I Broke Up With My Girlfriend And We Still Own A House Together
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- Опубліковано 11 вер 2024
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Moral of the story - Don't play house when you're not married. Feel sorry for the guy though
he made the dumb decision to live like a pagan so I don't feel sorry for him
Good to know perfect people still exist.
There's a difference between making a mistake and knowingly making poor life style choices.
again... you call it a poor lifestyle choice but he would be worse off if he had actually been married to her...
if he was married then maybe he would have more incentive to repair the relationship like people used to do.
I’ve been burned by just shared cell phone contracts I couldn’t imagine dealing w a house lol
It’s not fun bro ***raises hand and points at self*** lol
I've heard about shared phone contacts going bad from sooo many people 💔
This happened to me
even just sharing a pet sucks when you have to break up
Don't sign anything for anyone you're not married to
This has got to be one of the dumbest things anyone could ever do. Buying a house with someone you're not married to. Huge MISTAKE!
a bigger mistake would do that while MARRIED, only difference between marriage and non marriage is a government contract where your significant other gets half assets if it doesn't work out.
You ever watched Jenna Marbles? lol She was the first one I thought of..she did or is doing it too.
@@kujas True and that is why men who want to get married should be prepared for divorce, especially with the kind of divorce statistics in the US. I am not stopping them from getting married because it is their life but they should not be blind going in.
LoL
Getting married is the big mistake, unless ur a gold digger, then its pretty smart.
What if you write a contract before?
He's not on the note, but paid half the down payment.
$150k equity.
Seriously. Dude.
Now you need to hire a lawyer.
He's on the house note. He has stake in half of the house.
howzit3000 I heard the same.
He’s a idiot 😭😭😭
he gifted her the down payment. he has no right to the house. sorry bud
he said he is not on the note
This is why I laugh at shaking up couple who say: "We don't need a piece of paper to say we love each other. " hahahahaha....that little piece of paper is a lifeline.
Roxanne Gordon “shaking up couple “? I assume that’s a typo, but I can’t figure out what you meant. Help!
@@HoyaSaxaSD im assuming he means "shacking up". Like living together while not married.
@@jamessopkin I think she meant that it is a lifeline for the female.
It’s only a “lifeline” for the female not the man. Divorce court destroys the man and rewards the female always.
@@jamessopkin True but even living together with a woman can cause legal problems as well when you own businesses, properties, and even have kids together.
Went through this same thing. Bought a house together, owned it together after breaking up for a couple years.. Finally agreed on terms and I had to buy her out, house went from $550k to $850k in that time, so it cost me a good $150k to take it... Not a cheap lesson, but oh well.. Own it myself now and it's now $1M. $300k equity is still ok.
Why didn’t you guys think of getting married first? At least a good solid commitment, ya know foundation is set in place
@@zainafylthe she would have left with more in the divorce
NEVER move in to a house with a boyfriend/girlfriend without getting married, EVER. WAIT till you are MARRIED. #WISDOM.
mytuber81 The ex did this with his old girlfriend from high school after I divorced him. She stupidly put money down on the house, the house is in his name. I see craziness in their future. SMH.
Marriage doesn't mean anything if you're not self committed. I'll never marry someone cause it's throwing away money towards a stupid party. But being committed to a relation ship means WAAAYYYYYY MORE than having a marriage certificate
The marriage is the commitment. And you don't have to have a party
Bad idea to purchase a home with someone who isn't your spouse!
So when you and your spouse divorce..?? How is it any different
@@chipsammich2078she meant for the women
@@chipsammich2078 The judge automatically decides who keeps the house or forces a sale instead of one person having to sue the other.
@albertmendez2262 if both names are on the deed.. only if both want to keep it the judge will decide.. and one will have to pay the other for their half..
Shacking up was their first mistake
Don’t cohabitate nor marry.
It's fine having a girlfriend living with you... just don't go halves with a house. Lol. Either you own it or if it is her house she owns it. When there's a breakup you both go your separate ways and there's no problem.
@@TheFlyingZulubut she can still sue for half (common law after 6 months practically like being married)
"Y'all did it on a handshake."
Right. That's what it was. A handshake. Right.
tugboat2030 Something was getting a handshake but it wasn’t his hand
LOL, glad to know I'm not the only one who thought that.
Shaking hands while diong the horizontal hula....👍
Amazing that people will commit to purchasing a house or having kids when they cant even commit to each other! I have seen multiple people get burned in this situation and actually Dave is making it sound easier than it is. One friend of mine could not get her ex to agree to ANY of the sale offers because he wanted to keep the house. She was still on the mortgage 5 years later when she bought another house! It took 7 years for her to get her name off the mortgage. Luckily she made enough to qualify for another mortgage but nightmare does not begin to describe it.
Dave didn't listen to the guy properly. He's not on the title. He has no claim to this property. He should let his ex make payments to him because that's the best he's going to get. He has NO legal right to the home or the money, he just "gifted" her the money for the down payment. The equity in the house doesn't matter, it's not his house. She was the smart one in this.
What if they live in a state that is common law? He might be entitled to his share of equity then, I would think…definitely seek legal opinion on this one.
underrated comment. the men in this comment section are largely braindead incels
Yes that’s what I heard.
This is a lesson for all young people. If you are not married, only contribute money as though it is a gift that you will not see again. No amount of "saved" money from shared living is worth the headache and risk. Live separately until married or at least engaged. Do not pay each other's debts or buy large assets such as houses/cars for or with a significant other. Do not let the other pressure you into something like this if you are not committed enough for marriage.
He paid rent basically.
I’m working on paying off debt before purchasing a home but if my boyfriend hasn’t married me yet I’ll be buying it on my own.
☝🏼 yes!!!!
and then move him in im sure
Why don't you propose to him?
I was in a similar situation where we were about to purchase a house but it ended up falling through in the end. Then we broke up a handful of months later. Dodged a big bullet.
Sounds like your guardian angels worked hard to disrupt that joint home purchase. Someone has a praying mother and grandmother😇
It baffles me that people think it’s a good idea to enter into such an enormous financial endeavor like buying a house with someone they’re not married to. That’s an imminent disaster waiting to happen.
Ham Sandwich hey ham sandwich cool name but your picture looks like a bologna sandwich.
Her really wanting the house is going to cause you a whole lot of future headaches unless you be firm now and insist on selling the house. It's not fair to you so don't feel bad for putting your foot down. Besides, what happens in a few years when you go to buy another house? You will still have that debt hanging over your head and may not qualify for a loan.
If he does get a judge to have them split the house. He should make sure it's has a certain amount of time like 120 days to sell the property. It's a tough one. Never buy anything with someone unless your willing to give it up.
I have no idea what the law is in Florida. But in many places, he'll be out of luck because he's not on title and there is no written agreement that he will be reimbursed for the down payment and/or has some interest in the home. In most places, agreements related to real property must be in writing. If he was on title, he would be able to do a partition action to claim his interest in the property. The court in Florida will very likely view his down payment as a gift. That's a hard life lesson to learn.
I think he s on the title but not the mortgage
Dave doesn't like living together outside of marriage
Karen Hardie It's more about purchasing together. I don't think he cares if you rent an apt together
he's like an evangelical christian dude but i don't hold it against him he's a good man
@Dee Cee Why do you think God would care if two people agree they are married verbally instead of getting a written contract? Is it the fact that a lot marry in a church and you need the church's blessing or is it straight up that paper contract? I get the church part..I do. I don't believe you need to do that for God to be ok with it. But that paper contract? No..makes no sense. That paper though can be good for the financial part though.
@Dee Cee But if you don't sleep with anyone but that person and share everything to me that is marriage. What is more respectable? 2 people who stay together for life or this other chick marrying a man and 7 years later getting a divorce when he didn't beat her, he took care of her financially..but she just got bored?
AMEN!! It's refreshing to hear someone not compromise their Christian convictions and especially from a man.
Also, it's about "shacking up" all together, the type of residence (home/apartment) is irrelevant.
marriage has its advantages....
So you can’t sign a mortgage loan with dual ownership?
So much Christian love in these comments sections. Such warm and empathetic people! So glad I walked away from religion and these people long ago.
Tracey Herlan I really wished my relationship with God blossomed but it just withered and now God is waiting to burn me for all eternity.
The Bible says for as many people as God loves he rebukes. When I was younger I was close with God and I felt like he was the only one there for me when even my family rejected me. Trust me, I don’t say with any joy that I lost my relationship with God. It is awful and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone but again how to you find you way back to loving someone who created you knowing that you would be tortured forever.
If you have children you know you would never knowingly put them on that situation if you actually loved them.
amen 😂
Yeah and I’ll probably die alone with STDs
Heeey, how are you doin' Dave? "...Better than you, obviously."
I wouldn't mind taking payments from an old gf but I wouldn't be in this problem to begin with.
Buying this guy out? I thought this guy doesn't have his name on the house. How can someone be bought out if they don't have a house in their name? Any info is helpful
Have you ever heard of the word no?
Steven Magallanes No
Warren Buffet's greatest advice is to learn how to say "No."
Why would you buy a house with someone that you don't have a commitment to?
IKR? either way , guess he was afraid of commitment...
I made this mistake and will never do it again.
Real question is...how is the property titled/stated?
If she doesn't have the money, she can't buy it. Period. What she wants doesn't matter!! Tough beans!!
House is in her name. Good luck buddy.
Junk Mail m
Yeah I didn't quit get if he is on the deed or not. But if he was a silent partner and basically paying rent, he's SOL.
Just sue for the down payment and 1/2 equity value of the home. If you win, which you should, put a lean on her and garnish wages. She will be forced to sell the asset to pay the legal disposition. Bankruptcy will be her only way out to avoid paying the man back.
majurbludd are you a lawyer? This is exactly what my lawyer told me to do. I’m in the same situation
that's what he got for free punanni.
If I understood correctly the house is only in her name? Buying a house with a girlfriend is not the problem, it's paying for a house that doesn't have his name on it. If his name was on the title then there wouldn't be a problem .
I feel bad for him too. But this is exactly why you dont play house. I bet money he doesnt really have rights bc hes not married.i wonder if he could sue her based on some common law laws in fl or the partnership dave mentions. It would have been simpler if he had married her but this new age thinking about not needing paper to prove love well this is what happens when you think this way....but this is a mess. Sadly I hope hes not scarred for life and never wants to get married for real.
Amber U he has rights to the house. Its a civil matter, he just has to prove he put the money down on the house. Testimony in court with paperwork in hand will make this a quick case.
NO common law in FL.
I love how everyone commenting negatively is leading such PERFECT lives as to hammer this guy for what he's done. Dating or married, it matters not. There's still legal ramifications and recourse here no matter the level of relationship.
Exactly, at least they can save the divorce costs and hassle ;)
Jason Burns , total agree it makes perfect sense to get in to a 30 year commitment to buy a house with someone, that you aren't committed enough to to get married.
Gee, it's only a house. Look how many people have kids without marriage. I find that far worse.
Why is it any different?
gatewaysolo104 ....because you can sell the house. Can you sell kids in your native land?
She will never complete those payments,wake up guy,pay attention,doesn't matter what she wants, .
Definitely, would not but a home with a boyfriend. I run them off!
Cohabitation always fails, and when it does, you learn why you shouldn’t cohabitate.
I just went through a seperation not A divorce.. 20 years together built a house, raised 3 kids.. about 6 months ago we split up.. She wanted the house she had to buy my half. (I paid 100% of mortgage)..
I didnt have to pay alimony, she didnt take half my pension or 401k..
Question i have.. why is being married a good thing?
I warned my single girl friends about this but they got snarky and said I was old fashioned. Then one boy friend split leaving her with a mortgage she could not afford. Tell these women that women have rights if they are married but none if they are not.
Sad for the men to marry used goods, women who are ‘forward’ and choose to shack up don’t deserve marriage
Under current laws, entering into ANY financial deal with a women you are in a relationship with is playing Russian roulette with a loaded gun.
House is in her name...🤷🏽♀️
Depends on the states common law.
Doubt he has rights though, without a contract. She has ownership.
Just reading a lot of comments about not buying a house before your married, I do agree but it can work for some, 10 years ago I bought a house with my boyfriend about 6 years later we got married and now have a beautiful baby also we now have no mortgage.
He has a weak legal claim. The burden is on him to prove that there was an agreement.
Shack up all you want. The problem is not that they are not married but he is NOT on title! He is not on title because he had BAD credit and would not be able to get financing that is why she is the only one on title. Maybe he should have cleaned up his credit/finances BEFORE buying a house alternatively he could have married her. Marry someone because he can't get his name on a house and this would protect his interests! Yikes! Not buy a house!
The one who says "we don't need a piece of paper to love each other" first is the one who pays less.
I had a family member who thought it was just a piece of paper until that person died. Family tossed her on her ear
Why would you commit to a mortgage with someone if you aren't even sure that you want to be with forever? that sounds like a big commitment with someone you aren't ready to commit to
since you are not on the note, she can say it's her house, Robb you and owe you nothing. She can sell and take the money for herself. your not on the note
Daniel Garcia but she’s respectable enough to split it. She’s a good one for that
Hi It's me a promise is a comfort to a fool.
I had same problem, wish i see this show long time ago.
Dave Ramsey is more of a couples counselor than a financial guru lol 😂
Did it on a handshake? I think they did it on something else. 😆
Plus, her future partner would not want to live in a house she bought with an ex.
I guess you know the future. 🙄.
I'd let it go if my name wasn't on the note anyway. Why carry baggage?
Because he has thousands of dollars invested in the deal.
@@TILLEYJS I prefer peace of mind. Who hasn't spend at least tens if not hundreds of thousands dating in their life anyway?
A fool and money are soon parted.
@@TILLEYJS Still, way too much baggage. I'd do it on the lump sum + payments with the idea that if the payments didn't come I'd write it off. Much cheaper and less baggage than the lawyer. No need to leave on bad terms.
Sell the house, 50/50. What's the big deal?
That’s not a difficult problem. The solution is to sell the property or she must refinance and pay his half out if she badly want to stay in that house.
Avoid making use of lawyers as it will cost you too much in the end.
She doesn't owe him one single dime if his name is nowhere on the paperwork.
Janet Williams I think he can can still get his half back if he has proof he was making payment towards the bond.
If he was withdrawing the money and giving it to her cash, he played himself.
@@sixmabona that's called rent. So so wouldn't help. Only if his state has common laws that give him rights.
Foreshadowing, Dave "some things are predictable"......
NEVER buy a house with someone you aren't married to. How many times has Dave said that??
Dave does not like people playing house, me neither.
How about whoever loses in rock paper scissors. I'll even give you a best out of 3
Am I the only one who wouldn't want to live in a house I shared with an ex? Talk about too many emotions wrapped up in one space.
Wouldn't it be easier for them to get back together?
This happened to me and luckily she signed a quitclaim deed.
People thinking it’s stupid to not live together before marriage act as if are overwhelming odds your marriage will end in divorce and alimony
In the past, when people were more religious in the USA, marriage was seen as spiritual union between man and a woman. Divorces were frowned upon, and you were a pariah if you split. Not saying right or wrong, that's pretty much how it was. Now, a marriage license whether it be from a religious ceremony, or a justice of the peace, it's a financial contract. (Don't believe me, go through a divorce now) - qdro, child support, alimony, all about the money!
That happened in 1980 thanks to feminism
My gut is, the guy has no legal right to the house.
Assuming everything he says is true, he’s got 50% in that house.
In a state that recognizes common law marriage, he might have a chance.
It’s not so much they weren’t married but that he wasn’t on the deed of the house. It’s all in her name, he just contributed to the house without there being any contract or anything. You can buy a property with your significant other without being married but you should BOTH sign on the dotted line so as to avoid this confusion.
Dude should've known better. I hope he gets it sorted out.
I've been burned in a much smaller amount, and that opened my eyes to the reality.
Either she refinances and pays him in full, or they sell the house and split the proceeds. If she squawks, go to court for a petition to force the sale. Simple.
It's easy to say "make her sell the house" but she can sabotage the deal if she really doesn't want to sell. If she's still living there, she can make it difficult for the realtor to show the house and she can keep it in a less-than-pristine viewing condition to put off potential buyers.
she can get away with not giving him a dime. This is the price he pays not shacking up. Spouses have legal rights. Shack up idiots have no legal rights to a house if their name is not on the deed. Next time get married or do not shack up.
I hope the guy is in a better situation in other relationship.
That didn't sound like what he said sounds like she owns the home and is titled to her and her mortgage, and he has just been paying rent for a while...he might just be entitled to nothing
Playing house doesnt work
This is quite a no brainer: get a lawyer. Going to have to get one to get this sorted out legally since you entered into it 50/50 but with no name on the mortgage sort of did yourself a major disservice...
Sad. This is worst case scenario....
Feel bad for this guy! Been there. Done that!
Renting an apartment together cool. But buying.. a breakup turns to a transaction and in the Un married phase it could happen at any moment.
Good advise to the young man.
If only there was a way to get someone else to own the house and get money in exchange.
Is his name on the deed ? Not on the loan but does he have proof of his paying his share of the mortgage or, did he just have an expensive rent
I live with my ex-wife in the house I bought with my money and is in my name. If things go south again there is nothing to negotiate because it is my house.
Question: do you live in a state that recognize common law marriage? She can argue that in court and get half. And if she's your ex-wife then she has a number of years living with you...
What great advice!
never ever buy a house unless you are married
Why is it “weird” for her and her future husband to make payments? If he was paying her alimony, she would be okay with that.
Not necessarily. They like the money not the constant reminder of the past.
I agree with you there Dave.
my ex g/f and i bought a condo together and went our separate ways amicably. we were both on the note/deed/mortgage, whatever, and we both made a nice profit. i have nothing against marriage or married people but am so disgusted and angry things are better for married vs non married couples and singles. the laws and rules should be the same for all. you didn't earn anything more because you got married. sheesh. you got married. you did not split the atom. get over yourselves
haha same here. I called my ex my unwanted business partner when we broke up. All in all though I wouldn't do it again, too risky.
No living together cost more and waste each others time and money when you break up. Hate to break it to you but married people are raising better kids in the long run hence the tax break. And you do have a problem with married people or you wouldn't be bitching in the first place snowflake, so get over yourself.
a break up costs more than a divorce? what planet are you from? good parents are good parents, bad parents are bad parents, marital status is irrelevant, and not every couple married or not has kids. i merely made an observation. if you think that was bitching you have very thin skin
judas brute thank you! my relationship with my partner is just as real and important than people who are married
see website and facebook page for "unmarried equality". good info and stories there
Agreed! His intro is annoying! lol
Can't commit to marriage but can commit to buying a house together. Perplexing.🤔
Vincent has no good guy friends.
She needs to unnderstand that if they sell they have equity and she will make a profit. With the profit she can save and get her credit in order and buy something else. It is amazing how she is making demands and has bad credit. She can't afford what she wants. Why do adults think they can have what they want when they cant buy it themselves. She is expecting her ex to give her what she wants. If she had her finances straight she might have been able to do this for hersellf. It is rediculous that people want independence but want to whine and complain and expect a someone else who has no obligation to them to pick up the slack. I'm a woman and would want a man to tell me the truth. I would be telling him the truth in a loving way. Did she listen during the relationship on how she managed her finances. I liked the advice Dave. Give her a chance to do thre righr thing without a lawyer taking a cut. Hope she takes the deal.
My Way because everyone got a trophy in the school she went to
I am sorry to say this but a lot of women do tend to think this way and that is why many women's credit is not good. A lot of women have college debt and other credit card debts. For some reason, women just love to consume and I am saying this as an old frugal woman without debt, thank God!
"Don't buy a house with someone you are not married to..." sharing this tip with today's generation is like kryptonite to Superman...it would kill them to get into a legal contract with their partner. "Love is enough", they say. Yeah right...how's that working out for you??🤔
And it’s not even love most of the time the women is used …. Basically the man gets the benefits of a wife from her at her prime without the responsibilities or expense
She played him
They did a little more than a handshake
Becky Migdal ~ That’s what I thought. Lust is blind.
People who are business partners buy properties together ALL the time and are not married. The mistake they made was going into the situation without thinking of it as a business. They should have had a clear idea as to what would happen if it didn't work. I feel the biggest mistake is marrying the wrong person and the way divorce statistics are in America... it seems like we've mastered that one.
This psychologist who started eHarmony said he did it in order to match compatible people and try to reduce the divorce rate
Done move out till you sell the property together.
how can I call the show
I agree with not buying a house with a gf, but wouldn't divorce fees cost more than 3,000?
You shouldn’t marry someone who is has been a gf and has a body count instead of saving herself for the one
@@luisfernando5998 agreed but that wasn't my point
@@justme87999 if you married someone like that who saved herself then there should be no divorce and hence your point will become invalid
@@luisfernando5998 no there's other reasons for divorce. I'm guessing you're a Tate fan lol
It’s not about what she want !!!! Thank you!
She seams she wants to work something out where she stays. She likes the house.
Probably live in the house without paying any bills.
A lot of close-minded people here. Me and my Wife bought our house before we were married we've been together for 7 years no issues. I know 2 couples who have done the same thing they are both fine and still together, and I've known couples who bought the house once they were married now they're not.
It's not close minded, it's about the tangled mess if you break up. Marriage has legal means of separating property.
HE WAS A ROOM MATE.