He was at my college graduation today. I wish he did an act or something. He said "I'd like to congratulate everyone here today...especially the graduates". But Lucille O'Neal (Shaq's Mom) was there and talked for about 10 minutes prior to that.
Absolutely brilliant! Think: Surrealism and Philosophy with a touch of Melancholy: what a winning combination! I love this guy from another planet. "When I was in the middle of desert a UFO landed. Three one-inch tall guys got out. They walked over to me. I said: "are u really one-inch tall?" "No, -- they said -- "We are really that far away"
@@kylegrunden1191 the comment was comedically ironic because the video did in fact contain sexual humor but the OP was correct that the majority of his work does not have sexual innuendo or foul language.
The joke I use (I also do stand-up, not nearly as successful...and no Oscar) is 'I saw the commercial Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires, so I called the Department of the Interior and said that unless they gave me a million bucks I wasn't going to do anything.'
Some of the jokes weren't as funny as others...but his ability to turn familiar things on their head and his deadpan is what makes him a singular comic.
@MEEHOWtv It adds to their character.. will ferrell used to be a football player and was in shape but now he has a gut and it just somehow makes him more funny
@xZimnii Apparently his stage persona reflects the fact that he is a very introverted guy and quite nervious about performing in front of people, so he developed this persona to suit his own characteristics.
haha it's really sad how much hatred people have in their hearts, so what if I'm Muslim, smile ... life is too short, I'm a friendly muslim don't worry ;)
If you think this is funny, I understand. If you do not think this is funny, I understand. If are not tempted to use at least ONE of these one-liners at least ONE time in your life, I don't believe you.
"I spilled spot remover on my dog and now he's gone" 😂
My favorite comedian of all time... It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it!
Indeed - for me that's the one I most remember also. Thx
"When I was a child we had a sandbox in the back yard... It was filled with quicksand... I was an only child... eventually." ~ Steven Wright
i spilled spot remover on my dog; now he's gone.
This joke was on Family Guy
WTF WHY DIDN'T HE SAY IT!!!!!
wish that was a real joke
same tbh
damn i thought he rlly said it
Was searching for some classic comedian I heard a bit back and stumbled into this genius...didn't need to search anymore.
"I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone."
My Intro to Steven Wright and I Love him. He doesn't even Try or MUG, he just delivers some very clever & witty material.
great material. great delivery. one of the best in originality.
He has always been one of my absolute favorite comedians.
I watched this randomly to find a quote someone said. Ended up laughing and enjoying him without finding said quote.
Tanor Faux family guy?
Was it "paint the whole world"?
He was at my college graduation today. I wish he did an act or something. He said "I'd like to congratulate everyone here today...especially the graduates". But Lucille O'Neal (Shaq's Mom) was there and talked for about 10 minutes prior to that.
The king of one liners.
How can you not like him? This man is a genius!
These jokes are flat out obscure and hilarious.
Absolutely brilliant! Think: Surrealism and Philosophy with a touch of Melancholy: what a winning combination! I love this guy from another planet. "When I was in the middle of desert a UFO landed. Three one-inch tall guys got out. They walked over to me. I said: "are u really one-inch tall?" "No, -- they said -- "We are really that far away"
Carlin and Stephen Wright, my two faves.
Steven Wright was hilarious, a unique comedian who wasn't mean-spirited and didn't have to rely on sex jokes or foul language to be funny.
Yea, but those type of jokes are still hilarious.
He literally used a sex joke in this video. Ironic...
@@a1rh3add this may be a three year old comment.. but come on.. why is the word "ironic" one of the most misused words of all time?!
@@kylegrunden1191 the comment was comedically ironic because the video did in fact contain sexual humor but the OP was correct that the majority of his work does not have sexual innuendo or foul language.
Tell it to my fat vagina.
I love this particular routine. I met him in 2010 at The Variety Playhouse.
My all-time favorite Steven Wright joke ... I brought some bottled water; I didn't know what to add.
Powdered water.
Couldn't stop laughing from the first joke awesome sense of humor:)
That's why he's my favorite!
I like Steven Wright and Mitch Hedberg a lot
They are equally awesome, like a very funny apple and a hilarious orange
Haha, I like how he's like so serious while saying such funny things :P
*powdered water
One of my favorites too!
"Second base was out of my way!" LMAO!
He was the voice of the radio host in the Quentin Taratino movies "Pulp Fiction" and "Reservoir Dogs"
A restaurant had a sign that read "Breakfast served anytime" so I ordered French toast during the rennaisance.
The Best !
OH MY GAWD was he the voice of the turtle of The Swan Princess?!?!?! THAT VOICE IS SO UNFORGETTABLE!
Love deadpan humor. Leslie Nielsen was the king of it. ❤
AMAZING mind~
brilliant mind!
The joke I use (I also do stand-up, not nearly as successful...and no Oscar) is 'I saw the commercial Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires, so I called the Department of the Interior and said that unless they gave me a million bucks I wasn't going to do anything.'
love you, steven
Steven wright is a comic genius
His Humour is intellectual and one needs to apply themselves to comprehend it but I love it because he's Unique.
The funniest guy.
Some of the jokes weren't as funny as others...but his ability to turn familiar things on their head and his deadpan is what makes him a singular comic.
very nice.
when does the dog spot remover joke come on
it doesnt
THE GUY ON THE COUCH!! XD XD XD XD
@MEEHOWtv It adds to their character.. will ferrell used to be a football player and was in shape but now he has a gut and it just somehow makes him more funny
original and funnnnnnnnnnnnny!
im living on one way dead end street !! .. LOL
i like his style..
Thanks.....
lol baby was born with armor, this guys is fucking hilarious.
"no i'm just very far away" genius >:I
“Do you think when they asked George Washington for his ID he just took out a quarter?”
"You think when they asked George Washington for his I.D. he just took out a quarter?" lmao
@JOESGONNAKILLY0U
What do you mean was?
This is still hilarious!
Holy shit it's the guy on the couch!
Great.
Totally!
Dogs have difficulty perfecting laughter
But even when they master it they don't get the joke
good point lol but i think his just promoting his new channel, he might have comedy videos on that channel as well? who knows lol
I type "witty comedian" this is the first thing that pops up, kudos youtube.
This guy is actually funny 😂😂
I am living on a one way dead end street
I was annoyed by bad service, so I gave them a piece of my mind - now I can't think clearly anymore.
Thurgood, i'll be fine......the robbery is what's important now!
I spilled spot remover on my dog and now hes gone...
I have a used parachutte for sale, never opend slight blood sain on it.
My face hurts.
@shuayb3 Are you guys stoned?
@xZimnii Apparently his stage persona reflects the fact that he is a very introverted guy and quite nervious about performing in front of people, so he developed this persona to suit his own characteristics.
I came from Game Grumps.
LMAO!
I spilled spot remover on my dog now he’s gone
His name is Vincent Schiavelli, and yeah, Steven does resemble him.
@Christofonopolus
someone has similar haircut to steven wright :)
i worked with a engineer kevin gavin says he was like that in colledge,
2021
@jagglerjog891 holy shit it really is the guy on the couch, lmfao!!
Steven Wright has an identical twin sister. He also has a tattoo of a
birthmark on his leg.
i put spot remover on my dog now he's gone
Reservoir Dogs radio guy
Where there is a will there is 50 faimly members.
How much pot did this guy smoke XD he’s all high thoughts
Thumbs Up to you Deenul Islam.
@tf2weekly hahaha lol
you either like him or you don't - his jokes / humour is classic/lame which makes it awesome : )
@changl72 - i dont think so. that guy had scary eyes.
240p, we meet again.
You probably watch movies on your smart phone.
Should it really matter?
@@libertyresearch-iu4fy this comment is from 7 years ago my man, relax lol
They ain't much better if you not makin money.
ha ha ha ha aaaaaaaaaaa HA!
Family Guy brought me here :D
a prescription what?
ha ha aaaaaaaaaaa
wadbiwoid?
When God takes acid, does he see people?
Thumbs up if a FAMILY GUY episode brought you here!!
I'm hella butthurt!!!! Like where's the spot remover joke????
haha it's really sad how much hatred people have in their hearts, so what if I'm Muslim, smile ... life is too short, I'm a friendly muslim don't worry ;)
You're a Muslim? Cool. Upload more comedy.
If you think this is funny, I understand.
If you do not think this is funny, I understand.
If are not tempted to use at least ONE of these one-liners at least ONE time in your life, I don't believe you.
@shuayb3 hahahaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahh ha
I still don't get that joke?
I don't get American comedy ???
I rarely see him smile....
I dont understand a few of these and it makes me really sad
It's spam.
Brain May clone...