Can I just say you conducted this interview with utmost professionalism and empathy..I see you bit your tongue in some parts but you were respectful and allowed her to talk and express herself..kudos to you sir.
I’m 31 single with no kids atm in time. This podcast continues to remind me HARSHLY that I need to find the RIGHT WOMAN. The sleeping aroundvting has to get LOCKED OFF! All this headache with baby mothers is TOO MUCH 😵💫😵💫😭😭🤣
Trust me be careful the wrong woman would falsely accuse you and be quick to put you on child maintenance. They would hate you and desperately want your money
Trust me as an older woman with sons that’s the best decision you can make - and take your time and choose wisely- my son has 1 mother of his children and they had two children together- she had a bad upbringing and she is a nightmare for my son - so choose very wisely! And they are not together anymore - thank god !!
I think as women, we have to exercise more discernment and self control. The first baby father didn’t seem too bad in comparison and each relationship seemed to get progressively worse. What impact did that have on the children. God know sometimes my husband gets on my nerves. But hearing these types of situation, I give thanks. Truly
This happens when you have unresolved childhood/teenage ‘wounds’ that you haven’t healed from. Your vision is blinkered- you make choices that only temporarily massage your wounds. The Universe doesn’t give us the people that we want, the Universe gives us the people that we need- these people teach us painful lessons about where we are in our ‘growth’ in life. They expose our lack of self love. And we either sink- become victims to our challenges with them or we swim, and become victors to them by starting our‘healing journey’- going for therapy, dealing with the effects of past abuses, beginning self development courses etc. This way ‘every mistake will be a blessing’.
Sis. You’ve got way too much compassion for these men and not enough for yourself and your children. Babydad 4 is absolutely wilddddddd. To still be with this man is absurd. What example are you setting for your daughters.
I think people in general need to be mindful when they are making assumptions about children. Based on a tiny snippet of what you have watched, the talk about how well my children do was talked about and edited... but that doesn't matter because you have nothing to go off to make such an assumption. My children come first, in love, opportunities, growth, finances, etc, You assume I have no compassion for myself because you are not hearing me talk about my achievements or my growth from all of this... but where my children are concerned, I would ask people not to be so disrespectful with their assumptions..
@@transparencywithfire1195 I think you were indirectly blaming the other baby mama for getting pregnant and her mother for advising her to be in a relationship with this man. The point is the man is equally responsible for creating a baby and being in contact with her. If you have unprotected sex the chances are a baby will come. Both mother and father are equally responsible. Also you do not know what conversation he had with her or what he told her about you. All of these other women are victims too and if they remain in this situation then they are willing victims. He (#4) is an irresponsible man and lacks integrity. Regardless of what his background/childhood experience was he is now a man and can make choices. Imagine being raped as a child and raping other children using the excuse that I am damaged because this happened to me. Please stop making excuses for him and consider the impact his behaviour will have on all of your children plus his other kids. He does not need to be in any relationship right now but undergoing extensive therapy and learning to take responsibility. He is either broken or damaged and not healthy for children to see as a role model. What about the influence of his mother on your daughters? Please protect your children. You seem like a great person with lots of compassion. I wish all parties involved healing and trust that he gets the help he needs.
I agree with you..the advice she is giving women..she is not taking it. Whilst her BF's mum says what she says about men..she is not saying it but demonstrating..kids tend to follow what they are as opposye to what they are told
She definitely wont see it, but she is both attracting and allowing such behavior. Explaining, justifying the situation wont change anything. Healing and self love is the way, and without that a pattern of toxic relationships will continue.
It's funny the way the world works... with the little I've told everyone seems to think that it's my sexual relationship choices that I need healing from... wow. From loosing my parent, ypungest sister, cousins and friends in such sudden and painful ways... you all focus on the stupidity of the male actions in my life. The world we live in, is a confused one.
@@transparencywithfire1195 both can be true. That healing is needed for your grief and romantic relationships. From what you said in this video, both caused significant trauma
Respect to any woman with 4 kids. But just because someone can justify why they are the way they are, doesn’t mean you need to deal with it in your life. It doesn’t matter how many kids you have with how many men, doesn’t mean you need to put up with disrespect and cheating. Especially if you have young girls watching you. Self respect over everything.
This literally drained my energy. Low self esteem often looks for a project to relieve its symptoms and I believe this is the case in this story. Very sad that beautiful, intelligent ladies get caught up in this cycle.
She said they are not intimate at the moment and in the same breath said this SAME man who’s been moving the WILDEST is not sleeping with anybody else. And she said it in all seriousness. Women… we gotta do better, man. This is sad. I’m not sure why this kind of content popped up for me but I watched it to the end and I’m shocked.
8:18 - WOW! One of the most powerful questions I have heard of late. Her abuser curled up in a ball asking why she lets him do that to her. There’s the money shot right there! Abusers need help and we as people need to help them. How do we help them? By not tolerating their bull for any length of time even if it means leaving them. That’s kindness. You help them and ultimately yourself.
My dad was with my mum for years, and he did not cheat he is an amazing man there is no excuses for bad behaviour. We have to be accountable for our own bad choices that we make in our life
Your mum was lucky that your dad was the same man he pertained to be before and after they had you. It’s not always about taking accountability for your choices it’s about taking responsibility for your decisions which she is.
This sounds like struggle love! As women, If we know our worth, core values, beliefs and life goals we will attract and choose to put ourselves and our needs first. She has most definitely been vulnerable especially during the times of loss and grief. We cant change how other people behave, only they can make a conscious choice to do that. We can only change our own patterns of behavior. History has a habit of repeating itself so the intergenerational trauma may show up in the children. Now she is choosing to teach him how to be a father&patner like hes her son . I really do wish this beautiful queen the best and i hope that she continues her journey to healing 💕
I got a little confused with the back stories that seemed to have nothing to do with the 'baby father' story. Seems like she has a lot of drama or trauma in her life. Therapy is needed.
HI, yes, it was very confusing doing the interview as I was coming to share one part of my life, which is the current part, this is over 22 years, and I was answering questions. The interview took 2.5 hours and I haven't watched the edits, but I do speak about my having a lot of therapy. the back story is related to the questions I was asked and to each relationship at the time
@@motionalvoicesno need to explain yourself. You are not in charge of editing and such sensitive interviews are not easy. You are only human! Keep it up! All the best to your and your family! God bless!
She’s telling her story so she can tell it how she wants those things that might seem irrelevant to you might not be to her and it paints a picture of the audience about where she is coming from and her experiences you can’t tell her story any better than her.
A lot of men really need to raise the bar and stop sleeping around with no thought for the impact on the children and their mothers. It is a shame and what does it teach children about responsibility.
I can’t sympathise for her because after ALL THAT she’s STILL with the guy and still has not learned from past relationship experiences. Then his mum is just there manipulating her saying “all men cheat, it’s normal” and to install those same views to her daughter to repeat generational trauma. Also the guy just gaslighting with fake tears. How disappointing. How are you supposed to heal and grow into a better person? What about focusing on other things like career aspirations? Wasting time on low-vibrational and broken men, fighting other women over a guy who doesn’t care.
Sorry... I am definitely not in need of anyone sympathising with me. I am certainly not fighting with other women... how you heard that is beyond me.... no one is wasting time on anything! What story did you listen to? Do you know what I do and what qualifications I have or do you think I sit on my bum on benefits. You need to not make up stuff in your head that hasn't been spoken about
@@transparencywithfire1195 Watched the whole podcast and that’s what the result was. It IS a waste of your time communicating with various side pieces and STILL proceeding to do more with the guy after all that evidence. The interviewer asked you towards the end of the podcast why after all of this, you went back to him and then you tried to justify his behaviour to make it seem as if he’s also a victim, trying to save him. That’s is a toxic and vicious cycle. He also further threatened to walk out of his kids life AGAIN, if you chose to be with another man. Again, keeping you in the fist of his hands to continue boosting his ego. Is that not a waste of time? The positive thing about this is that hopefully your story can educate young women to not fall into this in the future.
@@melaninmel9213 yh I think you missed the whole part of me saying I believe in trying to keep the family together, us not being intimate and me trying but it's hard... it's not the best interview so I get it... but it's very rushed. I don't disagree with you. I just don't understand how anyone can see their children long for a parent and not try give them what they want. It's why I respect that my eldest daughters father stayed away, because she didn't go through that with him. My heart is not like this men as you may assume. I explain, it's exactly how I am with everyone. I don't like to see hurt and I forgive
@@transparencywithfire1195 I haven’t missed the bit where you said you are a firm believer of keeping the family together, but it’s not a healthy environment for everyone involved. Yes, ideally it would be nice to keep the family together to break the stigma of children being in a single parent household/having an absent parent, IF the situation was healthy and both parents are able to co-parent. But this guy’s intentions does not benefit anyone but himself based on what is being said in this interview and the things he say is a way of trapping your own freedom. So why should anyone continue to suffer at the price of others? That’s what I believe is the case here
@melaninmel9213 girl, you can't reason with unhealed people. She's convinced herself that her choices are justified, so let her get on with it. The only ones who suffer are the kids at the end of the day. 🙏🏾
It’s so important for women as well as men to recognise abusive behaviour in its mildest forms to prevent these toxic relationships. This comes from high self esteem, confidence and discipline to leave what is not for you and your children if you have them. As parents you owe it to your children to make wise life choices wherever possible.
There all a bunch of narcissists, and unfortunately this lady seems like a healer and attracts broken people. She has immense strength, but girl if you run with you catch fleas. Your kids deserve peace as well as you!
It’s easy to see something clearly from the outside in. Sometimes you don’t see the wood for the trees when you’re in a situation. No one who is decent deserves to be ill treated or disrespected. If a man doesn’t want to commit then that is a huge red flag to move on. Dont make babies with non committed partners. She sounds very honest and intelligent. She deserves to allow herself to heal, know exactly what she wants and stay focused on it. She needs to stay well clear of those that do not show her respect.
I think it’s not about picking the right people. I think it’s about healing the wounds of your childhood/teenage years- then you will attract better people into your life, you will ‘see’ clearer and you will not allow yourself to remain in dysfunctional relationships as your self awareness and self love will be developing.
Interesting. Before the welfare, family lived closer and were their own safety network. Since the welfare state families are seen as problematic as welfare is the road to freedom. I think depending on the family there may be things of benefit.
Your 4th one was bread crumbing you . I'm glad u shared your story. Your insight has shown women like me that self love is key & boundaries is the only way to be safe and sane in life
I will keep it respectful and just say this. After seeing the card in the first instance that should have been enough. Anything after that is self-inflicted. A leopard doesn't change its spots, it just looks for the next pray, and the next and the next.......... He won't change. The young lady needs to accept accountability which I am not hearing.
@@time4advancement244 He is toxic. Who refuses to be in a child's life because they are not with the mother? Your responsibility to a child is by virtue of the fact that you procreated them and irrespective of your relationship with the other parent.
What im hearing is zero accountability, zero decrement and no self control. You don’t just suddenly have 4 kids with 3/4 different men. The common denominator in this scenario seems to be her if im honest. Theres soo much that shes probably leaving out of the story so she can seem like the victim. An all too familiar story within our community.
Sadly, there is so much I'm leaving out that would make a lot of people sick. I'm home from an upbringing where it is weak to cry and be seen as a victim, so you are wrong on many levels.... and 4 kids (5 now) for 3 men over 22 years, is not suddenly. It was a choice that you seem to think I'm moaning about... again, you're wrong!
The fact that she stayed with a man who covered her in bruises is crucial. Tasha also remarked on not understanding why things where happening instead of removing herself from toxic behaviour. Fighting for a relationship with a man who repeatedly lied and was having unprotected relations with multiple partners putting her health at risk, her rationalisation made me feel ill. I wonder how she would advise her own daughter if it had been her child telling this story.
Shaz I was 22 which is 17yrs ago when I went through domestic violence... I gave a whole background, from me growing up in care... it wasn't as simple as staying, otherwise it wouldn't have taken my son's grandmother to help me. My daughter's Dad for the last 8 years, I haven't been with, we've only recently tried to make it work over the last year and it's not working as you can hear but I don't have children to not try when the father has asked to. I'm hearing a lot of people thinking we should be selfish but where putting your children's happiness first. I really don't see what is wrong with that and I'll just have to disagree
@@transparencywithfire1195 Hi Tasha, I hope that you are well. Putting a child's happiness first starts before they are born by using discernment in choosing a partner who is: providing for himself successfully; treats you well; is consistent; keeps friends with good values, has a plan in place for the future. Choosing a man with a history of lying and degeneracy plus multiple baby mama seems reckless, so yes we disagree - From the10th child of a Jamaican father, learning from the past & creating a better future.
@@transparencywithfire1195Hi Tasha. I wish you all the best but sis, you have got to do better. The role model you have chosen for your children can only respectfully be described as ‘detrimental’. How you can continue to make excuses for this ‘men’ is incredulous. You can make all the justifications you want but if l was to ask you, ‘when you were a young girl and you envisioned your future family, what would your husband be like’- l promise you that you would not describe this imbecile of a human being. I hope you find your strength to move on and show your children a better example.
This is a respectful discourse between women. I applaud you both; each of you could have taken offense and came strong, but you didn't! I respect that a lot ladies. ❤🖤
And I a single father with sole custody of my son for the last 6 years with no help from his mother at all and he's now a well mannered adult so you need to respect yourself and just leave and if he doesn't want a relationship with the children then that's on him
All this just to say you have a man! Who you’re not in love with😳 I don’t get why your STILL there Sis the pathway out is SELF LOVE! It’s ok to be by yourself ❤
In all honesty. I am not going to defend your intake on it. Essentially, it was his idea for me to do the show, but I'm not good at hiding the truth and being dishonest. It's one of the first things I said to the host. But doing this show was very freeing, yes, very public, but I think that was needed to. I said things, I didn't even realise I felt. So, it was a blessing
Really good gripping episode, but why is she moaning? She knew from the first passa, if you are with a Jamaican man. BD4, You are the main, you are NOT exclusive. AND still carried on with him to have a second child. The problem in this country, is child maintenance is not strong enough. It should be compulsory men pay for each child, if they are not married to the mother. Automatic deduction from their wage.
Oh sorry... it got edited out where I explained that when I finally spoke to him, he was just of Jamaican heritage.. he's English, hasn't even visited Jamaica, extremely well spoken and educated... believe me, many people who have met him, get confused when they learn what he's done... but it wasn't him alone that worked on convincing, we had a whole family gathering where parents spoke, apologies where made and all sorts. It's not as simple as he said sorry... there was a lot of stuff in between.. but we went over time talking about some of the other stuff
@@transparencywithfire1195 it would have been great, if maybe the whole story was told but in two parts. (Riddler can restrict his show to 45 minutes and not be so pressured to find a story for next week.) From he slept with the Russian girl, that would have been the red sea for most women to bounce. Why stay and show your baby girls it's ok for a relationship to have outside babies. I get wanting to keep the family together, but there is also mental and emotional peace.
@ldn876 thank you for asking... this is what more people would benefit from doing. Our daughter is 5 and the one after is 1. There was a break, a lot of work and families coming together. My partner is severely damaged and since has reached out to many men for help and family members on both sides for help. I strongly believe charity begins at home. What people do not know is I've worked in many social care settings and where I have time and understanding for other people and families, I will be damned if I don't find the time and energy for my own.
4 kids and not a single proposal in this wild ass story! She’s good… on Jah, I’ll never carry the seed of someone who doesn’t see a solid future and family with ME….craziness
@@transparencywithfire1195 with all due respect, you neglected to add that in and based on your account of your relationships, unless it was your first partner, any proposal would have been void with the trash behaviour you experienced and apparently still experience….each to their own though
@RR-jp5kb I'm sure you have intellegence to realise you can't fit 4 relationships over 22 years in 2.5 hours that have been edited to 1.5 hours. And it was my first partner who I was with for 5 years and my 2nd whom I was with for 4 years. I'm not sure what your situation is but good luck to you. I love being a mother, it's the best choices I've made... but people with your mindset would have a person living in abuse and marrying for status
@@transparencywithfire1195 argue with yourself, your defensiveness tells myself and everyone in the comments our thoughts on the situation are valid…..and thanks for your “good luck” wishes, I’m getting married to an amazing man in September….someone who will be a great role model to our future kids
My input is we as women are carrying the men and inable this kind of behaviour. And way way back in slavery this type of trifling behaviour was expected . But the blood is to close between half brothers and sisters. Also, all this mix-up is so sad and uncalled for. I am an African Jamaican black British. I come from the same background, having a lot of half brothers and sisters. I am not sure if there's more half brothers and sisters outside of the family. But we women have mental health problems with these types of men they are so messy. And it's men ego that plays a big part in having a football team of babies and more. May many blessings go with you 🙏 and your children 🙏. We women are born strong soldiers.
Wtf I’ve just listened to all of this for to still be with this man! Kmt she think the church family will fix him smh she don’t understand that she still has a broken home. She thinks a broken home is just an absent father.
This is a heartbreaking story because Tasha doesn't even realise her own significant vulnerabilities that have led her to be not just susceptible to dysfunction but also a willing participant. What is clear is that using the 'keeping a family together' narrative is how she rationalises her decision to remain in the relationship because it gives her validation. The internalised misogyny was difficult to hear, blaming women who don't owe her anything and making excuses for a man who made conscious choices to cheat with over 50 women. Furthermore she can 'understand' that her 4th BD has traumas that impact his behaviour but does not extend such grace to any of the women that he manipulated, especially the one who was 10 years younger than him. Age gaps like that are often associated with men who are predators because what does he have in common with someone 10 years younger and it was disturbing that he justified cheating with this young girl by saying 'she was on me' as if he was powerless in that situation. Tasha you don't see that you are a victim because your metric of what a victim is, is skewed. A victim is not synonymous with someone helpless and unable to function. For example, you described a scenario where one of your BD did not want to use condoms when you did and you eventually succumbed. That is coercion and coercion is sexual assault. You have had a lot of loss in your family and that must be incredibly difficult. I hope you find a therapist you connect with and can begin to address the patterns you have repeated. I see you are in a helping profession and I am sure you know that children fare better with 2 happy separated parents that those that remain in dysfunction. A man who disappears for 2 months and threatens to leave his children's lives is NOT a family man, he is for the streets. You are teaching your children that abuse and love can coexist and that abuse is justified if you have trauma. Abuse is not only physical, please educate yourself so you can teach your children to break the pattern of generational trauma.
Hi, wow. I must really express how much I appreciate your message. Not all of it is accurate, as I was only able to come on and tell my story because of the work I've done and the strength I've gained.... but I do not know it all, so it is always helpful when someone is giving helpful insight and knowledgeable insight from another perspective. Some of the things you have said, I have said myself. Shortly after doing this podcast, he has stopped seeing and contacting the kids.. which I've always know would come to this and I didn't have time to explain, my preparation for this. One thing is... which no amount of therapy will be able to stop, is that there are new and ways of deceiving people, you've just got to be able to change how you allow it to affect you.... I knew what I was deciding to tolerate a long time after I realised his abuse. I really wish I had more time to explain this in detail... but again, massive thank you for your knowledge and insight xxx
Half way through and I can honestly say she needs a hug and a therapist. Also doesn’t like Jamaican men because they’re frivolous with children and different women but has 3 herself! Regardless she needs a hug
Hey, thank you... I'm not sure if your Jamaican, I think you might be, so it's only right that I apologise... this comment was cut down cause I did give it more context and I did say some in a certain generation. I have 4 children. It was lnt the amount of children... it was about them being scattered around and of the same age... anyway. I'm very well and a hug is not what I need.. bless you... but again, I apologise if I caused offence, as I thought that would as I was saying it.
@@transparencywithfire1195 noooooo don’t apologise to me at all you’re allowed your preference just thought the reasoning was wild at the time. I still haven’t finished watching as it’s difficult to watch someone who seems so nice be abused. May I ask if you’ve reported to the police? I know I haven’t finished but I do hope and pray you have.
@TGTBTUPoddy thank you. It was a very long time ago. Around 17years now. He really needed help at first but in the time we were together, the police was called to help remove him. I found it amazing that it had me emotional, but then I realised, I never give that part of my life a second thought. I tend to leave things and move on
These are the things thar make me glad I'm single with 1 baby daddy to coparent with. I really think this is a confidence thing. Women, especially black women, really need confidence.
Power of letting go is a real thing u need to let that man go your doing to much yourself and your allowing to much. Self love is needed in this situation. You make excuses don’t matter who u get taught by you know what’s right from wrong your allowing and enabling his behaviour sis
She has no idea of the damage that she is doing to her children. She made incredible mistakes and now she's trying to make it right. Her brokenness has made her accept his behavior. Those kids will find each other when they are grown. Ridiculous.
You need to also take your side of responsibility. Women who are with 'toxic' men look past all the red flags because either their attracted to his behaviour or they just don't want to be single
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 if you’ve never been in a situation like mine you’ve no place to judge.im aware of what happened and now seeking therapy.in my case I was in a relationship scam so yes I was trapped and lied to
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 grew up in an abusive household didn’t know what right relationships are I’m now in a very loving one after being single so please don’t judge what you don’t know
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 I now work a very well paid job have my own car and house and raising four kids at the same time so I’m doing well since I got out from a narcissist relationship
Ladies, always remember your child's father's family will ALWAYS support them over you. Never seek their advice regarding your relationship 8 times out of 10 they will only tell you what's best for him. The woman seems so lovely, gutted that she is still with this man. I hope sooner then later she realises deserves better then this and shows him the door. I know she's not naive and falling for his tricks. I think she's keeping him to have a family unit, how it looks to her family etc. My personal opinion NEVER take back a man who cheats, there will be the occasional few who actually redeem themselves, but the rest of them see you as nothing and will do it over and over. He doesn't care about your physical or mental health. The extent BF3 was cheating he definitely has issues, an addiction, low self esteem, unfulfilled in life (life generally) or never really got women...something. But really deep it would you want a man or disrespect yourself for a man with these issues, let alone the sh*t he's out you through. I pray God guides this woman towar
Don't allow baby dad number 4's mum get into your head! Your dad taught you the right way and don't abandon your values for someone who don't have values in terms of accepting cheating and lying behaviour.
Don't worry, I didn't... thank you. His mother and I, haven't had a relationship in a long time and those comments led to a big, endless conflict.. that saw the end of our communication
You cant create life on empty promises. Make sure that your foundations are laid before accepting to bring life with anyone. Anything that happens more than once is accountability not an accident
Someone show me where I didn't take accountability on all 3 relationships.. don't try and find things that are not true. Or would you like me to point out where I took accountability because obviously some of you are dying to make up some issues with what I have said... I am here and open, so go ahead
We're not firing shots.....I do want to point out where you stated that your experience should be some kind of warning to women.....I've asked my 11 year old daughter to watch this as an example of how not to lack judgement in life particularly in relation to choosing the right mate and bringing life into this existence.....
She is a very strong woman. But she is not looking after her children’s mental and emotional well-being by staying in these dysfunctional relationships. She demonstrates that she is not looking after her own mental and emotional well-being because she was never taught how. My guess is, she came from a very troubled home- her father may have had all of his children all by one woman but what was the quality of his relationship with that woman? I suspect that she has a history of childhood mental and emotional challenges that she hasn’t attended to. Unless she engages in a healing journey’ this trauma filled cycle will continue. The therapy she had- I wonder whether it got her to address the behavioural effects that past abuses had on her mental and emotional health- and I mean childhood/teenage challenges/abuses. These are the foundations of where the problems are occurring, not the troubled men she decided to engage with. These choices are as a result of her unresolved traumas.
This episode was like some Love & Hip Hop madness but unfortunately its her reality. I hope she too gets the threapy she needs because continuing to choose men that don't respect you, insist on unprotected sex & have no morals is WILD! And yes you can say they need help, but sis you're not a therapist let them GO and stay blessed ❤
Hey, thank you for your kind words. Fortunately for me, I am a qualified counsellor but I've also been a health and social care worker for many years, where I've worked in rehabilitation centres, young people's homes, care homes, etc. It's in me to try and understand and help where I can. I won't change that because we are who we are... but I am very glad that I found my way out of the DV situation when I was in my early 20s xxx
Lovely sweet girl clearly very fertile. Hard to switch off even though it was like watching a car crash in some parts. Stay strong and in a career people❤
Me too - no way - had two by 23 unless l was married no more - and l kept it that way as my second baby dad was soooo abusive- and his family supported his nonsense! I’m free now and have nothing to do with the family - Men - some are a sick !!
Originally from Hackney, A childhood former friend has 7 kids from 5 women. All of them are decent looking to once attractive, non of them had kids before. My former friend is about 5ft 8". Never been reliable, never held a job for any amount of time, was even lazy at selling drugs. Was always lying, got me into trouble and dumb situations in my younger years. Owes me money. He would try and talk to any girl all the time, on the street or in his car, in my car, it was annoying. I don't have any kids, I'm gonna be 40 this year. Alot of men believe this high value man nonsense. They watch these Red pill content. They believe you must become real, then show your worth to a woman. Truth is you have to sell the DREAM to women and cover up any red flags about yourself with LIES. The type of men that struggle with women are probably not playing the GAME, aka telling lies to get what you want. That is the real GAME. I have learnt from real life and not the internet.
This was really hard to watch 😢 this lady seems to have a good heart but with a good heart you need a high level of discernment as people will take advantage of your kind nature. She seems to use a lot of her energy helping others but who is pouring into her and helping her become a better and happier version of herself? She seems to be forgetting that her peace and progression is far more important and a higher priority than her partner’s. Relationships are obviously give and take but her partner’s seem to be doing a lot of taking and not a lot of giving. I’ve read the comments and I understand that she wants to keep a family unit but is normalising the last bf’s behaviour most beneficial in the long run? Would she be happy if her daughters were to go on and also have relationships like this? I really hope one day that she can show a healthy example of relationships and marriage to her kids like her parents did for her. Babe please don’t feel guilty to leave that man behind to find someone who is as nurturing and understanding as you have been to these men, you honestly deserve someone who would never cheat on you as bare minimum ❤ A man who doesn’t want to be a parent unless he’s in a relationship with you and can reap your emotional benefits is a waste of space
Bless you sis… you’re really trying to heal this man… rather then heal yourself 😢 You got too comfortable with bad behaviour… you seem to be desperately rationalising this mess… you are sadly teaching your children the generational trauma of poor relationships continues 😭 I am sending you more love and power sis… I see your intentions.. . But you gotta no when to stop…
Women have no accountability. You do not get an endless supply of good men especially after you’ve had a child and especially after you continue to choose poorly and then get pregnant over and over again. It’s over for her now in terms of long term serious relationships. I just hope she does right by those children and learns to figure out herself in the process.
@@jasonvoorhies6431 I think this statement is so blanket term because it's not a thing you would desire so therefore every man is the same. What I can say is that you can tell she has trauma from somewhere and that she has made decisions and met people from her place of self worth and that's caused her to have these situations. Two people are at play so both people need to be held to a standard which will never be the case as the woman is always at fault in everything. Now to say she's never to have a longer term relationship. You can't say for sure that she never will because there is always someone out there who will love your cracks and somehow nourish you whole. It happens. The likely hood of that being around the circle she's in, is lower though because not in a rude way but you can mind if see where everyone's mind is at. Single mothers everywhere and fathers just having the baby and running. When I used to live with my grandma in the ghetto in Kilburn I never stayed in the area. I always made sure to met my friends in other areas not because I am better than anyone but you end up having the same mindset as everyone else and what's around you becomes normal and I didn't want that for myself. I was married at 20 but divorced and I remarried again and I had no issues at all finding me that were willing to be with me and my children but it was for me to decide if they were really ready to take that step with me and my precious babies. So I was very picky and now my husband is a father to those children you'd not even know they aren't his. Sadly we have some drama from their father because of me moving on and he wants ti hurt me by using those poor children. Ugh. It is incredibly important that both woman and man be careful who they lay with and have ling term commitment as the goal before children. What's sad is that so many of us humans are walking around with childhood wounds that aren't addressed and then we have children. Not everyone is smart and aware enough to change because it's scary and painful and it takes a life time of conscious effort to do better. Our communitkes need to take mental health and emotional health as a whole more seriously for us to heal because we'll end up hurting each other always. It's so extremely sad.
@@jayo3074 men like to reveal the madness once in their mind your trapped through pregnancy or marriagde. A lot of hate for real responsibility and when it's not ALL about them anymore.
@@sinceresong9907 yeah I don't believe this myth sorry. Women know exactly what kind of men they are dealing with before they get pregnant or married. And what benefit does a guy have in "baby trapping" a woman? It's women who decide to give birth not men 😂
This is what happens when you love man too much chaii. Why are you making these reckless decisions at this age and still continuing to be with someone who is absolutely toxic and can’t keep it in his pants…. What a pity
She seems like a lovely lady but what you just said is the harsh truth. Everyone just sympathising but not understanding, at some point she needs to take accountability for her reckless decisions. Why she giving all these men babies aswell. We have to do better
This woman needs to put her children first. History will end up repeating itself. Her son growing up seeing his mother accept this behaviour and daughters also growing up to think men like this are acceptable. Have some self respect, heal, love yourself and leave all this madness for the sake of your children. The Russian woman is the only one with sense in all of this . As a woman this episode just upset me, mother's need to do better or use contraception. I dont want to hear you play victim and blame everyone else but the man you chose to keep laying next too is the one you have every excuse for . Sorry but I'm sure your dad would agree this is pure foolishness
Morning. Some of the things you say is very triggering but I see it's not coming from a bad place. I get a little defensive when people mention my dad... but where you're concerned, you haven't been cruel and I can't argue with facts, my Dad would be disgusted. Where my son is concerned though, please don't. He'd be quite annoyed at this comment, cause he never saw or knew of anything until he was told about it years after it had ended.... but thank you for your advice x
@@transparencywithfire1195I’m sorry, but listening to your narrative of some of these scenarios is slightly childish. The fact that you can tell your story means you’ve got over most of what happened. I honestly want to hug you because all this compassion you have for these men is not needed. This 4th BD, based on your description, appears to be a struggle love situation. How are you honestly judging this young girl and her choices is baffling? He’s probably manipulating both of you. But how old is this young girl? Is she 29 or 25? I’m so sorry about your little sister; hearing you had to watch the video was heartbreaking. My advice is don’t take any more of this situation; you can’t keep something together at the detriment of your mental health, but all the best if you decide to stay.
@krissib3394 thank you and I will tell you that I left shortly after this video... I would have and was explaining that it was going that way but I needed to do things amicably. I do judge this girls because what she has done and continues to do, is uncalled for and sick... it's got nothing to do with him. Why trouble me and my family But thank you for your kind words x
There's a clear correlation here. She attracts damaged people and she is patient attempts to work through their floors. So she thinks she's being a good person but she's just endangering herself. It's a similar storyline each time but with a different execution. I genuinely pray for her and hope thay she seeks help x
Misplaced attention. Imagine having so much vim for the young woman. That other woman is young and may not know better, yet she is still here with the man. Who knows what he's feeding the other one because she now has 2 babies with him also. They are in the same boat essentially but Tasha has age on her side and should know better. Sad
Hats off to you Tash. Sounds you’ve gone through it with a lot of loss and raising your kids as best you can. These men are wild and we want to keep our families together and accept our men for who they are and trying not to change them but take accountability for their actions. 100% try and help but don’t lose yourself. ❤❤
I have had a good few field days reading your comments and I couldn't respond to all. I've read that I need therapy a few times... not just any therapy... real therapy, lol. I've read that I am damaged beyond repair... that one made me laugh, I have to be honest, sorry. I heard I have to love myself and learn, etc. Now, let me attempt to help some of you, cause in all honesty, I've been touched by some of your kind words, seen a different point of view from some of you, sickened by some and find some of you destructive and mental. Firstly... Falling into depression and being sad over the loss of my family members is not drama or abnormal... so deal with your mind frames on that one. 2nd - my children are very happy. They thrive in the highest groups at school, attend many private classes, performed in West end theatres, and are extremely talented. I do not struggle, I do not find it hard. We are a family that loves children and that's what I know. I have fun with mine whilst raising them. They are advanced and I am not run down! I do not hold any of my children's father accountable for ME having MY children, I wanted all of them and all but the 2nd was planned but she (now 8 years old) is an amazing blessing. My partner has been a father to her since she was a baby. 3rd - if you think that a man or woman cheating on you should cause you a pain that damages you forever, then you are the one who needs the therapy... I cry and I get over things and move on, that is life... I'm sorry if the fact that I can function after all my lose, offends some of you, but that is a YOU problem, that YOU should seek to find help for. I've done the work on dealing with my grief. The relationships, have no lasting bearings on my heart or soul... so deal with your own minds with that! I am well educated, work, continue to study, not overcome by bitterness... some of you would do well to understand what kind of strength and love for yourself that takes. If my life angers you... like I said... that is a YOU problem. Though I do apologise about how I feel about the young Jamican generation of men. I tried to explain and be as respectful as possible.
I don’t usually comment or give advice to strangers on the internet. I respect and understand everything you’ve said, but you are still with the 4th guy, giving him everything he needs in life, a loving women. You need to leave him for your own sanity. Whilst you’re still young and able.
@mk1-ij3h thank you. I appreciate the advice. I was trying to explain that I am in the process of trying to forgive and failing... which is very highlighted in my words... but I completely understand why many feel this way. My priority has always been, trying for the kids. X
@@transparencywithfire1195 I hear you, and can definitely see that it comes from a place of love and understanding and can tell your a top mother and loving person (im currently watching your yt vids as I type). I guess just try not to forget that you’re doing the person a MASSIVE favour, we can forgive but don’t forget. And most of all don’t get played. An that’s coming from a man. I’m 28.
@@Kington357 deep breaths for you... I have no time. If there was more time and I was more factual, people would think I was really mad for trying to keep my family together. Everything is falling into place nicely since I've done this interview... so thank you
It doesn't appear that there is one. The message is still take whatever is thrown at you in the name of saving your family because shes still with him... SMH
I think before you teach anyone or trying to help anyone I think you need to do more work on self before helping others. I’ve been there I’ve been through it but our response to how we have handles a situation has been totally different. Sending you my love sis hope it all gets better x
My Daughter's father got another woman pg and lied about me. We split and i made a vow not to get together with another man until my daughter turned 18. So for 15 years I stayed very single. Then when she was 18 and a few months, a mutual friend introduced me to my wonderful Man. I feel he was so worth waiting for. Thats my personal story but i'm glad I waited.
Please remember to keep comments respectful and to follow our community guidelines. Thank you for Watching please don’t forget to subscribe ✋🏾
Can I just say you conducted this interview with utmost professionalism and empathy..I see you bit your tongue in some parts but you were respectful and allowed her to talk and express herself..kudos to you sir.
I’m 31 single with no kids atm in time. This podcast continues to remind me HARSHLY that I need to find the RIGHT WOMAN. The sleeping aroundvting has to get LOCKED OFF! All this headache with baby mothers is TOO MUCH 😵💫😵💫😭😭🤣
💯
God bless you Bro. I pray you find a good one.
Trust me be careful the wrong woman would falsely accuse you and be quick to put you on child maintenance. They would hate you and desperately want your money
Put God 1st and God will bring your significant other your way. Blessings brotha.
Trust me as an older woman with sons that’s the best decision you can make - and take your time and choose wisely- my son has 1 mother of his children and they had two children together- she had a bad upbringing and she is a nightmare for my son - so choose very wisely! And they are not together anymore - thank god !!
I think as women, we have to exercise more discernment and self control.
The first baby father didn’t seem too bad in comparison and each relationship seemed to get progressively worse. What impact did that have on the children.
God know sometimes my husband gets on my nerves. But hearing these types of situation, I give thanks. Truly
💯
100% the pookies from our community are unfortunately here because of dusty black men and desperate black women who refuse to be alone.
That’s what happens we women think the grass is greener on the other side
This happens when you have unresolved childhood/teenage ‘wounds’ that you haven’t healed from.
Your vision is blinkered- you make choices that only temporarily massage your wounds.
The Universe doesn’t give us the people that we want, the Universe gives us the people that we need- these people teach us painful lessons about where we are in our ‘growth’ in life. They expose our lack of self love.
And we either sink- become victims to our challenges with them or we swim, and become victors to them by starting our‘healing journey’- going for therapy, dealing with the effects of past abuses, beginning self development courses etc.
This way ‘every mistake will be a blessing’.
She should of tried more, with the first one
Sis. You’ve got way too much compassion for these men and not enough for yourself and your children. Babydad 4 is absolutely wilddddddd. To still be with this man is absurd. What example are you setting for your daughters.
I think people in general need to be mindful when they are making assumptions about children. Based on a tiny snippet of what you have watched, the talk about how well my children do was talked about and edited... but that doesn't matter because you have nothing to go off to make such an assumption. My children come first, in love, opportunities, growth, finances, etc, You assume I have no compassion for myself because you are not hearing me talk about my achievements or my growth from all of this... but where my children are concerned, I would ask people not to be so disrespectful with their assumptions..
@@transparencywithfire1195 fair enough
@@transparencywithfire1195 I think you were indirectly blaming the other baby mama for getting pregnant and her mother for advising her to be in a relationship with this man. The point is the man is equally responsible for creating a baby and being in contact with her. If you have unprotected sex the chances are a baby will come. Both mother and father are equally responsible. Also you do not know what conversation he had with her or what he told her about you. All of these other women are victims too and if they remain in this situation then they are willing victims. He (#4) is an irresponsible man and lacks integrity. Regardless of what his background/childhood experience was he is now a man and can make choices. Imagine being raped as a child and raping other children using the excuse that I am damaged because this happened to me. Please stop making excuses for him and consider the impact his behaviour will have on all of your children plus his other kids. He does not need to be in any relationship right now but undergoing extensive therapy and learning to take responsibility. He is either broken or damaged and not healthy for children to see as a role model. What about the influence of his mother on your daughters? Please protect your children. You seem like a great person with lots of compassion. I wish all parties involved healing and trust that he gets the help he needs.
I read somewhere that women emotionally stay the age that they are when they had their first child. I won’t be surprised if this was true. 😴
She has 10% chance on the dating market 3 baby fathers what logical man would wife her she should have kept her legs closed
This woman needs to love herself first, you cannot find love in others if you don't love yourself FIRST.
Love will come later but depending how old u are u can't just keep playing around
There's alot of built-up trauma here
I applaud her for all she's been through and still remaining strong but respectfully she seems a lil naive healing is needed here (respectfully).
I agree with you..the advice she is giving women..she is not taking it. Whilst her BF's mum says what she says about men..she is not saying it but demonstrating..kids tend to follow what they are as opposye to what they are told
She put herself through it sorry
She definitely wont see it, but she is both attracting and allowing such behavior. Explaining, justifying the situation wont change anything. Healing and self love is the way, and without that a pattern of toxic relationships will continue.
💯💯💯
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
💯 she needs therapy. The kids probably do too
It's funny the way the world works... with the little I've told everyone seems to think that it's my sexual relationship choices that I need healing from... wow. From loosing my parent, ypungest sister, cousins and friends in such sudden and painful ways... you all focus on the stupidity of the male actions in my life. The world we live in, is a confused one.
@@transparencywithfire1195 both can be true. That healing is needed for your grief and romantic relationships. From what you said in this video, both caused significant trauma
Respect to any woman with 4 kids. But just because someone can justify why they are the way they are, doesn’t mean you need to deal with it in your life. It doesn’t matter how many kids you have with how many men, doesn’t mean you need to put up with disrespect and cheating. Especially if you have young girls watching you. Self respect over everything.
Facts
He’s also never gonna change because he knows she’ll take it.
Real talk 👏🏾
Well said!
She only has 3, she said 4 because she had a miscariage
This literally drained my energy. Low self esteem often looks for a project to relieve its symptoms and I believe this is the case in this story. Very sad that beautiful, intelligent ladies get caught up in this cycle.
Such a sad story, not braking a cycle. I think she is vulnerable person! Poor children they are the ones who are suffering 😢
She said they are not intimate at the moment and in the same breath said this SAME man who’s been moving the WILDEST is not sleeping with anybody else. And she said it in all seriousness.
Women… we gotta do better, man. This is sad.
I’m not sure why this kind of content popped up for me but I watched it to the end and I’m shocked.
Sad. From start to finish. Ladies always remember to love yourself first above everything 😢
8:18 - WOW! One of the most powerful questions I have heard of late. Her abuser curled up in a ball asking why she lets him do that to her. There’s the money shot right there! Abusers need help and we as people need to help them.
How do we help them? By not tolerating their bull for any length of time even if it means leaving them. That’s kindness. You help them and ultimately yourself.
Nonsense. That's just part of her biased story that you found compelling.
My dad was with my mum for years, and he did not cheat he is an amazing man there is no excuses for bad behaviour. We have to be accountable for our own bad choices that we make in our life
Your mum was lucky that your dad was the same man he pertained to be before and after they had you. It’s not always about taking accountability for your choices it’s about taking responsibility for your decisions which she is.
This sounds like struggle love! As women, If we know our worth, core values, beliefs and life goals we will attract and choose to put ourselves and our needs first.
She has most definitely been vulnerable especially during the times of loss and grief. We cant change how other people behave, only they can make a conscious choice to do that.
We can only change our own patterns of behavior. History has a habit of repeating itself so the intergenerational trauma may show up in the children.
Now she is choosing to teach him how to be a father&patner like hes her son . I really do wish this beautiful queen the best and i hope that she continues her journey to healing 💕
What a beautiful soul ❤that deserves so much more love , empathy and kindness to heal broken wounds. Pure warrior .
I got a little confused with the back stories that seemed to have nothing to do with the 'baby father' story. Seems like she has a lot of drama or trauma in her life. Therapy is needed.
HI, yes, it was very confusing doing the interview as I was coming to share one part of my life, which is the current part, this is over 22 years, and I was answering questions. The interview took 2.5 hours and I haven't watched the edits, but I do speak about my having a lot of therapy. the back story is related to the questions I was asked and to each relationship at the time
This is so disappointing to watch.
@@motionalvoicesno need to explain yourself. You are not in charge of editing and such sensitive interviews are not
easy. You are only human! Keep it up! All the best to your and your family! God bless!
Sometimes it's better for peace of mind to give up and do the self work. Our children deserve it.
She’s telling her story so she can tell it how she wants those things that might seem irrelevant to you might not be to her and it paints a picture of the audience about where she is coming from and her experiences you can’t tell her story any better than her.
A lot of men really need to raise the bar and stop sleeping around with no thought for the impact on the children and their mothers. It is a shame and what does it teach children about responsibility.
💯👌🏾
I can’t sympathise for her because after ALL THAT she’s STILL with the guy and still has not learned from past relationship experiences. Then his mum is just there manipulating her saying “all men cheat, it’s normal” and to install those same views to her daughter to repeat generational trauma. Also the guy just gaslighting with fake tears. How disappointing.
How are you supposed to heal and grow into a better person? What about focusing on other things like career aspirations?
Wasting time on low-vibrational and broken men, fighting other women over a guy who doesn’t care.
Sorry... I am definitely not in need of anyone sympathising with me. I am certainly not fighting with other women... how you heard that is beyond me.... no one is wasting time on anything! What story did you listen to?
Do you know what I do and what qualifications I have or do you think I sit on my bum on benefits. You need to not make up stuff in your head that hasn't been spoken about
@@transparencywithfire1195 Watched the whole podcast and that’s what the result was. It IS a waste of your time communicating with various side pieces and STILL proceeding to do more with the guy after all that evidence. The interviewer asked you towards the end of the podcast why after all of this, you went back to him and then you tried to justify his behaviour to make it seem as if he’s also a victim, trying to save him.
That’s is a toxic and vicious cycle. He also further threatened to walk out of his kids life AGAIN, if you chose to be with another man. Again, keeping you in the fist of his hands to continue boosting his ego. Is that not a waste of time?
The positive thing about this is that hopefully your story can educate young women to not fall into this in the future.
@@melaninmel9213 yh I think you missed the whole part of me saying I believe in trying to keep the family together, us not being intimate and me trying but it's hard... it's not the best interview so I get it... but it's very rushed. I don't disagree with you. I just don't understand how anyone can see their children long for a parent and not try give them what they want. It's why I respect that my eldest daughters father stayed away, because she didn't go through that with him. My heart is not like this men as you may assume. I explain, it's exactly how I am with everyone. I don't like to see hurt and I forgive
@@transparencywithfire1195 I haven’t missed the bit where you said you are a firm believer of keeping the family together, but it’s not a healthy environment for everyone involved. Yes, ideally it would be nice to keep the family together to break the stigma of children being in a single parent household/having an absent parent, IF the situation was healthy and both parents are able to co-parent. But this guy’s intentions does not benefit anyone but himself based on what is being said in this interview and the things he say is a way of trapping your own freedom. So why should anyone continue to suffer at the price of others? That’s what I believe is the case here
@melaninmel9213 girl, you can't reason with unhealed people. She's convinced herself that her choices are justified, so let her get on with it. The only ones who suffer are the kids at the end of the day. 🙏🏾
Sometimes the gentliest people attract the wrong people ,because they give up too much love and dont believe they deserve the love themselves
One word :BOUNDARIES
It’s so important for women as well as men to recognise abusive behaviour in its mildest forms to prevent these toxic relationships. This comes from high self esteem, confidence and discipline to leave what is not for you and your children if you have them. As parents you owe it to your children to make wise life choices wherever possible.
This is the saddest thing ever
My dear this is nothing - some women go through worst - that’s why they say wait for the right partner or marriage!
I think she needs healing she’s been through a lot , I hope things get better for her .
You think?! 100% hope she seeks help heal
There all a bunch of narcissists, and unfortunately this lady seems like a healer and attracts broken people. She has immense strength, but girl if you run with you catch fleas. Your kids deserve peace as well as you!
It’s easy to see something clearly from the outside in. Sometimes you don’t see the wood for the trees when you’re in a situation. No one who is decent deserves to be ill treated or disrespected. If a man doesn’t want to commit then that is a huge red flag to move on. Dont make babies with non committed partners. She sounds very honest and intelligent. She deserves to allow herself to heal, know exactly what she wants and stay focused on it. She needs to stay well clear of those that do not show her respect.
Woman pls try and pick right .because having a child is no joke and having drama baby daddies makes it worse
I think it’s not about picking the right people.
I think it’s about healing the wounds of your childhood/teenage years- then you will attract better people into your life, you will ‘see’ clearer and you will not allow yourself to remain in dysfunctional relationships as your self awareness and self love will be developing.
A man will talk women into having children to have access to them for life. Do not fall for it! If they’re talking about babies, why not marriage?
Most " moden " women couldn't pick a cold day in winter let alone a decent man to have children /relationship with...!😮
Biggest mistake you can make is having your extended family all up in your business
Interesting. Before the welfare, family lived closer and were their own safety network. Since the welfare state families are seen as problematic as welfare is the road to freedom. I think depending on the family there may be things of benefit.
Very clear shes a warm soul. Kind spirit.
Sum peoole are predators and see they think is weakness n cause harm rather then protection.
😂😂😂kind spirit you know her personally yeah
😂🤭😂nonsense
@@mrurban6007 everyone's got gud n bad in them. We go off face value when watching these tings online.
Just an observation. Not law,/facts
So even if it's a fake story you would still believe it because of face value🤔interested
Self love is free.
Your 4th one was bread crumbing you . I'm glad u shared your story. Your insight has shown women like me that self love is key & boundaries is the only way to be safe and sane in life
I will keep it respectful and just say this. After seeing the card in the first instance that should have been enough. Anything after that is self-inflicted. A leopard doesn't change its spots, it just looks for the next pray, and the next and the next.......... He won't change. The young lady needs to accept accountability which I am not hearing.
Such a brave women telling her story, that must take a lot to do that xx
The final baby dad is so toxic... If he's only in the kids life if you're together, please put yourself first
Typical, blame the man
@@time4advancement244 He is toxic. Who refuses to be in a child's life because they are not with the mother? Your responsibility to a child is by virtue of the fact that you procreated them and irrespective of your relationship with the other parent.
Yes and when he's threatening to leave her and his daughter it's emotionally abusive smh
What im hearing is zero accountability, zero decrement and no self control.
You don’t just suddenly have 4 kids with 3/4 different men. The common denominator in this scenario seems to be her if im honest.
Theres soo much that shes probably leaving out of the story so she can seem like the victim. An all too familiar story within our community.
Exactly!
Sadly, there is so much I'm leaving out that would make a lot of people sick. I'm home from an upbringing where it is weak to cry and be seen as a victim, so you are wrong on many levels.... and 4 kids (5 now) for 3 men over 22 years, is not suddenly. It was a choice that you seem to think I'm moaning about... again, you're wrong!
The fact that she stayed with a man who covered her in bruises is crucial. Tasha also remarked on not understanding why things where happening instead of removing herself from toxic behaviour. Fighting for a relationship with a man who repeatedly lied and was having unprotected relations with multiple partners putting her health at risk, her rationalisation made me feel ill. I wonder how she would advise her own daughter if it had been her child telling this story.
Shaz I was 22 which is 17yrs ago when I went through domestic violence... I gave a whole background, from me growing up in care... it wasn't as simple as staying, otherwise it wouldn't have taken my son's grandmother to help me. My daughter's Dad for the last 8 years, I haven't been with, we've only recently tried to make it work over the last year and it's not working as you can hear but I don't have children to not try when the father has asked to. I'm hearing a lot of people thinking we should be selfish but where putting your children's happiness first. I really don't see what is wrong with that and I'll just have to disagree
@@transparencywithfire1195 Hi Tasha, I hope that you are well. Putting a child's happiness first starts before they are born by using discernment in choosing a partner who is: providing for himself successfully; treats you well; is consistent; keeps friends with good values, has a plan in place for the future. Choosing a man with a history of lying and degeneracy plus multiple baby mama seems reckless, so yes we disagree - From the10th child of a Jamaican father, learning from the past & creating a better future.
@@transparencywithfire1195Hi Tasha. I wish you all the best but sis, you have got to do better. The role model you have chosen for your children can only respectfully be described as ‘detrimental’.
How you can continue to make excuses for this ‘men’ is incredulous. You can make all the justifications you want but if l was to ask you, ‘when you were a young girl and you envisioned your future family, what would your husband be like’- l promise you that you would not describe this imbecile of a human being.
I hope you find your strength to move on and show your children a better example.
This is a respectful discourse between women.
I applaud you both; each of you could have taken offense and came strong, but you didn't!
I respect that a lot ladies. ❤🖤
This story is wild!!…. Sis needs to learn about healthy relationships, self love , self care and discernment . She needs heal x
When you think your strong someone else shows mad strength! God bless you throughout the rest of your journey through life.
And I a single father with sole custody of my son for the last 6 years with no help from his mother at all and he's now a well mannered adult so you need to respect yourself and just leave and if he doesn't want a relationship with the children then that's on him
💯💯
All this just to say you have a man! Who you’re not in love with😳 I don’t get why your STILL there
Sis the pathway out is SELF LOVE! It’s ok to be by yourself ❤
He essentially lied consistently and had a baby on her... like what does it take to stand up
In all honesty. I am not going to defend your intake on it. Essentially, it was his idea for me to do the show, but I'm not good at hiding the truth and being dishonest. It's one of the first things I said to the host. But doing this show was very freeing, yes, very public, but I think that was needed to. I said things, I didn't even realise I felt. So, it was a blessing
Really good gripping episode, but why is she moaning?
She knew from the first passa, if you are with a Jamaican man. BD4, You are the main, you are NOT exclusive. AND still carried on with him to have a second child.
The problem in this country, is child maintenance is not strong enough.
It should be compulsory men pay for each child, if they are not married to the mother. Automatic deduction from their wage.
I thoughts that's how it was already? I knew they deduct like 33% of a man's wage in the US for child support
@@jayo3074 gosh no. There is an endless amount of men that should be paying child support, but can't be asked. Or go on welfare to avoid paying.
Oh sorry... it got edited out where I explained that when I finally spoke to him, he was just of Jamaican heritage.. he's English, hasn't even visited Jamaica, extremely well spoken and educated... believe me, many people who have met him, get confused when they learn what he's done... but it wasn't him alone that worked on convincing, we had a whole family gathering where parents spoke, apologies where made and all sorts. It's not as simple as he said sorry... there was a lot of stuff in between.. but we went over time talking about some of the other stuff
@@transparencywithfire1195 it would have been great, if maybe the whole story was told but in two parts. (Riddler can restrict his show to 45 minutes and not be so pressured to find a story for next week.)
From he slept with the Russian girl, that would have been the red sea for most women to bounce.
Why stay and show your baby girls it's ok for a relationship to have outside babies.
I get wanting to keep the family together, but there is also mental and emotional peace.
@ldn876 thank you for asking... this is what more people would benefit from doing. Our daughter is 5 and the one after is 1. There was a break, a lot of work and families coming together. My partner is severely damaged and since has reached out to many men for help and family members on both sides for help. I strongly believe charity begins at home. What people do not know is I've worked in many social care settings and where I have time and understanding for other people and families, I will be damned if I don't find the time and energy for my own.
4 kids and not a single proposal in this wild ass story! She’s good… on Jah, I’ll never carry the seed of someone who doesn’t see a solid future and family with ME….craziness
Hmmm cause I said I hadn't been proposed to yh... you're incorrect!
@@transparencywithfire1195 with all due respect, you neglected to add that in and based on your account of your relationships, unless it was your first partner, any proposal would have been void with the trash behaviour you experienced and apparently still experience….each to their own though
@RR-jp5kb I'm sure you have intellegence to realise you can't fit 4 relationships over 22 years in 2.5 hours that have been edited to 1.5 hours. And it was my first partner who I was with for 5 years and my 2nd whom I was with for 4 years. I'm not sure what your situation is but good luck to you. I love being a mother, it's the best choices I've made... but people with your mindset would have a person living in abuse and marrying for status
@@transparencywithfire1195 argue with yourself, your defensiveness tells myself and everyone in the comments our thoughts on the situation are valid…..and thanks for your “good luck” wishes, I’m getting married to an amazing man in September….someone who will be a great role model to our future kids
@@RR-jp5kb but you're on here triggered by someone else's experiences. Congrats.. your focus is noted!
My input is we as women are carrying the men and inable this kind of behaviour. And way way back in slavery this type of trifling behaviour was expected . But the blood is to close between half brothers and sisters. Also, all this mix-up is so sad and uncalled for. I am an African Jamaican black British. I come from the same background, having a lot of half brothers and sisters. I am not sure if there's more half brothers and sisters outside of the family. But we women have mental health problems with these types of men they are so messy. And it's men ego that plays a big part in having a football team of babies and more. May many blessings go with you 🙏 and your children 🙏. We women are born strong soldiers.
The victims here are the poor children. So many Irresponsible 'adults'.
She needs to take accountability
Wtf I’ve just listened to all of this for to still be with this man! Kmt she think the church family will fix him smh she don’t understand that she still has a broken home. She thinks a broken home is just an absent father.
Yeah even as a guy I think her current BF is a disgrace but she can't get any better than him unfortunately
@@jayo3074facts she knows her chances are limited of finding another man with four kids. She’s settling
This is a heartbreaking story because Tasha doesn't even realise her own significant vulnerabilities that have led her to be not just susceptible to dysfunction but also a willing participant. What is clear is that using the 'keeping a family together' narrative is how she rationalises her decision to remain in the relationship because it gives her validation. The internalised misogyny was difficult to hear, blaming women who don't owe her anything and making excuses for a man who made conscious choices to cheat with over 50 women. Furthermore she can 'understand' that her 4th BD has traumas that impact his behaviour but does not extend such grace to any of the women that he manipulated, especially the one who was 10 years younger than him. Age gaps like that are often associated with men who are predators because what does he have in common with someone 10 years younger and it was disturbing that he justified cheating with this young girl by saying 'she was on me' as if he was powerless in that situation. Tasha you don't see that you are a victim because your metric of what a victim is, is skewed. A victim is not synonymous with someone helpless and unable to function. For example, you described a scenario where one of your BD did not want to use condoms when you did and you eventually succumbed. That is coercion and coercion is sexual assault. You have had a lot of loss in your family and that must be incredibly difficult. I hope you find a therapist you connect with and can begin to address the patterns you have repeated. I see you are in a helping profession and I am sure you know that children fare better with 2 happy separated parents that those that remain in dysfunction. A man who disappears for 2 months and threatens to leave his children's lives is NOT a family man, he is for the streets. You are teaching your children that abuse and love can coexist and that abuse is justified if you have trauma. Abuse is not only physical, please educate yourself so you can teach your children to break the pattern of generational trauma.
Hi, wow. I must really express how much I appreciate your message. Not all of it is accurate, as I was only able to come on and tell my story because of the work I've done and the strength I've gained.... but I do not know it all, so it is always helpful when someone is giving helpful insight and knowledgeable insight from another perspective. Some of the things you have said, I have said myself. Shortly after doing this podcast, he has stopped seeing and contacting the kids.. which I've always know would come to this and I didn't have time to explain, my preparation for this. One thing is... which no amount of therapy will be able to stop, is that there are new and ways of deceiving people, you've just got to be able to change how you allow it to affect you.... I knew what I was deciding to tolerate a long time after I realised his abuse. I really wish I had more time to explain this in detail... but again, massive thank you for your knowledge and insight xxx
100% Agreed. Perfectly written 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
Interesting podcast , however I feel Tasha won’t get anywhere with this man .. too many women and kids involved .🥺
Way way too many but let's be honest no serious guy would want her and it's shame because she seems like she's a really mature woman now
Thank you for sharing your story, One Love to you and your children
Half way through and I can honestly say she needs a hug and a therapist. Also doesn’t like Jamaican men because they’re frivolous with children and different women but has 3 herself! Regardless she needs a hug
Hey, thank you... I'm not sure if your Jamaican, I think you might be, so it's only right that I apologise... this comment was cut down cause I did give it more context and I did say some in a certain generation. I have 4 children. It was lnt the amount of children... it was about them being scattered around and of the same age... anyway. I'm very well and a hug is not what I need.. bless you... but again, I apologise if I caused offence, as I thought that would as I was saying it.
@@transparencywithfire1195 noooooo don’t apologise to me at all you’re allowed your preference just thought the reasoning was wild at the time. I still haven’t finished watching as it’s difficult to watch someone who seems so nice be abused. May I ask if you’ve reported to the police? I know I haven’t finished but I do hope and pray you have.
@@transparencywithfire1195 I am most definitely NOT Jamaican 🤣🤣🤣🤣 so don’t worry no offence was caused.
@TGTBTUPoddy thank you. It was a very long time ago. Around 17years now. He really needed help at first but in the time we were together, the police was called to help remove him. I found it amazing that it had me emotional, but then I realised, I never give that part of my life a second thought. I tend to leave things and move on
Oh babe, you have been through it! That’s a lot. Sending you lots of hugs babe 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
I’m just hearing excuses as to why she’s staying with these men.
And everyone just sympathising with this BS.
I fully respect her and hope God brings her blessing and healing x
😢A man like that is troubled, you know what ladies we need to do our homework. We are left literally holding the baby.
These are the things thar make me glad I'm single with 1 baby daddy to coparent with. I really think this is a confidence thing. Women, especially black women, really need confidence.
Power of letting go is a real thing u need to let that man go your doing to much yourself and your allowing to much. Self love is needed in this situation. You make excuses don’t matter who u get taught by you know what’s right from wrong your allowing and enabling his behaviour sis
She has no idea of the damage that she is doing to her children. She made incredible mistakes and now she's trying to make it right. Her brokenness has made her accept his behavior. Those kids will find each other when they are grown. Ridiculous.
Now get the BABY FATHERS into the studio.
Let's hear their side of the story
🤔
Usually the same old story
I can relate to this story they ask for kids to trap us
You need to also take your side of responsibility. Women who are with 'toxic' men look past all the red flags because either their attracted to his behaviour or they just don't want to be single
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 if you’ve never been in a situation like mine you’ve no place to judge.im aware of what happened and now seeking therapy.in my case I was in a relationship scam so yes I was trapped and lied to
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 grew up in an abusive household didn’t know what right relationships are I’m now in a very loving one after being single so please don’t judge what you don’t know
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 I now work a very well paid job have my own car and house and raising four kids at the same time so I’m doing well since I got out from a narcissist relationship
@@homehelpsupportgroup2256 don’t judge what you don’t know
Ladies, always remember your child's father's family will ALWAYS support them over you. Never seek their advice regarding your relationship 8 times out of 10 they will only tell you what's best for him.
The woman seems so lovely, gutted that she is still with this man. I hope sooner then later she realises deserves better then this and shows him the door. I know she's not naive and falling for his tricks. I think she's keeping him to have a family unit, how it looks to her family etc. My personal opinion NEVER take back a man who cheats, there will be the occasional few who actually redeem themselves, but the rest of them see you as nothing and will do it over and over. He doesn't care about your physical or mental health. The extent BF3 was cheating he definitely has issues, an addiction, low self esteem, unfulfilled in life (life generally) or never really got women...something. But really deep it would you want a man or disrespect yourself for a man with these issues, let alone the sh*t he's out you through.
I pray God guides this woman towar
Towards a life that is best for her and her children and it brings her peace.
I only allowed one male to fool me once! Lesson learned and I've been single abstinent since my son's conception 5 years ago. #oneanddone
Don’t let the actions of one man rob you and your child of happiness- choose discernment and due diligence in your future relationships!
Emotional abuse - leave, it will break you down eventually- !
Bless her, she’s been through it 😮
Don't allow baby dad number 4's mum get into your head! Your dad taught you the right way and don't abandon your values for someone who don't have values in terms of accepting cheating and lying behaviour.
Don't worry, I didn't... thank you. His mother and I, haven't had a relationship in a long time and those comments led to a big, endless conflict.. that saw the end of our communication
You cant create life on empty promises. Make sure that your foundations are laid before accepting to bring life with anyone. Anything that happens more than once is accountability not an accident
Commendable mother who takes accountability
How?
Commendable???
.....female empowerment. Mo accountability or responsibility required..
Someone show me where I didn't take accountability on all 3 relationships.. don't try and find things that are not true. Or would you like me to point out where I took accountability because obviously some of you are dying to make up some issues with what I have said... I am here and open, so go ahead
We're not firing shots.....I do want to point out where you stated that your experience should be some kind of warning to women.....I've asked my 11 year old daughter to watch this as an example of how not to lack judgement in life particularly in relation to choosing the right mate and bringing life into this existence.....
Strong woman, no judgment here ,you looked after and provided for your children and gave them unconditional love dispute everything,well done 🙌🙏
She is a very strong woman.
But she is not looking after her children’s mental and emotional well-being by staying in these dysfunctional relationships.
She demonstrates that she is not looking after her own mental and emotional well-being because she was never taught how. My guess is, she came from a very troubled home- her father may have had all of his children all by one woman but what was the quality of his relationship with that woman?
I suspect that she has a history of childhood mental and emotional challenges that she hasn’t attended to. Unless she engages in a healing journey’ this trauma filled cycle will continue.
The therapy she had- I wonder whether it got her to address the behavioural effects that past abuses had on her mental and emotional health- and I mean childhood/teenage challenges/abuses.
These are the foundations of where the problems are occurring, not the troubled men she decided to engage with. These choices are as a result of her unresolved traumas.
Go sis what an amazing heartfelt story so proud of you blessing to you❤❤
This episode was like some Love & Hip Hop madness but unfortunately its her reality. I hope she too gets the threapy she needs because continuing to choose men that don't respect you, insist on unprotected sex & have no morals is WILD! And yes you can say they need help, but sis you're not a therapist let them GO and stay blessed ❤
Hey, thank you for your kind words. Fortunately for me, I am a qualified counsellor but I've also been a health and social care worker for many years, where I've worked in rehabilitation centres, young people's homes, care homes, etc. It's in me to try and understand and help where I can. I won't change that because we are who we are... but I am very glad that I found my way out of the DV situation when I was in my early 20s xxx
Lovely sweet girl clearly very fertile. Hard to switch off even though it was like watching a car crash in some parts. Stay strong and in a career people❤
The last baby father can make you lose your head. Can make you go mental with all the MIA and habitually lying 😮
Chatting to 50 different women and getting some of them pregnant lol that's wild asf imagine the STDs that man is spreading
I pray she chooses herself 😢
Her baby was 5/6 months and she's on dating apps and going on dates 😩👎🏽 we do it to ourselves! Kmt
U couldn’t make this stuff up😭
In a way yes we should look at the men we choose to be with and take our time in getting to know them
Ikr, like wtf?!
No wonder the buses are always late 😂😂
LOOOOOOOOOL
Funnnyyy
That's funny 😅😅
Wow in your 30s and such a testament. After the 2nd almost BF i wud have been done
The first should have been enough
Me too - no way - had two by 23 unless l was married no more - and l kept it that way as my second baby dad was soooo abusive- and his family supported his nonsense! I’m free now and have nothing to do with the family - Men - some are a sick !!
@@SusieQ156 you mean the men you CHOOSE are sick
Originally from Hackney, A childhood former friend has 7 kids from 5 women. All of them are decent looking to once attractive, non of them had kids before. My former friend is about 5ft 8". Never been reliable, never held a job for any amount of time, was even lazy at selling drugs. Was always lying, got me into trouble and dumb situations in my younger years. Owes me money. He would try and talk to any girl all the time, on the street or in his car, in my car, it was annoying.
I don't have any kids, I'm gonna be 40 this year.
Alot of men believe this high value man nonsense. They watch these Red pill content. They believe you must become real, then show your worth to a woman.
Truth is you have to sell the DREAM to women and cover up any red flags about yourself with LIES. The type of men that struggle with women are probably not playing the GAME, aka telling lies to get what you want. That is the real GAME.
I have learnt from real life and not the internet.
Good points Sir.
Do not have kids; these women can NEVER be trusted.
U m or f
U can stay and try and work ur relationship out but what ABOUT UR MENTAL HEALTH?
Some need to go through dark to find their light. I think this is one of those cases
This is so deep girl sending you love strength and blessings
This woman has been through it, God bless her 🙏🏾❤️
This was really hard to watch 😢 this lady seems to have a good heart but with a good heart you need a high level of discernment as people will take advantage of your kind nature. She seems to use a lot of her energy helping others but who is pouring into her and helping her become a better and happier version of herself? She seems to be forgetting that her peace and progression is far more important and a higher priority than her partner’s. Relationships are obviously give and take but her partner’s seem to be doing a lot of taking and not a lot of giving. I’ve read the comments and I understand that she wants to keep a family unit but is normalising the last bf’s behaviour most beneficial in the long run? Would she be happy if her daughters were to go on and also have relationships like this? I really hope one day that she can show a healthy example of relationships and marriage to her kids like her parents did for her. Babe please don’t feel guilty to leave that man behind to find someone who is as nurturing and understanding as you have been to these men, you honestly deserve someone who would never cheat on you as bare minimum ❤ A man who doesn’t want to be a parent unless he’s in a relationship with you and can reap your emotional benefits is a waste of space
I agree with you. Thank you. ❤️
TOO MIX UP ..TOO MUCH SLACKNESS ..HAVE SOME SELF RESPECT AS A WOMAN ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVE GIRL PICKNEY …
She's way to mix up
I agree. She sounds like she don't know better and crying out for acceptance
Bless you sis… you’re really trying to heal this man… rather then heal yourself 😢
You got too comfortable with bad behaviour… you seem to be desperately rationalising this mess… you are sadly teaching your children the generational trauma of poor relationships continues 😭
I am sending you more love and power sis… I see your intentions.. . But you gotta no when to stop…
She's a very good storyteller, men are MAD!
Women have no accountability. You do not get an endless supply of good men especially after you’ve had a child and especially after you continue to choose poorly and then get pregnant over and over again. It’s over for her now in terms of long term serious relationships. I just hope she does right by those children and learns to figure out herself in the process.
Why did she choose these "mad" men then?
@@jasonvoorhies6431 I think this statement is so blanket term because it's not a thing you would desire so therefore every man is the same. What I can say is that you can tell she has trauma from somewhere and that she has made decisions and met people from her place of self worth and that's caused her to have these situations. Two people are at play so both people need to be held to a standard which will never be the case as the woman is always at fault in everything. Now to say she's never to have a longer term relationship. You can't say for sure that she never will because there is always someone out there who will love your cracks and somehow nourish you whole. It happens. The likely hood of that being around the circle she's in, is lower though because not in a rude way but you can mind if see where everyone's mind is at. Single mothers everywhere and fathers just having the baby and running.
When I used to live with my grandma in the ghetto in Kilburn I never stayed in the area. I always made sure to met my friends in other areas not because I am better than anyone but you end up having the same mindset as everyone else and what's around you becomes normal and I didn't want that for myself. I was married at 20 but divorced and I remarried again and I had no issues at all finding me that were willing to be with me and my children but it was for me to decide if they were really ready to take that step with me and my precious babies. So I was very picky and now my husband is a father to those children you'd not even know they aren't his. Sadly we have some drama from their father because of me moving on and he wants ti hurt me by using those poor children. Ugh. It is incredibly important that both woman and man be careful who they lay with and have ling term commitment as the goal before children. What's sad is that so many of us humans are walking around with childhood wounds that aren't addressed and then we have children. Not everyone is smart and aware enough to change because it's scary and painful and it takes a life time of conscious effort to do better. Our communitkes need to take mental health and emotional health as a whole more seriously for us to heal because we'll end up hurting each other always. It's so extremely sad.
@@jayo3074 men like to reveal the madness once in their mind your trapped through pregnancy or marriagde. A lot of hate for real responsibility and when it's not ALL about them anymore.
@@sinceresong9907 yeah I don't believe this myth sorry. Women know exactly what kind of men they are dealing with before they get pregnant or married. And what benefit does a guy have in "baby trapping" a woman? It's women who decide to give birth not men 😂
This is what happens when you love man too much chaii. Why are you making these reckless decisions at this age and still continuing to be with someone who is absolutely toxic and can’t keep it in his pants…. What a pity
She seems like a lovely lady but what you just said is the harsh truth. Everyone just sympathising but not understanding, at some point she needs to take accountability for her reckless decisions. Why she giving all these men babies aswell. We have to do better
Babe thank you for telling your story, you are so brave ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ hugs ❤
This woman needs to put her children first. History will end up repeating itself. Her son growing up seeing his mother accept this behaviour and daughters also growing up to think men like this are acceptable. Have some self respect, heal, love yourself and leave all this madness for the sake of your children. The Russian woman is the only one with sense in all of this . As a woman this episode just upset me, mother's need to do better or use contraception. I dont want to hear you play victim and blame everyone else but the man you chose to keep laying next too is the one you have every excuse for . Sorry but I'm sure your dad would agree this is pure foolishness
Morning. Some of the things you say is very triggering but I see it's not coming from a bad place. I get a little defensive when people mention my dad... but where you're concerned, you haven't been cruel and I can't argue with facts, my Dad would be disgusted. Where my son is concerned though, please don't. He'd be quite annoyed at this comment, cause he never saw or knew of anything until he was told about it years after it had ended.... but thank you for your advice x
@@transparencywithfire1195I’m sorry, but listening to your narrative of some of these scenarios is slightly childish. The fact that you can tell your story means you’ve got over most of what happened. I honestly want to hug you because all this compassion you have for these men is not needed. This 4th BD, based on your description, appears to be a struggle love situation. How are you honestly judging this young girl and her choices is baffling? He’s probably manipulating both of you. But how old is this young girl? Is she 29 or 25? I’m so sorry about your little sister; hearing you had to watch the video was heartbreaking. My advice is don’t take any more of this situation; you can’t keep something together at the detriment of your mental health, but all the best if you decide to stay.
@krissib3394 thank you and I will tell you that I left shortly after this video... I would have and was explaining that it was going that way but I needed to do things amicably. I do judge this girls because what she has done and continues to do, is uncalled for and sick... it's got nothing to do with him. Why trouble me and my family
But thank you for your kind words x
There's a clear correlation here. She attracts damaged people and she is patient attempts to work through their floors. So she thinks she's being a good person but she's just endangering herself. It's a similar storyline each time but with a different execution. I genuinely pray for her and hope thay she seeks help x
WHEN US THE WUCKLESS MAN GOING TO BE INTERVIEWED???????
It's not about what the young girl and her mum says, he's the crazy one. The issue is him.
Misplaced attention.
Imagine having so much vim for the young woman.
That other woman is young and may not know better, yet she is still here with the man. Who knows what he's feeding the other one because she now has 2 babies with him also. They are in the same boat essentially but Tasha has age on her side and should know better. Sad
Something aint right 😕
What a roller coaster of events 🙏🏾, number 4 is deffo a swindler 😂
Thank you for sharing your story Tash Love you loads ❤
Watching this hurt me bro am a good good man I have a mum auntie sister and a niece our purpose is to protect what we claim as a Man 😢
Hats off to you Tash. Sounds you’ve gone through it with a lot of loss and raising your kids as best you can.
These men are wild and we want to keep our families together and accept our men for who they are and trying not to change them but take accountability for their actions. 100% try and help but don’t lose yourself. ❤❤
I have had a good few field days reading your comments and I couldn't respond to all.
I've read that I need therapy a few times... not just any therapy... real therapy, lol.
I've read that I am damaged beyond repair... that one made me laugh, I have to be honest, sorry.
I heard I have to love myself and learn, etc.
Now, let me attempt to help some of you, cause in all honesty, I've been touched by some of your kind words, seen a different point of view from some of you, sickened by some and find some of you destructive and mental.
Firstly... Falling into depression and being sad over the loss of my family members is not drama or abnormal... so deal with your mind frames on that one.
2nd - my children are very happy. They thrive in the highest groups at school, attend many private classes, performed in West end theatres, and are extremely talented. I do not struggle, I do not find it hard. We are a family that loves children and that's what I know. I have fun with mine whilst raising them. They are advanced and I am not run down!
I do not hold any of my children's father accountable for ME having MY children, I wanted all of them and all but the 2nd was planned but she (now 8 years old) is an amazing blessing. My partner has been a father to her since she was a baby.
3rd - if you think that a man or woman cheating on you should cause you a pain that damages you forever, then you are the one who needs the therapy... I cry and I get over things and move on, that is life... I'm sorry if the fact that I can function after all my lose, offends some of you, but that is a YOU problem, that YOU should seek to find help for. I've done the work on dealing with my grief. The relationships, have no lasting bearings on my heart or soul... so deal with your own minds with that!
I am well educated, work, continue to study, not overcome by bitterness... some of you would do well to understand what kind of strength and love for yourself that takes. If my life angers you... like I said... that is a YOU problem.
Though I do apologise about how I feel about the young Jamican generation of men. I tried to explain and be as respectful as possible.
I don’t usually comment or give advice to strangers on the internet. I respect and understand everything you’ve said, but you are still with the 4th guy, giving him everything he needs in life, a loving women. You need to leave him for your own sanity. Whilst you’re still young and able.
@mk1-ij3h thank you. I appreciate the advice. I was trying to explain that I am in the process of trying to forgive and failing... which is very highlighted in my words... but I completely understand why many feel this way. My priority has always been, trying for the kids. X
@@transparencywithfire1195 I hear you, and can definitely see that it comes from a place of love and understanding and can tell your a top mother and loving person (im currently watching your yt vids as I type). I guess just try not to forget that you’re doing the person a MASSIVE favour, we can forgive but don’t forget. And most of all don’t get played. An that’s coming from a man. I’m 28.
When you start talking the truth and be factual
Everything will fall into place
@@Kington357 deep breaths for you... I have no time. If there was more time and I was more factual, people would think I was really mad for trying to keep my family together. Everything is falling into place nicely since I've done this interview... so thank you
There is no man on this earth who is worth loosing your mind over. Stop centering these creatures.
Came here from the tiktok clip
I want to know whats the learning curve here?
It doesn't appear that there is one.
The message is still take whatever is thrown at you in the name of saving your family because shes still with him... SMH
Number 4 wanted to trap you ! Game playing - trash ! He played with your emotions 😢
Girl I hope you write a book. Your test is your testimony
You don’t care if he’s there or not and now you’re single mum
I think before you teach anyone or trying to help anyone I think you need to do more work on self before helping others. I’ve been there I’ve been through it but our response to how we have handles a situation has been totally different. Sending you my love sis hope it all gets better x
My Daughter's father got another woman pg and lied about me. We split and i made a vow not to get together with another man until my daughter turned 18. So for 15 years I stayed very single. Then when she was 18 and a few months, a mutual friend introduced me to my wonderful Man. I feel he was so worth waiting for. Thats my personal story but i'm glad I waited.
Sometimes you gotta put dating on ice and concrete on raising your children.