The Simple Explanation for Self-Love Deficit Disorder. Codependency Reformulated.
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- Опубліковано 28 сер 2024
- In this video, Rosenberg reduces his practical and theoretical explanations for his "Codependency Cure™” work, which is the follow up to his Human Magnet Syndrome books.
This is a mold-breaking information that represents the most modern thinking about codependency. "Codependency,” is re-defined and re-conceptualized into “Self-Love Deficit Disorder (SLDD)™," which is a trauma, core shame, pathological loneliness, and addiction disorder.
“Self-Love Deficit Disorder (SLDD™)” is the crucial reformulation of the term “codependency.” It strips the antiquated and often misused word of its shaming connotations while providing a realistic description of the problem. As most people with SLDD will confirm, they would never be in harmful relationships with pathological narcissists if they had a stable sense of self-love.
The full-length video seminar (5.5 hours) is available here:
www.selflovere.... Note, this material is not yet available in book form.
Ross Rosenberg M.Ed., LCPC, CADC latest book, The Human Magnet Syndrome: The Codependent Narcissist Trap (2018) and his personal development, seminars, workshops, and other services can be found at his Self-Love Recovery Institute company, www.selflovere...
Ross is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness, and author and is known globally for his expertise in codependency (Self-Love Deficit Disorder™), Pathological Narcissism, Narcissistic Abuse and Trauma Treatment.
His book, “The Human Magnet Syndrome” sold over 120,000 copies and is translated into ten languages. Ross’s UA-cam channel has amassed over 19 million video views and more than 200K subscribers. He is a keynote speaker and educator who has presented educational workshops in 30 States/70 cities and abroad. Ross has been regularly featured on national TV and radio.
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I would add that the codependent/narcissist relationships don't only pertain to romantic relationships. You can do this with friends/family/work life etc. Great illustration.
I just felt that maybe I felt that because mine wasn't romantic.
Mine was being born to a Narcissistic mother & having no chance of a fast getaway from her. ....& I didn't marry a narcissist either. Does that mean may not have 'self luv deficit disorder'?
@@buddhacook1087 I believe you are right because mine was my father and uncle and these people I knew since i was young and healthy. I think self love is a life long process that some people might get in low times in their lives where they settle for the narcissist. Because if they were healthy they would not accept their abuse. That’s why the divorce happens naturally.
@@n0426 thanku for ur kind response🙂🙏
@@buddhacook1087 p
So here I am at the age of 36 wondering why it always goes wrong. Girlfriends told me I was controlling, a military doctor said I didn't like myself, and I'd tried SSRIs for depression. I'd pieced together my childhood memories and used Ayahuasca to explore my unconscious. I knew I was never loved and always felt different, I never knew what I felt had a name. Self love deficit disorder is much more helpful than codependency "disease". Thank you.
I have seen testimonials of Ayahuasca helping people find self love and acceptance . Did you have this experience ?
Ur lucky, imagine how I'm feeing at 62.....🙄now I find the damn light switch.
Yeah, you pretty much sum it up perfectly. I had a horrible codependency problem. The anxiety would be so bad that I would physically feel pain in my chest when I felt separation. I couldn’t bare being on my own, even though I didn’t really enjoy other people’s company either, I liked being alone as a teen, I enjoyed my own company but once the codependency started kicking in I couldn’t bare silence and loneliness. I had addictions because I couldn’t deal with any of my emotions nor trauma. I craved love and company because I never had it plus I was terrified of being with myself. I neglected and abandoned myself for years, I was terrified of myself, or my emotions, my trauma, my thoughts, my feeling of loneliness, separation anxiety, didn’t feel good enough to be with myself. Plus your self identity is both terribly damaged and absolutely dependent on others view of you, you don’t know who you are without seeing yourself through others’ eyes because that’s what the narcissist taught you, and your only way of survival to the narcissist’s abuse and manipulation. You literally as a person don’t exist, don’t matter, and your self image comes from others. They always taught you your needs didn’t matter nor even exist, so you always ignore them to fulfill others. Your boundaries were non existent and your right to voice your discomfort was tagged as “crazy” because “no abuse existed” (gaslighted) that basically you just have no right to say no to anyone. It’s a horrible thing... because you realize that you forgot you were a person too at some point...
Dependent on others’ view of you, feeling responsible for other people’s lives, and terrified of going back to yourself with also the fact that you forgot how to do that and who you are is a terrible combination that destroys your life. I’m getting out of it, stay strong people, there is a way out. A way back to yourself, that self that you might not understand how to love and might think is unlovable but that’s not true, once you remember oh Lord you will remember what true love is 💖 And will even wonder how couldn’t you love such beautiful person that you are 🤍 I’m rooting for all of us
How did you begin healing this?
It's so unfortunate that disordered people attract other disordered people. I think that's why it's often so critical to heal/grow while you're single. The dynamic is just too confusing and complex when both people have to consistently be on board.
Agreed my healing came on my own with God
@@dr.vonslifeinvesting6485 and i left my husband and noticed, i do not need a man to be complete, actually i am doing much better on my own. God first. Of course with this comes the Christian "guilt" if this is ok. Bec, you promised for good and for worse
Can't agree more !!
Hurt people hurt people. Sad but true.
I believe the universal alignment brings these two people together to illuminate in their own lives what needs to truly be healed. Sadly, most do not open themselves up to seeing the patterns and trauma that caused them to take on the character of codependent or a narcissist.
Mr. Rosenberg, this is a terrific video. I just turned 50 and two years ago I decided to go no contact with my narcissistic father and my two enabling brothers (one is the Golden Child/narcissist himself, and the other is the Lost Child), "resigning" from my decades-long position as the Scapegoat. After decades of being dismissed and invalidated, I ended up in a psych hospital for ten days, a period during which neither of my brothers so much as picked up a phone. The aforementioned never followed up/checked in on me re: my recovery, but since that hospital stay they have certainly exploited my struggles to show outside parties "See, he's a very troubled person. He's mentally ill." Well, I *am* mentally ill; I struggle with what you call SLDD. The irony in my accusers' allegation is that they are comfortable in their ignorance and devoid of any accountability whatsoever where their role in my mental and emotional challenges are concerned. It's been extremely depressing to come to the realization that your own family is *not* a source of alliance and support in this life. Thank you for disseminating information and providing education on this topic. I value the work you do, very much.
Peter, very well said. It's sad that the people/family/spouse one should be able to trust and lean on when needed, are the very ones that have spent their time with you mocking and denigrating you. Have courage dear heart in knowing that you are not alone. You grew up in a crazy making family. Peace from a fellow scapegoat.
Thank you, Sue. I appreciate that. I participate in a Meetup group and have met some wonderful people. The group has provided more insight and help with growth than any therapist ever has. I appreciate your message. You hang in there yourself!
Peter D. Hope your doing better❤️
Dear, plus stay strong. Love can be given only by persons who have love in their heart. This is nothing to do with the "structure". It takes so long to finally understand it. Plus give all yr love to yrself.
Oh, dear one. I hear u so loudly. My family are just strange people I unfortunately know. They mean *nothing* to me now. I'm trying to find appropriate housing so I can escape from my parents house and lives, but I'm currently financially dependant on them. Freedom is coming, I feel it, b/c I finally know what the hell is going on. How lucky we are to know what we're dealing with. Best of luck 🙏 Oh, and the crazy making, yeah, that's a great trick, isn't it - not!! Oh, how we suffer in the most awful ways 😵
I am so happy to find this video. It's insane that I am just NOW learning that there is a disorder/feeling/WORD for what I have felt was something wrong with me for so many years and so many relationships like this and didn't fully understand what exactly it was:( Reading these comments too makes me feel less alone. Grateful to say the least
🙂hey me too, I now have a label & description of what I have. It's like someone turned on the lights & I was seeing for the very first time.
I believe that people can have this for other reasons besides being raised by a narcissist. Possibly just parents that had a deficit core, but were also good parents. Very interesting research! ✨✨✨✨✨
Agreed. Could be parents who are also codependents themselves and put others first before their children at times to ‘keep the peace’ or make them happy. Wish that was cleared up.
@@gobonimo6140 exactly
@@gobonimo6140 I'm not sure who is more harmful to the child, the co-dependent or the narcissist (or sociopath or psychopath)... I'm sure it differs for everyone. I resented what I considered the co-dependent more than the narcissist because the narc was a molester and the co-dependent ignored my clear pleas for help. It was obvious the narc was sick, but what of the co-dependent's behaviour? Does this make sense? It seems harder to reason them out.
Self love is a life long project. ❤️🔥
I percieved my spouce as the Narcissist my mother was, but he isn't a narcissist, I was.... I was both the codependent and the Narcissist... I had no self love... It's getting better. Thank you for this video that helped frame that I'm on the right path to heal my childhood trauma.
This is me. It’s gotten to the point where I am throwing up and not eating due to the panic of my partner not responding within a few hours or if he’s playing games w/ friends instead of being with me (we live together).
I’m underweight and know I don’t have long left if I don’t get this under control. One step at a time…
I am sending you best wishes. I hope you can find peace of mind
Wow I finally get it. thank you for making it simple!
In 6 minutes this video describes my entire desperate life...and the hope for change and a healthy future...thank you.
Thanks for watching. Glad this helps.
This is a great and very clear video, Thank you so much.
Finally after 62 years, bringing all pieces of the jigsaw together. A current experience with a Narcissist neighbour has triggered root cause trauma.
She is violent, ex-military, controlling, extremely manipulative and has enablers, flying monkeys in the neighbourhood and in authority. She has also sprayed toxic substances into my garden and carved bamboo spikes to impale my cat, verified by the police.
Currently, she is causing a rat infestation in my loft from excessive bird feeding rendering pest control ineffective. Unfortunately, I had already moved, when I had a dream about being held down and fed intravenous poison and another that there was a tiger on her garden shed watching and waiting to pounce. Hence so pleased to have found your CRUCIAL work on dreams within the healing process.My dreams act as helper and guide and now like an artist friend, I act upon them.I believe they hold and await the solution to current crisis.
My Mother was co-dependent to a alcoholic husband, also her Father and my brother.
I have only just discovered I have SLDD as a result, programmed to be responsible, meet others needs, not recognise my own, now having to be aware of, set boundaries etc. especially in a hostile environment.
Denial/repression was easier .
I am exhausted, taking AD'S and have VIT D deficiency. I want to be asleep all the time, perhaps to process all this as part of the healing journey? but it means I can barely function on a daily basis, yet alone move. Consequently, as no contact is not an option, I am minimising exposure, but just the thought of her, yet alone sight or presence makes me feel revolted and physically sick.
The body also speaks and trauma is also held at the cellular level in me, it's the gut. I intend to move on to the 10 step treatment program, when time, energy permits, to focus on the solution rather than just the problem.
However, in my experience this is not a linear process, i.e. one can experience several aspects of the 10 step program simultaneously. I am also being made aware of the spiritual healing dimension in the recovery process, from separation to integration. Some believe that there is a pure essence within that cannot be polluted or violated, if we can reconnect to that, find and shine the light even in the direst and darkest of circumstances.
It is good to know I am not alone on the journey and I hope this helps others in some way.
Valued thanks,
What a life
@@carolinewatt1351 I know and it gets worse when lies and false accusations are thrown in as well. Someone has given me a book about a holocaust survivor, called. '"The choice" hope can flower even in hell. Yet to read. So much drama suffering in this life. Surely, it is not as many would claim meant to be like this.
I look forward to some peace and joy.
@@sumina8653 thank you
Let's make it really simple. Codependence is a messy term. It's just..Dependence.
Lack of love in childhood means you develop attachment disorder, in turn you don't develop Independence. Thanks
Therefore you are attracted to people who can't love you ( until you learn to love yourself).
Well if they can't love you, it means they can't love themselves either. Only someone who does not love himself is going to get with someone who also does not.
PS. Be kind & forgiving to our selves & our shortcomings. Nobody is perfect 🦋🙂
Very well explained. As a survivor of this condition I can relate with the pain of living without self love. I feel so grateful for my recovery from this condition..
How did you recover?
How??
Yea please share for us all
Such a helpful visual illustration. At 5:08 I can look at the triangle and say, for 32 years I lived in the left side and for the past 2 years I have been living and trying daily to live in the right side of this triangle. Its a daily lifestyle like excercising muscles at the gym. Never stop the work you are doing Ross Rosenberg I am eternally grateful for it.
Amazing to finally have answers to why I am the way I am. Thank you for giving me a way to solve my hurt.
I have this and I think your analysis is bang-on right. I was raised by a narcissistic mother and sociopathic father. Most people gravitate naturally to the familiar, esp. childhood role models like parents. I am empathetic and a magnet to sociopaths and narcissists. So this theory is key for me to learn and get better.
The only thing I would add is that uncertainty drives core shame and there is a viscous circle that goes on in that section of it, which acts as a motivator to continue to be trapped in core shame, even when you have core self love. I have been acutely aware of this since I was a child. It is this evil doubting of ourselves that stops us from moving up on the hierarchy to the next level. Personally, I find that even when we have mastered the next level, this is the area that needs the most amount of work, because with self doubt, it triggers all those developmental stage habits that kept and keep us SLDD in the first place and we fall right back to the core shame section (mainly because childhood reference points are hardwired into the brain and the easiest to revert to, unknowingly in many cases). I work on this daily. I hope these personal observations help your theory, as that is my goal in this. You have a wonderful channel here and I am going to buy your book as well. God bless.
I think the narcissist has the same problem, but instead of becoming addict to love in hopes to be loved , the narcissist becomes addicted to the suppy they get from the codependent !
You are right! If you are interested in more information about that, you can listen to this webinar: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/video-seminars-downloads/products/full-webinar-the-origins-of-codependency-and-pathological-narcissism
Yeah
I think it’s kinda the same thing. That “supply” is what they recognize as Love. So it’s kinda the same I think… except for the narcissist recognizes supply which is essentially external “validation” and energy, as lobe. I think bc they’ve developed such a strong protection/self-serving mechanism, it’s only ever self-serving, along with the other deep defense mechanisms that combat their deeply ingrained self-esteem issues and self-hate and unworthiness beliefs. It’s changed their wiring to view “supply” as love. Sad actually bc what- u kinda just HOPE that’s not you or how ur brain and defense mechanisms decide to react and interpret. But essentially I think it’s the same thing. Both addicted and longing and looking for love. Except narcissists have a different incorrect view and experience of “love”. (Which really is the worst case scenario possible. How tragic, and unfortunate. A curse that would be truly. Everywhere seems to hate them but when I think ab it, it’s empathy. They have the most horrendous cases. They have the worst I believe)
😊
Dr. you are extremely knowledgeable on the subject. Thank you for all the informative research and free online content.
I believe, as a psychology and energy healing student, as well as a very emphatic and intuitive person, that if people can damage people, people also have the power to HEAL people.
Healing is not possible alone. Good people such as friends, therapists or other healers offer an immeasurable transformative presence to our lives. Recovery does not need to be so painful or complicated. It is one day and one step at the time along with lots of patience, lightness of heart and mind, and loving determination. A simple daily meditation practice is essential to let out the garbage of our ruminating minds, as well as energetic distancing techniques for the overly sensitive ones like me.
Have a wonderful day. Thank you. 🙏🌸
Just sobbing and sobbing.
I’ve spent 18 months integrating an Ayahuasca experience that brought all this up.
Only this video perfectly describes the turmoil. The shame and loneliness and terror.
This video really resonated with me. Its gonna me take a while to build up that self love pyramid but I'm gonna work on it brick by painful brick. Thank you so much for such a concise and informative video!
I am Fighting through the root Cause of my Battle Which is my Parents. They didn't Know any Better They did the Best they Could they weren't bad People the were SICK. I Was with Them Both before they Past Away and I am So Glad I Could do That. Women have a Tremendous Strength I know I Get It From God. Thanks Ross. 🌈🏴😍🙏🙏😀
Best, most well spent 6 minutes of my week! Thank you, Ross for a concise visual roadmap of the cure for codependency.
Could SLDD be a result of Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN)? Having parents who were fundamentally good and care taking but emotionally unavailable to the extent that child needed
I would like to offer my opinion. I think yes, because it mirrors very much what I recall from my past.
Overbearing and loving mother who used the words "you are good as you are". And occational loving father who could also be judgemental when I wasnt living up to ideals. And otherwise emotional unavailable. My mother could also be emotional unavailable because my father was busy with his own stuff and therefore she was working and taking care of the home. Which lead to not having enough energy for me....
The problem is that children are often abused in a narcist-SLDD "s relationship.
The result is children with life long traumas... And when we grow up we don't know what is wrong with us, we think that people should behave this way ... until we realize how badly our parents behaved... It is like climbing (growing ) out of a well! But you can newer forget that well... PTSD remains. This is why we have all these mental issues... I think narcissism is an unconscious choice! While SLDD is a result of a narcist parent or parents. I had to fight both PTSD, SLDD, and covert narcissism in my mental development!
Now I'm only "addicted" to weed... :D Take care people!
This has come onto my feed again exactly because I need it again right now..thankyou
Real time tools to heal. Thank you very much Ross!! This makes it all very clear!
After watching a few of these videos I figured out what you are really saying is that some of us are not loved. Just say it that way. Don't use a made-up word for it. My mother didn't love me, my father didn't love me, my husband didn't love me. Got it. I am alone now because I am not loved. Got it.
This is the most important video a SLD person could watch. I get it now. I get it.
I think narcissists are more often the ones with a self-love deficit.
Yes, this is true. But their self-love deficiency is a gaping wound that cannot ever be healed
@BB80Delta +1
There is hope I think even for narcissists, if we look to Sam Vaknin's work and cold therapy.
Narcissists are sufferers of severe C-PTSD and are completely immersed in a shell of protection. They are definitely suffering from severe, unforgiving SLDD. They are in fact suffering from a self almost completely, but the child is in there somewhere.
@@RossRosenberg Don't you think being codependent and narcissistic is not as sharply separable? There is always duality in a person. I read in some places about the egocentrism of the neurotics. It is a duality in this too, isn't it?
It is retrospective, but when I was a child and was thinking about schizophrenia, I always imagined it as the person having a "good" (vulnerable) and a "bad" (powerful) part of his personality, one is the projection of the not integrated parts. This is a duality too in the person.
I don't think there is somewhere the narcissists who have a gaping wound which can not be ever healed... I think it is always the decision of the person... not determined by the wound. (?)
They have no self to love or not live.
Ross Rosenberg
well that’s comforting
Yep!
This is correct, it checks out with my own experience and what I learned about Complex Trauma in past year.
This is also connected to Social anxiety, I am amazed how much trauma is separated from avoidance issues in media, official resources and mentors.
I am crying! Thank you!
This explains SO much. I tend to feel more lonely when I'm in a relationship. The fear of losing myself is real. 😢
I'm So grateful for my trauma therapist. 💗🙏🏻
After 50 years, I finally feel like I'm figuring out why I am the way I am & learning to cope, heal & love parts of myself I was scared to even look at, let alone love.
Thank you for this.❤
i’m so glad i finally found a word to describe what’s wrong with me, my boyfriend said something last night that made me feel so alone in this issue i’m having and i want to just stop being like this so bad
Glad this is helpful. Thanks for sharing.
That's an explanation of my whole life lol I do now see in my 30's that I have had too many toxic relationships.
Beautifully explained thank you 🙏 🦋
Self acceptance. I prefer to say loving God because i believe we are Love essentially & we are a piece of God. We are Love 💖
Thx to the person that is reading !!!!!! and to Ross YOU BOTH ARE AMAZING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yep, on the road to recovery. Thank you.
Wow-I have searched endlessly for videos that concisely encompass all aspects of this. This is great-will pass it along to my loved ones and friends. Thank you so much!
Wow! Thanks for shinning a light at my core. Time to work my way up
I don't know if I'm brave enough to face my core shame and the core trauma
Am so blessed am watching and am 26 years old 🙏
Self Love Deficit Disorder is the perfect way to rename it.
Thanks for the clear, straightforward video. SUPER helpful to so many! I'll be sharing this with my loved ones so they can understand better.
Thank you for your support. If you want to watch the complete seminar, you can find it here: www.selfloverecovery.com/collections/video-seminars-downloads/products/the-codependency-cure
This is explained so well!!! Why is that no one else in the mental health fields grasps this concept?!?
Thanks for watching! 🙏
Wonderful clarity. Thank you big time!!
Thank you! Finally we are getting to the root cause
Sincerly thank you for your videos. I left an 8 year relationship with 2 sons because my ex was a narc. But your videos have helped me realise my sldd and co dependency too her and how I'm really not helping my sons too not follow down this same long dark road but now I can say I'm understanding what needs to be done and I appreciate sincerely all your advice. #mensuffertoo.
Almost all DSM diagnoses are treated with the presenting problems, and most core issues aren't addressed either. Traditional psychotherapy needs to diagnose most individuals with adjustment disorder, rather than labeling them deficit, dysfunctional, or broken....when instead they experienced dysfunctional traumas that broke or injured their healthy, developing spirits. Nothing's inherently wrong with most of us (barring biological or physiological inherited psychological conditions), many traumas/wrongs were done to us or experienced by us.
That's not the only reason this happens. It happens when your oldest sibling is killed in a car wreck when you are under 5 years old and the melt down of the family does long lasting damage. Forcing yourself to over-achieve to make up for your lack of self-love and forcing yourself to become introverted mitigates the problem. You may never love yourelf, but you will at least respect yourself. You will always be a narccist magnet. Just know that. And there is no shortage of them these days... Likely due to the high divorce rate and broken homes. Besides, romantic love is just a chemical reaction. Real love is spiritual and can only be found there. Courage!!!
What really pisses me off as some people tell me just be by yourself for a while you don't need to be with anybody that's like telling a alcoholic just stop drinking stop going to the liquor store
I remember my parents using ridicule as a way to control. 🙏🙏🏾🙏
This simplifies it so well.
this is true, this actually works. It worked with me and I didn't even realise I had been taking the steps in the pyramid.
Although I like the term Self love deficit disorder, I am concerned as a therapist specializing in narcissist abuse that Ross Rosenberg’s material implies that anyone involved with a narcissist is a “co-dependent (described as a “fixer”). I would encourage one to look at Sandra L. Browns work and others on this relationship dynamic in which has research support and is less subjective shaming.
Yeah they are he’s right about the narcs shame
I see my attachment trauma since my mother was too young to take care of me and wanted to give me to a children's home when I was a baby. Then her parents, my grand-parents, decided to raise me.
I love this explanation, so clear, it actually has helped me take steps to real change... I have watched a few times and shared with others in similar circumstances. But it takes to empty the old view of oneself and truly accept this reality . Unless we take responsibility for our selves we then can benefit from such information.. I wish it was in Spanish to further share it with others....
Thank you so much for your support! This video it is in Spanish: ua-cam.com/video/z2-qn6u3h64/v-deo.html. Cheers!
This really simplified things before i start diving deeper, thank you
Ah lets face it we are f- -ked up
Thank you, life saving information
Thank you for helping me understand
This is such a great video, thankyou
Very enlightening, thank you
Makes sense! Thank you!!
So well done. Brilliant. Thank you.
Thank you
Welcome!
This is great! I comprehend. 👍
If you fall off riding a horse the first time, get back on the saddle soonest to rid of that fear before it takes a tenacious hold onto you.
GREAT video - thank you
Thank you Thank you Thank you
Thank you. Your videos are very educational. I have learned so much.
I just had my in laws live with me and my husband for 2 years, and my MIL is the Narc who wanted to take over my home and my crown. When she realised I had figured her out and disengaged and moved on with my life, they staged a spat and thus called the sister (Narc) to collect them. After realising they wanted to infiltrate our EVERY weekend picking and choosing belonging to collect, I made a stand and told them it was all going into storage on their side of town, Husband has been right by my side and has now been accused of being in turmoil and aggressive, but that's what it took after much kicking and screaming but I now have a list from them, and now I just hitched up the trailer and reversed it into my curved driveway all by myself! So I am learning so much and taking care of business, now that we have forbid them to enter our home. At 46 years old, and looking back on all my friends and boyfriends and how narc they were to me, I have been coached for the last 2 years to achieve my business dream that was born in 2008, and I'm never looking back.
Best video explanation EVER!!!!
This makes so much sense! I would love a similar video but for the child 🙂
very powerful! Well explained! Thank you!
You're so welcome! Glad you liked it!
Omg! But we love the hardest..it’s just about finding the right one
I finally got the book The Human Magnet Syndrone. Thanks
Thank you for the support! Hope you like the book.
Instead of blaming many who are being gas light by calling them as having a self-love deficit disorder how about instead shining all of the examination lights onto the top of the triangle instead concerning those at the top of the food chain who often have real self-centeredness and real selfishness instead?
There is no more videos about this. This is the only one. So guys you don't understand hoe valuable is this.
Thanks ❤
Good stuff.
Well explained!
Excellent video! I like it breaks it down! I think you had the best phenomenal idea of breaking things down using lil cartoons!
This is awesome 👏
Thank You Sir.. It was a good content and talk
You are most welcome
You need a better thumbnail design.. i thought it was a boring presentation..then i watched for the content.. boy i was wrong..cool content design that deserve more views.. and i like your narration!
👏👏👏
Thank you! 🌹
You are so welcome!
What an amazing video: content, narration and production! A hat trick. Nice job. I've read your book and Pete Walker's books. Recently, I started reading Dr. Arthur Janov's book "The Primal Revolution", which is blowing my mind. I see a lot of similarities between "The Human Magnet Syndrome"/SLDD and Primal Therapy. Is the connection intentional?
Also, how does one distinguish between Asperger's and CPTSD from childhood trauma?
This is only helpful is one understands what a "narcissist" is and applies it to the other person. Second, saying that it starts with "being raised" by someone who is transactional, judgmental etc, often leads to putting the blame on a single custodial parent. It does not address the absent parent who may or may not have been judgmental or transactional. THat person may have done something different but not unrelated to a child feeling unworthy such as, for example, an absent parent who regularly makes promises of visiting, but calls to make excuses and doesn´t show up . . . or maybe does but only after the child has waited hours and hours, even a day, for that parent to show up (partial reinforcement - causing a kind of desperation in the child to have that parent ágain´because, if nothing else, everyone on tv has one, the other kids in school have one etc but also, if and when this parent shows up, there are likely even more promises made . . . íf I lived here, I would buy that house (nearby) so we could visit every day . . . I am going to be at your next performance . . . If I had custody of you . . . . fill in the blanks). Third, I feel this is a dangerous video because it causes viewers to diagnose themselves as well as diagnosing others, which is simply a bad idea.
Lastly, this video seems judgmental in itself.
Calling people who need help "addicts"? Wow - that is a loaded word. Happily, the video does not describe me but co-dependency, without all the labels in this video, does seem to described how I was in one relationship long ago, and also someone else close to me. I just happened on this one (thanks UA-cam for directing me here, there any everywhere :) )
Anyway, does Rosenberg have some good ideas to help lift people out of the conditions that have, along with factors he doesn´t address, lead them to the point of co-dependency? Not here he doesn´t.
When tackling the root cause of trauma, what if the adult can’t remember the attachment trauma because it happened in utero or before 2 years old? How can they bring this up to examine the root cause a deal with this type of trauma? This is fascinating and insightful btw! Thank you so much!
Now i know whats wrong with me... I hope i can get better
I hope this works
WTF?? I mean wow! Eye opener. Thank you so much!!
Excellent
Once the child is in trust with life , none of any illusions will lead him .
Empty space not filled up emptied out.can see it as an addiction both sides.thanks.
Thank you for putting into words what I could not do. I love you with abundance! ;-)
Love it 💗 this is priceless information for the sldd. Cant wait for the new book to come out.
So Ross treats one person at the expense of another. Why not treat them both that way they can stay together and Avoid divorce and destruction.
Yall should read the book Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay. It's what my therapist gave me.
Saved my life. I was like this. Psychotherapy DOES help.