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- Опубліковано 8 січ 2021
- Tim returns from Vegas this week to discuss the Capitol Hill siege, why lesbians are incredible at their job, what comedians should do now if they can't scratch together a couple nickels, and closes out the show performing a new Billie Eilish song.
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#TheTimDillonShow - Комедії
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WHERES my refund
Yes. Ok. But can you please be sponsored by someone I can call about the emotional turbulence I experience about my flaccid tool while looking for an alternative to mass produced sugared breakfast cereals??? Gosh. Get it together already....for Christ!!!
SPECIAL FORCES OBTAINED PELOSIS LAPTOP
ua-cam.com/video/-5GHwTtO24E/v-deo.html
[updated link]
SIEGE AT CAPITOL WAS ANOTHER STING
GENERAL MCINERNEY EXPLAINED IT AT THE WHITE HOUSE LAST NIGHT, VIDEO CLEARLY SHOWS IT
EAT YOUR WORDS TIM, I DISLIKED WITHIN THE FIRST 2 MINUTES AND TURNED IT OFF.
>REPLYING TO ALL COMMENT THREADS BECAUSE I'M SICK OF TRAITORS.
Plot twist. Tim got his personal trainer into Q so eventually he would get arrested.
@@Agaetis181 I have beachfront property in Oklahoma you might be interested in. C'mon. How would anyone really know if it was Pelosi's laptop?
is it bad that my initial reaction to the capital raid was: this week's tim dillon is going to be amazing
We’re all doing it for the memes at this point aren’t we?
who better to narrate the book of revelations in real time lol?
No. I was pissed off that it would be reduced to humor about this ridiculous fringe. I was mad. It was so stupid. It writes itself. He did well with it. I am almost surprised. But sometimes Tim shines. Sometimes he's too callous and careless. But he says things that the left outright denies. He casually mentions that a reality exists which the left denies entirely.
If it were me, I'd do a few bits.
1: A fat antifa that does shit and says 'just an idea' as an excuse. Hilarious.
2. Joe Biden doing that press conference where he played the patronizing latinx music on his cell phone to the latin-looking person, but this time he doesn't stop and plays a pandering song for every race in the audience, each increasingly cringey. Then right when hes about to suggest finding a 1930's tune he recalled for the black fella in the audience, and his handlers are begging him to stop, then elizibeth warren strolls onto the screen, in a full headdress, and scolds Joe Biden for not playing HER indiginous music. Then they turn to the screen and say:
Live, from somewhere in the USSA, it's
The Tim Dillon Show!
I was like, "I can't wait for Tim Dillon to talk about this"
Lol
@@rogerfench2976 jesus christ, clearly undiagnosed.
Ben looks like an acoustic guitar teacher that does home calls for $40 a session.
Acoustic only 😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂the funniest one
@Frank Fanelli lol I see Peter from Office Space.
Ben looks like he builds artisanal computers.
I read that at a glance as "autistic guitar teacher" and had to do a double take.
amen bruh
I just ate my daughter out then killed her because I didn't want her to tell anyone
I’m literally listening to the king and the sting and came to look for your comments! PTL brothaaaa!
@@damien1065 #metoo
Gang shit brah. Onward.
Awoman
I tried to describe Tim Dillon’s comedy style to my friends. Now my only friend is a stray cat. She gets it. Best episode ever.
This one was great but you gatta check out the one from a few weeks ago Giuliani and the river of gold. It’s really the funniest podcast episode ever made by anyone
I think "the pit" is his magnum opus
Corporate steakhouse and How to be popular are canon
I’m in the same boat.
Waffle Sundaes and Puppet Shows is up there
Ben looks like someone that runs a youth camp.
Lol if Tim didn’t tie up every free second Ben has he prolly would.
Youth Concentration camp*
And he prob wouldn't even molest the kids
Hitler Youth?
Omg he totally does
When China takes over America Chin Dirron will still be my favorite comedian
Yes AND yes
I think I found a new screen name.
Triple Chin Dirrom you mean?
That took me a minute... but it was worth the wait
Our fake business will stop the Chinese invasion... please. They're already crippled from the influx of fake business.
“I had multiple personalities, and none of them are funny.” That’s hilarious.
Can we elect this as quote of 2021 already? 😁
Tim organized the capitol raid by telling people there were free boxes of magic spoon hidden under Pelosi's desk next to Tom Hanks.
Based
Ma-gic SPOOOOOOOOOOOOON
Yes or yes
For every box of magic spoon sold, one dollar is donated to Derrick Chauvin's release fund- Tim Dillon.
I'm a heterosexual conservative white man from Russia and I want Tim Dillon to marry me.
His personality is attractive
I cant decide whether to read this in lex friedmans voice or micheal malice lol
Get in line
I doubt that
Be careful, you'll get disappeared over there for that kind of thinking. Even in joking fashion.
Ben looks like a high school math teacher who actually cares about the success of his students.
Lmao
I'd say wood work, and he sits on his chair backwards and asks if the kid is OK since his dad left.
@@jhart1127 heartwarming
Because he's still young, wait till he hits 40. x)
@@morgangreen2601 Yeah, he looks like a friendly soul.
Ben is literally the straight man in this comedy duo.
Seriously if u just took a photo of Ben and a photo of Tim and ran a poll saying which one of these men is gay. I'm thinking like 90-10.for ben
@@patrickcolantuoni1724 you fucking stupid he's talking about the old school way comedians used to do like Abbott and Costello where one is silly and the other one is more serious also known as the straight man but it has a double meaning because he's actually straight
I have nothing but contempt for modern American culture, politics, institutions, life, etc... But I find Tim’s seemingly random disdain for Billie Eilish very life affirming.
"I told you this sobering up from the Qanon wasn't gonna go well."
Qanon is a CIA Professional TROLL!
@@chrismckinney788 Or some half way clever 14 year old kid who really gets the internet and watches Southpark. Possibly pretending to be Danish.
ua-cam.com/video/NGggz6BB8O4/v-deo.html
You guys didn't see the announcement did you go look at the guys UA-cam page video military there is a message actually
Lol still haven't figured out who Q is huh?
That Sebastian Maniscalco character, god damn
As a bisexual man, Tims point about gay men not working hard unless it’s for their dream job could not be anymore spot on 😂 and he’s 110% right about Lesbians and taking every job seriously too
How can a sexual preference makes you an expert on political issues?
@@nikstoun9478 the observation was about sexual preference and how people do their jobs. Literally nothing about politics.
Regardless of content I dislike any comment that begins with “As a (fill in identification) “ on principle
@@digitalsalsas as a sexually confused man that occasionally touches myself to the pictures of chinese food in restaurants, I get it.
@@nikstoun9478 his comment had nothing to do with politics.
When that lady said: “We’re storming the capital, it’s a revolution” it reminded of Old School when Frank goes: “We’re going streaking, up the quad through the gymnasium!”
I saw Tim in the Capital dressed as an officer!
I saw him there as well. He ignored me and assaulted multiple people.
@@dylynblue9864 11 babies and 6 household animals
My Leg I'd say more.. that's a low estimate. Tim was on a rampage.
That was Oscar
I actually saw Tim breaking in the window yelling follow me
Tim Dillon is the best ,yes or yes
Fkn yes
Well if my choice is limited I’ll have to say yes
Stop ratting on Tim's bestitude.
Hey, my name is Erik G too.
6es
“The Sommelier of the Apocalypse”. Oh. My. Fucking. Brain. I. Love. This. Man.
Tim: "It's annoying, with the screaming."
Has a hilarious podcast that is 93% yelling and screaming.
At least he's not screaming over others, and he has the best voice for yelling
@@pat6146 One of the best to ever yell.
@@dlwetter311 LONG ISLAND STRONG.
honestly ur podcast is better than JRE.
By far
Hot take. JRE is not good. Hasn’t been for a while. Granted, may be it’s just not for me. But Tim’s is funnier than the very well produced YMH and Theo Von’s, which is good too. Shit, even better than History Hyenas even though Chrissy Drip-Drops is hilarious.
You don't say
This one was pretty funny but Tim’s other ones are stale. The best of him comes out when he’s talking to someone he can overpower.
@@6vitamin I only watch YMH for Christy and the Toks tbh.
The Sebastian impressions kill me every time
Fun fact. The last time we had a civil war, A1 steak sauce was created.
Arguably worth it tbh.
that's why it's called A1, didn't you watch himym 🤔
Ben looks like a swim instructor at the Y who never gets in the pool.
“Get your scoop of ice cream and go.” That about sums it up...
Its been a real knife fight this last week
Life in the big city.
I read, "It's been a real fake knife fight this last week" .. more accurate?
Jokes are fun but you ain't wrong. Be well fam
My fake business was completely burnt to the ground, at least I’m insured
@@Peranine lol you said the thing!! Lol
Trans-race Billie Eilish is my new favorite character.
Same lol
Wheres the timestamp
That's actually Elliot Page's alter ego 😂
Tim “I’ve had some real attitude from the Koreans in a bodega “Dillon
If Tim Dillon wasn’t a top rising comedian he would’ve been out there stealing a monument in the White House somewhere
Life in the big city.
he probably has Pelosi's gavel under that desk
🤣
@@JeffKinglive Nah, up his ass.
@@notspeltdylan beat me to it
"The golden era of sucking at comedy." Got that right.
“I just move the fuck on”. This is what we have to get back to.
You're forgetting how much fun it is to be petty and mean, why skip our turn?
Protesting a rigged and stolen election, resulting in installation of a CCP puppet = "being petty"
@@publiusvelocitor4668 Yes and Yes! We could try to make the best of being corporate slaves to tech giants and puppet leaders, or we could live out our American heritage in revolution and spite. I know which one sounds more interesting.
@The Free Men Report damn half the country is a smoking crater? Wow.
@The Free Men Report hey it's your false premise I'm just making fun of it
Finally someone recognizes the rebellion in NOT having a tattoo these days. Thanks Tim for making me feel badass. Rofl jk.
Someone definitely showed Trump another angle of Kennedy in dallas before he made that press release.
some people are even mentioning that the video of trump telling the protestors to stop was a deep fake
I wouldn't doubt it.
:o
You owe bill hicks a nickle.
Something along these lines. Or threatened him with all kinds of legal charges.
The wait for the next tim dillon show since the capital riot has tested my patience. Love you guys.
Love you as well, Andre. Hope your fake business is doing well.
Ditti
Or ditti
Or
Ditto
Fucks sake
Back at ya 🍺
I was literally texting a guy for a tattoo appt while I was listening to this and then he got to "Tattoos are stupid" lol
I agree with Tim.
Synchronicity ....maybe the universe is sending u a message. 😁
Never base your decision on a comedians manufactured bit.
To each their own. I dont have one either, all my friends got em
never got the appeal, so many of my friends are tattoo artists for years and i still say nah brah
Hey’a, Tim, the woman who was “maced” was actually rubbing her eye with an onion wrapped in the towel she was holding. Truly bafflingly hilarious.
They want to be victims so badly they can taste it--damn the luck. Privilege is the new oppression, I guess?
Doesn’t that make you cry and help with the tear gas burns?
YES! I came to the comments to see if anyone mentioned this.
Is that some kind of folk remedy or is she stupid enough to hold the onion in front of the camera when she's supposedly trying to be fake teargassed
probably because she's one of the Antifa ppl pretending to be a Trump supporter the way she talks sounds so much like an antifa member lol also multiple antifa members were confirmed there ...
I'm surprised that BetterHelp is still sponsoring this podcast . Seems like a rich guy trolling Tim with his fake counseling business .
It is fake business on a new level. It's playing the long fake business game.
They don't let him be funny with it anymore though 😔
They don't let him be funny with it anymore though 😔
"Get your fucking ice cream and go" the only way any of us are going to get through 2021
Yes, now that people who hate us are in power, it's time to be orderly and agreeable. GFYS
@@publiusvelocitor4668 found the triggered trump supporter
@@vinny5638 Haha! Let me guess: you fumed for two years about nonexistant "Russian Collusion", and you think people walking into the Capital, as Capital Police held the doors open for them, was an "insurrection." Loser.
Tim Dillon, Sommelier of the Apocalypse
One of the best and more truthful rants in first 20 minutes. Exactly, who gives a fuck what someone is thinking when serving ice cream.
Not a lot of solid people left out there Tim. Thanks for having some integrity!
Same to all reading this.
It comes naturally to some of us thankfully lol
Yes, I’m so thankful for those of us who can still think critically and logically (and laugh at all the absurdity). Cheers! 😊
The only thing you can do is laugh at this point
@I love femboys Definitely! Makes Tim and some other comics all that more important right now.
The vid where he's pretending to be the guy with the bull horns was funny as hell!
It’s Ben’s ‘self soothing’ body language when Tim talks about race for me
@@Geozuki554 r/woosh
@@thatguydownthestreet8036 not really, its just retarded meme
@@Geozuki554 it is a common colloquial turn of phrase on the internet nowadays. It's the boomerism for me.
@@Geozuki554 guessing the guy who posted the op isn’t either you dunce.
LMAOO
Who else waits patiently on a Saturday night for these episodes?
Anyways thank you timothy for making me laugh, you are the best comedian alive today.
Yes or Yes.
"who is Satan.. We're all Satan" - that Billie Eilish parody, dead 😂😂😂😂
Stop the ratting...but START the RANTING!
Yeah stop ratting and conduct fake business instead.
It's Not Ratting lol
It's Virtue Signaling
Don't snitch, do fake business!
It sick it piss unfortunately
Keep it simple
Don’t produce it
Keep it fraudulent
Yes or yes!
We need a whole episode of Tim doing Sebastian. This is my favorite impression I’ve ever heard
BlueChew has stopped my heart 4 times, but I keep going!
Underrated comment
The Vegas part had my dying! He's not lying.
About the prostitutes? Asking for a friend.
@@rosephjosenbaum7130 lol
"When did this country turn into a nation of rats and squealers?" - George Carlin
These kids don't know nothin about that. Now recite the woke awareness pledge while observing this Stacey Abrams saint candle and repeat:
Awoman
Gooblegobble
Awoman
Gooblegobble
Awoman here
Gooble
Awoman there
Gobble
This is America now. Eat your Magic Spoon and never mind that your president keeps falling out of the bathtub.
George would be chanting BLM. Dont forget that
I already forgot the stupid thing that you said, it was so stupid. It's gone now.
@@rogerfench2976 Then you might have the same dementia level as Biden. Get yourself checked out.
WW1 Government encouraged snitching on fatties cheating rationing.
Tim Vaping at 1:17:56 killed me.
Also, The Ben Avery show recapping each episode sounds amazing.
Tim likes fake business, but he does hate fake comediens!
Yet he’s friends with Brendan Schaub? Doesn’t add up
@@adammay6663 didnt you listen? Schaub is taking advantage and cashing in. Tim explained he hates fake comedians thatbare also not successful.
@@CreativeName9001 I’m in the process of listening lol, that makes it make more sense
Ohh you mean most of them!? Lol it's hard listening to anyone else after you listen to him lol. It's like watching that porn that makes you nut. The you listen to rim tillion and you can't listen to anyone else, it's just lame! Why hasn't this man got his own show on Sirius or something?! I'd love to hear him take stupid ass sam's spot with him and sam!!! Would be 10× better!!!
Or you know what would be even better?! Get rid of Gail! And add Tim to bennington, leave Gail and her fake laughs....
Tim doing an impression of Sebastian is something I could listen to all day. Better than the real Sebastian yes or yes!
its like the naruto run into area 51 exept they actually did it, a bunch of em naruto'd a revolution for the apprentice guy
I can't stress enough how much I LOVE those death stares Tim gives Ben, like at [39:25]
when Tim Dillon says can you get me an instrumental my heart fills with so much joy I could cry and come at the same time
Tim should star in a remake of Jiminy Glick where he plays his son.
Fucking amazing
I’d actually pay for that lol!!!
They should remake all of Chris Farley movies and put in tim dillon.
Which one is he? I say Modine
Im getting YT recommendations for Jiminy Glick and the only reason I can figure is because I listen to Tim.
Ben's reaction when they're watching Q-Shaman and Tim says he knows comedians are two steps away from this behavior if they don't get a special 🤣❤️
What makes this so brilliant is its literally a 90 minute riff.
Id love to see him and Anthony Cumia together.
Thank you Tim. These past few months had been pretty grim for me. But atleast when I tune in here, I could realy laugh my heart out for an hour. Love you man
The 79 Days of Darkness are real. Yes or Yes.
YESSSSSS
all of the above
Yessssss!!!!!! 😲
Im the victim here
Everyone look at the optimist, over here.
It's only been a few weeks but the neon sign needs to be on all the merch
I have to admit, I didn’t like it at first, but the neon sign is definitely growing on me. 😁
"You will get sick and you will be happy" - World Economic Forum prediction on Tim's new BBQ Sauce
The fucking billie eilish song killed me
I laughed super hard at that.
Tim Dillon has on Whitney Webb on his podcast a couple times. Whitney Webb talks about the great reset all the time. Tim Dillion says great reset isn't a thing now? Not sure I follow.
Is it bad that when the riots were happening i was lowkey excited to hear what tim had to say about it
Same...I'm pretty disappointed tho. Was looking forward to him roasting that sad flabby trump loving militia
Who took a capitol no protestors with firebombs or lasers and commercial grade fireworks could take. What have you done lately?
Only if you were male
@@vivid_execution7014 they’re idiots, what’s there to talk about lol. It’s more sad than anything.
I think it's more important for my personal trainer to look into Q than what I'm eating.
*Tim blows his brains out on the opening night of his restaurant.
*Ben and his wife* “This is some great steak sauce!”
Tim tell us why Brendan edited out his argument with Portnoy
Wow I was thinking the same thing
Who’s Portnoy? The only Portnoy I know is from the movie tropic thunder
Portnoy came in hot
Tony Guzman the pizza reviewer
@@tonyguzman6798 Dave portnoy
God I’ve been waiting for this since the riot 🙌🏻
I know right best part about the news from America
You've been waiting since May?
These episodes are always a riot
27:38 Ben's reaction is why we always need video episodes
Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.
-Mike Tyson
I heard someone say there was shit everywhere. Didn't realise they meant actual shit.
Congressmen are gross.
That’s San Fransicko. Dems shit on sidewalks yes or yes.
I've been anticipating Tim going off on what happened this week.
Me too.😂😂😂😂😂
Ben looks like the “cool” middle school teacher which may or may not have a thing for the 15 year old girls
Don't miss Tim singing a song at the end of the podcast... hilarious! Thanks Tim and Ben, you're the best team ever! Good luck.
I'll be waiting all year for the Tim Dillon Billie Eilish collab
Has anyone else stopped watching news on television to hear Tim cover the latest events?
Yeah, absolutely!
Tim is my Tucker Carlson
I appreciate that he points out all the craziness.
Just here to point out that the “it’s a revolution” lady clearly was holding an onion in her hand and rubbing her eyes with it. You can see it on the clip you showed. Idk why or what it means just saying.
Lol thats exaclty how I feel! Idk what it means but like... it sure is fuckin there... And why is it fuckin there?!
I don't see an onion. Just saying.
That IS a fckn onion holy sh*t !!!!!
I can't remember the details, but someone was trolling on the forums where this stuff was getting organised telling them that rubbing raw onion in their eyes counteracts the effects of mace hahah.
@@foshiee2849 I’ve tried looking this up and there is not real answer but I truely believe she wasn’t rubbing it on her eyes to fake being sprayed. I really feel while she was on 4chan or wherever these conspiracy theorists meet she was told to do it and she did. Lol
Tim failed to mention that the 'maced in the face' lady was holding an onion and rubbing it on her eyes in that video.
😂
I saw the onion with my own eyes, but it’s so stupid I find it hard to believe.
@@linemanlovesyou859 um, have you not heard of crisis actors? Craigslist has been hiring them for years for all the BS psyops around the country, and there are even crisis actor schools/academies. It’s all very organized, and nothing is as it seems. These crisis actors who get featured (in MSM and viral videos) get paid very well, too.
@@linemanlovesyou859 I don't know who "you guys" are, but you can clearly see her doing it in the actual video. Lmao
Also I would like to see a remake of Clifford starring Tim.
This was my first Tim Dillon episode, and i’ve been watching ever since.
31:45 and 51:04 totally won me over. 😂❤
I started listening a few months ago, I've been going backwards to catch up on every episode... and it's probably the best prequels I've ever watched in my life.
Chris Cuomo: “Who said protests need to be peaceful?”
You have to work it into a joke, though, on a Tim Dillon thread. Like:
Chris Cuomo likes Tim Dillon SO much that he made a SECOND exception for Tim, following antifa/BLM. Now neither Tim NOR antifa needs to be peaceful or polite. And also according to Rachel Maddow anything under 7% is still funny.
I'm just spitballing now, don't go burning down my Target over here...
@@rogerfench2976 first half was a bit wordy, but that second was a haymaker 😂 killed me for a good minute and a half. Eat this like mfka.
Do you need help distinguishing between civil rights protests (and yes, even riots) and what just happened at Capitol Hill on January 6th?
Heres a brief synopsis for easy reference:
BLM protests are justified by decades of state-sponsored police brutality that still has not been addressed despite activists having brought it to the attention of legislators and politicians starting in the 1960's. It's also a fact that much of the recent violence and property damage was incited by cops and White Supremacist agitators who infiltrated the protests to smear groups like BLM and create negative press. Because literally everything conservatives accuse leftist activists of is projection, they floated the ludicrous rumor that ANTIFA and BLM were responsible for the worst behavior of Capitol Hill rioters, but that has already proven false as those arrested have been identified as "patriots."
I have several articles and data points on this topic if you're interested, though I'm going to guess anything that isn't reported by conservative media is "fake news?" Fun fact: Hitler called it "lugenpresse" (or lying press.)
Speaking of Capitol Hill, the riot in question consisted a few thousand racist divorced dads and grandmas committing domestic terrorism/sedition against the United States in an attempt to overturn an election--and to disenfranchise black voters in cities like Philadelphia--because they voted to reject a second term for the crypto-fascist Trump administration.
In other words, there is no valid comparison between BLM protests and what Trump incited, as even Republican Senators and House Representatives have admitted when forced to make a statement. Even the most shameless sycophants (AG Barr and McConnell) have rejected the false equivalence, and no one hates BLM more than those bigots.
Get it now? Hope this was helpful.
@@carolyntalbot947
OK, here’s my response
Your side literally attacked a senator. Fuck you. Rebuttle finished.
This is why we love Tim Dillon not even 3 mins in and he's dropping NUKES! Love this podcast!
The phrase "mostly peaceful" comes to mind for some reason.
tIMS IMPRESSION OF SEBATSIAN IS SO ON POINT LOVE IT
They should have broken into Comet Ping Pong
Pizza?
@@dylynblue9864 or 65.000$ hot dogs for Barry Sotouro.
I like how much bigger Tim’s right arm is than his left it makes me feel less alone
Hes beating other people off as well, so....
Great observation sir 😂
@@lastsecondhero87 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😭😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂 this whole comment thread thank you for the laughs guys
... It's a foreshortening effect, his chair is rotated slightly to the left the entire time.
I have waited my entire life to hear someone reference the movie “Clifford.” Thank you. Thank you.
I heard of Tim only a few months ago for the first time. All these old podcast are new to me. Tim is so funny. Ben is great. Together they are awesome.
Bruh Ben around 27:30 cracking up at that Viking dude is totally me for any type of that behavior lol. These people are bats*it crazy And hilarious. You can't even say those people have political views at that point of crazy.
Love your non biased comedy Tim we need more comedians like you out there you my friend are a breath of fresh cigarette smoke filled air lol
Tim’s impression made me laugh the hardest I’ve laughed in a couple months !!! So spot on !
His Sebastion voice kills me everytime
Tim is really losing weight
Mental weight, yes.
Keto
Hopefully not too much. Dont want him to get cancer.
Especially on his left arm lolol
It’s that all the magic spoon keto cereal
Today I found out I need Tim Dillon in my life. Lord help me.
12:43 I laughed my arse off seeing him bump the bottle out of the way while saying "they cut a thick loaf."