"The riskier things you say, the more memorable and authentic you would be for them." This is soooo true! People whom you just met and just want to play safe and say mundane things or topics will not create an impact and a lasting memory.
breaking the ice gives you a tactical advantage over others. The goal here is not to keep talking, but to keep listening and keeping them as comfortable as you can.. Listening is the best way to do this
@@noideas439he's not wrong though. There are many advantages to this; people are more likely to help you later on in any way possible, even if you just say hello. I think it's better to just have a good relationship with anyone you meet.
For Step #2, an even better question is, "Where did you grow up?" This focuses on their formation as a person, rather than a simple location so it invites them to tell more about their childhood and how they grew up, especially if they moved around a lot/had a less conventional upbringing.
I always felt depressed when I did this. You just standing alone in the drama club, thinking on the next big talk or something , waiting for someone who would break the ice. That miserable ice on your back😢
While it's true that taking risks and being authentic can make you more memorable, it's important to strike a balance. Being overly risky or controversial may alienate some people and could have negative consequences. Authenticity is about being true to yourself and expressing your beliefs, but it's also crucial to consider the context and the impact your words may have on others. Effective communication involves understanding your audience, being mindful of the situation, and expressing yourself in a way that fosters connection rather than division. It's possible to be memorable and authentic without unnecessarily risking relationships or causing harm. Finding the right balance between expressing your true self and being considerate of others is key to effective and meaningful communication.
I wish I saw this video 1 month ago. During winter break I went on a cruise for 10 days and my whole routine there was wake up at 6am walk around everywhere on the ship and meet new people and talk with everyone until 3 am. It was one of my favorite experience in my life bc I suffered a lot with social anxiety when I was a kid and since I was 16 I would always try to surpass that and go talk to Stanger in my city. But this cruise was like my final exam. I literally became the most popular person on the boat and every 10min I would say hi to someone I know my friends could not believe it bc it was people from different social backgrounds it was so funny. But I still had some difficulty at some point I knew I needed more knowledge. Thanks again.
I just realised I'm really good at talking to people, But terrible at step 1 and step 2. He was like "here's where it's tricky" and I thought "wait, that's the easy part!" Getting over the anxiety and just feeling good, Having that energy that others will want to talk to you is so important! I think one big piece of helpful advice is~ target people who are bored! I was at an airport with a long line that wasn't moving and everyone wanted to talk to me!
If you have the energy theyll start talking to you, but isnt necessary id say if you start the conversation. Like, last time i struck a conversation like that i was on the plane, and after some time i got bored, looked at the person next to me, he looked at me, and i just said the first thing that came to mind and the conversation kept going. (dont remember it too well now)
i just realized i'm exactly the same lol. i find approaching someone and starting a conversation so difficult, but once the ice is broken, i can talk for hours on end.
I tend to overthink what people may think of me or what they might say or how my interaction with them as a whole might go but to honest with u majority of people are really simple. I be getting my anxiety up for nothing 😭
Thats me bruh literally mirrored everything Its so annoying, we'll get over it WE JUST need to realize that theyre people like us and THE WORLDS not going to end IF it gets awkward
This is so helpful! especially in awkward situations or when you reallllyyy want to talk to a stranger but don't know how, engaging meaningful conversations without looking weird or what.
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:00 👋 *Starting Conversations: Proximity and Eye Contact* - Emphasis on the importance of proximity and eye contact when starting conversations. - Proximity: Choosing people within one or two meters for natural, non-disruptive interactions. - Eye contact: Initiating conversations with those who make brief eye contact, signaling potential interest. 01:23 🌍 *Asking "Where Are You From?"* - Utilizing the question "Where are you from?" as a universal and non-intrusive conversation starter. - Adapting the question based on diverse backgrounds or specific situations. - Highlighting the positive response received from this opening line in various contexts. 01:52 🤔 *Sharing Knowledge and Asking Questions* - Sharing personal knowledge about the other person's background and asking related questions. - Demonstrating genuine curiosity and interest in learning about the other person. - Examples of sharing information about a person's country and asking thought-provoking questions. 03:02 🎭 *Embracing Adventurous Conversations* - Encouragement to be adventurous and take risks in conversations. - Advocating for memorable and authentic interactions through risky statements. - Acknowledging that some people may be triggered, but emphasizing the value of authenticity. 03:58 🍻 *Inviting Them Out and Building Rapport* - Transitioning from casual conversation to inviting the person out. - Suggesting activities like drinks or meals for a continuation of the interaction. - Recognizing that the majority of rapport is built during this phase of the conversation. 04:53 🤝 *Cementing Connections: Remembering Names* - The significance of remembering and mentioning the person's name. - Advising to mention their name once to leave a lasting impression. - Concluding the five-step process for starting conversations and potentially forming friendships.
How to make friends: Be genuinely curious. Pay genuine attention and you'll never run out of conversation. Also be honest, so it's actually you who make the friend, and not a fake persona you put out to be likeable. Might seem simple, but I struggle with it a lot. Luckily I have a coworker that is a perfect example of someone who would make a conversation with a rock, just because he is so curious and honest, so I try to learn from him.
In Eastern Europe eye contact with “From which part of town you are?” is super threatening line.. synonymous for this in English is from the hoods “Who put you on?”, either they run away, or conflict will be unmanageable
I have tried making friends many times. I have watched videos like this one, they usually helped me a bit; to the point people stopped frowning at me. I hope this one will help me as I continue to watch it.
I've come to realize that, it's not that i can't talk to anyone, i just don't have the motivation/strong reason to do so. Because when i do have it, i do it without any problem.
This reminded me of something I did. There was this one girl sitting alone on a staircase staring into the distance. Nobody else was around and that was the only moment where I had my courage up and straight up talk to her. I had to carry most of the conversation of course but it was worth it. She was very shy and timid and at the end I asked for her socials because I think asking for number is a bit too personal. We kept talking afterwards and hung out a few times. Honestly we could've been more but I didn't take a step further because I knew we wouldn't work together or at least I know that she won't be able to put up with my way of living after knowing her more. Anyway, now we stopped talking and I think it's for the best because she started showing her feelings to me and I don't want to lead her on. She's lovely, but she deserves better.
I am very shy person but I don't want to be,so I decided to become a confident person by talking to more people and then I try try try, some time it hurts but sometimes it's became a nice conversation and slowly it getting easier to talk to strangers and to make eye contact with them 😊
The eye contact one is real though! If i want to talk with someone i usually make eye contact with them and then they suddenly approch me and ask questions.
3:10 yes yes yes! I gave a speech once that followed a parallel method. It was titled "What's the Point?" a play on words because the topic had to do with the idea of pointing (the gesture) being considered offensive today, yet it's simply a high risk high reward gesture. Want to know what my "point" of impact was? Uncle Sam. I asked the audience, "do you think Uncle Sam would have been as resonating if he wasn't pointing?"
@@Maryaz259I was in a pretty geeky clique you could say in high school and so all my friends growing up were shy and awkward. Now they’ve grown up, work jobs and can openly converse with people fairly easily. It’s just about experience and confidence.
I so agree with the last point and I think it’s so important to not overdo it. Many other videos talking about how important speaking the name of the person is and while it’s true that it shows that you remember and that you listened I think it can come off weird when you keep saying it. Because it sounds like you’re in a workplace or like a doctor appointment where they keep saying your name it feels weird and not casual at all.
Great video, slight improvement advice: if you make such a very nicely structured and detailed video, do a wrap up at the end where you briefly summarise each aspect in one or two lines so people can remember the overall concept much better. They will also remember the details much better if they can structure them in their head so reminding them of the 5 steps really helps a lot by only adding like 30 seconds to the video
I used to be an introvert, literally avoiding conversations with any stranger or person I didn't know well. I used to just sit at home playing games and whenever I went out I just minded my own business and didn't really communicate with anyone. I realised that's not the life I wanted to live or the person I wanted to be, so I started meeting and getting to know new people. I realised it was not difficult to talk to new people at all but rather interesting. Eventually I started initiating conversations with new people. It's incredible how many interesting discussions I have had with strangers which I never would have had if I hadn't made this change. Most people are very friendly and often happy to talk to you, but people will usually not initiate conversations with strangers, so you should try to be that person. It's very important to read signals though, don't approach someone that is clearly busy or not interested in talking. Read their body language. Now this just feels natural to me, and I will almost always initiate some type of conversation with people that I meet and find interesting. I have many new friends from all round the world that I can just message whenever I want thanks to this.
any tips for me? i sit next to a person i kinda befriended on the first day of school and then he found other friends, now its just silence when we sit next to each other
@@memesbymemeguyman Its simple. You already know the guy and he knows other people. Make your friend introduce you to the people he's acquainted with and befriend them too. Take it easy and be cool. Let the vibe carry your flow gently as you talk to them folks. Remember, there's no obligation upon you to become buddies with these folks but if you truly like them - Go be their partner in Crime! (Metaphorically, not literally hehe)
Ok, I definitely needed this video - thank you. As a [huge] introvert, I almost never start the conversation - even with people I know. Just side staring as if to say 'Please, start the conversation first. I don't wanna to-"
One crucial thing that you need to do.. you need to have a confident body language and be energetic when delivering those questions like you already knew them before and be sure to not have awkward silence in between question so you need to think about questions on the top of you mind.. if not.. you should have a list of questions ready that can work on anyone. Personalities are a real thing but everyone has a different way of thinking and talking.. try to match that.
I find asking questions staright away isn't the best way in my opinion. I find it best to do most of the speaking at first, smile and tell them something funny etc, then I'll ask them a question.
I used to suck at talking to people a few months ago but recently I became good at talking to people, just out of nowhere I can just talk to people about random stuff!
The pandemy really hit hard. Like I’ve had no idea how to talk to strangers for a couple years now. This video is really informative and helpful, props to you for making this awesome video.
Definitely sounds like great advice if, like you mentioned, you're in a place like new york. Contact especially possibly being universal. But I feel like the place and words you will actually say heavily depend on your country and culture of the two people engaged.
I'm not an american and come from a "cold" country where people usually don't make the first move. I remember an american just casually greeting me in the street and we struck a hour long conversation. It was so out of the blue.. but I loved it, gotta learn from You.
Funny how im more scared if i were to ask "What part of town are you from?" That they will ask me the same thing and find out the location i live and- yeah i have trust issues for strangers 😊
I tried asking a few women where they were from and they turned and looked at me very suspiciously and they said "uhh... America??" like I'm some sort of big idiot. Annoyed I responded back, "No, where are you *really* from?" and they called me racist, I said "I'm not being racist, I'm also American just like you" and they said "no Where are you really from" and I kind of understood in that moment what they meant so I called the cops and reported the 3 old ladies for harassing a young stud in public.
What this told Me: Make sure to bring a book or laptop and appear *fully* immersed in whatever I'm reading or seeing. *Never* make eye contact and stay as unassuming as possible so that those around me are aware that I want 0 interactions that do not involve serving me food&drink or the bill. 😂🖤
Never wait for someone to reach you. Base in personal experience, waiting for someone notice you is like the tree waiting for birds. The birds only finds it if they need something from the tree. The majority of time people will search for you if they need something from u. Be real. Ask because you are really interested in them. Something got u curios about them. In the other hand, take risk ( as the video says ). What would happen if you talk to that girl that you find attractive? The maximum is a simple no. And remember that no mean NEW OPPORTUNITiES. Ask what you have to ask. If u find someone curious by something they said, ASK THEM. Probably you will never see them again. Hope u could find this help full.
In my experience I don’t say “hey how are you” or “where you from” The sauce is acting like you know them (step 3 2:35) making an easy ice breaker and making them comfortable. Cracking a joke/ complimenting on what they got on and them talking about that subject. Question them but don’t interview them. Body language will tell if they like your company or not so watch out And remember it’s not what you say but how you say
I never expected myself to watch such a video 💀🤡 I just can't initiate conversations even with my friends, and I wait for them to start. This is the weirdest thing I don't like about myself
Eh this advice isnt great. Especially using "Where are you from" as an Ice Breaker. That's pretty bad and more often than not will probably leave you worse off or make the convo awkward bc you wont have anything to follow up on relating to the place they're from thats meaningful.
The same goes for any opener. Being able to hold a conversation and being able to start one is two different things. In general though, the best opener is the one most calibrated to the situation. “Where are you from?” Works great if the person has an accent for instance.
Mostly when I start a conversation with strangers I start by asking them something then I thank them and smile then I tell them about something I find interesting about them like oh your nails are really pretty or I like the outfit you're wearing it makes you look cute then they smile in return and start a conversation with me and I listen to them
Some people dont like too shar where they came from i would change ur first question with any situiational question its a better than 1 qeustion all the times
Usually, I enjoy socializing, especially with younger people or anyone hanging in my friend group, my friend's friends, etc.. but, I struggle to socialize with strangers.
i was a confident kid knowing how to talk with people and girls, till i met some friends. i noticed they dont really like me i tried to change to be liked. That was a big mistake and im still healing to be the old me again.
The first one is reasonable. Number two though is not. Randomly starting a conversation by asking someone's background is weird and feels unnatural - this is a bad ice breaker. Ice breakers are situation-based. To find out what works, what feels smooth, natural and what doesn't you'll have to try yourself IRL on real people.
As much as I see where you're coming from, I wouldn't say it's a bad ice breaker. There's people who might actually appreciate being asked something about their background. There's no reason to be super specific about your background either so it's not a really hard thing to share a little about. I can certainly agree about ice breakers being used for different situations though. It might help to make more of a connection by relating to the situation but asking things like how're you doing or where are you from are pretty safe ways to help break the ice too especially when someone could benefit from questions like that.
When I was growing up it became a need to talk more, for example asking someone for help. And all these small interactions I had reaching adult life started to slowly take my anxiety away.
Talking with people abroad is always so easy, though english isn't my first language and my accent is pretty heavy. When meeting locals in other countries or even going to events that bring people from several countries it's always easy to talk about cultural differences and whatnot
I guess it can seem weird for some people. Especially if you are man, and you ask woman about the district of the town where she lives. She might think what you're gonna start dating with her
How I Manage To Start A Conversation With Anyone Summary 🌐 Proximity and Eye Contact: Start conversations with people within one or two meters for a natural feel. Initiate talks with those who make eye contact, a form of acknowledgment. 🌍 Ask About Background: Step two involves asking, "Where are you from?" to spark conversation. Thousands of positive reactions to this opening line. 🤔 Share Knowledge and Ask Questions: Step three: Share what you know or inquire about their background. Examples include discussing Bhutan's happiness or intriguing statements about Nigeria. Adventurous conversations make you more memorable and authentic. 🗣 Branch Off the Conversation: Move on to various topics like their occupation, thoughts on the current country, and current events. This step builds the majority of rapport. 🎉 Invite Them Out: Step four is simple: Invite them for drinks or a meal, depending on the city's nightlife. 🤝 Mention Their Name: In the next encounter, casually mention their name to show you remembered it.
"The riskier things you say, the more memorable and authentic you would be for them." This is soooo true! People whom you just met and just want to play safe and say mundane things or topics will not create an impact and a lasting memory.
I love you so much
@@saleemali594love you more pookie
@@saleemali594lil too risky there bud
@@saleemali594went straight for the goal
I love you both Riko and Yohane-chan ❤
I feel like a robot learning how to be a human
Don’t worry, I had the exact same feeling
Don’t we all
I was looking for this comment
Same😭😭
lol me too
breaking the ice gives you a tactical advantage over others. The goal here is not to keep talking, but to keep listening and keeping them as comfortable as you can.. Listening is the best way to do this
Bruh this is touching grass, not call of duty
@@noideas439he's not wrong though. There are many advantages to this; people are more likely to help you later on in any way possible, even if you just say hello. I think it's better to just have a good relationship with anyone you meet.
@@noideas439 Damn i explained touching grass in cod terms lmao..
This is your brain after watching Spy Game.
@@noideas439 On god
For Step #2, an even better question is, "Where did you grow up?" This focuses on their formation as a person, rather than a simple location so it invites them to tell more about their childhood and how they grew up, especially if they moved around a lot/had a less conventional upbringing.
I ain’t sharing all that from a stranger’s opening line
lol, and then he said wtf are you
This is too personal for a 2nd question
This is too personal for a 2nd question
This is too personal for a 2nd question
*Makes eye contact accidentally*
*This guy* "WHERE ARE YOU FROM?!?"
“I HEARD YOUR COUNTRY SUCKS, IS THAT TRUE”
Great conversation
LMAO@@danielkelsosmith
"WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?!?!"
LMAOOOO
🤣
Something I really need in my life is social skills
Samee
Same
Same
Sometimes the problem is not you.
I usually wait for others to talk to me 😂
I always felt depressed when I did this. You just standing alone in the drama club, thinking on the next big talk or something , waiting for someone who would break the ice.
That miserable ice on your back😢
Me fr 😂
But the best thing to do is that you should start the conversation.
Or else the strangers will remain as strangers and gradually ignore you
That's why you don't have skibidi rizz
Same. I'm an introvert waiting for an extrovert to adopt me 😅
While it's true that taking risks and being authentic can make you more memorable, it's important to strike a balance. Being overly risky or controversial may alienate some people and could have negative consequences. Authenticity is about being true to yourself and expressing your beliefs, but it's also crucial to consider the context and the impact your words may have on others.
Effective communication involves understanding your audience, being mindful of the situation, and expressing yourself in a way that fosters connection rather than division. It's possible to be memorable and authentic without unnecessarily risking relationships or causing harm. Finding the right balance between expressing your true self and being considerate of others is key to effective and meaningful communication.
very well said
Bellissimo paragraph 🤌
This sounds like an AI
@@cavidnagiyev3678sounds like someone who has alienated a bunch of people because the people said something that hurt them
What ever Chat GPT-4
I’m a really shy person and I can never carry the conversation. I feel like an alien trying to learn to have a basic conversation with another human 💀
Yeah, I feel that way too. It's pretty hard to start off a conversation without sounding like some sort of interview
Practice practice and practice there is no way you won't succeed!
U can't carry a convo because u have no confidence and social skills and scared to be yourself lol
@@siladex-gamingexactly
@@siladex-gamingthat's exactly how I feel when I try to talk to somebody.
I wish I saw this video 1 month ago. During winter break I went on a cruise for 10 days and my whole routine there was wake up at 6am walk around everywhere on the ship and meet new people and talk with everyone until 3 am. It was one of my favorite experience in my life bc I suffered a lot with social anxiety when I was a kid and since I was 16 I would always try to surpass that and go talk to Stanger in my city. But this cruise was like my final exam. I literally became the most popular person on the boat and every 10min I would say hi to someone I know my friends could not believe it bc it was people from different social backgrounds it was so funny. But I still had some difficulty at some point I knew I needed more knowledge. Thanks again.
congrats on improving your social skills
I just realised I'm really good at talking to people, But terrible at step 1 and step 2.
He was like "here's where it's tricky" and I thought "wait, that's the easy part!"
Getting over the anxiety and just feeling good, Having that energy that others will want to talk to you is so important!
I think one big piece of helpful advice is~ target people who are bored!
I was at an airport with a long line that wasn't moving and everyone wanted to talk to me!
If you have the energy theyll start talking to you, but isnt necessary id say if you start the conversation.
Like, last time i struck a conversation like that i was on the plane, and after some time i got bored, looked at the person next to me, he looked at me, and i just said the first thing that came to mind and the conversation kept going. (dont remember it too well now)
i just realized i'm exactly the same lol. i find approaching someone and starting a conversation so difficult, but once the ice is broken, i can talk for hours on end.
You can invite people out?? nightmarish, I don't even know if anyone wants me around, I could never
"What part of town are y..."
"I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!"
stands up and leaves...
just dosent happen though does it
The fact that I did these steps before even watching this video with a girl I met randomly in the bus makes me feel so powerful 😭😭
same although the order of steps was different, i also became friends with a girl on the bus 😂was that you?
You make it sound so simple and I love that, because this way it becomes simple and natural. Thanks!
Für fortnite
it is simple just try to be confident while you saying
@@CarbonBeast You sure can try this in Fortnite first, yes.
@@teruvert True. I've also noticed it's easier without having alterial motives.
I'm a loser but this one dude spoke to me using these exact steps got me wondering if he watched this too
🤣
Game is game, even if it's the tutorial 😂
.......and I woke up in a Bathtub full of ice with one of my kidneys missing ! 😄😄
All introverts here👋
sup vro
Lez go
yo
attendence
MYOB. 🗿
"hi"
"Uh, hi"
"What part of town are you from"
_Calls the police_
😂🤣😂
for real 😂
Things that never happen for 400 Alex.
&/&:€:€::
Lmao🤣
I tend to overthink what people may think of me or what they might say or how my interaction with them as a whole might go but to honest with u majority of people are really simple. I be getting my anxiety up for nothing 😭
Thats me bruh literally mirrored everything Its so annoying, we'll get over it WE JUST need to realize that theyre people like us and THE WORLDS not going to end IF it gets awkward
💀 this crap gotten out of hand. We watching videos on how to talk to each other
We’re here man
Covid changed up the world
It genuinely makes me sad introverts have to search up UA-cam videos instead of learning from others around them
@@Mudkipp718 people don't care enough to teach such simple stuff lol
@@Mudkipp718 lets be real its not really an introvert thing, but more social anxiety. Sadly im also one of these people...
Learning how extroverts make contact is essential in the development of skills to shut down all communication attempts from strangers
"Hi, Where are you from?"
"Unf!"
"E... Excuse me?"
Its easy, as a former shy person to other shy people, always step out of your comfort zone, always try to be uncomfortable
That first step is always the hardest though
This is so helpful! especially in awkward situations or when you reallllyyy want to talk to a stranger but don't know how, engaging meaningful conversations without looking weird or what.
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
00:00 👋 *Starting Conversations: Proximity and Eye Contact*
- Emphasis on the importance of proximity and eye contact when starting conversations.
- Proximity: Choosing people within one or two meters for natural, non-disruptive interactions.
- Eye contact: Initiating conversations with those who make brief eye contact, signaling potential interest.
01:23 🌍 *Asking "Where Are You From?"*
- Utilizing the question "Where are you from?" as a universal and non-intrusive conversation starter.
- Adapting the question based on diverse backgrounds or specific situations.
- Highlighting the positive response received from this opening line in various contexts.
01:52 🤔 *Sharing Knowledge and Asking Questions*
- Sharing personal knowledge about the other person's background and asking related questions.
- Demonstrating genuine curiosity and interest in learning about the other person.
- Examples of sharing information about a person's country and asking thought-provoking questions.
03:02 🎭 *Embracing Adventurous Conversations*
- Encouragement to be adventurous and take risks in conversations.
- Advocating for memorable and authentic interactions through risky statements.
- Acknowledging that some people may be triggered, but emphasizing the value of authenticity.
03:58 🍻 *Inviting Them Out and Building Rapport*
- Transitioning from casual conversation to inviting the person out.
- Suggesting activities like drinks or meals for a continuation of the interaction.
- Recognizing that the majority of rapport is built during this phase of the conversation.
04:53 🤝 *Cementing Connections: Remembering Names*
- The significance of remembering and mentioning the person's name.
- Advising to mention their name once to leave a lasting impression.
- Concluding the five-step process for starting conversations and potentially forming friendships.
I hope you don't really took notes on this..
Your a real one
@@dazebeats1084 you're*
Thanks for the summary! You are a hero hahah
Made with HARPA AI
How to make friends:
Be genuinely curious. Pay genuine attention and you'll never run out of conversation. Also be honest, so it's actually you who make the friend, and not a fake persona you put out to be likeable.
Might seem simple, but I struggle with it a lot. Luckily I have a coworker that is a perfect example of someone who would make a conversation with a rock, just because he is so curious and honest, so I try to learn from him.
Unfortunately you end up burning out if you do that because it’s so rare that people reciprocate.
In Eastern Europe eye contact with “From which part of town you are?” is super threatening line.. synonymous for this in English is from the hoods “Who put you on?”, either they run away, or conflict will be unmanageable
Where are you from bruv 😂
@@chandansimms9167bro literally said it in the first 3 words
@@immigrantgaming420epic 😂
I have tried making friends many times. I have watched videos like this one, they usually helped me a bit; to the point people stopped frowning at me. I hope this one will help me as I continue to watch it.
I've come to realize that, it's not that i can't talk to anyone, i just don't have the motivation/strong reason to do so. Because when i do have it, i do it without any problem.
Where are u from?
@@tahashaikh524😂😂😂
@@tahashaikh524😂😂
Where are u from?
where are u from?
The title could be "How I Manage To Bully Introverts" as well. I'm going to try this.
instructions unclear i got pepper sprayed when i asked them the first question
I think you know that that’s not the person you would want to hang out with
@@imrocket2417 but at what cost ? 🤣🤣
It's rare to watch a video which actually have good ideas to be implemented in real life.. thank you ❤
This reminded me of something I did. There was this one girl sitting alone on a staircase staring into the distance. Nobody else was around and that was the only moment where I had my courage up and straight up talk to her. I had to carry most of the conversation of course but it was worth it. She was very shy and timid and at the end I asked for her socials because I think asking for number is a bit too personal. We kept talking afterwards and hung out a few times. Honestly we could've been more but I didn't take a step further because I knew we wouldn't work together or at least I know that she won't be able to put up with my way of living after knowing her more. Anyway, now we stopped talking and I think it's for the best because she started showing her feelings to me and I don't want to lead her on. She's lovely, but she deserves better.
I am very shy person but I don't want to be,so I decided to become a confident person by talking to more people and then I try try try, some time it hurts but sometimes it's became a nice conversation and slowly it getting easier to talk to strangers and to make eye contact with them 😊
In France if the first thing you ask is "where are you from" people will think u want to rob them 😂
The eye contact one is real though! If i want to talk with someone i usually make eye contact with them and then they suddenly approch me and ask questions.
Can't believe I came here to figure out how to talk with the members of my own specy
3:10 yes yes yes! I gave a speech once that followed a parallel method. It was titled "What's the Point?" a play on words because the topic had to do with the idea of pointing (the gesture) being considered offensive today, yet it's simply a high risk high reward gesture. Want to know what my "point" of impact was? Uncle Sam. I asked the audience, "do you think Uncle Sam would have been as resonating if he wasn't pointing?"
Tried that opening line in Compton…
Currently commenting from the ICU
It's not about starting the conversation for me, it's about keeping it up and I always fumble cuz I think I'm the most boring person in the world.
If you know the problem change it
I have exam and i’m watching this 😮💨 i mean it’s improvement pill, why not?
Same as you. I have an important exam in 4 days and im here watching improvment videos.
Me too but why now?😢
Bro your editing skills are insanely qualitative and your mic sounds great. Good shit🫡
Talking to strangers is a skill you were born with.
No I developed it.
It's not, its a skill you develop
@@DefinedByDeath you can develop it, because you didn't born with it. But people who were born with it don't struggle, is effortless.
@@Maryaz259 i promise you that isnt the case, it sounds more like an excuse when you say it like that
Every human is naturally social
@@Maryaz259I was in a pretty geeky clique you could say in high school and so all my friends growing up were shy and awkward. Now they’ve grown up, work jobs and can openly converse with people fairly easily. It’s just about experience and confidence.
I so agree with the last point and I think it’s so important to not overdo it. Many other videos talking about how important speaking the name of the person is and while it’s true that it shows that you remember and that you listened I think it can come off weird when you keep saying it. Because it sounds like you’re in a workplace or like a doctor appointment where they keep saying your name it feels weird and not casual at all.
Great video, slight improvement advice: if you make such a very nicely structured and detailed video, do a wrap up at the end where you briefly summarise each aspect in one or two lines so people can remember the overall concept much better. They will also remember the details much better if they can structure them in their head so reminding them of the 5 steps really helps a lot by only adding like 30 seconds to the video
I used to be an introvert, literally avoiding conversations with any stranger or person I didn't know well. I used to just sit at home playing games and whenever I went out I just minded my own business and didn't really communicate with anyone. I realised that's not the life I wanted to live or the person I wanted to be, so I started meeting and getting to know new people. I realised it was not difficult to talk to new people at all but rather interesting. Eventually I started initiating conversations with new people.
It's incredible how many interesting discussions I have had with strangers which I never would have had if I hadn't made this change. Most people are very friendly and often happy to talk to you, but people will usually not initiate conversations with strangers, so you should try to be that person. It's very important to read signals though, don't approach someone that is clearly busy or not interested in talking. Read their body language.
Now this just feels natural to me, and I will almost always initiate some type of conversation with people that I meet and find interesting. I have many new friends from all round the world that I can just message whenever I want thanks to this.
any tips for me? i sit next to a person i kinda befriended on the first day of school and then he found other friends, now its just silence when we sit next to each other
@@memesbymemeguyman Its simple. You already know the guy and he knows other people. Make your friend introduce you to the people he's acquainted with and befriend them too.
Take it easy and be cool. Let the vibe carry your flow gently as you talk to them folks. Remember, there's no obligation upon you to become buddies with these folks but if you truly like them - Go be their partner in Crime! (Metaphorically, not literally hehe)
Actually decent social skills tips. It’s not often I see that on the internet
Ok, I definitely needed this video - thank you. As a [huge] introvert, I almost never start the conversation - even with people I know. Just side staring as if to say 'Please, start the conversation first. I don't wanna to-"
As a Nigerian who’s not in Nigeria, that’s true, sad but necessary.
Is this just a hard to notice way to say that you're smart? Haha
In what way is that true, without the financial capability will you leave?
What about the Billionaires in the country have they all gone ?
No unnecessary drama, straight to the point ....like this video 👍👍
One crucial thing that you need to do..
you need to have a confident body language and be energetic when delivering those questions like you already knew them before and be sure to not have awkward silence in between question so you need to think about questions on the top of you mind.. if not.. you should have a list of questions ready that can work on anyone.
Personalities are a real thing but everyone has a different way of thinking and talking.. try to match that.
right
I find asking questions staright away isn't the best way in my opinion. I find it best to do most of the speaking at first, smile and tell them something funny etc, then I'll ask them a question.
The name part and being genuinely interested part definitely made me remember that I got the same advice from a book. These two are very important…
I used to suck at talking to people a few months ago but recently I became good at talking to people, just out of nowhere I can just talk to people about random stuff!
Tips to get people to open up to you more? I’m a very closed person but love to hear people’s concerns
The pandemy really hit hard. Like I’ve had no idea how to talk to strangers for a couple years now. This video is really informative and helpful, props to you for making this awesome video.
Definitely sounds like great advice if, like you mentioned, you're in a place like new york. Contact especially possibly being universal. But I feel like the place and words you will actually say heavily depend on your country and culture of the two people engaged.
Yes. Americans for instance are more open and ready to have a conversation with strangers, as opposed to Austrians.
@@stueyphone and this is how overthinking starts :)
I'm not an american and come from a "cold" country where people usually don't make the first move. I remember an american just casually greeting me in the street and we struck a hour long conversation. It was so out of the blue.. but I loved it, gotta learn from You.
Funny how im more scared if i were to ask "What part of town are you from?" That they will ask me the same thing and find out the location i live and- yeah i have trust issues for strangers 😊
This is also my go to question "where are you from" I've observed that people open up to me naturally when i ask them this question
first step doesn’t work in london, just got stabbed for asking a gentleman “what ends you from g” 😔
if someone is focus on work it means that person is really passionate or hard working that person interests me
I tried asking a few women where they were from and they turned and looked at me very suspiciously and they said "uhh... America??" like I'm some sort of big idiot. Annoyed I responded back, "No, where are you *really* from?" and they called me racist, I said "I'm not being racist, I'm also American just like you" and they said "no Where are you really from" and I kind of understood in that moment what they meant so I called the cops and reported the 3 old ladies for harassing a young stud in public.
😂
Whattttt?
What this told Me: Make sure to bring a book or laptop and appear *fully* immersed in whatever I'm reading or seeing.
*Never* make eye contact and stay as unassuming as possible so that those around me are aware that I want 0 interactions that do not involve serving me food&drink or the bill.
😂🖤
Did that car just drive backwards at 2:10??
lol I noticed that too😂
😂😂😂 that was funny
Never wait for someone to reach you. Base in personal experience, waiting for someone notice you is like the tree waiting for birds. The birds only finds it if they need something from the tree. The majority of time people will search for you if they need something from u. Be real. Ask because you are really interested in them. Something got u curios about them.
In the other hand, take risk ( as the video says ). What would happen if you talk to that girl that you find attractive? The maximum is a simple no. And remember that no mean NEW OPPORTUNITiES.
Ask what you have to ask. If u find someone curious by something they said, ASK THEM. Probably you will never see them again.
Hope u could find this help full.
It feels like I'm an alien learning how to act natural while talking to humans to colect information about them
This is so sad that we need videos like this.
Great video! Thanks for the advice you give, it's helped me out with being more confident & comfortable in my own skin.
Make a video on both things how to start conversation with someone and how to end conversation with someone.... Its really informative
i tried this with my crush but she had also seen this video but it opened another conversation where she started talking about your channel 😂😂
I just feel great that you mentioned Nigeria in this video
When I make eye contact with strangers, I usually challenge them to a Pokémon battle.
i think thats so true that the risky conversation is more memorable than the boring safe one
Finally, Conversation Manager 2024 🎉🎉🎉🎉
In my experience I don’t say “hey how are you” or “where you from”
The sauce is acting like you know them (step 3 2:35) making an easy ice breaker and making them comfortable.
Cracking a joke/ complimenting on what they got on and them talking about that subject. Question them but don’t interview them.
Body language will tell if they like your company or not so watch out
And remember it’s not what you say but how you say
this might be the best youtube channel I've ever found!!
I never expected myself to watch such a video 💀🤡 I just can't initiate conversations even with my friends, and I wait for them to start. This is the weirdest thing I don't like about myself
Eh this advice isnt great. Especially using "Where are you from" as an Ice Breaker. That's pretty bad and more often than not will probably leave you worse off or make the convo awkward bc you wont have anything to follow up on relating to the place they're from thats meaningful.
The same goes for any opener. Being able to hold a conversation and being able to start one is two different things.
In general though, the best opener is the one most calibrated to the situation. “Where are you from?” Works great if the person has an accent for instance.
Mostly when I start a conversation with strangers I start by asking them something then I thank them and smile then I tell them about something I find interesting about them like oh your nails are really pretty or I like the outfit you're wearing it makes you look cute then they smile in return and start a conversation with me and I listen to them
just stare at them until they say something
1:30 the scariest question when I’m abroad 💀
💀
Some people dont like too shar where they came from i would change ur first question with any situiational question its a better than 1 qeustion all the times
Him: Makes eye contact with girl, "Where are you from?"
Girl: "I HAVE A BOYFRIEND"
Him: T-Poses
Girl: I still have a boyfriend
Him: I HAVE A BOYFRIEND sounds like a nice place
Him: "What country you from?"
Her: "What?"
Him: "What ain't any country I ever heard of, they speak English in what?"
Step 5 is True.
Because it's a bit awkward to Forget name of person who u used to talk years ago 😐
oh how i hate being shy
Usually, I enjoy socializing, especially with younger people or anyone hanging in my friend group, my friend's friends, etc.. but, I struggle to socialize with strangers.
Please Improvement Pill make more videos about this
This is all he does.. since 8 years or so.. maybe you should make something?
@@CarbonBeast I mean about get better at talking
@@edenmauricio8477 or writing, it seems
i was a confident kid knowing how to talk with people and girls, till i met some friends. i noticed they dont really like me i tried to change to be liked. That was a big mistake and im still healing to be the old me again.
The first one is reasonable. Number two though is not. Randomly starting a conversation by asking someone's background is weird and feels unnatural - this is a bad ice breaker.
Ice breakers are situation-based. To find out what works, what feels smooth, natural and what doesn't you'll have to try yourself IRL on real people.
As much as I see where you're coming from, I wouldn't say it's a bad ice breaker. There's people who might actually appreciate being asked something about their background. There's no reason to be super specific about your background either so it's not a really hard thing to share a little about. I can certainly agree about ice breakers being used for different situations though. It might help to make more of a connection by relating to the situation but asking things like how're you doing or where are you from are pretty safe ways to help break the ice too especially when someone could benefit from questions like that.
I think improvementpill knows what he’s talking about
unless you aint on a watchlist i dont see a reason as to why not.
did the full course and i will tell you it is amazing
I love this new animation man!
Thats one of the best videos about this topic I've seen in a long time, thank you!
When I was growing up it became a need to talk more, for example asking someone for help. And all these small interactions I had reaching adult life started to slowly take my anxiety away.
Bro idek why I’m watching this but this is lowkey so interesting
As a Finnish person this is horrifying
Talking with people abroad is always so easy, though english isn't my first language and my accent is pretty heavy. When meeting locals in other countries or even going to events that bring people from several countries it's always easy to talk about cultural differences and whatnot
You’d be amazed how many people talk to you if you throw beer in their dog’s face.
That sure sounds specific 😂
Dogs are the only worthwhile people.
Wow such great advice! Are you speaking from experience?
Thank you, will definetly try it out whenever there's an occasion
I guess it can seem weird for some people. Especially if you are man, and you ask woman about the district of the town where she lives. She might think what you're gonna start dating with her
the way i met my girlfriend, thank ya
How I Manage To Start A Conversation With Anyone
Summary
🌐 Proximity and Eye Contact:
Start conversations with people within one or two meters for a natural feel.
Initiate talks with those who make eye contact, a form of acknowledgment.
🌍 Ask About Background:
Step two involves asking, "Where are you from?" to spark conversation.
Thousands of positive reactions to this opening line.
🤔 Share Knowledge and Ask Questions:
Step three: Share what you know or inquire about their background.
Examples include discussing Bhutan's happiness or intriguing statements about Nigeria.
Adventurous conversations make you more memorable and authentic.
🗣 Branch Off the Conversation:
Move on to various topics like their occupation, thoughts on the current country, and current events.
This step builds the majority of rapport.
🎉 Invite Them Out:
Step four is simple: Invite them for drinks or a meal, depending on the city's nightlife.
🤝 Mention Their Name:
In the next encounter, casually mention their name to show you remembered it.