How To Get In Your Ex's Head

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  • Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
  • How To Get In Your Ex's Head. If you want to get your ex back, it's helpful to get inside their head and mind. But what does that mean, and how can you do it? Craig and Victoria discuss some general tips and strategies for you to help you re attract your ex and get them back!
    Get Craig's help personally: www.askcraig.n...
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    Get Started on the Creative Healing Course: courses.askcra...

КОМЕНТАРІ • 133

  • @Js-wd6dr
    @Js-wd6dr Рік тому +78

    Most people have a change of heart. There's nothing you can do or say. You go no contact for self preservation

    • @CoachCraigKenneth
      @CoachCraigKenneth  Рік тому +31

      Go into no contact for personal growth!

    • @joshuaalexander9099
      @joshuaalexander9099 Рік тому

      Did you mean a change of heart in getting back and there’s nothing you can say or do to speed it up?

    • @chrlskrkl
      @chrlskrkl Рік тому +2

      @@joshuaalexander9099 change of heart if they wanna be with you/ love you

  • @nicka7738
    @nicka7738 Рік тому +35

    Tbh at this point I don’t want them back I just want them to regret it

    • @adamwood87
      @adamwood87 Рік тому +13

      i feel the same way about my ex: i just want her to recognize that she ended something wonderful. i want her to understand what a shit human she is.

  • @ZodiacSavvy
    @ZodiacSavvy Рік тому +57

    Thanks you guys, R.I.P. Margaret things she said really helped me through tough times this year.

  • @aless55
    @aless55 Рік тому +43

    I am losing faith in the no contact rule. He left me 3 months ago and not a single word from him since then. I think he doesn't care about me anymore 😔 I'll stay in no contact. There's no point in contacting someone who doesn't care about you anymore.

    • @RJ_HTx
      @RJ_HTx Рік тому +10

      Stay strong, I know how you feel. It’s even harder during holiday season. Keep focusing on you.

    • @vik20
      @vik20 Рік тому +4

      Stay strong! Beause of yourself! I understand its hard, but you can only gain.

    • @aless55
      @aless55 Рік тому +2

      @@vik20 I need to believe it. Thank you for your kind words 🙏

    • @adamwood87
      @adamwood87 Рік тому +5

      @Ale L You really nailed it with that last sentence. you say you're losing faith, but i think once you understand that no contact is for you to heal, not for them to come back, you're going to be fine. it's okay to be sad, it just means you're processing the loss. personally, i'd recommend meditation for times when anxiety is overwhelming.

    • @Lovely-ff7uv
      @Lovely-ff7uv Рік тому +4

      @@aless55 I recommend going out and doing something spontaneous or fun. Keep your mind off them

  • @RollTheDiceTwice
    @RollTheDiceTwice Рік тому +22

    I separated from my BM in 2020 and I deep dived into content like this and thought I had learned everything that I had to learn. Fast forward I had 3 month relationship this year that ended with her breaking up with me. I found there was more learning to do and I’m back on the channel consuming content to become better from it.

  • @ZodiacSavvy
    @ZodiacSavvy Рік тому +4

    She said she was done in may, I just left, My ex reached out in September and I ignored her, I was still hurting bad, these videos were the only thing helping. she randomly texted my mom last month but I haven't heard anything else from her.

  • @CoachCraigKenneth
    @CoachCraigKenneth  Рік тому +6

    Take a moment to subscribe to the channel! 🙌

  • @maureengannaway8635
    @maureengannaway8635 Рік тому +6

    Thank you for this video. My ex contacted me and now I know what to do. I'm gonna stay calm.

    • @moonfox89
      @moonfox89 Рік тому

      Hope things work out for you. Keep us posted! 😀

  • @BruceJC75
    @BruceJC75 5 місяців тому +1

    I wish I hadn’t told her I could be her friend. We haven’t stayed friends or been in contact outside of a couple random texts, but I still wish I hadn’t had that conversation.

  • @ola467
    @ola467 Рік тому +8

    This is all very true - as always a lot of wisdom in your video!
    Something I noticed is that any contact with my ex gets me out of my healing process. Half a year has passed and the wound did seem to gradually heal, I was doing more or less ok. But each time he contacts me, especially if it is very friendly the wound gets refreshed again. I do try to keep some distance and buffer not to get overwhelmed but it is very hard. The latest which knocked me again, when he said he wants to meet me and our son and bring some holiday gifts, and it was such a pain to suddenly realise that this year we will have our first Xmas separately… and our son will not see both dad and mom at the same time. I still have so much bitterness in me about this and the trauma that he / we create for our son - no matter how hard I work on myself, it is still very fresh and gard

    • @TheDepiano
      @TheDepiano Рік тому +2

      You seem like a very sincere and caring person. What is your story?

    • @ianmcnally8501
      @ianmcnally8501 Рік тому +1

      I have same setback when I reconnect and fight with my ex, finally a year and a half later, I have been able to let go.

    • @ola467
      @ola467 Рік тому +2

      @@TheDepiano thank you for your kind words! We were married for 20 years (still are actually). One day he confessed that he cheated and don’t love me any longer… I asked him to leave. That happened half a year ago. My spouse does feel the guilt and I guess is consistently trying to compensate it in some way. But this does not help. It is more of a pain to see and hear from him than not to. The worst part is that we have a son together and I do feel guilty that I did not protect him from this trauma. And because of the son I can’t remove him from my life completely. I kind of suspect it would have been easier to heal otherwise. We are also in good relation with my mother in law. She also took this very hard at her. She is not young and her health seems to have been impacted by what happened between us. Though we kind of tried to keep it civil between us.
      So what happened hurt many people around, not just me

    • @ola467
      @ola467 Рік тому +1

      @@ianmcnally8501 how long have you been together?
      We don’t really fight since we parted… we did before…
      sometimes it is hard to keep it calm and not create some drama but I keep myself in hands. Not easy

    • @TheDepiano
      @TheDepiano Рік тому +1

      @@ola467 Stay strong! What are your intentions with him? I’m actually in a similar situation but I was the bad guy. I’ve apologized but haven’t heard from her in 6 months…

  • @lauraa2778
    @lauraa2778 Рік тому +3

    Coaches, great video message once again. I no longer want the "main" ex back but I will apply this knowledge to possible future relationships.

  • @briancarter6553
    @briancarter6553 Рік тому +2

    My wife and I made plans to meet at the gym after no contact she never showed up.....that's how I knew we weren't going to workout..........lol i know this is not a funny issue just trying to give everyone a laugh or smile grin anything im going through a divorce and it's rough so i can relate to how everyone is feeling stay positive focus on being happy with yourself and good luck wish everyone the best.

  • @brianhill6842
    @brianhill6842 Рік тому +3

    Are there any videos about challenges in the early stages of dating such as with an avoidant type personality? A majority of the videos seem to focus on ex’s etc. I’d love some informative videos on avoidants in long distance. I love all the content but I’d like to see more about the beginning stages of dating.

  • @АвгустКорвин
    @АвгустКорвин 21 день тому

    thank you guys, only wish i've stumbled upon that video sooner

  • @piitanarukoka4689
    @piitanarukoka4689 Рік тому +9

    Im in no contact for 20 days and I feel like im going insane 😭 I miss him so much

    • @thebestpossiblescenario2002
      @thebestpossiblescenario2002 Рік тому +6

      You're not alone, 25 days in and all I want to do is text her when I'm not occupied mostly at night before bed, keep going strong we got this! Just remind yourself you're already 20 days in and if you contact them it resets back to 0, and you'll have to feel worse for longer, that's how I go about it

    • @sibusisocedric01
      @sibusisocedric01 Рік тому +4

      I've been in no contact for 38 days now, i must say the first 3 weeks was hell. But it gets better with time you'll be fine

    • @spiritualrituals9603
      @spiritualrituals9603 Рік тому

      Same boat. On NC for 16 days now... I know it's still too soon. But I'm more hopeless as I am also blocked from everywhere. But there isn't much to do other than NO contact.

    • @piitanarukoka4689
      @piitanarukoka4689 Рік тому

      @@thebestpossiblescenario2002 I seriously feel like I'm gonna reach out to him tomorrow. I never had the chance to share my thoughts on the break up since it was so sudden and I was just shocked and accepted it...

    • @archangelelmo
      @archangelelmo 3 місяці тому

      Did your ex ever reached out?

  • @KevinLavorgna
    @KevinLavorgna Рік тому +3

    any videos on emotional cheating and how to work on building back with an ex?

  • @Mystic_Mary
    @Mystic_Mary Рік тому +4

    Wow, he broke up with me almost a year without any closure. I begged, pleaded, without any reciprocation @ all. It hurts beyond my wildest dreams. I did the no contact for several months. Nothing has worked. It's time to gather what's left of my pride & move on. So how do I get over this avoidant/anxiousness?

    • @trust.it.444
      @trust.it.444 Рік тому +1

      I’ve seen people come back after years. So keep working on yourself so you can be ready when they’re back. By then you might not even want them back anymore

  • @Js-wd6dr
    @Js-wd6dr Рік тому +5

    They just don't bother if they aren't interested when you go no contact.

    • @nathantrujillo471
      @nathantrujillo471 Рік тому +2

      No contact didn’t work for me either

    • @PaulW1954
      @PaulW1954 Рік тому +1

      Nor me .. and I gave it 365 days ..

    • @vegitobingui1
      @vegitobingui1 Рік тому +1

      @@PaulW1954 howlong were u together?

    • @Kareena1988
      @Kareena1988 Рік тому +1

      And why would you want a person who doesnt want you?

    • @nathantrujillo471
      @nathantrujillo471 Рік тому +3

      @@vegitobingui1 me 10 years and it didn't work. Just a heads up.

  • @mrkeitt
    @mrkeitt Рік тому +4

    This is right on time. My ex gf broke up with me 2.5 weeks ago. During that time we spoke here and there and she said she misses me but can't be with me because of months of insecurities and overthinking on my end telling me I need to work on myself. We have gifts to exchange for Xmas and she told me I can come on the 22nd. I got upset because my foolish delusional self thought I was gonna at least be invited for Xmas. She got very angry telling me that she doesn't wanna confuse things etc. She told me she's angry because she wants to be with me but she's confused because she isn't sure she made the right decision and me pissing her off is making her feel justified in her choice. So I've pushed her away even further. So I'm gonna fall back until the day of exchanging gifts and try my best to remain strong during the visit and not overstay my welcome.

    • @lar_akhan5671
      @lar_akhan5671 Рік тому +3

      Why are you exchanging gifts if she’s broken up with you?
      She is getting the best of both worlds. Saying she’s confused yet seeing you in her own terms, till she is really over you! Give her the gift of your absence and silence till she realise what she has lost.. and comes chasing you. Trust me she will be knocking on your door. Don’t contact her till she say she want you back.. right now she’s playing with your emotions.

    • @mrkeitt
      @mrkeitt Рік тому

      @@lar_akhan5671 We both had these gifts before the break up. Tbh I just wanna get it over with. She reaches out during times with direct indirect reasons. Once we see each other after not seeing each other for nearly 3 weeks , I'll know all I need to know. She's no gold digger so it's not about wanting anything. Her gifts are always quality and well thought of. We're just in a bad spot and I really messed up with emotional abuse. She calls me up crying and angry randomly. At times I feel like she's toying with me too. But once these gifts get exchanged and we see each other I'm going underground. I'll make sure I look good and smell good as always. She's definitely attracted to me and even gets jealous to this day. I hate this feeling smh.

    • @nbee6217
      @nbee6217 Рік тому +1

      @@mrkeitt I had a vacation and celebrations planned prior to the BU. But when they broke up; those things automatically fell away. The comfort and benefits of a relationship FALL all the way off when those break up lines are drawn. Your situation is even more sensitive because as a man confidence is key to rebuilding attraction, I know you feel guilty but if you have apologised you needed to keep your distance. If you give in to expectations, she loses attraction because she is calling the shots and she got you. Relief stage will be prolonged. You should spend Xmas with those who did not dump you.

    • @mrkeitt
      @mrkeitt Рік тому +4

      @@nbee6217 We spoke today for 2hrs. She explained to me how much I've been hurting her from berating her and just all out ruining good vibes. I didn't realize how much damage I did til we broke up. She wants me back for sure an shows all the signs. She just doesn't want that version of me. I'm in therapy now going on 3 weeks and I'm happy to be doing so for myself. She's an amazing woman and I've never met anyone like her in all my life. Being with scandalous, sneaky, and toxic women for years ruined my perception a bit. I'm not saying she's without fault. But I'm man enough to admit I've played a huge role in this. The fact that she hasn't blocked me , still reaches out direct indirect, sends me pictures of her, cries out of anger, and tells me she wants me but just not this means a lot. We're spending time with each other this weekend and I'm just gonna play it cool and respect her vibes. She wants to come back and even in so many words told how to do it. I'm a good dude and got a lot going for myself and she knows I'm a catch. I just have to chill tf out a bit and I value her enough to do so.

    • @nbee6217
      @nbee6217 Рік тому +3

      @@mrkeitt maturity and open communication seem present- So that is a positive. I wish you everything of the best with your therapy journey🙌.

  • @prettypeach70
    @prettypeach70 Рік тому +2

    Well i never got the break up i just got totally ghosted cold turkey no explanation. That was my break up ,no consideration for my feelings.

    • @Julieanne-f5c
      @Julieanne-f5c Рік тому

      Know how you feel, we had a disagreement on FT and he said he was going end the convo b4 he said something he didn’t mean , said He Loved Me and Goodnight, I of course didn’t know about any of these videos so I text him, no reply , waited 4 days, sent a video message , no reply and now I
      Am going on 45 days of NC, Been working on me and my own stuff, haven’t heard a word, still confused but keep pushing thru each day! It’s been awhile since your post so hope your doing better.

  • @kaellarosenberg421
    @kaellarosenberg421 Рік тому

    It’s hard when you have a kid with someone and the only way to see your kid is to see them as I have no choice which really makes it harder.

  • @Baronide
    @Baronide Рік тому +1

    Yeah, I doubt no contact works after getting dumped four times within four years time. Next March one year of NC completed. And I don't see how she'll experience separation anxiety with new boyfriend and all. I feel like I have talked her into staying with me all these years. It's crazy. I'm not that great at keeping speeches. I started going to therapy after the first breakup when I realised there were things about my behavior which I didn't like. Guess I couldn't put things learned from there into practice. Maybe she just didn't attach to me that much. It's hopeless.

  • @jomo6514
    @jomo6514 Рік тому +8

    Her Loss

  • @REFF1987800
    @REFF1987800 Рік тому +1

    Thanks for the videos and understanding behavior.

  • @medzzzzz
    @medzzzzz Рік тому +1

    when we fight.. i am always here. 😂

  • @chickletmonstah
    @chickletmonstah Рік тому

    Grateful for your vids ❤

  • @callumsparkes7882
    @callumsparkes7882 Рік тому

    i tried that as well but i am doing no contact now

  • @se3_y0u27
    @se3_y0u27 Рік тому +2

    My ex liked me on bumble after 4 month of NC... What does that mean? She is confusing me

    • @nataliegasparri
      @nataliegasparri Рік тому +1

      My ex liked me on POF after being broken up for 7 months. I’m confused too.

    • @se3_y0u27
      @se3_y0u27 Рік тому +4

      @@nataliegasparri I thought about it an swiped her left now... If she wants to contact mehr... She has My number to do so

    • @ΝίνοΠούτσο-λ1η
      @ΝίνοΠούτσο-λ1η Рік тому +1

      Messing with you ,or just spamming likes and just didn't even noticed she liked you .

    • @archangelelmo
      @archangelelmo 3 місяці тому

      Update

    • @se3_y0u27
      @se3_y0u27 3 місяці тому

      @@archangelelmo i can give you one if you want 😄 its now almost 2 years ago. I am totaly Happy that we arent togerher anymore. She has a new Boyfriend and i have a new girlfriend since 2 month. The breakup hurt alot but i am so much happier now and i learned alot. Yesterday she ask me via a friend for a receipt i cooked Back than. I still Like her and she was a important Person in my past, but i would never go into a relationship with her ever again, cause i realised that we are too different

  • @vanceg6387
    @vanceg6387 Рік тому

    what if you already told them you wont be reaching out and have been in nc for a while? Any way to rectify it? Or just keep going with nc?

  • @otbjh7870
    @otbjh7870 Рік тому

    I have an xmas gift for my gf but we never made plans to meet. lol

    • @drosespellhome
      @drosespellhome Рік тому

      I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back ❤️❤️again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman ❤️

    • @drosespellhome
      @drosespellhome Рік тому

      Call or text him

  • @oneprinceofamber1
    @oneprinceofamber1 Рік тому

    3 years, she never reached out. :(

    • @rwentfordable
      @rwentfordable Рік тому +1

      I'm sorry to hear this. I'm at 14 months. I see success stories where the relationship wasn't as long, wasn't at the same commitment level, treated each other worse, they broke up multiple times, and they get back together. Yet some of us don't get one chance, even after all the work.

  • @nadiazoraya2194
    @nadiazoraya2194 Рік тому +2

    Cant wait

  • @livelearnandgrow5422
    @livelearnandgrow5422 Рік тому +1

    While in no contact and you get a text, let’s say after a year,how long should you wait to respond

    • @lauraa2778
      @lauraa2778 Рік тому +4

      Oh my gosh that happened to me last year and I waited a day or two to respond, but wish I had not texted back, trust your instinct.

    • @mcharle01
      @mcharle01 Рік тому +6

      One year 😮😮 - I would not respond.

    • @slydog81
      @slydog81 Рік тому +5

      I would respond by saying "who is this"? You should never get back together with someone who dumped you if they have been away so long or dating other people afterward - you are only a backup plan or 2nd choice.

    • @Lovely-ff7uv
      @Lovely-ff7uv Рік тому +2

      Coach Craig can you please answer this question. It's a good one that happens often

  • @knowthispodcast9182
    @knowthispodcast9182 Рік тому

    Oops lol I’m done lolz

  • @Chocolatesssssss
    @Chocolatesssssss Рік тому

    ❤💯

  • @danimarauz5544
    @danimarauz5544 2 місяці тому

    What if your ex is a nasty Narcissist and u went no contact??