you’re not boring, you just lack conversational skills as a man

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  • Опубліковано 24 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 152

  • @shloakranja1203
    @shloakranja1203 4 місяці тому +43

    What a coincidence Yesterday I asked this question in Men’s Image Lab that how should I improve my communication skills and Alex today you posted a whole video about it..Great Job 💪🏻

    • @alexcosta
      @alexcosta  3 місяці тому +7

      Thank you for being a valued member!

  • @Believer.63
    @Believer.63 4 місяці тому +24

    Its been 7 years alex i am loving ur videos always ❤
    Keep posting love from India❤

  • @isaiah3127
    @isaiah3127 4 місяці тому +9

    Leaving a conversation with a hot topic is a lot like a writing technique for writing novels. I forgot which author said it. But basically, to never have writers block stop right before you feel you're reaching the end of something. Leave room for wonder. Also, don't think about writing when you're not writing. Which i think can also apply to conversations. I often find myself being overly critical when analyzing past conversations.

  • @vynaltheworld4092
    @vynaltheworld4092 Місяць тому +2

    This is a really good example of how powerful perspective is.

  • @Shreadington
    @Shreadington 4 місяці тому +11

    I FORM new people I meet. Family, Organization, Recreation, Motivations. People like talking about themselves. Let them. Where are you from? What do you do for work? What do you do for fun? What motivated you to start that? I can talk to anyone and form a genuine connection. Works every time.

    • @Majesty12-12
      @Majesty12-12 3 місяці тому

      There's no genuine connection these days anymore. All you have is disagreement and disappointment amongst people these days, and judgement. It simply doesn't work out like that for everyone, to have genuine connections or else I would had friends, and or a family in this world that would've accepted me. Theres no genuine love exists today either, except for the self love I have for myself.

    • @esued10
      @esued10 24 дні тому

      ​@@Majesty12-12 deep 😢

  • @nabintiwari2556
    @nabintiwari2556 16 днів тому

    I am from nepal and right now i am here in romania I have been watching your videos since 2019 and you helped me lot to learn english and better more style❤

  • @Rakyr
    @Rakyr 21 день тому

    I completely agree. Noticed this at college, i would be very social but then when i went home to the countryside where there were barely any people around. I would always start a new semester a bit out of rhythm and then i would slip back into it after a week or so.

  • @thierryfleck546
    @thierryfleck546 4 місяці тому +11

    really needed this..merci Alex

  • @FogoMyYogo
    @FogoMyYogo 4 місяці тому +141

    I needed this! I am on my way to a family reunion 😂

    • @TheDarkCornerX
      @TheDarkCornerX 4 місяці тому +4

      😂 I've been there, they are usually so awkward, how'd it go for you?

    • @alexcosta
      @alexcosta  3 місяці тому +7

      Good luck!

    • @TheDarkCornerX
      @TheDarkCornerX 3 місяці тому +1

      @@alexcosta thanks Alex 😄

    • @FogoMyYogo
      @FogoMyYogo 3 місяці тому

      @@dr.santanic_marco1800 😂

    • @FogoMyYogo
      @FogoMyYogo 3 місяці тому +1

      @@TheDarkCornerX Definitely a lot better with Alex’s tips haha!

  • @jithesha2988
    @jithesha2988 4 місяці тому +210

    iam literally ryan gosling

  • @wuasta2278
    @wuasta2278 4 місяці тому +7

    A really good video, watched you after a long time, same energy. Love Costa

  • @alexcosta
    @alexcosta  4 місяці тому +20

    Don't forget to follow me on instagram.com/alexcosta
    Thank you for watching and have a great week!
    -AC

    • @PrinceKotla
      @PrinceKotla 3 місяці тому

      Continue Fashion Inspiration Lookbook

  • @rakeshsuggana
    @rakeshsuggana 4 місяці тому +3

    Need more videos like these bro, You're my life time role model, I have watched every single video of yours including your past gaming videos to till today's video. I've learnt many things from you and still happy to learn. Thank you so much and huge love bro. ❤

  • @satirthautsab
    @satirthautsab 4 місяці тому +19

    a person who has gone from ordinary to extraordinary!
    love from bangladesh🇧🇩❤️

  • @TheVillageBeast
    @TheVillageBeast 4 місяці тому +15

    Love the videos Bruv 🔥 keep helping the bros ❤

  • @richabharti8016
    @richabharti8016 4 місяці тому

    I am following you from last 2-3 yeare now on Tuesday I am will go and talk to the girl whom I like. Let's see is this trick are worth it. Thanks Alex🧬🧬❤❤❤.

  • @rockshot100
    @rockshot100 4 місяці тому +1

    Above all it is always good to depreciate yourself a little bit, but not much. They let their natural guard down, and makes them feel more comfortable with you. Like, "wow, you play guitar? as hard as I tried to at least learn a little, I was a huge failure.".
    Never try to diminish whatever their accomplishments, even if you doubt it. Everybody likes to talk about themselves the most, so let them. Be humble and honest always.

  • @musicjustinjames
    @musicjustinjames 3 місяці тому

    Alex, this is exactly what I needed. Please keep posting videos like these.

  • @Sachu0369
    @Sachu0369 4 місяці тому +2

    I need this this, dude always post the right thing so cool alex!!

  • @eshw23
    @eshw23 4 місяці тому

    More of these types of videos! Alex you inspire me to self develop as a man and improve all areas and see big progress over time!

  • @tiniciayoung
    @tiniciayoung 4 місяці тому +3

    Awesome points! How did you learn all of this, Alex?

  • @mboxblues7576
    @mboxblues7576 2 місяці тому

    really good video. getting back into dating & watching a lot of these types of videos. most videos give either unactionable advice or are based in anecdotal pseudo-psychology garbage. this is none of that. really helpful. def gonna rewatch before my date tomorrow lol

  • @tablorder1236
    @tablorder1236 Місяць тому

    Ngl, have watched quite some videos on this topic, and you have given some solid tips

  • @aidahimawan
    @aidahimawan 3 місяці тому

    Great education to all of us, alex, thanks! Sending u love from Singapore😘

  • @Mr_Solitude2001
    @Mr_Solitude2001 3 місяці тому

    Hi alex a long time subscriber here , just wanted to let u know u stop coming in my recommendations these few years and i stop watching you a long time ago mainly after covid 19 pandemic, i search for ur channel and it feels go to see you after a long time , ur advices and tricks work well mainly not touching ur face with ur hands to reduce pimples , and style tips for all body sizes , i hope u have a great day and hope u r healthy both mentally and physically, love from INDIA

  • @pradosalvador5
    @pradosalvador5 4 місяці тому +3

    You should recommend a book about this topic on how to speak to people.

  • @davidhamming6206
    @davidhamming6206 4 місяці тому +16

    To be honest, I think frameworks like these make conversations more complicated bc. you’re trying to stick to some conceptual system, making it harder to be in the moment and follow the natural flow of the conversation. Just be ACTUALLY interested in what someone has to say and what you can learn from them, you’ll be fine :)

  • @amunityclips
    @amunityclips 25 днів тому

    I know many have said this already. But i literally have been trying to figure out the last like week how to approach people (mainly girls i find attractive) and talk to them. There's this girl in my film class that is shy who i really want to get to know more. And i just want to be able to not be awkward. Anyways i saw this video and i was like, "No way" so thanks!!!

  • @Loonies2TheTop
    @Loonies2TheTop Місяць тому

    Conversations are so hard! I spend alot of time away from people. Ive gone months without speaking outloud, then when i do try to talk its like i forget how and i stutter and mumble lol

  • @callumhigham8404
    @callumhigham8404 4 місяці тому +2

    I really needed this and I haven’t even watched the video yet

  • @naveennitharwal7240
    @naveennitharwal7240 4 місяці тому

    love' you brother I'm was also struggling from this problem but after the video I feel confident thanx ❤

    • @alexcosta
      @alexcosta  4 місяці тому

      Glad to hear that, thank you! Stay strong

  • @SyedMuhammadAbdullah-ll8rq
    @SyedMuhammadAbdullah-ll8rq 4 місяці тому +1

    Brother make video on mewing, best age to start mewing for boys, guide, results, etc.
    Please 🙏🏻

  • @ajaym6795
    @ajaym6795 2 місяці тому +2

    Lets dissect some of the things he says in this video. He gave some helpful tips but some ridiculous ones also.
    1. 0:00 - What's up with him? Why would we have a conversation with everyone we meet in the next 24 hours? Who is he to dictate who we must talk to? Anyone would naturally and should feel nervous speaking to people they have no business speaking to.
    2. 0:30 - He keeps acting like talking to strangers is the best thing in the world. He says we may be missing out on creating new friendships, business partners etc. Why hasn't he considered that we may have saved us tons of agony by not connecting with a potential sociopath or narcissist?
    3. 0:40 - He is providing us a "framework" just to talk to people. As if this is coding. He also has the audacity to say he's keeping it simple.
    4. 1:58 - He tells us to not pretend like we know everything about them. But later at 3:53 he gives an alternative for asking "What type of music donyiu listen to". He wants us to say "You seem like you'll be into Morgan Wallen". That's just lame. Be consistent dude.
    There are more things I can point out but it's getting boring typing so much

  • @stefmyt5062
    @stefmyt5062 4 місяці тому

    Great video, this honestly seems like it'll help.

  • @ruben5027
    @ruben5027 4 місяці тому

    Good video, comes at the perfect time !👌🏻💯

  • @iiFreekill96
    @iiFreekill96 4 місяці тому +15

    bro is turning every video into a business/advertisement

    • @ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ
      @ΠαυλοςΕξαρχος-γ3κ Місяць тому

      Who doesn't do that? At least he is giving valuable advice for free that our parents couldn't have, unless they went to a specialist

  • @fahimbinreza3194
    @fahimbinreza3194 4 місяці тому +1

    UNIQUE MASTER-CLASS :) thanks AC

  • @aakashsankhla9511
    @aakashsankhla9511 4 місяці тому

    Fascinating STEPS ✅ ALEX ❤️ LOVE FROM INDIA 🇮🇳

  • @jacobmaldonado4670
    @jacobmaldonado4670 Місяць тому

    Great value

  • @lukavidic3303
    @lukavidic3303 3 місяці тому +1

    Yeah maybe it’s easy in america but I live in Europe and this is a whole new world here!

  • @-cobainism-
    @-cobainism- 3 місяці тому

    i like this guy.

  • @AdrielPR22
    @AdrielPR22 4 місяці тому +1

    He’s so handsome ❤

  • @gemologistak
    @gemologistak 4 місяці тому +1

    love from Bangladesh ❤

  • @royt9195
    @royt9195 4 місяці тому

    Alex def make a vid on how to do this but in a college setting

  • @ManvirSingh-ys9zb
    @ManvirSingh-ys9zb 5 днів тому

    Genuine

  • @PrinceKotla
    @PrinceKotla 3 місяці тому +1

    Man Why Don't You Make Fashion Inspiration Lookbook ?? Why Did You Stop It ?? It Helped Me Alot

  • @InfiniteWealthWisdom-k1c
    @InfiniteWealthWisdom-k1c 3 місяці тому

    It was impressive

  • @jonshawunited
    @jonshawunited 4 місяці тому

    This video is great, more please Alex. :) Jon

  • @The-Batman_88
    @The-Batman_88 4 місяці тому +1

    Alex ❤

  • @viscaelfutbol44
    @viscaelfutbol44 4 місяці тому

    I have social anxiety, at the age of 28, it has affected my life

  • @Màťàllà2020
    @Màťàllà2020 4 місяці тому

    Love from india❤

  • @V_2077
    @V_2077 4 місяці тому

    I like how every video you suggest a therapist and then plug your sponsor. We are not stupid

    • @tempestandacomputer6951
      @tempestandacomputer6951 4 місяці тому +1

      God forbid the youtube content creator tries to make money on youtube

    • @V_2077
      @V_2077 4 місяці тому

      @@tempestandacomputer6951 it's snake oil.. putting therapy as an answer to everything he does to sell his shit

  • @adiathasan8721
    @adiathasan8721 4 місяці тому

    Could you make a video where,
    You talk to your 17/18 year old self
    And tell him, 3 things to do and 3 things not to do…❤🇧🇩

  • @paxel1210
    @paxel1210 19 днів тому

    I don't like the fifth rule bcs imo its just artificial. Just be urself. If u enjoy the talk just stick to it and talk. If ppl leave bcs converstation didn't end well just go find better ppl. Let's be honest u prob can't have all the time good conversation so if that is the criteria for someone to make friends then he/she is not worth ur time. I think that's it. Just DO what YOU want.

  • @dominikfarago1250
    @dominikfarago1250 4 місяці тому

    Hi
    Where did you get that polo shirt?

  • @RTFKT-CLONE-X
    @RTFKT-CLONE-X 4 місяці тому

    wheres ur polo shirt from? looks amazing

    • @neo7759
      @neo7759 4 місяці тому

      Polo shirts went out of style about 10 years ago just FYI

    • @anandabliss9997
      @anandabliss9997 2 місяці тому +1

      @@neo7759no they didn’t they’re classic. Especially if you know how to style it. Trends are so short lived. Classic is best.

    • @neo7759
      @neo7759 2 місяці тому

      @@anandabliss9997 Not even close , they are about as classic as cargo shorts. I don't do trends

  • @saidianasabg908
    @saidianasabg908 4 місяці тому

    i don't care about conversations and about people in this point of my life, and i think i feel better now..

    • @mbank3832
      @mbank3832 4 місяці тому

      I get you but sometimes, you just need people for something. Not because you want to but because you have to

    • @CaroLI-lh2re
      @CaroLI-lh2re 3 місяці тому

      True!!!​@@mbank3832

  • @The_KarKnight
    @The_KarKnight 4 місяці тому +1

    W video ❤

  • @Tacocat315
    @Tacocat315 4 місяці тому

    I think to some extent a boring opening can work but you wanna smile and have good energy (and maybe poke fun at how boring the said opening you just made is😂)

  • @jasoncheng7964
    @jasoncheng7964 21 день тому

    Just talk to someone like nothing bad will happen

  • @ChetanShakya-k7t
    @ChetanShakya-k7t 9 днів тому

    What about those who think no one is like you and no one for you here
    Who think that he is in wrong place or society.
    Who bored after some time by pretending that hi like her

  • @techsyndrome3291
    @techsyndrome3291 4 місяці тому +2

    first !

  • @mansurali8741
    @mansurali8741 3 місяці тому

    Im literally Tyler Durden

  • @KanwarAnand
    @KanwarAnand 3 місяці тому

    I am cheteshwar Pujara

  • @TheGrayWolf-q7t
    @TheGrayWolf-q7t 4 місяці тому

    Hi bro

  • @marufibrahim4722
    @marufibrahim4722 4 місяці тому

    Iam literally ryan gosling

  • @Goatmaximusssss
    @Goatmaximusssss 4 місяці тому +4

    Alex you still take finasteride and minoxidil? Hair lookin better

    • @alexcosta
      @alexcosta  4 місяці тому +5

      Yes I do, thank you

    • @Goatmaximusssss
      @Goatmaximusssss 4 місяці тому +1

      @@alexcostacan I ask what dose finasteride you take 🙂

  • @CedrickGonzales-q6j
    @CedrickGonzales-q6j 24 дні тому

    thanks Tony Stark ❤

  • @EmileLN
    @EmileLN 3 місяці тому

    My Mom said I shouldn't talk to strangers 😂

  • @mbank3832
    @mbank3832 4 місяці тому

    Ugh. I hate people. But too bad I need to connect with them since they are useful to me

  • @Jetha-Lol
    @Jetha-Lol 4 місяці тому

    I am literally Johnny Sins

  • @deananthony9518
    @deananthony9518 3 місяці тому

    Where’s Robbi?

    • @aidahimawan
      @aidahimawan 3 місяці тому

      They split about a year ago, bro🙂

  • @SonalDhiman-o2u
    @SonalDhiman-o2u 3 місяці тому

    I want to know fully about the girl that is in room😂😂 so i keep looking at her

  • @bogse
    @bogse 4 місяці тому +1

    I dont blame social media of this one since I had anxiety in this well before social mdeia exists, and I bet many others did too.
    These days I go usually, since as he said, to talk about something we have in commond:"Im wearing red underpants today, what color thong you got today if any?".

  • @jasonkrick1614
    @jasonkrick1614 3 місяці тому

    I already talk to so many people a day.
    Please tell me how not to talk to so many people.

  • @HKOVENOM
    @HKOVENOM 4 місяці тому

    What to do if you have a Stutter?

  • @_ScottBlankenship
    @_ScottBlankenship 2 місяці тому

    I literally talk toooo much

  • @FatNorthernBigot
    @FatNorthernBigot 4 місяці тому +1

    It's a great shame we need this video.

  • @monchichipower6334
    @monchichipower6334 4 місяці тому

    Is ok to have a fixed mindset
    I don’t enjoy Learning as I got learning disability

  • @monhishkaware5635
    @monhishkaware5635 4 місяці тому +1

    i am batman

  • @Aditya1962Singh
    @Aditya1962Singh 4 місяці тому

    I am only afraid to start conversation with girl otherwise i can do with anyone

  • @marley551
    @marley551 3 місяці тому

    One in five?
    Gotta be like three in five

  • @TheGrayWolf-q7t
    @TheGrayWolf-q7t 4 місяці тому

    I just wanted to know about your actual job.

  • @heroic_yt-1
    @heroic_yt-1 4 місяці тому +1

    I am ironman

  • @yuvrajrai143
    @yuvrajrai143 4 місяці тому

    14th comment

  • @adamkenton2585
    @adamkenton2585 4 місяці тому

    Stop changing your thumbnail every 2 minutes

    • @emergencyfood7660
      @emergencyfood7660 4 місяці тому

      Let him do what he wants, it's his page

    • @V_2077
      @V_2077 4 місяці тому

      UA-camrs do it to get more views as their original thumbnail might not work

  • @deva77399
    @deva77399 4 місяці тому

    I am Doom

  • @shaikhkaif6998
    @shaikhkaif6998 4 місяці тому +5

    When are you getting married my man?

    • @TheDigli
      @TheDigli 4 місяці тому

      He already was

    • @eshw23
      @eshw23 4 місяці тому

      Hes to busy pimping.

    • @ivaibhavkr
      @ivaibhavkr 4 місяці тому +1

      No, he hasn't been married

    • @mbank3832
      @mbank3832 4 місяці тому

      How was he married. Robbi dumped him not that long ago

  • @akshsinecure
    @akshsinecure 3 місяці тому

    Seriously Alex🤨, how could you take Better help as a sponsor for this video.
    They've been found notorious for selling their customer data to Drugs & Pharmaceutical companies.
    So, that these medical companies can show anti-depressants products ads to make these people buy their products.

  • @slowfingers6389
    @slowfingers6389 4 місяці тому

    Iam patrick Bateman

  • @chlorine.11
    @chlorine.11 4 місяці тому

    first comment pin please

  • @KT-mm2uk
    @KT-mm2uk 4 місяці тому +1

    This guy is a scam!