Women treat MEN the way men treat JOBS: how relationship goals change the dating process
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- Опубліковано 3 лип 2024
- This has been my single most important realization with respect to dating and relationships, as it helped me understand much about the process that would otherwise have remained painful and incomprehensible. Women treat men the way men treat jobs. Women enter into relationships with men who they believe can offer them the best opportunity to further their goals, all other things being equal, and they will lateral to another relationship if another man can entice them with a more compelling offer. I expand on the analogy throughout the episode.
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Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.
Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com
#dating #relationship #relationshipgoals
Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated program and the world's only empirically-validated GRE test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com.
This has been my single most important realization with respect to dating and relationships, as it helped me understand much about the process that would otherwise have remained painful and incomprehensible. Women treat men the way men treat jobs. Women enter into relationships with men who they believe can offer them the best opportunity to further their goals, all other things being equal, and they will lateral to another relationship if another man can entice them with a more compelling offer. I expand on the analogy throughout the episode.
Orion is a licensed psychologist in the state of California.
Podcast available of Spotify, Instagram, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and others.
See the "About" tab for more information on donations and consultations.
Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com
#dating #relationship #relationshipgoals
can u give some examples and explanations of "relationship goals" in an update video?
This is advice for people that are into flimsy relationships. Not for religious people that have higher level values
@@paulhart7739 Yes, and I also get the sense that you are talking about a marriage relationship, whereas the UL'r is talking about something more casual (maybe how you would say "flimsy").
This can apply, I think, in the earlier stages of relating for those of us who are religious. For example - and to the extent it helps give an example to @tomkarate1 - as a single woman, I consider the friends I have at church. Those friends who are married, I know there are limits on what our relationship goals can be - I'm not a homewrecker! Amongst single friends, I want to share Christian fellowship and grow in Christ with them on our shared spiritual journey, and at the same time, I also want to take note of which of them seem to be walking a similar path. Identifying who those people are and aren't is a *relationship goal,* because that way I am not preoccupying myself with someone I may find attractive, but with whom I know there is little chance of building a future ("the spirit is willing... " as the scriptures tell us).
this is psychopathic
This is true. Again, I have seen too many girlfriends and wives of other men trying to defect to me. I was mostly uninterested or was afraid of being saddled with an obligation. Maybe I was unsure about their loyalty and my ability to keep them around.
In any case, I remained unmarried and only dabbled in short terms and ONS largely because what I have seen in this business mind in other men’s (my friends’, strangers’, colleagues’) wives and girlfriends. Some even openly suggested that I poach them, in not so subtle way. I am very good looking by both Asian and Western standards, with an Ivy League pedigree. I get hit on by both Asian and white women and girls, across all ages. So I have a unique vantage point. But i am never sure what they want from me, because my ONS record is so so. I think they view me as a good long term. But I don’t trust them due to my experience with other men’s women.
Then I read HL Mencken’s In Defense of Women. It solidified my belief that marriage was largely fool’s game. The only way to marry is when one is very, very rich.
What do you think?
If a man is a means to the woman’s end, what does a man get out of the marriage? She’s a depreciating asset. I think Mencken is right. Most men are sentimental buffoons.
What I'm hearing is there is no reason to be loyal to your woman because if someone better comes along, she has no problem dumping you.
she has incentives to do so, if she actually follows trough it depends on her individually
Men want loyalty from a woman, and therefore men project this on to women, which makes men think women want loyalty too. Which of course is wrong. Men only see their own projction, he sees his own reflection thinking this reflection is her. Women would rather share a highly sought after man with other women, then staying loyal to a "lower value man" simply because he is loyal to her. She dont value his loyalty much at all.
It’s so hopeless. That’s what I get from the red pill/ manosphere/ men-explaining-women side of UA-cam, but the other way. That women are disposable if they are not good enough. It seems so shallow, and NOT the way I wanna be treated or treat men. This can’t be healthy
@@streeda6501 It is hopeless. When society removed the negative stigma of being divorced, it gave both sides a free pass to easily end the marriage and move on. Of course, women don't pay their exes to end the marriage, they get paid by their exes to end the marriage. Men are figuring out that marriage is too risky. It's not that women are disposable, they're dangerous.
@@joeldespain3597 I think people put too little depth in the marriage vows when they make them (although I’m not married so I don’t know how hard marriage is) It’s sad. How common are prenups? Although I think if the woman spent years away from work because of children, she should be entitled to half of what they saved. I dunno divorces are messy and I know little about them
Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically.
unless its chad, then women love idealistically, but chad loves opportunistically and having the script flipped absolutely destroys women
Thanks rollo lol 👍
@@wcatcher5622
Very true. Women will treat men as disposable till they get treated the same way, and suddenly they act the victim.
Sad but true
That is why it is good to be female, or better yet Chad.
One of the bitterest experiences in my life was talking with my widowed mother when she was living alone, asking her if she thought about my Dad. She said, yeah, he provided for her, gave her some children...exactly like he was an insurance policy, or a job. I was expecting her to say how she loved and missed him. Didn't seem to occur to her.
I think ur dad would say the opposite, the he misses her, etc pretty much the opposite of what she said.
We need more studies done on this shit bro, this video is as bad the ones u see redpill/black pill channels make
I've been to a lot of funerals in the past ten years of older church friends. When the man died, I was struck by how the only things they thought worthy of note or praise were HOW HE SACRIFICED FOR EVERYONE ELSE.
There are likewise some women who sacrifice nearly all of who they are for their families. I just found it striking the consistent emphasis on how a man's worth was defined solely as what value he provided to others, including service in the military where many of them risked death or severe injury.
@@jdraven0890 that's pretty interesting. Maybe it's partly because this is about the only aspect of masculinity that people feel comfortable praising.
There are some definite gender differences but I think the motivation to support others is equal in men and women and they express it in different ways. If a man has a family, that will be the main focus of his support and caring, but typically they support others too. If a man is single, he will still often be motivated to serve others though in a less direct way. These men still care about the community.
Even with the men who are the most rough or on the fringes of society, you will find that they are highly motivated to protect, sometimes even more than people in regular society. Consider soldiers: they will engage in violence towards enemies but are often highly motivated to protect the weak or innocent. Consider men in gangs: try a google search with a gang name and helps behind it, like "hell's angels help" and you'll find story after story of them protecting children or the vulnerable. Same with inmates, just think of the treatment a child predator gets.
I'm not saying that these "rough" men who have violent vocations are all heroes or angels. But I am saying that men in all spheres of life tend to derive a lot of meaning and purpose from protecting and serving.
Women have this drive too, obviously. But I would argue that the trends among modern women make them much more narcissistic, self-absorbed and hyper-focused on luxury and consumerism. It will be interesting to see what funerals are like 50 years from now when a lot more of this forever-single women pass away. Especially if many of these women have this lifestyle into old age.
@@jdraven0890 It’s like what Chris rock said men are only loved cuz they provide…. That they are not complex is well. I think society and even men have put women on his high pedestal over the decades. Now we are suffering behcause of that, channels like the ones we’re commenting on aren’t gonna help us grow too it’ll make us hate women…..
I think you should be very slow to judge how the widowed speak of the departed- you tried to kill her feelings to satisfy your own expectations. It’s not surprising 6o me that it had a poor outcome. No offence intended. My mother is a widow too.
I remember my mom telling me at a very early age that women are only after a mans money. I thought she was just bitter. When older, I married long term thinking I was doing what I could to make things as good as I could. But I found that wasn't good enough, because after close to 3 decades of being together giving her love and loyalty, I was given notice. Now she resides on a 20 acre estate and rides her horses most days. Mom, you were right.
I will turn 28 years old this year and my mum told me the same. Its a bit weird because I have never met women (I am from europe) where the topic of money was important. I am not sure if this was the case because I was younger, a student and nobody cared, or I am going to experience the money topic soon because I am getting older or if its just the perception of most people. What I mean by that, if you focus on the money topic it will likely become a dominant topic. I never paid for girls big things, some times on a date a sprite or some shit like that but I never bought clothes, trips what ever. It was even the opposite, the girls that were really into me, bought stuff for me, cooked for me and so on. But I am preparing for a different decade...
@@Nadox15 often ppl dont talk about money directly. "Talk about money" could mean wanting "nice things", big house, holidays, you paying for all the meals, its status and lifestyle
My mum told me all women are whores.
Interesting that your mother of all people held that belief. My mother is full on "women good, men bad". Im terrified of ending up marrying a woman like her and only realizing it when it is too late..
@@Nadox15 you’re the man.
Imagine paying your boss after you get fired. And he gets to live in your house and dictates when and where you can see your kids, on top of that.
Actually in this case the boss (aka the job) and the man (the one in the relationship with the woman) are the ones that pay when getting fired/divorced. So the ones that get paid are "the man" in the case of the job with unemployment/severance package (if fired) and "the woman" in alimony/child support (when divorced).
@@IzNebula only problem with this analogy is that if you quit the job, you don’t get the severance package. Women can still get the metaphorical severance package even if they “quit the job” (they are the ones divorcing)
This was always the real sticking point for me. If the system wasn't set up how it is maybe I'd be more eager to chase the dream of finding myself a unicorn. But as it is the risks are so absurd. It's like, would you drive a car if there was a 60% chance the car would explode in a fireball within a few years? I'm thinking no...
Oh cmon, man up and take the sh1t deal like a real man 🤣😅
Not only do you know woman don't invest onto the relationship, but they're incentivized to leave no fault given the chance, and you'll be fleeced by the family courts.
Ahhh!...the Red Pill speaks! There is almost no analogy that illustrates the pain of this situation.
Whenever I ask my mom about her multiple marriages she always says “well would you stay at the same job if you weren’t happy” so yes you’re correct. It’s disturbing that they would relate a job to a relationship. Sure both are work but in marriage you take lifelong vows “through sickness and in health” it’s based on love not money. My mission now is to avoid women who treat me like a job.
Look foreign, only ones that treated me well, even as a friend (except older women), are often immigrants or foreigners. I am no expert, just my own experience. I think it is largely the fault of modern cultural desires and expectations.
when you figure out how, let me know!
It’s because for a woman a relationship is work. You can get burned out because you are the caregiver. You are expected to serve your husband. You are the one expected to hold shit together. All these men’s advice guys tell men how to get a woman but no guidance on how to keep one. Even if you don’t enter a relationship seeing it as a job it becomes one because of the role of women.
My advice. Be a man that doesn’t feel like a job. A lot do. Which is why I don’t want to be in a relationship.
@@alayhaferron1972 could you elaborate on that? You mean taking on household chores? What if you don't cohabitate?
@@user-ic9vz8sp1x how is a married couple not going to cohabitate? Furthermore, the role of women is not just to do chores. It’s to support your man and put his needs before yours. That’s exhausting to do.
I really love this type of ultra-realistic advice. It's so much better to be in touch with reality, and act accordingly, than to spend your whole life bemoaning the fact that life doesn't work in the way that you think it should.
Well put.
Word. You can be bitter about it or you can take it in stride and figure out how to use it to your advantage, doesn't change the fact that it still happens 😆 Control what you can, and don't get upset about what you can't
Exactly
True. I know a few happily married men. One thing I noticed is that these men contribute about 75% to the marriage and the women contribute about 25%. That is, that the men put in the lion's share of money into the family, and their entire waking moments is focused completely on the family, what the wife wants, and the maintaining the house and other assets. They also do much of the housework and cooking. The wives may contribute some finance but the jobs are typically low paying part time and are what the women want to do for self-fulfillment. The wives have hobbies and other extra-curricular activities. The men do not.
This sort of balance seems to be what is necessary for a (chance) at a happy marriage. Now if the men are happy with the arrangement, and dedicating your life to others certainly gives a feeling of purpose, then no problem, but never think that marriage is an equal partnership, its always been a host/parasite relationship where all the resources of the male is sucked dry to ensure the success of the offspring. This is how nature is constructed.
the only problem it is a bullshit. Men focus on 10% of hot women, totally ignoring the 90% rest, as "too average" and os on. Most of those dating advice are such bullshit.
Women don’t only judge your finances and ambition, but also your height, race, looks, style and confidence.
And look at men requirements for a wife. She just has to be pretty , sweet and a loyal person.
Funny, it just occurred to me that both sexes are looking for unicorns
And size of body parts, and skin quality, and capacity to defend from danger and how much are you respected by other men.
You missed the most important measuring stick... what OTHER women think of you. A woman who is not interested at all will become so if other women like a guy. A woman who is deeply infatuated with a guy will completely lose interest if her peer group does not approve.
Yeah, but mainly your money. In reality women don't like sex the way men do, so physical attraction has little to do with it. Women look at sex as the price they have to pay to get a man's money. Just like a hooker.
I had to listen a few times at first but I realize this might be the best analogy of Hypergamy I have ever heard. Had to subscribe! Truly appericate your work
Thanks for the love, lion. Glad to have you
@@psychacks you are good my sir!
Yea if you listen to any women describing her “ideal man”, she is describing a superior.
@@mstp14 This is why the “equality” talk is absolute B.S.
@@Pride0FTh3Lion No. Men and women are equal. Women hate it when men act like their superior because he is a man. BUT they want their male partner to be superior. He can be the leader because he is a better leader than her, not because he is the man. Subtle but important difference.
Six minutes to say "A woman doesn't want you, she wants what you have, so have more than the next guy." Frankly I prefer my choice of piling up savings and skipping dealing with such a creature at all.
Why paying hourly is best
It's about nuance. There are bad people, of course, who think money is the answer. But some women work really hard on themselves, so they want someone who shows up in life with the same guts. A competent man is very sexy. Competence is about facing life's struggles, like a weapon that is forged in fire.
@@Elven. I see some women who work really hard on physical fitness, but not on their personalities. Cold, mean and selfish has become the rule.
@@palaceofwisdom9448 it's hard to know who is and who isn't working on themselves. We as women are tempted to say all men are such and such. But, in my opinion, it's about learning our psychological differences while maintaining respect for the other. The more I work on myself, the less I give any of my time to people who don't want to improve
It's also only half of the equation. Women have one night stands and "situationships" with guys that they have no hope of advancing into a real relationship with all the time. The guy who tries to attract women by giving her the most things is the bigger fool than the guy who doesn't play the game at all.
The truth is that marriage used to be about a virgin agreeing to become a man's wife for the rest of their lives. There's just nothing like that bond in existence today
What a wonderful bond that would be. I could only dream of such a bond
It exists in my country (Lebanon).
In Islamic countries, virgin wife sticking to husband until his death is still the norm.
now, most of the men are virgins... trying to find a woman with a body count less than 50.
not only Islamic, conservative countries also have this. AND Islamic countries also have westernized women who sleep around, including muslim girls in the West
In other words, women never really love you, they love what you can provide.
Well, if you control the resources, what do you expect?
@@joygibbons5482 I guess not unconditional love.
@@joygibbons5482 She can't get a job?
@@themodernawakenedperspecti4457 unconditional love between two adults doesn't exist and it never did. Men can't do it, women can't do it. Unconditional love only exists from a parent to a child.
@@joygibbons5482 if you're referring to the patriarchy you're delusional. These men are struggling. They are not in control of you're fake patriarchy. This is just your attempt to throw men off balance so they don't know your status chasing behavior.
I'm a woman and I instantly understood the concept. I believe it might not apply to a very tiny minority of women, but since most people are contaminated with modern philosophy, yes, it applies for most women.
But that's not philosophy, that's biological reality. It was always like this.
@@Wargulpartal Hmm, It's both. Modern philosophy has made some natural impulses extremely easy to act on. It's not that it was always this way at all in the actions people took. It this way now because breaking up and finding others (or being offered more) is exponentially easier than even 20 years ago.
It makes sense that people will want the best they can get , it also makes sense that society can function.
Unfortunately, the second goal isn't even in second place to self interest, it not even in the race at all anymore.
Literally, not even a consideration. Social cohesion through values which temper the "out of control" aspects of human nature, are for the most part extinct.
We are already in the post-appocalyptic dating world. The "bomb dropped" sometime in the mid 2000s, and it's been hell since.
@@BudoReflex It's not since mid 2000s it started - processes only accelerate then and there. The desease started earlier. It was the social emancipation to blame.
Feminism was a symptom, cutural revolution was a significant stage of desease development. After that the desease only accelerates.
Equality sucks balls and blow dicks. Equality was a gate to the world of extortion and female suppremacy.
Women had evolved to survive unequal social environment. And they did. When the force is the law and you lack strength and power, to survive you must lie, cheat and switch sides on every opportunity. Imagine a creature with this kind of second nature. How it would behave after all of sudden being placed in egalitarian civilization?
Exactly.
That beast would take a mile every time it had being proposed to take an inch.
That's why we have single mothers plague, that's why women are netto beneficials of taxes, men being netto payers of taxes, men being vast majority of deaths and homelessness, AND YET the women being considered "the oppressed" regardless.
Time to wake up to real world, Neo.
@@Wargulpartal hmm, indeed the roots of modern trouble didn't start in the mid 2000s, I was referring to the smart phone and apps, which I should have been explicit about, for clarity in communication.
Lying and cheating, changing sides etc is a human trait, not just a female one.
Both genders are being tricked by their own nature. As you point out, many women are exploiting the modern laws and culture; which is actually the same sociopathic culture yet now reversed.
The video points out a fantastic way of understanding how most women view men. Certainly, it's an ancient reality. However, even that being said, it's still a natural "slight of hand".
Human nature itself is a trick. That trick being each of us is a 'self' which is capable of utter brutality.
I appreciate the perspective given, and the woman whose comment we are responding too.
Seeing how things are working allows us the possibility of not taking it personally, and rather looking into the very nature of 'self' and becoming free of that trick.
Apologies for the essay! 😋
@@BudoReflex Definitely, men aren't suited to lie and cheat as women. Men were dominant and direct, and were more loyal than women.
As I see, people, including you, are not used to call women cowards. But we all definitely call men cowards, when they behave like women.
Don't play simmetrist to me. There's no simmetry in nature. If you started your redpilled journey, be honest and get redpilled all the way. Courtesy is a terrible excuse to defend wide spread lies.
Man this progression thing is so true. They always want to make 'the next step' or 'move things forward'. Never understood the rush! But it's true, it's their main goal
And this is also why getting men to believe the notion that women are somehow romantic is so dangerous, to a society.
Women play a game of snakes and ladders. Men are either snakes or ladders, but the goal is to always move up.
They want the contracts signed quick ... for the divorce $$$ and house/car etc ... and then can move onto the next deal ...
@@midnightsplusnoonsis730LEOLegal prostitution. Make sure you’re not with a glorified prostitute that’s for sell to the highest bidder.
This dawned on me a few years ago. Women see relationships as a business, it’s not personal to you, the guy. It’s just a deal. Better one comes along - see ya! Men do relationships for real. It’s not business, it is personal. This is why women walk away from marriages laughing and the guy is devastated- he was in it for real, she just found him temporarily useful…
Exactly, sad, but mostly true. Happened to me....
Don't get married or in any long term relationship. Problem solved
Until recently most cultures considered marriage a business transaction. We would be better off to call it what it is....
So there is no difference between an open relationship and a commited relationship? Or maybe these labels should be clearly used, so both parties are on the same page?
I haven't been in a relationship for a long time, but I've heard of women that end up devastated because of their divorce. Losing a lifelong relationship, going to the psychiatrist and taking pills because the man is sleeping with another woman. Maybe it's about learning to be sane and mature about who we are and who we want to be with. This war between men and women, where one side fuels prejudices against the other, is getting out of hand.
What usually happens is the woman gets a call from a recruiter who acts like she hired. She takes the job and works it for a while. Then the new job tells her she really doesn’t have the job after all. This is after she’s been working hard to please the new employer for a while. Then she tries to get her old job back and hopes they don’t know she was working for someone else the whole time she was gone.
Exactly
you describe my mother what she did to my dad
@@Jaapst my mom did it to my dad also. My sister did it to her husband. I’ve had two wives do it to me. Every friend and acquaintance I have has also had their wives do it to them. I don’t know anyone who hasn’t gone through it. Women nowadays are absolutely horrible.
Growing up, I've noticed that women are more willing to jump ships than men, but they want to make sure that they land on the other ship before they take off the former one. That's why there's usually a month of overlap in dating two men. It's too much of a risk to do the right thing to break it off before you see other people.
Edit: typo
I normally wait until she has left her partner for sure, then i don't give in. I don't like the concept they play, it's cheating wether they admit it or not.
Its pretty obvious if she will do it to him she will do it to you
Indeed, best way to go.
100 it's dishonest cheating. It's a big character test, and if she did it for you, she'll do it to you.
Monkey Branching 101
This is great insight, just confirms the basic premise of always treating a woman as an option, and never get overly invested in her, because she is doing exactly that, with you. You can be replaced the moment something better comes along. Never be afraid to walk away and replace her if a better option presents itself and will be better for you in the long run.
At the same time, you have to make sure you are providing as much value as an 'employer' that you can give, so that your 'employees' stick around for as long as possible and do a good job.
Just because you can replace them doesn't mean you build your whole operation around that, but yeah definitely need to be prepared to do so if you have to
@@thecurrentmoment Great conversations in this thread. Let me extend that analogy. Over the course of your lifespan (as a male employer) you may reach the point where you've allready had the job performed by employees that you need (fertility, reproduction, your legacy is assured). After this, your need for reproduction drops and all future employees have relatively less to offer (basically sex and companionship), and as the years wear on, then it will be just companionship.
@@thomaskatt4450 sounds reasonable and based on reality. When I hear people wanting a long-term partner just for 'companionship' without getting married, it is usually people that are older and already have kids. I don't usually hear of young single never married people with no kids talking about settling down with someone just for companionship
Facts, but if we're thinking big picture, this is bad for society, but unfortunately the back isn't in our court
Let’s all have shallow feelings for our disposable partners, so we don’t get invested and form real relationships with each other, so we can still feel lonely in the company of others. Sounds delightful!
Hearing this doesn't make me want to be more successful with relationships. It makes me want to avoid them. No woman would ever put up with a man that treated their relationship like this. And yes, I understand that hypergamy doesn't care.
I agree, to an extent.
I'm just now leaving a f'd up relationship(7years), where I gave my everything in order to actualize my, "idea" of what a family should/ought to be. Especially coming from a background of a broken home/no mother, I did everything I could to make it happen, even acquiesced to her cheating on me multiple times, and treating me like a babysitter.
But with this revelation, I am able to plot a more advantageous strategy for my future.
Hope, is not lost.
Become that which you are/were meant to Be.
Fantastic, and you shall have the options you deserve to choose from.
Best of luck to you on your Journey here on Earth.
@cizzymac the irony is that a great many women put up with men who treat the relationship like this, simply because it communicates to her that he is higher value than she and is therefore worth pursuing/keeping around
@@musashiwebbreading that sucks man, I hope that you eventually acquire a woman that will do you good bro
When women trade up; they have no remorse, no regret, no afterthought. They are cold creatures; Thank GOD the online manosphere exist to educate men.
"No woman would ever put up with a man that treated their relationship like this." True. But women and men are not the same, and they don't want the same things from each other, generally...
I saw how my father was struggling in life by taking a caring woman and children who don't care about him and at 15 I promise to myself i will never be a slave to a woman and children. 20 years later i think i made the best decision ever. I think peace, freedom and quietness is priceless 🙏
From what I've noticed, this is something people do when they are young and driven to "make it". They look for material resources. But the older people get, the more they start caring about spiritual wellbeing. Their goals shift from "is this person aflunet" to "do you understand me? And if you do, can you accept me, bruises and all?". I've noticed this in older couples vs younger couples. I think emotional maturity & financial security both play a role in allowing vulnerability to flourish in a relationship.
yeah, and it's really annoying when you are the young person, but have the mentality of the older person
Amen
@@andrewparsons3277And double amen. I will say this, though. The older I get, I’m in approaching 30, I feel I am finally slowly, but surely finding deeper more real connections that match my value system. It’s way easier being in my later 20s than it was being in my early 20s- Dating, relationships, friendships, professional colleague connections and all.
To all men with a good or great income. To all men who are ambitious. To all men who are kind. NEVER, EVER GET MARRIED UNLESS THE CURRENT DIVORCE/"FAMILY" LAWS CHANGE.
Even if it does change im not marrying
I am not marring
Those men are targets. Get RPA.
@@mbg9650 A pre-nup only protects assets that were acquired BEFORE the marriage. A man will lose more than half of his assets acquired during the marriage. He'll lose his business....or be required to give her a bunch of money. He'll lose his house......or be required to give her a bunch of money. He'll lose his children..........almost definitely. He'll be required to pay the ex-partner "spousal support" for years after the divorce. He'll be required to pay exorbitant child support.....that is paid directly to the ex-partner until the kids are 18 to 21.
The man (or woman if she is the high earner) will lose most of his life's work......and future earnings. A pre-nup does nothing for this.
How'd that pre-nup work out for Paul McCartney, Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, Kevin Costner, Steven Spielberg and millions of other men.
Don't play the game if the game is rigged against you. Don't get married.
I hope if I can change my sexuality and become gay. And be with a person who loves me as I do❤
This is very powerful and certainly helps explain women who trade up. But it is also about as depressing as it gets. Bottom line is, every man is just an option. This also helps explain who women like to keep a stable of orbiters around. Perhaps one of them will end up being better than their husband.
Not all women are like that, you avoid the women who keep men orbiting. If she says she still friends with her ex for example, you know whats up.
One of those orbiters might get a large inheritance or win lotto.
this is why, as a man, you MUST keep a stable of good women around. spend very little time with them, but you must always remind them that you 'see' them as options.
women love poaching (pre-selection) men from other women so WEAR YOUR WEDDING BAND. do not take it off... it's a chick magnet.
@@53strat55 All women are like that it is biology.
@@53strat55 If she is shy or afraid of men than she avoid men orbiting.
Also men don't get suckered in by her feelings for you, it's just a front even if she doesn't fully realizes it. Just ask her to do something she doesn't like for you or talk about something she doesn't like ... and see how her attitude changes !
I've been at the receiving end of a great relationship with the phrase, "we had really good times, but I think it's time for us to move on." I was like wow, I thought that the relationship was more than just "good times". This just did it for me. There is no love in relationships. There is only the feelings felt at that very moment. Sure those feelings could be good for a string of days, weeks, months or years, but they will come to an end likely before the three year mark if unmarried and seven year mark if married. Trust me, I know.
So why should men invest in something so unreliable?
@@inconnu4961 Precisely. Never go into a contract with another person who gets rewarded for breaking it.
@@inconnu4961 logically speaking, they shouldnt. But most of us are hardwired to want the opertunity to pass our genes to the next generation
This is really good information. A lot of pain and confusion can be solved by this video. A lot of men believe a woman should love them for them and not be attached to what they are and have. This job analogy really drives the point home.
If anything it just makes men feel more helpless. "All I am to her is a means to an end."
@@drcidd8153 It does, depending on how you look at it. Reality is not pretty at times.
The truth will set you free
@@idesel I'm definitely not top 20% material, and there's definitely better than me out there, yet I'm still married, 13 years later. High value women still exist.
@@drcidd8153 she's probably just not very bright or ambitious lol
The issue is narcissism. All narcissistic people see others as a means to their ends. Narcissistic people use others like pawns in a game. You don't have a personal relationship with the chess pieces, you just play them to win. Narcissistic people use others to manipulate situations to elevate themselves above all. It's like they think they are the only real people in the world and everyone else is a character in their story. I know women and men who are not like this and I know women and men who are like this. That proves the issue is deeper than gender. Do a little research on narcissism and you will be grateful that you did.
no, the issue is that nearly all women are narcissistic
@@impudentdomain I agree, the issue is narcissism.
This psychack guy sounds like a fresh and fit employee
And women, on the whole, are narcissists…
You're describing all the women I know.
This is true. What screws this up for men is marriage. This is why men should not get a marriage license. Let her bounce, but not with your money. That incentivizes the jobs package 😂
There are some states where she can still take your stuff in a civil case if you simply live together.
@@ethanmoon3925
What? That's nuts, how is this lawfully allowed?
@@thalmoragent9344 She would have to go to civil court and say that she was leaving a "common law" or "defacto" marriage due to domestic violence. In some cases she will get a court order in her favor and the guy will only be notified later, you know... for her safety.
@@ethanmoon3925
Heck yea. Many states have already circumvented the “men not getting married” plan. In some areas you can have issues kicking a woman out if you let her stay with you for a few weeks.
@@ethanmoon3925 that’s why you don’t move in with them
When the student is ready, the teacher appears. Thank you Orion💯💯
this.
Thank you for this clear-headed assessment of relationships. Learning this lesson helps a man understand the rapacious lack of morals in most women's minds. It is not immoral for a man to leave a job for a better job, but it IS immoral for a woman to leave her man for another man, especially if she's married to him. Men who grew up with traditional Judeo-Christian values will find this sort of mindset absolutely unconscionable, but it is how most women make decisions. As others in the comments section have noted, a man can be a literal millionaire celebrity and his wife will still file for divorce so she can bang a convict. A man's objective value does not matter; the only thing that matters is a woman's perception, and this changes on a daily basis. Giving women the legal authority to leave her man on a whim is one of the greatest evils a government could inflict on its people, and it has wrought uncountable sufferings.
No fault divorce has a lot to answer for to society.
No wonder more traditional societies don't allow women to devorce men (for example some muslim societies).
Very well said, Mr. selohcin.
Thanks for explaining, there was a time when the Bible was the basis for self control of what is spoken about in this video. Needless to say that time has passed.
Brutal. The total lack of empathy towards men is psychopathic. I’ve seen over and over, men put their sweat and blood into relationships trying to make her happy. Saying things like ‘happy wife, happy life’. And then she leaves for a better opportunity lol.
The red pill community got it right. Don’t invest much into it. Always be ready to leave. The men who live life for themselves seem way happier than the guys slaving away for people completely unable feel any appreciation for his effort.
Even as a person with no psychology background, I've been saying this for years.
understanding women is not difficult. but once you do, they lose all their charm.
I think as men, we're just blinded by hormones, especially when we're younger. And women definitely take advantage of this. Now I'm in my 40s and single, I see women as more of a hazard to avoid than anything else and wonder why I couldn't see their true nature when I was younger. It seems so obvious to me now that it's almost laughable.
True I understood women. And learn a very important lesson.
Ha ha. I got a dog someone wanted to give up and he's great. Not exactly same as being with a women but you do get unconditional love - something that is never unconditional with a women. That's why it's so bad what happens now with social media and dating apps... If men don't care about being with women we will get a big problem in society. We do so much just to get a woman and then keep a woman... Unfortunately reality is that to get and have a woman you must have things. Especially later in life... Thats why I don't really believe getting love from chicks past wall - they calculate too much. Best relationships I've seen among my friends are when they met each other when they were young and both didn't have many partners. Red Pill guys claim that it's better when a guy have many partners andaybe now that is true, as apparently women in U. S. stack bodies like onlu professionals would do few years ago. Guys from those successfully relationships I know are faithful though and I'm pretty sure about it and most normal people would want that. I think you have to be with someone seriouslt damaged to have to have them in this constant insecurity state and not enjoy peace of mind of having confidence that your partner is not going to cheat. Last thing I will say, you can't be with someone that you think settled for you. In that case there always can be someone with a better (job) offer.
Looking back, I now realize how fortunate I was to have made the decision to stay single. That decision came about solely from my observation of how many divorces were taking place between people I knew personally. I thought that if they couldn’t make it work, I probably couldn’t do any better so I didn’t take the chance.
no offence ment my man that sounds like a loser mentality
@@GIDEONgamesounds like a winning mentality to me. He’s just playing the odds.
This is just describing hypergamy but putting it in nice simple language for men because they’ve never been taught this and women have never admitted to this. It’s one of those great facts of life that no one wants to talk openly about because it’s politically incorrect to say these things.
Probably one of the most up to date, realistic, videos on modern intersexual dynamics there is on the internet.
This is a great analogy for men as it’s very relatable. It also shatters the false image young men have of the woman loving you for you vs. what you provide. Better men learn this at an early age.
briffault's law... look it up.
I'm aghast. This should be on bumper stickers on the back of every car, plastered on billboards, taught in school! Spread the word!!! There is no counting how men's lives would have been less dramatic and anxiety ridden, how much more financially secure, and professionally developed we all could have been!
You have changed the entire paradigm of male/female motivations and goals regarding relationships, and how they will progress over time. Definitely an eye opener. I wish that I had this insight after my military service and grad school. Really a ton of food for thought.Thanks
Spot on! Several years into my career, I noticed this myself as I was getting bombarded by job offers, as I was responding to them the same way that I was often being treated by some women (sometimes with a polite no, sometimes by ignoring them, though some women were also responding rudely, which is not something I would do myself). For a man, there's no way around improving yourself and having the patience and wisdom to vet the options and wait for a suitable mate, instead of wastng months or years with the first desperate woman who gives you some attention.
The hypergamy factor should , in all fairness, have an impact on family courts. As more than 70% of divorces are initiated by women it would benefit the judges deciding about alimony, child support and custody.
80%
And if she is college educated, 90%.
Here's what The counter argument is: "omg well women just HAVE TO initiate divorce because the men won't listen to them when they say what they need"
Yes, as it's never the woman's fault because of innate gynocentrism. Crazy how she only has agency when the man's to blame.
how quaint, you are still under the delusion that the family court system cares about fairness or about the well being of men !
Child support and custody need a huge overhaul, but alimony should not exist. Adults can pay their own way in life.
Imagine telling a woman in divorce court that she needs to show up several times a week to cook dinner, do grocery shopping, clean the house, do laundry, and have sex with her ex. That is the equivalent of men paying alimony.
Oh man, this reminds me of a girl who was sizing me up for a relationship.
We went out a couple of times. She was all business and had an agenda.
She ended up with a guy twice her age.
Men peaks around 40's and 50's. Women peaks around 18-29. It makes sense why women go after older guys and it is the resources the guy has collected over the years which is what women really want in their lives 'security'.
@@Trancymind it's best not to invest in a woman at any age as it brings in deminishing returns. If you have children when you die. Make sure the money goes to them and not the clout chaser
@@christopherbrooks225I’ve literally seen a woman and her friends celebrate her longtime husband’s death at his funeral, because she would be “taken care of”.
This just made me even more sceptical of having a relationship with a woman; it’s absolutely sad. I mean what is the point
This is exactly the issue. Understanding the nature of many women's motivations for being with men is likely to put you off them entirely.
It would have been interesting if humans were bisexual, would any men partner up with a female when there were so many sensible males they were attracted to?
I've been right on the edge of never pursuing a girlfriend again for a while. Everytime I see a girl at a bar with their boyfriend and then notice their behavior *without* their boyfriend the very next weekend it makes me think it's just a waste of time
My ex wife has gotten together with a guy who gave her a car and she wants to move my son out of state to move in with him. I on the other hand am now with a girl with a more prestigious career than mine who is a little bit older than me and more, quirky looking than I. Our relationship is the best I ever had, I'm not into her for status though I was a fan of her work before we met, however I feel like I get some weird looks from ppl. Life is strange.
I do sometimes dislike the usage of "high value" woman or "high value" man. Depends what you value, but I guess it makes sense in terms of your appeal to like the average member of the opposite sex.
@@jimsteinmanfan80 Wouldn't make a difference, largely due to men's biological differences. The fact that women are essentially incapacitated due to childbirth and that men are physically larger and stronger than women on average introduces the asymmetry, itself. Even if men and women were bisexual, women would still chase men for survival reasons, and men would support women for reproductive reasons.
As someone else said, this doesn't make one want to improve and keep relationships, it makes a sensible person want to avoid them. Why waste time on someone or on a relationship as whole, if they'd leave you whenever something better comes around. Life shifts around and constantly focusing on performing at your peak isn't the kind of life I'd want to live. Companionship should be something that treasures shared experiences as well as shared work and effort towards mutual goals. But in my experience it's easier for women to throw it all away for a better opportunity.
Here's the thing I always wonder about this dynamic: What about women's attachment needs? Are these needs a priority for women too? Because they act like they have no attachment needs, that relationship is all transactional. I know that for a lot of men, part of the desire for a monogamous relationship is the drive to get our attachment needs met, and enjoy close companionship with someone. For men, this isn't connected necessarily to her status level, her income, or anything else. It's about if he feels connected to her. Is it that women get their attachment needs met by family and friends? What's the difference here, because it seems so counterintuitive that women-- who even 30 years ago were very hung up on feeling emotional connection with their partner-- now seem to not have any attachment needs at all.
Hm. I think that love and attachment are two different things. People get attached to things they don't even really like all the time. Think of how hard it is for some folks to go through their closets and give away old clothes.
@@psychacks To be clear, I mean attachment as in Attachment Theory / Developmental Psych.
Attachment theory is the theory of how we experience forming bonds as young children, and how that impacts our ability to form connections for the rest of our lives.
If you're not familiar with it, it's well worth learning about. It's a very deep topic, which has massive implications for adult relationships.
Attachment theory is somewhat connected to evolutionary psych, in that it's understood that the development of our attachment system was something that happened with our species over millenia.
Interestingly, I think what you're talking about in this video-- which is essentially hypergamy-- is also a competing / conflicting evolutionary drive. And my question essentially is: what's the healthy integration here? Are women being socialized out of tending to their own connections needs in order to maximize gain from a more material perspective?
@@infinitedurr this is exactly what is missing from both his analysis and from our society and institutions. The dismal perspective is combined with the dismal acceptance of the problem of failure to make and keep attachments that are good for our society and species including a stable environment for raising children and investing our lives in our spouses and our children with sufficient social and legal support for keeping commitments even when, from a narrow individual perspective, it may seem advantageous to trade in our spouse for someone else.
The ‘traditional’ approach is a combination of financial commitment and a legal commitment that restricts divorce and remarriage. As the marital estate has become divisible at will by either spouse and each spouse may unilaterally divorce and remarry, virtually all social support for commitment has been jettisoned leaving only animal instincts and private cost benefit analysis to drive divorce and remarriage rates to about 40% in 25 years.
And the attachment theory, in terms of helping people who are having marriage difficulties is also a valuable therapy. I say this from personal experience. Human beings really do need and thrive when their attachment needs are met and marriage, the traditional type with legal and financial commitment, is the best way for society and for individuals to have stability and to be socialised and to function in gentle, cooperative and non-violent ways.
As a society we have not ruled and mastered the beasts, we have been mastered by our animal instincts and have degenerated into atomised individuals, having relationships and children almost at random, in unstable and insecure household structures. Fertility rates have plummeted to the point that we cannot even replace the population each generation and we aren’t fulfilling the cultural mandate to be fruitful and to multiply stable “male and female” units.
@@psychacks sir, with respect, I request your attention to this matter and to try to address it. The dynamics you address are quite descriptive and analytical, but seem to be missing the need for and social and economic functions of attachment and commitment in addressing our animal instincts to trade in one sexual partner for another (or, as you point out, for others, plural). Casual sex, divorce and remarriage and polygamy are not good for society or for individuals most of the time. A stable and secure and exclusive pair-bond is good for society and for individuals most of the time.
@@hillaryfamily Good point but for the purpose of his advice it's irrelevant. He merely addresses the primary factor as to how women view men as far as remaining with them or not. This does not require the inclusion of additional factors which may apply to an existing relationship such as marriage and children.
You are totally spot on;
This has precisely been the experience of all my male friends.
When the bigger ice cream truck comes along the women jump ship precisely the way you mentioned.
Thanks much for the video and guidance
Key point here is that people's goals come before the relationship. That's a common theme from other experts (male or female), but expressed in the most brutal and honest way.
Brilliant
All this proves is what people perceive as "love" is really circumstantial , A tether of "trust" until the next best thing.
This makes so much sense! I'm gonna re-watch this over and over again until I absorb it all.
This is an interesting idea. Thanks Ryan, puts a current situation with my employer in perspective for sure.
The insight, the analogies! This is one of the best channels on UA-cam
I just discovered this channel today. Its pure gold. So much to learn.
Yep, my mom is a complete selfish sociopath who used and abused everyone in order to further her own self interest and had absolutely no care for anyone.
You're lucky if she even entertains the proper break up. Just being completely selfish and avoiding difficult conversations just to spare themselves the stress.
More and more low value or "ratchet" girls out there and growing rapidly. "The smart vs dumb paradox".
Two follow up points:
1. Recently I took some real estate courses. One of the major key point I learned, while it sounds obvious as I recite it now, is: We represent the person that hired us. We work for them. We work WITH the other side and their agents.
2. I wonder if living conditions needs to be harsh so people's incentives align easier, such as trying to survive, which leads to better quality relationships. I wonder if abundance brings out the disagreeableness in people.
Over the course of a lifetime the average woman gets hold of forced social transfers worth about a million dollars from the average man. That is why women on average are not so interested in men in high tax countries, like pretty much all western countries today. They just get what they want by the government gun. They don't need a personal provider or producer when they can just order most men around with the money they got from him for free. And they've got the voting majority. So you are on point.
I would agree on the second point. The real issue is that men and women's behaviors are regulated in different ways. Men's behavior is regulated because of the threat of violence from other men, and the threat of "extinction" from women's rejection. Women's behavior is not regulated by men or women at all, however, and is only regulated by their own survival needs. When times are tough, women *_have_* to get along with men if they want to survive. This dependency on men for survival, and men's dependency on women for reproduction is what regulates men and women's behaviors.
The problem occurs when men are so productive that they end up creating a society so prosperous and efficient that women's needs are met by men "collectively" rather than being met by an "individual" man. Once times are "good" to the point where she can depend on all of the systems in place created and maintained by men "collectively", then she never has to treat a "specific" man well, which means her behavior can be as poor as she likes, and she can treat relationships like an accessory or a "career." This ends up creating such a drain on the system that it eventually crumbles, until you end up with hard times again, and women having to go back to "behaving" if they want an individual man to provide for them. This is why women are "feminist" when times are comfortable, but then become "traditional" when times are tough.
1. Point directly to the fact that men always compete for status and so the most attractive women represents the man she is with very well
@@latt.qcd9221 a superb summation of the situation. I have often said that when the social fabric tears, the "Karens" of the world will become the most submissive. They may be obnoxious and brazen, but they are not dummies. They know they can get away with this behavior now, but will instantly sing a different tune when needed.
@@latt.qcd9221 I think your analysis may be more accurate, than any other I've read. I tend to agree with it
This makes perfect sense! She is always in search of something better to advance her goals in life. It's not personal it's female nature. That's why it's always good for men to keep this in mind when dating. And always remember the ramifications of getting married, the biggest one is getting divorced and giving her half of everything. Tread lightly and think long before you make that type of commitment.
HOLY SHIT.
This is quite possibly the top 3 most valuable information I've ever come across in my entire life(32 years old).
All I want is a good(honest/loyal/disciplined) wife/children/life.
I f'd up the one I attempted to create that reality with(gave 7 years of my life, sacrificed careers/financial security/home and wealth building opportunities), and she worked quite the number on me(first time I'd ever been betrayed, multiple times, too).
This is pure Gold. Thank you.
Hello, quite similar experience as yours, this understanding is pure gold.
Every woman, takes the relationship like a job, she works it, that is why she always feel so serious, not easily enjoying it but working and complaining about it.
And in all of that, love is not the center of her view. This is so terrible to realize, but i could sense it in a certain way: women are not at peace in theri relationship, and it is the same with children, always worrying like they are going to be considered as failure, this mechanism, has its place, same as our mechanism, but it has taken too much place.
Could they take put all this mechanism of theirs into perspective with love, that would be perfect! And same for us regarding our mechanism
can you share the other 2 ?
A question often asked is “where have all the good men gone?”. The answer is…, they got screwed and learned there was no point in being good anymore
Moral of the story: stay away from employees with multiple 6 month 1099 stints 😹😹😹
In all seriousness, once I realized this I lost a lot of interest in LTR’s. I’ve never needed to date much, and I’ve always received a lot of sexual attention=free 🐈🐈🐈. This dynamic reduces my life to work, being an employee/employer, 24/7. Additionally, this also reinforces ‘my money is my money, his money is my money’. I’d much rather spend my time working, and investing my time and energy into my personal interests and relationships that I find fulfilling. I come home to take a nap, eat, and enjoy my space, not to manage an unruly employee 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
PS: most of the time I get hit on, it’s by married/attached ladies, so what’s the f&@$ing point?
It is because they see you as a better employer, so they want to know if you are a solid deal before divorcing the other man.
what LTR stands for? ( English is not my first language)
@@dcjkl8088
LTR=Long Term Relationships
What is your secret to being hit on? Despite being above-average in looks, I have never received attention from women. I have always been the one initiating contact with women.
@@graciousSenor exercise, nutrition, good rest. I usually do things that make me feel happy, that are active, and that makes me feel good. I also don’t overtalk, and let women do most of the talking… it’s basic, but it works
seemingly, it all comes down to $ - man chases money and woman chases man with money . what would this world do without all of this printed money
Thank you Dr. Orion.
This is excellent! Very well articulated and connected the ideas great.
Yes this is spot on thanks for the realisation.
This was put to me in the most simple way thank you sir
I want to thank you for sharing your insights, especially this one! It resonates very much with me, my experience and observations. And helps to make it conscious and stay aware of it. It all contributes to understand humans and therefore understanding oneself.
This was genius, and I appreciate the deep thought put into it. I will consider what this means and may apply this way of thinking.
This really rings true. Well said. I wish i learned this years ago.
This is only the second video I've seen from this guy and both have been very enlightening. I would like to hear him discuss the lack of logic and critical thinking that goes into a women using this thought process when ending a relationship. My personal experience has been women do not think of the "big picture". The decision they make to leave for the better option is often times a temporary thing. The new guy is on his best behavior trying to lure her to him. Just like a job that sounds really awesome, you should really ask yourself why did the last employee leave and why do they even need to search for a new candidate, they should have list of people begging for it.
They want the best lifestyle they can possibly get in life. Other things are lower priority.
I think this about sums up where we’re at in the last 5 years.
1. The compensation package you have won’t matter when there are abundant options. Good or bad.
2. As long as there is the internet and social media there won’t be monogamy or faithfulness.
Damn that was cold, but I love it. "People's goals come before their relationships. A man's goals come before his relationship to his employer, and a woman's goals come before her relationship to a man."
This is true for Women I have even seen women in my family act like this towards men it's also about progression it's not only about pleasure but finding a man that would provide them with a good future.
DOC! THIS VID IS F'ING BRILLIANT. thank you for producing it.
This is so powerful, many thanks
This is such a simple idea, yet, I am profoundly shocked!
This is actually something that i heard in my Church in the classes for young couples. This is one of the reason the Bible forbids sex outside of marriage and divorce, to prevent both men and women, but specially women, from acting on their selfish natural impulses. If divorce is taboo, women will have no choice but to remain with their husband whether they find a better partner or not. Hypergamy used to be tightly controlled by religious culture. While that may appear oppressive to women, what happens in reality when we let women act on those impulses? They don't make wise choices at all.
What this analogy gets completely wrong is that hypergamy does not equate to a new job offer at all. Men rarely seek women who had already being taken, THEY DO NOT MAKE THEM A NEW OFFER. It's the women who observe the "better" men and convince themselves that they can get them. The women seek the offer for themselves, and they are rarely realistic about their chances of getting it.
It's not a logical choice at all, it's a primal impulse.
We are seeing this unfolding right now in modern dating with 80% flocking to the top 20% of men. Those numbers don't mean anything to them, if left to their peril they would rather die alone than settle for a dude that isn't Chad.
As such, we must control women and distribute them fairly to the male population through religious dogma that makes it taboo for people to remain single in adulthood, and to switch partners. The same goes for men, men must also not be allowed to follow their natural impulse to impregnate as much women as possible.
Exactly.
when you establish that utopia, how much will it cost to build a house there?
women have de-valued themselves in the name of empowerment and 'freedom.' that empowerment is to feel POWERFUL as they make choices to satisfy those impulses, and the freedom is exactly that... meaning freedom from HONORING the commitment of a man.
the result: the 'price' of vagina is at an all-time low as women are giving it away freely and easily, and women need to understand that men will NEVER complain about that. we'll enjoy the easy access... and after we're tired of it, or as it ages on the market, we'll go elsewhere to find traditional women to make wives.
you figured it out, once you know this, then it all makes sense
Highly agree. This religious dogma needs to come back
The best part is that I believe OkCupid got worse numbers. It's not 20%, it's about 6% if I remember the stat correctly. The 20% is the men that "will do", so temporary?
So insightful. Subbed. Thank you.
I've read many, many books on relationships, especially concerning romance and personality disorders. This is extremely insightful!!!!
This is so CLARIFYING!!
Eye opening 😮
Wow this is great. I never considered the fact that women had "relationship goals". I have zero relationship goals, only standards for what kind of woman I want to be with. I couldn't care less how and in what way the relationship progresses, so long as it's with the right woman and it feels right. But I do care about my career progression. The last thing I want to do is get stuck at an entry level position, and now I see the last thing an invested girl wants to do is get stuck at the girlfriend position. She's Jonesing for that fiancee to marriage with the guy she likes just as I would for a more senior position at the company I love working for.
This video was ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT! Well said, POINT DEFINITELY CONVEYED. I look forward to more...
This video is perfect. This is the best Analogy ever used to describe how women view men
Bottom Line: What a woman says she loves and cares about you then it's a lie from the get-go. She's generally not only lying to you but lying to herself. An employee wouldn't leave a job if they loved and cared about their employer. ... Anyway, I'm sure it's true in most cases.
Sounds like current relationships are very unstable if the woman is always up to taking a better “job”. Perhaps there’s a reason people across the world have used marriage to stabilize the relationship with a permanently binding commitment.
If men have this attitude. It would be like.
Man: I'm sorry, it's nothing personal, but this is a 8-point woman which align with my goals of a hot woman. You're a just an average woman, see you!
Man: Ah i'm sorry, she's a D-cup and you'r B's just don't cut it.
@hej There's certainly a lot of men who do that. But 3 out of 4 times it's women who end the marriage. And you do understand that men and women love differently, right? A good man will knowingly and willingly die to protect his woman. How many women throughout all of human history would willingly die to save her man? Gay men are over 3 times more likely to stay married than gay women. So, more often than not, it's not the man who ends the relationship. Also, women are typically incintivised to get a divorce, with the laws in their favor. And men are punished for initiating a divorce. Most women are pretty safe in their marriages with a man. And men unlike women, can't just go out and have casual sex with a woman who's exponentially more attractive than he is. A woman on the other hand, could be a 5 in looks, and still easily be able to have casual sex with a never ending amazing of men who are 8s, 9s, and 10s. Because men will lower their standards exponentially for casual sex. Men are beginning to wake up to this. Which is why men who have options, are just staying away from marriage all together. And the men in the bottom 50 to 60% are willing to get married, but most of them won't because even women on their level aren't interested in them, given that many of those average women least likely slept with several different men that are way out of their league.
@@xantonify , that's 100% the true opposite. except we don't get the hype-men equivalent of people who say "You go girl! get that bag!"
This is ingenious
The most simple and easy way to explain the dynamics
Thank you
Damn this analogy is great, awesome video!
I’m going to be 50 this year. I cannot wrap my head around what you are describing. It’s a very sad world we are living in, if this is true.
Great insight. Its 1000% true.
Excellent point you made about not taking it personal.
Honestly after watching your videos, the sigma male ideology starts to make more and more sense. The emblematic image is the sigma male standing at a desk or table doing his own thing (laptop, or craft or whatever), and a woman is standing behind him hugging him trying to get his attention, but he just ignores her.
I think the toughest pill for me to swallow is that the form of love and deep spiritual connection that I seek and need is impossible for women to provide. They can _fake_ it. But the only women who will truly love you and care about you are the ones you're blood-related to. (And even then, not always).
I grew up thinking I would eventually find that form of love I'm looking for. But the more I live and learn, the more I understand it was a mirage. It's not just that it hasn't happened so far. It's that it _cannot_ happen.
Sometimes I wish I was gay. Would stand a better chance than 0%, at least. 😔
"But the more I live and learn, the more I understand it was a mirage. It's not just that it hasn't happened so far. It's that it cannot happen." Very well said. It's hard for me to describe it exactly, but it leaves you with a gutted, empty feeling when looking for a partner.
@@chadplow824 quit looking. Problem solved
I feel the same way as a 28 yr man. You want to love but realize women are incapable unless it's your mother. Thats why the "you can either understand women or love them not both" will always ring true. This is a black pill for ya unfortunately.
You think too much of blood-relations. if you were butchered in their defense, even your mom would happily be the slave of the conqueror and quickly learn how he likes his hummus.
Same bro😔.
But i am happy for us that we understand reality. 🙂
Great title. Great analogy.
Amazing. Love it. Thank you, sir
You understand that this breaks marriage completely.
Completely.
Blows the doors right off of romanticism.
Romanticism was a cope by men for men, from another age. Needs to die in the dirt where it belongs.
Exactly. I'd rather live alone than with some Sociopath just bc she happens to have a vagina.
This is gold , thank you
Really amazing value thanks! 🙂
A woman is as loyal as her options
Very very instructive. I know what you said is true. Every man/woman romantic/sexual relationship is at its core a transaction. An employer/employee type transaction is a good way to describe it.
Caught you on F&F, had to dive in further. Amazing deductions, highly appreciative of your means of communicating these concepts. Subscribed.
What a hard pill to swallow. Some of us already knew this, but it really opened a new door in regards to a good employer not worrying about his employees leaving....
The unemployment rate after 30 is crazy though...
It never goes down after that number either. Nature don't play - its victims.
I'd say age 45.