Boyfriend Left Me With All Our Loans

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  • Опубліковано 13 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,3 тис.

  • @TheRamseyShow
    @TheRamseyShow  7 років тому +77

    Make sure to hit the subscribe button and thanks for watching! ua-cam.com/users/DaveRamseyShow

    • @niecybaby1960
      @niecybaby1960 5 років тому +2

      The Dave Ramsey Show You’d think these people calling in would know their debt! I’d never call in with the ton of bills I have without knowing what they are! Dave you’ve got the patience of Job! I’m well over $100,000 in debt but I’m coming out thanks to God and you and I haven’t even begun yet! I’m ready to be obedient! Thanks! Pray for me please...

    • @legesupra4275
      @legesupra4275 5 років тому +1

      do you ever pay your callers?
      they give you free show. and material.... what do you do ?

    • @jarred333Boss
      @jarred333Boss 5 років тому

      godd

    • @misslindarodgers9310
      @misslindarodgers9310 4 роки тому

      @Cody Stephenson you

    • @giniroyasha
      @giniroyasha 4 роки тому

      @Cody Stephenson Is 3% gonna make you richer?

  • @MP-nj1qy
    @MP-nj1qy 4 роки тому +1842

    My ex boyfriend, who had a bankruptcy history, asked me to co-sign an 80K car loan. I’m so grateful I ran fast enough. 🙏🏽

    • @majoliefleur9297
      @majoliefleur9297 4 роки тому +169

      80K car loan!!!!!! I’m glad too!

    • @emilyc1988
      @emilyc1988 4 роки тому +74

      holy
      wow. he would of took your $80k and ran

    • @deesalmon9632
      @deesalmon9632 4 роки тому +81

      80k?!?!? You made the right choice. I make about 90k+ a year and I would NEVER get a car that cost that much

    • @abbasjoy4785
      @abbasjoy4785 4 роки тому +59

      That's ridiculous!! He filed bankruptcy and wants a $80K car!! Glad you ran

    • @fryax6721
      @fryax6721 4 роки тому +27

      @@majoliefleur9297 if you are buying a car that is 80k, you might as well wait till you have it in cash, 80k loan sounds like financial suicide

  • @BernadetteTeachesMusic
    @BernadetteTeachesMusic 6 років тому +1257

    She’s gonna make it. Instead of being defeated she got a second job and she called Dave and asked for help. She shared personal stuff on the radio because she knows in the end it will be good for her.

    • @nmc1859
      @nmc1859 4 роки тому +32

      And she said shes a Christian, do no more playing house!! Good for her❣

    • @natha320
      @natha320 4 роки тому +14

      This world is runned by strong women!

    • @manjitkapri1816
      @manjitkapri1816 4 роки тому +7

      @@natha320 wait what?

    • @claudiatapia8310
      @claudiatapia8310 3 роки тому +7

      Yeah, Dave gave her hope to track the rippo sold amount to cut her debt and she sounded that in the end it will be good for her. A lovely way to pull her out of her mess :))

    • @macummings7818
      @macummings7818 3 роки тому +5

      Your comment is so generous - made me tear up.
      ~ big virtual hug to you and all of us who are rooting for growth, second chances and a bit of kindness!

  • @basketballplayer4978
    @basketballplayer4978 5 років тому +2850

    I’m 19 been watching this channel for a week now and I’ve come to the conclusion to avoid loans at all cost

    • @sandrallewellyn2632
      @sandrallewellyn2632 5 років тому +144

      True, but if you absolutely needed a loan(say for a medical emergency) that wouldn't make you a failure or fiscally irresponsible.

    • @Mscoloraturakae
      @Mscoloraturakae 5 років тому +198

      Pro tip: never live with someone you're romantically involved with if you're not married. This whole "well you have live with someone to know if you want to marry them" line that's being sold is a bunch of BS. It only puts you at risk emotionally and financially. DON'T DO IT! And you're right- pay cash for everything, and only take loans out when you know you can pay it back.

    • @Nangfah_Alex
      @Nangfah_Alex 5 років тому +2

      Same

    • @barbararepko4824
      @barbararepko4824 5 років тому +34

      Basketball Player Not all loans are bad, just have to be careful.

    • @Superawesomeyoutubechannel
      @Superawesomeyoutubechannel 5 років тому +8

      Basketball Player nah not if ur investing in real estate

  • @jvolstad
    @jvolstad 7 років тому +3259

    If you are not married, don't play house.

  • @karenhardie1132
    @karenhardie1132 7 років тому +1606

    Dave is very kind to this lady. His empathy is positive and hopeful.

    • @antbanks415
      @antbanks415 6 років тому +42

      if it was a dude who got played, he wouldn't have empathy and compassion.

    • @mandyschmidt7164
      @mandyschmidt7164 6 років тому +11

      antbanks415 poor baby can only play what if games

    • @RoyArrowood
      @RoyArrowood 5 років тому +15

      @@antbanks415 Search Ex-girlfriend dumped $50000 of debt on me. He is still kind to the guy (Dave always is) but the differences are pretty stark. He doesn't send him to FPU, doesn't say I'm sorry or that she cheated him and the call is wrapped up quicker.

    • @jacobswiney9977
      @jacobswiney9977 5 років тому +5

      men are suppose to be tough

    • @zeynand4039
      @zeynand4039 5 років тому +7

      @@RoyArrowood maybe it has to dk with this girl being a waitresse, so not alot of chances for more income.
      I heard dave speak to a guy witj 100k kn college debt without diploma. The guys voice was shaking on the phone. He was nice to the guy, don't remember if he was send to FPU but he was helping him find jobs that pay more then you'd realize, to still have a future. That stood out to me.

  • @lavinder11
    @lavinder11 6 років тому +2295

    Why are non-married couples mixing money like this?

    • @OikPoinFive
      @OikPoinFive 6 років тому +66

      microspect they mean getting loans within 0 to 2 years of dating. Too fast.

    • @mattmickle1296
      @mattmickle1296 6 років тому +162

      People can argue the morality of cohabiting all day.
      But if the relationship is not serious enough at this point to get married, it’s an awful idea for people to sign 5, 15 or 30 year financial obligations with that other person.

    • @FuturePsychNurse
      @FuturePsychNurse 6 років тому +26

      microspect In Canada it’s only 2 years, I’m sorry I require marriage for all that!

    • @sl4983
      @sl4983 5 років тому +40

      microspect, that's California. But who wants to be considered a spouse by default and desperation?

    • @tommycastro9424
      @tommycastro9424 5 років тому +4

      LM Djnchen Democrats and Republicans...they both have similar you spend x time you are married laws in their majority states lol rip

  • @Feebysworld
    @Feebysworld 6 років тому +340

    It makes me cry when he says, "I'm gonna walk with you kiddo." It's really sometimes all of us want to hear. I'm not crying now. Ok. I am.

    • @jeanlaubenthal698
      @jeanlaubenthal698 3 роки тому +4

      Me too.

    • @jessicam.9348
      @jessicam.9348 2 роки тому +5

      Agreed. It always makes me choke up. Sometimes that's all we need to hear.

    • @Irod567
      @Irod567 8 днів тому

      Why get so emotional over total stranger's dumb decisions?

  • @ilovenyc2129
    @ilovenyc2129 7 років тому +2317

    This is why i didnt want to cosign for my bfs car loan. No ring no putting my name on loans

    • @Vydio
      @Vydio 7 років тому +85

      Be aware, it will impact your credit rating. Even if he never misses a payment the debt will count against you until it's gone.

    • @icereidy6586
      @icereidy6586 6 років тому +14

      ilovenyc2129 amen

    • @nicogreco7110
      @nicogreco7110 6 років тому +65

      In marriage, it's one thing since your money is your spouse's money too. However same last name could also be a relative, and as much as it might hurt, never co-sign even for family.
      It can be a nasty world out there. One misfortune of the death of said family relative means you are now on the hook for their loan whereas it would've just gone away. What a way to rub salt in the wounds!

    • @dinaheart8021
      @dinaheart8021 6 років тому +10

      ilovenyc2129 good job Nancy you have some sense

    • @dinaheart8021
      @dinaheart8021 6 років тому +13

      Which a lot of females lack

  • @amosiren
    @amosiren 4 роки тому +188

    Ironically, finances were what finally make me leave my abusive relationship. Every single month it was a fight to get his tiny portion of the rent (I paid all other bills working 2 jobs) and his name wasn't on the lease. By almost the end of the year I was so terrified he was going to get us evicted, I put in my 30 day move out notice. I just finally woke up and said "you ruined my life, I'm not letting you ruin my credit" haha, sounds silly but it set me free!!!

    • @MP-oz7yk
      @MP-oz7yk 2 роки тому +5

      Good for you! Strategic and you stuck to your plan 🙌🙌🙌

    • @Aaron-hg8jo
      @Aaron-hg8jo 2 роки тому +3

      I'm happy that you got out of there

    • @AnnabellaRedwood
      @AnnabellaRedwood 2 місяці тому +1

      I'm so proud of you. That took so much strength.

  • @koreanlover1015
    @koreanlover1015 4 роки тому +515

    At least she didn't get prego. Thank Jesus🙏🏾

    • @Bellaexe5091
      @Bellaexe5091 4 роки тому +10

      Too bad she didnt. Easy child support

    • @shawmeck9323
      @shawmeck9323 4 роки тому +2

      @@Bellaexe5091 yea too bad for her.

    • @cesarsavage4538
      @cesarsavage4538 4 роки тому +4

      @@Bellaexe5091 love ur mindset

    • @cannonball134
      @cannonball134 4 роки тому +45

      Yeah. This totally sounds like the type of guy who makes consistent child support payments 🙄🙄🙄

    • @tashawilliams8093
      @tashawilliams8093 4 роки тому +1

      I know right.

  • @pattyinsandiego8573
    @pattyinsandiego8573 7 років тому +486

    "I've gotcha kiddo" Dave has such a kind heart.

    • @hawihawi9260
      @hawihawi9260 5 років тому +17

      I love when he says that to callers. He sounds love a loving dad

    • @dawnoheee9524
      @dawnoheee9524 5 років тому +6

      I hope she takes the classes he offered her.

  • @BrianaBudgets
    @BrianaBudgets Рік тому +21

    I appreciate that Dave isn’t beating her while she’s down.

  • @lyrisgreenidge-adams5941
    @lyrisgreenidge-adams5941 7 років тому +714

    Not married and having joint accounts and credit cards together is a no-no! Too bad she didn't have some of this advise before but I hope she learns this hard lesson.

    • @CorinnaAtHome
      @CorinnaAtHome 7 років тому +35

      Lyris Greenidge-Adams even married it can be a bad idea..

    • @lyrisgreenidge-adams5941
      @lyrisgreenidge-adams5941 7 років тому +32

      Sometimes yes , in some relationship. It depends on the trust and integrity of both parties.

    • @sg6828
      @sg6828 7 років тому +21

      I personally don't want to get married to my partner anytime soon because it would put both of us in a higher tax bracket thus higher taxes, but we bought a home and combined finances after meeting with a lawyer for a contract to detail what happens financially if things go sour. Additionally, we live beneath our means so we're saving instead of racking up debt. Maybe after the house is paid off we'll tie the knot ;)

    • @shalalala868
      @shalalala868 6 років тому +21

      What if God forbid something happens to him while you're shacking up? If you plan to pay off the house rapidly..ok..but it's quite a gamble to live together forever and not get married. You won't have the same rights as a wife.

    • @staceyj3667
      @staceyj3667 6 років тому +2

      @@sg6828 smart moves

  • @rkirkend
    @rkirkend 7 років тому +254

    I love how Dave is no-nonsense yet compassionate when taking calls.

    • @fferguson2013
      @fferguson2013 4 роки тому +1

      Same here and I am cleaning up my mess with or without a boyfriend and don't have any relationship in me no more after he died.

  • @fpl_bailey
    @fpl_bailey 7 років тому +464

    Another reason *NOT* to play house

  • @boratpajama
    @boratpajama 7 років тому +1132

    Don't play house. It's such a terrible idea.
    Don't sign a contract for ANYTHING unless you share a last name through marriage.

    • @iwishpeoplewouldmindtheiro4601
      @iwishpeoplewouldmindtheiro4601 7 років тому +22

      That is no guarantee

    • @herryfrd2740
      @herryfrd2740 7 років тому +79

      Nothing wrong with playing house, feel free to live together and split expenses down the middle. My fiance' and i lived together for years in our early 20's prior to getting engaged, and we always made sure that whatever we bought together, if something happened with the other person, one of us could safely afford the expense. So when we rented a place, it had to be in a price range where if someone lost a job, or got goofy and decided to leave, it wouldn't destroy anyone financially. That said, we never went into debt for each other. If my fiance' walked out today or vice versa, it would not majorly affect our finances. The issue is, most young adults are naiive about money, and they're really bad about communicating their financial situation to their partner

    • @KhoalBishop
      @KhoalBishop 7 років тому +32

      Herryfrd I agree with you 100%. IMO thats the best wsy to live. NEVER put yourself in a position to depend on anyone.

    • @crowtservo
      @crowtservo 6 років тому +18

      SJ Just don’t get joint accounts with anyone until there’s some rings on your fingers.

    • @emilyc1988
      @emilyc1988 6 років тому +1

      moocher

  • @mammothorbust
    @mammothorbust 7 років тому +553

    Dave is a hero of mine because of calls like these. He knew she needed encouragement so he gives it to her, then talks about the steps she needs to take. Good man.

  • @daniela.2349
    @daniela.2349 6 років тому +672

    Right now I have all my debs paid off and +$3400 savings thanks to Dave

    • @TheToadChild
      @TheToadChild 6 років тому +14

      Daniel A. Yay Daniel, way to go!

    • @poordolt6482
      @poordolt6482 5 років тому +9

      Is 3400 $ savings considered alot in the USA because i can't really relate because in germany there are no student loans so i had as mich savings since i was 17

    • @LaDeeDah
      @LaDeeDah 5 років тому +8

      Thanks to yourself. Give yourself some credit 💓

    • @hawihawi9260
      @hawihawi9260 5 років тому +1

      Good job

    • @vitorfernandes651
      @vitorfernandes651 5 років тому

      Why? You were not capable of planning life? It's easy if you want to save 1000 per month. Then do not touch that money no matter what. Easy.

  • @TheToadChild
    @TheToadChild 6 років тому +230

    Ladies and gentlemen please learn the lesson this woman gave. If you don’t have a life together you should not play house together.

    • @kimberlysmall4932
      @kimberlysmall4932 5 років тому

      marriage binds debt in USA. Better to not get married.

    • @mikejackson7881
      @mikejackson7881 5 років тому +13

      @@kimberlysmall4932 or just don't accumulate debt so you have stress. Free life lol

    • @5000MikeMaster
      @5000MikeMaster 5 років тому +5

      kimberly small or get a pre nup for your marriage

    • @Preservestlandry
      @Preservestlandry 4 роки тому +4

      How is getting married going to stop him from using her and financially abusing her? It won't. He's a user either way.

    • @karfeishaolyia9567
      @karfeishaolyia9567 Рік тому

      Thats what happen to me

  • @pamperedgurl
    @pamperedgurl 7 років тому +1014

    Her ex will reap what he sows for doing that to this woman. I know she will pull through.

    • @steve41557
      @steve41557 6 років тому +82

      Sadly, I think he'll just find someone new and gullible and do it to her too, and the next one.

    • @steverich4005
      @steverich4005 6 років тому +45

      nah..he will do just fine..

    • @andytaylor1588
      @andytaylor1588 6 років тому +14

      Karma.

    • @theprovincial
      @theprovincial 6 років тому +26

      I'm not buying that the credit card is all his. It's easy to blame someone who's not there, but without details it's all hearsay

    • @wlonsdale1
      @wlonsdale1 5 років тому +7

      Andy Taylor no such thing.

  • @AisforAlibi1
    @AisforAlibi1 5 років тому +109

    First of all, don't shack up. Second of all, NEVER EVER comingle funds with someone you aren't married to. Even then, be cautious.

    • @pinkgal206
      @pinkgal206 5 років тому

      Exactly... what was she thinking?

    • @BusArch42
      @BusArch42 4 роки тому

      @Pinky your wife was lucky. I was too. I took a gamble on a good man who was 1.5 year gross salary in debt. He also was financially helping his mom and half sister who was born when he was an adult. I went from way in the black to way in the red. I’m happy now and we are 26 years married. However if I knew then what I know now I would not have married him unless things changed before hand.

    • @vixxcottage
      @vixxcottage 3 роки тому

      Janet you are so right. There are users out there. Be cautious! Think first. Hard when emotions are involved.

  • @josephthorsen2968
    @josephthorsen2968 9 місяців тому +5

    Dear Dave,
    Thank you for being compassionate. We can be such fools, hurting badly,. And yes! we need stern practical guidance to get us out of trouble, but a kind word gives us hope.

  • @munhl
    @munhl 7 років тому +600

    Come on Natalia you got this, you can do this, pay the debts off, have savings and a retirement fund. You're just 27 there's time enough for you to become a millionaire.

    • @sheba1307
      @sheba1307 5 років тому +1

      Mungo Lewis 👍

    • @DinaStrange
      @DinaStrange 5 років тому

      LOL

    • @insideoutsideupsidedown2218
      @insideoutsideupsidedown2218 5 років тому +5

      Mungo Lewis shes got time to become a multi millionaire....

    • @zeynand4039
      @zeynand4039 5 років тому

      But as a woman you still might want kids and you need steady income.

    • @twdjt6245
      @twdjt6245 4 роки тому +2

      Zeyna Nd exactly. That’s my biggest fear as a single 28 year old with debt..... (though it’s not a whole lot) it’s different for us women because that biological clock starts ticking faster...while men could just get a younger woman to start a family later on with if they wanted to. Oh well...don’t think I’d ever be so desperate as to go for marrying a man that I can’t see myself being with forever.... so at the very least I’d like to become financially stable sooner than later in order to have the option to later have or adopt/foster children on my own, if it comes to that.

  • @dianeteppert8534
    @dianeteppert8534 3 роки тому +96

    I'm sure this happens a lot. When I bought my house and car. They couldn't believe that boyfriend wasn't going to be part of loans. I can pay for it on my own. He's supportive but I'm buying what I can afford on my own. Maybe we will be more some day but not now. I'm not living with anyone I'm not married to. I've got rules. Good guys don't mind rules.

    • @ernieellan5694
      @ernieellan5694 3 роки тому +3

      Well those lending to you are playing a game with you. They want to get as many suckers on the line for the loans that they can. They will put pressure on you saying whatever to try to get someone else to cosign etc. I would seriously not do business with either in the future.

    • @lynnebucher6537
      @lynnebucher6537 3 роки тому +6

      That's so sexist. They'd never say that to a man.

    • @johncoll4456
      @johncoll4456 3 роки тому +3

      Excellent comment.

    • @matthewgardner2144
      @matthewgardner2144 3 роки тому +1

      Who's the 'they'? If you were financing a house and car independently, why would anyone suggest you put another person on the loans?

    • @dianeteppert8534
      @dianeteppert8534 Рік тому

      I bought the house and then the car separately. I had similar conversations when buying both.

  • @Irene-gq4jr
    @Irene-gq4jr 5 років тому +132

    Re playing house versus getting married: even if married, your spouse can clear out a joint account or rack up bills on a joint credit card and you still own the debt if they walk out. Fiscally reckless people get married too.

    • @NerdyGal_https
      @NerdyGal_https 4 роки тому +9

      No it's not the same. Being married she'd be treated differently in the legal sense.

    • @schondra1993
      @schondra1993 3 роки тому +10

      Marriage would've helped her protect herself alot better!

    • @vyspeeds
      @vyspeeds 3 роки тому +1

      @@schondra1993 how?

    • @awenzel222wenzel7
      @awenzel222wenzel7 3 роки тому +3

      So true! At least if they were married she would have only been on the hook for half rather than $25000.

    • @paulinoaz
      @paulinoaz 3 роки тому +6

      When you are married and go through a divorce then the debts are split between the two by the courts, you are no longer responsible for their half

  • @belowthetamaracks
    @belowthetamaracks 7 років тому +228

    Dave, you're great for helping and not judging!

    • @WISHBONEL7
      @WISHBONEL7 5 років тому +5

      Amanda Mancini - He is definitely a lot more mellow and understanding than he was 23 years ago when I first heard him . However , it is impossible to go through life without making judgements .

    • @cm01
      @cm01 4 роки тому +5

      He's more gentle the more defeated sounding the caller is as well.

    • @3skFq7pSM8tcFfF
      @3skFq7pSM8tcFfF 4 роки тому +3

      I want to be like how dave is. Helping Others.

  • @stringerbell1702
    @stringerbell1702 4 роки тому +42

    This is like having a boyfriend that ask you to rent an apartment only in your name, but he wants to live there, and tear up the place and blast the heat. He breaks up with you, and stick you with the high bills. 😣

    • @jonsmith9728
      @jonsmith9728 2 роки тому

      Well many woman like “bad boys” and hate nice guys, this is like saying your shocked the sun came out today…. What do you expect?

    • @catherinewilke5583
      @catherinewilke5583 10 місяців тому

      Hobosexuals 😂

    • @205rider8
      @205rider8 7 місяців тому

      @@jonsmith9728So true. Unfortunately they must reap what they sow.

  • @gangatalishis
    @gangatalishis 6 років тому +103

    This woman just got played. Simple as that.

    • @bsa2506
      @bsa2506 5 років тому +7

      She was trying to be decent to someone she loved!!! He PLAYED HIMSELF 😎😎😎

  • @noname89636
    @noname89636 6 років тому +52

    I don't care if I am married, I will NEVER co-sign on anything that is not a mortgage, or second mortgage. If you do, you are stupid. There is no such thing as love when it comes to money.

    • @autumnspring6624
      @autumnspring6624 5 років тому +2

      prayl00185 Absolute truth!

    • @maryfurr7565
      @maryfurr7565 5 років тому +1

      I made the mistake of designing once.....NEVER AGAIN.

    • @Aaron-hg8jo
      @Aaron-hg8jo 2 роки тому

      What do you guys think about cosigning for a sibling, child, or parent?

  • @MrsTX79
    @MrsTX79 5 років тому +20

    Dave is so encouraging and positive! She woman called in feeling so low but he totally boosted her confidence to take her life back.

  • @michelhanson1500
    @michelhanson1500 7 років тому +210

    OUCH! I know how that feels. My mom left me in a similar situation with the bank and promised to pay me back for years now. NOPE. Don't worry mom's still alive and my debts are paid off now. At least she will learn just as well as how I learned the new favorite curse word: NO! NEVER EVER TRUST FAMILY AND FRIENDS WITH OTHER PEOPLE'S MONEY. If you want to give your boyfriend money from your bank account, fine, but NEVER EVER go into getting a loan for him.

    • @kimberlysmall4932
      @kimberlysmall4932 5 років тому +13

      Family is just as bad as acquaintances. Just because someone says I love you does not mean it is true.

    • @LoveLife-oo9cz
      @LoveLife-oo9cz 5 років тому +4

      @@kimberlysmall4932 Exactly! Sad but true...

    • @chrysichrysi7889
      @chrysichrysi7889 5 років тому +1

      Thankfully I can say, I'd trust my mom because she's proven to me that I can trust her and she can trust me because I worked very hard over the years on proving that to her as well which I'm very grateful for. Trust is one of the most important aspects in any relationship with anybody and something the majority unfortunatly take for granted until they figure out, they are the ones who nobody trusts anymore. It's a lesson many people still need to learn.

    • @roychavez9676
      @roychavez9676 5 років тому

      @@LoveLife-oo9cz 0lfdse . 123r456u8op0pppppppppp000000kmbgsaz ngfbjbz. Bnghjggjt34 you 566uu5775688yy898uhi9633e678o00oi88iijjjjjnji998654hn cgnkgthlkfcjt boumlmmmmmmkkhb59ht 7 wi

    • @Sayonararuiz
      @Sayonararuiz 4 роки тому +3

      I actually can trust my family but I still never let them borrow money. You never know what’s going to pop up. Just like they’re needing money because something popped up. I’m very low income but I’m the better saver. I’ve been asked for $100 to $1,000 so far. $2,000 is almost my emergency fund so no I’m not giving that up.

  • @morecringe89
    @morecringe89 5 років тому +13

    I love this guy. He could hammer her, but he focused on try to helping her and other people in their situation. Admirable.

  • @TemeryN
    @TemeryN 7 років тому +50

    Oh Dave, your heart for and with this caller is just wonderful! Yah we all pay "stupid tax" and hopefully learn from it. TY for helping this lady with such kindness and compassion =)

  • @macummings7818
    @macummings7818 3 роки тому +10

    I’m so sorry for this girl’s embarrassing situation. Gosh, sending up a prayer for her to get through and turn herself around.
    And kudos to her for being willing to expose herself on this national show, poor thing.
    💔

  • @jimroscovius
    @jimroscovius 5 років тому +24

    Don't buy stuff together when you're not married. Period.

  • @kokoskokso
    @kokoskokso 3 роки тому +13

    The term "Financial abuse" is very real in many relationships, unfortunately.

  • @Elizabeth-uj8vn
    @Elizabeth-uj8vn 7 років тому +76

    This guy is a piece of work. My ex husband was the same way. Took a hot tub from me promising to make payments. Stupid me I let him. Needless to say he didn't make the payments and hid the tub from me! Hard lesson learned.. 😒

    • @lionessnala2000
      @lionessnala2000 6 років тому +18

      Sorry...but my ex husband did the same. He left and refused to pay any of the debt we had together. Refused to pay for court fees when i filed for divorce. Some people are evil🤬

    • @JF32304
      @JF32304 6 років тому +9

      Majority of women want a guy to fix and not someone that is already fixed. They're attracted to the problems and say...I can make him better instead of staying I want someone that doesn't need any of that... That's wisdom!

    • @kimberlysmall4932
      @kimberlysmall4932 5 років тому +2

      @@lionessnala2000 I do not understand these men who refuse things...they play hard ball with bullheadedness but it seems that could be used in court against them. (depends on circumstance I suppose)

    • @johncoll4456
      @johncoll4456 5 років тому

      The sooner you get these kinds of lessons, the better.

    • @iliadiliad6028
      @iliadiliad6028 4 роки тому

      I find this situation funny and sad! Sounds like something out of a crazy hillbilly movie, hiding a hot tub!
      BTW just out of curiosity how did you find out it was hidden? Did you actually go to location and look for the hot tub?
      Anyway, you are lucky enough to be rid of a fool like that, and it was an error on your part to agree to prolong your relationship with him in form of a loan+transaction for the hot tub... Why not call it a day! I so curious even if you were paying it off why bother! Goodbye forever, unless you have children, then forgive the hot tub, keep civil and never again mix financially!
      This is hilarious! 😂😂🤣👍

  • @sasasavage5047
    @sasasavage5047 6 років тому +203

    I'm not even taking out a car loan in my name for a husband. I can't imagine doing it for a boyfriend.

    • @cm01
      @cm01 4 роки тому +4

      If you were smart you'd take the loan out in both your names, of course that's ignoring the fact that you shouldn't have a loan at all

    • @tashawilliams8093
      @tashawilliams8093 4 роки тому +1

      Exactly.

    • @michellerichardson3090
      @michellerichardson3090 4 роки тому +8

      I won't even take one out for myself lol

  • @MrJohnisthename
    @MrJohnisthename 6 років тому +28

    Wisdom comes from pain, pain comes from experience, experience comes from necessity, and necessity comes from living.

  • @KnowUrEnemy
    @KnowUrEnemy 7 років тому +252

    Baby Step 0.5: If you want to become debt free, you should probably know exactly what debts you have and how much you owe on them. There should be no "uhmm," "hmmm," or "somewhere in the ballpark of.." when asked what your debts are.
    Can't manage that which you are unaware.

    • @yrellim
      @yrellim 6 років тому +6

      I am on the debt snow ball and as I look at 3 days before payday- then paid it 3 days later, then forget about it for a month. Then the payments change, interest on credit cards change the amount further I can't say the exact amount but know it's£10k

    • @sbrazenor2
      @sbrazenor2 5 років тому +6

      If you don't have a solid written list when you call in, it doesn't mean you don't know, it just means you're not prepared. The repo issue was one thing that's vague, but could be less severe than she expects.

    • @sarah3796
      @sarah3796 5 років тому +2

      I know right! It drove me crazy !!

    • @danielreeder62
      @danielreeder62 5 років тому +5

      Give the girl a break. She is hurting.

    • @Iworkwithnitwits
      @Iworkwithnitwits 6 місяців тому

      I periodically call my creditors to get the balance I owe or I look at statements.

  • @giselleduff1001
    @giselleduff1001 7 років тому +37

    What a sweet ending to that call. Nice one, "Uncle Dave"!

  • @warwagon
    @warwagon 7 років тому +62

    They really need a checklist of what to have written down before you call.

  • @desmondcastro3679
    @desmondcastro3679 6 років тому +7

    Dave is a true healer ! Speaks reality & is very supportive. Thanks for being you, brother.

  • @VeganJen
    @VeganJen 7 років тому +105

    you got this Natalia!!! kill this debt. you are going to be amazed at how much you can accomplish. I've been where you are. God has an awesome plan for you! praying for you!!!

    • @sheba1307
      @sheba1307 5 років тому +2

      VeganJen very sweet for you to say

    • @iamme50
      @iamme50 5 років тому +1

      ❤️

  • @hiimmidas
    @hiimmidas 7 років тому +269

    She sounds really nice.

    • @AndreaLKL72
      @AndreaLKL72 7 років тому +77

      J that's her problem. 😭 hopefully she doesn't get swindled again.

    • @hiimmidas
      @hiimmidas 7 років тому +27

      There's a difference between being smart and nice. She was not being smart handling her money as if she was married to the guy. It's ok to be nice and generous, as long as you're smart about it. Look at Bill Gates. The richest man in the USA. Incredibly smart. Incredibly nice. Incredibly generous.

    • @davidcadman4468
      @davidcadman4468 7 років тому +23

      she is nice... and will get smart... I did... it hurt, so it made me tougher... she will get better and the next guy that comes along won't find a weak push over, but a tough tiger....

    • @gangatalishis
      @gangatalishis 6 років тому +1

      J and that's why she was taken advantage of

    • @KMartha22
      @KMartha22 6 років тому +3

      She sounds lovely :)

  • @setha360
    @setha360 4 роки тому +13

    Once had a very new girlfriend wanting to go look at cars, went to a dealership, she fell in love with a car but had bad credit, salesman ask me to co-sign, I bailed on that short con, never ever co-sign

    • @Iworkwithnitwits
      @Iworkwithnitwits 6 місяців тому

      Salesman felt entitled to ask you that? That is nerve!!!

  • @msjay025
    @msjay025 3 роки тому +6

    Don’t ever co-sign for any one, not your husband, not your girl or boyfriend, not your children, not your siblings, no one.

  • @rothbj1
    @rothbj1 3 роки тому +14

    Dave can be impatient often, but he was very compassionate with this one.

  • @christinabernat9681
    @christinabernat9681 6 років тому +6

    God bless you for how beautifully you handled this caller, DR!

  • @gardenofe12
    @gardenofe12 4 роки тому +9

    Moral of the story NEVER co-sign ANYTHING for ANYONE unless you WANT to be financially responsible for it !!

  • @hhhunt777
    @hhhunt777 7 років тому +28

    He is so good! So encouraging.

  • @ChrisMFlorida
    @ChrisMFlorida 7 років тому +413

    She doesn't seem very sure about what she owes.

    • @EastCoastReefer
      @EastCoastReefer 7 років тому +72

      She’s not even sure how much she makes.

    • @Juhani139
      @Juhani139 6 років тому +35

      Doesn't seem sure about much. Had trouble answering simple questions. Shouldn't the person calling get documents and amounts ready before calling?

    • @UnknownUnknown-tu3be
      @UnknownUnknown-tu3be 6 років тому +103

      @@Juhani139People who got their life together aren't calling Dave.........

    • @Siferatu
      @Siferatu 6 років тому +22

      @@Juhani139 Dave's call screeners should have walked her through collecting this info before patching her through

    • @mmmmmvodka
      @mmmmmvodka 5 років тому +24

      Sounds like he made the decisions and she signed the contracts blindly. So yes. She doesn't know what's going on. Never did.

  • @jacquelinemilowski3444
    @jacquelinemilowski3444 7 років тому +139

    Hope she will get through this all right. ❤

    • @Madi4321
      @Madi4321 5 років тому +2

      Jacqueline Milowski first nice non judgemental comment

  • @AmishNinjaMaster
    @AmishNinjaMaster 7 років тому +8

    Sound financial advice and HOPE for this caller from The Dave Ramsey Show ... God bless Dave.

  • @shalalala868
    @shalalala868 6 років тому +25

    She allowed this guy to absolve himself from ALL responsibility by taking everything in her name and not even cosigning? WOWWWW

  • @MmM-hj3ym
    @MmM-hj3ym 7 років тому +26

    God bless her
    Praying for you. We've been there

  • @chasa4347
    @chasa4347 5 років тому +5

    Dave is so kind when folks like this call in. Very nice!

  • @skyrobin4008
    @skyrobin4008 5 років тому +20

    Dummies. Some people rather do all the activities of commitment without commitment... living together, kids, loans and debt. Madness.

  • @allthatsheiz
    @allthatsheiz 5 років тому +27

    I saw boyfriend and "our loans" and immediately was confused 😖

  • @thenikole1028
    @thenikole1028 7 років тому +35

    Why do people call she are not sure the exact amount of their debt. How is Dave suppose to help you when you dont know what you owe?

    • @BlackUnite
      @BlackUnite 7 років тому +4

      Exactly...it's like they calling in to try to make themselves feel like they're doing something

    • @chavezunseen
      @chavezunseen 7 років тому +1

      Nikki I agree with your comment, but unfortunately there are some naive people out there...like wow really? Lol

  • @gemsix876
    @gemsix876 5 років тому +3

    Proud of her for reaching out to Dave and taking control of her situation. We all make mistakes and she's learned, good for her and good for Dave for being so empathetic.

  • @red32303
    @red32303 5 років тому +22

    Playing house turned out to have real life consequences

  • @Inmywordz
    @Inmywordz 7 років тому +278

    She could of used that money to purchase a new man

  • @tocc
    @tocc 6 років тому +37

    This sounds like a judge judy case, but she would dismiss it, she hates non-married couples playing house.

  • @sanorris08
    @sanorris08 7 років тому +161

    I am shocked by all your comments on here about this woman! We have all made mistakes and had to pay the consequences. I guess, I understand, I have been in her situation and it sucks, but I learned!!! Our God is a wonderful and forgiving one and loves us! I am so thankful I am in a better place then I was and that God got hold of me❤️. Hang in there Natalia it does get better and easier, God Bless you!

    • @sanorris08
      @sanorris08 7 років тому +18

      Right, but how do we know she has not repented? Let's all take the speck out of our own eyes, before we take the speck out of our brother and or sister's eyes! I am just trying to say as Christians we should have more compassion for others. I am assuming everyone responding is a Christian, but maybe not

    • @amanecer7778
      @amanecer7778 6 років тому +6

      Sarah Forster Amen. Been there too.

    • @marywebb9127
      @marywebb9127 6 років тому +5

      Let's pray for her and her healing from the pain of a bad relationship. That God gives her wisdom and strength to rise from this to be a better woman.

    • @FuturePsychNurse
      @FuturePsychNurse 6 років тому +3

      Sarah Forster I’ve never been in her situation and would never put myself in a situation like that! Live together sure but why are you co signing for loans for a man who’s last name you don’t have?! 🤦🏾‍♀️🤣

    • @StephenieStDavis
      @StephenieStDavis 5 років тому +1

      At the beginning of the video, she mentioned, "Before I became a Christian..." Why assume that she hasn't repented? Now, she's suffering the natural consequences of her decisions and she seemed open and teachable to Dave's advice. I am thankful that Dave was kind to her, while still walking her through her next steps, logistically. Did she make an unwise decision? Of course. Does she still deserve kindness. Yes. She's 27. Some life lessons, unfortunately, are learned the hard way. But either way, she is deserving of compassion. :)

  • @johncoll4456
    @johncoll4456 3 роки тому +2

    Dave was kind and patient with this young woman. Kudos to Dave.

  • @blackworldtraveler3711
    @blackworldtraveler3711 7 років тому +559

    Got in a little too deep playing house.

    • @GoogleAccount00
      @GoogleAccount00 7 років тому +4

      BlackWorldTraveler yep

    • @TridentShield22
      @TridentShield22 7 років тому +2

      BlackWorldTraveler real deep

    • @pep590
      @pep590 7 років тому +9

      BlackWorldTraveler Playing house is what i call it too.

    • @erodz2943
      @erodz2943 7 років тому +39

      BlackWorldTraveler
      Oh please...my coworker had been playing house for almost 25 yrs. He passed away. He had life insurance and both had a joint savings account.
      Another co-worker who was married. Her husband left her and took all the money. They never put in the bank. They had it in a safe. They had over $40,000. So marriage is not a guarantee.

    • @pep590
      @pep590 7 років тому +31

      E Rodriguez Your playing house example is the rare, rare exception. Funny playing house 25 years and they still didn't really love each other. Your 2nd example, has nothing to do with marriage and all to do with two stupid people. Putting all of your money in a safe? Doesn't get any more foolish than that.

  • @queen.kristal8395
    @queen.kristal8395 6 років тому +60

    Even if I was married I would not put my name on anything besides property .Personal or credit card loans he can put his name on,but I'm not.Your name doesn't have to be on everything

  • @janiecel
    @janiecel 5 років тому +13

    I really struggle when people can’t answer questions straightforwardly. The focus and clarity of the conversation helps the caller see what’s important in the circumstance.

  • @juneingram669
    @juneingram669 7 років тому +220

    I would be really mad at an ex who left me in loads of debt and got off Scott free

    • @farouknaas2488
      @farouknaas2488 7 років тому +12

      June Ingram ya dont say 😂

    • @juneingram669
      @juneingram669 7 років тому +17

      Emerald Isle TV it happens, I knew a woman who took out a loan in her name for her boyfriend then he cleared off. Suppose people are too trusting

    • @kw9299
      @kw9299 7 років тому +19

      I bet he isn't Scott free, prob why everything was in her name. He's destroyed his credit before he latched onto her. Hope the next one doesn't fall for his game.

    • @twdjt6245
      @twdjt6245 7 років тому +11

      June Ingram love can make some people stupid and blind. I bet you he had her sign up with only her name for the very reason that he knew he could just ditch her one day and not bother with all the money he spent. Either that or he was a deadbeat who nobody would give any credit to in the first place.

    • @somerandomguy2073
      @somerandomguy2073 6 років тому +8

      It's weird seeing this video and reading these comments. The EXACT same thing happened to my mum. Bankrupt boyfriend, bought him a bunch of stuff, refurbished the house, got £12,000 into debt (entirely in her name), decided to leave him and literally ran (in a single morning) across the country to her parents house because of his temper, and then 2 months later he was still living in the refurbished house with everything except the brand new car, and had moved another woman in. If that had happened now, when I'm 20 as opposed to 13, then I would have been over there with a hammer, a really big knife and a can of petrol within 25 seconds. She only got out of debt last year. He ruined her life for years and she's only just got it back.

  • @hollywalker1000
    @hollywalker1000 3 роки тому +1

    I found your page since I was 19 and I am 21 now . I have learned so much and I love this chanel

  • @PalmBeachFlorida24
    @PalmBeachFlorida24 6 місяців тому +3

    I had a partner walk up to me and say I needed to go to an office on Monday to sign for his $500,000 mortgage loan. I was shocked, I asked why and he said oh,no worry it's just a formality. Formality. Really. This is without me owning the instrument (the house) so I'd be left holding the debt for $500,000 if he absconded. I laughed and left.

  • @sarahh2072
    @sarahh2072 6 років тому +3

    Dave was so sweet to her, poor girl, that's a tough lesson but she needed it

  • @bestly802
    @bestly802 7 років тому +199

    "Boyfriend" not husband. It's your debt, he didn't co-sign anything.

    • @kimberlysmall4932
      @kimberlysmall4932 5 років тому +11

      If it were a husband it would be her debt, too.

    • @VivKittie32
      @VivKittie32 5 років тому

      Viet PopLove
      Painful, but that’s the reality of it.

    • @dennisbrooks6892
      @dennisbrooks6892 4 роки тому

      I agree NUFF SAID THANKS

  • @jennym007
    @jennym007 7 років тому +14

    What a great guy Dave is.

    • @igevelynnplus1641
      @igevelynnplus1641 7 років тому +1

      Jenny M
      Yup! And that is supported by statistics.

  • @Ezinma88
    @Ezinma88 5 років тому +6

    Dave was so sweet to her!

  • @horserider422
    @horserider422 7 років тому +25

    Rule number 1 do not get any loans on anything anytime married or dating

  • @oliverchristophergomez4642
    @oliverchristophergomez4642 5 років тому +6

    Dave handled this like a boss. That ex is a piece of work. Hope Natalia got out from under that debt

  • @debchak8107
    @debchak8107 5 років тому +2

    Dave Ramsey you are truly a great person and definitely a great advisor! Thank you for helping people like this!

  • @s1234pro
    @s1234pro 5 років тому +83

    Ladies, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER give money to a man!

    • @ranip7644
      @ranip7644 5 років тому +7

      And don't play house with them either.

    • @Cntr-Cmd-Delete
      @Cntr-Cmd-Delete 5 років тому +14

      never give money to a woman neither

    • @Discipleofthelordandjesus
      @Discipleofthelordandjesus 3 роки тому +5

      Men , never ever, ever , ever let your women stay at home and live off of you.

    • @farmthestars3962
      @farmthestars3962 3 роки тому +4

      MEN Never,Never, Never give money to a woman .

    • @MegaMarVerde
      @MegaMarVerde 3 місяці тому

      @@Discipleofthelordandjesuswho is gonna raise the kids then ? Your mom?

  • @catherineboehm9558
    @catherineboehm9558 6 місяців тому +1

    After 1 time spent with a guy, he had one of his girl buddies call me and asked me to pay at least 1 truck payment for him as it was going to repossession. I didn’t know who she was even. Needless to say, I told them that I needed to take care of myself and just don’t call anymore. I then heard from him and he asked if we could still hang out. What and then he could use my new car. I told him everything was so inappropriate that happened from 1 date. I’m not a bank. Just don’t call any more. Luckily he was a nice guy, just stupid. He left me alone.

  • @sl4983
    @sl4983 5 років тому +22

    Dave, I really am glad when you bring up the importance of marriage, and not "shacking up" and playing house. God bless you for that.

  • @cynicallyyours61
    @cynicallyyours61 7 місяців тому +1

    My hubby had his ex do this to him and she stole his savings, then dumped him. It happens all the time, and he has a adult daughter with her.

  • @somerandomguy2073
    @somerandomguy2073 6 років тому +30

    It's weird seeing this video and reading these comments. The EXACT same thing happened to my mum. Bankrupt boyfriend, bought him a bunch of stuff, refurbished the house, got £12,000 into debt (entirely in her name), decided to leave him and literally ran (in a single morning) across the country to her parents house because of his temper, and then 2 months later he was still living in the refurbished house with everything except the brand new car, and had moved another woman in. If that had happened now, when I'm 20 as opposed to 13, then I would have been over there with a hammer, a really big knife and a can of petrol within 25 seconds. She only got out of debt last year. He ruined her life for years and she's only just got it back.

    • @icereidy6586
      @icereidy6586 6 років тому +3

      Some Random Guy... so horrible

    • @vixxcottage
      @vixxcottage 3 роки тому

      Some Random Guy this happens frequently. Women just don't value themselves anymore. These user men know that woman is vulnerable and uses and abuses her. I have also seen men abused financially as well. Scammers are everywhere!

  • @adoe2305
    @adoe2305 10 місяців тому +1

    How can people be so evil? I couldn't even stomach the idea of being such a terrible idea.

  • @shawnballee6053
    @shawnballee6053 7 років тому +70

    And why are you signing loans or contracts with a BOYFRIEND?

    • @shawnballee6053
      @shawnballee6053 7 років тому +6

      Oh...my bad....she signed, not him. Wow. Learning moment.

    • @jessicasakimae541
      @jessicasakimae541 5 років тому +20

      Why ask someone why they made a stupid decision when they already realized they made a stupid decision? Learn from Dave, don’t kick someone when they are trying to get up.

  • @javaskull88
    @javaskull88 2 роки тому +4

    My father didn’t tell me much about the adult world, but at least he told me never to co-sign on a loan.

  • @Melly16yr10
    @Melly16yr10 Рік тому +4

    You never take out loans with Boyfriends/Girlfriends

  • @BlueBoxGirl1837
    @BlueBoxGirl1837 3 роки тому

    Dave gives great advice but this one here was truly amazing! I love how gentle yet direct he was. I know he gave her hope where she may have thought there was not!
    I would love to hear an update on this caller

  • @PUGGDAD
    @PUGGDAD 5 років тому +27

    My ex girlfriend and I were together 12 years, never married thank god. We had separate bank accounts, separate credit cards, separate auto loans. Keep it that way...

    • @darthchoco4022
      @darthchoco4022 5 років тому +8

      PUGGDAD why did you never get married after 12 years?

    • @jayrider2726
      @jayrider2726 4 роки тому +1

      Very true

    • @sup_monica3597
      @sup_monica3597 4 роки тому +6

      If u never married me after 12 years you would be my ex too.

    • @PUGGDAD
      @PUGGDAD 4 роки тому +2

      sup_ monica - Best decision of my life was not to marry her. We should of broken up years before. Plus women file for 80% of divorces anyway when you are married. Split was easy. No lawyers, no asset splitting, no alimony, no child support, no having the state and courts in our business. Easy peazy for us both.

    • @joygarrett8397
      @joygarrett8397 7 місяців тому

      @ puggdad . . . That reason . . . If true . . . Is they finally walk away after years of trying to work things out & realize the guy ain’t gonna change . . Many guys believe if they attended 1 counseling session they’ve “done their part” lol . . .

  • @samanthasmiles9112
    @samanthasmiles9112 9 місяців тому +2

    NO ONE should be asking you to cosign a loan. The bank LOVES to make money off of you. The reason they deny ANYONE is because they are NOT safe to loan money to. The bank has deduced that this person has a high chance of NOT PAYING THEIR LOAN. Do not cosign unless you are fully prepared to take on the loan yourself. That loan is 100% hers because her credit is the only thing at risk. Hopefully, she will learn and never do this again.

    • @roadrunner9622
      @roadrunner9622 9 місяців тому

      Exactly. If the bank won't trust them, there's a reason. Why should *I* take on that risk?

  • @myoldfarmhouse4316
    @myoldfarmhouse4316 5 років тому +4

    l had a car repoed. I only owed $2,800 and they still dinged me for over $3000 after Auction!!! l will never be in debt for anything again!!!

  • @IndigoStarrAz
    @IndigoStarrAz 10 місяців тому +1

    I get the vibe she's actually going to follow through and its going to be good for her moving forward.

  • @tammiesspark
    @tammiesspark 4 роки тому +3

    I like how nice he spoke to her

  • @kiakai
    @kiakai 5 років тому +2

    why is it that people call without aaaaallll their information so they can get the proper help??? it drives me insane to hear people calling to talk about their debt and they have no idea how much they owe!!!

  • @frankish5314
    @frankish5314 5 років тому +11

    Never co sign a loan for anybody!

  • @islandgirl5382
    @islandgirl5382 5 років тому

    All I can do is shake my head... Bless her heart! I have noticed that no bad a situation is with the callers, he never makes the person feel worse!! Just positive feedback!!

  • @debramurphy4295
    @debramurphy4295 7 років тому +51

    This is why you do not. Take a loan out with someone till you are married

    • @christendenise220
      @christendenise220 6 років тому +6

      Debra Murphy It still goes down hill too, even if married..

    • @kimberlysmall4932
      @kimberlysmall4932 5 років тому

      If you're married his debt is her debt. Not being married is a saving grace (ie debt is not combined)

    • @live_unafraid47
      @live_unafraid47 5 років тому +1

      Or better yet...Don't take out a loan in the first place. No debt at all

  • @anthonyhawkins4136
    @anthonyhawkins4136 4 роки тому +1

    Give me chills with how generous Dave is.