. Then, I raise my voice and I look like I'm the aggressor. They exaggerate, minimize and flat out fabricate. Anything they can think of, they'll try it.
They sound like toddlers throwing tantrums. We must remain calm, cool, & collected. The adult in the room. As the saying goes: "Never let 'em see you sweat." Believe me, I know it's not always easy, but, it's the only way. I also try not to be alone with them (& their recruits aka "flying monkeys") especially when "stating my case." We require a "mediator(s)" in those instances.
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my mother did this. Accused me of being angry, detached from reality, sensitive, you name it, and I went nuts (genuinely did go a bit nuts) defending myself, and all it did was give her material for her smear campaign. Not only do my father and brother stand behind her like foot soldiers, but extended family have not replied to simple texts. Not texts to ''get them on side''. Neutral stuff avoiding the subject of my mother. So, I'm out. I either accept the narrative that I'm insane, detached from reality, angry, sensitive, cold hearted, blah blah blah blah BLAH or that's it. Cold shoulder FOREVER. She still feels like the victim though.😪
Do everything in writing with him and as soon as practicable possible, no contact. He will seek to punish you for revenge, no contact makes that much harder and warn mutual friends, good people will see through the gaslighting.
Ms. Zung, perfect timing! Heading to deposition within the next month; I think I have plenty of documentation. Everything you are saying is 100% spot on. I have a business case and the narc is making numerous false allegations and has their flying monkeys lined up. The narc continues to gas light me and make outrageous comments to bait me. I have not reacted and have remand calm but it is so hard not to respond. Every false allegation they make in an email is truely a gift, I really want to write them a Thank You card, 😂😂😂. Thank you for all your advice, it’s really kept me calm and put things in perspective.
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This is good advice. I lived with a psychopath who burned through eight business partners, and grabbed onto as many enablers to be a part of his 'gang' as he possibly could. There is usually a mutually beneficial financial benefit in it for the enablers. Some sort of bribe. This person was so scary... he swore that he would destroy each and every one of his X partners, after they left his reign of terror. One of them died in a tent, homeless, and drunk- after X stole his business. Since X slept with at least one woman in every business office, he ever worked with, (and blamed his behavior on me- LMAO) I feel that the extra, sex and monetary aspect, added an additional array of emotional impact on their decisions. NPD's form GANGS. Stay out of gang memberships, and think for yourselves. Keep records, and watch Rebecca's videos.
Yes, they form gangs, even in families. Fear reigns, until they run out of steam. The enablers suffer terribly for being caught in their trap and for going along with them. As you say, STAY OUT and away from them. The only things in life they do is compete, steal and lie.
My first act was to trick my narc husband into traveling across the country to his mom's house. I knew when he would be there and so I went to the courthouse to petition for an order of protection and had him served. He did not show up for court and I did not care because I had all the proof in the world. There was 1 week between when he was served and our court date and he never communicated with me because he was a bully and a coward. I won my case and got my no-contact order for a year but we are still married. North Carolina demands a couple to be separated for 1year and 1 day before filing for divorce. I think every state should stay out of a person's right to get divorced. No one stops you or harasses you when you get married so why is my relationship their business? Well, so far I have got 92 days under my belt, and it's okay because he is out of my house and out of my life. Sadly this is not my first rodeo in getting divorced but it will be my last.
@@janetpattison8474 What's worse than stupid NC law is Colorado law. He insisted we get married there. All you have to do is sign a contract and bam! We were married! I don't view it as a real marriage because no vows were taken. Colorado sucks too!
I just lost my father over a year ago. He always made me feel like I was the problem. We didn't speak for the last 6 years of his life. He jumped my case at a birthday party and caused me to melt down and never answered my question about what I did that was so wrong. I told my aunt (his sister) that I wouldn't put up with this with anyone else, and as I grew closer to her husband, she did the same thing to me. Only she accused my wife of being "not very nice." I asked for details, and she said," Why don't you ask your wife." I said you are just like my father and that I would never darken her doorstep again. I have my own family to love, and I'm done with the narcissistic people in my family. I'm also trying to recover from being raised by a narcissist, meaning I have to recognize my own narcissistic behavior and stop hurting others around me. I make UA-cam content now and it is therapy but then you have to deal with comments from people that are "experts". They can't accept that some channels are for entertainment. When will the nightmare end?
Yes! I currently have to contest a restraining order; my evil, narcissistic mother filed false claims against me. Thank you for your help and encouragement.
As far as "reversing the narrative" and "countering the narrative;" What do you do when the agressor is using this same tactic? The aggressor is literally using these counter narc tactics and keeping us at a stalemate. The aggressor is mimicking all of the victims responses and preemptively predicting anything the victim might say.
Thankyou for these videos. I’ve been in and out of court with my abuser for 10 years. I’m headed back for a mobility hearing in August to determine where the kids will live.. I am Self represented as I could no longer continue to afford a lawyer. The kids are preteens and don’t understand the abuse that happened but are convinced they want to stay with their father. He’s a really bad guy and I pray that I can hold my own in court. *sigh.
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self-representation is called pro se. I had to become a self-taught attorney in family law. The battles will rage on till those kids turn 18 regardless of custody.
This is a great reminder. Just what I needed to hear, thank you! I have been dealing with this situation of false accusations for over 2 years. I try to apply these techniques when communicating with the narc. 👍🏼
YES!! As an unofficial narc magnet (seemingly), I Appreciate your Advice! My divorce has been over, but Damn, I wish I woulda known Everything you're talking abt just Period....in High School!
I was led to this ‘episode’ from another recent important clip I just watched. I needed to see this so much, and will use it as a ‘guidebook’ for professional development, which will also help me overall in life.
I have been getting accusations and false allegations against me from before the divorce. We’re seriously coming up on a decade. My ex and his family took a grain of truth and wrapped it up in so many lies. You couldn’t tell what it was anymore. The only thing they wanted was so physical and legal custody of our kids.
Document everything!!!! At some point I realized I wanted to keep track- dates, behaviors, etc& especially whenever possible: “Witnesses”: No matter how seemingly unimportant at the time. Neighbors who heard/ saw etc. School personnel who may recall. for example, a time I came in to my kid’s school, frantic… Long story > short, Though I didn’t have a court order Y E T!- they would not release my kid to crazy narc husband, but they would/ and did!! cooperate by stalling if he showed up before I got there.
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@@RebeccaZungEsq 💐Thank you! I was remiss by not sharing the better stuff: I’ve been free of narcissus for ~20 years already, and if it weren’t for my lamenting over wishing my kids -now adults-had had a lovelier (free from chaos, traumatizing events) childhood, I’d be even happier than I am. In my favor, apparently, turns out I’m what’s likely described as resilient. -which I do not take for granted, as I think it’s probably as much ‘ natural’( genetic?) as it is a function of ,effort of my part. A while back, I found & watched lots of Dr Ramani’s vids on narcissism, especially in relationships. “ Helpful” “ is an understatement.By the way, it was through those that I learned about you, bc you’re in a few of those vids. What you say about courts/ divorce experience is pure gold.💐Thanks for all you do!💐 ~~~>🗽& ⚖️
I don’t contest false accusations, especially those made by anyone that plays golf with the boss or hangs out in their office. If the accuser is loud, melodramatic and tells their side of the story first, I have no chance of being believed. Unless I have an audio or video recording, I can’t prove anything. I can bust liars sometimes by using voice notes recording on my iPhone. I put it in my breast pocket, microphone facing up, and It doesn’t appear like I am recording them. The next confrontation I record, I will use the video recorder, keep it in breast pocket, but take it out and pretend to take still pics to document something visually all the while making a continuous audio recording. I just bought 3 hidden cameras at a spy craft type store. I can’t use any of them or hook them up with IPhone or 2 laptops. It was a waste of $326.
Any suggestion for one that's bound for self-destruction? I dont long for her apology or love, but I have a savior complex knowing full well that she wont change unless she wants to (never happening). She's got about 500 more excuses than most, but it's also tangled in a web of typical behaviors of someone childish/entitled. These excuses are all informed through religion which renders her incapable of seeing reality. I was her only good friend for years always nudging things in the right direction, but she'd go around stacking more rejections and traumas. She eventually tried to be with me and I refused to kiss her (after she cried) then called her 3 days later only to see that she had been kissing another dude. I asked and she waited 3 seconds to respond [confirming my presumption] and simply lied. I mean... all of it is very simple and I"ve always known, but never tried to remedy it past 1/5th the rate (what good would it have done?) I would succinctly call it out, but the 4/5 left of that time she spent on her phone or seeking more noise so that her mind wouldn't have to address any of these issues. Now she has found a means to "exploit" the system (which I've encouraged for years because it was the only spot she wouldn't be taking advantage of people without offering something in return) and has enough money to pretend nothing is her fault it's mesmerizing, but exacerbated the materialism and vanity aspects of her life and behaviors she emulated/became her whole identity (nothing to lean on, really). Everything hurts her and she stacked so many trigger words that she basks in her fight&flight responses. She - inadvertently - told me that a part of her does it on purpose ("she has mastered clashes".. it was as she was answering another question, but wanted to give herself a bit of value so she wrote it quickly before responding to an offer of watching one of the movies I had listed as a counterpart to her insane conditions for us to marry (context: I used myself as bait offering what she wanted in order to determine what was missing since I knew what I was getting into after 9 years of just seeing her as a kid.. never learning the notions I would bring her to formulate, herself
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I got mitigation next month and my narcissistic baby mother falsely filed child support on my to exploit me for money despite me caring for my daughter. Cause i didn't want to put up with her falsely accusing me of cheating cause she was the cheating on me with her ex. I got proof of child endangerment by her having the guy she cheating on me with playing step father to my daughter. Literally he tried to knock down the door down where she stayed that I moved out of threatened suicide with a gun despite being a felon around my daughter. Which by the way she still has around my daughter despite being a risk to her safety. So hopefully it goes well next month. It's just hard coming up with 2k for a lawyer cause she trying to financially ruin me cause i don't want to be with her bitter cheating unfit mother 🍑.
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Talked on phone to a different lawyer. He said what went on when at the hearing when it was placed or extended. My reply, what hearing? I think more are complicit in this. Been arrested twice now in a 10 year period. Both times over nothing. Yet what happened was right. The judge on the last appearance bond, started threatening me. Ive never been fingerprinted eye scanned voice recognition or jailed before this crap. She is 10 years of Wont Pay ordered kid support. Nothing is wrong with that though.
How does a man refute accusations of physical abuse toward his wife when there was none? She smeared me around our town as a "wife beater" and then submitted an affidavit to court to get me thrown out of our home. So sick and wrong.
@janetpattison8474 Her lawyer and, as I found out too late, my lawyer, had been friends for 20 years. Her attorney (overt narcissist) took over. He was friends with the judge. I was disabled for 13 years and removed from the home. My wife and her lover got the home, and I got the street. A travesty of justice. She can have the affair, smear me hard, ruin my life, and keep our belongings? Crazy! Found out she is a covert narcissist. She was the strongest, fiercest fighter, posing as a victim.
@@JulietCrowson Thank you. It's all over now. Sad situation when she decided to have her boyfriend move into our marital home. She was willing to do whatever it took to kill me off. A true covert narcissist.
Yes! But it also helps when you don't have a corrupt judge violating your Due Process and 4th Amendment rights. Contra Costa County Martinez court system has a corruption problem with the district Attorneys office, attorneys and some judges.
My spouse filed for divorce. We have attorneys. We are still in the discovery stage. Ive been told, . I have been told by my attorney that, NY law is an equitable distribution and the court just sees the divorce as a business transaction and that they do not take theses types of accusations into account. It's just a matter of decided assets. Is this True? In regards to custody of children we do not have that issue, we have two adult children who live on their own. Thank You in advance!
Yeah I had to deal with many many many false allegations but I could not do anything about it because I had no one on my side, I had no witnesses, I just had to cope until I found an Beautiful Powerful Angel 👼 Queen 👸 that took me thirty five years to find her as my first Therapist!!!
In my case, out of the blue, she accused me of cheating and being a compulsive liar. I said to her okay. What else you got ? You guessed it. She ended the ephemeral relationship right there and then. I went out to do a belly dance in the rain.
The false allegations simply disappeared... problem: the judge of the family court used them to argument her "judgement". Appeal is about to come... And the same person blocks another case of the same appeal court.
@@imbalancedstatus8824 James 5:12 KJV ■ But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation. BLB
My mother is a narc. I have got to the stage im tired of holding a conversation with her. I know if i bring something up what the reaction is going to be so i tread carefully. She is such a Debbie downer, i can predit everything she is going to say 99.99999999999times out of 100. I want a "normal" conversation, not one where i can predict reply, not one where i want to cut my throat, it is truly getting exhausting and wonder how much longet it will go on for😫😵😱😡😠😤🙄🤬🤮
Lol just give it back 100000 times more tell them the truth and just ignore them if they say hi or bye. My manager always puts the blame on me even though it was her mistake. And she's always saying don't text me and when I mention it to her she says I don't know what your talking about lol. Keep documentions that's a no no as I could say you done x y z but yet I wasn't there so how would I know if you did what because I wrote it down thats not evidence.
OH WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS????!!!! His lawyer withdrew in May. I figure he's just using his criminal attny. So I show up to go it alone. He's a no-show! What does this MEAN! Now, the new court date is ATER the criminal hearing. If he goes to prison(likely), will it be harder to divorce him? Easier? I can't believe this!
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They don't like facts, humor, twists, and no's. Given enough time, ... they get tangled up in their own distortions.
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
The key to control is WHISPERING…Next fight,let them scream & be the crazy person. You WHISPER every single thing you want to say back. I learned this from watching 2 Netflix shows: Ozark & The Black List-so I tried it & I ’ll be damned,😅 It worked!
Narcs are stupid. The now ex actually hand wrote a letter to me admitting physical, emotional, and financial abuse over 10 yrs. He signed it or i told him i was leaving. I figured he might change. My attorney loved all the little notes i saved over the years. I settled out of court for 51%, moved 500 miles away, bought a house, and 5 yrs later...never heard from the mind fuck again. PURE JOY
My wife learned this is how to start fights when I had no desire. Just start throwing out exaggerations and flat out lies in front of my daughter. My daughter doesn't know any better then to just accept anything she says. When I try to refute, she laughs, talks over me and insists its all true. Then, I raise my voice and I look like I'm the aggressor. They exaggerate, minimize and flat out fabricate. Anything they can think of, they'll try it.
They sound like toddlers throwing tantrums. We must remain calm, cool, & collected. The adult in the room. As the saying goes: "Never let 'em see you sweat."
Believe me, I know it's not always easy, but, it's the only way. I also try not to be alone with them (& their recruits aka "flying monkeys") especially when "stating my case." We require a "mediator(s)" in those instances.
Is it possible to negotiate with narcissists and not feel like you're losing your power? Introducing....OUTSMART A NARCISSIST A 4-STEP PROVEN PLAN To Take Your Power Back! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM ✨
my mother did this. Accused me of being angry, detached from reality, sensitive, you name it, and I went nuts (genuinely did go a bit nuts) defending myself, and all it did was give her material for her smear campaign. Not only do my father and brother stand behind her like foot soldiers, but extended family have not replied to simple texts. Not texts to ''get them on side''. Neutral stuff avoiding the subject of my mother. So, I'm out. I either accept the narrative that I'm insane, detached from reality, angry, sensitive, cold hearted, blah blah blah blah BLAH or that's it. Cold shoulder FOREVER. She still feels like the victim though.😪
Dealt with the same thing, absolutely disgusting behavior. So thankful I am no longer in that situation!!!! Glad you aren’t either!!!
@@SusanaXpeace2u that's disaster, I'm so sorry. Try to find a couple good people to have a good relationship with.
Oh yah I’m tired of these false accusations … lying is so bad with my soon to be x its caused our whole family to breakdown
He was just being uncharitable with the truth...see the difference?
Do everything in writing with him and as soon as practicable possible, no contact. He will seek to punish you for revenge, no contact makes that much harder and warn mutual friends, good people will see through the gaslighting.
How are you doing now? Hope feeling well and getting your power back! Perhaps my upcoming webinar might help - ICANSLAY.COM
Yes the mails with evidence against them shows that this is their insane level of unawareness and underrating you
Thank you...yes yes yes....exposing a cult...is traumatic
Ms. Zung, perfect timing! Heading to deposition within the next month; I think I have plenty of documentation. Everything you are saying is 100% spot on. I have a business case and the narc is making numerous false allegations and has their flying monkeys lined up. The narc continues to gas light me and make outrageous comments to bait me. I have not reacted and have remand calm but it is so hard not to respond. Every false allegation they make in an email is truely a gift, I really want to write them a Thank You card, 😂😂😂. Thank you for all your advice, it’s really kept me calm and put things in perspective.
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes!>> ICANSLAY.COM ✨
This is good advice. I lived with a psychopath who burned through eight business partners, and grabbed onto as many enablers to be a part of his 'gang' as he possibly could. There is usually a mutually beneficial financial benefit in it for the enablers. Some sort of bribe. This person was so scary... he swore that he would destroy each and every one of his X partners, after they left his reign of terror. One of them died in a tent, homeless, and drunk- after X stole his business. Since X slept with at least one woman in every business office, he ever worked with, (and blamed his behavior on me- LMAO) I feel that the extra, sex and monetary aspect, added an additional array of emotional impact on their decisions. NPD's form GANGS. Stay out of gang memberships, and think for yourselves. Keep records, and watch Rebecca's videos.
Yes, they form gangs, even in families. Fear reigns, until they run out of steam. The enablers suffer terribly for being caught in their trap and for going along with them. As you say, STAY OUT and away from them. The only things in life they do is compete, steal and lie.
My first act was to trick my narc husband into traveling across the country to his mom's house. I knew when he would be there and so I went to the courthouse to petition for an order of protection and had him served. He did not show up for court and I did not care because I had all the proof in the world. There was 1 week between when he was served and our court date and he never communicated with me because he was a bully and a coward. I won my case and got my no-contact order for a year but we are still married. North Carolina demands a couple to be separated for 1year and 1 day before filing for divorce. I think every state should stay out of a person's right to get divorced. No one stops you or harasses you when you get married so why is my relationship their business? Well, so far I have got 92 days under my belt, and it's okay because he is out of my house and out of my life. Sadly this is not my first rodeo in getting divorced but it will be my last.
i round of marriage was enough for me also.
@@janetpattison8474 What's worse than stupid NC law is Colorado law. He insisted we get married there. All you have to do is sign a contract and bam! We were married! I don't view it as a real marriage because no vows were taken. Colorado sucks too!
She must be empathic giving so much advice away. Thanks dearie
You’ve nailed it really well describing their behavior. I am very grateful to You for this explanation and advice!!!
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This is great advice.I always have good attorneys,because sometimes I can't believe the things that happen to me.Yeah ❤❤
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I just lost my father over a year ago. He always made me feel like I was the problem. We didn't speak for the last 6 years of his life. He jumped my case at a birthday party and caused me to melt down and never answered my question about what I did that was so wrong. I told my aunt (his sister) that I wouldn't put up with this with anyone else, and as I grew closer to her husband, she did the same thing to me. Only she accused my wife of being "not very nice." I asked for details, and she said," Why don't you ask your wife." I said you are just like my father and that I would never darken her doorstep again. I have my own family to love, and I'm done with the narcissistic people in my family. I'm also trying to recover from being raised by a narcissist, meaning I have to recognize my own narcissistic behavior and stop hurting others around me. I make UA-cam content now and it is therapy but then you have to deal with comments from people that are "experts". They can't accept that some channels are for entertainment. When will the nightmare end?
When you decide that these people no longer have control over your life and the person you are ❤
Yes! I currently have to contest a restraining order; my evil, narcissistic mother filed false claims against me. Thank you for your help and encouragement.
Unless you live with her.. I will just let her win this one and go No Contact
As far as "reversing the narrative" and "countering the narrative;"
What do you do when the agressor is using this same tactic? The aggressor is literally using these counter narc tactics and keeping us at a stalemate. The aggressor is mimicking all of the victims responses and preemptively predicting anything the victim might say.
Thankyou for these videos. I’ve been in and out of court with my abuser for 10 years. I’m headed back for a mobility hearing in August to determine where the kids will live.. I am Self represented as I could no longer continue to afford a lawyer. The kids are preteens and don’t understand the abuse that happened but are convinced they want to stay with their father. He’s a really bad guy and I pray that I can hold my own in court. *sigh.
Sorry to hear about what you've been through. If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo!ICANSLAY.COM ✨
self-representation is called pro se. I had to become a self-taught attorney in family law. The battles will rage on till those kids turn 18 regardless of custody.
This is a great reminder. Just what I needed to hear, thank you! I have been dealing with this situation of false accusations for over 2 years. I try to apply these techniques when communicating with the narc. 👍🏼
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
Thanks!
Thank you so very much Rebecca. You are so helpful and very smart.
YES!! As an unofficial narc magnet (seemingly), I Appreciate your Advice! My divorce has been over, but Damn, I wish I woulda known Everything you're talking abt just Period....in High School!
Absolutely excellent articulation and strategies in here. 11:11 is my relationship with my wife so YES.
Ty for this. I'm so glad I've never deleted ANYTHING. There's so many texts and e-mails etc that I have. 7:50
I was led to this ‘episode’ from another recent important clip I just watched. I needed to see this so much, and will use it as a ‘guidebook’ for professional development, which will also help me overall in life.
I have been getting accusations and false allegations against me from before the divorce. We’re seriously coming up on a decade. My ex and his family took a grain of truth and wrapped it up in so many lies. You couldn’t tell what it was anymore. The only thing they wanted was so physical and legal custody of our kids.
Thank you for great advice 😊
Yes, yes, and yes!!!!
Rebec! This is the best. ..
Yes I’m hearing you… slayers unite!!!
Very helpful!
Interesting 🤔 that example of the tire slashed - strategy #5
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Thank you .
Thank you Rebecca
This is absolutely true❤ thankkkk youuu
YES I understand so far
Document everything!!!! At some point I realized I wanted to keep track- dates, behaviors, etc& especially whenever possible: “Witnesses”: No matter how seemingly unimportant at the time. Neighbors who heard/ saw etc. School personnel who may recall. for example, a time I came in to my kid’s school, frantic… Long story > short, Though I didn’t have a court order Y E T!- they would not release my kid to crazy narc husband, but they would/ and did!! cooperate by stalling if he showed up before I got there.
Sorry to hear about what you've been through. If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo!ICANSLAY.COM ✨
@@RebeccaZungEsq 💐Thank you! I was remiss by not sharing the better stuff: I’ve been free of narcissus for ~20 years already, and if it weren’t for my lamenting over wishing my kids -now adults-had had a lovelier (free from chaos, traumatizing events) childhood, I’d be even happier than I am. In my favor, apparently, turns out I’m what’s likely described as resilient. -which I do not take for granted, as I think it’s probably as much ‘ natural’( genetic?) as it is a function of ,effort of my part. A while back, I found & watched lots of Dr Ramani’s vids on narcissism, especially in relationships. “ Helpful” “ is an understatement.By the way, it was through those that I learned about you, bc you’re in a few of those vids. What you say about courts/ divorce experience is pure gold.💐Thanks for all you do!💐
~~~>🗽& ⚖️
I don’t contest false accusations, especially those made by anyone that plays golf with the boss or hangs out in their office. If the accuser is loud, melodramatic and tells their side of the story first, I have no chance of being believed. Unless I have an audio or video recording, I can’t prove anything. I can bust liars sometimes by using voice notes recording on my iPhone. I put it in my breast pocket, microphone facing up, and It doesn’t appear like I am recording them. The next confrontation I record, I will use the video recorder, keep it in breast pocket, but take it out and pretend to take still pics to document something visually all the while making a continuous audio recording. I just bought 3 hidden cameras at a spy craft type store. I can’t use any of them or hook them up with IPhone or 2 laptops. It was a waste of $326.
Any suggestion for one that's bound for self-destruction? I dont long for her apology or love, but I have a savior complex knowing full well that she wont change unless she wants to (never happening). She's got about 500 more excuses than most, but it's also tangled in a web of typical behaviors of someone childish/entitled. These excuses are all informed through religion which renders her incapable of seeing reality. I was her only good friend for years always nudging things in the right direction, but she'd go around stacking more rejections and traumas. She eventually tried to be with me and I refused to kiss her (after she cried) then called her 3 days later only to see that she had been kissing another dude. I asked and she waited 3 seconds to respond [confirming my presumption] and simply lied. I mean... all of it is very simple and I"ve always known, but never tried to remedy it past 1/5th the rate (what good would it have done?) I would succinctly call it out, but the 4/5 left of that time she spent on her phone or seeking more noise so that her mind wouldn't have to address any of these issues. Now she has found a means to "exploit" the system (which I've encouraged for years because it was the only spot she wouldn't be taking advantage of people without offering something in return) and has enough money to pretend nothing is her fault it's mesmerizing, but exacerbated the materialism and vanity aspects of her life and behaviors she emulated/became her whole identity (nothing to lean on, really). Everything hurts her and she stacked so many trigger words that she basks in her fight&flight responses. She - inadvertently - told me that a part of her does it on purpose ("she has mastered clashes".. it was as she was answering another question, but wanted to give herself a bit of value so she wrote it quickly before responding to an offer of watching one of the movies I had listed as a counterpart to her insane conditions for us to marry (context: I used myself as bait offering what she wanted in order to determine what was missing since I knew what I was getting into after 9 years of just seeing her as a kid.. never learning the notions I would bring her to formulate, herself
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YES
I got mitigation next month and my narcissistic baby mother falsely filed child support on my to exploit me for money despite me caring for my daughter. Cause i didn't want to put up with her falsely accusing me of cheating cause she was the cheating on me with her ex. I got proof of child endangerment by her having the guy she cheating on me with playing step father to my daughter. Literally he tried to knock down the door down where she stayed that I moved out of threatened suicide with a gun despite being a felon around my daughter. Which by the way she still has around my daughter despite being a risk to her safety. So hopefully it goes well next month. It's just hard coming up with 2k for a lawyer cause she trying to financially ruin me cause i don't want to be with her bitter cheating unfit mother 🍑.
Sorry to hear about what you've been through. If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo!ICANSLAY.COM ✨
Talked on phone to a different lawyer. He said what went on when at the hearing when it was placed or extended. My reply, what hearing? I think more are complicit in this. Been arrested twice now in a 10 year period. Both times over nothing. Yet what happened was right. The judge on the last appearance bond, started threatening me. Ive never been fingerprinted eye scanned voice recognition or jailed before this crap. She is 10 years of Wont Pay ordered kid support. Nothing is wrong with that though.
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How does a man refute accusations of physical abuse toward his wife when there was none? She smeared me around our town as a "wife beater" and then submitted an affidavit to court to get me thrown out of our home. So sick and wrong.
@janetpattison8474 Her lawyer and, as I found out too late, my lawyer, had been friends for 20 years. Her attorney (overt narcissist) took over. He was friends with the judge. I was disabled for 13 years and removed from the home. My wife and her lover got the home, and I got the street. A travesty of justice. She can have the affair, smear me hard, ruin my life, and keep our belongings? Crazy! Found out she is a covert narcissist. She was the strongest, fiercest fighter, posing as a victim.
Get her analysed by a therapist, poss family therapist
and yourself...personality traits might reveal true nature to a court
@@JulietCrowson Thank you. It's all over now. Sad situation when she decided to have her boyfriend move into our marital home. She was willing to do whatever it took to kill me off. A true covert narcissist.
@@doranvee5944 hope you recover ok and stronger eating well will help
I've found praying daily helps a lot
Take care
Love you Rebbeca!
I'm at the point where 'the most honest, boring woman I knew for 6 years' was lying and cheating perfectly all along.
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YOU ARE AWSOME !!
Yes!!! YES!!!
🤬 What they say 🗡️, and the games.J3 👍
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Yes!
Yes
Yes!
But it also helps when you don't have a corrupt judge violating your Due Process and 4th Amendment rights. Contra Costa County Martinez court system has a corruption problem with the district Attorneys office, attorneys and some judges.
YES! 🙌
Yes. I control my emotions more often then in the face of their flying monkeys
yes
YES! 12:28
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The best response is NO response..
That will elicit Narcissistic Rage. I know...been there
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@@imbalancedstatus8824 And? The rage WON'T bother you if ypu simply DON'T respond
@@BAKER22-l4u It never bothered me.. I always grab a beer and start drinking.. Cant talk if your mouth is full with beer.
@@imbalancedstatus8824 Drinking is NOT the answer..It's a crutch and you need help
YES!
Yes!!!!
My spouse filed for divorce. We have attorneys. We are still in the discovery stage. Ive been told, . I have been told by my attorney that, NY law is an equitable distribution and the court just sees the divorce as a business transaction and that they do not take theses types of accusations into account. It's just a matter of decided assets. Is this True?
In regards to custody of children we do not have that issue, we have two adult children who live on their own. Thank You in advance!
Yeah I had to deal with many many many false allegations but I could not do anything about it because I had no one on my side, I had no witnesses, I just had to cope until I found an Beautiful Powerful Angel 👼 Queen 👸 that took me thirty five years to find her as my first Therapist!!!
Yes yes yes
In my case, out of the blue, she accused me of cheating and being a compulsive liar. I said to her okay. What else you got ? You guessed it. She ended the ephemeral relationship right there and then. I went out to do a belly dance in the rain.
How are you doing now? Hope feeling well and getting your power back! Perhaps my upcoming webinar might help - ICANSLAY.COM
YES YES YES
Do you have an associate lawyer or could you recommend a lawyer that handle narcissist cases in Mexico? I appreciate your answer
The false allegations simply disappeared... problem: the judge of the family court used them to argument her "judgement".
Appeal is about to come... And the same person blocks another case of the same appeal court.
Your the best gitl❤🎉
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
Thank You .l..
How are you doing now? Hope feeling well and getting your power back! Perhaps my upcoming webinar might help - ICANSLAY.COM
YES!!!
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
I’m currently dealing with this any help any one I can talk to ?
Yes ❤❤❤❤❤
"No." Is my response. ■ I may offer what is true. I leave it there; they will have to 'own it'. M
They hate short answers! Sorry for autocorrect
@@imbalancedstatus8824 James 5:12 KJV ■ But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation. BLB
@@margiechism i was saying they, the Narcs, hate short answer... because they are lookng for fight and blame shifting.
How are you doing now? Hope feeling well and getting your power back! Perhaps my upcoming webinar might help - ICANSLAY.COM
16:08 😂 ohnyeah
yes YES YESSSSS
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
What happens when a narcissist not only withholds pertinent legal information from you, but somehow convinces the legal system to do the same as well?
o hell yes
🎉
My attorney just let it happen, tirns iut ahe a womans advocate. Learned this After final orders. Destroyed me.
The other children of my parents are so narcissistic
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My mother is a narc. I have got to the stage im tired of holding a conversation with her. I know if i bring something up what the reaction is going to be so i tread carefully. She is such a Debbie downer, i can predit everything she is going to say 99.99999999999times out of 100. I want a "normal" conversation, not one where i can predict reply, not one where i want to cut my throat, it is truly getting exhausting and wonder how much longet it will go on for😫😵😱😡😠😤🙄🤬🤮
Family ■ are trainers, and some may never be good leaders; it is a position that decades practice the relationship. M
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
🙏💜🌍💜🌍💜🌍💜🌍💜🌍💜🙏
How are you doing now? Hope feeling well and getting your power back! Perhaps my upcoming webinar might help - ICANSLAY.COM
How do I save my granddaughters from the mother
Lol just give it back 100000 times more tell them the truth and just ignore them if they say hi or bye. My manager always puts the blame on me even though it was her mistake. And she's always saying don't text me and when I mention it to her she says I don't know what your talking about lol. Keep documentions that's a no no as I could say you done x y z but yet I wasn't there so how would I know if you did what because I wrote it down thats not evidence.
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@RebeccaZungEsq no I don't thing so as your all bullshit sorry
They do not have a normal sense of humour. A male narcissist saw one day watching kick boxing and laughing continuously
Proof is their Criptonite.
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OH WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS????!!!! His lawyer withdrew in May. I figure he's just using his criminal attny. So I show up to go it alone. He's a no-show! What does this MEAN! Now, the new court date is ATER the criminal hearing. If he goes to prison(likely), will it be harder to divorce him? Easier? I can't believe this!
Yes!
Yes
YES
Good advice! 🙏
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YES!!!!
By following my 4 Step plan, you can win when dealing with narcissism! Learn more >> ICANSLAY.COM 🌟
Yes!
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
YES
Yes
If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes!>> ICANSLAY.COM ✨
Yes!
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- ICANSLAY.COM 💪
Yes!
It's Time to Break Free for Good...Let's Do This! Sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- ICANSLAY.COM 💪