*Enjoy this video and want to see more?* ► Watch my storytime videos for an inside look at my experiences, updates on navigating life, and insights on self-love and healing: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2Yp-v3_I2affkZbsluNSR_m.html&si=GuNTiY6u06bYn0UA ► Check out the Ego Next Door Podcast for in-depth discussions on narcissistic abuse, raising awareness, and learning how to protect yourself and your loved ones in both personal relationships and workplace settings: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2Yk8r5P8HlJgXAm0niH4c33.html&si=XBOzaCqPeCAPCwEN ► Explore my storytelling videos where I express myself in a more artistic format: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2ZyfvDcl8i3_zEtq-by6CPf.html&si=z9pHvvZz7UBxJWQt
Your eyes and body language says it all. You don’t need to speak or explain yourself. I feel you , I’ve been there. I think only narcissistic abuse survivors can understand what you were really feeling 😢 Sending lots of love to you ❤
I appreciate you saying this so much. It really means a lot to me. I'm sorry you've also experienced this type of abuse, and I hope you are in a better place now. Sending love to you too. Thank you ♥️
I feel like I didn't breathe until you got to the escape day! I haven't spoken to my mom sis or bro in 5 years. Hopefully never see them again. I'm so happy you broke free! Beautiful kitties too!!
I’m sorry that you also had a rough experience with your mother, and siblings too. I can’t imagine what it’s like having had all that with parents AND with siblings on top of that. I hope you are healing and being gentle with yourself. Thank you for your support 💜 the kitties say thanks!!
I'm glad you got away. I went no-contact with my malignant narcissistic mother as soon as my father died January 27, 2024. She scares the EFF out of me. She will NEVER come near me or my kids.
Thank you. I am glad you got away too, and are creating that much needed distance from her, you and your kids. You are a great parent for protecting your children that way ♥️
My abuser is my twin sister. I go through phases of not being able to look in the mirror, because I see her. I stopped being alone in a house with her about 15 years ago. My twin has been both emotionally abusive, and physically abusive. She is this way to my parents and little sister. She scares me. Fortunately she lives 200 miles away right now. I know there are a lot of people who look very much like an abusive family member, but I doubt there is many people who go through this with a twin. I can look at certain parts of my face in the mirror, like my hair or teeth, but not my full face because it is her I see.
I am so sorry that this is your experience. I cannot imagine how that feels like. If it helps, I am certain that even as identical twins, you are nothing alike in expression and most importantly: the eyes. Abusers’ eyes are soulless and so cold. You are so much better than that. I am glad you are distant from this person. You should be proud of yourself for making it this far and choosing yourself ♥️🫂✨
This was beautifully done. I can’t imagine how difficult it was for you to film this and then edit it and work on it. Thank you for being an inspiration to all of us ❤❤ I hope the world gives you all the love and peace you deserve 🌸🫂🫶🏼
Thank you for your comment. I’m sorry that you’re still struggling. It can be really hard to process everything that has happened to you, especially after decades of brainwashing and feeling like what happened to you was your fault. Just know that it wasn’t, and you deserve peace at last, and to treat yourself and enjoy life 🫂❤️🩹
I'm glad you are free now. It takes so much courage to make it out, and healing is definitely a process. I'm sorry you're still feeling the weight of it, but know that you're not alone. Stay strong ♥️
@@EgoNextDoor hey girl you gotta wash that man right outta your hair, Come on turn on your heel and forget about him,look after yourself and laugh with friends😄❤️❤️❤️ hugs from me .
"Inappropriate affect" was something I learned about with disorders and trauma. Usually, not always, associated with defense mechanisms! Smiling or laughing when talking about something sad is fairly typical. It's our attempt to force ourselves to feel better, or cover how we're really feeling.
This is true. It can very much be a defense mechanism, especially in the context of trauma. Understanding this can help us be more compassionate towards ourselves and others who display these behaviour. I'm sorry that you also had experiences that lead you to have these coping mechanisms and I wish you all the healing in the world 🫂💜
I know that fear of cats being harmed (or scared). It could seem ridiculous to some but that fear in itself can be paralyzing and very stressful. Add the constant mind f**kery that has you spending more time questioning reality than living life to the fullest, esp during times when they are on “good behavior”. It’s utterly exhausting. Thank you for sharing your story. 🌹
I appreciate your grace in acknowledging the complexity of these emotions.. It's true, many people don't understand it. But for us, our pets are our family. For me, they are and always were my only family. The mental strain of navigating a relationship filled with uncertainty and inconsistency is very life-sucking. Thank you for watching, I appreciate it ♥️
@39:42. You put into words what I’ve been feeling. Not the same situation, but the same characters. My abuser is my spouse. I’ve been wanting to get out but I don’t know how. Thank you so much for being an inspiration and sharing your story. Peace to you my beautiful friend❤❤❤
I'm so sorry about what you’re going through right now. I cannot imagine how difficult that must be. Your comment touched my heart and I am wishing you the absolute best. Please know that you are not alone and that there are resources and people who can help. Your safety and well-being are so important. When you are ready to escape, and if you're looking for support, please reach out to someone you can trust, a friend, family member, or if you’re not sure you can trust those, look for organisations in your location that specialise in helping those in abusive situations (they may have an email or phone number you to reach out to). I am sending you strength, I know it is difficult to take that step and escape. But remember: you are brave, and you deserve to feel safe. I truly hope you find peace and safety as soon as possible ♥️🫂
After 43 years of it ALL, my husband got super angry with me last August and in a rage told me to get the F out. I was stunned and shocked and he said it again. I quietly just walked to my sewing room, grabbed a back pack, filled it and left. As I walked past him to leave he was eating the meal I had just made and didn't say a word to me. I went to a skanky motel for a few nights, then to a niece's home for a few weeks then into an affordable apartment. He has text me to get back home. He had tried to guilt me into coming back. I am doing well on my own without that continuous chaos. Good luck everyone ❤
Making the decision to leave a situation that wasn't healthy for you, after so many years, takes a lot of courage. I'm glad that you are finding peace away from the chaos. Your story is inspiring, and a reminder to many that it's never too late to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. Good luck to you too, and thank you for sharing ❤️🩹
Thank you so much! Yes, the cognitive dissonance can be such a battle between what we know is right and what we were conditioned to believe. Sending love right back 💕✨
I can't imagine what it was like to film this and know you were finally able to do something for yourself. Narcissists are hard and their marks last so long in our minds and hearts. I really hope you can learn you're not alone and what you went through is so real
Filming and editing this was definitely a challenge, but knowing it might help people makes it all worth it. Thank you so much for your kind comment ♥️🫂
I relate to your story so much. Your experiences are similar to mine. I've also recreated my life over, not once but several times. I'm so glad you chose you. Always put your well being first and stay safe. I wish you the best. Remember you are not alone, you are strong and good enough. ❤❤❤ Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to me that my story resonates with you. You're not alone either - we are stronger than we realise. Wishing you peace, strength, and all the best on your own journey too 💜
I’m sorry you also dealt with such a terrible mother. I hope you are away and healing from the years of neglect and emotional damage 💜 also, thank you for watching!
@@EgoNextDoor yes I’m finally understanding it all and have stopped trying to have a relationship with her. Thanks for sharing your story and so eloquently!
I'm glad you put the 'smile disclaimer'. I do the same thing, and often find myself naturally making friends who also have gallows humor. I need to remember to be aware of that when I share my own story.
Thank you! It's great to see with someone who gets it. Gallows humor can be such a unique way to bond and deflect painful experiences. I'm sorry that you've also had your fair share of those 💜
I remember the feeling of not being able to breathe and take a breath. I left two and a half years ago. Shortly after my escape my ex partners daughter went no contact. We support each other. I miss Cow, but I had to leave the cat behind because it was his cat. It is so hard sometimes, but I had to choose me. Thank you for making this documentary. I hope other survivors who have been victimized find peace and comfort and love of self.
I'm glad you chose yourself and decided to find a way out. I also understand how much you miss Cow, unfortunately sometimes decisions like this must be made but I'm sure she knows you didn't mean to leave her. It's nice to hear that you and your ex-partner's daughter support each other 💜 I also hope the documentary reaches and comforts many survivors, offering them the same hope and resilience you've shown. Thank you for your kind and supportive words. I wish you the best ✨🫂
I found this so hard to watch at the start, you have been through so much! I feel I understand better what you and other people have been through now and this will help me be a better friend and work colleague. The scripting and editing is amazing, a real professional job, you should be proud of this. Thank you!
Your empathy is deeply felt, and I appreciate your thoughtful reflection. I'm glad this has provided insight into others' experiences, and I'm grateful for your commitment to being a supportive friend and work colleague. Thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts ♥️
I too have felt this "sick love" for my abuser. I love the way you define that feeling. Where in the world did you get that term? It's so to the point that I'm stuck, just ruminating.
Oh, it took a long time for me to realise it was sick love.. also, I do a lot of in-depth research for the educational content that is my channel, so it helps me learn more too :) I’m so sorry that you feel this way too. Please know that you are not alone. Sometimes we get attached to people who hurt us a lot because we are groomed by them to be “obsessed” with them. Maybe listening to the episodes of my podcast here might help you be more aware of the patterns so you can begin cutting those chains. I wish you the best 💜
Thank you for opening people’s eyes to this… Your story really resonated with me; and I know that you’re making people feel less alone in their situations dealing with individuals like these.. ❤
@@EgoNextDoor I also wanted to post on here for anyone who is not familiar with the Mica Miller case #JusticeforMica. Please check out her story as well. Sadly, she is no longer with us. This story also shines a huge spotlight on narcissistic abuse in the church; and has gained worldwide attention. It is SO important to spread awareness about this now more than ever because we have the ability to do so. Stay strong everyone!
Thank you for sharing Mica's story and raising awareness about this important issue. It’s crucial that we continue to shed light on narcissistic abuse, even in cult-like settings. I believe that together we can make a difference ✨
Thank you 💜 I just want people to know they are not alone in their struggles, and raise awareness for people who never went through any of this to know how they can help.
I’m hopeful for both of us! I hope we all get our happy ending. Just because someone doesn’t want to be healthy doesn’t mean the people who love them have to suffer. Choose you … going through it and my son is too. You are worth it! I am too! Anyone that needs to hear this, you are worth it too! Thank you for sharing your truth. I needed this more than I can put in words. Xo and too your cats too
Your words mean a lot to me. Thank you for sharing, you are worth it too! I’m hopeful for both of us as well. We all deserve a happy ending. Sending love to you and your kid 💜
Your strength and honesty will help so many people. So beautifully expressed and inspirational. Thank you 😍 I look foward to following your recovery and send you much love xxx
I appreciate it and I thank you for watching. I’m happy to know it has helped you gain more awareness about your own struggles and I hope you are healing ❤️🩹
It is true. You are correct. I talk about the other stuff (and will continue to) in my podcast (Ego Next Door Podcast - also available here in the channel!)
I'm new to the narcissism world, due to unmasking my mother's narcissism, and I'm nearly age 50! It's NEVER TOO LATE to "wise up" and GTFO! In my case the "rescue op" ultimately was for my son. I’ll try to just hit the highlights, Oct 27, 2021, I got the shock of a lifetime - my sister gave me and my mother 23andme DNA kits, just for fun, right? I took mine, and mom, well, mom DID NOT take hers (why will become clear later) - turns out my “dad” growing up, is NOT my dad! My real father, as it turns out, is a novelist, he's still alive, I’ve met him, he lives in Florida, and is an awesome guy. I’m now a bit of a “unicorn” - I’m both the ELDEST child (on mom’s side) and now the BABY on my real father’s side! Anyways, we (my sister and I) bring this discovery to my mother Christmas that year - she feigns ignorance, claims she didn’t know I wasn’t my now known to have been step father's child - I let it go, figuring she’s got her reasons, is embarrassed, idk? Things go on for the next couple of years, my mother was living at my sister’s place in WA at this time. She owns a house in MO, that was paid for, and empty, FYI. My kids and I moved to that empty house with mom’s blessing, and during this time find out my daughter is pregnant with my first grandchild ❤ - well, all this time, my sister had been doing “detective work” and uncovering lie, after lie, after lie, of mom’s, many of which weren’t even necessary. The culmination of all of this, mother’s day this year, my sister informed me she had spoken to my now known to have been step-father, and let him know I knew I wasn’t his son (he and I hadn’t spoken for years at this point) - to which news, he was shocked, and devastated! He DIDN’T KNOW. So I let my kids know about all of this, I don’t hide things from them. My daughter, rightly so, decided NOPE, and moved back to TX, where she gave birth to my granddaughter, I also followed my daughter back to TX briefly, so got to be present for my first grandchild’s arrival 🙂 My son stayed behind in MO, to help my mother get moved BACK to her house from my sister’s place in WA (My sister ended up even having to PAY for mom’s move, after mom promised for months she would have the money saved) - we’ve essentially determined that all the signs point to mom being a “covert/vulnerable” type narcissist. Her weapon of choice, the guilt trip, and her M.O. is 100% deceit. So I find myself in the unenviable position of approaching 50, and having nearly as many years worth of lies vs truth to sort out 😮 Conveniently enough, and I feel this was the universe throwing me a bone/life-line, the DNA discovery provided me with my TRUE IDENTITY to “slide into” 😉 - to finish the story I started, August 29th, I swung back up from TX to MO, scooped up my son, and Brought him 2000 miles west, to WA, where we’re both at now, and the whole family has gone 100% NO CONTACT with NM (narc mother) over her lies/manipulation/abuse. August 29th was final interaction, and if you’re a fan of the terminator movies, you’ll see the irony in that date being the NC date - in the terminator universe, August 29th is known as “Judgment Day” - not that we’re trying to “punish” NM, mind you, mine and my sister’s family have just opted to let NM face her own consequences, and PROTECT our respective families from her toxicity. I.e. STOP the cycle of narc abuse with US. I can’t even wrap my head around what my mother has done, tbh - the level of deceit it took, and to KEEP THAT UP for as long as she did, it just boggles the mind. Her LIES and manipulations, have robbed not only me, but also my real father of 46 years of memory making time. We're NOT dwelling on that, mind you, it's just hard to wrap your head around someone robbing someone else of something so IRREPLACEABLE. It truly was the "straw that broke the camel's back" for me. Zero trust left. 100% unforgivable.
Wow, what a wild ride you’ve been on! It’s amazing how much strength and clarity you’ve shown in unraveling all of that and stepping into your true identity. Breaking the cycle and protecting your family takes real courage. I know how difficult it is to heal and find yourself after so many lies and toxicity. Wishing you peace as you move forward 💜
@EgoNextDoor Thanks for the supportive words - it HAS been a struggle, to be sure. At the same time, it's been VERY ENLIGHTENING, as well - suddenly so many questions about the "why" things ended up where they are have been answered, and so many things that just felt out of place my whole life, suddenly have all fallen into their proper "columns" and make total sense now. So I guess it's a double-edged sword, on the one hand answers to lots of questions, on the other hand, the emotional pain involved being the COST of said discoveries. But still, 100% WORTH IT for the FREEDOM the decision for NO CONTACT has brought. ❤
I was married at a young naive age to someone who slowly became this and sabotaged everything in my life. I escaped finally at 53. 10 years of deep intensive therapy. I wish you had had a counselor and a victims advocate to help you get out. Womens shelters could have helped you. But I know what being under the “spell” and its all you know. School Counselors need to be trained in this to help with planning. The pie- could have been taken to poison control and analyzed and then had them arrested and a file at police department and domestic violence advocate who can help people create files. This is domestic abuse. It is cult control behavior and grooming to tolerate. There are detox plans for people who have been part of these toxic systems. I understand that the nervous system becomes paralyzed in fear from their paranoid and overbearing control tactics. It is straight our of ancient chinese texts on how to control people. I am glad you are out. These people are incapable of changing. It is most definitely Programming. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing your experience and insights. It takes immense courage to escape such a difficult situation, and your journey after so many years is truly inspiring. I admire your strength, especially when being under that narcissistic 'spell' is so challenging. Unfortunately, where I'm based, there are very few resources like victims' advocacy, women's shelters, or free counseling available. Even seeking help from the police for a restraining order has been difficult. I genuinely appreciate your support and the valuable information you’ve shared about available resources; I hope others reading this can find options where they live. It’s vital for us to raise awareness and help those still in these situations ❤️
Yes. They moved into my place in April 2023 and pretty much took over. I have another video where I go into that part of the story more in-depth. It’s in the “story time” playlist in my channel 😌
@@EgoNextDoor ah okay I’ll check it out! That’s awful 😢 so sad that parents behave so terribly to their children! I don’t know how they live with themselves. Sending you hugs!
Hallo Jen, thank you for your story... 🙏 I'm happy that you could escape! If you want try to pray to Jesus. I hope you will someday start a trusting relationship with Jesus.
It's important to understand that concepts like stockholm syndrome and coercive control are complex and can be deeply personal experiences. Stockholm syndrome is a psychological response where hostages or abuse victims develop a bond with their captors or abusers. Coercive control involves a pattern of behaviours that seeks to take away the victim's liberty or freedom and strip away their sense of self. I will be discussing these further on the next podcast episodes.
*Enjoy this video and want to see more?*
► Watch my storytime videos for an inside look at my experiences, updates on navigating life, and insights on self-love and healing: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2Yp-v3_I2affkZbsluNSR_m.html&si=GuNTiY6u06bYn0UA
► Check out the Ego Next Door Podcast for in-depth discussions on narcissistic abuse, raising awareness, and learning how to protect yourself and your loved ones in both personal relationships and workplace settings: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2Yk8r5P8HlJgXAm0niH4c33.html&si=XBOzaCqPeCAPCwEN
► Explore my storytelling videos where I express myself in a more artistic format: ua-cam.com/play/PLoLfzKPTct2ZyfvDcl8i3_zEtq-by6CPf.html&si=z9pHvvZz7UBxJWQt
Your eyes and body language says it all. You don’t need to speak or explain yourself. I feel you , I’ve been there.
I think only narcissistic abuse survivors can understand what you were really feeling 😢
Sending lots of love to you ❤
I appreciate you saying this so much. It really means a lot to me. I'm sorry you've also experienced this type of abuse, and I hope you are in a better place now. Sending love to you too. Thank you ♥️
I feel like I didn't breathe until you got to the escape day! I haven't spoken to my mom sis or bro in 5 years. Hopefully never see them again. I'm so happy you broke free! Beautiful kitties too!!
I’m sorry that you also had a rough experience with your mother, and siblings too. I can’t imagine what it’s like having had all that with parents AND with siblings on top of that. I hope you are healing and being gentle with yourself. Thank you for your support 💜 the kitties say thanks!!
I'm glad you got away. I went no-contact with my malignant narcissistic mother as soon as my father died January 27, 2024. She scares the EFF out of me. She will NEVER come near me or my kids.
Thank you. I am glad you got away too, and are creating that much needed distance from her, you and your kids. You are a great parent for protecting your children that way ♥️
My abuser is my twin sister. I go through phases of not being able to look in the mirror, because I see her.
I stopped being alone in a house with her about 15 years ago.
My twin has been both emotionally abusive, and physically abusive. She is this way to my parents and little sister. She scares me. Fortunately she lives 200 miles away right now.
I know there are a lot of people who look very much like an abusive family member, but I doubt there is many people who go through this with a twin. I can look at certain parts of my face in the mirror, like my hair or teeth, but not my full face because it is her I see.
I am so sorry that this is your experience. I cannot imagine how that feels like. If it helps, I am certain that even as identical twins, you are nothing alike in expression and most importantly: the eyes. Abusers’ eyes are soulless and so cold. You are so much better than that. I am glad you are distant from this person. You should be proud of yourself for making it this far and choosing yourself ♥️🫂✨
My mother and I look very much alike and I too have a hard time looking in the mirror ❤
This was beautifully done. I can’t imagine how difficult it was for you to film this and then edit it and work on it. Thank you for being an inspiration to all of us ❤❤ I hope the world gives you all the love and peace you deserve 🌸🫂🫶🏼
Thank you for your kind words. Doing this helps me too. Supporting others fills my heart 💞
I'm glad you escaped at a young age. I'm still trying to figure out how to let go, and I'm 61 (and they're gone)!
Thank you for your comment. I’m sorry that you’re still struggling. It can be really hard to process everything that has happened to you, especially after decades of brainwashing and feeling like what happened to you was your fault. Just know that it wasn’t, and you deserve peace at last, and to treat yourself and enjoy life 🫂❤️🩹
I planned my escape for two years. I finally made it out, 8 years later I am reeling from this painful life. Thank you for sharing your story.
I'm glad you are free now. It takes so much courage to make it out, and healing is definitely a process. I'm sorry you're still feeling the weight of it, but know that you're not alone. Stay strong ♥️
@@EgoNextDoor hey girl you gotta wash that man right outta your hair,
Come on turn on your heel and forget about him,look after yourself and laugh with friends😄❤️❤️❤️ hugs from me .
"Inappropriate affect" was something I learned about with disorders and trauma. Usually, not always, associated with defense mechanisms! Smiling or laughing when talking about something sad is fairly typical. It's our attempt to force ourselves to feel better, or cover how we're really feeling.
This is true. It can very much be a defense mechanism, especially in the context of trauma. Understanding this can help us be more compassionate towards ourselves and others who display these behaviour. I'm sorry that you also had experiences that lead you to have these coping mechanisms and I wish you all the healing in the world 🫂💜
@@EgoNextDoor For sure.
I know that fear of cats being harmed (or scared). It could seem ridiculous to some but that fear in itself can be paralyzing and very stressful. Add the constant mind f**kery that has you spending more time questioning reality than living life to the fullest, esp during times when they are on “good behavior”. It’s utterly exhausting.
Thank you for sharing your story. 🌹
I appreciate your grace in acknowledging the complexity of these emotions.. It's true, many people don't understand it. But for us, our pets are our family. For me, they are and always were my only family. The mental strain of navigating a relationship filled with uncertainty and inconsistency is very life-sucking. Thank you for watching, I appreciate it ♥️
@39:42. You put into words what I’ve been feeling. Not the same situation, but the same characters. My abuser is my spouse. I’ve been wanting to get out but I don’t know how. Thank you so much for being an inspiration and sharing your story. Peace to you my beautiful friend❤❤❤
I'm so sorry about what you’re going through right now. I cannot imagine how difficult that must be. Your comment touched my heart and I am wishing you the absolute best.
Please know that you are not alone and that there are resources and people who can help. Your safety and well-being are so important. When you are ready to escape, and if you're looking for support, please reach out to someone you can trust, a friend, family member, or if you’re not sure you can trust those, look for organisations in your location that specialise in helping those in abusive situations (they may have an email or phone number you to reach out to).
I am sending you strength, I know it is difficult to take that step and escape. But remember: you are brave, and you deserve to feel safe. I truly hope you find peace and safety as soon as possible ♥️🫂
After 43 years of it ALL, my husband got super angry with me last August and in a rage told me to get the F out. I was stunned and shocked and he said it again. I quietly just walked to my sewing room, grabbed a back pack, filled it and left. As I walked past him to leave he was eating the meal I had just made and didn't say a word to me. I went to a skanky motel for a few nights, then to a niece's home for a few weeks then into an affordable apartment. He has text me to get back home. He had tried to guilt me into coming back. I am doing well on my own without that continuous chaos. Good luck everyone ❤
Making the decision to leave a situation that wasn't healthy for you, after so many years, takes a lot of courage. I'm glad that you are finding peace away from the chaos. Your story is inspiring, and a reminder to many that it's never too late to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. Good luck to you too, and thank you for sharing ❤️🩹
@@tmo.48never go back. It will become 100 times worse since you “abandoned him”. Its a trap when they charm you back.
I’m so proud of you and happy that you recognized this abuse. I think the cognitive dissonance is the hardest part!! Sending love and light!!
Thank you so much! Yes, the cognitive dissonance can be such a battle between what we know is right and what we were conditioned to believe. Sending love right back 💕✨
I can't imagine what it was like to film this and know you were finally able to do something for yourself. Narcissists are hard and their marks last so long in our minds and hearts. I really hope you can learn you're not alone and what you went through is so real
Filming and editing this was definitely a challenge, but knowing it might help people makes it all worth it. Thank you so much for your kind comment ♥️🫂
I relate to your story so much. Your experiences are similar to mine. I've also recreated my life over, not once but several times.
I'm so glad you chose you. Always put your well being first and stay safe. I wish you the best. Remember you are not alone, you are strong and good enough. ❤❤❤ Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to me that my story resonates with you. You're not alone either - we are stronger than we realise. Wishing you peace, strength, and all the best on your own journey too 💜
I know exactly what you’re talking about my mom is the same way she’s a covert narcissist… great video!
I’m sorry you also dealt with such a terrible mother. I hope you are away and healing from the years of neglect and emotional damage 💜 also, thank you for watching!
@@EgoNextDoor yes I’m finally understanding it all and have stopped trying to have a relationship with her. Thanks for sharing your story and so eloquently!
You are welcome 💜🫂
Much love and respect. Been there. Don’t look back…..you’re not going that way.
Thank you! I appreciate that, and I'm sorry you also went through something like this. Let’s keep moving forward, victims unite 🫂💜
I smile because if i show how much it hurts it leads to me having to comfort them for my pain.
Sending you strength 🫂 You're not alone in this 💜
I'm glad you put the 'smile disclaimer'. I do the same thing, and often find myself naturally making friends who also have gallows humor. I need to remember to be aware of that when I share my own story.
Thank you! It's great to see with someone who gets it. Gallows humor can be such a unique way to bond and deflect painful experiences. I'm sorry that you've also had your fair share of those 💜
At 31:47 ... I feel so humbled by that! I do the same thing. Wow. Thank you!!! I wanna jot that down in a journal! Great note
Thank you so much! I’m so glad it resonated with you-and what an honour that you’d include it in your journal 🫂💗
You go girl,be so proud of your strength.❤❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much 💜
@@EgoNextDoor hugs and kisses
I remember the feeling of not being able to breathe and take a breath. I left two and a half years ago. Shortly after my escape my ex partners daughter went no contact. We support each other. I miss Cow, but I had to leave the cat behind because it was his cat. It is so hard sometimes, but I had to choose me. Thank you for making this documentary. I hope other survivors who have been victimized find peace and comfort and love of self.
I'm glad you chose yourself and decided to find a way out. I also understand how much you miss Cow, unfortunately sometimes decisions like this must be made but I'm sure she knows you didn't mean to leave her. It's nice to hear that you and your ex-partner's daughter support each other 💜 I also hope the documentary reaches and comforts many survivors, offering them the same hope and resilience you've shown. Thank you for your kind and supportive words. I wish you the best ✨🫂
I found this so hard to watch at the start, you have been through so much! I feel I understand better what you and other people have been through now and this will help me be a better friend and work colleague. The scripting and editing is amazing, a real professional job, you should be proud of this. Thank you!
Your empathy is deeply felt, and I appreciate your thoughtful reflection. I'm glad this has provided insight into others' experiences, and I'm grateful for your commitment to being a supportive friend and work colleague. Thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts ♥️
I too have felt this "sick love" for my abuser. I love the way you define that feeling. Where in the world did you get that term? It's so to the point that I'm stuck, just ruminating.
Oh, it took a long time for me to realise it was sick love.. also, I do a lot of in-depth research for the educational content that is my channel, so it helps me learn more too :)
I’m so sorry that you feel this way too. Please know that you are not alone. Sometimes we get attached to people who hurt us a lot because we are groomed by them to be “obsessed” with them. Maybe listening to the episodes of my podcast here might help you be more aware of the patterns so you can begin cutting those chains. I wish you the best 💜
Thank you for opening people’s eyes to this… Your story really resonated with me; and I know that you’re making people feel less alone in their situations dealing with individuals like these.. ❤
Thank YOU for watching. I'm sorry that you went through sometimes even remotely similar to this. I wish you all the healing ❤️🩹🫂
@@EgoNextDoorThank you kindly..Blessings!
@@EgoNextDoor I also wanted to post on here for anyone who is not familiar with the Mica Miller case #JusticeforMica. Please check out her story as well. Sadly, she is no longer with us. This story also shines a huge spotlight on narcissistic abuse in the church; and has gained worldwide attention. It is SO important to spread awareness about this now more than ever because we have the ability to do so. Stay strong everyone!
Thank you for sharing Mica's story and raising awareness about this important issue. It’s crucial that we continue to shed light on narcissistic abuse, even in cult-like settings. I believe that together we can make a difference ✨
This is really brave of you to share your story.
Thank you 💜 I just want people to know they are not alone in their struggles, and raise awareness for people who never went through any of this to know how they can help.
So glad you got out 🤍
Thank you ♥️🫂
What a brave and strong women you are good for you for escaping you are quite an inspiration
Thank you, I appreciate it 💜🫂
I’m hopeful for both of us! I hope we all get our happy ending. Just because someone doesn’t want to be healthy doesn’t mean the people who love them have to suffer. Choose you … going through it and my son is too. You are worth it! I am too! Anyone that needs to hear this, you are worth it too! Thank you for sharing your truth. I needed this more than I can put in words. Xo and too your cats too
Your words mean a lot to me. Thank you for sharing, you are worth it too! I’m hopeful for both of us as well. We all deserve a happy ending. Sending love to you and your kid 💜
@@EgoNextDoor air hug! Keep posting….
Really good job putting this together. From an emotional and editing point of view
Thank you. I really appreciate your comment ♥️
Your strength and honesty will help so many people. So beautifully expressed and inspirational. Thank you 😍 I look foward to following your recovery and send you much love xxx
Aw, thank you so much! This is such a sweet comment. Thank you for watching and for being here ♥️ sending love to you too 💕🫂
Hey there I’m here from threads. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for watching 💕
I really hope you are able to work through everything and thank you for sharing your story. It has helped me understand some of my trauma.
I appreciate it and I thank you for watching. I’m happy to know it has helped you gain more awareness about your own struggles and I hope you are healing ❤️🩹
I support you
Thank you, I appreciate it 🩷
Thank you for sharing, I know it took a lot of energy and work put into this! 💜 you're helping so many by sharing your story.
keep going 💜💜💜
Thank you so much, I really hope it helps many 🥺♥️
thank you for sharing your story
Thank you for watching and for being here ♥️
Thx for info. Really helped me
Glad to be of service 🫂
💗💗💗 cant wait to leave
I believe in you. Stay safe 🫂🩷
The frightening thing about this is that we are not hearing the half of it. The abuse is likely so much more than reported here.
It is true. You are correct. I talk about the other stuff (and will continue to) in my podcast (Ego Next Door Podcast - also available here in the channel!)
great motivational ; ( 10/10
Glad you liked it!
Thank you for filming this
You're welcome, thank you for watching 🩷
Thank you.
You’re welcome, thank you for watching 💜
Finally sitting down to take this one in. looking forward to it!
Hope you enjoyed it ❣️
I'm new to the narcissism world, due to unmasking my mother's narcissism, and I'm nearly age 50! It's NEVER TOO LATE to "wise up" and GTFO! In my case the "rescue op" ultimately was for my son. I’ll try to just hit the highlights, Oct 27, 2021, I got the shock of a lifetime - my sister gave me and my mother 23andme DNA kits, just for fun, right? I took mine, and mom, well, mom DID NOT take hers (why will become clear later) - turns out my “dad” growing up, is NOT my dad! My real father, as it turns out, is a novelist, he's still alive, I’ve met him, he lives in Florida, and is an awesome guy. I’m now a bit of a “unicorn” - I’m both the ELDEST child (on mom’s side) and now the BABY on my real father’s side! Anyways, we (my sister and I) bring this discovery to my mother Christmas that year - she feigns ignorance, claims she didn’t know I wasn’t my now known to have been step father's child - I let it go, figuring she’s got her reasons, is embarrassed, idk? Things go on for the next couple of years, my mother was living at my sister’s place in WA at this time. She owns a house in MO, that was paid for, and empty, FYI. My kids and I moved to that empty house with mom’s blessing, and during this time find out my daughter is pregnant with my first grandchild ❤ - well, all this time, my sister had been doing “detective work” and uncovering lie, after lie, after lie, of mom’s, many of which weren’t even necessary. The culmination of all of this, mother’s day this year, my sister informed me she had spoken to my now known to have been step-father, and let him know I knew I wasn’t his son (he and I hadn’t spoken for years at this point) - to which news, he was shocked, and devastated! He DIDN’T KNOW. So I let my kids know about all of this, I don’t hide things from them. My daughter, rightly so, decided NOPE, and moved back to TX, where she gave birth to my granddaughter, I also followed my daughter back to TX briefly, so got to be present for my first grandchild’s arrival 🙂 My son stayed behind in MO, to help my mother get moved BACK to her house from my sister’s place in WA (My sister ended up even having to PAY for mom’s move, after mom promised for months she would have the money saved) - we’ve essentially determined that all the signs point to mom being a “covert/vulnerable” type narcissist. Her weapon of choice, the guilt trip, and her M.O. is 100% deceit. So I find myself in the unenviable position of approaching 50, and having nearly as many years worth of lies vs truth to sort out 😮 Conveniently enough, and I feel this was the universe throwing me a bone/life-line, the DNA discovery provided me with my TRUE IDENTITY to “slide into” 😉 - to finish the story I started, August 29th, I swung back up from TX to MO, scooped up my son, and Brought him 2000 miles west, to WA, where we’re both at now, and the whole family has gone 100% NO CONTACT with NM (narc mother) over her lies/manipulation/abuse. August 29th was final interaction, and if you’re a fan of the terminator movies, you’ll see the irony in that date being the NC date - in the terminator universe, August 29th is known as “Judgment Day” - not that we’re trying to “punish” NM, mind you, mine and my sister’s family have just opted to let NM face her own consequences, and PROTECT our respective families from her toxicity. I.e. STOP the cycle of narc abuse with US. I can’t even wrap my head around what my mother has done, tbh - the level of deceit it took, and to KEEP THAT UP for as long as she did, it just boggles the mind. Her LIES and manipulations, have robbed not only me, but also my real father of 46 years of memory making time. We're NOT dwelling on that, mind you, it's just hard to wrap your head around someone robbing someone else of something so IRREPLACEABLE. It truly was the "straw that broke the camel's back" for me. Zero trust left. 100% unforgivable.
Wow, what a wild ride you’ve been on! It’s amazing how much strength and clarity you’ve shown in unraveling all of that and stepping into your true identity. Breaking the cycle and protecting your family takes real courage. I know how difficult it is to heal and find yourself after so many lies and toxicity. Wishing you peace as you move forward 💜
@EgoNextDoor Thanks for the supportive words - it HAS been a struggle, to be sure. At the same time, it's been VERY ENLIGHTENING, as well - suddenly so many questions about the "why" things ended up where they are have been answered, and so many things that just felt out of place my whole life, suddenly have all fallen into their proper "columns" and make total sense now. So I guess it's a double-edged sword, on the one hand answers to lots of questions, on the other hand, the emotional pain involved being the COST of said discoveries. But still, 100% WORTH IT for the FREEDOM the decision for NO CONTACT has brought. ❤
I was married at a young naive age to someone who slowly became this and sabotaged everything in my life. I escaped finally at 53. 10 years of deep intensive therapy. I wish you had had a counselor and a victims advocate to help you get out. Womens shelters could have helped you. But I know what being under the “spell” and its all you know. School Counselors need to
be trained in this to help with planning. The pie- could have been taken to poison control and analyzed and then had them arrested and a file at police department and domestic violence advocate who can help people create files. This is domestic abuse. It is cult control behavior and grooming to tolerate. There are detox plans for people who have been part of these toxic systems. I understand that the nervous system becomes paralyzed in fear from their paranoid and overbearing control tactics. It is straight our of ancient chinese texts on how to control people. I am glad you are out. These people are incapable of changing. It is most definitely Programming. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing your experience and insights. It takes immense courage to escape such a difficult situation, and your journey after so many years is truly inspiring. I admire your strength, especially when being under that narcissistic 'spell' is so challenging.
Unfortunately, where I'm based, there are very few resources like victims' advocacy, women's shelters, or free counseling available. Even seeking help from the police for a restraining order has been difficult.
I genuinely appreciate your support and the valuable information you’ve shared about available resources; I hope others reading this can find options where they live. It’s vital for us to raise awareness and help those still in these situations ❤️
So your parents we’re living in your house with you? I didn’t quite understand that part.
Yes. They moved into my place in April 2023 and pretty much took over. I have another video where I go into that part of the story more in-depth. It’s in the “story time” playlist in my channel 😌
@@EgoNextDoor ah okay I’ll check it out! That’s awful 😢 so sad that parents behave so terribly to their children! I don’t know how they live with themselves. Sending you hugs!
Thank you. Sending you hugs too 💜
Hallo Jen, thank you for your story... 🙏 I'm happy that you could escape! If you want try to pray to Jesus. I hope you will someday start a trusting relationship with Jesus.
You had Stockholm syndrome along with coercive control
It's important to understand that concepts like stockholm syndrome and coercive control are complex and can be deeply personal experiences. Stockholm syndrome is a psychological response where hostages or abuse victims develop a bond with their captors or abusers. Coercive control involves a pattern of behaviours that seeks to take away the victim's liberty or freedom and strip away their sense of self. I will be discussing these further on the next podcast episodes.
@@EgoNextDoor I understand the complexity, I was just expressing the fact that your situation was elements of both, but wasn’t either.
Yes, it definitely included stockholm syndrome and the manipulation itself was coercively controlling.
Why did they feel so threatened by you...they clearly hated you...there is noway they would do this to you.God bless you.